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 THE LADY established 1885 No 64193 THIS WEEK

37

28

CONTENTS
Features
12 Jacqueline Bisset exclusive
interview Now 72, Jacqueline
Bisset reveals how she has
63
maintained her movie-star
looks without plastic surgery
16 How to Become a Beauty Queen
Maureen Paton meets the current
Miss Great Britain and asks if the
beauty contest is set for a comeback
22 King (Kong) Tom Making the 29
new Kong movie was thrilling,
but what does Tom Hiddleston
make of monsters in real life?

Regulars
6 The Lady Loves A selection
of our favourite things
8 Briefing 64 Musical and Theatre
10 Letters and The Lady & I 66 TV and Radio 50
21 MARY FROM GOGGLEBOX 77 The Ladygram
Her Indoors Mary believes old 78 Spot the Difference
furniture still has a purpose 80 Cryptic Crossword and Bridge
21 Him Indoors Ivo makes a bid 81 Quick Crossword and Sudoku
for freedom 82 First Impressions Deborah Meaden
24 The Diary of Miss Darcy Bustle
The life of The Ladys office dog
24 Social Medea Spring/summer
27 Jane Green: A Novel Idea Jane
goes to a jazz club and regrets it style special
32 Lady Loves Mothers Day Special 28 Fashion Feminine Florals
41 Globetrotter Treats for Mother 34 In Praise of the Humble Coat
44 The Lady Guide to Modern Hanger Three cheers for the
Manners with Thomas Blaikie unsung hero that protects our
46 House Natural Style precious clothes from ruin
48 Home Help Hugh St Clair
37 Dress For Your Age & Shape
answers your interiors questions
Dressing well no matter 16
49 Antiques with Fiona Shoop
what your age is easy if
49 Horoscopes by Victor Olliver
you have the know-how
50 Food Just Good Food
53 The Lady Archive Recipes Next week: Bladder and
One from 1957: Stuffed Apples bowel health awareness
54 Gardening Spring Gardening
Tips from the RHS
56 Him off the Farm Classifieds
with Robin Page Holiday lets, positions vacant and
59 Fitness & Wellbeing much more. From page 68
with Diana Moran
59 Tech Doc Miles Waghorn shows Subscriptions
you how to get your favourite Subscribe to The Lady and receive
television shows on demand a luxury Landon Tyler fragrance
60 Books and Film diffuser and candle. Page 57

17 MARCH 2017 THE LADY 3

Contents Mar17 v2.indd 3 13/03/2017 20:32

 It survived the Middle
Ages, Henry VIII and
two world wars.
How would it cope with
death watch beetle?
AFTER HUNDREDS OF YEARS IN EXISTENCE, many of the UKs most cherished historic churches and chapels find
themselves threatened by their most dangerous enemies yet; leaking roofs, crumbling stonework and timbers under siege from
death watch beetle. As a Friend of the National Churches Trust you can help us restore churches in
every sense of the word. YOUR ANNUAL SUBSCRIPTION goes towards not just urgent repairs
but vital improvements. Installing modern facilities like kitchens and toilets. Doing everything to enable
these precious buildings to remain at the heart of local communities. PLEASE JOIN TODAY for just
30 per year via direct debit at www.nationalchurchestrust.org/friends, call 020 7222 0605, or
send a cheque for 35 by completing the coupon and returning it to the National Churches Trust,
7 Tufton Street, London SW1P 3QB (please affix a stamp). You will enjoy events and special offers and join a
growing community helping the nations rich heritage of churches and chapels survive for future generations.

FREE BOOK! New Friends receive a free copy of The Church Triumphant, a hardback collection of watercolours of beautiful churches.

I enclose a cheque for 35, payable to the National Churches Trust. TL 3-17
Forename Surname
Address
Postcode

Your information will be treated as private and kept securely. The National Churches Trust will never make public or sell your details to anyone else. As a Friend we will
write to you around four times per year in the form of two newsletters, our annual review and invitations to events. If you would rather NOT hear from us, please tick this box:
Registered Charity Number: 1119845

Untitled-3 4 10/03/2017 12:31

 EDITORS LETTER

Dear Readers,
For any of us whose first experience of television
was pre-remote control, the annual Miss
Great Britain contests were a family treat. The
contestants sashaying down the catwalk in
evening gowns and swimsuits were, for a starry-
eyed little girl, the very epitome of glamour.
39-40 BEDFORD STREET But political correctness took its toll. It wasnt enough to say
LONDON WC2E 9ER
you wanted world peace while wearing 5-inch silver stilettos,
Subscriptions (all calls charged at you actually had to give us world peace. However, like its old
local rates): 01795-414888
stablemate Come Dancing, the Miss GB
subscriptions@lady.co.uk
Classified advertising: 020-7379 4717 contest is poised to have a makeover. Anna Harvey suggests
Main switchboard: 020-7379 4717
The current Miss Great Britain, Ursula
Fax: 020-7836 3601 how we might dress for
editors@lady.co.uk Carlton, is a clever young Scottish
USA Subscriptions:
tel USA toll-free: 800 428 3003
woman who attended the Brit Awards our age and shape
in her sash and who works to encourage
Editor Sam Taylor young girls to be whatever they want to be. And why not?
Editors PA and Letters
In my case, I would rather be the same size I was at 25 but its
Gillian Spickernell
Staff writer Melonie Clarke not really going to happen, which is why I was so captivated by
Books editor Juanita Coulson how Anna Harveys style piece advises how we might dress for
Cartoons editor Richard Ingrams our age and shape. I suspect that our cover star, Jaqueline Bisset,
Editorial assistant Georgia Toffolo
probably does wear the clothes she wore 50 years ago, but then she
Creative director Lorna Wilson
Deputy art director Lee Southey also wears her wrinkles. She looks remarkable for a 72-year-old and
Picture editor Jo Walker its heartening to know that she doesnt believe in plastic surgery
Chief sub editor Gill Moore or Botox. She does, however, believe in eating well and allowing
With thanks to Stirling Attfield, herself the odd treat, like our delicious-looking Archive recipe for
Vicky Coulthard, Katy Georgiou,
stuffed apples. What could be finer?
Lewis Lyons, Victoria Richards
Head of sales Andrea Taylor Until next week, best wishes
Classified sales manager
Heath Lampkin
Head of advertising production
Kath Hanley
Advertising production designer
Justin Harrison
Head of marketing Nicolas Boize Sam Taylor, Editor
Circulation office manager
Nadine Rooke
IT manager Gian Luca Vitali
Managing director Helen Robinson
Publisher and Chief Executive
Ben Budworth

Cover: Jacqueline Bisset Whats new on lady.co.uk

WIN: Tickets to celebrate the
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first anniversary of The Comedy

About A Bank Robbery
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17 MARCH 2017 THE LADY 5

EdsLetter Mar17 v2.indd 5 14/03/2017 10:27



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6 THE LADY 17 MARCH 2017

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17 MARCH 2017 THE LADY 7

LadyLoves Mar17 v2.indd 7 13/03/2017 13:49

 THE LADY BRIEFING
Our pick of the weeks colourful news and views
ST PATRICKS DAY
Marty Burns took on the title role for a re-enactment of the first
landing of Saint Patrick on Irish shores in Downpatrick, Northern
Ireland, in 432. St Patricks Day on 17 March has been a Christian
feast day since the early 17th century and celebrates the patron
saint of Ireland, the arrival of Christianity and Irish culture.
RHS TICKET WINNERS AND
CORNWALL HOLIDAY WINNER
Thank you to everyone who entered
our competitions to win a holiday in
Cornwall and tickets to RHS flower
shows. The winner of the holiday
is Nicola Phipps from Warrington.
RHS tickets go to Wendy Ashworth
from Lightwater, Susan Scheimann
from Hemel Hempstead, Val
Winter from Consett, Maria
Ellis from Welling and Ian
Wright from Sheffield.
Danger for our wildflowers
Hogweed and nettles are killing our
countrysides wildflowers as a result
of nitrogen pumped out by diesel cars.
More than a third of plants struggle in
nitrogen-rich soils, and plants that need
less nutrient-rich soil, like blue harebell
and birds-foot trefoil, are now at risk.
8 THE LADY 17 MARCH 2017
Briefing_17 Mar v2 pg8 .indd 8
BBC LOSES A GOOD
PRAISE WEEK FOR
Songs of Praise will
now be produced by
two independent
companies as part
of the BBCs drive
to become more
commercial. The
show, with Avanti
Media and Nine
Lives at the helm, COLOURED GEMSTONES
will be shown on Diamonds might not be
the BBC but the forever as couples are opting
format may differ. for emeralds, sapphires, and
rubies for engagement rings.
Spending two months salary
on a ring (2,000-3,000) is
also a thing of the past with
the average now being 575.
A BAD
WEEK FOR
STATISTIC OF THE WEEK
66%
BRIDGES
Thousands of our bridges
are badly maintained and
Two-thirds of British at risk of collapse, with over
mums say they are 3,000 not even fit to carry
more productive the heaviest lorries. Devon
since having children, has the most at-risk bridges
according to a study (2,689), followed by Somerset
by TG Escapes. (1,459) and Essex (1,567).
Gluten-free risks
Gluten-free diets may be
leading to an increase in
the risk of type 2 diabetes.
Those who reject gluten
despite not having an
intolerance could be
missing out on fibre and
nutrients that protect
NO MORE FLAT-PACK against diabetes, a study
NIGHTMARES from Harvard School
Assembling flat-pack furniture can test any of Public Health in the
relationship, but it may soon be a worry of the USA has revealed.
past as Ikea is launching a new type of flat pack.
The new designs can simply click together
without the need for screws, with items being
assembled in minutes. The first click design is
the Lisabo table, with more lines to come.
13/03/2017 19:51

FLORAL FANTASTIC
Spring is certainly here, it would appear, as seasonal flowers such as crocuses are popping
up across the country. A fabulous display of about 100,000 blooms appeared at Wallington
Hall near Morpeth and at RHS Wisley in Surrey (above).
NEW INSIGHT
Tests on three pairs of
spectacles owned by Jane
Austen reveal the authors
eyesight grew worse as she
GETTY MAGES; SOLO SYNDICATION;ISTOCK
aged and she was almost
completely blind by the end
of her life. The blindness,
it is thought, could have
been caused by arsenic
poisoning. Arsenic was
found in water supplies and
medicines, and Jane Austen
may have ingested large
amounts through her
rheumatism medication.
Briefing_17 Mar v2 pg9 .indd 9
A MODERN-DAY
ITALIAN JOB
Some 48 years after The
Italian Job, Mini and classic
car owners are invited to
take part in a 1,500-mile
driving holiday to buy
Varietys Sunshine Coaches
for sick and disadvantaged
children. Its open to all UK
drivers of vehicles featured
in the film and starts in the
Italian motoring town of
Imola on 27 October. For
details, call 01273-418100 or
email gsg@italianjob.com
CLOSING COOPERS Child-friendly
One of Englands two churches rival
remaining coopers is to close A Church of England court
his doors after 57 years of has said churches must do
barrel-making. When Lee more to welcome children.
Skinner retires there will be The comments come after it
only one master cooper left. allowed a vicar to lay carpet
Mr Skinner, 72, founded in a Victorian church. The
his cooperage in Bootle, Victorian Society opposed
Merseyside, in 1973 and the carpet at St Lawrences
employed six men, but today Church in Barton, but
its just him. He repairs old Chancellor John
barrels and makes props for Bullimore said
films, but demand has been measures
declining, meaning he hasnt to make
taken on an apprentice. churches
child-friendly
were much
needed.
Contagious itching
That itchy feeling is
contagious, according to a
study that has revealed our
brains are wired to
scratch when we see
others scratching.
Social itching is
triggered by a brain
circuit, but a chemical
THE KEY TO ARTIFICIAL LIFE can turn the circuit off.
Scientists have created a yeast from man-made DNA Mice were shown a video
that may be the key to artificial life. The yeast can be of a mouse scratching
used to create biofuel and bread, and because it has and so followed suit,
human genes, it could also help prevent genetic diseases but when they were
such as cystic fibrosis. Researchers say it is a milestone given the chemical
in the race to create a fully artificial living organism. GRP, they stopped.
17 MARCH 2017 THE LADY 9
13/03/2017 19:52
 LETTERS
BACK OF MY MIND
I was amused to read
the letter about a schools
concern with flat feet
after the Second World
War (Letters, Feet First,
3 March issue).
When I was at boarding
school, at the start of each
term our deportment,
height and weight were
noted. This was done in
the gymnasium by the
sports teacher, with
matron in attendance.
I was deemed to have
a hollow back.
The remedy for this,
according to our sports
teacher Miss Gross (yes,
that was her real name),
was to hang upside down
on the wall bars for five
minutes every week. I did
not enjoy this and tried to
avoid the gym at all costs.
However, after two terms
I was cured.
I am now 72 years old
and still avoid gyms!
Susie Dean, Poole, Dorset
RADIO HEAD
I really identified with
Jane Green and her
realisation that todays
pop music was passing
Pet of the week
Do you have a special pet? Send a picture (and their name,
age and likes and dislikes) along with your name to the
address or email printed opposite, and they could star here.
10 THE LADY 17 MARCH 2017
Letters Mar17 v2.indd 10
her by (A Novel Idea,
24 February issue).
I remember buying
my first transistor radio.
It cost 10 shillings and
sixpence and was small
enough to be concealed
under the bedclothes for
late-night listening to
pirate radio stations.
These days my night-
time listening is more
likely to be Radio 4 Extra
or a soothing talking book,
but I still have the hits of
the 1960s and 1970s on
my iPhone to sing along
to as I walk the dog.
Rosamund Bracewell-Jupe,
Fleet, Hampshire
TERMS & CONDITIONS
While reading about the
covenants applying to a
readers home (Letters,
Rules are Rules, 3 March
issue), I recalled the lease
on a 1950s flat I lived in
during the 1980s.
My lease stipulated
that I was forbidden from
playing the pianola after
9pm and that I was not to
have an erection in the
garden (meaning a coal
shed, I hope). I managed
to comply with both
stipulations. I remember
that the ground rent was
12 per annum, payable
in two instalments.
Those were the days.
Mary Scanlan,
Penge, London
Name Manuka
Breed British Blue
Age 3 years
Owners Trudy and John
Christiansen
Likes Treats and
tummy tickles
Dislikes Squirrels
LETTER OF THE WEEK
FELIX SWUNG IT FOR ME
The cover photograph of the
cheeky cat controller Felix
(24 February issue) caught
my eye, and so I bought my
first copy of The Lady.
I love to read stories about
animals and so I turned
straight to the article entitled
Miaow I help you?! It warmed
THIS WEEKS PRIZE my heart to read about this
The writer of our letter little cat, Felix the senior
of the week will win pest controller, who won the
a delightful silver-plated hearts of passengers and staff
jam pot and spoon at Huddersfield train station.
featuring a pheasant We can learn so much from
decoration on the lid, our furry friends about life
from At Home in the and love because they are
Country. Its the perfect such good teachers.
way to serve jam or Felix is a real character and
chutney and will make evidently very friendly and
a beautiful addition confident (having been much
to the dining table. loved by the station staff), and
Details: 01484-865359, is clearly bringing a lot of joy
www.athomeinthe to so many who meet her.
country.co.uk I loved reading about some
of her adventures and antics,
and her funny little ways.
Like others, I may just take
a special trip to Huddersfield to
meet Felix. And Ill definitely
be ordering the book, Felix
the Railway Cat.
Sandy Briault,
Chessington, Surrey
MIXED MESSAGES to listen to, and Im not
Does anyone else find at all deaf!
that background music Did Spike Milligan
on television is becoming try to stop this nuisance
more intrusive? Every at some point?
documentary seems to Jacqui Bloxham,
be incapable of being Wolverhampton,
shown without annoying West Midlands
music trying to dominate
the screen. With the
advertisements as
well, the subject matter
becomes overwhelmed.
The recent BBC2
documentary series,
Hospital, which portrayed
the struggle hospitals face
with demand for services,
was a good subject, but the
music drowned out the
surgeons reports and Im not a spider Im a web processor
comments. I found it hard
13/03/2017 13:39

If you have a comment on this weeks issue, would like to share something, or need our help answering a question,
please do write to Letters, The Lady, 39-40 Bedford Street, London WC2E 9ER or email letters@lady.co.uk
SWAN SONG
The dramatic photo
of an adult male swan
chasing his son swan
off the lake where they
live (Briefing, 3 March
issue) in order to get
him to move out of
the family nest
made me think
about the
thorny
subject of
semi-adult offspring
moving on.
Years ago, families
used to live close to one
another and could offer
all kinds of support to
each other, whereas now
it seems young people feel
compelled to move miles
away to go to university
or study abroad.
Recently, I have seen
apprenticeships for young
people being promoted,
which I think is a good
alternative for those who
want to learn a skill but
stay closer to their roots.
Janet Harris,
Northampton
LOST NOT FOUND
May I ask for your help in
tracing the whereabouts
of my long-lost love.
We met when we
both worked at the Army
& Navy Store in Victoria,
London. We were 18 years
old in 1958 and shared
a love of music and live
performances ranging corks) can be used to
from 2is Coffee Bar in make a novel, flexible
Soho to the 100 Club
in Oxford Street.
It is with much regret
that we lost touch, but
she is still on my mind
because she was my first
true love. In the summer
we spent our lunch hours
in St Jamess Park and the edges in place.
every coffee break in the
Army & Navy caf.
She was a gifted pianist
and played the flute like
an angel. It was a far cry
from my tea chest and
broom handle double
Letters Mar17 v3.indd 11
bass, which
I used to play
in skiffle groups!
I hope she reads
this, or someone
who knows her
does and passes
my message
on. Her name
was Mary Dams
and she lived in
the cloisters of
Westminster Abbey.
I have tried to contact
her over the
past 60 years and I think
The Lady magazine is the
publication she reads.
Bobby Bucknell, Oundle,
Northamptonshire
USES FOR CORKS
PART 1
With regard to the letter
about what to do with old
wine and champagne
corks, (Letters, Corked,
3 March issue), I can
recommend making
small bundles of corks
to help those who suffer
from leg cramp in bed.
Placing a few under
the bottom sheet at the
end, so as not to interfere
with the feet, is said to
help. I think they have
aided me anyway.
Jane Lowry, Ipswich,
Suffolk
USES FOR CORKS
PART 2
Corks (not champagne
mount for a collection
of standard size photos.
1. Take a large unused picture
frame (mine is 21in x 30in).
Remove the glass.
2. Cut a piece of thin plywood
or thick card to fit inside the
back of the frame, then glue
3. Cut all the corks to the
YOUR SAY
same length, then cut each better still, use some
one in half to make a pair. stationers fixing pins.
4. Glue the flat sides to Doris Rollinson,
the wood/card, making Bovingdon,
roughly a square. Keep Hertfordshire
glueing these squares
tightly together until the THE LADY reserves
wood/card is completely the right to edit letters as
covered. Leave to dry. necessary. Please provide
5. Attach the photos to the your full name, address and
cork with drawing pins, or telephone number or email.
THE LADY & I
One reader finds a familial link to HM The Queen from
an old issue of The Lady that goes back 50 years
Rather than The Lady & I, this weeks title should really
be The Lady & My Mother-in-Law. Ive been an occasional
reader of The Lady for more than 55 years although in
recent years I have become a regular subscriber.
Having often admired the magazine covers especially
the older, archive ones that are sometimes reproduced
I was surprised to find my mother-in-law had contributed.
When clearing out the house that she and my father-in-
law shared for many years, I came across
a folder of beautiful paintings and special
photos including several that appeared
as front covers. I enclose a favourite
the 7 June 1962 issue (right).
Inside, the caption reads, This weeks
cover, which comes as a foretaste of
Bank Holiday joys, is from a photo by
Daphne Osborne. It shows a boy riding
on a fairground horse.
My mother-in-law, Daphne Osborne,
was an ardent royalist, and the caption
connects Daphnes photo with one of HM The Queen
examining a North American Indian mask all related to
things to do in ones spare time. It seems apt that there
was a link between my mother-in-laws photo and an article
concerning the Queen, given Daphnes love for royalty.
Looking at that cover photo, I notice the boys
Wellington boots, his mac and souwester. He seems to
be having fun, despite the weather. Some things, like
rain and The Lady, are always with us.
Mrs P E Thomas, Keddington, Louth
The writer of The Lady & I the cafetiere is also
wins a stylish glass dishwasher safe. For
cafetiere from Judge details, call 0117-940 0000
Cookware. Made from or visit www.judge
scratch- and thermal cookware.co.uk
shock-resistant borosilicate Send your stories,
glass, the cafetiere is of 350 words, to the
heat-resistant to 180C. usual Bedford Street
Featuring a stainless-steel address (above),
polished lid and plunger, marked The Lady & I.
17 MARCH 2017 THE LADY 11
13/03/2017 15:26
 INTERVIEW
My father didnt want me
to believe in my
Now in her seventies, Jacqueline Bisset doesnt believe that Botox
you maintain your youthful spirit. She tells Barbra Paskin the secret
J
acqueline Bisset sounds
slightly frustrated. Shes
just spent much of the
morning trying to find
someone to f i x her
treadmill. Its old and it needs a new
part, she says I found myself slipping
on it this morning and really thought
I would come a cropper.
She welcomes me into her Beverly
Hills home with a grin that lights up
her face and makes her green eyes
sparkle. Jacqueline looks stunning.
Slim, almost willowy, shes wearing
a long brown shirt over brown leather
trousers that accentuate her dancers
legs. She studied ballet until she was
14 and her balletic posture and
slenderness have remained with her
through the years.
Home is a rustic French-style
farmhouse nestled in a narrow
Beverly Hills canyon. Shes lived here
for more than 40 years and it never
fails to delight. Its my grounding
place. Its so tranquil. I love coming
back to it after Ive been away.
It is very peaceful and its hard
to reconcile the tranquillity with
the knowledge that, beyond the front
gate, heavy traffic is snaking its
With Steve McQueen in Bullitt. Opposite: Jacqueline now and (inset) in the 1960s
12 THE LADY 17 MARCH 2017
JacquelineBissett v2.indd 12
way down the canyon road on to
Sunset Boulevard.
You might expect the house to be
filled with the extravagant art and
sculptures that seem de rigueur in so
many celebrity homes here. But no.
Instead, choice artefacts are displayed
from her varied travels. Taste and
warmth abide.
Jacqueline is unwinding now, just
back from a few months in Europe.
She filmed a movie in Paris, LAmant
Double, for acclaimed director
Franois Ozon. It marks her 80th film
(although she was never credited in
her 1965 screen debut, The Knack
and How to Get It). She was thrilled
to work with Ozon and they
hit it off immediately, aided The way you
by Jacquelines f luent
French, which she learned think affects the
when she was in her
twenties, to the delight of way you look. It
her French mother.
From Paris she flew to comes from inside
L ondon a nd sp ent
Christmas in Rye, East Sussex, with
family and friends. Her face lights up
with the memory. It was wonderful to
be there. My brother arranged it. It
was beautiful, really lovely to spend
time with them all. It was so English
and we had a lovely, cosy Christmas.
She travels so much that shes
become something of a nomad. I like
feeling nomadic, she reflects. I love
that feeling of travelling. Last year,
she was in Morocco and Denmark
filming the upcoming political
thriller Backstabbing for Beginners
with Sir Ben Kingsley. Then she was
in Armenia for a film festival, and
after that Vladivostok in eastern
Russia to accept an award.
But she has remained staunchly
British and loves so much about
England, especially the countryside
and the food. She used to go all out on
scotch eggs (with salad
cream slapped all over
them), bangers and mash
and shepherds pie every
time she arrived in London,
before calming down and
resuming her healthy diet.
Shes eaten well for much of
her life, believing that
looking good on the outside is largely
due to what we put inside us. When
I take care of myself I feel great, she
says simply. Occasionally she has roast
chicken dinner parties, but mostly
shes vegetarian. I steam the vegetables
and theyre delicious that way.
Leaning back on her leopardskin
sofa, Jacqueline shares her thoughts
about health and her efforts to preserve
it and, inevitably, the fading years of
youth. Not to sound too envious, but
Jacqueline, with her incandescent
beauty and a face barely dusted with
make-up, looks a good two decades
younger than her 72 years. Still
alluring, with an added elegance and
grace, she presents an appealing
vision. Its a mingling of the way she
takes care of herself and being blessed
with good genes, although it took her
a long time to accept their worth.
Her father, Max, a doctor, repeatedly
played down her looks, and that led to
13/03/2017 15:31
 SLUG HERE

