Everand Logo

Welcome to Everand!

  • Discover millions of ebooks, audiobooks, and so much more with a free trial

    Only $11.99/month after trial. Cancel anytime.

    The Hidden Rules of Successful Negotiation and Communication: Getting to Yes!
    The Hidden Rules of Successful Negotiation and Communication: Getting to Yes!
    The Hidden Rules of Successful Negotiation and Communication: Getting to Yes!
    Ebook240 pages3 hours

    The Hidden Rules of Successful Negotiation and Communication: Getting to Yes!

    By Marc O. Opresnik

    ()

    Read preview

    About this ebook

    Negotiations in professional or private life often take an unsatisfactory course due to stress, confrontation with aggressive or unfair behavior, or because of overwhelming situations.
    Negotiations generally require a thorough preparation, strategy and a sophisticated tactic to make us feel safe in the presentation of our goals and arrive at a mutually satisfactory outcome. Conventional books about negotiations are usually limited to strategies and techniques, but leave out elements of psychological communication and emotional intelligence, which include non-verbal communication and empathy, which in turn are essential for successful negotiation. Therefore, this book on the one hand constitutes the essential techniques and strategies in the context of negotiation, but also considers "soft skills" without which negotiations cannot be successful.
    This book presents practical examples in dealing with situations such as salary, contract and sales negotiations. In particular on context and time appropriate negotiation techniques; analyzing negotiation partners and their motives; interpret group processes, and how to successfully implement negotiation psychology.
    LanguageEnglish
    PublisherSpringer
    Release dateJun 17, 2014
    ISBN9783319061948
    The Hidden Rules of Successful Negotiation and Communication: Getting to Yes!

    Related to The Hidden Rules of Successful Negotiation and Communication

    Titles in the series (100)

    View More
    View More

    Related ebooks

    Psychology For You

    View More
    View More

    Related podcast episodes

    Related articles

    • Article

      A New Way To Look At Negotiation

      Oct 3, 2019

      A New Way To Look At Negotiation
      8 min read

    • Article

      Crack The Code

      Apr 11, 2024

      Crack The Code
      8 min read

    • Article

      The Big Buy-in

      Mar 24, 2021

      The Big Buy-in
      2 min read

    • Article

      Do You Need a Coach?

      Sep 21, 2016

      Maybe, if it’s the boss who is becoming the weak link when trying to figure out critical issues

      3 min read

    • Article

      The Art Of Persuasion

      Jul 6, 2021

      The Art Of Persuasion
      3 min read

    • Article

      How Important Is Negotiation?

      Feb 27, 2020

      One of the most important parts of owning investment property is the art of negotiation. We negotiate every day and almost every hour of our life. We negotiate with our kids, spouses, workmates, and when we cross the road. Almost everything we do in

      2 min read

    • Article

      Why Soft Skills Matter

      May 20, 2022

      Why Soft Skills Matter
      4 min read

    • Article

      8 Skills To Achieve Success

      Aug 25, 2022

      8 Skills To Achieve Success
      5 min read

    • Article

      Finding The Right Mentor To Help Grow Your Business

      May 2, 2021

      ANY business owner worth their salt can acknowledge the fact that there is always something new to learn about their business or market. The value of learning from other, more experienced entrepreneurs, especially when starting a new company and guid

      3 min read

    • Article

      Finding The Right Mentor To Help Grow Your Business

      May 2, 2021

      ANY business owner worth their salt can acknowledge the fact that there is always something new to learn about their business or market. The value of learning from other, more experienced entrepreneurs, especially when starting a new company and guid

      3 min read

    • Article

      Investing In Uncertain Times

      Sep 30, 2021

      People often refer to this as “What is your why?” In other words, what is the reason you are wanting to invest? Is it to help fund your retirement? Is it to get out of your day job before the age of 65? Is it to help your children financially? Or som

      3 min read

    • Article

      Be A Leader

      Dec 11, 2020

      Be A Leader
      1 min read

    • Article

      Conflict In The Workplace: We Need To Talk

      Nov 25, 2021

      Thank you for sparing the time to talk to us, Mr Liddle! Could we begin with a few words on what made you pursue a career in conflict resolution? Following my first degree in Race Relations in the late 1980s and early 90s, I worked in a large UK cit

      8 min read

    • Article

      The Roots of Entrepreneurial Success

      Jan 1, 2020

      You have been involved in start-ups for many years as a founder, co-founder and Chief Technology Officer. In your experience, does entrepreneurship demand specific traits, or can anyone with a great idea do it? I don’t subscribe to the idea that it t

      6 min read

    Related categories

    Reviews for The Hidden Rules of Successful Negotiation and Communication

    0 ratings

    0 ratings0 reviews

    What did you think?

