Anna Gerlich

Artifact Information: My conversation with a friend that told me she was

pregnant
Date: March 2016
Related Chapter: Chapter 4: Listening in Human Communication

Description:
I remember the day like it was yesterday. I was sitting in class and I got a
text from my friend who was at her doctors office. I knew she was going for
a pregnancy test and I was avoiding accepting the fact that the tests would
probably come back positive. The text just said, Im pregnant. It was a
simple text, but it changed so many things. I knew there were many
conversations between the two of us to come regarding her situation.
Listening was going to be a critical skill that if I hadnt perfected already, I
would have to learn pretty quickly.
Analysis:
This conversations that my friend and I have had over the past couple
months include a great deal of listening on my part. Our conversations
included all the steps of the listening process described in our textbook.
First off, I had to receive the message she was sending. During this stage, I
made sure all of my focus was on her. I also had to look for feedback cues
from her. I knew she had a lot of talking to do and her emotions were very
sensitive at the time. I had to watch for cues from her as to when she wanted
to hear what I had to say. During our conversation I also had to make sure
that my attention was on her and not the dog walking across the street.
Distractions would only make her think that I wasnt interested in what she
was saying.
In the next step, I had to understand the points she was making. I have
never been in the situation myself, so I had to put myself in her shoes in
order to be a better listener. I avoided judging her for what she did or the
rash assumptions she was making in the moment. I had to understand that
she was in a whole new predicament that she has also never experienced
before. If I was ever unclear of what she was telling me, I would ask her
questions or try to paraphrase so I could better understand where she was
coming from.
In the third step of remembering, I had to retain the information she was
telling me and be aware of the information and facts. It was critical for me to
focus my attention on the central ideas of what she was saying. It also
benefited me in order to organize the information she was telling me into
groups. This included the information about her doctors appointments, her
situation with the babys father, and what her thoughts are towards what she
wanted to do with the baby. If I repeated the key ideas over to myself in my
head, I was able to better understand and remember the information. There
was a lot of information being shared in those first couple conversations, so
remembering what she was saying was a vital part of keeping the
conversations flowing and well executed.
The fourth stage was execution. In this stage I had to make sure that I had all
of the information I needed before I started to evaluate or make any sort of
judgments toward the situation. I know my friend has the best intentions and
she is one of the nicest people I know. I had to keep that in the back of my
mind when I was evaluating the conversation and the situation. When she
started talking about the option of abortion, to make sure I understood her
feelings toward it, I made sure to ask the important questions that would not
make her angry or upset. I also had to weigh the facts over my own personal
feelings about the situation. There are so many things that go into the
decision and I couldnt let my emotions get ahead of myself and the
evaluation.
The last step in the listening process was actually responding. The best thing
I could do for her at the time was to be supportive. She was in a sensitive
situation and needed her friend there by her side to support her. I had to
make sure I expressed my support towards her while also being honest. A
good listener is someone who understands and doesnt make any judgments
but a good friend also will be honest. Both my friend and I deserved to have
my feelings. She knew I was going to be 100% supportive of any decisions
she would make, but also aware of what I thought.
So What?
After going back and applying the listening process to these conversations, it
make me realize a few things. I realized how important listening is and all the
subtle rules that go into a conversation, especially a sensitive conversation
as this. When the speaker is in a vulnerable situation, the listener has a lot of
impact on the speakers feelings. Ignoring them, judging them, or bias
opinions could really affect a person in a negative way. This analysis really
puts into perspective how important communication is. It is a crazy aspect of
human interaction. It has a huge impact on peoples feelings and actions.
Artifact Information: Fifteen, by Taylor Swift
Date: 8/30/2009
Related Chapter: Chapter 3: The Self and Perception

