Merry Widow Eng

THE MERRY WIDOW
Music by
Franz Lehar
Original German libretto by

Victor Leon & Leon Stein
English Adaptation
by
Richard Leighton
VILLAGE LIGHT OPERA GROUP VERSION

JANUARY 21, 2006
AMORE OPERA VERSION

JANUARY/FEBRUARY 2010
JANUARY 17, 2010 REWRITES
© Richard Leighton 1986/2005/2010
7427 Westlawn Ave.

Los Angeles, CA 90045
310-670-2339
I-1
THE MERRY WIDOW
ACT ONE
(The Petrovedian Embassy, Paris, Evening. At CURTAIN, a party is in progress. NIEJUS directs activities. As
CASCADA sings, BARON ZETA, VALENCIENNE (his wife) enter US, unseen by the guests. CAMILLE is seen
trailing VALENCIENNE.)
CASCADA: MY FRIENDS MAY I HAVE YOUR ATTENTION

I'M PROUD THAT THE DUTY'S MINE
TO THANK OUR HOST,
(BUT I'LL MENTION
THAT SPEECHES ARE NOT MY LINE!)
So, now, WITHOUT FURTHER DIGRESSION

LET OUR SENTIMENT FIND EXPRESSION:
TO OUR HOST, HIS QUEEN AND HIS COUNTRY

ONE THOUSAND YEARS OF HEALTH TO YOU!
ENSEMBLE: TO OUR HOST, HIS QUEEN AND HIS COUNTRY

ONE THOUSAND YEARS OF HEALTH TO YOU!
ZETA: MY DEAREST FRIENDS I CAN ASSURE YOU

YOUR WORDS COULD NOT HAVE MOVED ME MORE
BOTH AS A MAN WHO LOVES HIS COUNTRY
AND AS ITS PROUD AMBASSADOR.
THIS EVENING'S PARTY, I'LL REMIND YOU,

IS NOT FOR GAIETY ALONE.
IT BEARS MORE SIGNIFICANT MEANING
AND PATRIOTIC OVERTONE.
WE CELEBRATE MY SOVERIGN'S BIRTHDAY;

OUR LOVE AND HONOR WE DECREE,
WITHIN THIS EMBASSY THAT STANDS FOR
PETROVEDIA IN PARIS!
ENSEMBLE: WE CELEBRATE YOUR SOVEREIGN'S BIRTHDAY;

OUR LOVE AND HONOR WE DECREE,
WITHIN THIS EMBASSY THAT STANDS FOR
PETROVEDIA IN PARIS!
(ALL toast and merrily disperse, as BARON ZETA takes VALENCIENNE aside)
I-2
MAJOR-DOMO: (announcing arrival): Lord and Lady Montague Mastiff of Devonshire!
(Lord and Lady [MATILDA] Mastiff enter and greet ZETA and VALENCIENNE. MONTAGUE is doddering,
ancient—MATILDA is young, rosey and Reubenesque. CASCADA comes up behind MATILDA, whispers in her
ear, and MATILDA giggles.)
MONTAGUE: Did I do something funny, m’dear?
MATILDA: Oh, no, dear…It’s--the champagne…I think it’s just gotten to my head--
MONTAGUE: But you haven’t had any yet….
(A SERVANT sweeps by carrying a tray of filled champagne glasses. MATILDA grabs one
and shows it to MONTAGUE. MATILDA and CASCADA exchange glances, and MATILDA
quickly downs the champagne in one shot and she and her husband disappear into the party)
ZETA
(to VALENCIENNE:) Now, my gooseberry, you know your assignment:
keep Chevalier Rosillion occupied, and far away from the widow when she arrives--
VALENCIENNE
But, my party, creampuff—
ZETA
Niejus and I shall attend to the guests, sugarplum. In this time of crisis we all have our duties to perform, hmm?
Now, run along, there's a good girl--
(VALENCIENNE leaves and joins CAMILLE, who proceeds to kiss her hand and fawn over her. ZETA and
VALENCIENNE exchange glances, ZETA approving, VALENCIENNE despairing)
MAJOR-DOMO: General and Madame Lars Gustaffson of Helsinki!
(GENERAL LARS GUSTAFFSON and his wife, GERTA are greeted by ZETA. LARS is very elderly, but tall
and straight-backed—GERTA is a young and statuesque Brunhilde. ST. BRIOCHE approaches GERTA, and
she purposefully drops her handkerchief. ST. BRIOCHE picks it up and presents it to her—his face barely
comes above her bosom. Entranced, he kisses her hand, then snaps to attention and salutes LARS.)
GERTA: (to ST. BRIOCHE) Merci, Monsieur! Vous ete tres charmant! (to LARS) Isn’t he charming,
dearest?
LARS: Hmm. Not to be repetitive, but I find him excessively…French…
(LARS and GERTA blend into the party. GERTA blows a quick kiss to ST. BRIOCHE, who “catches” it and
presses it to his heart with bravado).
I-2a
ZETA
Niejus!
NIEJUS
Yes, Excellency!
ZETA
We approaching "zero hour," Niejus. The widow should be here any moment.
You know what you must do? Your prime directive?
NIEJUS
Yes, Excellency: "Keep the French away from the widow...and her money..."
ZETA
Shhh! Yes, exactly! And tactfully, Niejus, tactfully. Our alliance with
France is very important to us in these troubled times--
NIEJUS
Baron! I see that your wife is...doing her part...in maintaining alliances with the French...
ZETA
Hmmm? Oh, yes, just so, Niejus! Just look at how she's keeping that handsome young devil occupied. Ah,
what a soldier!!! Valencienne is the apple of my eye, the light of my life!
NIEJUS
Er...yes, Excellency.
MAJOR-DOMO: Count and Countess Camembert of Normandy!
(COUNT JULES CAMEMBERT and his wife, COUNTESS FLORA CAMEMBERT, enter and greet ZETA.
JULES is a slight, spry 80-year-old—FLORA is a buxom and earthy former showgirl. As before, CASCADA
approaches FLORA from behind and whispers in her ear. FLORA laughs, then indicates for him to repeat it in
her ear. She laughs again, then whispers in JULES’ ear. He laughs, and they both point at CASCADA and
laugh. CASCADA blushes and retreats)
JULES: Does he really think you would do that?
FLORA: Chou-Chou, have you forgotten that summer on Lake Como? The rowboat?
JULES: Eh? Oh!…oh, yes indeed!!
(JULES and FLORA laugh and retreat into the party. VALENCIENNE manages to break free from the
embraces of CAMILLE and hurries back to ZETA's side)
ZETA
And here she comes! (to VALENCIENNE:) Well, little general, how go the maneuvers, hmmm?
(CASCADA, ST. BRIOCHE and the other FRENCHMEN start to mill about, closing in on ZETA and NIEJUS)
I-3
VALENCIENNE
Er...very well, I think, dearest.
ZETA
Excellent!! Just keep Rosillion occupied for a little longer, my dumpling. Madame Glawari should be here
soon--
CASCADA
Did I hear you say " Madame Glawari," Baron?
ST. BRIOCHE
Yes, see here, Baron Zeta, where is she? You promised she'd come. I mean, birthday cake and champagne are
fine, but...I want to meet the most radiant and witty widow in Paris!
CASCADA
To say nothing of the richest!!
ZETA
She will be here soon, I assure you--
VALENCIENNE
Have no fear, gentlemen. The Widow Glawari will arrive,
as promised, before this party takes full flight.
(The orchestra is heard playing ballroom music from within)
CASCADA
Ooh-la-la, just think! The widow of Petrovedia's richest banker, and beautiful to boot!
ST. BRIOCHE
I wonder what she's worth--exactly? What was in his will?
CASCADA
Some say he left 10, other's 50-- But, I have it on the very best
authority that the sum is just over 20 million...pounds...sterling!
ZETA
How did you know that???
CASCADA
Pas de tout, cher Baron Zeta; you know that in matters
of gathering intelligence, we French are unsurpassed!
I-4
NIEJUS
[under his breath] Tell that to Napoleon!
CASCADA
Pardon, monsieur?
ZETA
Oh, nothing!...he just said that...it's a shame you're not Tyrolean.
ST. BRIOCHE
Twenty..million...pounds! Where does one keep so much money?
ZETA
In a safe place, have no fear--
CASCADA
Yes, yes, all tucked away in vault #7 of the Petrovedian National Bank...we know that!
ZETA
Yes...er, quite so...an impregnable fortress!--
CASCADA
To frontal assault, perhaps, Baron. But far from impregnable to a strategy of the heart--
ZETA
Of the heart?? Oh, yes....of course...please excuse me, Viscompte...(to VALENCIENNE:) Quickly, sweetpea,
get the Chevalier back to the party...I don't want him to hear this--
VALENCIENNE
But, kumquat, as hostess I have other duties to attend to--
ZETA
None, cherry blossom, as important as this you now perform!
Please, be a good little soldier and do it for the Fatherland!
VALENCIENNE
Well, if you put it that way, plumcake--
ZETA
I do, my tartlet. (to CAMILLE:) So, then, Chevalier, and you, too, gentlemen...won't you sample some of our
superb Petrovedian cuisine? All washed down with the finest French champagne, of
course--
CAMILLE
Any meal served by the Baroness is food fit for the gods--
I-5
ZETA
I'm so glad you think so. Yes. Well then, you two just...run along and enjoy yourselves, hm?
CAMILLE
Thank you, Baron, we will!
(He sweeps away with VALENCIENNE)
ZETA
So, Viscompte Cascada, please continue....about the strategy of the heart??
CASCADA
Oui, v'raiment! There is not a female heart that beats that cannot be conquered by a Frenchman, n'est ce pas?
And the man who conquers the Widow Glawari's heart holds the key to the Petrovedian economy.
(Beat)
I mean, naturalment, her husband would get full control of her fortune, which is as it should be, of course!
ST. BRIOCHE
I'm not so sure, Cascada. The strategy may be sound, but there are those who say that it would be easier to
storm the Bastille than to scale the walls of the Widow Glawari's heart--
CASCADA
Hmm. An impossible mission for the infantry, perhaps, St. Brioche,
but it should not prove too difficult for an officer of the cavalry--
ST. BRIOCHE
Pooh, monsieur. We are not speaking of your usual romantic pursuits, Cascada.
This is not some chubby, swooning wife of an English industrialist here on holiday--
CASCADA
Nor is she one of your usual tarts from the Montparnasse, St. Brioche!
ST. BRIOCHE
Nor some ninny from Normandy, Viscompte!
CASCADA
Nor some floozie from Finlandia, Marquis!
ST. BRIOCHE
Saddlesore simpleton!!!
CASCADA
Flatfooted fop!!!
ZETA
Gentlemen, please!--
NIEJUS
Let them kill each other!!
I-6
ZETA
This is a festive occasion, gentlemen. So, please, leave this for now
and go inside with the rest of our guests. It's time to cut the cake--
ST. BRIOCHE
But, see here, what about the widow?
FRENCHMEN
Yes, what about Madame Glawari? etc.
ZETA
Niejus will announce her as soon as she arrives, never fear! So, please, let us repair inside!
CASCADA
After you, monsieur Marquis!
ST. BRIOCHE
After you, monsieur Viscompte!
CASCADA
Very well.
(He exits, followed by the others. NIEJUS and ZETA trail behind)
ZETA
At all costs, we must keep these men away from Madame Glawari and, more importantly, from her money!!!
That 20 million is all that stands between Petrovedia's sovereignty and her being gobbled up by the hungry
monsters on her borders. Do you understand, Niejus???
NEIJUS
Yes, Excellency!
ZETA
It is our solemn duty to see that these Frenchmen do not get that money in their grasp!!! (Reading the motto on
the Petrovedian Flag:) "ILLEGITIMI NON CARBORUNDUM," Niejus! Yes...come along now...
(As they exit, CAMILLE and VALENCIENNE enter)

I-7
DUET VALENCIENNE / CAMILLE
VALENCIENNE: NOW LISTEN PLEASE, WHILE NO ONE'S NEAR
CAMILLE: THERE'S NO ONE'S VOICE I'D RATHER HEAR
VAL: THERE'S SOMETHING THAT I HAVE TO TELL YOU
CAM.: THERE'S SOMETHING THAT I HAVE TO TELL YOU, TOO
VAL.: BE STILL! YOU KNOW I WILL NOT HEAR SUCH WORDS

FROM YOU!
CAM.: WHETHER I SPEAK OR NOT YOU CAN HEAR

THE WORDS RESOUNDING IN MY HEART, MY DEAR!
VAL.: OH, PLEASE, CAMILLE!

IT'S THIS I HAVE DREADED!
IT'S TIME THIS WAS ENDED!
CAM.: WAS ENDED?
VAL.: I WANT YCU TO MARRY.
CAM. TO MARRY? ME?
WHOM SHOULD I WED, WHEN ALL THAT I AM

IS YOURS ALONE?
VAL: OH, WILL YOU BE STILL?

I CANNOT AND I WILL NOT HEAR SUCH WORDS!
I AM A RESPECTABLE WIFE,
MY HUSBAND IS LORD OF MY LIFE.
OUR VOW IS TCO PRECIOUS A TREASURE
TO WAGER AWAY ON ADVENTURE.
YOU'VE TREATED THIS ALL LIKE A GAME,
BUT I RISK MY HOME AND MY NAME.
SO, PLEASE, SAVE ME ANGUISH AND STRIFE.
I AM A RESPECTABLE WIFE!
THERE'S NO WAY OF WINNING.