    Tap to rate

    Review must be at least 10 words

      Book preview

      The Hidden Rules of Successful Negotiation and Communication - Marc O. Opresnik

      Marc O. OpresnikManagement for ProfessionalsThe Hidden Rules of Successful Negotiation and Communication2014Getting to Yes!10.1007/978-3-319-06194-8© Springer International Publishing Switzerland 2014

      Management for Professionals

      For further volumes: http://​www.​springer.​com/​series/​10101

      Marc O. Opresnik

      The Hidden Rules of Successful Negotiation and CommunicationGetting to Yes!

      A322338_1_En_BookFrontmatter_Figa_HTML.png

      Marc O. Opresnik

      Luebeck University of Applied Sciences, Luebeck, Germany

      ISSN 2192-8096e-ISSN 2192-810X

      ISBN 978-3-319-06193-1e-ISBN 978-3-319-06194-8

      Springer Cham Heidelberg New York Dordrecht London

      Library of Congress Control Number: 2014942867

      © Springer International Publishing Switzerland 2014

      Translation from the German language edition:

      Die Geheimnisse erfolgreicher Verhandlungsführung by Marc Opresnik

      Copyright © Springer Gabler 2013

      Springer Gabler is part of Springer Science+Business Media.

      All Rights Reserved.

      This work is subject to copyright. All rights are reserved by the Publisher, whether the whole or part of the material is concerned, specifically the rights of translation, reprinting, reuse of illustrations, recitation, broadcasting, reproduction on microfilms or in any other physical way, and transmission or information storage and retrieval, electronic adaptation, computer software, or by similar or dissimilar methodology now known or hereafter developed. Exempted from this legal reservation are brief excerpts in connection with reviews or scholarly analysis or material supplied specifically for the purpose of being entered and executed on a computer system, for exclusive use by the purchaser of the work. Duplication of this publication or parts thereof is permitted only under the provisions of the Copyright Law of the Publisher’s location, in its current version, and permission for use must always be obtained from Springer. Permissions for use may be obtained through RightsLink at the Copyright Clearance Center. Violations are liable to prosecution under the respective Copyright Law.

      The use of general descriptive names, registered names, trademarks, service marks, etc. in this publication does not imply, even in the absence of a specific statement, that such names are exempt from the relevant protective laws and regulations and therefore free for general use.

      While the advice and information in this book are believed to be true and accurate at the date of publication, neither the authors nor the editors nor the publisher can accept any legal responsibility for any errors or omissions that may be made. The publisher makes no warranty, express or implied, with respect to the material contained herein.

      Printed on acid-free paper

      Springer is part of Springer Science+Business Media (www.springer.com)

      For my family

      Introduction: You Must Always and 40 Everywhere Negotiate

      There are many books that will tell you the secrets of negotiation. Conventional books about negotiation are usually limited to strategies and techniques and often ignore crucial forms of communication and especially emotional intelligence, including nonverbal communication and empathy. All of these are essential for successful negotiations. Admittedly, these are diffuse and dazzling terms and it is not easy to formulate the associated phenomena clearly and unambiguously. However, this is precisely the objective of this guidebook.

      Therefore, this book is unique in that it brings together essential techniques and strategies in the context of negotiation, and considers them in relation to the so-called soft skills without which negotiations cannot successfully be sustained.

