Académique Documents
Professionnel Documents
Culture Documents
TheStigmaOfDoingThingsAlone|HuffingtonPost
EDITION
US
NEWS
POLITICS
ENTERTAINMENT
WELLNESS
WHATS WORKING
VOICES
VIDEO
ALL SECTIONS
19k
Like 369K
ChristinaLing
Justanotherhuman.Thinking,exploring,creating,andhopefully
inspiring.
HEROIMAGESVIAGETTYIMAGES
Iwasdiscussingprospectivetravelplanswithagroupofpeopletheotherday
whenoneofthem,afterexpressingherinterestinvisitingLyon,remarked,
ButIhavetofindsomeonetogowithImnotgoingtotravelthereby
myself.Nobodywantstodothat.
Thesameafternoon,Iwalkedintoacafewithafriendtograblunch.Upon
address@email.com
SubscribeNow
seeinganacquaintancethereeatingsolo,myfriendcommented,Aw,hesby
himself.Maybewecansayhi.Nooneshouldhavetoeatalone.Thatsso
1.78M
308K
449K
Podcast
sad.
ThesestatementsstartedatrainofthoughtonwhichIhadembarkedmany
timesbefore:
AddusonSnapchat
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/christinaling/thestigmaofdoingthingsalone_b_9239900.html?
1/8
10/22/2016
TheStigmaOfDoingThingsAlone|HuffingtonPost
Whyisitstillseenassociallyunacceptabletodothingsbyyourself?
Andwhyisitalwayspresumedthatpeopledontwanttodothings
alone?
Idounderstandwheretheseopinionsoriginate.We,ashumanbeings,are
socialbeings.Weareinherentlyinclinedtobearoundpeopleandthrivein
communityitisonlynaturalthatwewanttoshareinourexperienceswith
others.Socializingandconversingarehowweforgefriendshipsandultimately
helpeachothergrow.
However,itbafflesmeastowhytheideathatsomeonewantstodo
somethingaloneissobizarre.Surebysocietalnorms,activitiessuchas
eatingoutorseeingamovieareviewedassocialactivitiestobeenjoyedwith
others.Butseeingsomeoneoutandaboutontheirowndoesnotequateto
himorherbeinglonely,orhavingnofriends.(Alright,sometimeswhenIam
doingsomethingbymyselfIamfeelingalittlelonely,oractuallycouldntfind
anavailableorinterestedfriend...butthatdoesntmeanIneedordeserve
pity.)
Moreimportantly,Ithinkweareperfectlyentitledtosimplynotbeinthemood
toentertainsomeonethroughoutanactivityorsocialize,ingeneral.
Isitreallysoabsurdthatsomeonedecidestoridesoloforaneveningand
appreciateamealalone?Residinginafirstworldcountrynowadaysentails
considerableimmersioninenvironmentsofdistractionthroughouttheday,
wereinvariablystaringatscreensofallshapesandsizes,andbeing
bombardedwithstimulithroughthem.Ontopofthat,wemustmakereal
humaninteractionswithhandfulsofpeopleonadailybasis.Itgrows
exhaustingwhetheroneisanintrovertorextrovert.Andweallneedalittle
metime.
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/christinaling/thestigmaofdoingthingsalone_b_9239900.html?
2/8
10/22/2016
TheStigmaOfDoingThingsAlone|HuffingtonPost
Beingalonewithyourmind,however,isoneofthebestthingsforyour
soul.
ThatisoneofthegreatestpleasuresIfindindoingthingsalone.Anotheris,of
course,thefreedomtooperateonyourownschedule.Youcanspendafull
hourtryingonclothes(whichseemstohappenfrequentlywithme...)without
thepressureofawaitingcompanion,orspeedthroughahistorymuseum
becauseyoudontfinditthatinteresting.IfIneedtobacktrackforaphotoor
standthereforafewminutestogetitright,Ihaveallthetimeintheworld.
Buttravelingalone?Doesntitgetalittlesolitary?
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/christinaling/thestigmaofdoingthingsalone_b_9239900.html?
3/8
10/22/2016
TheStigmaOfDoingThingsAlone|HuffingtonPost
Well,yesIwouldbeindenialifIsaidotherwise.Oneofthegreatestjoysof
travelisrevelinginthepresenceofawesomehistoryorartwithsomeone,and
IdefinitelyfindmyselfwishingIhadafriendwithmeattimesseeingwhatI
amseeing,eatingwhatIameating,discussingourexperiences.Itsniceto
havesomeonetherewithyousharingthatephemeralmomentthatcannotbe
recreated.