MISFORTUNE PURSUES US.
THIS PASSION MUST DIE NOW
BEFORE IT CONSUMES US.
I-8
VAL: (cont.) BEWARE, MY FRIEND;

TAKE CARE, MY FRIEND,
IT'S DANGEROUS TO PLAY WITH FIRE.
THE FLAME YOU'VE FANNED
GETS OUT OF HAND,
AND CONSEQUENCES MAY BE DIRE.
IT'S ROMANTIC TO BE UNCONCERNED,
BUT THIS YOU SHOULD BY NOW HAVE LEARNED:
A SIMPLE RULE
"WHO PLAYS WITH FIRE WILL GET BURNED!"
CAM: YES, YOU'RE A RESPECTABLE WIFE,

I VOUCHSAFE FOR THAT, ON MY LIFE!
BUT NO MATTER THE SCORN I AM GIVEN
I'LL FOLLOW YOU NOW--
I AM DRIVEN!
MY HEART'S VOICE WILL NOT BE DENIED

IT CALLS TO YOUR HEART, DEEP INSIDE.
BUT STILL FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE,
YOU'LL STAY A RESPECTABLE WIFE.
I KNOW ALL THE DANGERS

I DON'T CARE, I'LL BRAVE THEM!
THESE FEELINGS ARE PRECIOUS!
I MUST FIGHT TO SAVE THEM!
VALENCIENNE: CAMILLE:
BEWARE, MY FRIEND, I'LL DARE, MY FRIEND.

TAKE CARE MY FRIEND IT'S GOOD ADVICE,
IT'S SUICIDE TO PLAY
WITH FIRE! BUT NOT WHAT I REQUIRE
THE FLAME YOU'VE
FANNED PLEASE UNDERSTAND
GETS OUT OF HAND, THIS FLAME YOU'VE FANNED
AND EVERYONE'S BURNED
AT THE PYRE. BECAME A RAGING FIRE.
IT'S ROMANTIC TO BE
UNCONCERNED DEAR, YOU MUST BELIEVE
BUT ONE THING YOU
AND I HAVE LEARNED
THAT I HAVE LEARNED
AND I DON'T CARE!
DON'T BE A FOOL, I AM A FOOL
YOU KNOW THE RULE: AND FOOL'S RUSH IN
"WHO PLAYS WITH FIRE TO PLAY WITH FIRE
WILL GET BURNED!" AND GET BURNED!
I-9
(As VALENCIENNE and CAMILLE exit, ZETA and NIEJUS enter. VALENCIENNE entreats ZETA with her
eyes, but ZETA simply smiles and waves approvingly.)
ZETA
Oh, Niejus!
NIEJUS
Yes, Excellency?
ZETA
I'm so worried!
NIEJUS
Hmmm. Yes, I expect you are, sir. Baron, can we speak man to man?
ZETA
Of course, Niejus. About what?
NIEJUS
It's about your wife, sir.
ZETA
The Baroness? What about her, Niejus?
NIEJUS
This business with Chevalier Rossillion, sir--
ZETA
Oh, that! Yes, clever, isn't it, Niejus? How she maneuvers him, keeps him close at all times. And how she tells
me everything that goes on--reports all his secret desires, his innermost passions--
NIEJUS
Let me see if I've got this right: she tells you everything?
ZETA
Everything!
NIEJUS
Baron, with all due respect, I think that this assignment in Paris is ruining your character! Your Excellency, sir,
I am shocked that you are so pleased with your wife's conduct!
ZETA
For heaven's sake why shouldn't I be? She is performing exemplary service
on a mission of utmost importance to Queen and country, I'll have you know!
NIEJUS
You mean that this...assignation...with Rossillion is an official mission in Her Majesty's service?
ZETA
Of course!
I-10
NIEJUS
Oh. (aside) Why don't I ever get those kind of assignments? (to ZETA:) Then tell me, sir: why did you say you
were worried?
ZETA
Because I am worried, Niejus!! About Madame Glawari!!!
NIEJUS
Oh, Madame Glawari!!!
FRENCHMEN
(Hearing NIEJUS exclaim, they hungrily appear:) Where is she? Is she here? etc.
ZETA
No, not yet!
(THE FRENCHMEN disappointedly exit)
ZETA
You see, Niejus? I can't keep the wolves at bay forever. Thank God Valencienne is keeping Rossillon busy. He
is by far the most dangerous one...Valencienne says that there is no need for concern, that he is infatuated with
some married woman-
NIEJUS
Oh, really? What a surprise--
ZETA
--but I am not convinced. He still worries me. Boors and braggarts like Cascada and St. Brioche are one thing,
but this young Dionysus is something else again-
NIEJUS
He certainly is--
ZETA
Oh, where is Count Danilovitch when I need him?? Here Petrovedia stands in peril, ringed by the enemy, and
her military attache is not here! Where could he be?? I told him to be here before her arrival!
NIEJUS
Whose arrival, sir?
ZETA
(frantically:) Madame Glawari!!!
(THE FRENCHMEN appear as before. NIEJUS and ZETA shake their heads to indicate that she has not
arrived. THE FRENCHMEN exit.)
I-11
ZETA (continued):
Danilovitch is our only hope, the only Petrovedian dashing and clever enough to hold Hanna Glawari's
attention. Are you sure he wasn't at home?
(NIEJUS nods head.)
Did you try his mistress?
(NIEJUS nods.)
All of them?
(NIEJUS nods.)
So he has deserted us. Disappeared!
(NIEJUS shakes head. ZETA looks at him, tries to follow the meaning of the various shakes and nods, gets
exasperated and blurts out:)
What's that supposed to mean???
NIEJUS
I'm sorry, Excellency. Count Danilovitch is at Maxim's, sir--
ZETA
Maxim's????
NIEJUS
--or, at least, he was seen there 48 hours ago, occupied in some serious revelry with the Grisettes--
ZETA
The Grisettes???????
NIEJUS
(with ZETA:) --Grisettes...yessir...showgirls, sir....and from the looks of it
they were trying to give new meaning to the word "party," sir--
ZETA
Oh, Danilovitch, how could you do this to your country? To your Queen? To me???
NIEJUS
Never fear, sir. Count Danilovitch is a true patriot,
Petrovedia's greatest military hero. He will arrive in time--
(a MAID appears and hands NIEJUS a calling card. The MAID exits)
(reading the card) --Then again, perhaps not--
ZETA
What do you mean by that?
NIEJUS
(softly) Madame Glawari is here.
I-12
ZETA
What was that??
NIEJUS: (slightly louder)

Madame Glawari is here…
ZETA:
For God’s Sake, man, speak up!!!
MAJOR DOMO:
Madame Hanna Glawari of Petrovedia!
(A massive stampede of FRENCHMEN ensues. They rush towards the main entrance of the embassy.
MONTAGUE and MATILDA, LARS and GERTA, JULES and FLORA appear to view the events.)
GERTA:
At last!
FLORA:
Yes…let’s see what all the fuss is about, shall we?
MATILDA:
Oooh! Isn’t this fun??
(GERTA and FLORA glare at MATILDA in disbelief of her benign attitude)
NIEJUS
Oh, my...!
ZETA
Our goose is cooked, Niejus. Danilovitch must get here, and quickly.
Petrovedia stands on the brink of disaster, and I hold him personally responsible!!!
(HANNA GLAWARI enters, followed by a mob of FRENCHMEN)

I-13
THE ENTRANCE OF HANNA, THE MERRY WIDOW
HANNA: GENTLEMEN, I PRAY--

CASCADA: WE CANNOT TEAR OURSELVES AWAY!!
HANNA: WHAT EXQUISITE PRAISE!
ST. BRIOCHE: SETTING US ABLAZE!
HANNA: PLEASE STOP IT NOW,
CASCADA: THE BRIGHTEST STAR BY FAR YOU ARE--
HANNAH: THAT'S ENOUGH!
ST. BRIOCHE: YOU'RE A VISION!
HANNA: THIS REALLY IS EMBARRASING!
MEN: YOU'RE ABSOLUTELY RAVISHING!
HANNA: YOU GO A BIT TOO FAR!
HANNA: MEN:
BUT POSSIBLY IN HOW RADIANT YOU ARE

PARIS
THIS IS PAR ? DEAR SHINING STAR!
HANNA: I HAVEN'T BEEN HERE LONG ENOUGH

TO KNOW PARISIAN WAYS.
I FEAR I'M NOT YET STRONG ENOUGH
TO BEAR SUCH WEIGHTY PRAISE.
I'M MUCH TOO PETROVEDIAN,
AS ALL OF YOU CAN TELL;
BUT WHEN I'M MORE PARISIENNE,
I'LL BEAR IT VERY WELL!
YOUR CHARMING WORDS MAKE ME FEEL BLESSED,
STILL AND ALL, I MUST CONFESS
I FEAR THAT THEY ARE MEANT
FOR THE MILLIONS I POSSESS!
MEN: OH! OH! OH!
HANNA: OH, COME NOW, WE DIGRESS!

THEY SAY, AS I RECALL,
WIDOWS ARE ALL MUCH IN DEMAND.
AND IF THE POOR THINGS SHOULD BE RICH
THEN THERE'S NO END TO THE SUITORS AT HAND!
HANNA: CASCADA/ ST BRIOCHE: MEN:

AH!-- WHAT A THING TO SAY--- SHE'S RIGHT!
CAN SHE REALLY THINK WORD GETS AROUND
WE'RE SUITORS ABOUND
AFTER HER GOLD? WHEN THERE IS GOLD!
AFFLUENT WIDOWS
DOUBLE IN CHARM
OR SO THE STORY
IS TOLD!
I-14
HANNA: CASCADA / ST.BRIOCHE: MEN:
YOU HAVE A MIND YOU HAVE A MIND THAT

A MAN CAN ADORE. A MAN CAN ADORE.
PLEASE GRACIOUS LADY
TELL US MORE. TELL US MORE.
BACK HOME IN YOU'RE SO YOU'RE SO
PETROVEDIA
THE MEN ARE RATHER
TERSE: CHARMING. CHARMING.
A GIRL MIGHT GET A
SMALL BOUQUET, BEAUTY, COUPLED BEAUTY, COUPLED
PERHAPS A LINE OF WITH WITH
VERSE. WISDOM. WISDOM.
MY COUNTRYMEN
RESPECT A GIRL, HOW DIS- HOW DIS-
MY COUNTRYMEN ARE
WISE. -ARMING! -ARMING!
THEY NEVER WOULD
SUBJECT A GIRL WITTY AND WITTY AND
TO FLATTERY WARM AND WARM AND
AND LIES. WISE! WISE!
ANYONE WHO EVER WE

KNEW YOU, WE WOULD NEVER TRY
WOULD BE ABLE LIE, NEVER
TO SEE TO
THROUGH YOU. LIE,
FLATTER OR
HA-HA! DECIEVE, AH, PLEASE
THIS YOU MUST MADAME YOU MUST
BELIEVE. BELIEVE.
GENTLEMEN, YOU CAN'T
DECIEVE
IT'S IN EVERY CASC: YOU MUSN'T DOUBT
WORD MY VERITY!
YOU EXPRESS! ST. B: I SPEAK IN ALL
SINCERITY!
BOTH: SAY YOU BELIEVE SAY YOU BELIEVE
ME ME
AH, YES! AH, YES! AH, YES!
(the FRENCHMEN adlib and hover around HANNA.

ZETA forces his way through the group of men and rescues HANNA)
I-15
ZETA
Ah, Madame Glawari! What a pleasure!
I suppose there is no need to tell you that you look absolutely ravishing!
HANNA
A woman can never hear enough compliments, dear Baron, especially from someone as trustworthy as yourself.
ZETA
You are most deserving, Madame! You honor us with your presence.
HANNA
Thank you, Baron Zeta! I hope that you -- and all of your guests -- will so honor me, tomorrow, by coming to
my little party. In honor of Queen Myrna’s birthday, I have transformed the gardens of my estate into a
Petrovedian wonderland, a little bit of home. So, you will come...all of you. Please?
ZETA
Oh, yes, yes! A little bit of home sounds so attractive, Madame Glawari. To surround yourself, as it were, with
the culture and customs of your homeland must be such a comfort for you, as a foreigner here on French soil--
HANNA
Hmm? I hadn't really thought about that... It's been great fun, at all events--
ZETA
And, speaking of things safe and familiar....I knew you would be more comfortable tonight if you were escorted
by one of your countrymen, so I have invited Count Danilovitch to have that honor--
HANNA
Oh, him??!! Have you, now? And where is he, pray tell?
ZETA
He is...on diplomatic assignment at the moment...something to do with...
French secret weapons...very hush-hush. But never fear, he'll be along momentarily--
HANNA
No matter. My taste in escorts has become more--international--now, at all events, Baron.
ZETA
But, Madame--
HANNA
Variety is the spice of life, Baron! Living these past few months here in Paris has taught me that, and much
more--
ZETA
But, Madame--
HANNA
Besides, men are all the same, n'est ce pas? With the exception of you, of course, cher Baron Zeta! Oh, what
a lucky woman the Baroness is.
I-16
ZETA
You are most kind, Madame--
HANNA
But, since you are taken, I will have to console myself with some of these gallant and arduous gentlemen in
which Paris abounds!
ZETA
But, Madame--
HANNA
And, so many of them seem to have taken the care to come early to your party, haven't they, Baron Zeta? So, if
you'll excuse me--
(HANNA haughtily enters the party, followed by hordes of fawning FRENCHMEN)
ZETA
This is terrible!!! Mark my words, Danilovitch, wherever you are, I'll have your hide for this!!!!
(ZETA quickly follows HANNA into the party)
DANILO
(offstage:) All right, Niejus....all right!!! Never fear. Petrovedia calls, and Count Danilo Danilovitch of the
Royal Hussars is here..
(DANILO enters, carried on a chair with poles like an ancient monarch by the GRISETTES. He is obviously
drunk, and somewhat disheveled from a bout of debauchery.)
By the way...where am I, Niejus?
NIEJUS
Oh, good Lord!!!
(The GRISETTES giggle and lower DANILO to the ground as the music begins)
I-17
DANILO:
OH FATHERLAND THE THINGS I DO

TO MAKE THIS PLANET SAFE FOR YOU
YOU CALL, NO MATTER WHERE I'M AT,
BECAUSE I AM YOUR DIPLOMAT.
YOU BECKON ME FROM DUSK TILL DAWN.

