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Denmark program, it is hard not to adopt the motto that culture determines
normal. This extends into how Danes approach childhood because their main goal
(just like most Americans) is to make sure that children assimilate into the culture
as easily as possible once they are older. Danish culture, however is much different
Exploring Danish culture and childhood in terms of family, society, relationships and
Danish childhood starts in the family as parents are the leading agents in the
child rearing process. To begin with, parents in Denmark tend to value different
things in terms of how they go about interacting with their children than parents in
America. Both American and Danish parents want their children to end up being
independent and competent when they are ready to go out in the real world on their
own. However, while Americans value that independence, they tend to restrict their
childrens actions in childhood. Danes on the other hand value autonomy even at a
young age which definitely flies in the face of certain rearing practices that
Americans might be used to. Danes want their children to experience risk because
they feel that it is a learning experience and this is evident in the lack of helicopter
parenting in Danish culture as well as the types of schools that they tend to send
their children to (which will be further explained later on). This willingness to allow
their children to experience risk is also a result of an increased amount of trust that
parents have in their children and also in the other people in Danish society. This
trust is in stark contrast with American values because we tend to watch over our
childrens every move and we definitely do not trust other people when it comes to
our children.
Danish moms and American moms. Boyatzis studied the differences in parenting
been that while American moms focus on a concerted cultivation style of raising
their children, Danes treat their children as competent active agents in their own
development (Boyatzis, 6/8/16). What this means is that American parents feel
that it is necessary to be active themselves in planning how their children learn and
what their children learn. This process involves a lot of effort and thus, creates a lot
of worry in the parents about the outcome of their child based on what they are
doing to help them. Danes on the other hand dont tend to treat children much
differently than they would another competent adult. They believe that children will
(Boyatzis, 6/8/16). In the end of the study, Danes tended to be more okay with
risk and a hazard), they encouraged more autonomy in their children, and they
also tended to discipline their children less than their American counterparts.
One thing that perfectly exemplifies Danish parents relative comfort with risk
are the types of play structures that children have access to on playgrounds,
especially this one red climbing structure at Egoskov Castle. The playground at
Egoskov castle is known for its size and various play structures. The biggest
attraction is a very tall red structure made out of ropes that allows children to climb
however high they feel comfortable with. The very top is as tall as some trees and
kids would climb all the way up there while their parents sat on the side and chatted
amongst themselves, not even paying their children much attention. This structure
that they wouldnt sue if something were to happen to their children while playing
on the structure. Neither would American parents simply it calmly by the side of the
playground and only glance at their children occasionally. They would be standing
right by the side of the structure constantly looking at their children and telling
US parents often worry about what may happen (a what-if culture), whereas Danes
view this play as educational and think that their children can learn about
only shared by Danes either, but it does fly in the face of many American cultural
values. An article entitled, Why Are Little Kids in Japan So Independent? outlines
exactly that point and further substantiates the fact that culture is what regulates
what is normal. Little kids in Japan, as young as age 9, are allowed to ride the
subway and run errands by themselves and parents trust both their children and the
people that they may see on their way. Danes do the same thing, as many times
you will see younger children riding trains and buses by themselves without
parents. The sense of trust that parents have in their children as well as the people
they encounter is something utterly absent in American culture. It teaches the kids
in Japan and Denmark how to be independent as well as how to navigate without
the help of a parental figure. These children may be learning much more valuable
skills than the kids in America who are constantly sheltered and looked over by their
parents. In America, kids taking the train by themselves at the age of 9 would be
gawked at and people might even think that they have bad parents, but this is
relationships and getting married on the same level of importance as Americans do.
Marianne stated that it is definitely her expectation to marry someone and have
children down the line, however finding someone to actually marry is less important
than having a partner. Scott McClure, a former Bucknellian, told the Bucknell in
Denmark group that it was his American side that caused him to propose to his
child out of wedlock and that it wasnt abnormal to be a single parent (6/8/16). In
America, it is often frowned upon to have not found a significant other to marry at
some point in ones life. Therefore, this is another cultural normality in Denmark
that children must be prepared for due to the fact that it isnt truly necessary to find
and not tied down by the bonds of marriage that are so prevalent in the US.