Description:
This song is one of the older Taylor Swift songs. In the song, she discusses
how self perception is so much different when you are fifteen. In the song the
girl is just starting high school. The lyrics describe how differently a fifteen
year old understands themselves comparted to someone a few years older.
These are the awkward years where a girl is trying to figure out who she is
and the perception she has of herself.
Analysis:
The first connection I found with this song and chapter 3 was the idea that
people, especially a young girl, has a desire to seek out nourishing people in
their lives. In this song, Taylor finds one of her best friends just sitting in
class.High school can be rough sometimes, and just finding someone who
understands her, can laugh with her, and has similar interests can really
increase someones self esteem.
The next connection could be the fact that in the song, Taylor really does
have an unknown self. She is in high school and hasnt discovered who she
is yet. She is trying new things, forming new relationships, and is completely
aware of who she will be. The line, wish you could go back and tell yourself
what you know now, is a sign that Taylor now knows that she didnt
understand who she was or what she wanted to be back then.
The third connection between this chapter and the song is how gender is
played out. In the song, Taylor is the typical freshman girl. As she walks in
the school, she admires the senior boys and wishes one of them would
acknowledge her. She also has her first love during her freshman year of high
school. Even though she is just fifteen years old, she falls hard for this boy. It
is the stereotype that girls will fall hard fast and show their emotions more
than guys would. One might also say that she is taking a relationship risk by
falling for this guy so fast and thinking this will be a long term relationship.
She is risking having her heart broken. In this song, Taylor is displaying the
typical qualities of a gushy girl.
So What?
By analyzing this song, it was made clear to me how much self-perception
can impact a person. In this song, it wasnt necessarily a bad thing. She was
having fun and enjoying herself even though she still hadnt figured out who
she was. This is a positive thing that can come out of self perception. Of
course there is the opposing side as well. This song could have gone in the
other direction and the social aspect of high school could have made her feel
bad for herself and set her back.
Artifact:

Fifteen by Taylor Swift (lyrics

You take a deep breath and you walk through the doors
It's the morning of your very first day
You say hi to your friends you ain't seen in a while
Try and stay out of everybody's way

It's your freshman year and you're gonna be here

For the next four years in this town
Hoping one of those senior boys will wink at you and say
"You know, I haven't seen you around before"

'Cause when you're fifteen and somebody tells you they love you
You're gonna believe them
And when you're fifteen feeling like there's nothing to figure out but
count to ten, take it in
This is life before you know who you're gonna be
Fifteen

You sit in class next to redheaded Abigail

And soon enough you're best friends
Laughing at the other girls who think they're so cool
We'll be outta here as soon as we can

And then you're on your very first date and he's got a car
And you feeling like flying
And your mama's waiting up and you're thinking he's the one
And you're dancing 'round your room when the night ends
When the night ends
'Cause when you're fifteen and somebody tells you they love you
You're gonna believe them
And when you're fifteen and your first kiss
Makes your head spin around
But in your life you'll do things greater than
Dating the boy on the football team
I didn't know it at fifteen

When all you wanted was to be wanted

I wish you could go back and tell yourself what you know now

Back then I swore I was gonna marry him someday

But I realized some bigger dreams of mine
Abigail gave everything she had to a boy who changed his mind
We both cried

'Cause when you're fifteen and somebody tells you they love you
You're gonna believe them
And when you're fifteen, don't forget to love before you fall
I've found time can heal most anything
And you just might find who you're supposed to be
I didn't know who I was supposed to be
Fifteen

la la la la la
Your very first day
Take a deep breath girl
Take a deep breath as you walk through the doors
Artifact Information: Television show, New Girl
Date: 2011-Present
Related Chapter: Chapter 9: Friends, Lovers, and Families

Description:
This show surrounds around a group of friends who live together in a loft.
They display the different types of friendship displayed. They disagree on
things but in the end they always stick together.
Analysis:
The definition of friendship has three components. The characters in this
show display each of the components of friendships.
The first component is that friendship is an interpersonal relationship. In the
show, Jess, Nick, Winston, and Schmitt are all very different and unique
individuals that bring different things to the table. Together, they react to
each other as unique, genuine, and irreplaceable individuals.
The second component of friendship is that they must be mutually
productive and not destructive. As with every show, they create arguments
and drama with the friends, but by the end of the episode, they come
together as friends. In the apartment, each of the roommates is supportive of
each other. They all support Jess with her teaching. When she got fired, they
all consoled her and supported her decisions. They supported Nick with his
writing, In one episode, they supported Winston when he was trying to get
the girl he liked. And finally, with Schmitt, they are all supportive of him with
his weight loss motivation.
The third component to friendship is that they are characterized by mutual
positive regard. They all must have a liking towards each other which
includes trust, emotional support, and sharing of interests. All four of these
people are living together, and it works out pretty well. They have similar
interests of having fun, supporting each other and providing emotional
support for each other when one of them goes through a hard break up.
So What?
After analyzing the friendships in this show, it is easy to see how friendships
are vital and how many aspects go into a friendship. Friendships must
include support for each other, a mutual liking, no destructive behavior, and
these people must react to each other as complete persons. By giving these
aspects a real life situation, it helps to understand how a successful
friendship works and the aspects that go into it to make it successful.