AND, SOMETIMES, EVEN LATER ON.
YOU CALL ME OUT OF BED AT THREE,
NO MATTER WHO'S IN THERE WITH ME.
I'M ALWAYS RUSHING TO AND FRO,

THERE'S ALWAYS SOMEPLACE ELSE TO GO,
PROTECTING YOU FROM ENEMIES,
BOTH ON THE LAND AND ON THE SEAS!
I'LL FIGHT WHOMEVER YOU MAY SAY!
WE SOLDIERS OUGHT TO BE THAT WAY.
I ALWAYS WIN, (BUT I DECLINE
TO SAY I'VE WON MY WAR WITH WINE.)
REGRETTABLY, WE'RE NOW AT PEACE:

OH, WILL THIS BOREDOM NEVER CEASE?
NO WONDER, AFTER SUCH A DAY,
I CHOOSE TO SPEND MY NIGHTS AT PLAY!
YOU'LL FIND ME AT MAXIM'S

WHERE PLEASURE BRIGHTLY GLEAMS
WITH GIRLS IN THIS OASIS
I'M ON A FIRST-NAME BASIS:
LOLO, DODO, JOUJOU,
CLOCLO, MARGOT, FROUFROU-
THEY HELP ME TO FORGET YOU,
BELOVED FATHERLAND!
WITH BUCKETS OF CHAMPAGNE

I RESURRECT MY BRAIN,
WHILE TRADING HUGS AND KISSES
WITH ALL THOSE PRETTY MISSES:
LOLO, DODO, JOUJOU,
CLOCLO, MARGOT, FROUFROU-
THEY HELP ME TO FORGET YOU,
BELOVED FATHERLAND!
(The GRISETTES leave giggling, as DANILO collapses in a heap, supported by NIEJUS)

I-18
DANILO
All right, Niejus, where are they? Where's the enemy? Where's my sword?
(Beat)
Where's my foot?
NIEJUS
Right under you, sir...where you'll usually find it when it's not in your mouth! Oh, good Lord, Count
Danilovitch, try to stand up!!
DANILO
I thought I was standing. Niejus, dear chap, do you suppose I could take a little nap?
NIEJUS
But, Count--
DANILO
Just a teensy, little nap, Niejus...I haven't slept in...(looks at his watch)...two days.
Just close my eyes for a moment--
NIEJUS
But, Count--
DANILO
(pointing to the palm tree planter in the midst of the settee:) Now, that looks comfortable--
NIEJUS
Oh, very well, if you insist--
DANILO
I do. That's a good fellow. Now, why don't you run along and tell the Baron to relax...everything's all right
now..I'm here...and as soon as I get a few winks, I'll be as right as rain...yesssirrr...right as....(humming:) LOLO,
CLOCLO, JOUJOU, MARGOT, DODO, FROUfffzzzzzzzzzzz---zzzzzzzzzzzz
NIEJUS
Oh, no! Count Danilovitch, wake up! Count Danilovitch!!!
(FLORA, MATILDA AND GERTA ENTER WITHOUT THEIR HUSBANDS. THEY ARE FUMING)
FLORA: Of all the nerve!
GERTA: Ever since she’s arrived, those gigolos have paid no attention to us at all!
MATILDA: Oh, but I think she’s ever so nice!
(FLORA and GERTA scowl at MATILDA, who shrinks under their gaze)
(HANNA enters from the party, still pursued by the FRENCHMEN)

I-18a
HANNA
Please, gentlemen! I must get some air!!
ST. BRIOCHE
Yes, of course. (to CASCADA:) Stand back, monsieur!
CASCADA
No, you stand back, monsieur!
FRENCHMEN (arguing amongst themselves:)

Yes, get back! You get back! No, you! You!!! etc.
HANNA
Really, gentlemen, please!!!! The other ladies here are growing angry with me for occupying so much of your
time and attention. Please, I appeal to your chivalry as officers and gentlemen!
CASCADA
Ah, yes, well, that's different. Of course, Madame!
ST. BRIOCHE
An appeal to an infantryman's honor will never fail you, Madame!
CASCADA
And that is pale in comparison to the honor of the cavalry, Madame!
ST. BRIOCHE
The infantry is the spine of French honor, monsieur!
CASCADA
Upon which the cavalryman triumphantly sits, monsieur!!
(General pandemonium. Other FRENCHMEN chime in:)
FRENCHMEN (overlapping/adlib):
The Navy is the standard of honor--
As a member of French parliament, I must object--
I am a captain in the Grenadiers, and I say--
My family goes back to Charlemagne, and I assure you--
I-19
HANNA
Please stop this, gentlemen!!!! That's better. You are all the most honorable
men in Paris--and therefore the world--and as such I beseech you to
share your...potent presences...with the other ladies here at this party.
(HANNA presents ST. BRIOCHE to GERTA:)
Please?
(beat)
(HANNA presents CASCADA to FLORA, who simply laughs and scorns his attention.
JULES enters, and FLORA goes to him, whispers in his ear, they both point at CASCADA
and laugh and exit. CASCADA embarrassedly shrugs.)
At once!!!
(beat)
(HANNA sees the shy MATILDA, and presents CASCADA to her as an escort. MATILDA is delighted.)
For me?
FRENCHMEN
Oh, certainly. Right away. etc. (CASCADA, ST. BRIOCHE, THE WOMEN and FRENCHMEN exit)
HANNA
Thank God!!! (beat) Do I hear I someone snoring?
(NIEJUS tries to cover by pretending that his sinuses are blocked, but HANNA
pursues the sound until she discovers the sleeping DANILO on the settee)
NIEJUS
Err...yes, Madame. It is Count Danilovitch--
HANNA
Hmm. Exhausted from his...diplomatic exploits, no doubt.
NIEJUS
One could say that, yes, Madame. I will wake him--
I-20
HANNA
No, don't. Leave him to me, Niejus, I will watch over him. Just please see to it that those other gentlemen are
occupied for a while. Please, Niejus, I need a rest!
NIEJUS
Of course, Madame Glawari. I can see why they all fall in love with you.
You could charm the fur off of a Russian bear, Madame!
HANNA
You're sweet, Niejus, thank you. (in Hungarian:) Viszontlatasra, Niejus!
NIEJUS
Ah, yes indeed! (Hungarian:) Szervus, Madame Glawari!
(NIEJUS exits)
HANNA
(examining DANILO:) How curious. I've always wondered what he would look like asleep. Hmm. Hmmmm.
So tired! Of course, now that he's older he can't keep up, poor dear!
(She tickles him with her feather fan, leaving it under DANILO's nose as he breathes.)
DANILO
Ahhhhhhh--CHOO! What the--? (He is frightened by the furry fan on his face)
AAGH!! By all the saints and holy relics-- (he sees HANNA laughing at him:)
Oh, Hanna??!! That is you, isn't it? Yes, it is! Hanna!!! What a pleasant surprise--
HANNA
You weren't expecting to see me, then?
DANILO
Errr, no. Should I have, Hanna?
HANNA
I see you haven't changed, Danilo!
DANILO
Why, thank you, Hanna! How nice of you to say so...but to be truthful, I suppose I am a little grayer now...just
around the temples...and I have put on a few pounds--
HANNA
Yes, quite. But no substantial changes. Tell me,
why are you so late for Queen Myrna’s birthday party?
DANILO
Is there a party, then?
HANNA
Yes.
I-21
DANILO
And I'm late for it?
HANNA
Very.
DANILO
Right. Well, then, I'd better go in.
(DANILO starts to go inside)
HANNA
Count Danilo! Aren't you forgetting something?
DANILO
Am I?
HANNA
Yes!
DANILO
I am? Oh, yes, I am...forgive me, Hanna. May I escort you? My arm, Madame.
(She refuses to take his arm) Hanna?
HANNA
No, I don't think so. I'll just stay out here for a while.
DANILO
Oh? Well, then-- Perhaps I should stay with you? Hmm?
HANNA
You are under no obligation to do so, Count.
DANILO
I know that! Oh, for heaven's sake, Hanna--
HANNA
Don't call me that! You lost the privilege of such familiarity
when you broke our engagement, Count Danilovitch!
DANILO
But that wasn't my fault--!!
HANNA
Oh, of course not, I forgot! Your uncle forbade you to marry me, because I was a commoner, and you simply
acquiesced and broke a young girl's heart in the process! Not your fault, indeed!!
DANILO
Now wait one minute, Madame Glawari, what about you?? Before I even had so much as a chance to explain,
you ran off and set up house with that decrepit, glorified bank teller--
I-22
HANNA
How dare you speak of my late husband in that way, Count Danilovitch!!!??
DANILO
I'm sorry. Please forgive me, Madame. (Beat)
It's all in the past, done and over with. We're both older now --
HANNA
Speak for yourself.
DANILO
You've married well, and have been widowed. I've been around the world--several times-- Let's let bygones be
bygones, hm? Besides, I hear that you are the toast of Parisian society now, much in demand and pursued by
admirers--
HANNA
Ah, Count Danilovitch--
HANNA: DANILO:
YES, WHAT?
YOU MEN ARE
ALL THE SAME I SEE.
WE WOMEN ARE
TO BLAME BUT WHY?
WE LET YOU TRAP
US WITH
A PROMISE
OF ROMANCE. YOU SAY
ANOTHER BROKEN
HEART WE LIE;
YOU KNOW IT
FROM THE START NOT I!
AND WE SHOULD
SEE IT AT A
GLANCE!
THERE ARE EXCEPTIONS
I'M SURE YOU WILL AGREE.
IF THAT IS TRUE
THEY HAVE
NOT APPEARED
TO ME.
YOU CAN BELIEVE THIS:
NO MATTER WHAT YOU DO,
YOU'LL NEVER HEAR ME SAY
THAT I LOVE YOU!
I-23
HANNA:
THERE WAS A BOY

IN PETROVEDIA
WHO PROMISED ME
ETERNAL LOVE.
HE DISAPPEARED NOT
SAYING A WORD--
YOU WERE THAT BOY,
OR HAVEN'T YOU HEARD?
NOW LOOK AT YOU:
A LITTLE OLDER,
BUT NONE THE WISER,
I SHOULD SAY!
AND AS FOR ME,
AGAIN I'M FREE--
AND WONDERING WHY
YOU'RE HERE TODAY?
I-24
HANNA: DANILO:
HOW SWEET!
MY POPULARITY
AH, YES!
HAS GROWN AS
YOU CAN SEE
BUT WHY?
BECAUSE MY BANK
ACCOUNT IS
BURSTING AT
THE SEAMS!
IT IS??
SO MANY SUITORS
CALL
NOT I!!
I COULD NOT
LIST THEM ALL.
AND NOW
I AM THE WOMAN YOU ARE THE WOMAN
OF THEIR DREAMS. OF THEIR DREAMS.
YOU CAN BE SURE YOU

WILL NEVER HEAR FROM ME!
THAT MAY BE SO,
WE'LL JUST
HAVE TO WAIT
AND SEE!
MY DEAR, I'LL PROVE IT:
NO MATTER WHAT YOU DO,
YOU'LL NEVER HEAR ME SAY
THAT I LOVE YOU!
I'LL HEAR YOU

SAYING I'M NEVER SAYING
THAT I LOVE YOU! THAT I LOVE YOU!
(HANNA exits, leaving DANILO outside. ZETA enters)

I-25
ZETA
There you are, at last, Danilo! Did you speak to Madame Glawari?
DANILO
It was unavoidable, Excellency!
ZETA
Er..good! Listen, I have a mission of the utmost importance for you--!
DANILO
As long as it doesn't involve work, Excellency!
ZETA
Yes...er...no!!! Listen to me, Count Danilovitch, none of your foolishness!
I am speaking to you now as the Voice of Petrovedia!
DANILO
Oh, that's different! At your service, Excellency!
ZETA
That's better. Listen, here is your assignment: you are to marry at once--
DANILO
What?? Wait a minute-- Marry? Oh, please, Baron...no! Not me!!
ZETA
Yes, you, and at once!!! It is of the most vital importance to the future of Petrovedia, do you hear? There are
millions and millions...our entire national economy...at stake!
DANILO
Oh, good Lord! Millions and millions?
ZETA
Twenty, to be exact!
DANILO
And which one of the canines in the royal kennels of
Europe wears so many jewels in her collar?
ZETA
What? Which one of who? No "royal canine," you fool!
You are to marry Madame Glawari!
DANILO
Oh, that's differ-- WHAT??
Oh, no, no, NO! Not me! Never! I couldn't!!!
ZETA
Oh, yes you can! And you will!!!
I-26
DANILO
But, Baron--!
ZETA
But nothing! She must not marry a Frenchman!!! That twenty million
must not leave our royal coffers, or Petrovedia will perish!
DANILO
Excellency, I would walk through fire...I'd fight the Austrians barehanded--on foot--but I cannot marry that
woman!!! Listen, if I see to it that she doesn't marry a Frenchman, can I be excused from--
ZETA
A momentary solution will not do! That money must never leave our national bank!
DANILO
But the Queen can't ask for such a sacrifice!
ZETA
She can, she does, and you will marry the Widow Glawari!
(Cries of "Ladies' Choice" are heard from within)
Perfect! This dance is the "Ladies' Choice"!

