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Abby Dorman
CE 341
CPO 612
May 2, 2016

I Am a Pilgrim

1) My spiritual pilgrimage began on November 17, 1994 when I was

born to Tom and Lisa Dorman in Colorado Springs, Colorado. At the

time, they were working in full-time ministry for Athletes in Action. The

way they raised me and the example they showed me in their daily

lives served to point me to Christ starting at an early age. I went to

Sunday school every weekend, and we often prayed and read Bible

stories together as a family at home.

When I was about three years old, I prayed with my parents for

Jesus to come into my heart. However, I wouldnt pinpoint my

conversion experience until a summer camp in middle school. That was

the first time in my life when I began to understand what it meant to

have a relationship with God and that His Word was for me. I started to

read the Bible in order to try to understand it, and my middle school

youth pastor was willing to answer any questions I had. I looked up to

him a lot for wisdom and guidance, but he left the church suddenly

when I was in seventh grade. The new youth pastor came in and

selected some students to be in a leadership group, but I wasnt one of

them. Rather than being built up and included by the body of believers,

I felt like an outsider in the place that had previously been full of life

and excitement for me.

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Because of this, I felt a lot of bitterness towards youth group and

didnt feel comfortable there again until my tenth grade year. At that

time, I finally felt validated by being chosen as a student leader, but

the high school youth pastor had trouble with consistency and

following through on his word. I grew to distrust him and became

cynical about youth group in general. By the time I was a senior in high

school, I was ready to move on and didnt want to keep putting in effort

to any relationships I had built there. Even though I had attended the

same church my entire life, I felt freedom rather than regret when I

moved away to college.

However, I also learned some formative spiritual disciplines when

I was in high school. I started to journal and read my Bible on a

consistent basis, as well as being involved in a small group Bible study

on my basketball team. Sports were a big part of my life, and my high

school coaches were very influential in teaching me about what it

meant to be a Christian athlete. They set a great example of

prioritizing Christ over all else and glorifying God through athletics.

Through injuries and major games lost in my high school career, I

learned about Gods sovereignty in allowing things to happen that

werent according to my plan. His grace allowed me to learn that

everything besides Him that I decided to place my identity in could

eventually fail me.

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Although I first started to learn this concept in high school, once I

entered college I realized how much I still relied on success and

affirmation to comprise my identity. One of the main reasons I came to

Wheaton was to play basketball on a team with Christian teammates

and coaches. As a freshman, my hope was to have success on and off

the court. For the first time ever as a basketball player, I found myself

sitting on the bench most of the time instead of playing on the court.

Basketball failed to satisfy me in ways that I hoped it would, but God

used my shortcomings to reveal his unconditional love for me. By

being humbled and unable to rely on my own abilities, I realized that in

any area of my life, success or failure would not determine my value in

Gods eyes.

While the actual basketball aspect of being on the team forced

me to learn through difficulty, the community that I found on the

basketball team was a huge encouragement in my spiritual life. My

teammates demonstrated to me what it means to love one another

with Christs love. When I was an underclassman, older girls took the

time to ask me how I was doing and to walk alongside me during hard

times, always pointing me back to the cross. They helped me to

mature in my faith and in other areas of life. Now as an upperclassman,

I have the privilege to pass along the same kind of discipleship to

younger girls in the program. I have seen how people from all different

background can come together and be unified by the blood of Christ.

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Ive experienced many other life-giving relationships at Wheaton,

but Ive also experienced times of spiritual dryness. Ive gone through

seasons when my devotional time felt like a chore and I could barely

think of what words to pray. The summer before this year, I

experienced a time when I had a heightened awareness of the

presence of God. I toured Israel and gained a whole new perspective

on Gods Word after reading it in its original context. Then I worked at a

Christian camp for four weeks and experienced Gods faithfulness to

use me even when I felt unqualified and exhausted. After being

removed from these experiences for several months and stuck in a

routine at school, I missed feeling thirsty for Gods word. Thankfully,

instead of being discouraged by the times when I dont feel as close to

God, I learned that He is always present whether I feel it or not.

2) In The Pilgrims Progress, John Bunyan uses a symbolic narrative

to describe the journey of the Christian life. The narrator of the story

has a dream that makes up the first half of Bunyans book. In this

dream, the Evangelist tells a pilgrim named Christian that he must

leave his home in the City of Destruction. Christian complies, although

none of his friends or family members are willing to come with him.

One fellow townsman, Pliable, comes but quickly turns back at the first

obstacle they face. Christian carries a heavy burden on his back that

drags him into the Slough of Despond, but a man named Help rescues

him. Now alone, Christian continues on his journey and is encouraged

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and helped by men named Goodwill and Interpreter. The Interpreter

gives Christian insight into what challenges he will face if he continues

on his journey, but tells him that he can overcome them if he keeps his

faith. At this point, Christian is still carrying his burden on his back.

However, when he sees the Wall of Salvation, which surrounds the

cross, his burden falls away. Three characters known as Shining Ones

give Christian a certificate that will admit him to his end destination,

the Celestial City.

Christians next stop is called the Palace Beautiful, a rest stop for

weary pilgrims. The owners daughters give Christian weapons that he

will need for his journey. Christian then meets a monster named

Apollyon who claims to be his master, but Christian defeats him with

his new weapons. After passing safely through the Valley of the

Shadow of Death, Christian meets another pilgrim named Faithful. They

encourage each other along the journey, but end up in a city called

Vanity. The city is full of sin, and Faithful and Christian are heavily

persecuted. Faithful is killed, but Christian escapes from imprisonment

and continues on.