      Whether you work in the private sector, as a self-employed person or for a public authority, whether you belong to an association or work in completely different fields, every day you negotiate, whether in your private or professional life. However, it can often take an unsatisfactory course, perhaps because you are stressed or because you are faced with aggressive or unfair behavior, or simply because you are overwhelmed by a situation. Without knowledge of specific strategies, of targeted tactics and without feeling like you can make a success out of communication and negotiation situations, you cannot reach your goals. Whether you want to negotiate successfully in business or personal situations, you simply need to know the following:

      What characterizes a negotiation and what phases it goes through

      What techniques and tools can be used

      How the tension between cooperation and conflict can be managed

      What reasoning patterns exist and how they are used

      How to handle difficult situations

      What tweaks and tricks exist.

      This guide will help you better understand negotiations in all situations and forms. You will learn proven negotiation techniques and how to analyze negotiation partners and their motives thoroughly, as well as understanding group processes. I also suggest how you can keep a cool head in difficult situations while competently implementing findings derived from negotiation psychology to help you.

      But that’s not all. This book is like a guide through the ups and downs of negotiations. All the insights will naturally be explained, but you will also learn how to arrive at them. So here you will read, for example, not only that you need confidence and a positive basis for discussion in order to negotiate successfully, but you also need to learn how to build trust and a good basis for negotiation and maintain this—all written in a concise and easy to understand manner. Additionally you will receive valuable advice on how to make negotiations and communication successful based on numerous practical examples and the advice of prominent personalities, such as the TV journalist and presenter Dr. Sandra Maria Gronewald , the former Chairman of the German Council of Economic Experts Professor Dr. Bert Rürup , and the CEO of Dräger Verwaltungs AG Stefan Dräger , and many others, all of whom have been exclusively interviewed for this book.

      This guide therefore has two goals: to provide all the theoretical tools that you need to analyze your negotiating situation with regard to your objectives and the specific resistances which you will be confronted with, and how practically to improve the results of your negotiating.

      Experience teaches that many no-holds-barred negotiations entail battles that bring us to the edge of our ethical limits. This guide gives you advice and information about the most appropriate mitigation strategies for achieving a balance.

      The structure of the book corresponds to the phases of a transaction. Chapter 1 describes what a negotiation actually is, what sets it apart, and how the success of a transaction can be measured. In Chaps. 2 and 3 , you will learn how to optimize negotiations by creating an ideal atmosphere and provide through self-motivation the most promising setting. Creating trust and a positive basis for conversations and for finding out the aims and intentions of your contact is presented in Chaps. 4 and 5 . Chapter 6 deals with the most important persuasion techniques and shows you how to harness the power of language and so be successful using both body language and voice. In Chap. 7 you will learn how to respond to objections. After the presentation of special features relating to the context of price negotiations in Chap. 8 , how to arrive at a good conclusion is discussed in Chap. 9 . The final chapter deals with the benefits for your development of a comprehensive follow-up and as a prerequisite for any attentive professional.

      Before we start, let me offer two basic observations: The German language distinguishes between him and her. Hereafter the exclusive use of him is always meant to intend they and addresses both sexes.

      The advice contained in this book brings you closer to important principles that are not only necessary in the context of negotiations but which are in principle applicable to any situation in which you build trust, identify arguments, counter objections, and consistently work towards an ambitious target. This book is thus—regardless of education, occupation, age, and gender—relevant to all people who want or need to negotiate or communicate successfully in professional and personal situations. Of course this applies to every individual reader when figuring out which personality type best matches specific strategies and techniques. In some areas you may also be able to build on previously acquired negotiation skills and experience, while in other areas this guide will provide the necessary eureka effect.

      This book will thus be a real guide. Apply yourself to the appropriate concepts and practical advice contained within it! Train your skills! Everywhere you will find opportunities for negotiating, whether in business, in the office, on the phone, at the kitchen table with friends, bosses, colleagues, customers, and partners. When the Irish–British playwright and Nobel laureate George Bernard Shaw was asked how he had learned to be so compelling and engaging a speaker, he replied: I’ve learned it the same way I learned to skate—with perseverance I made a fool of myself until I could do it.

      By intensive reading and working with this book and by applying the tools it contains for successful negotiations in your daily life, you will become a negotiation professional!

      Acknowledgements

      Marc Oliver Opresnik

      First of all I want to thank you the reader for spending a piece of your life by reading this guide to the end.