You shall see to it that Madame Glawari chooses you!
(HANNA and the FRENCHMEN hurriedly enter. ZETA withdraws)

I-27
FINALE ACT ONE
MEN: LADIES' CHOICE! WILL I BE MY LADY'S CHOICE?

DO YOU SEE HOW THRILLED I AM
TO THINK MADAME WILL DANCE WITH ME?
MADAME PLEASE TAKE A CHANCE
AND LET ME HAVE THIS DANCE.
MADAME WILL MAKE MY HEART REJOICE
IF I COULD BE HER CHOICE!
HANNA: GENTLEMEN, THOUGH I KNOW THE CHOICE IS MINE,

BELIEVE ME
CHOOSING ONE AND TURNING DOWN THE REST
WILL SURELY GRIEVE ME.
I HAD BEST SIT OUT THIS DANCE
GIVE THE OTHER GIRLS A CHANCE.
THERE ARE LADIES HERE IN PLENTY!
DANILO: NOT WITH MILLIONS, NAMELY TWENTY!
MEN: JUST A DANCE! ONLY ONE!

CHOOSE THE LUCKY MAN!
DANILO: DAMN! HOW THESE VULTURES PERSERVERE!

BUT I'LL MAKE THEM DISAPPEAR,
YES I'LL MAKE THEM DISAPPEAR!
THEY'RE LIKE BEES AROUND THE HONEY.
BUT THEY'LL NOT GET THE WIDOW'S MONEY!
I-28
CASCADA: ST. BRIOCHE:
THE CAVALRY STANDS

HERE BEFORE YOU, MAAM
AND STATES AS A MATTER
OF COURSE:
I'LL LEAD YOU IN WALTZING
AS EASILY
AS REINING AND TRAINING
MY HORSE--
YOU REALLY MUST DANCE WITH
THE INFANTRY,
AT MARCHES WE'RE EQUALLED
BY NONE!
YOU'LL FEEL AS IF YOU'VE BEEN
AROUND THE WORLD,
JUST ENDLESSLY FOLL'WING
THE SUN!
I AM THE BEST, MA'AM
MAY I REQUEST, MA'AM
TO BE YOUR PARTNER IN THIS TO BE YOUR PARTNER IN THIS
LITTLE DANCE? LITTLE DANCE?
CAST A VOTE FOR CASCADA
GIVE YOUR VOTE TO ST. BRIOCHE
PLEASE GIVE THIS HUMBLE PLEASE GIVE THIS HUMBLE
PETITIONER A CHANCE! PETITIONER A CHANCE!
(MEN & CASCADA:) MEN & ST.BRIOCHE:)
CAST A VOTE FOR CASCADA

DO NOT VOTE FOR ST. BRIOCHE
PLEASE GIVE THIS HUMBLE PLEASE GIVE THIS HUMBLE
PETITIONER A CHANCE! PETITIONER A CHANCE!
I-29
HANNA: CASCADA: ST. BRIOCHE:
YOU TRY TO RECRUIT

MILITARILY
AND URGE ME TO JOIN
IN YOUR RANKS.
YOU HONOR ME, SIRS,
AS A WOMAN
AND FOR THIS I GIVE YOU
MY THANKS!
BUT SINCE I HAVE LITTLE
EXPERIENCE
AT MARCHING OR REARING
A HORSE,
I'LL PASS THIS UNIQUE
OPPORTUNITY
FOR PARTNERS EXERTING
LESS FORCE!
OH, I'LL BE GENTLE
NON-REGIMENTAL!
YES, I BELIEVE SIR THAT
YOU WOULD, OF COURSE!
BUT IF I SELECT ONE,
THEN I MUST REJECT ONE
AND I'D BE GUILTY OF
CAUSING REMORSE-- (with men:)
WHO SHOULD HAVE I CAN'T TAKE
SELECTION? REJECTION! (with men:)
MAKE ME YOUR
SELECTION!
MUST I BE GUILTY IF YOU REFUSE IF YOU REFUSE
OF CAUSING I SHALL DIE OF I SHALL DIE OF
REMORSE? REMORSE! REMORSE!
HANNA:
NOW THEN, MY DEAR SIRS,
YOU SAY I MUST PROCEED WITH
THIS SELECTION? VERY WELL,
IF YOU INSIST--
WOMEN:
LADIES' CHOICE! LADIES' CHOICE!
I-30
DANILO:
GENTLEMEN, DO NOT RESIST!
OH LISTEN TO THE WALTZ

COME, FEEL ITS RHYTHM
AND ITS MAGIC SUBDIVISION.
TAKE YOUR PARTNER AND LOOK
DEEP INTO HER EYES,
BECKONING: "FOLLOW,
I'LL LEAD YOU TO PARADISE!"
COME DANCE THE NIGHT AWAY,

MUSIC IS PLAYING.
HEAR ITS SOFT VOICE
SWEETLY SAYING:
TAKE YOUR PARTNER,
CHOICE IS FREE!
WOMEN: WON'T YOU PLEASE, SIR, DANCE WITH ME?
DANILO: AS THE BLOSSOMS OF APRIL AND MAY

COME AWAKE IN A GLOWING DISPLAY
SO DO SLUMBERING HEARTS EVERYWHERE
BLOOM WHEN THE WALTZ FILLS THE AIR.
WHEN THE MELODY SURGES AND SPINS,
SUMMONED FORTH BY THE CHARMED VIOLINS,
THERE IS NO OTHER WAY, WE MUST SMILE AND OBEY.
WE MUST DANCE WHEN THE WALTZ BEGINS!
WOMEN: YES, OBEY WITHOUT DELAY!
ALL: AH, LISTEN TO THE WALTZ COME FEEL ITS RHYTHM

AND ITS MAGIC SUBDIVISION
YOU'RE MY PARTNER NOW LOOK DEEP INTO MY EYES
HERE A VOICE WHISPER: "COME, FOLLOW, TO PARADISE!"
LET'S DANCE THE NIGHT AWAY, MUSIC IS PLAYING
CAN YOU HEAR WHAT IT IS SAYING?
LET US DANCE NOW, NO DELAYING:
UNTIL THE NIGHT IS GONE OUR DANCE GOES ON!
DANILO: (OH PETROVEDIA, IF YOU KNEW

THE HARDSHIPS I ENDURE FOR YOU!)
AND NOW, EXCUSE ME, CHER BARON,
I SHALL DEPART, MY DUTY'S DONE!
I-31
CASCADA: MADAME, YOU HAVE TO CHOOSE NOW!
ST. BRIOCHE: YOU SURELY CAN'T REFUSE NOW!
HANNA: OH, DEAR, I'VE MADE YOU BOTH UPSET!
DANILO: I SEE THIS ISN'T OVER YET!
HANNA: OH, MY, SO MANY BIDDERS!
VALENCIENNE: THERE IS ONE MORE TO CONSIDER!
DANILO: OH GOOD LORD! ONE MORE IS ALL I NEED!
VALENCIENNE: THIS YOUNG MAN DOES THE POLKA,

YOU'LL FIND THAT HIS MANNER IS NICE.
HE ALSO DOES THE MAZURKA,
WE'VE DONE THAT STEP ONCE OR TWICE.
YOU'LL FIND YOU'LL FLOAT LIKE A FEATHER,
HIS TURNS ARE AS SMOOTH AS CREAM.
AT WALTZING, TAKE MY WORD FOR IT,
I HAPPEN TO KNOW HE'S A DREAM!
SO DON'T REJECT HIM;

IF YOU SELECT HIM,
YOU WILL HAVE AMPLE REASON TO REJOICE!
WHEN YOU'VE CHOSEN ROSSILLION,
ADMIRABLE ROSSILLION,
YOU'LL HAVE SELECTED THE VERY BEST CHOICE!
CASCADA & GIVE YOUR\

MEN: DO NOT\ VOTE FOR CASCADA!
ST. BRIOCHE & GIVE YOUR\

MEN: DO NOT\ VOTE FOR ST. BRIOCHE!
WHO IS\
ALL: HE IS\ THE ONE WHO'S THE VERY BEST CHOICE!
I AM\
CAMILLE: PARDON, MADAME, THIS GLOWING PRAISE--
HANNA: NO DOUBT, I'D BE AMAZED.
BUT I'D PREFER A PARTNER IN WHOSE EXPRESSION I CAN SEE

A LACK OF INTEREST IN ME:
(Spoken:) Oh, Count Danilo!
YOU SEEM TO FIT THAT DESCRIPTION.

I-32
DANILO: (Spoken:) I? I regret, Madame, I do not dance.
HANNA: I TAKE THAT TO MEAN YOU DECLINE?
DANILO: DECLINE? OH, NO! BY RIGHT, THIS DANCE IS MINE.
HANNA: THAT'S RIGHT. AND SO?
DANILO: SO, IF THIS DANCE IS MINE TO USE,

THEN I MAY USE IT AS I CHOOSE.
THAT IS CORRECT, N'EST CE PAS?
HANNA: V'RAIMENT!
OTHERS: WHAT DOES HE MEAN?
DANILO: THIS DANCE, FOR WHICH I OFFER YOU MY THANKS,

IS WORTH AT LEAST TEN THOUSAND FRANCS.
TEN THOUSAND FRANCS, PAYABLE TO ME,
WHICH I'LL DONATE TO CHARITY!
MEN: TEN THOUSAND FRANCS???
ST. BRIOCHE: THIS IS ABSURD!
DANILO: IT CAN BE YOURS, JUST SAY THE WORD!
MEN: TEN THOUSAND FRANCS???
CASCADA: HE'S LOST HIS MIND!
DANILO: (NOW THAT SHOULD LEAVE THEM ALL BEHIND!)
DANILO: CASCADA: ST. BRIOCHE:
LOOK AT THEM TEN THOUSAND TEN THOUSAND

WHAT A NOBLE FRANCS?? FRANCS??
SIGHT THEY
ARE! THIS IS OUTRAGEOUS! THIS IS OUTRAGEOUS!
WHAT A SAD
RETREAT FROM ALL
THOSE LANGUID SIGHS
AND MELTING LOOKS!
BECAUSE THEIR HEARTS
AND SOULS, ARE IN
THEIR POCKETBOOKS!
YES, THAT'S THE WAY
OF MEN TODAY, A NOBLE
BREED INDEED!
I-33
(CASCADA, ST. BRIOCHE and the other men begin to withdraw. CAMILLE steps forward)
CAMILLE: HOW PAINFUL FOR THE CHARMING WIDOW!

THE TEN THOUSAND FRANCS, SIR, YOU SHALL HAVE!!
VALENCIENNE: SO, YOU'RE IN LOVE WITH HER?
CAMILLE: YOU TOLD ME TO, YOURSELF--
VALENCIENNE: DON'T YOU DARE, CAMILLE!!!
(VALENCIENNE drags CAMILLE away. BARON ZETA and the others depart, leaving
DANILO and HANNA alone.)
DANILO: OH WHAT A SHAME! THEY ALL HAVE LEFT.

AND NOW, MA CHERE MADAME, NOW I WILL CLAIM MY DANCE--
HANNA: NO, NOT ON YOUR LIFE!
DANILO: BUT, CHERE MADAME, I WAS YOUR CHOICE--
HANNA: DON'T PLAY THE DIPLOMAT! I WILL NOT DANCE!
DANILO: THE MUSIC CALLS US, HEAR IT INSIST!

SURELY WE DARE NOT RESIST.
(DANILO dances alone, at first, then with HANNA)
HANNA: (Spoken:)No, I don't want to. I said, I don't want--

YOU'RE A HORRIBLE MAN,
BUT YOU DANCE DIVINELY!
DANILO: I DO WHAT I CAN!
(DANILO and HANNA whirl dizzily to the waltz. We lose sight of them
among other waltzing couples as the curtain falls.)
END ACT ONE

II-1
ACT TWO
(Hanna’s mansion outside Paris. The stage is set with lanterns and bears a “Petrovedian” atmosphere.
During the introduction music, dancers in Eastern European peasant dress twirl and mingle with the crowd of
partygoers. When the music changes, a large flower is carried onto the stage. The flower unfolds to reveal
HANNA, who emerges like Venus from the shell, as the onlookers gaze with wonder:)
CHORUS: AH—
AH—
AH—
AH—
MEN: WOMEN:
HERE’S A PETROVEDIAN
PET-RO-VEDIAN SONG HEY-AH-HO!
ONE TO WHICH WE DANCE

WE DANCE THE WHOLE DAY LONG HEY-AH-HO!
LADS AND LASSES
COME LIFT YOUR GLASSES HEY!
COME DRINK DEEPLY
OF WINE AND SONG HEY!
BE RULED BY PASSION
AND NOT BY FASHION HEY!
IF YOU AGREE
WELL THEN, COME ALONG! HEY!
ALL:
COME SING OUR PETROVEDIAN SONG!
HEY!
HANNA: OUR FOLK SONGS TELL OF SPIRIT MAIDS

WHO HAUNT OUR WOODS, OUR GLENS AND GLADES—
WE CALL THEM “VILJA” IN OUR TONGUE;
HERE’S ONE SUCH SONG, THAT’S OFTEN SUNG:
THERE ONCE WAS A VILJA, A BEAUTIFUL SPRITE.

