Of Course You Can Date A Co-Worker!

Here's How | Liz Ryan | Pulse | LinkedIn Page 1 of 4

Illustration and story by Liz Ryan. Happy Valentine's Day!

Of Course You Can Date A Co-Worker!

Here's How
Publicado el 14 de febrero de 2017

Liz Ryan Siguiendo

429 57 159
Principal at Ask Liz Ryan, a Career Guidance and People Str

Dear Liz,

I have a major crush on my teammate Alex and he knows it. He has a crush on me too.
It's obvious. We went out to lunch together last week and he said "You are so smart and
so awesome as a person, I really like hanging out with you. I've been looking forward to
this lunch all week."

I said "You are my favorite person in our office!"

Then both of us chickened out. Alex looked like he wanted to say something else so
badly, but he didn't. I think he didn't want to put me in an awkward position.

We walked back to the office barely talking. I felt like an idiot when I thought about it
because if Alex and I are supposed to be a couple, then why don't we just go for it and
let the chips fall where they may?

https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/course-you-can-date-co-worker-heres-how-liz-ryan?trk=v... 2/24/2017
Of Course You Can Date A Co-Worker! Here's How | Liz Ryan | Pulse | LinkedIn Page 2 of 4

If I have to change jobs or he has to change jobs because we are dating, so what?

We can get new jobs. I've been avoiding Alex since our lunch but he texted me early
this morning and said "Let's talk about it." I know what he means.

What do you think?

Thanks,

Erica

Dear Erica,

I think the old advice "Don't ever

date a co-worker" is woefully
out of step with the modern
world. Of course you can date a
co-worker.

As you say, if things heat up

between you and Alex then one
of you might have to job-hunt.

If Alex is the guy for you, it will

be worth it!

Which is a better move: keeping the job you have now even if it means telling the man
of your dreams "Sorry, Charlie, my job means more to me than you do" or paying
attention when Mother Nature says "Here is a guy you should know!"

I met my husband at work in 1984. I was the HR Manager so I knew that if anything
serious developed it might shift my life around -- but isn't shifting exactly what a life is
supposed to do?

Now we've been married 25 years and have five kids. Should I have put my job on a
higher plane than my personal life when the signals said "This guy is a cool guy"?

Would that have been a more prudent decision than the one I made? What would that
decision have gained me?

Jobs are just jobs. Love is what makes the world go around!

How ridiculous it would be to ignore what your heart wants because you're afraid to
disrupt your life even a little -- especially for such a good cause!

Jobs come and go. Awesome people like you and Alex do not come and go. You can
date him -- just step into the relationship with your eyes open.

https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/course-you-can-date-co-worker-heres-how-liz-ryan?trk=v... 2/24/2017
Of Course You Can Date A Co-Worker! Here's How | Liz Ryan | Pulse | LinkedIn Page 3 of 4

If you two turn into an item (which you may already be) don't be obnoxious about it.
Don't shove your relationship in anyone's face through public displays of affection or,
on the other extreme, studiously pretend that you barely know one another when the
whole team knows better.

At the right time, walk together into your manager's office and say briskly "Hi Sarah,
don't mean to take up much of your time but we wanted you to know that we are a
couple.

"You'll let us know what changes if any you want to make as a consequence of that."

Boom! Your speech can be short and sweet. Sarah won't want to drag it out any more
than you will.

Workplace romance is one of the stickiest conversational topics there is (short of actual
sex at work, which goes off the Stickiness Meter entirely). We shall not even talk about
that!

All the best to you and Alex -- we are rooting for you!

Yours,

Liz

Check out Liz Ryan's

new book Reinvention
Roadmap here!

Break the rules to get the job you

want -- and career you deserve!

Denunciar esto

Liz Ryan
Principal at Ask Liz Ryan, a Career Guidance and People Strategy Firm Siguiendo

https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/course-you-can-date-co-worker-heres-how-liz-ryan?trk=v... 2/24/2017
Of Course You Can Date A Co-Worker! Here's How | Liz Ryan | Pulse | LinkedIn Page 4 of 4

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Hreg Gatz 1d
Research Analyst at Foreign Species Interaction Commission
Truly advice that every
professional needs to hear! I wish I had seen this about two years ago. My
now-sweetheart-then-obsession was an intern working in the decryption department
of the FSICs forensics lab while I was operating a forklift in the basement
storage unit. Man, I felt like a loser, Id never be good enough for her. But
Ver
one day she had to retrieve a cipher scro ms
Recomendar Responder

Gerno Harms 2d
Customer Service Representative at Openmatics
still, we are human, no
robots.
Recomendar Responder 1

Hay 55 comentarios ms.Mostrar ms

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