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Introduction
There are several ways that each individual might see themselves at different times. The
obvious and immediate qualifiers that others use in our society include, but are not limited to,
race, age, sex, gender, sexual preference, and religion. Being a member of the dominant
groupings of each of these popular identifying categories, I tend not to focus on them. I do,
however, identify with other important aspects of myself that I believe shape my culture. I am a
husband, a father, a musician, an ally to the LGBTQIA community, and a student. These are all
very important pieces of me and the main ways that I view myself. The order is roughly from
most to least important, however, they are all incredibly important aspects to me in my personal
and cultural self-identification.
Symbol Descriptions
Husband: I have chosen the traditional symbol of wedding
rings to signify my role as a husband. I wear my own
wedding ring every day as a reflection of that identity to
both remind myself and to proudly display that identity to
others. I am a husband. I am a man fully devoted to his
wife. I love my wife, Amy, with every part of myself and very strongly believe that when we
were married we started our journey as one. We are most certainly two distinct personalities, and
two unique individuals with differing opinions, but we are even more certainly one entity and
one soul moving through life. It is because we are one in the same in so many regards that to
identify myself without mentioning my role as a husband would be leaving out half of who I am.
husband. When I stop to reflect on the ring I wear and what it means, I get a feeling of pride in
being an honest and loving husband. My actions reflect these beliefs in staying honest and loyal
to my wife. An outsider to the culture may see this is as simple ornamentation or jewelry. Many
within my culture also see wedding rings and marriage as unnecessary formalities. To me,
however, it is a displayed promise and an intentional identification of love and devotion.
My son, physically or not, is with me wherever I go. I always have pictures that I am
more than happy to share with friends, family, coworkers, and acquaintances. Seeing my son
when I am away from him makes me happy and bolsters my belief that being a good father is
one of the most important things I will ever do with my life. In many other cultures, photos are
not as readily available, so the massive amount of pictures that I carry with me or display in my
office may be confusing. I think that the love a parent has for their child is universal, but the
love a father shows to his children may not be as universal. This outward display of emotion and
love for my son is a part of my culture and a welcome identification of my pride in being a
caring father.
For as long as I can remember, there has not been a single day that I havent sung at least
once. This is not always a reflection of happiness, as there have been more than a few days
without any. The symbol I have chosen to show my identity as a musician is a photograph of me
living out that identity. It is hard not to identify myself or see myself identified as a musician
when I stand on stage in front of hundreds (occasionally thousands) of people and display that
identity outright. I have worked hard to become recognized and appreciated because, like most
Americans, I believe that status is earned through accomplishment (Weaver, 1999). While not
performing, I still heavily surround myself with music to play to the mood or feeling I am having
in that time. I see music as an outlet for any emotion and within my culture music is an
important creative outlet and source of entertainment. Like parenthood, I believe music is
universal, though lines blur regarding genre and classifications. There are also different stigmas
directed towards musicians ranging from lowly peasants to pedestalled gods. I certainly do not
classify myself as either, but do wear the distinction and identity of musician proudly.
The Straight Ally flag is an important symbol to me and the most encompassing
symbol I could think of to identify myself as a friend to the LGBTQIA community. It is an
unfortunate part of my history that I was not always an ally to the community. When I was a
senior in high school I wrote a paper on why gay marriage should not be allowed on the basis of
religion. Over time, I came to question whether or not this was a justifiable reason to deny rights
and social privileges to an entire group of people and wholeheartedly decided that to me, it was
not. According to Bennett (1993) and his Intercultural Sensitivity model, I went from stage 2 in
defending my culture and identity against LGBTQIA community to stage 6 of integration of the
LGBTQIA culture into my own over the course of a couple years. My volunteerism and
outspoken advocacy for LGBTQIA organizations and causes is now part of what makes up my
cultural identity and supports the cultural value of equality. I am proud to support my friends and
community members in their fight for social justice. Many people both inside and outside of my
culture believe that any sexuality or gender identity outside of heterosexuality and cisgender
roles is unnatural, amoral, and/or a mental illness. It is important to me to identify and stand
with LGBTQIA community members to fight these views and work towards social justice. The
Straight Ally flag may be viewed by those outside of the culture as confusing, especially if
they are oppositional to the causes or unfamiliar with the community. I believe, however, that
my identification and willingness to stand alongside my friends is an important testament to my
character and cultural identity.