LOOKS
or plastic surgery will help
of her inner beauty

an inferiority complex about her

physical self. He didnt want me to
believe in my looks too much, she
recalls. He said, Your looks will
go, because everybodys do, and
you must be somebody
substantial underneath.
It gave me a lack of
confidence in my looks.
I didnt assume them.
Not even when
Newsweek called her
the most beautiful
screen actress of our
time? No. I didnt pay
any attention to it at all.
Because I didnt think it
was true. I thought it was
just another bit of press and
it was nice to be on the cover
of the magazine. But I didnt have
the feeling I was beautiful. It was not
what I was about.
Theres a strangely wistful note to
her words, and perhaps a tinge of
regret that she hadnt been able to
accept her beauty at the time. Yet
perhaps because shes never been
hung up on her looks, she doesnt feel
robbed as she gets older. Jacqueline
has always been adamantly opposed
to facial surgery or Botox. Then
again, when she looks as good as
she does, she has less cause for
concern than most of us. Im
pushing her in the hopes of
picking up some inside tips.
So whats her secret to
retaining her beauty and her
spirit of youth?
She ponders the question,
even though she must have
been asked it countless
times before. I try not to be
toxic as a person. Just by the
way I think. The way you
think affects how you look.
Jacqueline believes that
perfecting her inner self
preser ves the outer w

17 MARCH 2017 THE LADY 13

JacquelineBissett v2.indd 13 13/03/2017 15:39

 INTERVIEW
appearance. It comes from inside.
I really do believe it comes from a
mental place. I dont have a beauty
regimen. I just go on the treadmill and
watch what I eat.
We talk about her parents: her
father Max, who was very people-
oriented, a very good listener and
made me very aware of other people,
and her mother Arlette, a lawyer who
fled Nazi-torn Paris on a bicycle during
the Second World War, who was
not people-oriented. Arlette
was very influential on her
daughter, who inherited her
passion for the arts,
especially music and
ballet (Margot Fonteyn
was my heroine). But at
47, Arlette was diagnosed
with a form of multiple
sclerosis. Soon after that,
Jacquelines parents split
up. Her father left but the
actress remained close to him.
When Arlette later dev-
eloped dementia, Jacqueline
became her carer. After commuting
back and forth to England for years,
she moved her mother into her
Beverly Hills home. I would never
have moved her to a nursing home,
Jacqueline says. Shed have just died.
As it was, she became healthier when
she was with me.
It wasnt easy for Jacqueline to
balance her career and relationships
with caring for her mother, but she
did it. It put my life a bit out of kilter
for 40 years, but I got through it.
She has had five long relationships,
each lasting between seven
and 14 years, which is more I didnt have the
than many marriages. Yet
shes chosen not to tie the feeling I was
knot. Most relationships
have been with younger beautiful. Its not
men, but she puts that down
to coincidence. She is what I was about
attracted to men who have
a deep intelligence and a certain look
le regard in their eyes, with a
maturity that belies their age. The
look is what pulls me in. And, of
course, a sense of humour, which
Jacqueline has in spades her
occasional hoots of laughter permeate
our conversation but film makers
dont seem to notice and persist in
approaching her with serious roles.
I ask the inevitable question, is
there a man in her life now? Shes
ready for this and deflects the
question. Im not going to answer that.
I wont talk about my personal life, so
14 THE LADY 17 MARCH 2017
JacquelineBissett v2.indd 14
I turned him down but it might have been fun
smouldering with Sinatra in The Detective
youre not going
to get it out of
me! Her laugh
takes the sting
out of the
words.
Despite any
rumours to the
contrary, she
was never inti-
mate with co-stars
Frank Sinatra (I
turned him down but
it might have been fun if
I hadnt) or Steve McQueen. And
although Marlon Brando seemed
headed in that direction in a London
restaurant one night, she wriggled out
of that one.
She works in a profession that deals
unkindly with older women, but wont
take anything she doesnt consider
viable. I dont want to repeat myself,
she says. Id like to do a bigger role
than those Im mainly offered, but with
Franois Ozon I admired his work and
wanted to work with him. Like when
I worked with Claude
Chabrol [in La Crmonie,
for which she was nominated
for a Csar, the French
equivalent of an Oscar],
I wanted to work with him,
to have that experience.
It wasnt a big part but it was
a very good film.
Shes carved out a career that began
with modelling, after she left school
with fewer A levels than shed have
liked. Growing up in the Berkshire
countryside, shed harboured dreams
of becoming either an architect or a
doctor like her father, but had no real
idea of what she wanted to do. My
Latin teacher told me one day, You
should be an actress, youre such a
chatterbox youd be a great actress.
He said it jokingly but it stuck.
I first interviewed Jacqueline after
she finished 1977s The Deep, in which
her wet, clingy T-shirt launched her
Inset: With Nick Nolte in The Deep
as a sex icon. Shed already smouldered
in The Detective with Frank Sinatra
(1968) and her sensuous performance
opposite Steve McQueen in Bullitt
won her an award for Best Female
New Face in the same year. But it was
The Deep that cemented her rise to
fame and sent her fee skyrocketing.
She evolved into an actress of
substance, and later films afforded
her the depth to explore her acting
chops. The nice thing about getting
older is that your emotions are much
more easily findable. But you also
become more fragile, she says.
Jacqueline is independent; has been
from early on. Opinionated, in an
unthreatening way, she is soft-spoken
but firm. And intense, very intense. It
was her intensity and commitment
that caused the venerable director
John Huston, while on location in
Mexico with Under the Volcano, to tell
me how impressed he was with her in
what was a very complex role. And
Huston was not easily impressed.
Jacqueline is surprised when I tell
her this, but then recalls something
Huston said to his assistant director
at the time. He said, You could take
that girl tiger hunting! That was the
biggest compliment Ive ever been
paid! All because she refused to give
up when they were filming the last
scene in the movie, where she had to
die. It was a hellish scene. It was
pouring with rain and everyone was
huddled under tarpaulins. I was
wearing a thin cotton summer dress
and I had to fall at exactly the right
spot on the ground. It was murderous
trying to get it right. Huston wanted
to give up and call it a night but
I insisted that we remain till we had
it in the can. And we finally got it.
She smiles knowingly as she says,
My motto is one Ive borrowed from
GETTY IMAGES
Winston Churchill and I have applied
it to all areas of my life. He said,
Never, never, never give up. And
I never do.
13/03/2017 15:40
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Untitled-4 15 10/03/2017 12:43

 FEATURE

Left: Carole
Fletcher, Miss
Great Britain
winner, 1966.
Right: Finalists
from 1979

HOW E A
TO BECOM

BEA EN
U T Y QU E
Once attracting TV audiences of 25 million, beauty contests
were compulsory family viewing before falling out of fashion.
Maureen Paton meets the current Miss Great Britain and wonders
if there is hope of a triumphant (modern) return

L
ooking like a fairy-tale princess in her strap-
less gown and sash, Miss Great Britain went
to the pop-music industrys Brits ball
recently to add her patriotic lustre to the
stardust scattered by Beyonc. Until Ursula
Carlton put pretty-woman pageants back on the map
again by making her regal entrance at such a high-profile
event, the quaintly charming beauty-queen business
seemed to have gone the way of video recorders, knobbly-
knees contests and Carry On films.
And yet it very clearly hasnt gone away. Although the
big shows havent been televised on mainstream channels
since the late 1990s after falling foul of politically correct
opposition to the objectification of women, beyond the
small screen they are still thriving out there. Far from
being an anachronism, perhaps their time has come round
again with the return of glamour to womens lives in such
influential retro-trends as vintage fashion. If the future
Amal Clooneys looks could get her named the hottest
woman barrister in London in a 2013 legal poll without
compromising her credentials as a leading human-rights
lawyer, then the old stigma surrounding the concept of
beauty contests seems to be rapidly melting away.
As for the auburn-haired, blue-eyed Ursula, shes a
shrewd 26-year old businesswoman from Nairn in the
Highlands whose royal title provides a handy platform w

16 THE LADY 17 MARCH 2017

MissGreatBritain v2.indd 16 13/03/2017 19:46

 SLUG HERE

The current
The winner holder Ursula
and runners-up
Carlton. Below
from 1957 left: Wearing
the sash of Miss
Aberdeen.
Inset: Being
crowned by the
previous years
winner

17 MARCH 2017 THE LADY 17

MissGreatBritain v2.indd 17 13/03/2017 19:47

 FEATURE
From left: Morecambe & Wise present the 1965 Miss
GB trophy; Sir Bruce Forsyth with his wife, former Miss
World Wilnelia Merced; Miss GB 1981 Michelle Hobson
for her two companies: teaching boxercise fitness classes
to women of all ages, including one in her seventies; and
giving little girls a magical experience with her Belles
And Bows Princess Parties, inspired by her experience
of working as a Disneyland Paris princess.
Making almost as many personal appearances as the
real Queen, she has also started a Big Sister project by
going into schools to talk to girls about empowerment and
dealing with bullying on social media. Its based on my
little sister Emily, who is 14 and who is so proud of me she
wants to be like me when shes older, explains Ursula, whose
ultimate ambition is to be running her own international
interior-design business in 10 years time. To patronise
Ursula as a victim of sexism, then, is rather like doubting
the strength of Wonder Womans muscles.
There was a lot of sexism going on in the The contest shows
1960s and 1970s, she concedes, but now the
contest is about the freedom to be yourself and you can love your
to celebrate what it is to be a woman. Indeed,
despite her pretty face, Ursulas story turns out body with all its
to be a lesson in overcoming the adversity of
physical disadvantage and age discrimination. lovely bubbly bits
Who would have thought it?
Too short at 5ft 4in to be the fashion model that her
mother always said she should be, Ursula instead
set her sights on the beauty-queen business only to
encounter another frustrating setback. Too elderly at 25
to enter Miss England, she applied last year to a Facebook
advertisement for the more age-forgiving Miss Aberdeen,
sending in a full-length, fully clothed photo of herself.
Two months later she won the title and then entered Miss
Great Britain, taking the crown last September in a short-
list of 50 from thousands of entrants. Her latest goal is to
win Miss Tourism World in Spain next month, hoping to
18 THE LADY 17 MARCH 2017
MissGreatBritain v2.indd 18
become the ambassador for
Heritage Britain.
Some girls in the Miss Great
Britain final were a size 14 or 16;
the contest is about celebrating
all shapes and sizes, because
theres no such thing as the perfect
body, she explains. Its about the
freedom to be a woman. In so many
countries that I dont even need to men-
tion, you have to cover your face or your
shoulders, theres not that freedom. But we in
the contest can have our bodies on show. I dont have a
six-pack and Im not 6ft tall; but the contest shows that you
can love your body with all its lovely bubbly bits and scars.
Its a great confidence-booster. Except that, only one face
and body can come first, unfortunately; still, it appears
that theres a lot of fun to be had along the way.
The first-ever beauty contest began in Greek mythol-
ogy with The Judgement Of Paris, a competition between
the three most beautiful goddesses of Mount Olympus
Aphrodite, Hera and Athena with the shepherd prince
Paris of Troy invited to name the fairest of them all. Miss
Great Britain, the UKs oldest pageant, was launched in
1945 at the seaside resort of Morecambe, followed by the
Miss World contest in 1951 as part of the Festival Of
Britain. The names of beauty queens who went
on to become bona fide stars is legion, from
Sophia Loren, Debbie Reynolds, Britney Spears,
and Cheryl Cole to Halle Berry (who once
admitted, I spent a lot of time with a crown
on my head). As a lesson in deportment
alone, you have to admit it must be a jolly
useful experience.
Miss World founder and self-made million-
aire Eric Morley ran the competition for five decades
until his death in 2000, with his ex-model widow Julia
taking over as President. A vertically challenged Cockney
self-publicist with greased-back hair who could have been
played by Michael Palin in a Monty Python sketch, he
also introduced commercial bingo to Britain in 1961 and
created the Come Dancing formula for the BBC to pub-
licise the Mecca dance halls that he managed. It was
Morley himself who presented the Miss World results,
announcing them in reverse order to build up tension as
the girls faced the cameras with retina-dazzling smiles.
13/03/2017 19:47

Eric Morley chats with
the 1955 Miss England
contestants
For years the format included a swimsuit parade, a
much-mocked personality section that seemed to involve
tidal waves of gush about various good causes. The con-
testants would be asked a series of banal questions, which
often resulted in laugh-out-loud answers. Favourites in-
cluded: What is your favourite body part ? (Answer: the
hand, to help people). What is the best thing that has
happened to you? (Answer: appearing in this contest)
What is a beauty queen? (Someone with inner beauty).
There was a finale in evening gowns and sashes
for the crowning. More recently, Miss World
contestants have been set sports and fund- OK, its not
raising charity challenges while trying to solve
world peace and the meaning of life, sometimes Mastermind in
in the same sentence.
Sir Bruce Forsyths wife Wilnelia Merced was a bikini yet, but
the youngest-ever winner of Miss World back
in 1975; invited back in 1980 to be a judge, she its evolving
and fellow judge Bruce fell in love. Perhaps
beauty pageants could be rejuvenated with a similar
makeover to the one that Strictly gave to Come Dancing?
MISS GREAT BRITAIN ARCHIVE; REX; GETTY; TOM WREN
Far from being devised for leering male viewers only,
the major pageants were aimed at a family audience. The
Miss World contest was an annual fixture for me and my
mother when I was growing up in the 1950s and 1960s,
eventually peaking at up to 25 million viewers in the UK
alone. I can still remember the excitement of seeing the
exquisite Reita Faria become the first Asian winner in
1966, a notable breakthrough in those days. And on the
fictional side, who wouldnt root for Sandra Bullock
as the accident-prone FBI agent going undercover at a
beauty pageant in 2000s Miss Congeniality comedy, the
quintessential ugly duckling transformed into the swan
we would all secretly like to be?
To object to such an apparently harmless entertain-
ment invites the charge of being a spoilsport. Ever since
MissGreatBritain v2.indd 19
SLUG HERE
the first Womens Liberation protest in 1970 that
disrupted the Miss World contest with flour-bombs and
made comedian Bob Hope flee the stage, feminists have
claimed that such contests are degrading to women
by judging them on appearance. But no one forces con-
testants to do it; they enjoy the limelight, the boost to
their confidence and the chance to parade in swimwear
we asked for their feedback on that. We have modernised
the brand so much, argues Kate Solomons. She took over
as National Director of Miss Great Britain in 2012, allow-
ing married women and mothers to enter the
contest for the first time, introducing personal-
ity rounds to judge charm and stage presence
and ensuring a 50-50 male-female judging
panel made up of industry experts, former win-
ners and photographers instead of the all-male
panels of old. OK, its not Mastermind in a
bikini yet, but its evolving.
One newspaper declared two years ago that
the contests provide a kinder, gentler experience than the
brutal exposure of reality TV. Ursula agrees, telling me she
made it clear to the Miss GB organisers that the last thing
I want to do is to pose for some mens magazine or go on a
reality show that kind of sexual environment. I have not
sexualised myself so it hasnt opened up an opportunity for
men to come crawling. My mind is more focused on being a
leader and role model for women or children and teenagers.
Theres even a feminist case to be made for modern
beauty pageants these days. I couldnt agree more with
historian Mary Beard that the girls look a lot healthier
than some of the fashion models that are posing as our
current role models. For the one thing youll never
encounter is an anorexic beauty queen.
u Were you once a beauty queen? Send your stories
and photographs to our Bedford Street address or email
editors@lady.co.uk
17 MARCH 2017 THE LADY 19
13/03/2017 19:47
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Untitled-3 20 10/03/2017 12:37

 OPINION

HER INDOORS by Mary Killen

Mary believes her old furniture can still serve a purpose. But at what cost?

I ve had a lorry-load of furniture it? A Wiltshire furniture dealer tells me the new rich want
driven over from Northern Ireland, to replicate the sort of furniture theyve seen in hotels,
and I can tell by the silence when friends but if he had the storage he would buy up acres of brown
walk into the cottage that theyre not impressed. furniture because its bound to make a comeback. Now
You see, its mainly Victorian-era brown furniture, its here, I couldnt be happier. Giles, however who likes
and therefore inappropriately heavy and dark for to seek out the negative in any situation chose to focus
an already hobbit-like dwelling. on the suspect single mattresses that had made the 600-
Its all worthless of course. Even though mile journey. One of the two mattresses
a scratch-attracting Perspex-and-steel (although about a hundred years old) is
dining table might cost 1,125, my Victorian Why on earth fine-quality quilted horsehair, but the other
mahogany version was valued at 40 by is super-synthetic. My sister speculated
a provincial auctioneers. It seems brown
does no one, that someone must have died on the
furniture has never been more unfashionable. matching good mattress, which
My sisters house was already fully
except me, is why it had been disposed of.
stuffed, and even though it cost 10 times
want Victorian Yet now Ive got a glass-fronted bookcase,
what the furniture is allegedly worth to a roll-top desk, two sideboards, some
heave it over the Irish Sea, its destiny furniture? fragile chairs, and two matching rosewood
otherwise was to go to house clearance. single beds. To me these relics from
The auctioneer would have charged us an the homes of my grandparents and
hourly rate for his men to collect it and shoulder it into great-grandparents signal continuity, if not permanence,
the van, and then a commission. But what swung it was and they confer some of the Victorian virtue of their
that he was unwilling to take many of the items because previous owners on to me.
if they didnt sell, which was likely, then it would be up Meanwhile, the thought of having a drawer for
to us to pay for them to be taken to the dump. everything and everything in its drawer is making me
Victorian furniture was built to last by proper cabinet happy: despite Giless grumble that the cottage was never
makers. So why on earth does no one, except me, want meant to be an obstacle course.

HIM INDOORS by Ivo Dawnay

Armed with 40 words of Spanish and a few clothes, Ivo is running away from home

F or years I have sworn that I will never again spend a and have since fallen by the wayside. An old mate,
grey, miserable February in the UK. For years I have who once travelled with me into the deepest
failed to achieve this and now, once again, it is March. Amazon jungle when in our thirties, now claims
My aim was not merely to escape the drab, grey gloom, the biggest adventure he is prepared to take on is driving
but to give my life-partner (the new name for wives, I note, from Normandy to Rome. What has become of us all?
trendily) what she calls respite more necessary than Abandoned by these chicken-livered creatures, I am
ever this year after my unloved presence in the family challenging myself harder. One of my party pieces is to
home during the daytime. claim that the greatest moment of my life was when
So after a month of dithering, I have finally bitten I arrived in Rio de Janeiro with one suitcase, about 10 hours
the bullet and booked a flight to the sombrero-clogged of Portuguese training in the Tottenham Court Road,
streets of Mexico. and the address of my future secretary on a scrap of paper.
When I announced this exciting news to Mrs D From those humble beginnings, I pompously
over breakfast, she did not whoop and crack open the tell anyone listening, four years of adventures, new friends,
Veuve Clicquot, but after an uncharacteristic moment and exotic experiences grew like a vast tropical plant from
of reflection, declared that maybe she could get a week a very small seed. I now intend to do it again in Mexico
off and join me. As you well know, she said sternly, starting, I hope, at an art school in the colonial city
I cant live with you, but I also cant live without you. of Puebla where I have applied for a residency.
Reasonable as always. The last Skype interview is this coming week, and if
However, when I heard her on the telephone to a friend I make it, by Wednesday I will be winging my way to
saying that she had not yet managed to Taco-land with little more than a few
get me out of the family home in much Down Mexico way clothes, some paints and about
the same way as she attempts to eject our 40 words of Spanish. Crazy, really,
children, I thought it was clearly time especially as the first blossoms are
for her to not live with me for a while. beginning to emerge in the communal
I, after all, pronounce respite to rhyme gardens of West London.
with spite whereas she, more emolliently, Respite of sorts for both of
rhymes it with spit. us, though, whether of the spitty or
ISTOCK

So Mexico it is. At least three flakey spitey kind, we shall have to wait
friends expressed an interest in coming, and see.

17 MARCH 2017 THE LADY 21

HerHim_Indoors_Mar17 v2.indd 21 13/03/2017 15:24

 INTERVIEW

King (Kong)
TOM
Making the new Kong was thrilling, but what does Tom Hiddleston
think of real-life beasts? Susan Griffin finds out from the hesitant star

T
om Hiddleston is proving
hard to pin down. Hes
just been asked whether
he believes creatures
such as the Loch Ness
Monster really exist.
I dont know. What do you think?
he replies, grinning. But the question
is promptly batted back.
I think the reason those myths
exist is that human beings enjoy
feeling there are mysteries that we
dont fully understand, he offers, like
a savvy politician attempting to avoid
a pertinent query.
He laughs when this is brought to
his attention, before adding, Im a
great admirer of nature documentaries,
such as those presented by Sir
David Attenborough. I always learn
something new about extraordinary
I love shooting action because screen combat is like
choreography. The requirements to be precise are high
creatures on the planet I didnt know
about, so I think all those myths play
into the fascination we have with
the natural world.
The actor, whos promoting his new
movie Kong: Skull Island, is evidently
pre-empting headlines such as
Hidders believes in Nessie.
Its perhaps understandable the
36-year-old is a tad cautious these days.
He received something of a mauling
in the press over his brief, three-month
romance with singing superstar Taylor
Swift, including that misjudged I TS
vest that he wore last summer.
Then there was his speech at the
Golden Globes in January, when he
received an award for his performance
in BBC1s The Night Manager.
He later apologised for what he
described as his inelegantly expressed
tribute to the work of Mdecins Sans
Frontieres in South Sudan.
But despite his occasional restrained
responses, Hiddleston is on great
form today.
Ever the charmer, he laughs often
and looks handsome in dark trousers,
and a blue top with rolled-up sleeves.
Its the morning after the London
premiere of Kong: Skull Island and the
actor, who was born in the capital
and studied at Eton College and
Cambridge University, admits, I was
buzzing when I got home.
The action-packed movie, set in
1973 and co-starring Samuel L Jackson,
Brie Larson and John C Reilly,
is a reimagining of the Kong story.
As director Jordan Vogt-Roberts says,
it represents all the mystery and
wonder that still exists in the world.
Hiddleston plays Captain James
Conrad, an ex-SAS black ops officer
invited to join a mission to a remote,
unexplored island in the Pacific.
What they find beggars belief but
it turns out the monstrous ape known
as Kong is the least of their worries.
Its so thrilling, says Hiddleston.
I remember when I was younger,
the image of King Kong on top of the
Empire State Building with the light
planes flying towards him. I dont
ever remember not knowing that
image, in a way.
Its more than 80 years since Kong
first appeared on the big screen,
and Hiddleston has a theory about
the enduring fascination with the
mightiest of apes. Kong embodies
the internal clash between our
civilised selves and the place in
our consciousness that still has
a very real sense of something bigger
than ourselves.
Moving the story from the 1930s
to a more modern setting (at the
tail-end of the Vietnam War) allowed
certain themes to be explored.
Its a world before the tyranny of
global satellites, near total surveillance
and information overload, explains
Hiddleston. We didnt have the
illusion, as we do today, with the
internet and mobile phones and GPS,
that we know everything about the
world we live in. The setting also gave
us an extraordinary prism to explore
what Kong might represent in
a conversation about war, and the

The Night Manager

Thor The Avengers
Kong: Skull Island

22 THE LADY 17 MARCH 2017

TomHiddleston Mar17 v2.indd 22 13/03/2017 13:28

 SLUG HERE

(above).
on g: S kull Island ays
K n has alw
Hiddlesto cla ssic
ered the
rememb (b elo w)
o vie fro m 1933
m

tendency of mankind to destroy what

he doesnt understand.
The role required the actor to
perform a raft of stunts, but despite
his on-screen graft, and experience
in both the Thor and Avengers
superhero franchises, hes reticent to
admit hes a natural action man.
I dont know. Thats not for me to
say! he says, laughing bashfully.
I love shooting action because
stage and screen combat is more like
choreography than anything else.
Youre having not only to physically
execute the moves of the fight, but
youre also working with the camera
so the requirements to be very precise Hiddlestons next
are high, but I enjoy that. project will see
The classically trained actor, who him animated
graduated from RADA in 2005,
embraced the opportunity to play an
adventurer. Conrad seemed like
a character from an old-fashioned,
classic mould, someone who starts warm, generous people, and we all felt Aardman Animations, the same team
off lost. He takes a commission to join privileged to be there with this film that introduced the world to Wallace
an expedition to an unknown land because were there to do a job but we and Gromit, in which hell voice the
and is humbled by what he finds. still had days off and we could go pompous Lord Nooth.
The film looks incredible. Aside exploring. It was really exciting. Im thrilled to be able to breathe
from locations in Hawaii, and along It was widely reported he was going some semblance of life into this
Australias Gold Coast, its the first to be taking a break from movies this hysterical villain Lord Nooth.
feature film to shoot extensively in year. However, when asked if this is Hes larger than life in every respect,
Vietnam. I had actually planned true, he says, Not really. I just had says Hiddleston.
GETTY IMAGES, WARNER BROS

a trip to Vietnam as a student but
never got to go because it was the
same summer I got my first ever
professional acting job. So it was
really nice to go there as an actor,
remarks Hiddleston.
Vietnam is stunning, an absolutely
breathtaking country. Beautiful,
one... I finished Thor: Ragnarok at
the end of October and I just took
some time off before this [press tour]
came up because Id been working
back-to-back for a long time. But Ive
got lots of things Im still finishing.
This includes Early Man, a
prehistoric comedy animation from
Nick Park [the director] is
extraordinary in the way he works,
and the animation of his characters
takes a long time, so we keep meeting
every month or so. I cant wait for
audiences to see it.
u Kong: Skull Island is in cinemas
nationwide now.