Denmark and it is definitely much different from what most Americans are used to
as well. Most Danes send their children to preschool programs starting as early as
education that many Americans are used to. Instead, it is structured around free
play and parents choose from various types of places to send their children. All
child care places in Denmark embrace the philosophy of en god barndom or the
good childhood. It is important to Danes that their children all get to experience
this good childhood and thus their childhood education system is structured very
uniquely. They have a choice to send their children to a Bornehavn (the most
Both types off preschools focus on free play and allowing kids to be active in their
own learning process, however the forest and nature schools tend to allow the
Bornehavns are fairly normal in that parents drop their kids off early in the
morning and the kids go to their designated classrooms and put their stuff in their
cubbies. Thats where things start to get different as kids abasically get to choose
their activities for the rest of the day. Children dont have to stay in one classroom
or stay with their peers in their group. Instead, they can choose to stay in the
classroom and play or head outside without waiting for the teachers (rather,
pedagogues in Denmark). There are always pedagogues around, but children are
left to their own devices to figure out what they want to do and who they want to do
it with. With the exception of lunch time and field trips, children determine their
regulated like those in America either. There are generally rope swings and other
things like that that allow for a certain level of risk for the children to learn about
their limits and what they can and cant do. The field trips that classes take at
Bornehavns also arent like those in the US where parents are notified a week in
advance and have to sign a permission slip (Danes would find this process hilarious
riding bikes to a nearby park or walking to another Bornehavn. Often children are
allowed to cross main roads on the way to these destinations and they are often
parent squirm especially in the absence of a permission slip because they wouldnt
Forest and nature schools are preschools where kids spend the majority of
their time outside and literally in large expanses of nature and forest. Kids are
allowed to venture on their own far off into wooded areas in the absence of their
pedagogues. When things go wrong (as they inevitably will) like someone falls and
scrapes their arm or, at worst, breaks something, the kids make sure to go get a
pedagogue to take care of their fallen peer. In this way, the children are both
responsible for their own play and safety as well. They learn responsibility as well
as what happens when they go past their own limits. Many Danish parents and
pedagogues will joke that kids wont learn unless they get a hurt a few times first.
Another interesting fact about these forest schools is the sheer amount of things
kids are allowed to do. There are usually sections where the kids are allowed to use
real tools such as saws and knives to cut branches or whittle sticks to their hearts
content. While there are certainly pedagogues watching the children use these
tools, they dont hover over the children and treat them with the respect they
deserve as they are competent with these tools. Kids climb trees, venture off
without supervision, and use tools and it is completely normalized. No Dane bats an
eyelash when they hear about these things because it is perfectly regular in their
culture.
An article in the Washington Post written by Clint Edwards and entitled
Lessons from The Goonies, and from the loss of unsupervised time for kids
perfectly outlines what the Danes value for their children in comparison to what has
grown to be normal in America. Edwards talks about how when he watched the
movie The Goonies with his son, his son asked the very pertinent question, where
are their parents? In America, this is completely the correct question to ask
because it is very unlikely that in todays world, kids would be able to go off on their
own and play or have adventures without the constant supervision of parents.
Parents in America have become so over protective that they dont allow their
children to engage in important behaviors that occur when they go off on their own
with friends. Danes obviously feel the exact opposite of American parents as they
incorporate this free play and alone-time into their educational system. Allowing
children to head off into wooded areas in groups of friends without being constantly
supervised allows them to have their own experience like the kids in The Goonies
education and are not afraid of telling their kids, even at a young age, about sex,
STDs, and contraceptives. The higher importance of teaching children about sexual
education coincides with a bunch of positive data concerning teen pregnancy and
abortion rates in Denmark. In an article outlining these statistics, per 1000 girls
aged 15-19 years old, 53 gave birth in the US whereas only 7 gave birth in
Denmark. Additionally, per 1000 women of child-bearing age, only 12.2 aborted
told in a lecture by Heidi Vikkelso Nielson (6/4/16), children are more likely to be
smart about engaging in sex if they choose to do so if there is mandatory sex
childrens questions. Nielson also noted that there is a sex line in Denmark that kids
can call to inquire about anything. Questions can range from how do I best
openness and less privacy concerning sexual activity, the culture encourages that
Another important factor in terms of Danish culture and how children are
raised is the society and the ways in which people generally interact. Danes
relatively carefree attitude probably stems from their ability to live in relative
comfort and stability with the knowledge that their higher taxes net them free
health care and education. This happy-go-lucky nature pervades all parts of Danish
culture, especially when it comes to alcohol. The drinking age, at least for beer, is
lowered to 16 and there are open container laws that allow people to drink outside
in public places. It is not out of the ordinary to see youths drinking in public (or
anyone for that matter). Many people will go to a park or street food and have a
couple drinks even during the work week because everything is much more relaxed
Alcohol pervades Danish culture thoroughly and has simply become a part of
life. For example, the article, Men can now urinate on Strogetlegally, in the
Copenhagen post, outlines how men are allowed to urinate on the street during a
music festival called Distortion now without getting fined if caught by the police.
