1.

I would refuse to go into the underground research facility

2. I would refuse to go into the deep-space research facility

3. I would refuse to go into the deep-sea research facility

4. I would refuse to go into the radio-blacked colony

5. I would refuse to go into the derelict alien ship

6. I would refuse to go into the abandoned ghost ship

7. If I was then forced into attempting any of the above six missions, I would attempt to go AWOL. Prison showers are almost certainly
preferable to what awaits

8. When going on a mission, I would certainly carry more than one gun. I would carry as many as humanely possible

9. In line with #8, I would carry more than one clip per gun. I have a belt, and I intend to fill it

10. If the hallways of the operations area are big enough to allow it, I intend to bring along a small field artillery piece as well

11. No matter what my commanding officer says, If my job is to plant a nuclear device to destroy the facility/ship, it is not necessary for me
to endanger my life by traveling to the center of the structure to plant the bomb, I'm sure the entrance will prove just as effective

12. If my job is to disable the A/I system that runs the facility ship, and this would require me to go to the center of the structure, I will just
plant a small nuclear device at the entrance. If the blast doesn't get it, the EMP will

13. If I am equipped with body armor, and it proves ineffective against whatever killed everyone in the facility/ship, I will ditch it and use the
saved weight to carry more guns

14. Along the same lines, if the body armor is ineffective and so are the guns, I will ditch both and set a new track record on my way out of
the ops area

15. I will refuse to wear a helmet that restricts my peripheral vision and does not allow me to see something rising up/dropping down right
beside me

16. I will request to be equipped with a helmet that has a small HUD linked to a camera on the back of my helmet. An additional HUD linked
to an upward-pointing top mounted camera would be nice as well

17. If am going into some top secret facility that has lost radio communications with the outside world, I will be damn sure that I am in
possession of a high quality, up to date map in a form that will not be rendered unreadable by contact with liquid

18. If I could not obtain a map, and found myself lost/trapped in the facility, I would not rely on the unstable, homicidal central A/I to
provide me with escape routes

19. If i am inside a facility/ship after the stuff has hit the fan, and find myself without a map, i will head to the nearest computer terminal
and consult Yahoo Maps. The facility was built by a corporation or the government, and they can certainly afford an internet connection

20. If there is a self-destruct mechanism or impenetrable blast doors set on a running timer within the building/ship i am ordered to enter, i
will guard the entrances until the timer runs, then leave. the problem will take care of itself eventually, so there is no need to risk myself

21. If mine is not the first team to be sent into the area, i will take a little time off to wonder why

22. If the music suddenly starts getting really creepy, i will start spinning around with my finger on the trigger. whoever was guarding my
back is probably gone by this point anyway

23. Before i go on each mission, i will rent Aliens, Resident Evil, Event Horizon, and other similar movies for pointers. i will defer the cots to
my employer as "training expenses"

24. If there is something dripping from the ceiling up ahead, i won't bother to check if it's just water, i will leave the area immediately by the
quickest possible route

25. If I hear odd noises, I will not be foolish enough to investigate it alone. I will take a friend. Or two. With big guns

26. If I am ordered to investigate the noise by my commanding officer, I will take everyone else in the squad with me. By the time we return
to where the CO was waiting, the problem will probably have solved itself

27. If I am forced to walk underneath a hole in the ceiling, I will be cautious. I will investigate it thoroughly with high explosives

28. Likewise, If I hear odd noises coming from the ceiling, I will not lift up a panel and stick my head up to have a look around. I will lift up
the panel and shove a grenade up there
29. Similarly, if I am forced to pass a hole/grate in the walls or floor, I will throw a grenade in to make sure its clear now, and set proximity
mines to make sure it is clear later

30. Unless it is my last chance for survival, I will never go into any type of ventilation shaft. I know that whatever chased me up there will
almost certainly be able to move faster than me in an enclosed space

31. I will always take some sort of sword with me in addition to a multitude of projectile weapons. That way, when I run out of ammunition,
and I will, I won't have to ineffectually slap at an opponent before being killed.

31a. Along similar lines, if I am issued only laser/particle beam/mag-accelerated weapons, I will acquire and carry a gunpowder slugthrower.
Thus, if something nullifies electronics, I can still shoot whatever wants to eat me

32. Knowingly entering a facility where illegal genetic research is being performed would be consigning myself to death by stupidity.
Therefore, I wouldn't enter, even if this entailed killing the rest of my team to avoid it

33. I would never enter a dark room. I would throw in a handful of grenades and move on, assured that if anything is still alive in there, it
isn't happy

34. I wont make the mistake of shooting something with my smallest gun first, and then working my way up through the larger firearms. I
would start with my biggest gun, and if that didn't work, run like hell

35. If I was sent off with only one companion, I would make sure it is someone I could outrun. That way, I can get away while whatever
was chasing us chews on him

36. If there are women on the team, I will never sleep with them right before a mission. One or the other of us will almost certainly not
make it back, and I don't like 50/50 odds

37. If a team-member disappears mysteriously for a long period of time and the just as mysteriously reappears, I will shoot them
immediately and save myself a lot of trouble