Whichleadsmetomyfollowingpointdespiteallthat,Iamdeterminedto
notletsuchfactorsimpedemefromdoingwhatIwantandwhatspeaksto
me,andyoushouldnteither.Ifyoutrulywanttodosomething,whyshouldthe
prospectofdoingitalonebeanobstacletoyourwill?Intheend,the
connectionyouhavewiththatobjectorgoalisthemostimportant.
confidenceandinitiativetodothingssolo,ofwhichyoushouldbeproud.And
ifImgoingtobefrowneduponbecauseImeatingdessertalonelikeIm
fuckinStevenGlansbergthen,well.Sobeit.
AversionofthispostoriginallyappearedonMedium.Checkoutmoreof
ChristinasmusingsonherMediumpage.
Stayinformedwiththelatestnewsandvideo.DownloadHuffPostsnews
apponiOSorAndroid.
NextStory:
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/christinaling/thestigmaofdoingthingsalone_b_9239900.html?
4/8
10/22/2016
TheStigmaOfDoingThingsAlone|HuffingtonPost
182 Comments
SponsoredLinks byTaboola
The Only 2 Sites You Need to Know About When Building a Website
Top 10 Best Website Builders
How To Make Your Old, Slow Computer Like-New Again (it's easier than you think)
Xtra-PC
How Accurate Weather Forecasts May Hold The Key To Insuring Africa's Farmers
Financial Times | Milliman
Perfect Sense To
Closet
Introverts
Close
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/christinaling/thestigmaofdoingthingsalone_b_9239900.html?
5/8
10/22/2016
TheStigmaOfDoingThingsAlone|HuffingtonPost
WHATS HOT
POLI T I C S
POL ITICS
P OL IT I CS
Curt Schilling Ba
Explain
Trump
Working
POL ITICS
P OL IT I CS
P OL IT I CS
Pro-Trump Congressman:
Trump Said
POLI T I C S
Racist, Anti-
Things To Him
Semitic
ed By Jewish
T EC H
Videos Released
157Comments
Sortby Top
Addacomment...
TomMonkUniversityofGeorgia
Ilovetravelingalone.IgowhereIwant,whenIwant,doingwhatIwanttodowithouthavingto
compromise.IlovehistoryandprivatetourswhereIcanhaveadialoguewithmyguides.Usually,
otherpeoplejustslowmedown.
LikeReply
214Feb17,201612:31am
MaiaHarrisSanFrancisco,California
I'mwithyou,Tom!
LikeReply
6Feb20,20165:16am
DonnaMcCulloughJohnsonStateCollege
Yep.Igotothetheateralone.HalfthetimeIfIbuyticketsIhavetobegforthe
money...nope...goalone...talktowho'saroundyou....enjoythemoment....It'syoursto
enjoy.
LikeReply
34Feb20,20169:22amEdited
IsabelHarrarMysteryWriteratSelf
Itraveloverseassolofrequently.Neverhadaproblem.Otherpeoplewouldbecomea
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/christinaling/thestigmaofdoingthingsalone_b_9239900.html?
6/8
10/22/2016
TheStigmaOfDoingThingsAlone|HuffingtonPost
problem.
LikeReply
19Feb22,20168:28pm
Show4morerepliesinthisthread
JesseSmithVancouver,BritishColumbia
Greatarticle.Doingthingsinagroup,espeicallytravelling,requirescontinuouscompromising.Iam
vocalabouthavingatleastafewdaystobecompletelyonmyown,itslikeavacationinavacation.
LikeReply
128Feb16,201611:46pm
DonnaMcCulloughJohnsonStateCollege
forsure!
LikeReply
1Feb20,20169:20am
BungaM.FaisalLondonSchoolofPublicRelations
vaception
LikeReply
2May16,20163:58pm
JohnObermeierAtlanta,Georgia
FormostofmylifeIthinkothershaveviewedbeinganintrovertasacharacterflaw,andalltoo
oftenpeopleequatebeingalongwithbeinglonely.Articleslikethisinrecentyearshavegivenme
themotivationtoembracemyouterintrovert.Mytshirtsays:"Introvertsoftheworldunite!We're
here,we'reuncomfortable,wewanttogohome."
LikeReply
76Feb17,20167:29pm
MarkLoweWorksatWww.minimalistlifestyle.wordpress.com
Hellsomepeopledon'tgetus!Someonewasgivingmegrieftheothernightforpostinga
commentsimilartothetitleofthispost!!
LikeReply
2Feb20,20164:29pm
SamWagenerChristchurch,NewZealand
Introversionhasnothingtodowithsocialskills,it'sabouthowmuchsocialactivityyoucan
dowithoutneedingalonetimetorefresh.
