Legal Writing
1st Semester, AY 2017-2018
CONCISENESS
Use both long and short sentences.
Balance is key.
A series of long sentences taxes the
brain and makes remembering
information difficult, while sentences
that are too short sound choppy and
stunted.
Sentences that are 30 words or more can
lead to confusion and a lack of clarity.
It is always better to split long sentences
into two or more chunks, or you can
create a list to convey this information in
a clear manner.
A numbered or bulleted list uses fewer
words and emphasizes the ideas that are
enumerated.
Judge Debbie Dulay Del Val
10/2/2017
“The basic rule is this: The more
complicated your information is, the
shorter your sentences should be. Legal
data are frequently complex, so the least
you can do for readers is to shorten your
sentences and make the information
easier to absorb.”
– Steven D. Stark, Writing to Win: The
Legal Writer
Try to see where you can cut long
sentences into two. Varying the length of
sentences makes for lively reading.
The ideal sentence length is somewhere
between 15 and 20 words. Note that this
is an average; not every sentence requires
15 to 20 words.
Delete unnecessary words and phrases.
 Delete words and ideas whose meaning
your reader can infer from other words.
Avoid the obvious.
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Legal Writing 10/2/2017
1st Semester, AY 2017-2018

No need to put The subject Delete the phrase Instead of:

the quotation person of this hereinafter
marks referred to as the Reyes claims that the complainant has not
case is Ms. adduced any evidence to prove the
defendant.
Rosario allegation that he is responsible for “using,
Fuentes depicting and vandalizing religious images
(hereinafter and icons.’’
referred to as
the “defendant
Consider:
Fuentes”). Reyes claims that complainant has not
proven that Reyes has used, depicted and
vandalized religious images and icons.

Instead of: The words in parentheses may be omitted.

These words either explain the obvious or provide
Based on the foregoing, it is evident that excessive detail.
there is no sufficient evidence to sustain (advance) warning ask (a question) (but) nevertheless
the case due to the following reasons: alongside (of) (as to) whether (essential) element
(and) moreover emergency (situation) (specific) example
Consider:
(a distance of) twenty (empty) space (close) scrutiny
Clearly, the case cannot prosper feet
belief (system) estimated (roughly) at
because: (a period of) six months
(end) result (false) pretenses
(as) for example
(but) however few (in number)
(absolutely) clear
eradicate (completely) consensus (of opinion)

(foreign) essentials incident reported (to (actual) (past) records

imports (different) kinds (mass) media the effect experience
crisis (situation) (direct) refer (back) that) (past)
free (of charge) confrontation reflect (back)
daily (basis) (integral) part my (own) never (before) experience
(general) public is (now) pending opinion revert (back) (separate)
healing in (the year) my (personal) risk (factor) entities
(process) 1957 opinion shooting
descend (down) each (and every) never (at any
scrutinize
(carefully) (incident)
(important) each (separate) time)

Judge Debbie Dulay Del Val

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Legal Writing 10/2/2017
1st Semester, AY 2017-2018

Rewrite prepositional phrases:

Get rid of the prepositions and find a strong
active verb to make the sentence direct.
Instead of:
In this passage is an example of the use of the rule of
justice in argumentation.
Consider:
This passage exemplifies argumentation using the
rule of justice.
in this passage = this passage
is an example of = exemplifies
the use of = using
Instead of:
This Court did not err in issuing its order of dismissal of the claims of
plaintiff.
Consider:
The Court did not err in dismissing plaintiff‘s claims. (Note: This
sentence contains double negatives.)
Better:
The Court correctly dismissed plaintiff‘s claims.

Avoid doublets and triplets. Acknowledge and confess

DOUBLES AND SUGGESTED SUBSTITUTES
> acknowledge
Act and deed > act
Annul and set aside > annul
Authorize and empower > authorize
Do not use two or three or four words for Closed and terminated
Conjecture and surmise
>
>
closed
conjecture
one. Do not use many words when one is Covenant and agree
Cover, embrace and include
>
>
agree
include
more understandable. Deem and consider
Due and payable
>
>
consider
due
Each and all > each
Each and every > each
Entirely and completely > entirely
Final and conclusive > final
Fit and proper > proper
Fit and suitable > suitable
For and during > during
For and in consideration of > for
Force and effect > effect
Fraud and deceit > fraud

Start fast—no slow windups. Useless words It is noteworthy that

and phrases weaken your meaning. It must be remembered that
It is generally recognized that
Avoid mechanical phrases such as: It is interesting to note that
My opinion is that It is expected that
The point I wish to make is that It is a known fact that
The fact of the matter is that It is obvious that
It has been observed that It is essential that
It is significant that It is crucial that
It is clear that It is conceivable that

Judge Debbie Dulay Del Val

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Legal Writing
1st Semester, AY 2017-2018
Painter calls these “useless preambles.”
Other writers call them “throat-clearing
expressions.”
While these expressions can add flavor
or emphasis to the language, they are
often unnecessary.
To reduce the word count, try
deleting shall — this is said to be
the “true symbol of legalese.”
Instead of: Each member shall have the right
to sell, give or bequeath all or any part of his
membership interest to any other member
without restriction of any kind.
Consider: Members may sell, give or
bequeath all or any part of their
membership interest to any other member.
The expletive is effective when
attention needs to be diverted
from a person or entity.
For example, instead of writing:
“You erred in computing the figures.”
We can write:
“There was an error in computing the
figures.”
Judge Debbie Dulay Del Val
10/2/2017
Instead of: Consider:
An assiduous examination of the Defendants have acquired wealth
foregoing factual considerations reveals
that defendants have acquired wealth
manifestly out of proportion to their
legitimate income. (12 words)
manifestly out of proportion to their
legitimate income. (22 words)
What was clearly established is the fact
that the information provided for in the
Clearly, Badian did not commit
falsification since the information in the
alleged falsified certification was in fact allegedly falsified certification is the same
the same with the information contained as that in his January 1, 2007 certification.
in the Certification dated 1 January 2007 (25 words)
issued by Subject Badian, giving the
impression that NO falsification as
alleged was committed by the Subject.
(50 words)
Recast “It is” or “There are” starters.
These are called expletive constructions,
wherein the subject comes after the verb.
In many instances, however, the
expletive delays the action.
Instead of:
There were several issues raised at the
conference.
Consider:
Several issues were raised at the
conference.
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Legal Writing 10/2/2017
1st Semester, AY 2017-2018

Attach parenthetical numericals to

spelled-out numbers only if the
number is crucial or a large amount.
Otherwise, this practice only clutters the
reading.
It is, for example, hard to read this
sentence:
“Seven (7) policemen were present when
the three (3) suspects were interrogated
for two (2) days straight.”

Judge Debbie Dulay Del Val

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