17 MARCH 2017 THE LADY 23

TomHiddleston Mar17 v2.indd 23 13/03/2017 13:29

 COLUMN
Miss Darcy Bustle
This morning, I went to the
gardens near my house and
joined the dog yoga group.
Im not sure that yoga is
really for me, but the owners
seemed to have a good time.
They performed star-shape
stretches on the grass while
I ended up flat on my back
with a rather frisky young
pup trying to show me how
to do the downward dog.
Downward dog yoga
Kath has designed and
knitted me a stunning new
coat that is so beautiful
people have stopped me in
the street and taken photos
of it. Two women have asked
SOCIAL MEDEA
24 THE LADY 17 MARCH 2017
DarcysDiary Mar17 v2.indd 24
The Ladys lovable office dog tells all
New coat by
Kath Knits
for the pattern, but there
isnt one because Kath
knitted it freeform she says.
The buttons are little
miniature versions of me
which are so beautiful that
I havent even tried to chew
them. I am dropping hints
to see if she can do me a blue
version. I dont think she has
much on at the moment.
I discovered today that
Duffle has been secretly
going out for brunch while
I go to work. Hes supposed
to go to work as well, in the
gallery, with the editors
husband, but they seem
to spend a lot of time not
working in the gallery. This
morning, I stayed at home,
and so they had to take me
along. We were only at work
for a few minutes before we
headed off to a swanky
brasserie called Bellanger
where dogs are not only
welcome but are even given
special biscuits. I wonder if
its too late to swap my
career choices?
Today there was a little tea
party for Dorindas birthday
its a special one that ladies
sometimes dont like to talk
about but in dog years she
would be almost six. There
were cakes and crisps and
probably sausage rolls but
I dont know because I was
banned. The editor said,
after the peanuts last
week, she couldnt risk it.
I promised I wouldnt do
my little starving face and
persuade Andrea to give me
a plate of treats, but she
didnt believe me. As if I
would fib. I will be having
my own birthday party on
Special biscuits from
Bellanger brasserie
25 March (my first) and she
wont be able to ban me from
that, surely? Lyra the
Labrador wrote and said
that for her birthday she was
given a run around on the
beach and a celebration tea
of cooked small cocktail
sausages. I have left her
letter lying around.
Pink-bow
envy
I watched Crufts this week
in the hope of being able to
pick up some tips. I know
that I could never be entered
because my legs are not
perfect enough and I have
sticky-up Mohican hair on
my neck. But I can dream.
And even if I cant enter, I
could at least be given one of
those lovely pink bows that
the judges dont seem to like.
Why should Yorkies have all
the fun?
ISTOCK
u See you next week
Instagram@missdarcybustle
13/03/2017 19:55
Untitled-4 25 10/03/2017 12:46
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Untitled-8 26 13/03/2017 15:15


Jane Green agrees to accompany her husband on an evening out,
discovers a deep dislike of jazz, and finds that her friends feel the same
or all my love of music,
I have never really listened
to jazz. When I was in
my early twenties and
pretending to be cool, I occasionally
ILLUSTRATION: EMMA HOWCUTT. PHOTO: iSTOCK
joined friends at various jazz clubs,
tapping my feet and nodding my
head like I knew what was being
played, as if I was one of the cool
cats. But it has been many years
since I have sat down and really
listened to jazz.
Often, on a Thursday night, my
husband will join friends of ours
at a jazz club, for he says live
music, good food and a few drinks.
I tend not to join him, mostly
because the music doesnt start
JaneGreen_Mar17 v2.indd 27
until after nine, which means I am
almost always tucked up in bed.
Last week I had a book event
on a Thursday night, and I knew it
wasnt going to finish until around
9pm. This meant I would already
be dressed, and in fact (somewhat
miraculously) out, so I agreed to
join my husband at the jazz club.
He spent days preparing me.
The musicians were fantastic, he
said. We happened to have seats
at the best table in the house, he
said. We would meet amazing
people, he said.
In my excitement, I invited
two girlfriends to come and join
us. I didnt ask if they liked jazz;
I presumed they must have done
or they wouldnt have accepted
the invitation. So we arranged to
meet at the club at 9.15pm, for
dinner, drinks and excellent music.
I had a great book event, and was
in the mood for a lively evening.
I walked into the club, and
immediately started bobbing my
head in the way all proper jazz fans
are supposed to do. We pushed
our way through the tables, which
were filled with people far older
than me all nodding their heads,
most with their eyes closed as the
saxophonists notes filled the air. myself in the mood to chat.
We sat down at our table, right
next to the stage, where the music
was very loud and the trombone
COLUMN
My latest jazz
experience hit all
the wrong notes
kept threatening to mix my drink.
Shortly afterwards my friends
arrived, but we couldnt speak
because the music was so loud, and
besides, no one in the room was
speaking anyway. Then Beloved
leaned over, a delighted smile on
his face at having finally got his
wife to join him, and he whispered,
Are you happy? I turned my head
and muttered back in his ear, No.
I hate jazz.
I know, I am a horrible killjoy,
but it struck me at that moment,
as the trombone was playing and
the saxophonist was soaring, that
I really dont like instrumental jazz.
I can get my head around anything
with a great vocalist, because Im
fascinated by people who can sing,
but jazz by itself? A big fat no. Also,
an evening in a jazz club with people
I love but not feeling able to talk to
them all night? Another big fat no.
I leaned over and whispered to
one of my girlfriends that I hated
jazz. Me, too, she replied. I said
the same thing to the other, who
also agreed.
Next week I am sending husband
alone. I shall be tucked up in bed
with a good book, and all my friends
on the end of the phone if I find
u Falling: A Love Story, Jane Greens
new novel, is published by Macmillan,
priced 14.99.
17 MARCH 2017 THE LADY 27
13/03/2017 14:17
 Floral placement
jacket, 159, by
Bruce by Bruce
Oldfield at
John Lewis
Floral necklace,
128, by J. Crew

Dita dress in
Kyoto print,
995, by
Suzannah

Floral midi skirt,

Coralie 49.99, by Zara
suede
sandals,
225, by
LK Bennett

flowers
SAY IT WITH
Digital floral
dream print tee,
32, by Oasis

Bold, blurred or graphic, this seasons blooms

are not for shrinking violets.
By Juanita Coulson

Floral lace-front
blouse, 209, by The
Kooples at Farfetch

Mia red nappa

leather shoulder bag,
225, by LK Bennett

Oriental
blossom
courts, 115,
by Ted Baker

Meelia dress, 179,

Floral silk trousers, by Ted Baker
261, by Marni at The Outnet

28 THE LADY 17 MARCH 2017

Fashion Mar17 v1.indd 28 13/03/2017 13:52

 STYLE

Pemberley solid
Printed stretch-cotton floral bracelet,
trousers, 90 (were 145, by Liberty
205), by Tory Burch at
The Outnet

Silk floral top,

168, by Diane
von Furstenberg
at Harrods

Hartye floral bomber,

179, by Ted Baker

Floral knot-
detail top, 65,
by Karen Millen

Colourful
floral hoop
earrings, 65,
by J. Crew

Pink tourmaline
STOCKISTS Lotus ring, 490,
Dune: 0333-240 7306, by Emma Chapman
www.dunelondon.com Jewels
Emma Chapman Jewels:
07767-406318, www.
emmachapmanjewels.com
Farfetch: 020-3750 1250,
www.farfetch.com Floral wristlet, 65, by Whistles
Harrods: 020-3626 7020,
www.harrods.com
Hobbs: 020-3095 3939, High-neck floral-
www.hobbs.co.uk print crepe dress,
J. Crew: 0808-234 3686, 410 (was 820), by
www.jcrew.com MSGM at Matches
John Lewis: 03456-049049,
www.johnlewis.com
Karen Millen: 020-7629 1901,
www.karenmillen.com
Liberty: 020-7734 1234,
www.libertylondon.com
LK Bennett: 0333-577 9900,
www.lkbennett.com
Matches: 0800-009 4123,
www.matchesfashion.com
Oasis: 020-7240 7445,
www.oasis-stores.com
Suzannah: 020-7258 0782,
www.suzannah.com
Ted Baker: 0345-450 2484, Floral filled shirt,
www.tedbaker.com 38, by Oasis
The Outnet: 0800-011 4250,
www.theoutnet.com Growe embroidered
Warehouse: 020-7519 1662, loafers, 85, by Dune
www.warehouse.co.uk
Whistles: 0330-363 3363,
www.whistles.com Christiana skirt,
Zara: 0800-014 2993, Wisteria wrap dress, 69 (was 139),
www.zara.com 49, by Warehouse by Hobbs

17 MARCH 2017 THE LADY 29

Fashion Mar17 v1.indd 29 13/03/2017 13:53

 Prestat Finest
Chocolates and Truffles
Prestat Finest Chocolates and Truffles, Londons
Greatest Chocolate Shop, established in 1902.
By appointment to Her Majesty The Queen
and previously to Her Majesty Queen Elizabeth
The Queen Mother.
Loved by royalty and nobility, stars of stage
and screen, indeed by anyone who delights in the
pleasure which only the finest chocolate brings.
Adored by Roald Dahl, author of Charlie and
the Chocolate Factory.
Prestats delightful Mothers Day gift bag
bulges with the finest Pink Marc de Champagne
Truffles, Chocolate Hearts hand-dusted and filled
with our award-winning Sea Salt Caramel recipe,
and a wicked Chocolate Lollipop treat, all
presented in a collectable jute bag. All Prestat
Chocolate is Traded Fairly, helping to support
African farmers and their families.
Love your mum because we love ours!
u For information, visit www.prestat.co.uk

To MOTHER
with love
Mark Mothering Sunday on
your calendar for 26 March
and dont forget to lavish the
special lady in your life with
one of these beautiful gifts
Mindful Beauty
from Aromatherapy Associates
Aromatherapy Associates focuses on mindful
beauty and giving yourself time to stop
and find balance in your life. As leaders in
aromatherapy, we address your specific concerns
and take you on a sensory journey to enhance
your wellbeing.
This spring, give love and support to those
you care about with our Support Collection.
Show your gratitude to loved ones and give the
gift of precious me time this Mothers Day.
Our Support Collection is a must-have in
everyones bathroom cabinet. Whether you need
to ward off a cold or hay fever, soothe irritated
skin or balance the effects of hormones, these
special blends offer support when we are faced
with emotional or physical challenges.
u Visit www.aromatherapyassociates.com

30 THE LADY 17 MARCH 2017

MothersDay_advertorialv4.indd 30 13/03/2017 17:09

 ADVERTORIAL

Luxury footwear
Perilla is an online alpaca specialist that
produces a wide range of alpaca socks for every
occasion. Over four tonnes of the finest alpaca
yarn is imported from Peru annually, and this
yarn is dyed in Scotland and knitted in the
North of England. All socks have hand-linked
toe seams, making them flat and comfortable
to wear. There are 10 ranges of socks, from
everyday ones that fit in normal shoes to the
thickest terry-looped walking socks.
Alpaca is a unique fibre that is more
insulating than other wools, repels odour
and bacteria and is hypoallergenic. It is as
soft as cashmere to wear but far more hard-
wearing. Socks can be gift-boxed with a card
and sent worldwide, making them the
perfect gift for mothers and grandmothers.
u For a brochure, call 01886-853615,
www.perilla.co.uk

English Freesia from Yardley London

Quintessentially English perfumery, bath and body brand Yardley London,
renowned for capturing the delicate fragrance of English flowers since 1770,
is delighted to introduce English Freesia, a refreshing, light, citrus floral
fragrance, into the Contemporary Classics Floral Fragrance Collection.
This gorgeous new fragrance is a key trend for the new spring/summer
season, which will bring energising and uplifting floral scents and the
resurgence of vintage florals.
Freesia has a sweet citrus scent, and its delicate, vibrant flowers are a
springtime favourite, symbolising friendship, thoughtfulness and innocence.
This zestful fragrance has top notes of bergamot, lemon, mandarin and
cypress, which lead into a vibrant and aromatic floral heart that combines
freesia, lily of the valley, ginger and pepper, enhanced with a warm, sensual
base of sandalwood, musk and amber. The perfect gift for Mothers Day or
indulge in this energising citrus floral yourself.
u For information and to save 1/3 off the RSP of 9.99/14.99 (5oml/125ml)
for a limited time, visit www.yardleylondon.co.uk

Landon Tylers new home

fragrance collection
Would your mum like her home to be aromatically
fabulous with a scent that evokes happy
memories of times gone by?
With Landon Tylers new home fragrance
collection, in smart frosted diffuser bottles that
capture their stunning scents, this could be this
years perfect gift for your mum. Theres
something welcoming about having your senses
provoked by a beautiful perfume, and with the
Landon Tyler collection, you can do just that.
The collection is affordable, with prices
starting at 10. Moreover, they are lovingly
crafted to deliver lasting, high-quality bouquets.
Does anything trigger a memory like your
favourite scent?
u Landon Tyler is now available from Boots,
Joy & Notcutts, or for a local stockist,
visit www.LandonTyler.com

17 MARCH 2017 THE LADY 31

MothersDay_advertorialv4.indd 31 13/03/2017 17:09

 GIFT GUIDE

Vouchers for Bettys Laurent-Perrier Ros Champagne Belvas crystal blossom brooch, Mums Pretty Pastel Vase and
afternoon tea, 18.95pp, with ribbon birdcage gift box, rose gold, 49, by Ted Baker at Amara: bouquet, 30, Next Flowers:
Bettys: 0800-456 1919, 69.95, 31Dover: 0333-900 3131, 0800-587 7645, 0333-777 8050,
www.bettys.co.uk www.31dover.com www.amara.com www.nextflowers.co.uk

Dedicate a tree to Mum, FujiFilm Instax Mini8 instant Medium mixed chocolate
15 suggested donation, camera 10-shot bundle, selection box, 40, Rococo
Woodland Trust: 0330-333 5310, 69.95, Currys: 0344-561 0000, Chocolates: 020-3691 5719,
www.woodlandtrustshop.com/mum www.currys.co.uk www.rococochocolates.com

LADY LOVES
MOTHERS
Hand-forged bent candle
holder, 40, Highgrove:
Gold-plated pineapple earrings,
98, by Lele Sadoughi at Liberty:
DAY
0333-222 4555, 020-7734 1234,
www.highgrovegardens.com www.libertylondon.com

Scent of a Dream EDP, 30ml, Relax spa day, Great heart necklace, Turquoise beagle bust, 62,
49, Charlotte Tilbury: from 85pp, Grayshott Spa: 99, Swarovski: by Abigail Ahern at Debenhams:
01202-629527, 01428-602020, 00800-7467 4357, 0344-800 8877,
www.charlottetilbury.com www.grayshottspa.com www.swarovski.com www.debenhams.com

Gem ballerina slippers, Celebrate Sinatra, 29 April matinee,

Petite lavender bucket, cranberry, 6, M&S 16.50-47.50,
22, LOccitane: 0800-368 9000, 0333-014 8000 Royal Festival Hall: 020-7960 4200,
uk.loccitane.com www.marksandspencer.com ticket.southbankcentre.co.uk

32 THE LADY 17 MARCH 2017

LadyLoves MothersDay Mar17 v3.indd 32 13/03/2017 13:43

LY150_Printed SS Tops.qxp_CountColl_LY150_17_03_17 06/03/2017 09:45 Page 1

FREE 10 off
returns & FREE
P&P
No time
Save 10 on these limit
guarantee
pure cotton pretty Pure
silky

floral crew neck tops Tara

cotton

Current catalogue price 39 each

Special introductory price
29 each - a saving of 10 each
Superbly comfortable, feminine and
versatile crew neck tops. Cut from easycare
pure, soft Austrian cotton jersey with
flattering short sleeves. Wear on their own
or under knitwear and tailoring. Back length
approx. 24 . Machine washable.
S (34-36) M (38-40) L (42-44) XL (46-48)
39 29
Postage & packing 5.50 FREE

Ordering and delivery

For credit card orders phone
UK 0333 241 4458
Overseas 00 44 16977 45278 To fit
(we are here 9am-6pm Monday-Friday
sizes
10-24
and 9am-5pm Saturday).
Offer
Order from our website code
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alongside. Offer ends 22nd April 2017.
Allow 7 days for delivery.
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1K9 ML
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Untitled-6 35 10/03/2017 13:00

 HANG ON
The humble coat hanger is an unsung hero, helping to save our
precious clothes from ruin, says Virginia Ironside
W
hy is it people spend so much money
on their clothes, but so little on the
objects they hang them up on? We buy
a dress that costs hundreds of pounds,
then bung it on a spindly wire hanger,
squash it into a full wardrobe and slam the door.
Folding your clothes is a different matter. Feel the
piece of clothing through your hands, recommends arch
folder-and-tidier Marie Kondo, and communicate your
affection and gratitude through your palms for their
continuous support.
Yet no one seems to regard the hanging of clothes
with the same reverence.
People put so much energy into making coat hangers
clever, cheap or expensive, but consumers still dont really
notice them, says Sebastian Bergne, an award-winning
British industrial designer whose work is on show at the
Museum of Modern Art in New York. One of his latest
designs is a coat hanger called Mr Mause, which works
as a design object in its own right: covered with primary-
coloured soft bristles, it will maintain the shoulder shape
These days we take hangers for granted, but
they havent always held such a lowly position
of any dress or coat. And because its so delicate, its also
good for drying clothes on.
Bergne has been collecting coat hangers for 20 years,
particularly those that are odd or eccentric. He has an
inflatable one, a hanger that folds up so small you can put
it in your handbag, one for woolly hats and even one that
doubles up as a clothes brush.
The job of a coat hanger is to hold your clothing in the
best way it can so it stores well, stays in good condition
and is easily accessible. As we have lots of different clothes,
so we have different kinds of coat hangers hangers
for ties, skirts, trousers What the trade calls specific
hanger requirements, he says.
These days we tend to take coat hangers for granted,
but they havent always held such a lowly position in our
wardrobes. My grandmother once gave me a coat hanger
as a birthday present. It was narrow (presumably because
cupboards werent as wide in those days), and was padded
and covered in meticulously hand-stitched pleated
silk. It was a distinctly feminine object, as opposed to
the wide wooden coat hangers found in my fathers
cupboard, sometimes sculpted into whole shoulder
shapes to bear the weight of the padded jackets of the
1940s and 1950s.
According to Jane Ashelford, author of Care of Clothes,
garments used to be hung in wardrobes not on coat hangers,
but from loops sewn into a garment at the back in many
vintage clothes, youll still find a little strip inserted into
34 THE LADY 17 MARCH 2017
Coathangers Mar17 v2.indd 34
the neck with which to hang them up. The modern coat
hanger didnt make its appearance until the 1880s, when
mantle shoulders were used in shops to display clothes.
Prior to this, garments such as womens dresses and
mens coats were stored temporarily by hooking the
armholes over wooden pegs, says Dr Susan North, curator
of fashion at the Victoria & Albert Museum. Clothing
put away for a season would be stored in chests, and
voluminous skirts might be unpicked so they could
be stored flat to prevent creasing. In the 1630s, when
Charles I ordered suits from his tailor, a calico cover was
also made to protect them from dust, smoke and possibly
wool- or silk-eating insects.
As for washing garments, even the humble sprung
clothes-peg was only invented in 1853. Until then clothes
were either draped over washing lines or, more likely,
spread out on bushes to dry.
Today, coat hangers come in myriad different shapes.
Theres the crude wire one in the film Mommie Dearest,
Joan Crawford, played by Faye Dunaway, is so incensed
her daughter is using wire coat hangers to hang her
beautiful clothes on that the actress beats her mercilessly.
These hangers are not too dissimilar to those provided
by dry-cleaning shops only occasionally given a bit of
added width by a curved piece of white cardboard fixed
over them so shirts wont be marred by a straight line. But
whatever one may think of a wire coat hanger, its always
had other uses. I drove around for years with one as
an aerial, and they were useful to jemmy open car doors
or windows when youd lost your key.
An attempt at the ultimate wire hanger was made by
Sebastian Bergne and manufactured by Wireworks. Called
Hang On, it had many twists and bars so it became a hanger
on which you could really hang anything at all.
Then theres the wooden hanger, often with a couple
of grooves carved into the top so skirts can be hung from
their stitched-in loops although skirts these days are more
usually clipped to the straight bar on the hanger to hold
them in better shape. There is the hanger with a bar,
from which to hang folded trousers, and hangers with
all kinds of hooks and clips to hang ties, belts and hats
on. Best of this type is the Huggable Hanger slim but
with a velvety non-slip coating.
Worst, of course, are the hotel hangers designed to
frustrate anyone who wants to nick one as a souvenir.
While some you can lever off from the main hook, others
remain resolutely fixed in the cupboard and require a bit
of ingenuity to even hang anything on them at all.
The day of the simple wooden wardrobe is gone. These
days, those of us who cant afford dressing rooms in which
to hang our clothes will hang them on rails or, even better,
put our garments in fitted cupboards that often extend
along whole walls of our bedrooms. So isnt it time we
gave the lowly clothes hanger the status it deserves?
13/03/2017 14:37

HANG OR FOLD?
Skirts
Hang on clips hanging loops on
grooves distorts the waistband.
Dresses
Hang on normal hangers. Its
important that the cupboard
is big enough to accommodate
the length, otherwise dresses
can get squashed at the hem.
Jackets/coats
Hang on well-padded hangers
so the shape is retained.
Ideally, there should be a slight
neck-shape on the hanger to
prevent the jacket sliding, and
then distorting.
Jumpers
iSTOCK
Fold. Hanging would make them
Coathangers Mar17 v2.indd 35
STYLE SPECIAL
stretch, and wool doesnt
crease when folded.
Trousers
Hang by the ankles from clips.
The weight of the trouser pulls
them down and removes creases.
If theyre hung over a bar, the bar
of the hanger should have volume
to prevent creases developing
around the knees.
T-shirts
Fold or roll to prevent creasing.
Shirts
Hang on something with a bit
of volume. Its important not
to pack them too tightly in a
cupboard or theyll crease. Again,
a hanger with a slight neck-shape
is preferable to prevent them
becoming lopsided.
17 MARCH 2017 THE LADY 35
13/03/2017 16:54
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36 THE LADY 17 MARCH 2017

Untitled-7 36 13/03/2017 15:11

 STYLE SPECIAL

W
e all change
shape as we age
and although
that does not
necessarily
mean getting larger, many of us
do just that, particularly round
the middle. There is definitely a
psychological barrier to accepting
you might be a size larger than you
used to be, that you are bigger than
you want to be, or even that simply
because you can just about squeeze
into your usual size, you still look
good in it Im always thinking
Im a size smaller than I really am.
Of course some labels usually
the expensive ones are cut more
generously than others, so your
wardrobe might already contain
several apparently different sizes,
though they all fit you the same way.
The fact is, though, that
whatever the label says, you
definitely look, and, just as
importantly feel, slimmer if clothes
are a bit looser on you not just
trousers, but almost everything;
looser clothes disguise the bits
youd rather hide and soften the
silhouette. So, never buy anything
too tight. Rather than squeezing

Dress for your age

into a size 12, for example, perhaps
you should try on a size 14? And if
it makes you feel better to cut out
the label, then by all means do it.

