Honor and the Sentiments of Loss in a Bedouin Society
Lila Abu-Lughod
American Ethnologist, Vol. 12, No. 2 (May, 1985), 245-261.
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‘Mon Sep 27 11:32:32 2004honor and the sentiments of loss in a Bedouin society
LILA ABU-LUGHOD—Witliams College
1984 Stating Award for Conteibutions ta Psychological Anthronalogy
Saliyya, a middle-aged Enyptian Bedouin woman, talked about her divorce tram the man to
whom she had ueen maried for 20 years
My youngest daughter was using in my ares when ne etme twas sick and ted “The man’ came
upto me one steron 2s sat by the oven He ai, ou" dwotced Tad, "Tanks hats ost me
faye" did't want him don wart ayitng am him except bud me ahaute ove nth ry
sons place where can fel ae home, cnt care when he vores me. never ied im. He had
{then srsher we but hat dnt other me. never fought wth Why shoud? These things dont
boners
‘Yer twa days late, when a conversation between Saiyya and several other women in het
household wened tothe whereabouts of her exchusband, away on ap at the time, she sud
deniy rected the following shor poem:"
Marexis steed by mention ofthe beloved thats sin Sone
‘foul velease, Fa find mye loaded Al nashal bin
‘The frst time I had met her had been with another young worran, an Egyptian university
student. Salivya had asked either of us was mamed. Bath of us eeplied inthe negative. She
leaned over and advised us earnestly, “Dont eves get married. What would you want with
marriage? Men are just sons of bitches. They do you ro good." A few months ater had begun
living nthe cornmunity, Ishowed my taperecardectoa group of wornen for thefstiime, Some
volunteered ta sing, including Safiya. The song she offered was the following
‘Oh eyes te trong varsar dian “azn
‘you cherish pepe and then they're gore fehl arab wyfarga
CS EEE
Seginning with the observation that among the Awlad Ali Bedlouins of the Egyp~
tian Western Desert individuals respand to personal loss with two contradictory
Sets of sentiments, one expressed in ordinary language and public interactions and
the othe: expressed in a form of poignant lyric poeuy spontaneously recited in
intimate contexts, this paper explares the significance of the coexistence of dis