This new law and placement of mobile urinals enables people (well, at least men)
to drink alcohol and not worry about peeing in public. Instead of making people
responsible for how much they drink or their actions due to how much they drink,
the Danish government just made it more acceptable to both drink and urinate in
permeates youth culture and is encouraged by society. Videos that are shown to
adolescents and their parents in order to get them to apply to specific high schools
make sure to touch upon partying and alcohol in addition to the academic programs
and facilities available to the kids. It is important to the Danes that their children
individuals. This tactic is almost the exact opposite of what is done to appeal to
parents and kids in America. Colleges do everything they can to downplay the
attending an institution.
On the topic of taxes and how Danes live less stressfully than most
Americans, two Danes in their mid-20s spoke to the Bucknell in Denmark class and
said that they [didnt] worry about 20 years down the road or saving money
(Anders and Marianne, 6/2/16). Those sentiments would shock many Americans
(and did!), whose entire existence is filled with worry about how comfortable
monetarily they will be 10 or 20 years down the line. It is not possible to relax
their children through college in addition to simply providing for themselves and
their families. Chris Boyatzis joked to the class that the second his daughter was
born, he had to start thinking about the cost of sending her to college down the line.
While comical at that age, it is not preposterous to worry about such things in
American culture, whereas Danes have the luxury of not having to worry about
paying for education ever (or at least for the most part).
Obviously Danish children grow up in a much different culture than do
growing up in a certain culture that dictate and ultimately shape how children are
raised and who they eventually become. Through the lenses of education, society,
relationship and family, children in all cultures are shaped by what is normal in their
country or place of origin. What may seem odd to someone from a different culture
is simply a reflection of different morals and needs that face those with differing
backgrounds.
Reflection
Studying abroad in Denmark, even for a measly 3-week period, definitely had
conflicting with the views of another culture. Additionally, the presence of Madison
on our trip really allowed me to see a side of things (politically) that I usually do not
hear or see much about. Going to a liberal arts institution like Bucknell and growing
up in the suburb of Beachwood, Ohio I had never really been exposed to many
conservative viewpoints, but having her on the trip to look at things in Denmark
through a few different lenses allowed me to really learn a lot about Denmark,
To begin with, there are certainly things that being in Denmark made me
appreciate more about American culture. The things that I appreciate in America
are less a result of disagreeing with Danish practices and more that I respect that
there are different ways to go about certain things. For example, I think that in the
American preschool system, it may be important for kids to start being taught in an
educational way because it will start preparing them for the rest of their educational
kids for that type of education from a young age. I wonder whether kids who had
the freedom to roam around throughout their younger years would be able to sit still
in an American classroom later in life. Perhaps, however, that very statement that I
just made about being able to sit still is yet another American cultural construct
that may or may not have anything to do with a childs ability to learn. Additionally,
I respect the rights afforded to parents in America in that they are allowed to raise
their children the way that they believe is right. Whether the way parents choose to
raise and discipline their children is agreed upon by all or only some, I think it
should be up to the parents (within reason of course) to make the decisions for
themselves. I dont know whether I think the government should have a place
In terms of things that I now tend to agree less with in America, there are
certainly a few. For example, like Denmark I now believe that sex education should
children from simple facts of life that could protect them should they decide to
engage in sexual behavior. Some parents would obviously oppose their children
being exposed to such information, especially at the young ages that Danes start
teaching their children (as Madison definitely said she would be). However, the
overwhelming statistics show that kids are smarter about engaging in sexual
behavior when they are well-taught about the process of sex itself as well as
learning about contraceptives and how to protect themselves from STDs and
pregnancy. Many parents in America tend to think that if they dont teach their
children about sex, then their children wont engage in the behavior, but that
thinking has shown to be ineffective and even dangerous. I also think that
American parents should follow in the Danes lead and stop being helicopter
parents. Kids are competent and capable of taking care of themselves and getting
Im extremely glad that I got to have this experience and I wont ever forget,
did! It was so unique from being a student at Bucknell because we got to immerse
going somewhere like South Africa or Japan, however there are so many things that
the Danes do differently than those of us in America. You just dont get the same
level of cultural diversity by walking around at Bucknell. There are those of us from
different backgrounds who were raised differently and who have different views, but
we are all Americans with generally the same cultural background because of that
underlying American in all of us. It was simply amazing to see how surprised Danes
were when we told them about things that were generally normal in America, like
how even preschools in the US are fairly educational and structured by the teacher
References
McClure, Scott. Discussion about Parenting and Living in Denmark with his
Girlfriend. 6/8/16
Edwards, Clint. Lessons from The Goonies, and from the loss of unsupervised
Men can now urinate on Strogetlegally. The Copenhagen Post. March 19, 2013
Anders and Marianne. Discussion about life in Denmark for Anders and Marianne.
6/2/16