      Next, I wish to thank all my interview and conversation partners whose outstanding experience on the subject of negotiations have been incorporated into this book, and who have given me invaluable advice: Winfried Brüggmann (Managing Director of Igepa GmbH & Co. KG), Carsten Cramer (Director of Marketing and authorized signatory of Borussia Dortmund GmbH & Co. KGaA), Stefan Dräger (CEO of Dräger Verwaltungs AG), Ralf Drews (CEO of FARO Europe GmbH & Co.KG), Pit Gottschalk (journalist and media manager at Axel Springer AG), Nicola Harder (Advisor for Communication and director for the company sense of language), Christoph Keese (manager and journalist at Axel Springer AG), Dr. Sandra Maria Gronewaldstraße (presenter and journalist), Dr. Dietmar Otti (Managing Director Marketing at Axel Springer Media Impact), Prof. Dr. Dr. hc Bert Rürup (former Chairman of the German Council of Economic Experts), Heinz Schelwat (Managing Sea & Sun Technology GmbH), Prof. Dr. Ibrahim Sirkeci (Professor of Marketing at the European Business School in London), Dr. Arne Wieben (senior government official), and Jörg Wienke (General Manager of the Shell gas station business Oil GmbH, Germany).

      I also wish to thank Springer publishers, Mr. Michael Bursik and Dr. Prashanth Mahagaonkar , for their great service and expert advice. They supported the entire development of the book with great proficiency.

      Furthermore, I would like to thank Dr. Ian Copestake for the translation of the book into English. He stood by me with advice and assistance and managed the entire translation of the book with great professionalism.

      I would also like to thank all the authors who I quote in this book and whose ideas have been incorporated into it. Their wisdom and great works have enriched and inspired me.

      The contents of this guide have been used in many training and coaching sessions and seminars at various universities and in numerous companies and institutions. Based on the feedback I received from my participants and students, I was able to test the strategies outlined in this book and the concepts and ideas again and again to confirm their practicality and comprehensibility. I therefore thank all those participants and students for their open and detailed feedback.

      Finally, I would like to give special thanks to my family, which has supported me throughout this great project. Over the past months they have shown great forbearance and love without which the writing of this book would not have been possible. I know all that I owe you!