(& SHAPE)
Nobody will know except you. Its
just a number, after all. We have all
learnt the lesson of buying shoes
a size too small and dealing with
the subsequent agony...

Waists and tummies

I think youve got to accept that
even if you are not overweight, you
may be becoming thicker around
the waist. Theres not much you can
do about that (although exercise
can help) since it is an undeniable,
if unpalatable, fact that our
metabolism slows with age,
and there is also a change in
hormone levels associated with
the menopause.
As far as the tummy is
concerned, by a certain age most
people have lost some muscle
tone anyone who has had a child,
particularly and some of the
elasticity of their stomach muscles
will have gone.
I always used to hate elasticated
trousers and skirts, and most
people would shriek at the idea,
Dressing well as you get older is easy
if you have the know-how, says Anna Harvey
but actually they are often the like bread dough spilling over the
only practical solution if you want rim of a loaf tin not a great look.
to wear a straight skirt or trousers. I could starve myself, but the last
Model Jerry Hall, however, thing to look better would be the
famously said, Never wear an waist, so tight-waisted things are
elasticated waistline, because if no longer any good for me.
you do you will never know if you You do need some give somewhere
are gaining weight or inches. She perhaps just around the back.
does have a point. The late, great Jean Muir designed
Even if you hold your tummy in very desirable, well-cut wool crepe
when you are standing, the minute skirts with waistbands that were
you sit down, it all comes out in the slightly elasticated frumpy they
front; it droops over the waistband, were not. w
Wear fewer white shirts as you grow older. Try colour
instead deep red, purple, dark green. Grace Coddington
17 MARCH 2017 THE LADY 37

Dress your shape Mar17 v3.indd 37 13/03/2017 16:55

 STYLE SPECIAL
There is no such thing
as being underdressed
or overdressed just
well dressed or badly
dressed. Charlotte Scott
Hiding the upper arms
Whenever I go into a boutique or
dress department, first I walk quickly
around once to see how many things
hanging on the rails have sleeves.
And then I pull each one out to see
whether it is a jacket or a dress.
If there is nothing with sleeves,
I walk out again. You could ask,
and I do, why dont stores always
carry dresses with sleeves? And
if they do stock sleeveless dresses,
CONTACTS
Bombshell HQ
u 020-8446 8493,
www.bombshellhq.com
Box2
u 01273-832956,
www.box2.co.uk
Artigiano
u 0844-482 2345,
www.artigiano.co.uk/
woolblendtrousers
38 THE LADY 17 MARCH 2017
Dress your shape Mar17 v3.indd 38
why dont they also stock pretty
cardigans that actually go with
the dresses on display? So, because
they dont, I buy my cardigans
separately mostly cheap and
mostly from Uniqlo; cotton in the
summer, cashmere in the winter.
Personally, I prefer ones that button
to the neck V-neck ones are
slightly more difficult to work with
dress necklines; they look better
worn with round necks or shirts.
Colour and pattern
Before you begin to be specific about
how to dress, this seems a good place
to think about colour and pattern,
and the pitfalls and pleasures of both.
I do think that what colours you
wear and what actually suits you
is even more important as you get
older. I really feel that as a broad rule
of thumb you have to go for softer
tones of the more vibrant primary
shades such as bright reds, yellows
and blues. (Of course, if youre very
bronzed and on the beach under
a brilliant sky and golden sun, you
can go for any colour you like no
holds barred.) But for day-to-day
life I do think that somewhat
lighter, softer colours work much
better with the lighter skin that
seems to come as one ages.
Try not to wear too much
black during the day it is ageing.
Instead try grey, light or dark, or
neutrals (not camel!). And not too
much white or cream, other than
as a T-shirt or shirt.
For some reason, navy blue is
seen as a difficult colour, or just
another version of black. Its not,
of course; it is softer, warmer than
black, and, I think, much nicer. Ive
worn a lot of navy over the years,
particularly as an alternative to
crow-like black. I find it chic and
flattering for almost any occasion,
day or night. People sometimes feel
that too much navy can look like a
uniform, but unless it is a severe
suit which could make you look like
an airline employee give it a try.
Brown, too, in all its tones, is
much underrated chestnut,
caramel and chocolate, both milk
and plain, are very pretty, very
flattering shades for every skin
shade. Even the names are enticing.
In the evening, dont ignore jewel
and berry colours, which can flatter
in evening light sapphire, garnet,
emerald, blackberry, raspberry,
blueberry and damson, for example.
Black, if you really like it and
can wear it, comes into its own in
the evening and is always smart.
You can brighten up black clothes
with jewellery, and if it is a short
dress or skirt, wear sheer (as sheer
as you can find) flesh-coloured
tights; black sheer tights are also
fine if your legs are good.
Any colour for the evening
is lifted with jewellery or even
a beautiful pair of shoes in a mad,
glamorous colour such as saffron,
red, emerald or shocking pink.
Possibly those expensive coloured
shoes you bought for that wedding
will fit the bill.
Saying all that, I dont really
like too many rules about colour
someone saying flatly that you
cant wear yellow, for example.
Do experiment, but remember
that during the day, no brights, and
definitely very little black. I feel a bit
of a hypocrite saying this, as I wear
black in the daytime occasionally,
even in summer. This is because
it was the fashion uniform during
most of my career, and breaking
away from a habit is difficult. But
when shopping these days, I am
definitely ditching the black and
ANNA HARVEY, iSTOCK
trying to buy only colours and
neutral shades.
u Edited extract from Timeless Style:
Dressing Well for the Rest of Your
Life by Anna Harvey, published by
Double-Barrelled Books, priced 18.95.
13/03/2017 16:55
 SAVE 30 ON ARTIGIANOS FAMOUS SAVE
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Available in fashionable Soft Camel, Black, Navy,
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To qualify for this offer, dont forget to quote offer
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BLACK
ATST361 Classic Leg Wool Blend Trousers - SAVE 30 79
ATST366 Easy-Fit Pull-On Wool Blend Trousers - SAVE 30 79
Standard Delivery - UK Mainland. CHAMPAGNE
OFFER CODE Phone or online orders only (excludes certain postcodes) FREE
25FK Next Day Delivery: 9.95
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Artigiano, 1 Crompton Rd, Groundwell, POSTCODE
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Managed by Scotts & Co. Reg. No. 2548299
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Untitled-4 39
MS 23539 297x210 Wool Blend Trousers.indd 1 10/03/2017
07/03/2017 12:47
17:18
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Untitled-3 40 10/03/2017 12:40


THE GLOBETROTTER
Treats for
your mother
Celebrate Mothers Day in
style. By Melonie Clarke
AFTERNOON
TREATS
A first-class afternoon tea
Savour a Victorian afternoon
tea within the elegance of
the First Class Dining Saloon
aboard Brunels SS Great Britain.
Explore the stationary ship
before tucking into delicious
sandwiches filled with smoked
salmon and cucumber, tasty
fruit scones with Somerset
butter, smothered in clotted
cream and preserves, and
baked-on-board cakes.
u 25 per adult, 15 per child
(17 years and under); a family
ticket (two adults and two
children) costs 70. Mothers
Day Afternoon Tea sittings
are 2.30pm or 4pm, 26 March,
Brunels SS Great Britain,
Great Western Dockyard,
Bristol: 0117-926 0680,
www.ssgreatbritain.org
Vintage afternoon tea
Enjoy a delicious tea party in
Upton Houses vintage kitchen.
Complete with tasty cakes,
sandwiches, tea and a glass
iSTOCK
Travel Mar17 v2.indd 41
of sparkling
wine, it
will be an
afternoon to
remember.
Make a day
of it and explore
the house
afterwards, and take in
an exhibition about the
propertys history. Outside,
stroll past sweeping lawns
and vivid borders that are
alive with spring blooms.
u 15 per person, at 2pm and
3.30pm, 26 March (booking
essential). Upton House and
Gardens, Warwickshire:
01295-670266, www.national
trust.org.uk
Putting on the Ritz
The Ritz is hosting a special
Mothers Day Afternoon Tea
on Mothering Sunday. An
assortment of delicate finger
sandwiches, indulgent French
pastries and warm scones with
strawberry jam and lashings
of cream is accompanied by a
glass of Ritz Ros Champagne
Left: Enjoy sandwiches
and cakes aboard SS Great
Britain. Below: Goodfayre
indulges Mums sweet side.
Right: Flower arranging
adds a vibrant touch
Take afternoon tea at Upton House (left) or The Ritz
(above) and luxuriate in your plush surroundings
and your choice
from 18 varieties
of loose-leaf tea. Tickets
also include a Miranda Heldt
CD and a Ritz Tea Tin as a gift.
u From 79pp, 11.30am-9.15pm,
26 March, The Ritz London,
150 Piccadilly, London: 020-7300
2345, www.theritzlondon.com
SPECIAL DAYS
Final masterclass
Create a bouquet with royally
appointed florist, Moyses
Stevens, at this masterclass.
All attendees will learn the
basics of floristry, matching
evergreen foliage and blooms
to create bouquets all year
round, and will leave the class
with a hand-tied bouquet in
time for Mothering Sunday.
u 35 per person, 22 March,
The Grand Terrace, St Pancras
International, Euston Road,
TRAVEL
London: 0800- 652 8399,
www.eventbrite.co.uk
Chocolate tasting
Ethical shop Goodfayre is
hosting an indulgent Mothers
Day Chocolate Tasting
Workshop on Mothering
Sunday. Theyll take you on
an exploration, looking at
a variety of chocolates from
around the world, learning
about the farms theyve come
from, how theyre made and
what they taste like. Attendees
also get 10 per cent off any
chocolate bought in-store.
u 8-16, Goodfayre, Cross Keys
Arcade, Queen Street, Salisbury,
Wiltshire: 0800-652 8399,
www.eventbrite.co.uk
Boat trip with bubbles
Treat your mum to a gentle
boat ride through the w
17 MARCH 2017 THE LADY 41
13/03/2017 14:18
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42 THE LADY 17 MARCH 2017

Untitled-11 42 13/03/2017 17:02


Above: Nature-spotting along the
Wicken Lode. Right: Idyllic Compton
Pool Farm. Far right: Ellenborough
Park provides excellent spa facilities
National Trusts oldest nature
reserve. An hour-long trip
along Wicken Lode provides
the opportunity to see the
spring wildlife from a new
perspective and enjoy the
tranquillity of the river.
u 7.25 per adult (includes a
glass of bubbly), 4.50 per child
(includes a soft drink), normal
admission charges apply,
26 March. Wicken Fen,
Cambridgeshire: 01353-720274,
www.nationaltrust.org.uk/
wicken-fen-nature-reserve
TRIPS AWAY
Take to the slopes
VIP SKI is offering a special
holiday to celebrate Mothers
Day. A large shared chalet at
VIP CLUB Aspen in the heart
of Val dIsre starts at
1,200pp (down from 1,440,
saving 249) for a seven-night
stay arriving Sunday 26 March.
VIP CLUB Bellevarde, again
in Val dIsre, is also offering
a cut-price break. Mothers
Day VIP SKI will provide a free
lift pass to all guests staying,
worth 250. Prices start at
1,499pp for seven nights,
arriving Sunday 26 March.
In Mribel, VIP SKIs flagship
Bellacima Lodge is offering
stays, with prices starting at
1,100pp (down from 1,599,
saving 499) for seven nights,
arriving Sunday 26 March.
u VIP SKIs packages
Travel Mar17 v2.indd 43
include
return
flights
from
London
Gatwick, all
transfers, seven nights full-
board accommodation and
dedicated chalet service: 020-
8875 1957, www.vip-chalets.com
Stylish spa stay
Oozing style and with a bijou
spa, Ellenborough Park
on the edge of Cheltenham
racecourse is a historic
Cotswolds manor house.
Leisure facilities include an
outdoor heated swimming
pool and a spa with seven
treatment rooms, sauna, steam
room, Jacuzzi pool, monsoon
showers and relaxation room.
The Secret Spa Retreat starts at
375 for two people (188pp)
and includes overnight
accommodation, a 55-minute
spa treatment per person
(choose from a revitalising
full body massage, manicure,
Left: Chalet accommodation in Mribel is cosy after a hard days skiing. Above: Take in
the stunning vistas and tackle the slopes at Val dIsre
pedicure or
facial), a
two-course
dinner, full
English breakfast
and use of the spa
facilities. Valid Sunday to Friday.
u Ellenborough Park: 01242-
807715, www.ellenborough
park.com
Cottage break
Compton Pool Farm, Devon,
is offering Mum and one child
over eight years old a Penguin
Feeding Experience worth
100 at Penguin Beach, Living
Coasts in Torquay. Theyre also
offering savings on breaks
in two- or three-bedroom
cottages over Mothers Day
weekend, plus free Sunday
night stays for families
booking a two-night break,
arriving Friday 24 March.
u Two nights in a two-bedroom
cottage for four guests costs
395 (saving 67) and two
nights in a three-bedroom
cottage sleeping six costs 495
TRAVEL
(saving 79): 01803-872241,
www.premiercottages.co.uk
The royal treatment
At Knock Castle Hotel & Spa,
near Crieff, Perthshire, mothers
will receive free fresh flowers,
handmade chocolates and
a bottle of prosecco. They can
also enjoy a 60-minute spa
treatment and a three-course
dinner in the evening.
u Prices for a double room start
at 369. Theres also a Mothers
Day lunch and spa treatment
offer, which costs 50: 01764-
650088, www.knockcastle.com
Getting back to nature
For mums who love nature, a
glamping break in a shepherds
hut at Two Hoots adult-only
campsite in rural Hampshire
is sure to suit. The traditional
huts have all mod cons, too.
u Shepherds huts 95 per
night, minimum two nights.
Camping pods 60-75 per
night: 01962-772242, www.
twohootscampsite.co.uk
17 MARCH 2017 THE LADY 43
13/03/2017 14:18
 OPINION
Modern
manners
Your friends may love their uninhabitable
home in the country, but you dont have to
Dear Thomas,
I need urgent help with a
problem of how to refuse
gracefully. Let me explain:
two very dear friends, both
bachelors, have purchased,
in Northern France, an old
presbytery in urgent need
of renovation.
I have seen photographs of
the work in progress and I am
impressed by the change from
near-bleak monastic style to a
more quaint decorative style.
However, quaint does not
mean comfort as the boys
(and I use the term loosely)
have hinted there may be a
paucity of heating and hot
water. Therein lies my problem
how can I refuse their constant
invitations to visit la belle France
until they can guarantee the
most basic living standards?
I look forward to your comments.
C Gosneth, Highgate, London
Dear C Gosneth,
How I feel for you! For many years
I longed to visit the country at
weekends but the only opportunities
were offered to me by friends with
challenging accommodation
animals all over the AGA and in
the washing-up bowl, a vacuum
cleaner the mistress of the house
had no command of as to function;
that kind of thing.
Maybe it is the case that only
those of no or low domestic
Where basic amenities are denied, there is little to
be done. One can hardly install a heating system
44 THE LADY 17 MARCH 2017
ModernManners Mar17 v1.indd 44
standards would ever have the
nerve to invite anybody to stay
in this servant-less age.
I did not hesitate, as a visitor,
to vac and dust and polish myself.
After all, house guests should lay
the table and wash up, so why
not be even more helpful? But
where basic amenities are denied,
there is little to be done. One
can hardly set about installing
a heating system.
On the other hand, a country
home so honed and pitched up to
a state of bland perfection can have
its drawbacks, the first of which This could be just the spur they
might be the prissy, fussy occupants
who are mad-keen to invite you
only so they can push you out again
as quickly as possible perhaps
even before Sunday lunch. These
types dont encourage mucking
in. They acquired a rural retreat in
order to be idyllic and invite their
friends but when it comes to it,
WHAT TO DO ABOUT A MRS
Am I right or am I wrong do fewer
persons nowadays from the realms of
officialdom, the power services and so
on, phone up and ask to speak to a Mrs
Connybeer or a Mr Opalbrook? This
inclusion of the indefinite article is
supposed to indicate lack of acquain-
tance with the individual in question.
So one becomes indeed not an
individual but one of a range of possible
Mrs Gardendoors. I cant believe the
formula was ever intended to be polite.
the whole thing is a terrible strain
and bore.
It could be that your dear
friends with their crazy unheated
presbytery are to be treasured.
If they are so wayward and haphazard
as to have failed to install chauffage,
would they really mind if you were
quite straight with them in a
perfectly delightful way, of course?
No need to evasively suggest that
you might stay for one night only
or even merely drop by for tea.
But everything depends on
how you put it try for a mock-
imperious tone: Really, its quite
impossible to visit until delicious
piping hot water gushes forth from
the taps, which will surely be soon.
need to get that former religious
dwelling up to scratch.
Please send your
questions to thomas.
blaikie@lady.co.uk or
write to him at The Lady,
39-40 Bedford Street,
London WC2E 9ER
Really, its frightfully rude. The only
possible response is, I am certainly
not a Mrs Silverlock. I am the Mrs
ILLUSTRATION TAKEN FROM BLAIKIES GUIDE TO
Silverlock. I wonder if anyone ever
MODERN MANNERS (FOURTH ESTATE, 10)
phoned up Timberlake Wertenbaker,
the playwright, and said, Id like to
speak to a Timberlake Wertenbaker?
It helps to have an exceptional
name, and these days many do, being
called North West or Novelette.
WH Auden said hed be furious if he
came across anyone else called
Wystan. I was surprised, though,
when someone phoned me up and by
way of introduction said, This
is a Mrs Stuart speaking.
13/03/2017 14:04
 Extra wide or feet?
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Untitled-4 45
LA0317_The_Lady_Full_Page.indd 1 10/03/2017
17/02/2017 12:49
15:23
 SLUG HERE

Amaryllis in old
pickle jars. They
dont need soil, so
long as the roots
are kept wet

Natural style
Willow Crossley celebrates the art of living with nature and
shares beautiful projects to bring the outside in

Painted pumpkins and squash

make a lovely table decoration

46 THE LADY 17 MARCH 2017

House 17Mar v2.indd 46 13/03/2017 14:10

 HOUSE

Nautilus shells
make great pots
for snake plants
(Sansevieria)

For this striking table display, pears covered

with gold spray paint are paired with lemons,
limes and beech leaves

I
am neither a florist nor an interior designer,
just flower-mad with a passion for decorating.
I grew up in rural Wales and was rooted in the
countryside, but from an early age my outdoor
life was connected to homemaking. I picked
wild flowers. Walks were spent nose down, treasure-
hunting for my relics, and when I made a den with my
brothers, I insisted on being chief decorator.
I can remember being given a bunch of lilies on my
14th birthday by my friend Alex. We were both at
boarding school and didnt own a vase, so they had to
live in a basin. I absolutely loved them and loitered in
the bathroom admiring their beauty. They made me
feel inexplicably happy and marked the start of my love
affair with flowers. Ive never looked back.
When I was about 15, I became bored by my sleepy
PHOTOGRAPHY BY EMMA MITCHELL

horizons and longed for something glitzier. I eventually

moved to London, where life was intoxicating. I made
new friends, went to university, got a job and loved
it all. But, 10 years later, I began to want the calmer,
prettier way of life again. This coincided perfectly with
Chaz, my (now) husband, moving to a remote vineyard
in the south of France, and I followed him.
We spent the next five years in rustic bliss. When Cherry and apple blossoms, with apple slices (soak in
not crushing grapes, I was filling trugs with lavender, w lemon juice first) placed between two glass vases

17 MARCH 2017 THE LADY 47

House 17Mar v2.indd 47 13/03/2017 14:10

 HOUSE
Line a wine box with
gravel and peat and
plant with hyacinths
Should there be a surface without a vase on it, Ill
put shells, fir cones, crystals, herbs or plants there
trawling the local markets for fabrics and treasures,
and beachcombing. I would bring home my spoils,
excited by how they turned our house into a home.
Its unthinkable for me not to have flowers at home,
but should there be a surface without a vase on it, Ill
put shells, fir cones, crystals, herbs or plants there
instead. Natural elements bring an affordable and
accessible dimension to an interior, and drawing nature
into your life also brings in the magic.
u Inspire: The Art of Living with Nature by Willow
Crossley, with photography by Emma Mitchell, is
published by Cico Books, priced 16.99.
Primroses in cups and bowls (above)
and strawberries in teapots (right).
Line both with stones for drainage
48 THE LADY 17 MARCH 2017
House 17Mar v2.indd 48
HOME HELP
by Hugh St Clair
Q I have a brooch that is of
huge sentimental value,
although, as its not made of precious
metal, it has little cash value. The pin
has become detached, do you know
of any specialists who could repair it?
I have a local goldsmith but think he
wont deal in anything that is not
silver or gold.
RT, email
A Many jewellers will not
repair costume jewellery
because it is made of what is called
base metal, which means soldering
doesnt always work. Hirschfelds
in London specialises in repairing
jewellery made with non-precious
metals using a laser. I showed
your photo to Hirschfelds and it
estimated the work would cost
15-25. Send the brooch by post
insured, of course or contact
the company for a precise cost.
u 020-7405 1536, www.jewellery-
repairs-london.co.uk
Q I want to frame some
coloured prints but dont
know what colour frame to choose
I feel that black or gold would
overpower the delicate pictures.
My local framer says its my choice
and wont offer guidance. Can you
offer me some pointers, please?
DJ, email
A A simple, plain, bleached-
wood frame and an off-white
mount (if you need one) would not
overpower. For a more modern look,
pick out one of the colours in the
picture for the frame.
Q I am looking to put in
outdoor lighting where
can I find a good selection?
BD, email
A Cox & Cox is an online shop
with a printed catalogue
that has copper, brass, zinc, steel
and black-painted outdoor lights
in traditional and modern styles.
It even has lights you can string
through the trees.
u 0330-333 2123, www.coxandcox.co.uk
PHOTOGRAPHY CREDIT
Send your queries to the usual
Bedford Street address or email
hughstclair@googlemail.com
13/03/2017 14:11
 ANTIQUES

THE ANTIQUES LADY

Fiona Shoop, antiques expert and author of
How To Deal In Antiques, answers your queries

Q My husband got me a your mascot, so its best to either get it

car mascot of a dancer
for my birthday. Its stamped
Desmo. Do you know anything
about it? Im a dance instructor
and I want to put it on my Mini.
TC, Surrey Desmo mascot
A What a great gift! Desmo
made many collectable car
mascots, including depictions of
Lady Godiva, a greyhound and
a leaping salmon. In the 1930s,
it created several dancing
girls made of chrome over
brass, including one holding her
short skirts aloft and another that
looks like a flapper with a bow in her hair.
The firm was founded in the 1900s, making
car mascots from the 1920s onwards,
and the infamous boxer and actor Freddie
Fearless Mills demonstrated how its wing
mirror sprang back into position by
punching it! Just to let you know, you can
be found liable if someone gets injured on
attached with nylon fixings so it will
snap off in the event of an accident or to
make it retractable to prevent injuries.
Q I bought a collection of jigsaws at
a car boot sale and one of them is
a wooden picture of Bonzo. Its made by
AVN Jones and called the Studdy Dog.
The dog is curled up with what looks like
a tailors accessories. Is it worth anything,
and are there any more Bonzo jigsaws
for me to collect?
JG, Essex
A George Studdy (1878-1948)
created the popular Staffordshire
terrier-type dog, which appeared in
films, plays and books and on a variety of
merchandise, including jigsaws. A version
of the comic dog was first seen in 1911 in
Pearsons Magazine and later appeared
regularly in The Sketch magazine, with
many readers writing in and demanding
to know what the dog was called. In 1922,
Bonzo jigsaw
the Studdy Dog was finally given a
name, Bonzo. AVN Jones & Co of London
produced 31 different jigsaws featuring
the famous dog, each using 100 pieces
made of walnut. Curiously, the image on
the lid didnt always match the jigsaw
picture. Different versions include Bonzo
meeting a cat, and Battling Bonzo, which
featured a larger dog and a Peke, one of
Bonzos regular friends. The vintage ones
usually sell for 80-plus each, depending
on condition, but be aware that there are
modern versions sold by other makes.
u Contact Fiona at antiques@lady.co.uk or
at The Ladys usual Bedford Street address.