BY CHANCE A YOUNG WOODSMAN BEHELD HER ONE NIGHT.
TRANSFIXED BY THIS VISION HE GAZED MORE AND MORE;
BEWILDERED BY FEELINGS HE’D NE’ER FELT BEFORE.
TREMBLING WITH INTENSE DESIRE,
YET TROUBLED BY A SENSE OF DREAD,
SOUL ON FIRE, WITH A POIGNANT SIGH HE SAID:
VILJA, OH VILJA, SWEET MAID OF THE WOOD,

KNOW I WOULD DIE FOR YOUR LOVE, IF I COULD.
VILJA, OH VILJA, SO LOVESICK AM I,
LOVE ME, OR LOVELORN I DIE.
II-2
HANNA: OTHERS:
VILJA, OH VILJA,
SWEET MAID OF THE WOOD,
KNOW I WOULD DIE
FOR YOUR LOVE, IF I COULD—
VILJA, OH VILJA
SO LOVESICK AM I—
LOVE ME OR LOVELORN I DIE!
THE WOOD MAIDEN SMILED

BUT NO ANSWER SHE GAVE,
SHE BECKONED HIM INTO
THE WILLOWY GLADE.
HE NEVER HAD KNOWN
SUCH A RAPTURE AS THIS.
HE LONGED FOR HER TOUCH
AND THE TASTE OF HER KISS.
BUT, BEFORE THEY COULD EMBRACE,
SHE DISAPPEARED BEFORE HIS EYES!
SOON THE WOOD
ECHOED WITH HIS WEEPING SIGHS:
VILJA, OH VILJA
SWEET MAID OF THE WOOD,
WOULD I NOT DIE FOR YOU NOW,
IF I COULD?
VILJA, OH VILJA
SO LOVESICK AM I
LEAVE ME, AND LOVELORN I DIE—
VILJA, OH VILJA
SWEET MAID
OFTHE WOOD,
WOULD I NOT DIE
FOR YOU
NOW, IF I COULD?
VILJA, OH VILJA
MY DARLING, GOODBYE.
WITHOUT YOUR LOVE
I WILL DIE.
WITHOUT YOUR LOVE FOR LOVE
I WILL DIE. HE’LL DIE.
II-3
(At the end of the song, the entire group—except HANNA—is misty-eyed. Some openly weep,
including—and especially—BARON ZETA. HANNA is delighted. DANILO, late as usual for the party, sneaks
in and hides behind a shrub. HANNA sees his clumsy attempt at hiding, but chooses to ignore him for the
moment.)
ZETA
(drying his eyes:) Oh, thank you, Madame Glavari! (sobbing:) What a wonderful party!
HANNA
I’m so glad you’re enjoying yourself, Baron…
ZETA
Oh, yes! I haven’t had such a good time since I left Petrovedia!
HANNA
Yes, our countrymen do love sad stories… Perhaps you could tell me one now, Baron?
ZETA
Oh, gladly, Madame…but I am a terrible story teller….
HANNA
You did wonderfully well last night, Baron. Tell me another sad tale of Count Danilovich and his whereabouts,
why don’t you? He was invited to this party as well…but do you see him here?
ZETA
Er…no, I don’t….
HANNA
I can only assume that he had to spend the night engaged in….more military maneuvers?
ZETA
Er…yes, I suppose so…
HANNA
What else could possibly explain his sudden departure from the embassy last night, without so much as a
farewell--?
ZETA
Er…well….
HANNA
To say nothing of his failure to attend this gathering?
ZETA
Er…um….nothing, I suppose…oh….oh, yes! I did have to send him on a mission, now that I recall….
HANNA
More “secret French weaponry”, no doubt?
ZETA
Er…yes! Yes, that was it--!
II-4
(HANNA has been leading ZETA to the area where DANILO is hiding. She speaks deliberately:)
HANNA
Armaments which they are now stockpiling at Maxim’s, hmm, Baron?
ZETA
Er…um….
HANNA
You needn’t lie, dear Baron. Count Danilovich has quite a reputation for his carousing at Maxim’s. The
Grisettes seem to keep him busy night and day---for days on end….
ZETA
What can I say, dear Madame? Believe me, I will severely reprimand the Count for his indiscretions…as soon
as I can find him…
HANNA
Please do so, for his own good. It’s painful to see the erosion of his character…as fragile as it was to begin
with. In fact, I have a few suggestions which you can pass along to which might prove helpful.
ZETA
That’s very kind of you—
HANNA
Yes, it is. Well, until then….please continue to enjoy the party, Baron!
ZETA
(sensing dismissal:) Thank you, Madame. (He exits)
DANILO
(from hiding:) Why don’t you tell them to me yourself?
HANNA
Why, Count Danilovich! What a pleasant surprise!
DANILO
Thank you. Lovely party.
HANNA
Thank you. So glad you could come. (Beat) Tell me, do you own a watch?
DANILO
A watch? Well, yes—
HANNA
And do you know how to read it?
DANILO
I think so.
II-5
HANNA
Oh. I’m just trying to find a reason for your consistent tardiness. Or, perhaps it’s just that you don’t like
parties?
DANILO
A thousand pardons…Madame Glawari. I have been…preoccupied with matters of…utmost diplomatic
importance—
HANNA
Ah. Is that why you are hiding like this?
DANILO
Hiding? An officer of the Royal Hussars does not hide, Madame. I am reconnoitering!
HANNA
Oh…reconnoitering! Well, isn’t this fun? Playing soldier, and at your age! Tell me, can we women play, too?
DANILO
Absolutely not! Please try to be dignified, Madame.
HANNA
I shall try. (offstage, we hear the quarreling FRENCHMEN) Well, never mind. Here come some more
little playmates for you. Oooh! I have a wonderful idea! As a little amusement, later, why don’t all of you
restage the battle of Waterloo? You can play Napoleon. Ta, ta! (she exits).
DANILO
(under his breath, to himself:) I’m beginning to remember why I never married her.
(CASCADA, ST. BRIOCHE and the other FRENCHMEN enter, followed closely by ZETA and NIEJUS)
CASCADA
I know she was here just a moment ago.
ST. BRIOCHE
That’s because I told you so!
ZETA
Gentlemen, really—with all the eligible young women in Paris, why do you insist on hounding the poor widow?
CASCADA
Poor widow? Bad choice of words, Baron!
(The FRENCHMEN laugh. ZETA joins in good-naturedly)
LARS (to ST. BRIOCHE)

While we’re on the subject, I don’t appreciate the advances you have been making to my wife as well,
Monsieur Marquis!
II-5a
ST. BRIOCHE
Moi? Pardon, mon cher General, you misunderstand me…
LARS
Oh, do I? Well, understand this, you pompous peacock: the next time I catch you making bug-eyes at my
Gerta, I will pop them out of your skull and feed them to you like escargot!
(CASCADA laughs at ST. BRIOCHE’s predicament. MONTAGUE comes up behind him and taps him on the
shoulder)
MONTAGUE
And that goes for you, as well, Viscount! You have my Matilda positively flustered with all your bowing and
fluttering and flirting!
CASCADA
Fluttering? I do not flutter, Monsieur!
MONTAGUE
Hear me well, sir! Stay away from my Matilda or be prepared to face the consequences!
ZETA
Gentlemen, please….
LARS
It’s bad enough being here in Paris—all these decadent influences—they turn a simple girl’s head! But then
again, I’m sure you understand better than any of us what I’m saying, Baron!
ZETA
I? Well…
MONTAGUE
I’ve never seen my Tilly like this—all this giggling, and constantly flushed—I need to get her back
home to Devonshire—back to good old English values—of course, you sympathize with that problem, don’t
you Baron?
ZETA
Do I? Well…possibly…
JULES
Ah yes, we older men with younger wives, heh? It’s hard to keep them reigned in, n’est ce pas, Baron?
ZETA
Is it? Well, I suppose so…
NIEJUS
(taking ZETA aside:) What are we going to do, Baron??
ZETA
I wish I knew! Where the devil is Danilovich??
DANILO
(still behind the hedge:) At your service, Baron.
II-6
ZETA
Oh, there you are— (he doesn’t see him:) Where are you?? What are you doing???
CASCADA
There really is no reason for you to remain at this party, St. Brioche. You saw how Madame Glawari gazed at
me earlier—
ST BRIOCHE
Gazed at you? You self-infatuated… She sat next to me during the entire meal. She even gave me one of her
grapes—
CASCADA
She asked you to pass it to me and you ate it!
ST BRIOCHE
Cascada, I have had about as much of this as I can take—
CASCADA
So have I! You leave me no choice but to settle this on the field of honor, Monsieur. And I am an excellent
shot!
ST BRIOCHE
Monsieur, may I remind you that, since I am being challenged, I have the choice of weapons??
CASCADA
Choose any one you like, you son-of-a-Flanders-farmer!
ST BRIOCHE
I choose the sword, Monsieur, with which I will skewer you like the food of your Turkish ancestors!!!
(General pandemonium ensues as the FRENCHMEN engage in quarreling. DANILO interrupts:)
DANILO
Gentlemen!! (The quarreling stops) This is not the time or place for such activity. Besides, it seems foolish
that you are so anxious to die for the right to win this particular woman’s hand. God knows, the “winner”
wouldn’t have long for this world, after the wedding—
CASCADA
What is that supposed to mean, Count Danilovich?
DANILO
Oh, you don’t know? Oh. I suppose the news hasn’t reached Paris yet-- Good Lord, gentlemen, they don’t
call her the “Black Widow” for nothing—
II-7
ST BRIOCHE
The “Black Widow”?? Wait a minute, where have I heard that before?
ZETA
Call her what???
DANILO
Of course it’s just a rumor, you understand. Some people say she’s already disposed of some six husbands—
NIEJUS
I didn’t know that—
DANILO
A regular female Bluebeard—
ZETA
What are you saying????
DANILO
Rumors, just rumors, Baron—which we, as allies, are obliged to share with these colleagues in the French
diplomatic corps…as painful as it may be for us to do so, Baron…
ZETA
Oh? (he catches on:) Oohhh!
DANILO
Most people were shocked that old Glawari lasted as long as he did! A true testament to good living and our
Petrovedian diet—
ST BRIOCHE
Really?
NIEJUS
I didn’t know any of this—
DANILO
(tweaking NIEJUS:) Rumors, Niejus! Yes…let’s see…two in London, one in Zurich, one in Milan…and
Amsterdam…all in the short two years since old Glawari met his sad fate—
CASCADA
Oh, my!
DANILO
Yessir, busy girl, hmm? Now, I suppose she’s here to find a new victim from the ranks of Paris society.
Well, all I can say is: an Englishman or two is one thing—No offense, Sir Montague… but our alliance with
France is sacred to us, and we pledge to protect you, gentlemen…rest assured!
II-8
LARS
Hmm…And she sets a dangerous example for our wives as well…I’ve noticed a new gleam in Gerta’s eye
when she looks at me…and it’s not passion that I see there…
JULES
Just so! My Flora has been looking at me strangely as well…sort of like an owl watching a mouse….!
LARS
Or like a cat ogling a canary…!
MONTAGUE
Or like Tiny Tim and the Christmas goose…!
ST BRIOCHE
Women!!
CASCADA
They’re so devious!!!
DANILO
That’s God’s truth! So you see, gentlemen…it would be a brave man indeed—or a fool—who would let
himself be lured by the hourglass figure of this particular widow. But, then again, there never has been a
shortage of fools, eh, Baron?
ST BRIOCHE
Er…see here, Cascada, perhaps I was a bit hasty—
CASCADA
Moi aussi, St. Brioche!
ST BRIOCHE
Nothing wrong with a Moor or two in your ancestry, Cascada—
CASCADA
Nor your grandparents keeping cows, St. Brioche—
DANILO
Now, that’s better! Lord knows, gentlemen, we must stick together! We have a formidable enough foe in
women!!
(SEPTET—“WOMEN”)
II-9
DANILO: EVERY WOMAN
OTHERS: EVERY WOMAN
DANILO: IS A RIDDLE
OTHERS: LIKE THE SPHINX
DANILO: SHE WILL ALWAYS KEEP YOU GUESSING,

NEVER KNOWING WHAT SHE THINKS!
ZETA: HOW TO GET HER
OTHERS: HOW TO GET HER
ZETA: TO BE FAITHFUL
OTHERS: HOW, INDEED?
DANILO/ZETA: THERE ARE THEORIES ALL APLENTY
ALL: BUT NONE THAT ARE GUARANTEED!
DANILO: WITH ONE YOU HAVE TO SING HER PRAISES
OTHERS: SO AND SO AND SO AND SO—
ZETA: WITH TENDER WORDS AND LIQUID PHRASES
OTHERS: SO AND SO AND SO AND SO—
ST BRIOCHE: ANOTHER WON’T RESPOND TO FLATT’RY
OTHERS: SO AND SO AND SO AND SO
CASCADA: SHE MUCH PREFERS ASSAULT AND BATT’RY
JULES: A THIRD ADORES TO HAVE YOU PET HER
LARS: THEN MAKES YOU RUE THE DAY YOU MET HER
MONTAGUE: STILL OTHERS LIKE IT WHEN YOU BITE ‘EM