      September 2014

      Contents

      1 How You Learn to Successfully Negotiate 1

      1.​1 What Is Basically at Stake in Negotiating?​ 1

      1.​2 How Can You Measure the Success of a Negotiation?​ 2

      1.​3 The Biggest Mistake that You Can Commit While Negotiating 5

      1.​4 Your Personal Negotiation:​ Competitive Versus Cooperative Bargaining 6

      1.​5 Understand Negotiation as a Process 10

      2 Prepare for the Negotiation in Advance 13

      2.​1 Without Goals It Does Not Work 15

      2.​2 Where Does the Other Stand?​ 17

      2.​3 The Personal Style:​ Recognize Yourself and Others 23

      2.​4 Create the Perfect Atmosphere 27

      3 Gain Self-Motivation Through the Right Attitude 33

      3.​1 The Right Mood and Attitude 33

      3.​2 Sources of Motivation 37

      3.​3 Thoughts Are a Two Way Street 38

      4 Create Confidence and a Positive Basis for Discussion by the Proper Greeting 41

      4.​1 First Impressions 41

      4.​2 Clothes Make the Man 42

      4.​3 The Well Chosen Handshake and the Proper Greeting 43

      5 Find Out the Objectives of Your Negotiating Partner 47

      5.​1 Be Aware of the Importance of Body Language 47

      5.​2 Who, How, What?​ Anyone Who Does Not Ask Remains Stupid 56

      5.​3 Listening Is Also an Art 58

      6 Always Negotiate with a Sense of the Benefits for Your Negotiating Partner 63

      6.​1 Be a Problem Solver, and Provide Individual Benefit 64

      6.​2 Take the Self-esteem of Your Negotiation Partner into Account 68

      6.​3 Be Aware of the Different Levels of Communication 70

      6.​4 Use the Power and Magic of Language 74

      6.​5 Use the Secret Psychology of Influence 78

      6.​6 Make Use of Feedback Techniques to Improve Negotiations 95

      6.​7 Help Your Negotiators to Convince Themselves 98

      7 How to Respond to Objections and What to Do When It Gets Tough 101

      7.​1 Regard Every Objection as a Means to a Successful Conclusion 101

      7.​2 How to Meet Objections Effectively 102

      7.​3 What to Do if the Partner Is Unfair 104

      8 Special Aspects of Price Negotiations 107

      8.​1 Why It Pays Off to Enforce Prices 107

      8.​2 Benefit-Oriented Sales and Higher Prices Through Higher Value 111

      8.​3 Create Alternatives, and Create a List of Concessions 114

      9 To Come to a Good Conclusion 119

      9.​1 To Ensure the Success of the Negotiation 119

      9.​2 What to Do If the Negotiators Still Hesitate?​ 120

      9.​3 Negotiating the Relationship 121

      10 After the Negotiation Is Before the Negotiation 125

      10.​1 Analyze the Satisfaction of Your Negotiation Partner 125

      10.​2 Reflect on the Transaction, and Document the Results 125

      10.​3 Maintain and Use the Relationship 126

      Final Word: Practice Makes Perfect129

      Give Me Your Feedback!131

      About the Author133

      Bibliography135

      Marc O. OpresnikManagement for ProfessionalsThe Hidden Rules of Successful Negotiation and Communication2014Getting to Yes!10.1007/978-3-319-06194-8_1

      © Springer International Publishing Switzerland 2014

      1. How You Learn to Successfully Negotiate

      Marc O. Opresnik¹ 

      (1)

      Luebeck University of Applied Sciences, Luebeck, Germany

      Abstract

      1.

      Negotiation is your daily business. You do it day in, day out.

      2.

      Negotiations are basically found in three areas: conflicts, relationships, transactions.

      3.

      We talk in the classical sense of negotiation when persons or parties pursue different interests and communicate with each other to reach an agreement.

      4.

      The zone of agreement in the field of negotiation is referred to as the ZOPA (Zone of Possible Agreement).

      5.

      For assessing the success of a negotiation, it is necessary to know its best alternative to negotiated agreement (BATNA) and of course to also know about the other party’s.

      6.

      The biggest mistakes that you can make while negotiating are: exerting pressure, lack of flexibility, aggression, compliance and inadequate preparation.

      1.1 What Is Basically at Stake in Negotiating?

      When was the last time you negotiated? This morning with your life partner when planning a short vacation together? With your children, who feel that they need more money? With your colleagues, who wish to take a holiday at the same time as you? Your supervisor over a raise, which in your opinion you have long deserved? With a demanding customer whose requirements are always changing and who demands ever improved terms?

      Every person, from schoolchild to pensioner, leads per day on average 3–5 negotiations outside the family. Negotiation is thus our daily business and we do it day in, day out. Negotiating is so natural to us that we need to consider it as part of our range of communication and indeed as a special form of communication. The truly remarkable thing is that often we are not even aware of the fact that we actually negotiate. If you want to negotiate more effectively, the first step is to gain the awareness that you are constantly negotiating in your daily life.

      Negotiations are basically found in three areas:

      Conflicts: resolve disputes, solve problems and disagreements

      Relationship: to establish, strengthen, and protect relationships

      Transactions: in conducting business and projects, sales or any other form of transaction

      Given these contexts, a few basic concepts first need to be clarified: What do we mean by negotiation? Is every conversation, every discussion, every meeting always automatically and equally a negotiation? How can we measure the success of a negotiation, what are the worst mistakes that can occur while negotiating and what negotiation styles can be identified?

      In the classic sense we talk of negotiation when persons or parties pursue different interests and communicate with each other to reach an agreement.

      To negotiate, certain conditions must be met:

      at least two parties or people, sometimes more

      a certain degree of interdependence

      a roughly well-balanced power relationship

      a conflict of interest

      a mutual willingness to concede

      to see an agreement as the goal of negotiation

      The aim must be to achieve a common agreement. If a party does not need the other to achieve their goals, there will be no negotiation.

      1.2 How Can

      Enjoying the preview?
      Page 1 of 1