Christian then meets another pilgrim to accompany him named

Hopeful. They hear of a shortcut to the Celestial City, but are tricked

and end up in Doubting Castle. The Giant Despair tries to keep them

there, and they struggle with heavy discouragement. However, they

eventually escape by using the key of Promise to get out of the castle.
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Now, the Celestial City is almost in sight. They enter the Delectable

Mountains and are warned not to fall asleep or wander into the hills of

Caution and Error, where many other pilgrims had been led astray.

They meet other pilgrims along the way, such as Little-Faith,

Ignorance, and Atheist, who are all looking for something wrong in their

journeys. None of these pilgrims can stay on the correct path to the

Celestial City. Right before the city, Hopeful and Christian have to cross

a river that has no bridge. Christian starts to drown, but Hopeful

reminds him of the name of Jesus and Christian finds the strength to

pull himself out. At the gates of the city, Hopeful and Christian are

welcomed by the Shining Ones because they kept Gods truth, and

they are given new golden garments.

At the end, the narrator wakes up and tells readers the

importance of interpreting his dream. He basically says that all of it has

meaning and should be examined to find out how it applies to our own

lives. The story gives Christians an accurate understanding of what life

is like. Just as the pilgrim Christian went through times of despair,

discouragement, danger, and deception, Christian believers will be

faced with difficult times. However, Bunyan shows us that Christian

was never completely alone or without hope. Even in the times when

Christian thought that he would drown or be overcome, he either

received help or found strength in remembering the name of Jesus.

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The Pilgrims Progress gave me a good illustration of how the

Christian life isnt just one slow and steady climb upward and onward.

Just as in Christians journey, there is a constant mixture of valleys and

mountaintops. There are also constantly opportunities to be led astray

by false teachers and temptations. However, giving into sin or trying to

follow a different path will never lead to the end destination of eternal

life with God. Christian remained faithful to the truth because he

journeyed alongside other pilgrims who had the same destination.

They encouraged each other to stay alert and not give in to

distractions. If Christian had been completely alone, he would have

been overcome by evil several times. It was a good illustration of our

need for a community of believers to strengthen and encourage us in

our journeys.

3) Personally, I find that I get sidetracked in my journey by glory

that the world offers me and my own pride in thinking that I can do it

all on my own. I am attracted to praise, and I often strive to do

whatever I can to be liked by the people around me. Too often, I give

approval to things that I know are wrong just so that Im not perceived

as over-bearing or judgmental. I can be like some of the faulty pilgrims

that Christian encountered on his journey who either didnt back up

their talk with actions or were easily distracted by worldly pleasures.

Other times, I have a tendency to rely on myself whenever Im

faced with a difficult decision. Like Christian when he found himself

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drowning in the river before the Celestial City or the Slough of

Despond, I try to get through on my own strength and then realize that

I cant. Through those illustrations, Bunyan shows how God allows us to

push forward on our own but never leaves us without hope when we

cry out to him. He continues to give us grace even when we reject it

time and time again. Bunyan also gave a powerful illustration of how

our burdens fall away at the foot of the cross. No matter what Christian

did, he could never be rid of his burdens until he saw the cross. I think

that I sometimes unnecessarily keep my burdens to myself when all I

have to do is take them to Jesus. It stems from my pride and feeling

that I am capable enough to handle it on my own, but I always find that

its only when I give in and surrender that I am free.

Overall, Bunyan emphasizes steadfastness and humility as keys

to overcome the kind of obstacles I struggle with in my pilgrimage.

Christian faced many enemies who tried to convince him to follow

them, but he bypassed them because he kept his eyes fixed on his

creator. He also had to be discerning about which people to make his

journey with, because he realized that some were not heading the right

way. When he finally reached the Celestial City, he was admitted

because he held fast to the truth of God under trial. Christian was also

willing to learn from those who had more wisdom than him. The

Interpreter, the Evangelist, and even his fellow pilgrims Faithful and
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Hopeful, all helped him in his journey by reminding and teaching him of

truth. Christian wasnt afraid to rely on them for support or guidance.

4) I think that as a pilgrim on my journey, it is essential to be aware

of the other pilgrims that are traveling around me. Just as I need those

with more wisdom and experience to pour into me, I have the privilege

of sharing my experience with those who are not as far along. I would

caution them against some of the mistakes Ive made and obstacles

Ive encountered, but I think one of the most important things Ive

learned is that the spiritual journey is never a smooth one. No Christian

should expect to always make the right decisions or always feel like

they are experiencing growth. There will be times of spiritual dryness

or deep discouragement. I would want to make sure that a younger

believer was aware of that and also tell them that it often isnt due to

any fault of their own. Spiritual dryness can be linked to sin, but

sometimes it is just a season of life. I would encourage them that even

in times when they feel far from God, He is still the same. Gods

presence isnt dependent on our emotions.

Another one of the most important things I would share with a

younger believer is the importance of community in their spiritual

journey. For me, the community Ive found in friends and teammates in

college has helped me through both discouragement and excitement,

and even helped me recognize sins and shortcomings in my own life.

All believers should be involved in some way in a church, but also have
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a mentor or friend that they can share their struggles with. While only

Jesus can ultimately ease our burdens, fellow pilgrims can walk with us

through both the good and bad times and remind us of truth, just as

Hopeful reminded Christian of the name of Jesus when he was

drowning in the river.

The pilgrimage is a difficult journey but also ultimately the most

rewarding one. Its good for any pilgrim to know that the road will have

many turns and obstacles, but none are too great to overcome with

faith in Jesus. It is the job of fellow pilgrims to encourage each other in

the truth so that when they reach the end, they will be found faithful.