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Hello James
If you look carefully into who you are you will not find a
special person with a unique history, someone who wants
some things and doesnt want other things. Well, you will,
but you will see that this person is just concocted out of
memories, that it has nothing to do with the always present
conscious being that looks out from behind your eyes. If you
deeply investigate yourself you will only find the oneness of
consciousness or awareness.
When you start to look within with the help of this method it
may feel as if someone or something is watching you. It is
not a someone like a God. It is often called God but God is a
problem word because of all the projections that the human
mind has saddled it with over the centuries. It is natural to
personify things but it is not always helpful. God is not a big
person in heaven, but it may seem like someone because it is
conscious. It may be a little spooky when you realize that
something is watching you all the time. This impersonal
watcher that lights up your thoughts is often called the
witness. What you will discover if you take this journey into
consciousness is that that kindly light that is watching you is
actually who you are! This simple light that shines in your
heart shines in the hearts of everything. It, you, is
everything and yet is is free of everything at the same time.
This freedom, this aloneness that is the nature of conscious
beings, is not at all lonely. It is just the understanding that
nothing but you exist. When you know it better, Jane, you
will be completely comforted. You will feel content.
James: Until you know that you are awareness and not Jane
the feeling of frustration, separation from what your Heart
wants, will be there. It is a symptom of duality, of
separation.
Also you say you want to 'be.' You cant be. Be is not a
verb, Jane. Why? Because you already are. Find out who
you are.
James: Well, one day you will see that 'this very thing is
you. That is what non-duality means.
James: Oh, youre already awake, Jane. This longing you feel
is a sign that you are awake.
James: I hope this wasnt too much for you, Sally. Let me
know what you think. Im happy to discuss these things with
you. If non-duality is too difficult then we can approach your
desire for freedom through union in a different way.
Love,
James