Artifact Information: Extra Gum: The Story of Sarah & Juan

Date: 10/7/2015
Related Chapter: Chapter 6: Nonverbal Messages

Description: This commercial was released in late 2015. There are no words
in the commercial, only the song, Cant Help Falling in Love. Throughout
the commercial you see Sara and Juan when they first saw each other from
across campus all the way to them growing up and moving in together. In
each of the scenes, Sara offers Juan a piece of gum. He accepts it, and you
can see him doodling on the wrapper afterwards. In the last scene, Sara
walks into this art gallery studio, and along the walls are the pictures Juan
has drawn on the gum wrappers. It turns out he drew him and Sara on each
of their dates where she gave him the gum. The last wrapper has Juan
proposing to Sara.
Analysis:
The chapter of our book that I drew the most connection to this commercial
is the chapter concerning nonverbal language. Throughout the commercial,
no words are spoken. All you can see is facial expressions, body movements,
etc. And this commercial still turns out to be an emotional tear jerker.
The first element is their facial expressions. Throughout the commercial,
even though no words are spoken, it is clear that they are in love with each
other. When she falls asleep he gazes at her with such wonder in his eyes.
Also, whenever they interact with each other, they are always smiling or
laughing. Overall, just the way they look at each other, one can tell how in
love they are.
The next element is body language. In each of the scenes, they are always
hugging or holding hands. When they are skyping, she reaches out her hand
to touch the computer screen, nonverbally showing how much she misses his
presence. Then of course there is the offering of the gum. At the end of the
date, whether it is good or bad, she always reaches her hand out to offer him
a piece of gum. It was always a sense of closure and became a nonverbal
tradition throughout the commercial.
So what?
After analyzing this commercial, it was even easier to see how big of an
impact nonverbal communication can have. Throughout the commercial, not
once did we see the two communicate with words. They were always
laughing, running, smiling, kissing, etc. Without words the audience could
still see how in love they are. That only proves how powerful nonverbal
communication is. The powerful, nonverbal communication of this
commercial brought thousands of their audience members to tears.
Artifact Information: 13 Going on 30 (Suddenly 30 group meeting
presentation)
Date: 4/23/2004
Related Chapter: Chapter 10: Small Group Communication
Description:
In this scene, Jenna is making her presentation to a group of people at her
work. (She works at a magazine company.) Her presentation follows her old
best friend who did not please the audience. Jennas presentation is
heartwarming and gives the people in the magazine a voice and a
personality. The reactions of the audience reassure her that she did a great
job.
Analysis:
I related this scene of the movie to this chapter because I thought this scene
did a great job of expressing a couple of the small group communication
ideas. First off, this staff meeting includes all of the following; it is a collection
of individuals, they all have a common purpose, every group member has
some sort of impact on the others, there is organizational structure to the
meeting, and each member is a part of something bigger. These people are
all coming together to find a new campaign for their magazine. If one person
does not agree with the campaign, it will throw the rest of them off and that
makes every person an important piece of the group.
The members of the group were clearly in awe of Jennas presentation with
their mouths open, their eyes staring in awe, and reassuring smiles on their
faces. At the end, they even all get up and applaud Jennas idea and
presentation. This would be an essential part of any type of group
communication. Group members need to be able to understand, listen, and
give back channeling cues to the person who is speaking.
So what?
After analyzing this small group scene in this movie, it is clear how important
small group dynamics are. Even though Jenna was the only one who was
talking in this scene, the group dynamic is still very relevant. The group
members need to be able to support each other in order to be successful.
Because the group members were so supportive and willing to listen to
Jennas ideas, it made the overall dynamic much better.