AND ON AND ON, AD INFINITUM
SO AND SO AND SO AND SO.
II-10
DANILO/ZETA: ST. BRI. CASC, JULES LARS MONTY
OH THE STUDY
OF FEMININE
WAYS WHAT ARE WHAT ARE
WE TO WHAT ARE WE TO
LEAVES A DO WITH WE TO DO WITH etc. etc.
MAN IN WOMEN? DO WITH WOMEN?
A PERMANENT
HAZE ALWAYS ALWAYS
SOMETHING ALWAYS SOMETHING
YOU CAN NEW WITH SOMETHING NEW WITH
THINK WOMEN! NEW WITH WOMEN!
TILL YOUR WOMEN!
BRAIN
NEARLY
WHIRLS,
THANKS TO
ALL: GIRLS, GIRLS, GIRLS, GIRLS, GIRLS!
WHEN
SUBJECTED PRETTY
TO FEMININE WOMEN PRETTY etc. etc. etc.
CHARM WITTY WOMEN
WOMEN WITTY
ALL YOUR WOMEN
HAIR SHOULD
STAND UP
IN
ALARM BRAINY
WOMEN BRAINY etc etc etc
SHE WILL ZANY WOMEN
FOIL WITH WOMEN ZANY
DISPATCH WOMEN
ANY PLOT
YOU CAN HATCH
LITTLE MAN
YOU HAVE MET
YOUR MATCH!
ALL: WOMEN WOMEN WOMEN WOMEN etc,
AH—
OH THE STUDY OF FEMININE WAYS
LEAVES A MAN IN A PERMANENT HAZE.
YOU CAN THINK TILL YOUR BRAIN NEARLY WHIRLS
THANKS TO GIRLS, GIRLS, GIRLS, GIRLS, GIRLS!
WHEN SUBJECTED TO FEMININE CHARM
ALL YOUR HAIR SHOULD STAND UP IN ALARM!
SHE WILL FOIL WITH DISPATCH ANY PLOT YOU CAN HATCH:
LITTLE MAN, YOU HAVE MET YOUR MATCH!!
II-11
DANILO/ZETA: MEN MEN MEN MEN NIEJUS
OH THE STUDY
OF FEMININE
WAYS WOMEN
WOMEN
WOMEN
WOMEN
WOMEN!
LEAVES A MAN
IN A PERMANENT
HAZE WOMEN
WOMEN
WOMEN
WOMEN
WOMEN!
IT IS DEEPER
THAN DIVING
FOR PEARLS WOMEN
WOMEN
THANKS WOMEN
TO WOMEN
GIRLS GIRLS!
ALL: GIRLS, GIRLS, GIRLS, GIRLS!
IF YOU THINK THAT YOU REALLY CAN WIN,

YOU HAD BETTER CONSIDER AGAIN!
SHE WILL FOIL WITH DISPATCH

ANY PLOT YOU CAN HATCH!
LITTLE MAN, YOU HAVE MET

YOUR MATCH!!
II-12
(After the song, HANNA enters, humming a reprise of the melody from her Act I entrance. The FRENCHMEN
hear this, gasp and exit, giving HANNA a wide berth. ZETA and NIEJUS follow the FRENCHMEN out.)
HANNA
Oh, Count Danilovich!
DANILO
Yes, dear Madame Glawari?
HANNA
What on earth were you men discussing? The others looked positively frightened to death!
DANILO
Oh, just…zoology. Mainly arachnids. Nothing terribly distressing.
HANNA
Is that so?
DANILO
Yes. Ah! You know, this party really is quite delightful. I almost feel as though I’m back home in Petrovedia.
HANNA
I’m so glad you approve.
DANILO
Tell me, what are you most fond of in our homeland?
HANNA
Oh, the simple life—simple food, simple folk—especially the men…
DANILO
Indeed. Oh, I feel so good, I want to dance! Do you like our native dancing, Madame?
HANNA
It’s lively, yes—
DANILO
Come on, dance with me now, just like old times—
HANNA
I’d rather not, if you don’t mind—
DANILO
Oh, come on!
HANNA
You first.
II-13
DANILO
Very well. Madame, I present une danse de notre patrie—
(DANILO breaks into a frenzied mazurka, punctuated by “cossack” kicks and hitches, until he collapses into
an exhausted heap. HANNA yawns.)
HANNA
Oh, dear me…I’m so bored. How I long for the company of young Da—
DANILO
Da-ni-lo??!!
HANNA
Da-niel! Dear Daniel deVilliers…from Antwerp…whom I’ve invited here for a short stay. Tell me, are there
any lively places here in Paris where we can be…amused?
DANILO
Mais, bien sure!
I’D TAKE HIM TO MAXIM’S
HIS FACE WOULD FAIRLY BEAM!
THE GIRLS ALL KNOW MY NAME THERE—
…in fact, you’ve probably heard of them. My Grisettes? I call them mine because I am so close to them, and
they to me. Oh yes, my Grisettes will show your little tulip a good time, never fear! Oh yes, Madame, you’ll
have to keep on your guard around them, or your young Dutchman will fly away for good! (he laughs at his
little pun) Ha, ha! Get it? Flying Dutchman? (HANNA does not respond) Just a little joke—
(The waltz music has begun. DANILO and HANNA regard each other in silence. Other couples start to dance
across the stage, some in light and some in shadow. On occasion, DANILO cuts in to dance with a woman, and
HANNA dances with a man. Soon they are left alone, on opposite sides of the stage, humming the melody of the
waltz.)
HANNA/DANILO
HMMM—
HMMM--- (etc.)
(They begin to mirror each other in a waltz, dancing as if together—but apart. As the dance ends, HANNA and
DANILO look longingly at each other, then HANNA quickly exits. DANILO starts to pursue her, but is stopped
as ZETA rushes in, followed by NIEJUS.)
ZETA
Count Danilovich!!
DANILO
Yes, Excellency!
ZETA
That was clever work!! Rosillion is unquestionably the leading candidate for the widow’s hand—especially
now that you’ve managed to cool the ardor of the others, at least for the moment—
II-14 REWRITE 1/17/10
DANILO
Is there a point to this, Excellency?
ZETA
Well, yes! I’ve received confirmation that there is a married woman in Rosillion’s life.
I wish I knew who she was! I’ve had my wife trying to worm it out of him for days—
DANILO
Have you really, sir?—
ZETA
Yes… Oh, she’s a clever little minx, my Valencienne! Quite a little spy, that one!
DANILO
Clever enough to be a double agent, sir—
ZETA
Yes! Quite so! Now see here—I believe that Rosillion will attempt a rendevous here, tonight---right on this
estate! Can you imagine that? Inviting his married mistress to meet him here, while he tries to woo the
widow??
DANILO
Disgraceful.
ZETA
Yes, isn’t it? The most likely spot would be that little pavilion—right there, across the pond…see it? Madame
Glawari jokingly mentioned that she had prepared it for any of her guests wishing a private tryst—and you
should have seen that lothario’s eyes light up! Like fireworks! So, I will post Niejus there, as a sentry—and I
want you to be on the lookout as well.
DANILO
For whom, sir?
ZETA
Try to pay attention, man! For Rosillion’s married mistress!! We must learn this woman’s identity, and then
expose Rosillion’s planned consorting with the widow to her. That should effectively neutralize him as a threat,
heh, Niejus?
NIEJUS
That is a…Caesarian strategy, sir.
ZETA
Yes. Good. So, if my wife can’t learn this woman’s identity, it is up to us to do so—
(ZETA starts to exit, grabbing Danilo to come with him).
Alright!! Everyone to their posts!! Count, you come with me…and for heaven’s sake, be careful not to stare
at the scoundrel if we find him. I don’t want him to grow suspicious—
(DANILO and ZETA exit, leaving NIEJUS alone)
NIEJUS
I wish somebody would!
II-14a REWRITE 1/17/10
NIEJUS (continued)
Oh, poor Baron Zeta… Talk about a “fool for love.” Talk about “love being blind!”
His wife is a Spring Chicken…he, an old oak in the autumn of his life, so buried in fallen leaves he can’t see the
forest or the trees!! You’d think these years in Paris would have awakened him to the ways of the world…
but even “The City of Lights” is not bright enough to help his dimwit vision.
Ah, Paris! You naughty, naughty city! You have ruined me for the simplicity of my homeland…thank God!!
I WAS BORN, BY CRUEL FATE, IN A LITTLE BALKAN STATE

WHERE WE GO ABOUT IN THE SAME OLD SUITS
SHEEPSKIN JACKETS AND BIG RED BOOTS.
WE ARE MORALLY CORRECT
BUT THERE ARE TIMES, I SUSPECT,
IN THE WAYS OF LOVE AND OF WEDDING VOWS
THINGS GET CIRCUMSPECT!
LESS THAN QUITE DIRECT…
WHAT CAN YOU EXPECT??
THAT’S WHY I LOVE PARISIENNES!

ALL’S FAIR IN LOVE AND WAR
THEY THINK ARCHAIC MORALS ARE A BORE!
AH YES, I LOVE PARISIENNES!
IN EVERYTHING, THEIR MOTTO IS TOUJOURS L’AMOUR!
IN MY NATIVE LAND BACK EAST, IT’S ON DRY BLACK BREAD WE FEAST.

WE USE DANCING TO ATTACT OUR GIRLS:
WILD MAZURKAS AND SILLY TWIRLS.
BUT, SUCH EXERCISE ASIDE,
(IN WHICH OUR MEN PLACE SUCH PRIDE)
WHEN THEY’RE DEALING WITH THE FAIRER SEX,
SKILL LEVELS SEEM TO SLIDE!
THEY ARE LEFT POP-EYED!
THAT’S WHEN WORLDS COLLIDE!
THAT’S WHY I LOVE PARISIANS!

THE MEN KNOW HOW TO LOVE!
THEY GO RIGHT TO ROMANCE WITHOUT A SHOVE!
AH YES, I LOVE PARISIANS!
LOVEMAKING IS AS SILKY AS A VELVET GLOVE!
(He dances with 2 girls who have entered, then:)
YES, PARISIANS ARE THE ONLY KINGS AND QUEENS OF LOVE!
(NIEJUS and the girls exit, as CAMILLE and VALENCIENNE are heard entering)
II-15
VALENCIENNE
Camille, you are truly exasperating!
CAMILLE
Why, my love?
VALENCIENNE
Because you won’t listen!!!
CAMILLE
But I do listen—and I hear the true meaning of your words, Valencienne!
VALENCIENNE
Very well. Since you will not—or cannot—hear, I hope you can read!
(She writes these words on her fan as she speaks)
“I am a respectable wife”!!!
CAMILLE
Valencienne--!
VALENCIENNE: CAMILLE, ENOUGH!
CAMILLE: BUT I AM SUFFERING!
VAL: THAT’S WHY YOU SIMPLY MUST GET MARRIED.

I WISH YOU’D SPEAK TO HANNA NOW, THIS MINUTE—
CAM: ALRIGHT, I WILL—

ALTHOUGH MY HEART’S NOT IN IT—
(They slowly get into a small rowboat, to row across the pond)
VAL: THERE COMES A TIME, WHEN TWO LOVES PART,

WHEN IT IS BEST IT’S DONE COMPLETELY—
I ASK YOUR HELP IN THIS,

AND LET THIS PARTING BE DONE SWEETLY.
CAM: HOW IS IT SWEET THAT I MUST LOSE YOU?
VAL: A GENTLEMAN, SIR, WOULD NOT PURSUE THIS—
CAM: YES, VERY WELL, I’LL SAY NO MORE—
VAL: I THANK YOU SIR, THAT’S BETTER BY FAR—
CAM: OH, LET ME KISS YOU!!!
VAL: YOU’RE HURTING ME DEEPLY!
CAM: FORGIVE ME PLEASE, MY LOVE—

II-16
CAMILLE (continued) (rowing as he sings)
JUST AS THE ROSEBUD OPENS
WHEN KISSED BY LIGHT OF SPRING,
SO HAS THIS LOVE AWAKENED AND
CAUSED MY HEART TO SING.
AS THOUGH THE CLOUDS HAD PARTED,

A GLIMPSE OF JOY I SEE.
A BEAM OF LOVE HAS STARTED
THIS BLOSSOMING IN ME,
AND NOW, WITH JOY BEFORE ME,

YOU ASK THE CLOUDS TO CLOSE—
TO FADE THE LIGHT OF SPRINGTIME
AND KILL THE NEWBORN ROSE!
OUR LOVE MUST HAVE ITS MOMENT,

THE LIGHT OF SPRING MUST SHINE!
IF ONLY YOU WOULD LISTEN,
THESE WORDS WOULD MAKE YOU MINE!
YES, IF YOU’D ONLY LISTEN,
I KNOW I’D MAKE YOU MINE!
(Throughout the following, the pavilon appears through the mist. Fireflies dance.
The scent of jasmine fills the air. VALENCIENNE begins to swoon)
VALENCIENNE OH, CAMILLE—
CAMILLE VALENCIENNE!
VAL: DON’T DO THIS! DON’T!