HOROSCOPES
17 to 23 March 2017 by Victor Olliver

ARIES CANCER attention and can be appreciation will reap AQUARIUS

21 March
to 20 April
The sun enters Aries, the
start of the Rams new
year. If theres an obstacle
to an ambitious plan, the
solution is to speak very
clearly, with eyes fixed.
TAURUS
21 April to 21 May
Make the most of a
chance to share a secret
or offer words of comfort
as confidante. One of the
great gifts you can give
someone is reassurance.
GEMINI
22 May to 21 June
After a period of feistiness,
nows the time to show
how charming you can be
to heal a rift in a group.
People will lap it up.
22 June to 22 July
A holiday or other break
from routine will benefit
from you checking until May.
trifling paperwork in
triplicate. Very shortly,
career matters grow
in importance.
LEO
23 July
to 23 August
Travel is well-starred this
week, if only because
your mind is attuned to
beauty, new delights,
and exciting company.
For once, believe the
holiday brochure.
VIRGO
24 August starved kitty cat or your
to 22 September
A money or property
matter comes to your
resolved happily before
26 March. Otherwise, its
best to delay a decision
to 21 December
LIBRA
23 September
to 23 October
Partnerships of any kind
may have quite a fiery
quality, which is great
for trying new ideas,
being a little more
daring than usual and
indulging in romantic
candlelight dinners.
SCORPIO
24 October
to 22 November
Whether its your love-
overworked colleagues,
finding a moment to
show them your
so many rewards. 21 January
to 19 February
SAGITTARIUS Take some care with
23 November spending, as retail
therapy can easily turn
Your confidence may into buyers remorse.
not be at its highest Never mind someone
at the moment. You will be greatly charmed
can recover your usual by you this week.
bounce by slowly
picking through the PISCES
facts and distinguishing 20 February
whats real from what to 20 March
is imagined. An employer or other
officious busybody
CAPRICORN may make a nuisance
22 December of themselves this
to 20 January week. My advice? Feign
Thanks to your own respectful ignorance or
efforts, you can look throw them a compliment
forward to a happy that will almost certainly
home event. This is wrong-foot them.
also a good moment to
discuss domestic money u www.victorolliver.com
matters without rancour. u Twitter: @VictorOlliver

17 MARCH 2017 THE LADY 49

Antiques-Stars Mar17 v2.indd 49 13/03/2017 13:53

 JUST GOOD FOOD
Create a healthy toolbox of recipes and you can change
the way you cook, says Amber Rose
K
itchen staples and basics
recipes are the nuts and
bolts of every cook s
repertoire. Theyre what
I like to call the toolbox
recipes. They are the flavoursome,
nourishing base components and are
also the things that can finish a dish
to make it sing. In my kitchen they
are go-to recipes that can be adapted
throughout the year to create delicious
meals and satisfying bakes.
Armed with my simple, easy and
50 THE LADY 17 MARCH 2017
Food Mar17 v2.indd 50
delicious toolbox recipes you will be
in control of what goes into your food
and how it is prepared. Youll then
have the confidence to add seasonal
ingredients to adapt and embellish
your cooking and baking as the
seasons change to ensure maximum
nutrition and flavour.
Cooking and eating seasonally
means there are certain times of the
year when vegetables or fruits are in
abundance. Its during these times
that mountains of basil get made into
pesto and popped in the freezer for
use later in the year, or when the fruit
thats dripping off the trees is made
into jams, pickles, chutneys and sauces.
Many of my recipes are inspired
by my childhood seasonal, garden-
to-table cooking that can be whipped
up in a flash with the minimum of
ingredients and fuss.
u The Wholefood Pantry by Amber
Rose, with photographs by Nassima
Rothacker, is published by Kyle
Books, priced 19.99.
Winter salad with a creamy cashew
and preserved lemon dressing.
Opposite: A perfect poached egg
13/03/2017 13:45
 FOOD

Armed with my
toolbox recipes,
youll have the
confidence to adapt
your cooking as the
seasons change

17 MARCH 2017 THE LADY 51

Food Mar17 v2.indd 51 13/03/2017 13:45

 FOOD

Winter salad with

a creamy cashew
and preserved
lemon dressing
Serves 4-6
For the salad
u 1 large butternut squash
(or your favourite variety
of pumpkin)
u 4 tbsp ghee or olive oil
u Sea salt and freshly ground
black pepper
u 1 tbsp sunflower seeds
u 1 tbsp pumpkin seeds
u 1 tbsp black sesame seeds
u 10g flaked almonds
u 10g fresh basil leaves
u A handful of rocket leaves
u pomegranate, seeds
removed and rinsed
For the cashew and preserved
lemon dressing
u 150g cashews, soaked
u 2 tbsp chopped preserved
lemons (shop bought)
u 200ml almond milk
u Sea salt and freshly ground
black pepper Pannacotta

To make the dressing, simply put

all the ingredients into a bowl
and blitz with a stick blender,
adding more almond milk if you
require a thinner consistency
for drizzling (or use less than
specified if you want to make
a dip). Season to taste and set
aside for later.
Preheat the oven to 220C/
gas mark 7. Trim the base and
top off the squash, then cut it in
half lengthways. Use a spoon to
remove the seeds. Cut each half
into wedges about 3cm thick.
Arrange the wedges on
a roasting tray, skin-side down.
Brush with ghee or olive oil
and season well with salt and
pepper. Roast for 30-35 minutes.
Keep an eye on the wedges
depending on your oven
they may need a little longer or
a little less, but you dont want
them to burn.
When the wedges are just
catching at the edges and feel
tender all the way through when
poked with a knife, remove the
tray from the oven and allow
to cool.
Reduce the oven to 180C/
gas mark 4 and arrange all the
seeds and the almonds on
a clean baking tray. Pop into
the oven to toast for about
6-8 minutes, or until lightly
browned and popping.
When you are ready to
assemble the salad, arrange the
squash on a beautiful serving
platter, sprinkle over the toasted
seeds and almonds, basil, rocket
and pomegranate seeds, then
serve with the dressing on the
side. As a final flourish you can
drizzle with extra virgin olive
oil and add an extra sprinkle
of sea salt and freshly cracked
black pepper.
A perfect poached egg
Serves 1
u 1-2 organic, free-range
eggs per person, as fresh
as you can find
u 2 tsp apple cider vinegar
(this helps the eggs to hold
their shape)
Fill a medium, high-sided frying
pan with water to a depth of
a couple of inches. Set over a
medium heat and bring to
a bare simmer you dont
want the water to boil.
Crack your first egg into
a ramekin or teacup and have
your toast or salad ready before
you start to cook.
Add the vinegar to the pan
of barely simmering water,
then carefully swirl the water
to make a gentle whirlpool.
Slide the egg carefully, white
first, into the centre of the
whirlpool. Allow the egg to
cook a little, then move it out
of the centre with a slotted
spoon. Repeat this method
with a second egg.
The eggs should only take
about 2-3 minutes to cook for
a soft poached yolk. You can
lift them up out of the water
with the slotted spoon and give
the yolks a prod to see how
done they are. If they are ready,
lay them on to kitchen paper
to drain or, if they need more
cooking, lower them back into
the water to cook a little longer.
Once the eggs are cooked
and drained, transfer them to
your waiting toast or salad and
serve immediately to ensure
they are lovely and hot when
you eat them.
Pannacotta
Serves 4
u 400ml full-fat coconut milk
or 300ml double cream plus
100ml milk, mixed together
u 1 tsp gelatine (grass-fed,
if possible)
u vanilla pod, seeds only,
or tsp vanilla powder
u 60-80ml maple syrup
Pour half your chosen milk into
a saucepan, add the gelatine
and give it a good whisk, then
set aside for 5 minutes to allow
to bloom.
Add the vanilla, then gently
warm the mixture over a medium
heat, whisking thoroughly to
dissolve the gelatine. Do not let
the mix boil or you will destroy
the setting ability of the gelatine.
When the gelatine has
dissolved and the mix is warm
to hot, remove from the heat and
add the rest of the milk, stirring
thoroughly. Add the maple syrup
to taste (start with 60ml and taste
the mix, then add a little more if
needed). I prefer my pannacotta
not too sweet, but it depends
what you are serving it with.
Pour the mixture into four little
moulds or teacups and chill in the
fridge for 4 hours or overnight.
To serve, dip each mould
into very hot water for a few
seconds, then turn the pannacotta
upside-down on to a dessert
plate and remove the mould.
Top with fresh or cooked fruit
and serve.

52 THE LADY 17 MARCH 2017

Food Mar17 v2.indd 52 13/03/2017 13:46

 WEEKLY COLLECTORS SERIES

The Lady
ARCHIVE RECIPES
ES
F
rom one of our
earliest recipes for
biscuits to unique
concoctions for savouries
and sweets, The Lady
has been inspiring cooks
for 131 years. No other
magazine has an archive
as rich, varied and reliable,
which is why we are often
asked for tasty reminders
from our past. So now we
have decided to reproduce
a recipe every week from
The Lady Archive Recipes.
This one is from 1957. Try
it and send us a snap to
the usual Bedford Street
address or Tw itter
@TheLadyMagazine using
#LadyArchiveRecipes
Until next week

17 MARCH 2017 THE LADY 53

ArchiveRecipe Mar17 v1.indd 53 13/03/2017 13:47

 1 At this time of year, garden centres and other
suppliers are full of robust and hardy plants
to decorate window boxes and other containers.
Potted daffodils and tulips, primulas and viola
will provide excellent colour until you are ready
to put out summer bedding plants.

Rose Gore-Brown,
manager of the RHS
Flower Show Cardiff,
shares her top 10
maintenance tips for
the coming season

Spring
gardening...
2 Hardy vegetables
can be sown in
March. These include
4 In mild coastal
regions, potatoes
can be planted early
carrots, Boltardy in March. Whether
beetroot, lettuce, theyre inland or
parsnips, radish, on hills, its a good
onions particularly idea to cover them
spring onions with protective
and leeks. horticultural fleece.

3 Sowing tomatoes
on windowsills
is easy in March, and
5 Slugs levels were
at their highest
in 50 years in 2016,
they can be put out the RHS Advice Team
in greenhouses in found. Spring-clean
April. Blight-resistant to remove their hiding
cultivars like Crimson places and expose
Crush are a top choice them to weather
for outdoor crops. and predators.
iSTOCK

54 THE LADY 17 MARCH 2017

Gardening Mar 17 v2.indd 54 13/03/2017 14:14

 GARDENING

6 Save yourself
extra work by
adding 3in (8cm) of
8 Houseplants will
perk up as light
levels are increasing,
mulch this month to and will respond to
the soil around trees, extra watering. Divide
shrubs and fruit trees, them now if possible,
before it gets too wet. so that they have all
This will help suppress summer to put down
weed growth. good roots for winter.

7 Reduce the lawn

height each time
you mow. Moss will
9 Refer to the
RHSs Perfect
For Pollinators list for
be shaded out by the insect-friendly plants
grass, especially if planting these helps
lawn fertiliser is used. support wildlife. There
A moss killer can be will be a wide range
used if the problem at the RHS Flower
becomes severe. Show Cardiff.

Ponds will become

a hotbed of activity now

u For more inspiration and advice,

come along to RHS Flower Show
Cardiff, 7-9 April. Weve pulled out
all the stops to bring you the best

gardens and floral displays by top
plant nurseries and designers. As
well as the beautiful spring blooms,
you can also enjoy superb shopping,
family fun, delicious food and live
music. Make a day of it and enjoy this
amazing occasion. Book in advance
for just 10: www.rhs.org.uk/shows.
10
Frogs and toads are spawning. If youre
lucky enough to have a pond with spawn,
you might need to move the spawn to a separate
container if fish are present. If you dont have a pond
then consider making one theyre one of the most
wildlife-friendly garden features, and its amazing
how frogs, toads and newts will colonise the water.

17 MARCH 2017 THE LADY 55

Gardening Mar 17 v2.indd 55 13/03/2017 14:14

 OPINION

HIM ON THE FARM by Robin Page

Conservationists are concerned
about the cheetah population

KENYA PART III

W hen I first drove down into the Great Rift Valley

from Nairobi to head for the Maasai Mara in the
late 1970s, the population of Kenya was around only
with possible serious long-term consequences to the whole
ecosystem. OK, Kenya needs more wheat, but at what cost?
Elsewhere, we saw the tracks of thousands of cattle
14 million (today, it is 48.5 million and growing by 2.5 per driven into the reserve to graze every night, many of
cent a year). Then, it was a hot, dusty drive where we them apparently owned by wildlife wardens. With TV
saw a variety of herders (women, men and children) crews currently filming in the Mara, it will be interesting
with sheep, goats and donkeys, and then the Maasai in to see what viewers will be shown, and whether any vital
their traditional bright cloaks. But this time I did not conservation issues will be ignored completely.
spot any tribespeople in customary dress until I saw an On every trip to the Maasai Mara Ive been fortunate
old woman in the Maasai town of to see my favourite, but most endangered,
Narok, and by then Id already spotted cat the cheetah. What a magnificent
three youths in Arsenal shirts. The cheetahs animal, and what a struggle it has to
For a million years the surrounding survive. Some conservationists believe
land has experienced the footprints of fur is surprisingly that over time the creature will lose the
man, plus the footfall of wildlife and fight, but I hope they are wrong. Lulu
livestock. But everywhere now, huge coarse, but their and I have been lucky enough to stroke
tractors are at work dragging large disc tame cheetahs at the Nairobi Animal
harrows, breaking into the locked
purr is full Orphanage. Dont be fooled, their fur is
fertility of the land, with great clouds of
dust indicating pastureland turning into
of appreciation surprisingly coarse, but their purr is full
of satisfaction and appreciation.
cereal land. Each year Kenya produces In the Mara we saw Malaika, which
350,000 tonnes of wheat, although it needs triple that means angel and beautiful girl, with her pair of
amount 1.08 million tonnes and every year the three-quarters-grown cubs. What beauty and grace
cultivated land creeps closer to the Maasai Mara. well, just as long as youre not an antelope!
Soon we were in the Maasai Mara National Reserve Our trip to Kenya this year with a group of friends was
(surely it should be a National Park?), but it was an odd wonderful. But there has been a lingering anxiety: how
experience. For the first time on this visit, I saw huge can Kenyas wildlife remain safe as its human population
herds of wildebeest and buffalo, which was astonishing. explodes? And heres the rub what about the wildlife back
Across the Loita Plains to the north-east, land divisions in Blighty, and how will that cope with our still-rocketing
iSTOCK

and fences have cut off an important seasonal migration population? The problem, whether in Kenya or the UK,
route, keeping thousands of animals inside the reserve, is an environmental one. Its as simple as that.

56 THE LADY 17 MARCH 2017

HimOnTheFarm_Mar17 v2.indd 56 13/03/2017 14:13

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17 MARCH 2017 THE LADY 57

SubSingle Mar17 v2.indd 57 13/03/2017 13:44

 ADVERTORIAL

London s
The auction
house
that asks wh
at it
ou
Auction
can do for y

L
ike many people, I have
a weakness for shop-
ping. I love the experi-
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served by knowledgeable and passion-
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item, and I love a bargain. So when it
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where I was introduced to their knowl- was struck by the number of beautiful
edgeable specialists. They guided me pieces of Art, furniture and clothing
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available, making suggestions that any Kensington or Mayfair boutique,
opened my eyes to styles I would and the service to match, I found my-
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only this but they also provided a so- tions has left me with the lasting im-
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PHOTOGRAPHY CREDIT MARIA BIANCA ABRUDAN

industrial parks, I no longer

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auction, they also offered to travel to - saskia@londonauctions.co
me to provide professional valuations
from their in-house experts.

58 THE LADY 17 MARCH 2017

london_auctions.indd 58 13/03/2017 13:37


FITNESS & WELLBEING with Diana Moran
Our feet are often neglected, but it is important to keep them in top shape
F eet are the most overworked
part of our bodies, constantly
supporting our mass and taking the
stresses and strains throughout our life. When we walk,
the pressure exerted on our feet is twice our weight, so
its no wonder our poor soles complain! Major causes of
problems are badly fitting shoes and the neglect of corns
and bunions. Bunions, a deformity of the big toe joint,
require treatment and advice from a chiropodist. Minor
foot problems such as corns can also become major
discomforts, which could impair our future mobility
and threaten our physical independence.
When legs and feet feel tired, our whole body seems
weary and life becomes more of an effort, so for healthy
feet and legs we need adequate exercise. When were active
the calf muscle acts as a pump, helping
blood in the lower leg flow back towards
the heart. Resting with your legs up high
(feet above heart level) will improve
circulation, which is especially helpful for
people with leg ulcers and varicose veins.
If swollen ankles are problematic,
graduated support hosiery can assist by
fitting tightly at the ankle, encouraging
Your feet are constant workers,
blood to flow back to the heart instead of
so reward them appropriately
pooling around ankles and feet. Fitting
THE TECH DOCTOR by Miles Waghorn
Streaming means you can always be up to date with the latest TV episode
B eing online has dramatically
changed how we enjoy TV,
films and radio, creating many ways
to listen and watch at our convenience. Much of this
progress is down to streaming watching or listening to
something without having to download it. The benefits
of this are the ability to access everything from live
radio to classic films quickly and easily, as well as the
fact it needs far less storage space on your device.
Paying your TV licence grants access to more
than you may realise. The BBCs iPlayer lets you
watch live TV or catch up on missed programmes
from your computer, tablet, smartphone or even
smart TV, if you have one. Download the free
app or search on Google for iPlayer, then browse
TV and radio shows via category, popularity
and more. One of my favourite features is the
ability to download your choice of shows when
youre connected to the internet, then watch
or listen to them on the move when theres
no Wi-Fi available. You can enjoy the dulcet
tones of Sir David Attenboroughs voice on that
long train or plane journey, instead of the crying child in
row seven. Most major TV companies, like Channel 4,
also have their own free catch-up service.
Sky or Virgin TV customers have access to Sky Go or
Virgin TV Anywhere similar to iPlayer, but for the shows
iSTOCK
and channels included in your package. In addition to
this, on-demand subscription services such as Netflix and
Diana TechDoc_Mar17 v2.indd 59
ADVICE COLUMNS
services are available in some chemists or by foot experts,
but because support hosiery is more expensive your GP
may prescribe it for you. Support hosiery is particularly
beneficial in preventing deep vein thrombosis (DVT),
a risk for some people, especially on long-haul flights.
Keep your feet clean to prevent infection and get rid
of dead, hard skin by using a pumice stone or chiropody
file. For moist feet wear socks made from natural fibres
such as cotton or wool, which absorb moisture, unlike
synthetic materials. Avoid ingrown toenails by clipping
your nails straight across once a month, and use an
emery board to file and prevent snags. Most corns
and calluses can be treated at home, but if they fail
to respond to treatment or cause discomfort, ask your
GP to refer you to a qualified chiropodist.
Troublesome athletes foot is
a contagious fungal infection that
grows in moist conditions, but home
remedies are available. Verrucas are
common on the soles of feet or around
the toe area, and are often picked
up by bare feet from damp floors of
public swimming pools or communal
showers that harbour fungus. As they
are painful and stubborn to remove,
its best to treat them professionally.
Amazon Prime Video give you access to thousands of
TV shows and films, for a small monthly fee.
So youve got access to all this great entertainment,
but how do you enjoy it on your big screen? Streaming
devices that enable you to watch programmes and films
from the internet on your existing TV are popular. Theres
no monthly fee and they use apps for watching things,
like video streaming website YouTube or the previously
mentioned paid subscription services. I recommend the
Roku 3 for functionality and ease of use. My retired
father likes the straightforward menus and chunky
buttons, as well as the voice search function,
which avoids laborious on-screen keyboards.
Another option to watch something from your
small screen on your big one is simply plugging your
laptop into the TV. Most Windows laptops have
a video port on the side called an HDMI, as does
nearly every TV. Simply purchase an HDMI-to-HDMI
cable to connect the two, and change the source on
your TV to the relevant input. If you have an Apple
laptop (MacBook), youll need an additional adaptor.
Just remember to check the cable is long enough!
So now youve got access to what you want to watch and
when you want to watch it, theres no need to put up with
mediocre programming or miniature screens any longer.
u Next week: Entertainment Part II music and radio.
If you have a question for Miles, write in to the usual Bedford
Street address or email editors@lady.co.uk. Miles Waghorn
runs techsilver.co.uk, a website for those new to technology.
17 MARCH 2017 THE LADY 59
13/03/2017 13:42
 REVIEWS
Books BOO
OF T K
HE
WE
EK
OUT NOW they divorced when
WEAR AND TEAR: Tynan was only 13.
THE THREADS OF Structured around
MY LIFE by Tracy favourite pieces she has
Tynan (Duckworth worn during different
Overlook, 18.99) eras of her life bikinis,
apple-green shoes,
As a child, Hollywood Ossie Clark dresses
costume designer Tracy Tynans memoir is
Tynan was left with
a succession of au pairs,
most riveting when
she recounts growing In pursuit of Pound
while her jet-setting up with her appalling THE BUGHOUSE: THE POETRY,
parents partied non- parents. They may have POLITICS AND MADNESS OF EZRA
stop with literary and been monsters, but POUND by Daniel Swift (Harvill Secker, 25)
theatrical celebrities they certainly gave her Ezra Pound did not like to be the subject but
of 1950s and 1960s plenty to write about. the teacher, suggests Daniel Swift in his book
London and New York. A highly entertaining on the American poet and indeed he eludes
Theatre critic Kenneth page-turner. attempts at biography, even one as alternative
Tynan, author of the hit Rebecca Wallersteiner as this. A non-linear narrative of Pounds
musical Oh! Calcutta!, literary life, it draws on the observations
and novelist wife Elaine THE KILLER by of his visitors while he held court for fellow
Dundy were both Susan Wilkins poets from a psychiatric hospital ward.
flamboyant, extrovert (Macmillan, 12.99) After being pronounced insane following
and glamorous. At night, his controversial wartime radio broadcasts
they fought savagely, In the final instalment from Mussolinis Italy, we encounter Pound
flinging pasta and of Wilkinss thrilling in court, described as a traitor and a genius,
smashing crockery and crime trilogy, featuring watched by the young Charles Olson, who
each others bones. ex-cop Nicci Armstrong wonders about reaching him. This is how
Watching them was like and misunderstood Pound emerges throughout the book: brilliant
watching a horror movie, criminal Kaz Phelps, and compelling, but untouchable and even
scary but riveting, pulses are set racing repellent. Seen through his visitors questing
Tracy Tynan writes. from the first chapter: gaze, Pound comes in and out of focus,
Although she felt a revenge-motivated reincarnated in his contemporaries poetry
disturbed and longed shoot-out at a family and dissected in medical reports. Even in
for a normal family, funeral catapults the a long-standing friends account, he is loudly
Tynan missed the two female characters mute. Swift also attempts to confront him
drama when she left into action. They more directly by going amongst modern-day
home. Her parents gallop around London, Poundists, and the results are sometimes
equated the ordinary lurching from the uncomfortable his devotees of today
with being boring, and backstreets of the East interpret him variously, often reverently.
boredom was to be End to the mansions Ultimately, Swift admits that he cannot
avoided at all costs. In of Holland Park and pin his elusive subject down, but there is no
the chaotic household, everywhere in between, need. By following his instinct he has allowed
her nervous, chain- encountering networks the poet, with his shifting self-narration, to
smoking father was of organised crime at lead the way in this marvellous evocation.
forever struggling each turn. Philippa Williams
WHICH to meet his United by their desire
BOOK BEGINS
deadlines and to convict the seemingly
The sun shone placate her untouchable Russian that builds credibility use of pacey prose and
on, having no irritable, gangster Pudovkin as the narrative unfolds. short chapters enables
unpredictable (whose malefic presence An assortment of new the action-packed
alternative, on the mother. They is the epicentre of many characters and complex plot to fizz along and
nothing new drank heavily conflicts), Kaz and Nicci agendas are regularly gather page-turning
Answer on and brought develop an unlikely introduced, adding momentum as it hurtles
page 81 home lovers. and at some points a greater depth and towards its final
Unsurprisingly, uneasy relationship sophistication. Wilkins denouement. Although

