MURDERED LOVED ONE 1

Murdered Loved One

Yvonne A. Igodo

American InterContinental University

Professor Duncan
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Abstract

To loss a loved one is a very tough ordeal to experience. To lose them by accident or illness is

very hard. It is not as hard as them being murdered. This makes the experience more

excruciating. It can be almost unbearable. The guilty party should they speak or not. We will

examine this issue.

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Murdered Loved One

This was one of the hardest papers I have ever had to write. My own sister was murdered

in August of 2000. This homework closely mirrors my exact experience. I was the one that had

to talk my family out of requesting the death penalty for the man who murdered my sister. It was

a very difficult time, I was able however to accomplish the task.. Now on to my paper.

The theories of morality, values and consequences. For the most part all of us as members

in society not as just individual beings have a sort of value or role in the morals of this world.

The opinion or principle of what is right or wrong. Morals is the basic structure of being just and

proper. It is held together by the other theories like values. It is what is just, fair for all people

who consider themselves moral. It is these principles that provide the fiber to the values in

place. (Silver, 2017)

Values is the importance or amount of worth that a person places on a thing. It determines

what choices that are being made, if a thing is valued. This is a very important factor to

consider when making decisions. These are standards of how to behave, and what things in life

are important. When dealing with this situation we must consider them all, even consequences.

(Cummins, 2016)

Consequences happen as a result of an action taken, or not taken. This is the outcome or

effect that will be had by whatever action is decided. It is a very hard situation to deal with I

know, but we must consider every detail and not just our pain. I know you dont want to discuss
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this but we must. Let me talk about the concept of restorative justice. This system in criminal

justice was developed to focus on the rehabilitation of offenders through reconciliation with the

victims. The main focus is retribution. (Cummins, 2016)

This meeting will allow the offender to become better, by allowing him to reconcile with us

for what he has done. He will have the opportunity to take responsibility for his actions and try

to right his wrongs by apologizing and asking forgiveness. You may not see it now but this

process is not just for him but us too. We need to allow it to happen. Forgiveness is for both

parties involved. For us as a family the healing process cant begin until there is forgiveness.

(Cummins, 2016)

Though we will never have our loved one back this is a type of restitution. Because our

family member was taken in an improper way from us. Usually this would have a substantial

bearing as far as assuring that he doesnt commit any further crimes. Since he is scheduled to be

executed, he deserves to confess his sins and be forgiven. So we need to consider this much like

our thought and concern for dying without making things right. We should allow this meeting.

Try and put your emotions aside and do what is right. If we do not choose to do the right thing,

then we become just like him. The actions he took were wrong, and ad a result he has to suffer

the consequences for his actions. (Cummins, 2016)

In this case is an execution. Imagine if you were dying, and you wanted to see someone

you wronged and were not able to. Or worse you request a priest but you are denied one. Can

you bear the thought of dying with the guilt on your heart, not able to confess and ask for
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forgiveness? I think if you examine carefully you will discover the answer is no. Let us agree to

make an ethical decision. Not one from hurt, anger or unforgiveness. (Newman, 1993)

To make a decision when there is an ethical dilemma is tough. There is really no wrong or

right answer. If reasoned properly it can assist with making the very difficult choice. So, let us

go thru the process. The facts are he murdered our loved one. This behavior was un-ethical.

Our family has suffered a great loss. (Newman, 1993)

As a result he the offender was given the death penalty and placed on death row. Now it is

time for him to face execution and he wants to meet with us to apologize. We must now

consider our own character and our own integrity. It is very necessary to resolve moral issues

before any other issues. This has everything to do with rights, values and fairness. Anything we

decide should be done using ethical behavior. (Newman, 1993)

Will the unethical actions of this offender cause us to lack character and integrity. Lets go

with our gut feelings and decide on an ethical action to take in this case. We cannot allow our

decision to be based off of anything other than what is the right thing to do. Our questions to

him should be as follows.

What made you do what you did? What do you feel about your actions. Do you regret

what you have done? Are you only sorry because you are going to die? What advice to you have

for anyone else that could end up on death row? More important than seeking our forgiveness,

have you asked God to forgive you? Have you given your life to Jesus?
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In my opinion there is no reason to deny this meeting. This meeting is two -fold. It will

allow him to ask for forgiveness and for us to grant it. Healing will happen for both of us, and it

is very necessary to move on. We will live in peace and he will die in peace. (Newman, 1993)
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References

Silver, J. R. (2017). Moral Foundations, Intuitions of Justice, and the Intricacies of Punitive

Sentiment. Law & Society Review, 51(2), 413-450. doi:10.1111/lasr.12264

Commins, S. (2016). Restorative Justice Practice: Rejection or Reflection of Social Work

Values?. Irish Probation Journal, 13194-207

Newman, K. L. (1993). Procedural Justice and Ethical Decision Making. Social Justice

Research, 6(1), 113-134.