I BEG YOU, MY HEAD IS SPINNING NOW--!
CAM: I’LL LEAVE YOU, I PROMISE,

AFTER ONE LAST KISS—
VAL: NO, NOT HERE--!
CAM: SEE, THERE’S THE LITTLE PAVILION

WE CAN BE ALONE, JUST YOU AND I.
THERE, IN OUR LITTLE PAVILON,
IS WHERE FANTASY AND TRUE LOVE LIE!
THERE, WHERE NONE CAN SEE,
LET OUR DREAMS COME TO BE—
COME, LOVE IS IN OUR PAVILION.
WHO WILL EVER KNOW BUT YOU AND I?
(The rowboat is landed. CAMILLE leads VALENCIENNE toward the pavilion)
VAL: I SEE NOW THAT I CANNOT RESIST YOU—

II-17
CAMILLE VALENCIENNE
SEE, PRIVACY AT OUR COMMAND

BUT YOU MUST PROMISE
HOW COULD ANYTHING BE
MORE DISCREET? TO BE DISCREET!
HERE, WHERE NONE MAY PRY HERE, WHERE NONE MAY PRY,
JUST ONE KISS, THEN GOODBYE! JUST ONE KISS, THEN GOODBYE!
HERE, IN OUR LITTLE PAVILION HERE, IN OUR LITTLE PAVILION

WE’LL PRETEND THERE’S ONLY WE’LL PRETEND THERE’S ONLY
YOU AND I! YOU AND I!
(CAMILLE and VALENCIENNE kiss, then enter the pavilion and lower the lights)
(Niejus appears from behind a bush)
NIEJUS
Oh…I don’t like this! I don’t like this at all!! The Baroness and the Chevalier in the pavilion, and with the
lamps turned down! (ZETA is heard clomping clumsily through the brush) And the Baron hot on their
heels?!!! Oh, no!!!!
ZETA
(whispering loudly:) Niejus? Niejus!!??
NIEJUS
Over here, sir!
ZETA
(officiously:) What is the password, Niejus!!??
NIEJUS:
(under his breath:) Oh, for heaven’s-- (then:) “Eight bells”, sir—
ZETA
And “all’s well?”
NIEJUS
Well-l-l-l—
ZETA
Why is it so dark in there, Niejus? The lanterns aren’t lit—
NIEJUS
It’s…occupied, sir.
ZETA
Oh? Oh!!! Oh, I see! Did that devil Danilovich find some little maiden at the party, hmmm? Oh, come on,
I’m dying of curiosity! Let’s just have a peek in there—
II-18
NIEJUS
I wouldn’t do that, sir!! It’s….not Count Danilovich, sir….it’s---
ZETA
Well, who is it, man? Speak up!
NIEJUS
Chevalier Rosillion!
ZETA
Oh. Oh!!!! Is he with his married woman?
NIEJUS
I’m afraid so, sir!
ZETA
Good work, Niejus!! (DANILO appears) Oh, Count Danilovich! You’ve arrived just in time!
Niejus has cornered Rosillion and his married mistress in the pavilion. Soon we will know
her true identity!
NIEJUS
Exactly what I’m afraid of—
ZETA
Niejus, you go around back, in case they try to slip out that way. The Count and I will take up the watch from
here.
NIEJUS
Yes, sir! (as he creeps away:) Oh, good Lord! I’ve got to get the baroness out of this mess. I must find
Madame Glawari. She’s the only one I can trust to help! (he exits)
ZETA
It won’t be long now, Danilovich! Isn’t this exciting?? Soon, we’ll have Rossillion caught dead to rights and
right where we want him-- Wait! Wait a minute! She’s coming into the light now…wait…just a little more…
(he sees VALENCIENNE in the half-light)
Oh, my God--!
DANILO
What is it, sir?
ZETA
No. It couldn’t be—
(beat)
Yes, it is! It’s my wife!!!
(HANNA and NIEJUS enter unseen, upstage of the pavilion. NIEJUS mimes the crisis to HANNA. HANNA
understands and enters the pavilion. She exchanges cloaks with VALENCIENNE)
II-19
DANILO
The Baroness? You must be mistaken, sir—
ZETA
It is she, I tell you! (weeping:) I’d know that dress anywhere!
DANILO
Oh, no, Baron… I’m so sorry for you, sir…
ZETA
So am I.
DANILO
Well, sir…at least you can take consolation in one thing.
ZETA
Oh? And what’s that, pray tell?
DANILO
You are suffering this outrage for the good of your Fatherland, sir.
ZETA
Oh? Really? Fatherland be damned!!!!
(He bolts from hiding and confronts the pavilion entrance)
Alright, you two! Come out of there at once!!!!
(As the music starts, CAMILLE steps out of the pavilion, followed by HANNA who is wearing
VALENCIENNE’S distinctive overdress-cape)
FINALE ACT TWO
DANILO: OH—
ZETA: MY---
BOTH: GOD!!
HANNA: WHY, GENTLEMEN, YOU LOOK SURPRISED!
DANILO: IT’S HANNA AND CAMILLE!
ZETA: SHE’S NOT THE ONE I SAW JUST NOW!
DANILO: WHY, HANNA AND CAMILLE?!

I CAN’T BELIEVE MY EYES!
THIS CAN’T BE HAPPENING TO ME—
ZETA: MY WIFE, WHERE CAN SHE BE?
VALENCIENNE: (appearing from behind ZETA) YOU CALLED DEAR?

II-20
ZETA: WHAT IS GOING ON?
VALENCIENNE: WHAT’S GOING ON? WHAT DO YOU MEAN--?
DANILO: GOD! HANNA AND CAMILLE--?
CAMILLE: WE’VE HEARD THAT IN THIS SCENE.
ZETA: WHY, JUST THIS MOMENT, I COULD SWEAR I SAW

A WOMAN IN A FOND EMBRACE—
HANNA: AND, TELL ME, DID YOU SEE HER FACE?
DANILO: ZETA:
(LET’S HEAR HER STORY!) --AND, TO THIS GIRL WHO
LOOKED LIKE YOU, MY DEAR
THIS MAN DECLARING
ETERNAL LOVE!
HANNA: THE LADY? THAT WAS I!
DANILO: ZETA:
OH, HANNA! I THINK A MAN WOULD KNOW
HIS OWN WIFE’S DRESS!!
HANNA: (returning the over-dress cape to VALENCIENNE:) OH, THANK YOU MY DEAR
FOR LENDING ME THIS—
VAL./CAMILLE DANILO/ZETA NIEJUS

THIS IS EXCITING I AM CONFOUNDED I THINK I NEVER
I MUST CONFESS! I MUST CONFESS! SEEN SUCH A MESS!
HANNA: WELL, WELL, CHEVALIER – IT’S PLAIN TO SEE

THERE IS LITTLE RESPECT FOR OUR PRIVACY!
SO SINCE THIS AFFAIR IS PRIVATE NO MORE,
YOU MIGHT AS WELL TELL THEM
WHAT YOU SAID BEFORE.
CAMILLE: (to HANNA:) CAN YOU BE SERIOUS?
DANILO: I MUST BE DELERIOUS!
CAMILLE: A POOR EXAMPLE OF MY POETRY—

BUT I WILL TELL YOU, AND YOU SHALL SEE:
NIEJUS (spoken:) This should be interesting!

II-21
CAMILLE: JUST AS THE ROSEBUD OPENS
WHEN KISSED BY LIGHT OF SPRING
SO HAS THIS LOVE AWAKENED,
AND CAUSED MY HEART TO SING.
AS THOUGH THE CLOUDS HAD PARTED,

A GLIMPSE OF JOY I SEE.
A BEAM OF LOVE HAS STARTED
THIS BLOSSOMING IN ME.
CAMILLE VAL. HANNA DAN. ZETA
BUT NOW WITH

JOY BEFORE ME, OH LORD HE LOOKS I FEEL WHAT A
THE CLOUDS I THINK AS THOUGH AS THOUGH CONFOUND-
BEGIN TO MY HEART HIS HEART MY HEART ING
CLOSE. WILL WILL WILL SITUA-
BREAK! BREAK! BREAK! TION!
I DON’T
SO FADES UNDERSTAND!
THE LIGHT WHO KNOWS WHO KNOWS WHO KNOWS
OF SPRING- HOW MUCH HOW MUCH HOW MUCH THERE HAS
TIME, SO MORE I MORE HE MORE I TO BE AN
DIES THE CAN CAN CAN EXPLANA-
NEWBORN TAKE! TAKE! TAKE! TION!
ROSE! UNGRATEFUL
GIRL!!
WHEN LOVE’S AH! AH! SHE LIED
DENIED IT’S TO THIS YES! TO ME, OF INFIDEL-
MOMENT, LOVE HE REALLY TO THAT ITY THERES
THE LIGHT I MUST CARES! I MUST NOT A SIN-
OF SPRING NOT THERE’S THE RE- GLE
WON’T SHINE. RESIGN SIGN! SIGN! SIGN!
AND IF I MUST NOT OH WHAT

I CANNOT LISTEN TO A SAD
HAVE YOU HIS WORDS, PREDICAMENT BUT HE’LL
TRUE LOVE I CANNOT IT WON’T BE NOW THIS IS GET HER
SHALL NE’ER BE LONG BEFORE REALLY MILLIONS,
MINE! THINE! HE’S MINE! FINE! OH THIS IS
REALLY
FINE!
NO, IF I HONOR I FEEL THIS
CANNOT HAVE FORBIDS THIS FURY RUNNING TO FOIL
YOU LOVE, SO I UP MY THIS
TRUE LOVE I CAN KNOW I’VE SPINE! MARRIAGE
CAN NE’ER NE’ER BE WON AND HE OH THIS IS THE DUTY’S
MINE! THINE! IS MINE! REALLY FINE! MINE!
NE’ER BE NE’ER BE HE IS THIS IS DUTY’S

MINE! THINE! MINE! FINE! MINE!
II-22
(General pandemonium as the chorus enters. Much discussion ensues)
HANNA: (spoken:) And now, since you are all so curious, you will find out just what happened in the pavilion!
(under her breath:) Hola, Toro! Time for the kill!
ATTENTION, DEAR FRIENDS, I HAVE A PRONOUNCEMENT!
CHORUS: WHAT’S GOING ON?
HANNA: ABOUT A PENDING WEDDING ANNOUNCEMENT!
MONSIEUR CAMILLE—
CAMILLE: WHO, ME??
VALENCIENNE CAMILLE
OH, NO! NO!
HANNA: YES, HE AND I SHALL WED!
CHORUS: OH, BRAVO! GOOD FOR YOU!
VALENCIENNE CAMILLE DANILO ZETA

IT’S TRUE?!
NOT TRUE!
NOT TRUE?
IT’S TRUE!!
HANNA: I FELT I MUST SHARE THIS WITH YOU!
CHORUS: CONGRATULATIONS!
DANILO: I HOPE HE’S WORTH YOUR TWENTY MILLION!
ZETA: YES, SAY GOODBYE TO TWENTY MILLION!!
CAMILLE: (to HANNA:) THIS CAN’T GO ON!

I REALLY MUST OBJECT!
HANNA: (aside, to CAMILLE:) NO, DON’T! THERE IS VALENCIENNE TO PROTECT!
ZETA: (to VALENCIENNE:) CAN THEY BE SERIOUS??
VAL.: I SUPPOSE THEY ARE—
HANNA: OH, YES WE ARE!
ZETA: IF YOU MUST WED, WHY NOT THE COUNT--?
HANNA: THE COUNT?

II-23
DANILO: NO! FOR THAT TASK I’LL NEVER VOLUNTEER!
I GIVE MY BLESSINGS TO THIS UNION!
(privately, to HANNA:) IT SERVES YOU RIGHT!
HANNA: (she picks a rose from a trellis and smells it:) WHAT’S ON YOUR MIND?
DANILO: I’VE ALWAYS SAID, WHEN ASKED THE QUESTION,

I’D NEVER WED!
WHEN I OBSERVE THE MARRIED STATE,

I’M GRATEFUL I’VE NOT FOUND A MATE!
FOR MARRIAGE SEEMS, AT BEST SIR,

A SIZEABLE BURDEN
ALLIANCES FOR TWO, I’VE HEARD,

TOO QUICKLY WILL INVOLVE A THIRD
WHEN ONE OF THE PARTNERS FEELS A DWINDLING PASSION!
HER COZY COTTAGE MEANT FOR TWO
SOON HAS AN ARMY TRAMPING THROUGH!
BUT, IF A MAN SHOULD WANT SOME FREEDOM,

SHE THREATENS HIM WITH A DIVORCE!
HOW ANY MAN COULD SET HIS SAILS

IN SUCH A FRAIL SHIP IS BEYOND ME!
(the characters all interject, but DANILO continues:)
NO, THANK YOU, I’LL NOT DROWN!

ON BACHELORHOOD’S FIRM SHORES
IS WHERE YOU’LL FIND ME!!
VALENCIENNE
My good sir--!
ZETA: Well, I never--!
(HANNA delightedly addresses the crowd:)
HANNA: MY MARRIAGE WILL BE ONE DESIGNED IN THE PARISIAN STYLE

AROUND THE POINTS YOU’VE JUST MALIGNED IN THE PARISIAN STYLE
WE’LL LIVE AND LOVE THAT IS TO SAY IN THE PARISIAN STYLE
EACH ONE CAN GO HIS OWN SWEET WAY IN THE PARISIAN STYLE
HOW EXCITING, TRA-LA-LA-LA-LA-LA!

HOW INVITING , TRA-LA-LA-LA-LA-LA!
AND IF MY MARRIAGE CAN’T BE SO
I’LL NEVER MARY NO, NO, NO, NO, NO-NO-NO-NO-NO-NO-NO!
OTHERS: HOW EXCITING, TRA-LA-LA-LA-LA-LA! Etc.

II-24
VAL.: AND IN YOUR SCHEME FOR MARRIED BLISS—
HANNA: IN THE PARISIAN STYLE?
VAL.: MADAME HAS HERS, MONSIEUR HAS HIS?
HANNA: IN THE PARISIAN STYLE!
VAL: SO NOTHING WOULD GET IN THE WAY—
HANNA: IN THE PARISIAN STYLE—
VAL: OF OTHERS COMING INTO PLAY!!
HANNA: IN THE PARISIAN STYLE!!
BOTH: HOW EXCITING, TRA-LA-LA-LA-LA-LA!