The final symbol of the logo for Colorado State University (CSU) is my reminder that I
have goals and ambitions which are pervasive in my everyday life. Every day may not be
consumed by graduate coursework, but every day offers a learning experience that I often seek
out. I have become so ingrained with this aspect of my culture that I actively search for ways to
learn each day whether it be looking up a subject that piques my interest, teaching myself a new
concept at work, or watching a television program on a subject I am not familiar with. I have
shirts with the CSU logo that serve to remind me of these goals and also display my identity as a
student and member of the learning community. Those unfamiliar with academic culture may
still recognize the symbol of learning identified by a university logo. Some may not make the
connection or, if the connection is made, may not understand the importance I place on learning
and education. I truly believe that learning is a constant part of everyones life whether or not
they are cognizant of it. This is a direct reflection of the importance my culture places on
education. Because I have made it an overt part of my identity by my current role as a student in
a formal learning setting, I display the identity proudly.
Reflection
These are not the only ways that I identify myself, and surely are not the only ways that
others view me. I am multi-faceted and have many different cultural traits and identifiers. I also
do not know every aspect of my culture that others perceive when they meet or see me. This
exercise did, however, help me to understand not only how I do see myself but also how I do not
see myself. Kirk and Okazawa-Rey (2013) explain this that being a member of all major
dominant categories does not often lend itself to realizing or recognizing that these categories
(such as race, gender, sexuality, sex, ethnicity, etc.) are a major part of identity and social
advantages. I have also realized that they do play a major role in both how my life unfolds in the
greater world around me and how people of subjugated groups likely view me. This last piece is
the main takeaway for me because I now feel much more aware of these social groupings. Not
to say that I did not previously notice any groupings, but my attention to it was not focused or
intentional. With recognition to others keen awareness of their subjugations, I feel like I am
more likely now than ever to notice these groupings and approach people from a place of
understanding. Not an understanding of their cultural background, past struggles, or day to day
life, but rather an understanding that they likely are forced into an awareness of their societal
classifications. With this understanding, I feel that I am in a better place to grow, appreciate, and
create a more equitable experience for those people I interact with. I also feel that I am better
positioned in my professional environment to approach others in a fair and honest way. This
knowledge of my own cultural naivety allows me to be more candid and reach out to peers for a
better understanding of their culture and experiences. Learning from my coworkers will greatly
improve how I am able to communicate and will help me to become not only a better employee,
but also a better person.
By recognizing why I do not see myself in certain ways, I am able to see why others
might see themselves the way they do. This has led me to want to raise my awareness and
understanding. My culture is who I am, but there is more to the world than who I am. If I ever
hope to truly interact with it, I must first recognize that my values, beliefs, and hopes are not
necessarily the only ones, nor are they necessarily always the right ones.
10
References
Bennett, Milton J. (1993) Towards a developmental model of intercultural sensitivity In R.
Michael Paige, ed. Education for the Intercultural Experience. Yarmouth, ME:
Intercultural Press.
Kirk, G., & Okazawa-Rey, M. (2013). Who am I? Who are my people? In M. Adams
(Ed.), Readings for Diversity and Social Justice (3rd ed., pp. 9-15). New York, NY:
Routledge. (Women's Lives: Multicultural Perspectives, (2001), 49-59)
Weaver, G. R., Ph.D. (1986). The iceberg analogy of culture. In M. R. Paige (Ed.), Cross
Cultural Orientation: New Conceptualization and Applications. Landham, MD. (p. 135).
Weaver, G. R., Ph.D. (1999). American cultural values. In Kokusai Bunka Kenshu (Intercultural
Training) (Special Edition, pp. 9-15). Winter.