60 THE LADY 17 MARCH 2017

Books DPS Mar17 v1.indd 60 13/03/2017 13:24

 BOOKS FILM T H E AT R E RADIO A RT TELEVISION MUSIC

ALSO ON
THE SHELF
COFFEE TABLE BOOK

there are instances DANIEL LISMORE: BE YOURSELF, EVERYONE ELSE IS ALREADY

of clich largely TAKEN by Paula Wallace and Hilary Alexander (Skira Rizzoli, 40)
surrounding the two
female protagonists Daniel Lismore is one of the most divine distractions one could hope
Wilkins has created an to meet: a designer, model, stylist and artist, his visual and personal
unnervingly plausible statement of intent has been captured beautifully in this lavish book,
criminal underworld, a unique, luscious and often comedic costume autobiography, published
where even the police to coincide with his first
have no jurisdiction. museum exhibition
Lilly Cox in the US. Lismore is
living art, and this tome TELL ME
PAPERBACKS features 32 ensembles A LIE by CJ
YUKI CHAN IN (not enough!) from his Carver (Bonnier
BRONT COUNTRY 4,000 extraordinary Zaffre, 7.99)
by Mick Jackson components. In rock star
(Faber & Faber, 7.99) Debbie Harrys words, In this thriller
we want more, more, by the author
A young Japanese more of Lismore. Using of last years
woman travels to furnishing fabrics, vintage dazzling debut,
Yorkshire, retracing lace, clock coils, chain Spare Me
her late mothers mail, button badges, brass the Truth,
journey, in this quirky, dance fingernails, sequins amnesia-struck
fresh and absorbing and soft toys though not agent Dan
novel. On a coach trip quite a kitchen sink, yet Forrester and
to Haworth with a group Lismore does indeed gutsy PC Lucy
of Bront-obsessed prove that more is more. Davies return
elderly Japanese ladies, Stephen Fry sums him to the fray.
twenty-something up in one word: Genius. This time they
Yukis quest is not for Robin Dutt face a Russian
memorabilia of the oligarch, deal
literary sisters, but for with a gruesome
events from a decade BLOOD & FAITH: Moorish occupation Catholic hegemony and murder, and
ago that may have led THE PURGING OF was a slow process, the fear of losing such ancome up
to her mothers death. MUSLIM SPAIN 1492- culminating in the economically productive against danger
Equipped with old 1614 by Matthew Carr recapture of Granada population. This is closer to home.
photos, an OS map and (Hurst & Co., 12.99) in 1492. Carrs book a challenging and The thinking
a sharp, lateral-thinking examines the fate of the fascinating subject, but womans
brain, she embarks on The re-conquest of Muslim inhabitants of Carr does it no justice. whodunnit.
an investigative mission Southern Spain by its the liberated territories, The main problem is his JC
to unravel the mystery, Christian monarchs exploring the conflict failure to appreciate the
while struggling to cope after centuries of between a desire for medieval mind in both
with her loss. But the Islamic and Christian
driving force of the story cultures, and his horror
isnt so much the plot that they dont conform
as Yukis musings by to 21st-century European
turns hilarious, poignant values. His reductive
and endearingly bonkers approach also
as she picks her way doesnt produce
through a painful past any significant
and observes everyday insights, and
English life with the analogy
baffled amusement. with present-
Sprinkled with humour day issues
and eccentricity, this is superficial.
is a beautifully written Guardian
exploration of grieving editorial meets
and identity. O level history. GUESS THE COVER
Juanita Coulson Stephen Coulson Answer on page 81

17 MARCH 2017 THE LADY 61

Books DPS Mar17 v1.indd 61 13/03/2017 13:25

 BOOKS FILM T H E AT R E RADIO A RT TELEVISION MUSIC

AUDIO THE LADYS RECIPE READS

BOOK OF
THE WEEK The flavours of the Middle East are an uplifting counterpoint to the
regions troubles. By Juanita Coulson
FANTASTIC
BEASTS AND THE ALEPPO COOKBOOK: THE ENCHANTINGLY EASY
WHERE TO Celebrating the Legendary PERSIAN COOKBOOK: 100 Simple
FIND THEM Cuisine of Syria by Marlene Matar Recipes for Beloved Persian Food
by JK Rowling (Head of Zeus, 30) Favorites by Shadi Hasanzade-
(Audible, 12) It features in todays collective Nemati (Rockridge Press, 14.64)
From imagination as a site of devastation, Food blogger Shadi HasanzadeNemati
hippogriffs to but as one of the oldest continuously showcases her heirloom recipes,
basilisks, this inhabited cities in the world, Aleppo inspired by memories of cinnamon
is a weirdly has a rich cultural history and and saffron scents in her mothers
wonderful tour a distinctive cuisine. The one dish kitchen. Fragrant and delicate, Persian
around the you are likely to know among the dishes can seem daunting, not least
magical 2o0 recipes is muhammara, a because of unfamiliar ingredients,
menagerie of fragrant red pepper and walnut #lady but the book tackles sourcing and
Harry Potters dip that appears in the more recipe preparation head-on. Recipes are
wizardly world adventurous mezze menus here.
reads signposted according to their
a set text at Cordon Bleu-trained chef Marlene difficulty, with Worth the wait
Hogwarts, no Matar is a celebrity in the Arab world; labels for the more challenging ones.
less! Eddie her TV appearances and cookery There is an introduction on Persian
Redmayne, classes are hugely popular. Matars culture and history, and notes about
who starred beautifully illustrated cookbook is each dish. Pomegranate and walnut
in the film, a love letter to the city, reminding meatballs, and saffron and rose tea,
brings it to life us that there is so much more to the are among the aromatic delights in
in a superbly Levant than what we see in the news. this warm and un-cheffy cookbook.
expressive
reading. JC Tweet us your recipe reads @TheLadyMagazine using #ladyrecipereads

In this series, THIS WEEK I AM READING

notable
writers tell us
about their
Sabrina Mahfouz
reading The British-Egyptian poet, performer and playwright on a shape-shifting urban epic
habits. Is
there someone weaves itself into the To Sweeten Bitter by
you would like fabric of the people, who Raymond Antrobus,
to see in turn make it what it is. Swing Time by Zadie
featured? I love how Kates writing Smith, and Once Upon
Write to us flows from dialogue to a Time in the East by
with your exquisite poetics to Xiaolu Guo.
suggestions. political inquisitions Which books or authors
to rap lyrics. have influenced you
Do you have a favourite most? Writers Nawal El
reading spot? At this Saadawi, Laura Dockrill,
time in my life, any spot F Scott Fitzgerald,
I can manage to get a Naguib Mahfouz,
few moments reading Henrik Ibsen and
is a favourite spot! Debbie Tucker Green.
Kindle or heaving Living Dolls: The
bookshelves? Return of Sexism by
Heaving bookshelves, Natasha Walter. In the
every time. Completely Eye of the Sun by Ahdaf
impractical but Soueif. Happiness by
Tell us about what you of her album of the same absolutely essential to Jack Underwood.
are reading Im always title have been published a warm heart and home. u The Things I Would
reading about six books by Picador and Ive Whats on your reading Tell You:British Muslim
at once, but the one in my enjoyed the urgent, list for spring? Women Write, edited by
pocket at the moment is lyrical observations she Heterogeneous by Sabrina Mahfouz, is
Let Them Eat Chaos by makes on the city Im Anthony Anaxagorou, published in April by Saqi
Kate Tempest. The lyrics from the way London Plum by Hollie McNish, Books, priced 12.99.

62 THE LADY 17 MARCH 2017

Books_Film Mar17 v2.indd 62 13/03/2017 13:27

 Film
WOMEN
BEHAVING
BADLY
Theres gentle humour and
warmth at the heart of this
antiques roadshow
Jason
Solomons
THE TIME OF THEIR LIVES
Dame Joan Collins breaks out of
the retirement home in search of
one last shot at stardom in twinkly
British pensioner caper The Time
of Their Lives.
Dame Joan isnt playing herself,
though she might as well be, cast as
a former 1960s starlet called Helen
Shelley, who fell on hard times
and hard drink but who, through
layers of lipstick, clings to her former
glamour even while boarding a coach
for the OAP homes annual trip to
the seaside.
Escape is on Helens ever-
dramatic mind. She wants to sneak
off to France to the funeral of an
old director friend because le tout
Hollywood will be there and she
reckons she can still wangle herself
a final film job.
Getting caught up in Helens
delusion is Priscilla, played by
Pauline Collins, the British film
worlds go-to frustrated housewife.
We see her mourning a long-dead
son, much to the annoyance of her
grumpy husband (Ronald Pickup,
whose career did pick up after The
Best Exotic Marigold Hotel films,
although hes still rather a miserable
git to watch).
Through some badly contrived
mishap, Priscilla ends up on the
coach with Helen, whom she
recognises and then reveals to that
shes a big fan, which self-satisfies
Helen no end. The pair make a flit
to France, all of which involves a
ferry, jokes about driving on the
wrong side of the road, and a
Books_Film Mar17 v2.indd 63
life-saving moment that turns them
into celebrities in the French media.
Somehow, our Thelma &
Louise-style pair steal a car but end
up bickering on a country lane, where
they are saved by a knight in a 2CV,
who takes them to his modernist-
adapted chateau. Sacr bleu, its
Franco Nero, who, frankly, has had
more work done than said chateau.
He plays Italian artist Alberto
Rosetti, fabulously wealthy but
lonely, and under the strict
administration of a bossy nurse.
Nevertheless, he entertains the
ladies, taking a shine to homely
Priscilla, much to Helens irritation.
Theres time for some badly
over-played marijuana smoking,
a skinny dip, and a few home truths
before they all set off for the beautiful
Ile de R and the funeral of, so it
transpires, Helens director on her
first hit, a stylish 1960s romp called
Morty and Me (Sophie Ellis-Bextor
Were looking forward to you being a
great loss to the organisation.
Dame Joan as faded
star Helen Shelley
sings the Sir Tim Rice-penned
theme tune to this fake hit over the
end credits, and you really must
stay for the lyrics).
Look, this film, written and
directed by Roger Goldby, is pretty
ropey, occasionally not much better
than a Last of the Summer Wine
special. However, powered by the
sheer determination of its stars, it
retains charm and potent emotions.
Although the two Collins never
quite zing off each other as they
should, Dame Joan is really
something when given room. She
does a boozy, brassy, yet brittle
rendition of an Anthony Newley
song, a scene that ranks alongside
some of the best work shes ever
delivered on screen, and the shots
of her scraping off make-up and
defiantly deconstructing her wig are
equally powerful, proper grande
dame material.
Meanwhile, Pauline still has a
wonderful softness in those eyes
that makes her eventual triumph
of self-determination something to
cheer, just as it was all those years
ago in Shirley Valentine.
With the dappled French
locations, the presence of Joely
Richardson (Neros real-life
stepdaughter), and two great British
actresses seizing a couple of juicy
and all-too-rare parts, there is gentle
humour and a wistfulness here,
with moments of genuine heart
that pierce through any shoddiness
even if a pacemaker might have
helped it beat a little faster.
17 MARCH 2017 THE LADY 63
13/03/2017 13:27
 BOOKS FILM T H E AT R E
Theatre
POLITICAL INTRIGUE
This kitchen-sink drama goes behind the scenes
on the formation of the Social Democratic Party
Georgina
Brown
LIMEHOUSE
American Debbie Owen, a literary
agent, confesses in the new play
Limehouse she never intended to
marry a Brit, a doctor or a
politician. Yet she married all three
in Dr David Owen the dishy,
arrogant, tricky member of the
Gang of Four, nickname of the
Labour moderates behind the
Social Democratic Party (SDP).
Perhaps that should have been
five, for in Steve Waters play, it was
Mrs Owen who literally cooked up
the SDP in January 1981, in the
Owens river-view kitchen in
Limehouse (they were pioneers in
the middle-class migration to East
London). It was she, after all, who
suggested hosting the lunch of a
warm, companionable macaroni
cheese, jazzed up with a creamy
sauce and a topping of breadcrumbs
a new recipe from a client, a
certain Delia Smith and a bottle
of Chteau Lafite, Roy Jenkinss
favourite tipple, as well as
instructing her easily irritated
husband to show his guests he
loves each one of them.
Delias dish goes down a treat
with Shirley Williams, whose cold
Tom
Goodman-
Hill as David
64 THE LADY 17 MARCH 2017
Theatre_Art Mar17 v2.indd 64
RADIO
suppers suggest she was not much
of a cook. An enthusiastic Bill
Rodgers has seconds and says,
Maybe she embodies the spirit of
what were about. Declass,
pragmatic, which sounds spot on
to me.
I have to declare a bit of an
interest in all this. When I married
my husband a week before the
General Election in 1983, he was
standing for the SDP in Dudley
East, in the West Midlands. We
had a honeymoon night in Wales
and then he returned to the
hustings. I went back to work in CD OF BOOK AHEAD
THE WEEK
London. The SDP won 25 per cent
of the total vote. My husband stood GOKS ANCIENT EGYPT: A
again in 1987 (another bronze DIVAS: JOURNEY THROUGH TIME
medal) and we all went on hoping Various This exhibition brings together
and canvassing until the SDP artists, 9.99 one of the UKs most significant
crashed out in the 1990s and ever www.amazon. collections of Egyptian
since, but more so since Brexit, co.uk Fashion antiquities. From 28 April at
weve been wondering, What if? guru and World Museum, William Brown
Limehouse is a good but not a presenter Street, Liverpool: 0151-478 4393,
great play, lacking real drama and Gok Wan first www.liverpoolmuseums.org.uk
failing to be more than about discovered
anything but itself. But it tells a opera in the WOMEN AND THE ROYAL
fascinating chapter of history, 1980s after NAVY: PIONEERS TO
powerfully demonstrating how hearing PROFESSIONALS
four people come to the same Delibes The A celebration of women in the
position anti-Left, pro-Europe, Flower Duet naval services over the past 250
anti-CND with each eloquently in a film called years. From 18 February at The
explaining their very different path The Hunger, National Museum of the Royal
to get there. starring Navy, Portsmouth Historic
In Polly Findlays brilliantly Catherine Dockyard: 023-9383 9760,
performed production, Roger Deneuve and www.nmm.org.uk
Allams quietly wancorous Woy David Bowie.
Jenkins swills words as he swills With this MOZART IN THE
wine. A delicious Debra Gillett CD, he has AFTERNOON
makes Dame Shirley Williams the chosen Escape the evening rush with
national treasure she is. Tom 30 favourites The Beecham Orchestra. From 4
Goodman-Hill is every inch the sung by Maria April at Cadogan Hall, Sloane
exasperated patrician Lord Owen Callas, Dame Terrace, London SW1: 020-7730
continues to be. And Paul Kiri Te 4500, www.cadoganhall.com
Chahidis Bill Rodgers, the least Kanawa and
well known of the four, turns out many others
to be a Marmite-sandwich and gin- in a double
loving, passionate politician and album that
a real sweetie. a showcases
u Until 15 April at Donmar operas
Warehouse, Earlham Street, sumptuous
London WC2: 0844-871 7624, grandeur.
Wren despatch riders
www.donmarwarehouse.com GS
13/03/2017 19:18

AND LAST CHANCE
SCOTT BRADLEES
POSTMODERN JUKEBOX
Enjoy modern-day hits from
the charts, re-imagined with an
old-school sound, from 1930s jazz
to doo-wop. From 23-24 March at
Eventim Apollo Hammersmith,
Queen Caroline Street, London
W6: 0844-249 4300, www.
eventimapollo.com
LOCKWOOD KIPLING:
ARTS AND CRAFTS IN THE
PUNJAB AND LONDON
A show about the life of
Lockwood Kipling, who shaped
the original V&A collection and
also helped decorate the South
Kensington building. His
portrait can be seen in a
mosaic by the museums John
Madejski garden. Until 2
April at Victoria & Albert
Museum, London SW7:
020-7942 2000, www. My friend Serge
vam.ac.uk
has bought a
EVITA
Sir Tim Rice and Sir
Andrew Lloyd Webbers
BRINKHOFF MGENBURG
extraordinary musical
embarks on a national tour.
From 28 March-1 April at Grand
Opera House, Cumberland
Street, York: 01904-678714,
www.atgtickets.com/venues/
grand-opera-house-york
Theatre_Musical Mar17 v2.indd 65
A RT TELEVISION
Musical
DREAM A LITTLE DREAM
The barnstorming Motown-inspired musical is
a well-oiled machine that doesnt let up on the action
Richard
Barber
DREAMGIRLS
Thirty-five years after it debuted
on Broadway and a decade on from
the film, Dreamgirls book and
The cast lyrics by Tom Eyen, music by
of Dreamgirls Henry Krieger arrived here before
Christmas and is now firmly
entrenched in Londons beautiful
Savoy Theatre. Judging by the
reception of a packed house on
a Wednesday in mid-March,
its likely still to be there come
this Christmas.
So does it deserve its reputation?
On balance, yes. Its about as subtle
as a sledgehammer but its a
nonetheless slick, well-oiled
machine. Three girls loosely based
on the Supremes start their career
as backing singers before moving
into the spotlight as headliners. By
then, pretty, slim Deena (Liisi
LaFontaine) has moved centre
stage at the expense of well-
nourished Effie, even though the
latter has a voice that could shatter
a chandelier at a hundred paces.
On the night I saw it, Effie was
played by Marisha Wallace,
standing in for an indisposed
Amber Riley, and a barnstorming
WHICH performance she gave, too.
PLAY BEGINS Effies the one youre rooting
for from the off, the very
embodiment of all thats
sassy. Shes also a match
for Curtis Taylor Jr., the
painting talent-scout-turned-Svengali-
manager with the moral code
Answer on of a snake-oil salesman. Hes
page 81
well played by Joe Aaron Reid
who attracted a satisfying chorus
of boos at the curtain call.
Theres a lso a terrif ic
performance from Adam J. Bernard
as Jimmy Early (channelling Chuck
Berry) with his eye-watering splits
MUSIC
and Moonwalk-style dance moves.
I also liked the diminutive Tyrone
Huntley (so good as Judas in last
summers open-air production of
Jesus Christ Superstar in Regents
Park), who plays Effies somewhat
put-upon brother, C.C. White.
But the evening belongs to Effie.
Her first act closing number, And
I Am Telling You Im Not Going,
is so powerful, it had the audience
on its feet during her performance.
And her altogether more wistful
rendition of I Am Changing in the
second half merely demonstrates
Wallaces vocal range.
Directed and choreographed by
Casey Nicholaw, the action never
lets up, and it sure looks the part
courtesy of Tim Hatleys fast-
moving, sparkly sets and Gregg
Barness jaw-dropping costumes.
All of which somewhat masks the
predictability of the story. Will
Deena break free from Curtiss
vice-like grip? Will she and Effie
be reconciled? Will Effie take her
rightful place back in the girl
group? Well, what do you think?
Enjoy the ride!
u Until 21 October at the Savoy
Theatre, Strand, London WC2:
0844-871 7687, www.dreamgirls
westend.com. London cast album
is available on Sony Classical in
mid-April.
Loosely based on the Supremes,
the Dreamgirls get fame,
fortune and heartache
17 MARCH 2017 THE LADY 65
13/03/2017 19:39
 BOOKS FILM T H E AT R E
Television
CENTENNIAL
CELEBRATION
A retrospective on Dame
Veras major milestone
Ben
Felsenburg
Happy 100th Birthday Dame
Vera Lynn (Saturday, BBC2,
9pm) is a joyous celebration of
the woman whose soaring voice
gave us hope during the nations
darkest hour. But as Dame Vera
is joined by her daughter Virginia
for a trip far down memory lane,
its also proof of the humour
and humility that made her
the most deserving of stars.
What does the great Dame
think as she looks at photos and
film footage of herself during the
war, more than 70 years ago?
How slim I was! she quips. Its a stunning figure in khaki when
Radio
OLD DOG,
NEW TRICKS
Louis keeps an ear out for
Brian Matthews successor
Louis
Barfe
Only one thing stops me saying
that Tony Blackburn is in his
rightful place as Brian Matthews
successor on Radio 2s Sounds
of the Sixties. Its that SOTS
is no longer in its rightful
place, having been moved from
8am on a Saturday to 6am to
accommodate Dermot OLeary.
Im sure bosses will argue that
scheduling matters less now with
66 THE LADY 17 MARCH 2017
TV_Radio_Mar17 v2.indd 66
RADIO A RT TELEVISION MUSIC
NOT TO BE
MISSED
SCRUFFTS
(Friday,
Channel 4,
8pm)
Forget the pure
elites as six
finalists drawn
from more
than a thousand
Dame Vera, with daughter Virginia
canine entrants
compete for the
up to others to celebrate her she ventured out to Burma to title of Britains
brilliance. Sir Paul McCartney, serenade Britains soldiers. It was Favourite
Sir Tim Rice and Miriam a destination that no entertainer Family
Margolyes are among those had braved before her during Crossbreed Dog.
adding their voices to the chorus the war, but with characteristic
of effusive praise, but perhaps phlegmatism, Dame Vera
the neatest turn of phrase comes remembers not the perils and
from Dame Edna Everage creator privations, but simply that she
Barry Humphries: She made learnt how make-up and a perm
patriotism sexy. dont suit the jungle.
Its a view backed up by the Watch and your admiration and
pictures of the singer in her early liking for Dame Vera will only be VERA (Sunday,
twenties posing in a snazzy hat enhanced. As McCartney says, ITV, 8pm)
besides her Austin 10, and cutting Shes like a family member, even Brenda Blethyn
though youve never met. is back as
bad-tempered
DCI Vera
Stanhope for
a new four-
part series,
starting with
the case of a
iPlayer, but not everybody is the first show with Flowers in the woman found
online. Given the nostalgic nature Rain by the Move, the record with murdered on
of the show, I suspect many of which he opened Radio 1. a remote island.
what Brian Matthew used to Pleasingly, SOTS is now live,
call the avids will be resolutely and Blackburn fields tweets and
analogue listeners. If I were emails. Im taking a long view
cynical, Id conclude that the on whether the level of joyous
suits were trying to kill SOTS. obscurities is maintained it
I hope they dont succeed. should and must be. The mix of
Our old mates departure was favourites, B-sides and one-flop
emotional, Matthew being wonders was what made the show. THREE
clearly moved as he did his final Thankfully, I trust Phil The WIVES, ONE
announcement. I nearly went Collector Swern to maintain HUSBAND
too as the show closed with the standards, and happily, hes an (Thursday,
long-serving theme, Foot Tapper on-air presence in the Collectors Channel 4, 9pm)
by the Shadows, in full. Colossal Collection feature. The incredible
Toe Knee Black Burn has Also, if Brian Matthews final privates lives
ditched Foot Tapper (fair enough), announcement is to be believed, of a Mormon
but its a shame he hasnt revived hell be back with some specials community
his own 1960s theme, Beefeaters in the near-future. Good its in Utah are
by John Dankworth and his the least Radio 2 can do after the revealed in this
Orchestra. Also, his talkover bed shabby way he was treated. eye-opening
sounds wrong and is more like u Louis on Twitter: @LFBarfe or documentary
1970s funk. He did, however, open email: wireless@cheeseford.net series.
13/03/2017 13:38
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WFF_GF_Lady_133x190mm.indd 1 16/02/2017 09:22