38. I will periodically look up. The importance of this can never be overstated

39. If I am in a genetic research lab and there are lots of cages whose steel doors have been torn out, I will think about how much
punishment those doors could take. Then I will think about how much punishment my frail human body can take. Then I will start thinking
about where those exits were

40. No matter how tempted I am, I will never deactivate the main power grid in a research facility. I know there is a reason that those doors
are magnetically locked and electrified

41. I will also never deactivate the main computer in a facility. Even though its automated defenses may be slaughtering the rest of the
team, they are still holding back whatever killed the original occupants

42. I will stay away from any elevators. Nothing good ever comes from an elevator in these situations

43. I will never negotiate with whatever is trying to kill my team. The dialogue will almost certainly be along the lines of "Me hungry, you
food"

44. If one of my team-members gets bitten, cut, sprayed with, or otherwise exposed to a bio-agent, I will kill them immediately. They will
only turn on me, and the antidote never works anyway

45. The sexiest female will always make it out, mainly because she is surrounded by men who willingly throw themselves in the path of
anything that attempts to harm her. I will stay close to that female, and when I am the last male left, I will throw her in the path of
whatever is attempting to harm us

46. I will make sure that when I finally make my exit from the ops area, I have conserved a decent amount of ammunition. Something
always goes wrong during the escape

47. If I find only one survivor from among 500 or so people, I will not trust them. They had to do something to survive the carnage that
killed 500 people, and I don't think it was just run really fast

48. I will make sure the team will under no circumstances split up. It never helps

49. If upon arriving in the ops area I hear a lot of screams from inside or see a lot of obviously mutilated dead bodies, I will leave the ops
area and come back later. With more people. And bigger guns

50. I will train myself to keep my cool under pressure well enough to hit a head sized target at a range of 10 feet

51. I will request that any ops team I am a part of be issued body armor with environmental resistance, which provides protection from
things like fire, airborne viruses, and acid
52. I will also request that aforementioned armor have a reflective mirrored surface, to help with those pesky automated laser defenses

53. If I see something in the shadows up ahead that at first glance does not appear human, I will forgo taking the time for a second look
and lob a grenade at it instead

54. If I see something in the shadows up ahead that at first glance appears vaguely human, I will forgo taking the time for a second look
and lob a grenade at it instead

55. If I see something in the shadows up ahead that at first glance appears human, I will forgo taking the time for a second look and lob a
grenade at it instead. Better safe than sorry

55a. If I see something in the shadows up ahead I will forgo taking the time for a second look and lob a grenade at it instead. Better safe
than sorry

56. If multiple survivors are found during the course of the mission, they will be given a gun and told to make themselves useful

57. However, if these survivors created or want to study whatever depopulated the facility/ship, they will not be given guns as they cannot
be trusted to use them at the crucial moment, due to their conflict of interests

58. Between missions I will lobby for legislature to require all secret research facilities to have heavily stocked ammo dumps in easily
accessible, well marked locations

59. If my team is required to use motion detectors, they better be able to scan 360 degrees, not merely 90

60. If the body count is currently over 500, I will politely inform my superiors that an 8-man operations team isn't going to cut it

61. If any member of the team is prone to claustrophobia, diver's high, space-mania, or panic attacks, I will deliver a request to the CO that
they be left behind, instead of just being given a pep talk

62. If any member of the team proves to be a corporate/government spy, I will shoot them before anyone else can react, saving the trouble
of taking them prisoner only so they can escape later and sabotage the mission

62a. If there is a sudden illness with any member of my team and a new member is added at the last minute, I will shoot them before
anyone else can react

63. I will recommend that any form of transportation we have be parked well away from the trouble spot, and that the operator stays in it
and keeps the doors sealed until the team is standing outside and ready to leave

63a. If my escape vehicle was on the ground the entire time I was fighting the monster/alien/genetic abomination/etc. I will destroy it.
Whatever I thought I killed was on board

64. If we have a spare transport I will recommend that we have a spare pilot as well, to save having to remote control fly the transport in if
something happens to the first

65. If any member of the team takes a revolver on the mission, I will take it from them, hand them an automatic, and then slap them silly
for being so stupid

66. I will ensure that all guns have perfectly calibrated laser sights, even if I must pay for them myself, so that missing a headshot is
inexcusable

67. If the team gets out of an operations area and find we are missing a man, I will recommend we leave his ass. He should have kept up in
the first place

68. If our mission is to shut down a rogue A/I, I will not discuss our plans in any room with a visible camera and/or audio pickup

69. Screw shoulder-mounted flashlights, I'll carry a pair of night vision goggles even if the cost has to come out of my paycheck

70. The same goes for little pen-lights. I will carry a 3 foot mag-lite with a halogen bulb. That way, not only do I get a huge flashlight range,
it can double as a club in tight situations

70a. I will remember that if the monstrous creature is within clubbing range, it is a tight situation, and start clubbing. This is true even if my
firearm still works. No reason not to club and shoot at the same time

71. If I am low on ammunition, I won't hesitate to roll the bodies of my teammates for ammo. They certainly don't need it anymore