LikeReply
18Feb21,20161:57pm
MelissaButzUhlDingle
SamWagenerIconcure.Ilovethesaying...Introvertsunite.Inyourownhomes.lol
LikeReply
3Feb22,20164:13pm
MattHearnden
Itotallygetthis.Ilovedoingthingsonmyown.IknowI'mjudgedforit,but,honestly,thatjust
makesmeloveitevenmore.Greatpost.ThanksChristina
LikeReply
59Feb17,201612:33am
GabbyNelsonDirector,CommunicationsandChangeManagementatCargill
I'mcurrentlyatacabinbymyself.Ispenttwodaysreading,journaling,drinkingwinebesideafire.
Allbymyself.Ifeelreenergizedafteratoughfewmonthsatwork!It'sagifttogooffandbeby
yourself!AndwithAirBNB,it'smoreaffordablethanevertotakeasolominibreak!
LikeReply
68Feb17,201610:52pm
GracePhua
thatsoundssoawesome!I'dliketodothissomedaytoo
LikeReply
2May12,201612:31pm
ReneeMwendaaPresenteratCapitalFm89JubaSouthSudan
Iamsojealousofyou!!WishIcoulddothiseveryothertime
LikeReply
1May12,20167:49pm
DougRobersonBostonUniversity
Havingacompanioncanbeusefulandcansparknewideas,yetitalwaysinvolvescompromise
andquiteoftenleadsapersontorefrainfromanactivityornotengageinitfully.Irelishthe
experienceoftravellingalone.
LikeReply
43Feb16,20169:17pm
AngelaFloyd
Hikingalonegivesmesomuchpeace.Thereisatimeandplacefortogetherness.Butmypeace
comesfrommyself.
LikeReply
28Feb16,201611:18pm
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/christinaling/thestigmaofdoingthingsalone_b_9239900.html?
7/8
10/22/2016
TheStigmaOfDoingThingsAlone|HuffingtonPost
DianeWise
Ihearyourloveofnature,butbecarefulbeingaloneoutthere.Sad,butunfortunatelya
necessity.Justbesafe!
LikeReply
4Feb22,20162:06am
JoanneThomasNorthernMichiganUniversity
"Oncealone,IhavetheopportunitytoponderovermatterstowhichIhavebeenmeaningto
devotementalattentionortothinkaboutnothingatall,andsimplyappreciatethepresent
moment."Possiblythemostconstructivethingyoucoulddowithyourtime~
LikeReply
22Feb16,20169:06pm
IvanaGraceBellingham,Washington
Peopleseemtoassumetheyhave'donesomething'toalienate,upsetorangermewhenI
sayI'mgoingtodosomething'bymyself'...Foraccommodationtotheir'selfization',Inow
justsay,'I'mtakinga'sabbatical',tolistentoGOD',andsofar,everyoneis'respectful'of
that...noboundaries/explanationsnecessary!
LikeReply
3May19,20163:39am
JanicePetersUCLA
IdecidedwhenIwas19andmovedtoLAthatIwouldneverletthelackofacompanionstopme
fromdoingsomethingIwantedtodo,andIneverhave.I'vetraveledallovertheU.S.aloneand
spentawonderful2weeksonmyowninGreece,meetinganassortmentoffriendlypeoplefrom
othercountriesandexploringalltheancientsitesthatfascinatedme.Iactuallyprefergoingto
moviesalonebecauseIliketositwaydowninfront.Dinneratarestaurantaloneisfun,butIdo
takealongabook.I'vedonelotsofthingswithfriendsandfamily,too,butthealonetimeshave
oftenbeenthemostemotionallyrewarding.
LikeReply
17Feb18,20163:32pm
PennyDiannaUniversityofIowa
Igotaccustomedtobeingalone,fromkindergartenup,despitebeingbornintoalargefamily.My
firstschoolwassegregatedandallblack.ThefactthatIwassmallformyage,underweight,and
lightskinneddidnothelpmetomakefriends.IwasoftenpushedtothegroundwheneverI
attemptedtointeractwiththoseclassmates.Exceptforthecompanyofayoungboy,crippledby
polio,Iwasmostlyalonewhenhewasnotaround.Noonewantedtoplaywithhimeither.
Strangely,Ihavenoregretsaboutanyofthis.Igottodothingsanddiscoverthingsonmyown
withouthavingtodealwithpeerpressure,turningmeintoanindependentthinker.Today,asan
adult,however,Ihavemorefriendsandacquaintanceswhosharemyexperiences,interests,
values,andtastesandI'veneverfeltlonely.
LikeReply
19Feb17,20165:14am
Load10morecomments
FacebookCommentsPlugin
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/christinaling/thestigmaofdoingthingsalone_b_9239900.html?
8/8