Untitled-12 67 13/03/2017 17:08

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CORNWALL & ISLES OF
SCILLY See advertisements online at www.lady.co.uk
MEVAGISSEY - SEAVIEW
Bungalow. 3 bedrooms. Parking,
Close to Heligan. Tel. 07774 689600 DERBYSHIRE DEVON
ST. IVES/HAYLE Grade II listed
cottage, village location, 3 LUXURY CONVERTED BARN, STRETE - DARTMOUTH - Garden
bedrooms, large garden, ideal sleeps 4.No smoking, no pets. Near cottage, sleeps 2. Adjacent coastal
family holiday. Tel. 07960 351717 Bakewell. Tel. 01629 812945 footpath, National Nature Reserve,
www.cornishcottage-sterth.co.uk www.bosgincottage.net beautiful beaches.
Tel. 01803 770132
DORSET www.the-garden-cottage.co.uk
SPRING/SUMMER - Cottage in
beautiful Sidmouth. Luxury two
bed cottage near seafront.
Tel. 01386 833412
www.goldiescottagesidmouth.com
ESSEX
SAFFRON WALDEN - Modern
house, double room own
bathroom, B and B, evening meal
possible. Text or phone.
07811 010767
GLOUCESTERSHIRE,
Tranquil coastal retreat for ultimate relaxation. 5 award winning cottages (sleep 2 - 8). OXFORDSHIRE &
Traditional village pubs 5 mins walk. Hive Beach 20 mins stroll. At the heart of the
Jurassic Coast, 2.5 hrs from London. Options for short breaks/10 day stays.
BERKSHIRE
COTSWOLDS - Picturesque
Book online www.norburtonhall.com
Broadway. Luxury period Bungalow
info@norburtonhall.com Telephone +44 (0)1308 897007
cottage. Garden. Parking.
Tel. 01386 852040
GLOUCESTERSHIRE, OXFORDSHIRE & BERKSHIRE
www.barncottagebroadway.com
COTSWOLD STONE COTTAGE.
Rural setting, central heating,
kingham cottages
sleeps 4.
For a fabulous stay in the Cotswolds
Tel. 01452 770407
5 fabulous self-catering cottages for par ties of BEAUTIFUL HOLIDAY Cottage.
2-28 set in 6 acres of beautiful gardens with a Sleeps 2. Stunning setting. Truly
heated indoor pool and unique Hammam.
Disabled friendly. luxury accommodation.
Contact: 01608 658 226
www.pauntleycourt.com
www.kinghamcottages.com Tel. 07798 865979
Email: melissa@pauntleycourt.com
CLASSIFIED ENQUIRIES 020 7379 4717 CLASSIFIED.ADS@LADY.CO.UK
13/03/2017 18:32

HEREFORDSHIRE & SURREY, SUSSEX & KENT
WORCESTERSHIRE MRS MAXTONE-GRAHAM'S
PERSHORE - Delightful 4* cottage, 6 small almhouses (1805) in her
peaceful location. Heated outdoor quiet garden, historic Cinque Port
pool. Tel. 01386 561213 of Sandwich. For 2+. Free parking,
www.garthcottage.co.uk Wi-Fi. 310-390pw, min 2 nights
150. Tel. 01304 613270
www.sandwichcottages.co.uk
www.lady.co.uk BATTLE , CHALET in quiet country
setting, good dog walking, no
roads passing. Scenic countryside,
historic buildings nearby, good
ISLE OF MAN
local culture. Short breaks.
B & B ACCOMMODATION, Tel. 01435 831048 /
traditional cottage close to beach, 077 833 70856
all amenities.
Contact Tel. 07624 305703 WALES
OVERSEAS
FRANCE
LANGUEDOC - Lovely Villa. Idyllic
setting. Private pool/garden. Sleeps
6-7. www.lespavots.co.uk
SW FRANCE - Charming stone
built 18th century property. 1 level, 2
en-suite bedrooms, slps 4/5. Wifi.
Ideal for couples & friends.
Excellent restaurant nearby.
Convenient Autoroute & Toulouse
airport. www.bordeslongues.com
Tel. 07799 690693
CLASSIFIED ADVERTISEMENTS
LANGUEDOC VILLA. Stunning
location. Peaceful, natural, totally
rejuvenating. Secluded pool,
mountain bikes provided,
fascinating region. Vineyards,
markets, restaurants, lake.
www.languedocholidayvlllas.co.uk
CAP FERRAT - Studio sleeps 2,
Pool, Beaches, Shops. Beautiful
position. Tel. 07768 633321 Email:
lizzie@russellswater.fsnet.co.uk

GWYNFRYN ORGANIC FARM - 12

SOMERSET & WILTSHIRE
SOMERSET, MENDIPS - C17th
beamed cottage. Views, Grounds.
Pets. N/S. Tel. 01749 841153 www.
holidaycottagesouthwest.co.uk
self catering cottages, heated pool,
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Beauty, where mountains meet the
sea. Tel. 01758 612536
www.gwynfrynfarm.co.uk

SCOTLAND
Callac Lake
HIGHLANDS
Grantown on Spey - Cairngorm National Park. PEACEFUL CENTRAL BRITTANY Language Holiday
Brush up your French or start from scratch with a week in the comfortable home of your
hostess and tutor, a retired English headmistress. Home cooking, French and English;
gentle but thorough teaching (about 3 hours a day); opportunities to practise with
friendly locals and to discover this lovely region. Double bedroom overlooking the
market square of a sleepy Breton village. Private bathroom and the run of house and
garden. Individuals or 2 people sharing.

Telephone for brochure : 00 33 2964 55748

Beautiful Victorian Country House.

Eze Village, Cote DAzur.
Six luxury bedrooms. Award winning restaurant, fine wines, rare malts. Between Nice and Monaco.
Ideal base Osprey, Whisky, walking, golf, fishing River Spey or for sheer relaxation.

Spring Break Offer - March/April - 3 nights 85.00pppn

or 4 nights 80.00pppn inclusive of dinner. (terms apply)

Tel. 01479 872106 www.culdearn.com

HOLIDAY HOMES WANTED

30 mins airport. Modern 2 bedroom apartment sleeps 4. Fully equipped inc. Wifi.
Large communal pool, garage, resident concierge. Magnificent view over medieval village,
sea and Cap Ferrat. 15 mins beach, 30 mins Italian border, 3 mins walk to village shops.
Website: www.ezevillage.co.uk
Contact: Flavia Tel. 07796170231 Email: Flaviacoppack@yahoo.co.uk

GREECE
CRETE, unspoilt beautiful sea edge www.lady.co.uk
location. Couples/families.
Tel. 01626 777226
http://www.crete.moonfruit.com ITALY
Many KEFALONIA - Stylish B & B, English
properties family home, sumptuous TUSCAN VILLA with private pool/
AS SEEN
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40 bookings www.thegardenhouse.gr www.holiday-villa-in-tuscany.com
Email: leemilne@hotmail.com Yoga, cooking lessons, horse riding

Earn more from your property INDIA

LEARN TO COOK and have a
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Personal service from a letting expert based in your area Tel. 020 8133 0907
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Trusted by thousands of cottage owners
23 million website visits each year IRELAND
Free property listing on over 500 partner websites including Booking.com CONNEMARA - Self-catering on
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cottages.com/let-your-property www.cc-cottages.com
Tel. 00 353(0) 95 41844
available. Flat with Lake Como
views.
Tel. 0039 349 501 8679
ALASSIO, ITALIAN RIVIERA
- Elegant beachfront, apartment
sleeps 4, own garden from 600
euros weekly.
Email: villairis.italy@gmail.com
Tel. 07554 366402
BEAUTIFUL VILLA Abruzzo, idyllic
3 bed home in Torino Di Sangro,
stunning views, pool, near
beautiful mountains, good
restaurants.
Email: vivstevens@gmail.com

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 CLASSIFIED ADVERTISEMENTS
ITALY VILLAS

UNIQUE CULINARY
ADVENTURES IN SICILY
Aeolian Adventures offers unique cooking
and wine-tasting holidays in Sicily. A seven
night six-day all-inclusive gastronomical
tour with cooking lessons, wine tastings and
trips to local producers. Our destination, RESIDENTIAL & BUSINESS
the Aeolian Islands, a volcanic archipelago,
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PROPERTY
the northeast tip of Sicily, in the sparkling
azure waters of the Mediterranean Sea. All
astonishingly beautiful, with an identity all
BUSINESS
of their own, the Aeolian archipelago was OPPORTUNITIES The Lady, on-sale in
designated a UNESCO World Heritage site
in 2000.
PRIVATE INVESTOR wanted for a all good Supermarkets
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every Friday, just 2.50
Email: gwenbartstra@gmail.com
Tel: 07704 136539 Tel. 07511 807529
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PERSONALS
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WANTED. Lady who would enjoy GENTLEMAN FOR HIRE
occasional, discreet, NSA daytime professional male companion and
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SPAIN aged 59 who is a tall, dark, elegant assured.
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club, golf. Nearby shops, restaurants,
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BOX NUMBERS
www.apartmentsestepona.co.uk
Tel. +44 (0)7836 313282.

Attractive villa, large pool, secluded

The Lady is now orchard setting. Near stunning sandy Please send your CV, covering letter and any
beaches/many places of interest. Sleeps 6.
available each and Tel 01234 327615, Mob 0780 360 3505
references
every week on Email philippa_holden@hotmail.com By post to:
www.las-higueras.co.uk Box ............. The Lady issue date.............
VTAR/CA/00781 39-40 Bedford St
LONDON
WC2E 9ER
Or apply online at:

TAKE 5 ISSUES www.jobs.lady.co.uk

(Enter box number into Search box on the page).

OF THE LADY For more information telephone:

The Lady on 020 7379 4717

FOR ONLY 5! u If posting please do not send originals by post clearly stating
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Simply visit lady.subscribeonline.co.uk u Please be aware that we do not forward trade communications
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 CLASSIFIED ADVERTISEMENTS
CLASSIFIED ADVERTISEMENTS

APPOINTMENTS
APPOINTMENTS

EMPLOYMENT
DOMESTIC UKAGENCIES, STAFF & CARE SERVICES DOMESTIC UK
LIVE-IN HOUSEKEEPER CHEF/HOUSEKEEPER LIVE-IN CARER,
EXPERIENCED COMPANION,
HOUSEKEEPER
SITUATIONS VACANT IN THE SITUATIONS VACANT IN THE HOUSEKEEPER,
NANNY REQUIRED EAST
Needed by London based couple (adult
BRITISH ISLES Beautiful country house. Long-term BRITISH ISLES (cooks,
children having left home) who mainly live CAMBRIDGESHIRE
(cooks,housekeepers, position. Good salary and high housekeepers, mothers
in a brand new London help,- also
apartment Central London, family of four,
mothers
30+of help,nannies, au pairs) standard accommodation offered, nannies.
with homesFor similarand
in Cornwall positions
Tobago - where We are seeking
live-out. Duties to someone to care
include general
years g
seecapage 79 for similar posts overseas seeresponsibilities
only cooking page 75 required as for an elderly gentleman who is
01978 752800 Hourly
plus twoCare
daysfrom
off6weekly.
to 24 hours
Excellent housekeeping, laundry, cooking,
rin
there is already housekeeping staff in situ.
available overseas references,
Live-in/Night driver
Duty/Hourly Caredriving
(clean getting
school frail.
run He is still
and able to walk
babysitting.
Separate and comfortable accommodation
Care of the Elderly & Young Adults licence),
Compassionate & Affordablechildren,
no dependent Service PART-TIME, LiveatIn
provided PA/
each Cook/
home. his dog, slowly
Occasional travelbut
willwould need
be required
Live in Companion/Carers Professional,dogQualified,
lover.Kind Care Staff Housekeeper/ Occasional Driver someone to help with
and knowledge this exercise.
of computer/
Passion for cooking essential - previous
FULL-TIME
Long HOUSEKEEPER
Term, Short Term & Respite Registered with CQC & UKHCA - Hampshire.
experience in a Unusual,
private home interesting
is not. As light Your for
internet rolelight
would
adminbe all-
work.
Established in 1984 Duties: general daily housekeeping, position for aduties
housekeeping Company Chairman
will be completed by encompassing so flexibility is
Required to assist in smooth
www.caringcompanionsltd.com Tel: 020
washing and7482
ironing,2188
ongoing and his teenage daughter atideal
noon- afternoons free. Perhaps theirfor essential
We arefor driving,
offering a cooking
long term and
someone studying/mature student; would
running of Hampshire country
enquiries@caringcompanionsltd.com www.pillarcare.co.uk
spring clean planning, shopping, weekend cottageinterested
also suit someone in a beautiful,
in catering ensuring
positionthatto hea can
hardlive life as fully
working,
home for lively family. Highly packing, dog sitting/walking, cover riverside Hampshire location. Work
career. Car provided. as possible.
trustworthy, His personal
cheerful and care is
organised with relevant experience. holidays etc, occasional light lunch mainly at weekends so could be
Good salary offered- subject to experience. likely to increase
flexible personin duevery
with course.
highHe
Cleaning, laundry, some cooking, preparation, infrequent catering for combined with full time work has an active
standards, social life andskills
organisational is family
and
Please send
elsewhere. your application/CV
Separate one bedroom to:
filing, security. Separate friends/family. Sky TV, all amenities, lives close
cleanliness. by and
Good are very
English, a clean
accommodation. Must drive, no use of car.
emma@9dukeofyork.com
flat, rent and services free, plus supportive.
driving Accommodation:
licence, excellent references your
Who will
pets or dependent children. pamper your pets, secure your home, baffle
To start salary. Other staff employed. own and annex withthree
at least separate
yearsentrance.
work
end of May. the burglars and reduce your insurance premium?
Start early July 2011. Successful
EXPERIENCED applicant must be
HOUSEKEEPER or Salary: circa 30,000,
experience essential. (AGY.)
multi-talented,
couple for beautiful a good, modern
country house
Apply Box 14597 Please apply giving your personal cook and flexible.
in Rutland. Please
Long term. Allsend CV
duties, Contact
Please Boxyour
email 26223
CV
details and past employment and
salary references to
plus s/c accommodation. Box 26225 and photograph to
history,
To book, or for a brochure copy
call 01296 630references
730 BEAUTIFUL
N/S, no dependents FIVE bedroomed
or pets. nikitee@hotmail.com
or visit www.homesitters.co.uk cottage, free to a couple. Located in MAID / HOUSEKEEPING Attendant
LIVE OUT HOUSEKEEPER/PA. and contact telephone number to: Email: cliffordestates@email.com or call 07770 266 979
Somerset. - Cotswolds. To work under
Own economical car required for joargent@btinternet.com Tel. 07864Must 949400 be cat lovers as we
We are actively recruiting homesitters
local runs. Mileage allowance paid.
nationwide
or 01342 825915 have 4 resident black cats who direction of principal and nanny.
need looking after in the cottage. Duties to include cleaning, washing,
4 days, Monday - BUSY FAMILY in London W2 is
50 hours gardening/housekeeping ironing, kitchen preparation,
Thursday. Canterbury, Kent. N/S. EXPERIENCED LIVE-IN looking for an experienced
forHOUSEKEEPER
Free accommodation. washup etc. Some assistance with
Must be child & pet friendly. Email: REQUIRED housekeeper for all laundry and
LIVE-IN CARER for gentleman in childcare and babysitting required.
deborah@hebely-bubbly.co.uk Contact LONDON N6 Box 26226 wardrobe maintenance. Duties
Canterbury, Kent area. Must have 45 hr week with 2 full consecutive
LIVE IN CARER/COMPANION for EXPERIENCED COUPLE required comprise of washing, folding, ironing,
experience of Parkinsons disease days off although some weekend
woman of 64 with alzheimers. for permanent role in Hampshire. Full
New, self-contained organising wardrobe, taking fine
and dementia. Accommodation work may be required. Furnished
Beautiful setting with own quarters time live in role at 8 bedroom
accommodation provided. delicates to the dry cleaner and shoe
provided - bedroom with lounge self contained accommodation
in Cambridgeshire. N/S. Driving cottage in Hampshire.
5 /2 days / week weekend and
1 Fantastic polishing. Mending/sewing would be
area/TV, ensuite bathroom. provided. Must be hardworking and
Has
essential. Tel. the657928
07980 Butler run off Delightful surroundings. Kitchen
long-term
eveningopportunity
work, 4 weeks for annual a plus. 10-12 hours/week. Attention to
speak English to a good standard.
LOVELY CARING Responsible lady experienced, positive holiday.couple. Great detail is essential and good
with
as live-in carer the Housekeeper?
to fragile elderly
area shared. Own transport
accommodation in separate Please send CV and covering letter
references required. Please email:
necessary. Wages negotiable. to Box 26232
lady, Hove. N/S. Car owner. Small 2-bedroom carriage house.
Childcare duties to 4 children aged 15 clevelandsquare@gmail.com or
Apply Box 14603
amount good Are youcooking
home left and CLEANER/HOUSEKEEPER
Housekeeper
between 11yrs duties
and to include
7yrs. all
Childcare
HOUSEKEEPING HELP -
call Sandra on 0786 797 5062
cleaning,experience
laundry, cooking, managing Northants. Required to work
without a Driver? Wiltshire. Long term, full-time,
usual laundry. essential. LIVE-IN CARER required for elderly
alongside existing team in large
Apply Box 14594 & ordering home supplies,
Housekeeping duties, cooking, organising lady. Driving and basic English
required immediately. Live-in, country house, open to the public.
A SELF CONTAINED STUDIO FLAT household inventory,
cleaning, laundry, occasional
ironing cooking essential. Shropshire.
Has the
in very desirable SW London
Nanny separate 1 bedroomed cottage. Car
child
Full caring. Handyperson/gardener
clean driving licence essential.
Usual housekeeping duties. Some
Tel. 07944 775313
owner, dog lover and references weekends/evenings. Must drive, be
moved
location, offered renton?free for essential. Tel. 01380 840214.
duties include
Must managing
be flexible, grounds,
organised, CARER/COMPANION required to
a non- smoker & dog lover. No
absolutely flexible, reliable support general property maintenance,
trustworthy and experienced with assist with housekeeping duties and
Email: johns.conock@tiscali.co.uk dependants. Live in/out. Full time.
for professional couple, including vegetable
high garden,
standards. small building
References essential. a senior Lady with early stage of
HANTS/WILTS BORDER. Immediate start.
overseeing main house during projects, driving, care of pool and dementia and son with a learning
Attractive one bedroomed cottage Contact Box 26227
owners absence, and light home, tennis
To apply,court, security,
please send errands.
your CV and difficulty. Bloxham, Oxfordshire.
for couple/person. One partner to
office/garden help by arrangment.
Suits professional or early
RECRUITS
provide P/T gardening/caretaker
Knowledge of caring
reference details to
must.jen.howden@ocado.com
for
Both need full UK driving
animals a No personal care required
be prepared to be compassionate
but must
occasional dog sitting. Regret no
retirement person
There ofis
independent
only one solution licence. 5 days per week including andwww.lady.co.uk
loving. Second son is around
pets.to anyreferences
Good domesticessential.
means having strong weekends. Please contact Box 26231 most of the time. Driver preferred.
staffing issue. Call The Lady Recruits
Suit mature today for
couple.
communication skills, trustworthy, OCCASIONAL COOK needed for Must be prepared to work 20 days
the ultimate support Email:
and dandsgruzelier@gmail.com
guidance on
discreet, driver and animal lover. family in Ockham, Surrey. Able to and have 8 days off but can be
LIVE-IN NANNY/AU PAIR required
Checkable referencesfindingessential.a new replacement.
in Merseyside, from August. Email: cook dinner parties,HEAD suppers HOUSEKEEPER,
and HAMPSHIRE
flexible around this. References
Apply Box 14598 lunches. Required on weekends, essential. Competitive
ishbelwhitehead@doctors.org.uk
Let our team of experienced recruiters take the Our client
rarely midweek.requires
Send a responsible
CV, photos and & capable live-in Head
remuneration. Housekeeper
Please email CV to:to
worry off your hands and find the right person for references - RSVP manage their large new build home in Hampshire. or call
bblakey@btinternet.com
your requirements.
COUPLE REQUIRED The successful candidate will take care
houstonfelica@mac.com of all962
07979 housekeeping
268 duties and
FOR A MANOR HOUSE AND GROUNDS IN GLOUCESTERSHIRE attend to the family when they visit at weekends and day off will be taken
during the week. It is important to the family that the house be cared for in
Responsible for overseeing client care, housekeeping and maintenance of their absence.LIVE IN The lady of the house
HOUSEKEEPER tends to do
REQUIRED, her own cooking so this is
STAFFORDSHIRE.
complex technical systems to the highest standard. The successful not a requirement of the role.
Forprovide
candidates will morean information
enthusiastic and please
flexible call
approach to the This is a fantastic
Would suit earlyrole for acouple,
retired self-starter who
duties wishes
include to work
general autonomously.
housekeeping,
020-7379
position 4717 and
and be discreet at allask forFirst
times. The Lady
class Recruits
references essential. You will need to
cooking, self-motivate
laundry, when
cleaning, the family
household are not in residence
maintenance, day to dayand the
principals must
management, andfeel they canMust
gardening. rely love
upondogs,
you to carry
have out your
previous duties
experience
or email theladyrecruits@lady.co.uk
Excellent accommodation available on site together with a good package effectively
and haveatinitiative.
all times.LovelyDiscretion and a positive
accommodation attitudemust
provided, to thedrive,
service
no of
for the successful candidates. the principals arechildren,of utmost importanceand
non-smokers too.references.
25,000 - 30,000 (AGY).

Apply Box 14621 Contact

Please BoxBox
apply 26229
14611

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13/03/2017 15:44
18:43
 CLASSIFIED ADVERTISEMENTS
EMPLOYMENT AGENCIES, STAFF & CARE SERVICES
HOUSE MANAGEMENT COUPLE

An experienced live-in house management couple are required for a large

family home south of Worcester. Our clients, a professional working couple
with a thirteen year old daughter, require an accomplished couple to run TAKE 5
their home. This is an all and everything role that can be split in any way
necessary, the duties will include but are not limited to: gardening,
Your Mum is my Mum
Professional, Reliable and Friendly
ISSUES OF
maintenance, car management, school run (20 minutes from home), all
housekeeping and shopping for household supplies, and some light
service, enabling you
to remain in your own home.
THE LADY
cooking for the family only. Both members of the couple must drive. Live-in Care, Convalescence,
Respite, Companionship.
FOR ONLY 5!
Our clients are looking for a couple to join them long term and have an Experienced Carerscontact
For more information Required.
us on Simply visit
excellent track record of longevity with their previous staff. This is a Tel 01684 293366
Monday to Friday live-in role with accommodation provided as a separate lady.subscribeonline.co.uk
Email info@vanguardcare.co.uk
self-contained one bedroom flat with its own garden above the garage www.vanguardcare.co.uk and input offer code FIL17
adjacent to the main house. 45,000 (AGY).
95% British Carers
Contact Box 26230

CALLING ALL HOUSEKEEPERS!!