72. If I learn that the beings we are fighting have acid for blood or that their blood contains some sort of bio-agent, I will make damn sure I
am at least 15 feet away from any I shoot

73. If my team possesses an APC, but it won't fit into the corridors of the ops area, I'll rectify the situation with explosives instead of going
in on foot
74. Just in case my opponents will be using cloaking devices that short out upon contact with water, I will always carry a small super-soaker
pistol with me on missions

75. If I am forced to pick a position within a facility from which to make a last stand, it will not be a room which can easily be breached by
going above the ceiling or under the floor

76. If I hear a low hissing or moaning directly behind me, I will take off running without thinking. Whatever it is, its first bite of me is going
to be ass

77. If anyone in the squad has a flamethrower, I will make sure everyone else is trained to instinctively duck whenever he even begins to
turn around

78. When the team's mission is to plant a bomb I will make sure we have more than one bomb, and more than one person who knows how
to plant it

79. If I am going into an area in where research in biological warfare was occurring, I will not remove my gas mask before entering the
facility

80. If there is a countdown to an explosion or the sealing off of the facility, I will set my watch timer 10 minutes ahead of that to give myself
a margin of safety

81. If any of the people we've rescued or one of my team members starts to convulse and scream, Ill have the guy with the flamethrower
hose them down and then move on. If it is the napalm guy I'll just shoot the tank. Whatever made them do it, I seriously doubt it was a
cramp

82. If my team has heavy weaponry with us, I will not wait until there are only a few people left and we are surrounded and in dire straits to
use them. I will use them as early and as often as possible

83. Similarly, if I have a large ship in orbit over the planet, and find out that there are no survivors in a heavily infested area, I will call for an
orbital bombardment of the hot zone

84. If I hear odd noises coming from a grate nearby, I won't stare quizzically at it and shine a weak flashlight beam through the grate, I will
immediately empty my current clip into the grate then kick it in and send a grenade into the tunnel

85. If we have prisoners, and one of them is talking to me steadily in a calm voice while staring behind me, I will immediately dive to the
side and roll to hose whatever was about to attack me. I will show the same response if a team-member looks behind me with an expression
of horror

86. If I address a query to the guy that should be behind me, and receive no immediate response, I will immediately break into a dead run,
dropping grenades along the way

87. If I find that rooms marked on my map as dining halls turn out to be full of stasis chambers and odd piping instead, I will immediately
leave the ops area and refuse to enter until I get a damn good explanation

88. If we manage to ambush whatever was killing us, and I hear a high pitched beeping and it starts laughing, I will be smart enough to just
start running, instead of searching it for the timer

89. I will never walk through water any deeper than I can see down into. I won't walk in the water period if there is electric cabling nearby

90. Any transports that we bring into the ops area and intend to use to escape will have cameras on the outside to allow us to scan for
unwanted guests

91. Along the same line, the landing bay/pad we return to will have several large turrets to take care of any stowaways we miss

92. I will point out to my superiors that if the corporation/government has enough money to fund an 8 man black ops team, they have
enough damn money to buy us a remote controlled robot with cameras that we can send in to scout the area first

93. My favored method of advance down a dark corridor will be with a five-man team, the first man hosing down the corridor in front, the
second throwing a grenade, the third hauling the huge cart of ammo and explosives, the fourth throwing a grenade behind us, and the fifth
hosing down the corridor behind. Take ten steps, repeat

94. My favored method of advance down a well-lit corridor will be with a five man team, the first man hosing down the corridor in front, the
second throwing a grenade, the third hauling the huge cart of ammo and explosives, the fourth throwing a grenade behind us, and the fifth
hosing down the corridor behind. Take ten steps, repeat

95. If a cat comes flying out of a vent, scaring the crap out of me, I will unload a clip into the vent. *Something* scared the cat

95a. I will shoot any cat encountered during the mission

96. I will hold the belief that heavy breathing from the nearby darkness is not to be investigated. It is to be used for target practice
97. Warning shots are for wusses. Fire for effect, that's my motto

98. If the other people with me have all disappeared, I won't bother wandering around the immediate area looking for them and yelling their
names, peering into dark rooms

99. When any member of my squad dies, I will have them hosed down with the flamethrower or plant a proximity mine on them. No use
feeding or increasing the numbers of whatever is trying to kill us

100. If I die on a mission, it will be because I snapped my neck trying to look everywhere at once

101. I will never show any members of the mission pictures of my fiance/wife/kids who I can't wait to get back to after the mission is over

102. I will never discuss with anyone the length of my enlistment and brag how "short" I am

103. I will never discuss with anyone the fact that this is my last mission before retirement

104. I will kill every new life form I encounter. A dead life form is just as valuable to the scientist back home as a live one is

105. I will nuke the site from orbit. It's the only way to be sure

106. i will kill everyone i encounter in suspended animation. They won't feel it anyway

107. I will obey orders, not be overly comical or friendly with civilians present, i will not swear and i will not be immoral. I do not wish to die
first as an example of how bad our enemies are

107a. I will not be ethnic