Running Head: MY REFLECTION ON WHITE PRIVILEGE

My Reflection on White Privilege

Miriam Meza
Northern Illinois University
October 9, 2015
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While reading Nolan Cabrera, Robin DiAngelo, and Janet E. Helms readings around

White people and their role with racism, I could not help but think of the ongoing development I

have with one of my students. It all started in August during a retreat and has been an ongoing

conversation since. His behavior and development reflect Helms model of White racial identity

development. Through his responses and actions, he has demonstrated the various stages in

Helms model.

It began in August when the organization I co-advice went on a retreat. The organization

consists of 13 members, six who identify as White and seven who identify as Black. Out of the

13 members, four hold executive roles, two who identify as White and two who identify as

Black. When planning this retreat, I was given some context information about the organization,

since I was new to the NIU community. I was told the organization had to work on their

understanding of issues around diversity and social justice, specifically race. I decided to do a

low-risk activity and planned for students to complete the activity Circles of My Multicultural

Self.

Students were divided into two groups so that my supervisor and I could facilitate the

conversations and students were intentionally placed in certain groups. Students established the

rules of having a safe space and being respectful of one anothers opinions whether one agreed

with them or not. The group I was facilitating had one of the executive members who identifies

as a straight White male. After completing the activity, I opened up space for sharing what they

had written and respond to the questions as comfortable as they felt. This particular student

answered the prompt, I am __ but am not __. He responded, I am White but am not

privileged. He then proceeded to explain his response by saying that although he was White, it

did not mean he was rich and lived in a mansion. We continued with the activity and I later
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followed up with him. I asked him why he thought he was not privileged and he answered by

saying that he did not like that people automatically assumed that because he was White he came

from a rich family, he had a lot of money, or that he was wealthy. I later explained why he held

privilege for being a male, straight, and White regardless of his social economic status. He has

since then willingly engaged in conversations around race with me at various times.

This students development is reflective of Helms model. At the beginning of this

students development, he was nave about his privilege and considered himself to be just like

everyone else. As Helms (2007) suggested, Contact is characterized by an innocence and

ignorance about race and racial issues. The person is not consciously White and assumes that

other people are raceless, too, with the exception of minor differences in coloration (p. 24). In

this students development, I witnessed the way that he innocently saw that he was just like

everyone in the room and he noticed a difference visually, but thought that he shared everyday

issues with everyone else.

I then saw the second stage, disintegration, play out with this students development.

After I pulled him aside to unfold what he had said, he was confused about how being White

gave him benefits if, as he stated before, he was not of a higher economic status. I proceeded to

tell him an example of how I had walked into a Walgreens and was followed around to make sure

I was not shoplifting while there was a White teenager walking in another aisle actually shop

lifting, but the teenager was not getting followed because of White privilege. As Helms (2007)

stated, Recognition of these benefits carries with it a recognition of the negative consequences

of their potential loss, and awareness that maintaining uncontested membership in the White

group requires one to treat other racial groups immorally (p. 30). Providing him with this

example made him realize that his advisor, whom he viewed as someone who was respectable,
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was being treated immorally. He acknowledged that a White person had behaved that way, but

was torn on why and how he should respond to it.

Throughout our various conversations there have been moments where he enters

reintegration stage as he blames people of color of being in the situation that they are in. Helms

(2007) stated, The primary self-protective strategy during this stage is displacement or

scapegoating that is, resolving ones inner turmoil by blaming people of color by ones condition

rather than Whites (p. 31). In a conversation him and I were having, post a group discussion, I

asked him how he felt about the group agreeing that a Black student leader had gotten pulled

over for being Black, he disapproved. He continued to justify the police officer and said that the

student leader, his peer, must have gotten pulled over for doing something wrong. I then

conversed with him about the stereotypes of assuming that a young Black male did something

wrong and the current issues with law enforcement.

Lastly, I see DiAngelos White Fragility theory play a slight role in this students

behavior through the way he displays pseudo-independence characteristics. This student lives in

a predominantly White fraternity and is never forced to think about race. As DiAngelo (2011)

wrote, We see race as operating when people of color are present, but all-white spaces as pure

spacesuntainted by race vis a vis the absence of the carriers of race (and thereby the racial

polluters)people of color (p. 62). He not only is rarely forced to think about race, but he is

enforced to remain in the White environment he is in because of comfort. Helms (2007) stated,

The person is likely to receive positive reinforcement from other Whites who are seeking new

ways to be White as well as people of color who likely think this kind of White is better than

most of the others they have encountered (p. 32). I feel that DiAngelos White Fragility theory

plays a role in which this student is not forced to interact with people of color unless he is with
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the organization where segregation is very obvious. Without that forced interaction he is just

being empowered by his White peers.

The theory has informed me about ways in which White students may react depending in

which stage he/she/ze is in and one can educate them. It is important to be mindful of what stage

the student is at and to what level the stage is at so that discussions can be more proactive. With

this particular student, I try to take it upon myself to check up on him after conversations around

race and discuss his thoughts. It is very clear that he is curious about learning about race, but

just falls back in and out of stages. I find it very important to be available to have discussions

around race whether it is in a formal workshop or in conversations to further educate everyone.

In this case, my goal is to educate at least one White student in hopes the education spreads.
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References

DiAngelo, R. (2011). White Fragility. International Journal of Critical Pedagogy,3.

Helms, J. E. (2008). A race is a nice thing to have: A guide to being a White person or

understanding the White persons in your life (2nd ed.).