Live out Housekeeper role in central
London. Candidates must have
EXPERIENCED HOUSEKEEPER &
HANDYPERSON REQUIRED,
The lady is now available
previous private household
experience in large, luxury homes.
LOUGHTON, ESSEX AREA each and every week on
Duties include vacuuming, dusting, We are a young lively family
mopping floors, care of fine consisting of 3 children (2 girls and 1
furnishings, laundry management boy), a busy husband and a stay at
(including delicate items), wardrobe home wife, who needs help in the
management, bed linen changes, home. We require an experienced
implementing and managing a housekeeper and handyperson to
cleaning rota, overseeing deliveries, help manage the home and estate CARER JOB VACANCIES DOMESTIC OVERSEAS
running errands and packing for the and help with the children, running
clients regular trips away. errands/school runs etc. We will LIVE-IN CARER/Companion COUPLE, ITALY - Our clients are
Applicants must have excellent provide you with your own car and Opportunity, Hexham, looking for an experienced Couple
English and be used to working in beautiful cottage in the grounds of Northumberland. My wife Ann, who required to look after their beautiful
semi- formal households. Salary the estate. We are looking for an has mild Parkinsons, needs looking rural villa and extensive gardens. The
dependent on experience. (Agy) efficient, kind, honest, flexible and after progressively, but retains secluded home is used by the
Please contact Box 26235 enthusiastic couple to fill this alertness and a cheerful and easy owners regularly and it is not rented
DOG LOVING HOUSEKEEPER position in our home. going nature. We have other out. The villa is set in extensive
- Village Near Cambridge. Retired educated, sensible, confident and grounds with formal gardens, fields
couple need living in Housekeeper Contact Box 26233 companionable carers who now and woods. This will require a
to help them run beautiful rural require another welcoming person candidate who is happy to spend a
family home (children now only to complete 7 day cover. The lot of time outside looking after the
occasional visitors). Cleaning, HANDYPERSON - Hindhead, location of our comfortable modern land. The ability to drive a tractor,
laundry and walking two dogs. Surrey. We are looking for a friendly, family home which overlooks operate a chainsaw and carry out
Self-contained accommodation capable Part-Time Handyperson for Tynedale, is Hexham, general maintenance on the property
with free heating, high end utilities the Hindhead area "GU26" Surrey. Northumberland's award winning will be part of your skillset. The
etc. Might suit retired couple. Live-out, must love dogs. Please market town. The city of Newcastle Housekeeping role includes polishing
Partner with own employment apply to Box 26234 and the county's coastline are 25 silver, caring for fine sculptures,
welcome. Non-smokers. Working miles away, as is the Scottish fabrics and antiques as well as having
arrangements are flexible within the Border. There are excellent public excellent laundry and ironing skills.
framework of a residential position. www.lady.co.uk transport services and the Pennines Candidates must be happy to be in
Please contact Box 26239 and the Lake District are 30 the countryside and be dog lovers.
minutes and one hour away by car. Accommodation is a separate one
Interview preceded by CV's will bedroom, two storey house, with its
MOTHER'S HELP/HOUSEKEEPER, PART TIME, LIVE-OUT, HAMPSHIRE take place in London or at home own garden and drive; it is very
within six weeks. All employment private. All utilities paid for except
Our client, a busy mother of three (13, 11, 9 years old), is looking for a conditions and negotiable salary telephone. Sole use of a car is also
part-time mother's help to assist her daily. This is a live-out role and the arrangements will apply. Please available. Candidates must have at
hours will be 2pm - 7pm Monday to Friday, with occasional additional hours apply with CV to Box 26238 least three years experience of
required from time to time. The ability to muck in and assist in all duties PART-TIME CARER - part time working as a Couple and being able
relating to the smooth running of this family home is a must. Housekeeping support. Couple with a mature to speak Italian would be an
duties will be done on a daily basis before the children return home from perspective required. Rural advantage. Excellent references
school at which point a simple supper will be prepared and some accommodation, near Chelmsford, required. (AGY.)
assistance with homework will be required. Salary: 10-12 net per hour Essex, offered rent free for reliable Contact Box 26224
(AGY). and flexible support. Some help
needed with personal support for an
active lady in a wheelchair with
THE LADY
Contact Box 26236
spinal injury, assistance around the
house, some garden maintenance
Recruiting for the households
and help with pets. You need your
own transport and be willing to drive of Britain and the world for
DISPLAY RECRUITMENT our car (manual driver over 25 for over 125 years
ADVERTISEMENT MEDIA PACK insurance). Non smokers, no
dependants. Apply with CV to
to download from the web, visit our website at courtyardflat10@gmail.com CHEF WANTED - Position
LIVE-IN CARER, Cotswolds - Kind available in an important Irish
www.lady.co.uk hearted, level headed, qualified country house, Near Dublin
or please contact the following numbers: respite carer to live- in from 22nd excellent cook must be prepared
June until 16th July. Car provided. to work flexible hours.
Telephone: 020 7379 4717 Non-Smoker. Please apply with CV Accommodation provided.
39-40 Bedford Street, London WC2E 9ER and references to Impeccable credentials only.
lucy@bazaarevents.com Please contact Box 26240

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17Mar_Classifieds.indd 75 13/03/2017 18:51

 CLASSIFIED ADVERTISEMENTS
SCHOOLS & COLLEGES SITUATIONS WANTED

Self-Employed Female Carer

High aspirations, traditional values
All-ability co-educational
day and boarding school for
students aged 11 19 years
I am an experienced self-employed female carer, seeking a live-in care job, to look
after your elderly parents perhaps, either just when you need me or on a regular basis, 3
weeks on, 1 week off. I love small dogs but not cats. I am a British citizen, born in the UK,
who also has a Swiss passport and speaks German, Italian and some French as well as
English. I can drive. Non-smoker. Salary can be negotiated. I am particularly interested in
the London and Portsmouth areas.
For further information, contact me at: beverleycarlize@yahoo.com
No agencies please.

MATRON COMPANION/CARER available EXPERIENCED LIVE-IN carer,

part-time/live-in. Single lady 40's,
23,935 pa, plus accommodation Residential, full-time driver/non-smoker, flexible.
Permanent Required for September 2017 Hertfordshire/Bedfordshire. Call
07730 001379 after Midday
Situated in the picturesque village of Holyport, close to Windsor, Maidenhead ARE YOU looking for a kind,
and London, Holyport College is the countrys first state day and boarding compassionate, honest carer to
free school and has Eton College as its sole education sponsor. The College look after an elderly relative. South
opened in purpose-built facilities in September 2014 and has proven to be a England only. Call Louise
popular choice for parents we are one of the most over-subscribed schools 07773 764593
in the area for day places and boarding is full. Opportunities to collaborate PET SITTING CRB checked.
with colleagues from Eton College and the use of some of its facilities will add References. All areas considered.
a unique dimension to your work.
Tel: 07879 773343 Website:
We are looking for a well organised, practical and understanding individual to www.a3houseandpetsitting.co.uk
join the College as a Matron.
The Matron will be responsible for the care and wellbeing of boys and girls within
the Boarding House including the provision of first line medical care. The role of CLAIM YOUR
the Matron is varied, and is jointly responsible with the House Master to ensure
the care, supervision, presentation and discipline of the pupils within the House.
FREE GIFT!
See page 57 for details
For more information, please visit our website to download an application pack:
www.holyportcollege.org.uk
EXPERIENCED CARER,
Should you wish to have an informal discussion, please contact Walter Boyle, our companion, driver, cook. Part-time/
founding Head Master on 01628 640150 or headmaster@holyportcollege.org.uk flexible.
Closing date: 12 noon, Thursday 30 March 2017 Contact Alison 07821 774313
SHARRINGTON: NR HOLT: N.
Holyport College is committed to safeguarding and promoting the welfare of children. All
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staff are required to obtain an enhanced disclosure from the Disclosure and Barring Service.
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www.holyportcollege.org.uk Convenient Blakeney, Cley, Wells,
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Tel. 01263 860308 or Email:
rosemary@kimmins1.wanadoo.co.
uk
cook, driver, DBS. References
available.
Contact Tel. 07405 973024
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requires work for accommodation
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LIVE-IN CARER/COMPANION.
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TO BOX NUMBERS Contact Tel. 07884 295698

EXPERIENCED LADY PA/
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Please send your CV, covering letter and any Tel. 07809 466734
references QUALIFIED CARER, driving,
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By post to: Available ASAP.
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Box ............. The Lady issue date............. EXPERIENCED MALE CARER in
39-40 BEDFORD ST London seeks live out position.
Tel. Steven 07486 448684
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For more information telephone: COMING UP

The Lady on 020 7379 4717 Dont miss your chance to advertise your product or company
alongside our forthcoming special features.
u If posting please do not send originals by post clearly stating
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Property
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17Mar_Classifieds.indd 76 13/03/2017 18:54

 QUIZ SECTION

THE LADY PUZZLE PAGES

THE LADYGRAM compiled by Bert Baker
31 12 123 175
1. Unknown recalled low speed (4)
154 92 98 51 101 135 165 128
2. To be greater than oaf failing to start procedure, say (8)
68 118 62 75 139 42 146 109 90 29
3. Delightful leaders of English nobility shouting repeatedly (10)
162 81 156 21 49
4. Area of open, uncultivated land essential to Apache at hideout (5)
59 159 108 26 170 113 9 178
5. Ha! Our pie produced intense happiness (8)
64 95 173 105 126 130 72
6. Dispatches characters (7)
124 22 34 147 7 151 14 143 99 88 163 46 79
7. Halted, had gins again for tonal variation (5,3,5)
76 167 125 116 140
8. Defend owners concealing fund (5)
39 137 117
9. Tender cry broadcast (3)
33 71 6 66 18 142 169 132 43 56 28 38
10. Hurry, men ryes spoilt childrens song (7,5)
40 138 91
11. Not even peculiar (3)
177 73 70 161 106 61 80
12. Hot drink with revolutionary kings instructor (7)
129 93 15 58 86 47 145 30 53 133
13. Men losing opener, so I am harbouring small passion (10)
54 44 122 176
14. Harmless securities analyst forgoes excellent starters (4)
20 179 16 114 57 153 174 141 120
15. Period following old boys infatuation (9)
45 158 60 2 100 78 35 149 115 82
16. Charges after former Prime Minister, towards the Arctic (10)
89 150 11 37 32 157 166 83 103 48
17. Wild opium, sahib. Its able to move on land and water (10)
134 55 27 102 41 172 5 69 94
18. Lost vessel, arranged his quiet ruin (9)
4 131 36 181 67 65 1 155 23 17 107 74 160
19. Actress, teetotal after total freedom, losing right (4,9)
119 84 110 136 152 52 77
20. Knowing manner in Tube station (7)
10 85 144
21. Came first, left immediately (3)
127 50 96 3 19 25 13 164 87
22. Asking forcefully. Its difficult (9)
63 148 97 171 111 8 104 24 121
23. Group beginning to go posh before gallery director cut off (9)
180 112 168
24. Carry loot under guard at first (3) A

The LADYGRAM is solved by NOTES

placing the answers to the
clues in Box A. Each letter
of an answer in Box A is
readily transferred into the
corresponding numbered
space in Box B, which, as
you progress, will become
identifiable as a quotation.
The initial letters of the
answers in Box A will spell
out the name of the author,
plus the book from which
the quotation was taken.

SOLUTION
NEXT WEEK

92 THE LADY 7 AUGUST 2015 17 MARCH 2017 THE LADY 77

QuizPages Mar17 v1.indd 77 13/03/2017 14:56

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SPOT THE DIFFERENCE

There are five dierences between the two images below see if you can spot them SOLUTION NEXT WEEK

78 THE LADY 17 MARCH 2017

QuizPages Mar17 v1.indd 78 13/03/2017 14:56

 QUIZ SECTION

YOUR NOTES

Space for your workings and doodles, with compliments from

R E C RU I T I NG S I NC E 1 8 8 5
RECRUITS
DELIVERING THE BEST IN DOMESTIC RECRUITMENT
020-7379 4717 or email theladyrecruits@lady.co.uk

BRIDGE SOLUTION FROM PAGE 80 SPOT THE DIFFERENCE SOLUTION 10/03/2017

LAST WEEKS DIFFERENCES ARE SHOWN CIRCLED BELOW

Hold up the A until the third round, discarding a spade from
dummy, and play the Q from your hand. If a defender wins
with the K, you will have nine tricks, assuming, as seems likely 1
from the 2 lead, that hearts are 4-4. If the Q is allowed to
win, play a spade to the king and lead the J for a finesse.

CRYPTIC CROSSWORD SOLUTION 10/03/17 (1563)

ACROSS
1 Steel 5 Stars 8 Attacking
9 These 10 Shoes 12 Ideas
13 Enables 15 Shaping
17 Artists 19 Stately 21 Stays
22 Sacks 25 Ounce 26 Identical
27 Sends 28 Hears
2
3
DOWN
1 Seats 2 Erase 3 Raisins
4 Degrees 5 Spots
6 Advertise 7 Saves 11 Sales
14 Afternoon 16 Amass
18 Spanish 19 Suspend
20 Goats 21 Seals 23 Alive
24 Soles
4

5
QUICK CROSSWORD SOLUTION FROM PAGE 81

ACROSS DOWN
1 Harvest 5 Home 8 Meal 2 Ahead 3 Value 4 Songs
9 Nerve 11 Rim 12 Dresses 6 Overcome 7 Enemies
THE LADY ARCHIVE

16 Those 17 Crisp 18 Paddles 10 Rested 13 Reindeer

22 And 23 Error 24 Beat 14 Supper 15 Scratch DIFFERENCES:
25 Hero 26 Cycling 19 Dirty 20 Label 21 Spain 1 Double rim on column 2 Extra pearl on necklace
3 Curl of hair missing 4 Extra pattern on coat
5 Shorter ribbon on dress

17 MARCH 2017 THE LADY 79

QuizPages Mar17 v1.indd 79 13/03/2017 14:56

.
CRYPTIC CROSSWORD No. 1564 compiled by Eddie Waltham
ACROSS
1 Giving up and begrudging it
after pushy start (10)
6 Ten hundred dropping sand
for you, in an old way (4)
10 Unstable mountain range (5)
11 Thoroughly beaten and
lashed (7)
12 Mathematical word for
cracking millet up (8)
13 No-hoper. Somewhat irresolute
type on reflection (5)
15 Try to achieve some great
tempting possibilities (7)
17 Surprisingly early, e.g., and
in a keen way (7)
19 Sort out AGA and Rayburn,
initially with large cooker (7)
21 Sack crew. They can go
to blazes! (7)
22 Luggage holders are items
of torture! (5)
24 Firm floater required in
financial shortage (8)
27 Table item with gold added
for the high table (7)
28 Not all bridges hide this
hill-top line (5)
29 Ego of some serious elfin
types (4)
30 One fruit used in crazy,
starry brew (10)
PROFITABLE
SACRIFICE
Poland gained a swing on the deal
below from a semi-final against the
Netherlands in the 2016 World Open
Teams Championship.
Dealer North. North-South vulnerable
K Q 10 8
Q J 10 6
Q 10 8 5
8
53 N AJ96
3 742
K9762 W E
AK972 S J654
742
AK985
AJ
Q 10 3
SOUTH WEST NORTH
Pass
1NT 2NT Dbl
Pass Pass 3 Pass
3 Pass 4 All Pass
80 THE LADY 17 MARCH 2017
QuizPages Mar17 v1.indd 80
DOWN
1 Left Dover, perhaps (4)
2 Meet and turn on EEC
characters! (9)
3 Each good young person
tries principally to get to
the country (5)
4 US president and French
music maker (7)
5 Currently present but not in
any place (7)
7 Wishes to move shop around
European capital (5)
8 Beneath telling fibs, its said,
is fundamental (10)
9 Evil lager lout? Not entirely,
this country type! (8)
14 A spar graph design with
pieces of writing (10)
16 I go into a grand church with
an ordained person (8)
18 A reminder, possibly, for the
balance due (9) NOTES
NOTES
20 Use up a car component,
or tire? (7)
21 Recipe with flour Ma used (7)
23 Go on all fours using a
swimming stroke (5)
25 Use a brush harshly to
delete something (5)
26 Extremely light signal of
distress (4) SOLUTION NEXT WEEK
SOLUTION NEXT WEEK
BRIDGE by Gus Calderwood
Opening lead: A
With Jacek Kalita and Michal Nowosadzki
ace when declarer plays the king from
dummy. To succeed declarer must then
sitting South and North respectively for draw precisely one round of trumps and
Poland, the bidding went as shown. play a spade, and this line of play is clearly
South opened 1NT in third seat, indicating indicated in view of Wests overcall.
a balanced hand with 15-17 points, and At the other table South opened One
West overcalled 2NT, showing a two-suiter Heart, West overcalled 2NT, showing the
with at least five cards in each minor. North minors, and North jumped to Four Clubs,
doubled with his good hand and East bid indicating a raise to Four Hearts with a
Three Clubs. This was passed round to North, singleton or void in clubs. East now bid Five
who was forced to game with an artificial bid Clubs and South doubled. South led the king
of Three Diamonds. When South bid Three of hearts and switched to the ace and another
Hearts, North raised to Four Hearts. diamond. Declarer could not avoid losing a
West led the ace of clubs, East following trump trick and a spade trick, so the contract
with the six as a suit preference signal for went two down and Poland gained
spades, and switched to a trump. Kalita won eight imps on the board.
43 with the king, ruffed a club in dummy, played
a diamond to the ace, ruffed another club, THIS WEEKS PROBLEM
and played a heart to the ace. He drew the WEST EAST
outstanding trump, discarding a spade from AQ53 K72
dummy, and played the jack of diamonds A93 10 5
from his hand. West won with the king and AQ83 J 10 4
played a club. Kalita discarded another spade AQ J 10 9 5 3
EAST from dummy and ruffed in his hand. He played
Pass a spade to the king, losing to Easts ace, and West plays in 3NT and North leads the 2.
3 claimed the rest of the tricks to make his game. Plan the play.
The best defence is for West to switch to
a spade at trick two and East to withhold his SOLUTION ON PAGE 79
13/03/2017 14:57
 QUIZ SECTION

QUICK CROSSWORD No. 966 by Weald THE LADYGRAM SOLUTION 10/03/17

S H E W A S R E A L L Y W O
N D E R I N G H O W S H E W
A S G O I N G T O K E E P T
H I S S T R A N G E Y O U N
G M A N I N H A R M O N Y W
I T H T H E R E S T S H E O
B S E R V E D T H A T H E W
A S C O M P R E S S I N G H
I S T E A C U P S O T H A T
T H E R E W A S D A N G E R
L E S T T H E T H I N C H I
ACROSS N A M I G H T P O S S I B L
1 Bring in the crops (7) Y F O L D I N W A R D S
5 Habitat (4) 1. V ILLAGE IDIOT 14. N EST OF TABLES
8 Repast (4) 2. I SOLATION WARD 15. I SSUES FORTH
9 Cheek! (5) 3. R EADING ROOM 16. G OSSIPING SHOP
11 Edge of a wheel (3) 4. G OALKEEPER 17. H AM HOCK
12 Puts on clothes (7) 5. I NTEREST RATE 18. T HATCHED HOUSE
16 Converse of these (5) DOWN 15 Minor graze (7) 6. N OWHERE ELSE 19. A TTACH CASE
17 Crunchy (5) 2 Forwards (5) 19 Unclean (5) 7. I NSTRUCTOR 20. N EW HEIGHTS
18 Propels a canoe (7) 3 Worth (5) 20 Tag showing price, 8. A NGRY YOUNG 21. D ISHWASHER
22 Plus, also (3) 4 Vocal tunes (5) e.g. (5) MAN 22. D ISH THE DIRT
23 Mistake (5) 6 Defeat (8) 21 Iberian country (5) 9. W ISHING WELL 23. A S YOU LIKE IT
24 Rhythm, 7 Foes (7) 10. O BSERVATORY 24. Y OUTH HOSTEL
cadence (4) 10 Took a break (6) 11. O RGANISE
25 Brave man (4) 13 Santas beasts? (8) 12. L AWN MOWERS VIRGINIA WOOLF
26 Riding a bike (7) 14 Late evening meal (6) SOLUTION ON PAGE 79 13. F LOWER POTS Night and Day

NOTES

SUDOKU
ANSWERS: BOOKS
NO 586 EASY AND THEATRE
Fill the grid with the numbers 1 to 9
PAGE 60 Murphy by
so that each row, column and 3x3 block Samuel Beckett
contains the numbers 1 to 9
PAGE 61 Busmans
SOLUTION NEXT WEEK
Honeymoon by Dorothy
L Sayers (below)
SUDOKU SOLUTION 10/3/17 (585)
PAGE 65 Art by Yasmina Reza
PHOTOGRAPHY
THE LADY ARCHIVE
CREDIT

17 MARCH 2017 THE LADY 81

QuizPages Mar17 v1.indd 81 13/03/2017 14:57

 INTERVIEW
Im comfortable with
the way I am
FIRST IMPRESSIONS
DEBORAH
MEADEN
is a businesswoman best known for appearing
on the BBC2 programme Dragons Den. She was
on BBC1s Strictly Come Dancing in 2013 and in
2009 published a book, Common Sense Rules.
She works with charities including Dogs Trust
and is an ambassador for the World Wide Fund for
Nature. She lives in Somerset with her husband.
What are you working on at the moment? I am
supporting WWFs Earth Hour, the worlds
biggest event to raise awareness of climate
change. It isnt just impacting the ice caps or
the African savannah; its affecting all our lives.
The time for action is now.
When were you at your happiest? Backpacking in
India with my now husband, when I saw my first
cheetah in the wild. Yesterday out riding with my
sister. This morning waking up surrounded by
my animals. Happiness happens when you
have the time to notice and appreciate it.
What is your greatest fear? Allowing fear to
stop me from doing the things I want to do
and living the way I want to live.
What is your earliest memory? Playing on the
beach with my older sister in Brightlingsea. It
didnt go well and I dislike beaches to this day.
What do you dislike about yourself? I rub
along well with myself. Although Im not everyones
cup of tea, Im comfortable with the way I am.
Who has been your greatest influence? I could list
hundreds of ordinary people who have handled
something extraordinarily well or simply have
some clarity of vision.
What is your most treasured possession? My
freedom, independence and privacy are dearer to
me than anything I own, but Id have to say the
ring my husband bought me.
What trait do you most deplore in others?
Unkindness, lack of compassion, cruelty all the
same thing really, and all lead to hurt and pain.
What do you most dislike about your
appearance? My face is a record of my 58 years
of love, laughter, sadness and joy, and my body
has allowed me to do pretty much all that
I have wanted so far, so whats to dislike?
What is your favourite book? Black Beauty.
I still cant get through it without getting
really upset, particularly now I have so
many rescue horses.
82 THE LADY 17 MARCH 2017
First Impressions Mar17 v2.indd 82
Your favourite film? The Shawshank Redemption.
Tomorrow I am going dancing, so it will probably
be Moulin Rouge.
Your favourite piece of music? The Bottle by
Gil Scott-Heron.
Your favourite meal? My husband cooks the most
amazing beef marinated in ginger, chilli and all
sorts of spices, followed by a palate-cleansing
champagne sorbet with the bubbles captured in it.
Who would you most like to come to dinner?
Sir David Attenborough, no hesitation. He has
seen, actually driven, the change in the way
we view our natural world.
What is the nastiest thing anyone has ever
said to you? No idea. People have said things
that I dont like but they have come from the
right place. Nasty comes from the wrong
place, so has no validity in my book, and so
I dont hold on to it.
Deborahs
Do you believe in aliens? It is highly unlikely
delights: Black
that ours is the only planet able to sustain life,
Beauty, Sir David
so absolutely I believe in aliens.
Attenborough,
What is your secret vice? I am a midnight pickled
The Bottle by Gil
gherkin eater.
Scott-Heron and
her husbands Do you write thank-you notes? Yes, almost always
beef with ginger on carefully chosen note cards.
and chilli
Which phrase do you most overuse? Quite
frankly, which usually means Brace yourself .
What single thing would improve the quality
of your life? A teletransporter so I didnt have to
waste time on journeys.
Tell us something people might not know about
you. When I was seven I was the youngest person
to win a scholarship at Trinity College of Music
on the piano.
What would you like your epitaph to say?
She did.
u Take part in WWFs Earth Hour to call for
iSTOCK
action on climate change, Saturday 25 March,
8.30-9.30pm. wwf.org.uk/earthhour
13/03/2017 13:48
 R E C RU I T I N G S I N C E 1 8 8 5

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Untitled-10 83 13/03/2017 16:18

 AGELESS
STYLE

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Buy onlinewww.rewclothing.co.uk
or call 01827 58006

Untitled-4 84 10/03/2017 12:57