HOW INVITING, TRA-LA-LA-LA-LA-LA!
AND IF (MY/HER) MARRIAGE CAN’T BE SO

(I’LL/SHE’LL) NEVER MARRY, NO, NO, NO, NO, NO-NO-NO-NO-NO-NO-NO!
CHORUS: HOW EXCITING, TRA-LA-LA-LA-LA-LA! Etc.
DANILO: (spoken a tempo:) I am boiling, I am steaming

In a moment I’ll be screaming!
LISTEN HERE!
I MUST SPEAK OUT!
(to himself:) BUT DEAR LORD, NOT SO INTENSE!

OH, MY ANGER’S TOO IMMENSE!
CALM YOURSELF, ON SOME PRETENSE—
(addressing HANNA:) NOW AS MY WEDDING GIFT, MADAME,

I’D LIKE TO TELL A LITTLE STORY—
HANNA: OH, GOOD! HOW VERY NICE OF YOU—

BUT, PLEASE BE BRIEF. WE HAVE SO MUCH TO DO.
(beat)
IS IT FUNNY?
DANILO: (through his teeth:) I DON’T THINK SO.

II-25
DANILO (continued:)
THERE ONCE WAS A PRINCE, AND A PRINCESS,
WHO PROMISED ONE DAY THEY WOULD WED.
BUT, SOMEHOW, THIS JOY WAS DENIED THEM—
AT LEAST IN THE BOOK THAT I READ.
THE PRINCE KEPT HIS FEELINGS UNSPOKEN

(FOR VERY GOOD REASONS, NO DOUBT)
AND, SO, THE PRINCESS GREW IMPATIENT
BECAUSE HE WOULD NEVER SPEAK OUT.
THEN, ONE DAY, THE HEARTLESS YOUNG VIXEN—

WITH NEITHER A WORD NOR A GLANCE—
DECIDED TO MARRY ANOTHER,
THUS ENDING THIS LIFELONG ROMANCE!
THE PRINCE SAID:

(spoken:) Well, well, my dear lady.
` You’ve taken me quite by surprise!
I thought that your vows were in earnest—
I now see they’re nothing but lies!
BUT, IF YOU SHOULD THINK THIS HAS HURT ME--?

HA, HA! MY DEAR, YOU SHALL SEE!
I’LL GO ON WITH LIFE JUST AS ALWAYS—
(spoken:) This is the Prince speaking, not me—
AND THIS WAS HIS FINAL INSTRUCTION:

(spoken, to HANNA:) “Go, wed him! My blessings on you!”
AND THEN, WITH A FLOURISH, HE LEFT HER
EXACTLY AS I MEAN TO DO!
HANNA: (She hands him the rose:) YOU’RE GOING, COUNT? BUT WHERE?
DANILO: (spoken:) Where?

WHERE I FEEL AT HOME, MADAME!
I’M GOING TO MAXIM’S

WHERE LOVE IS AS IT SEEMS
NO SILLY EXPECTATIONS
OF MARITAL RELATIONS!
AH, ALL THE PRETTY BELLES—
THEY KNOW ME VERY WELL!
I’M GOING TO MAXIM’S NOW
AND YOU CAN GO TO— (He exits as the phrase ends)
II-26
HANNA: AH, YES! HE LOVES ME, NOW I KNOW!!!
HOW EXCITING, TRA-LA-LA-LA-LA-LA!

AND NOW, WHERE EVER HE MAY GO,
HE’LL NOT ESCAPE ME, NO, NO, NO, NO, NO-NO-NO-NO-NO-NO-NO!
CHORUS: HOW EXCITING, TRA-LA-LA-LA-LA-LA!

AND IF HER MARRIAGE CAN’T BE SO,
HANNA: VALENCIENNE CHORUS

TRALALA TRALALA
HE’LL NOT ESCAPE ME NO NEED TO WORRY SHE’LL NEVER MARRY
NO, AH, NO! NO, NO, AH, NO!
AH, NO! AH, NO! AH, NO!
END OF ACT TWO

(AS DESIGNED: ACT TWO, PART ONE)
III-1
ACT THREE
(as designed: Act Two, part two)
A. The Pantomime (interlude/entracte)
“Danilo’s Regret” (underscore: No. 12a, Entre’act Vilja Lied./No.12b):
(As DANILO stands CS, GRISETTES and others bring him his evening clothes:
top hat, cape, gloves, etc. which he dons as if a stupor. The rose which HANNA
gave to DANILO in ACT 2 falls to the ground. As “Vilja” is played under,
DANILO dances with the rose. It crumbles. He tries in vain to place the petals back onto the stem.
Finally, he takes one petal of the rose and folds it, lovingly, into his pocket handkerchief.
He turns as if to exit, and enters the scene of:
B. Maxim’s (underscore: No. 13 Tanz=Scene):

(A circus-like atmosphere: waiters juggle glasses, bottles, etc. The tables are set and the customers gaily
cavort. Finally, the GRISETTE theme is heard, and they enter to the cheers of the crowd.)
GRISETTES: WE ARE CALLED GRISETTES AND PLAYGIRLS:

YOUR PARISIAN CABARET GIRLS:
(The GRISETTES, in turn, pronounce their names:)
LOLO, DODO, JOUJOU, CLOCLO, MARGOT, FROUFROU!
HANNA: (emerging from behind the line, dressed as a GRISETTE:)

Et moi!
WHEN A FIT OF BLUES ATTACKS HIM,

WHAT SHOULD ANY FELLOW DO?
COME ALONG TO DEAR OLD MAXIM’S—
WE ARE HERE TO COMFORT YOU!
GRISETTES: ARE YOU SAD OR TIRED MEN?

THERE IS SOMETHING YOU CAN DO!
EVEN IF YOU’RE DEAD AND WAXEN
WE KNOW WHAT TO DO FOR YOU!
LOLO: WE CAN SING AND TELL YOU STORIES—

PRETTY, WITTY, OFTEN TRUE—
DODO: WE ARE FRANCE’S GREATEST GLORIES—
: AND WE’RE WAITING JUST FOR YOU!
GRISETTES: WE ARE CALLED GRISETTES AND PLAYGIRLS:

HANNA: Et moi!
RITANTOU, RITANTIRETTE!
ET, VOILA LES BELLES GRISETTES:
LES GRISETTES DES PARIS!
RITANTOU, RITANTIRI!
III-2
GRISETTES: RITANTOU, RITANTIRETTE!
JOUJOU : AS A SPIDER SPINS HER COBWEB

LURING FLIES INTO HER DEN—
CLOCLO: AS SHE CAPTURES BUTTERFLIES,
WE WEAVE OUR NETS TO CAPTURE MEN!
GRISETTES: SPINNING, WEAVING, TO AND FRO,

LURING MEN ONTO OUR LAP!
THAT’S HOW WE ENTICE OUR VICTIMS
WILLINGLY INTO OUR TRAP!
MARGOT: FIRST, WE BAT OUR EYES A BIT

AND THEN WE HEAVE OUR BOSOMS, TOO!
FROUFROU: THEN, WE GIVE OUR HIPS A TWIST
AND, SOON, THERE’S NOTHING THEY CAN DO!
GRISETTES: YES, WE’RE CALLED GRISETTES AND PLAYGIRLS:

HANNA: Et moi!
HANNA/GRISETTES: LA, LA-LA-LA, LA-LA-LA-LA-LA-LA-LA-LA-LA!

HANNA/GRISETTES/CHORUS:
(note: repeat for encore as needed)

III-3
(At the end of the musical number, the GRISETTES and HANNA
cavort with the customers)
MALE CUSTOMER
Madame Glawari, what brings you here to dance with our Grisettes?
HANNA
Talent, monsieur, just talent.
(Singing, the GRISETTES dance off with the CUSTOMERS, leaving

HANNA and DANILO alone)
GRISETTES
LA LA LA LA LA LA
LA LA LA LA LA LA
LA LA LA LA LA LA...
DANILO
Madame, I wish to have a word with you --
HANNA
So? Go ahead.
DANILO
I forbid you to marry the Chevalier Rossillion!
HANNA
You forbid?? Oh, my, spoken just like a husband. You forbid...how droll!
DANILO
I see nothing droll about this matter!
HANNA
Don't you? I think it's hilarious. Count Danilovitch, I could swear you were jealous!
DANILO
Nothing of the sort. I am simply concerned about our national economy.
HANNA
Oh, really? In that case, you needn't have concerned yourself. It so happens my late husband -- the “glorified
bank teller”, as you called him -- was not only a kind and loving man, but also a true Petrovedian patriot. His
will stipulated that if I were to remarry, all of my inheritance would automatically become the property of the
Petrovedian National Bank. So, you see, I never had any intention of marrying Chevalier Rossillion--
III – 4
DANILO
But, why didn't you say so??!!
HANNA
You didn't ask me.
DANILO
Then all of this...frantic intrigue...was for nothing???
HANNA
I should hope not. (Beat) It was all very amusing, at all events. Watching you and Baron Zeta fussing and
fretting --
DANILO
I'm so glad Madame was amused! (Beat) Wait a minute...then what were you doing with that upstart in the
Pavilion??
HANNA
So, you are jealous!
DANILO
Yes! Er...No!! But --
HANNA
I was in the Pavilion with the Chevalier to protect another woman -- a certain married countrywoman of ours--
who stood to lose a great deal for her momentary indiscretion. So, you see, I, too, am capable of operating on a
secret mission!
DANILO
Ah! But why didn't you tell me so, instead of letting me go off like that...thinking --
HANNA
You didn't ask me.
DANILO
What a relief! Here I thought you were pledging yourself to another --!
HANNA
I could never do that.
DANILO
Really? Why?
HANNA
Because I am yours, you silly man.
DANILO
I thought so. Finally you admit it.
(MUSIC)
III - 5
DANILO: STRINGS ARE SIGHING,

WHY DENY THAT I LOVE YOU?
THEN I HEAR THE SWEET REPLY:
"YOU LOVE ME, TOO."
MUSIC SAYS IT SIMPLY,

HEAR EACH LOVING TONE
SAY TO YOU: IT'S TRUE, IT'S YOU
I LOVE ALONE.
HANNA: THIS MOMENT'S SO SUBLIME

OUR HEARTS HAVE FOUND A RHYME
LOVE HAS US IN A TRANCE,
AND THERE IS NAUGHT TO DO BUT DANCE.
TWO SOULS SOARING TO THE SKY,

WE'LL STAY TOGETHER YOU AND I
FOREVER FROM THIS DAY
THROUGH TIME WE'LL FLY.
(As the ensemble hums, HANNA and DANILO dance

the waltz)
HANNA/
DANILO: MUSIC SAYS IT SIMPLY
HEAR EACH LOVING TONE
SAY TO YOU: "IT'S TRUE, IT'S YOU
I LOVE ALONE."
(At the end of the waltz, the lights change, revealing

the rest of the company as they enter)
III – 6
OTHERS
Ah, Madame Glawari! etc. etc.
ZETA
Now, that's a pleasant sight, seeing you two together!
NIEJUS
Maybe now I can get some rest! (He sits; the fan which he found in the Pavillion in Act II is still in his pants.
He cries out:) AArrrrGHH! (The others watch as he painfully contorts about the stage).
ZETA
Niejus, what on earth is the matter with you?
NIEJUS
Oh, nothing, Excellency...it's just...something I picked up at the Pavilion --
ZETA
Well, here, Niejus, let me help you -- (He sees the fan sticking out of Niejus's pants). What is that? What have
you got there? (He pulls the fan away from Niejus) This is my wife's fan!
NIEJUS
Why, so it is! Imagine that!
ZETA
And you say you found this at the Pavilion? (He turns to VALENCIENNE:) Can you explain this, my dear?
HANNA
One moment, Baron Zeta! Since you saw fit to press your wife into service, spying on the Chevalier and trying
to foil any plans of marriage a foreigner may have had for me, I would imagine you are anxious to learn of my
decision in this matter. Or am I mistaken? Are your priorities elsewhere?
ZETA
Of course! I mean, absolutely not! I mean -- Madame, please tell me, what are you going to do?
HANNA
I will not marry the Chevalier Rossillion. In fact, upon further consideration -- (She glances at DANILO) --
upon further consideration, I have decided not to marry anyone at all, ever again!
DANILO
But, Hanna, wait! You mustn't say that!!
HANNA
Oh, and why, pray tell?
DANILO
Because I love you !
III – 7
HANNA
So?
DANILO
SO??? So I want you to marry me!!!
(DANILO throws himself to his knees in proposal.)
(Beat)
HANNA
I thought so. Finally, you admit it.
CASCADA
Poor Danilovitch! A noble sacrifice!
ST. BRIOCHE
I hope he enjoys his final hours!
(THE FRENCHMEN bow their heads in silent salute)
LARS
So then, Gerta my dearest—I’ve had enough of all this Parisian frivolity. I must return to my duties in Helsinki.
I shall depart tomorrow at 0800 hours…
GERTA
You, sir, shall go nowhere without me! I long for our home, and our sauna—where, to the beat of the birch
branches, you will find my performance of my duties will more than pass muster, my General. (LARS and
GERTA embrace to the applause of the others)
MATILDA
Oh, Monty…isn’t it romantic?
MONTAGUE
Hrrmmm….yes, quite. I don’t suppose the hills of Devonshire can hold a candle to Paris any longer, eh,
m’dear?
MATILDA
Oh, Monty, you foolish boy. It was just all the champagne, and caviar, and éclairs…and all these silly French
people. Take me home, Monty, back to steak and kidney pie and tweed. Lord, I miss tweed.
MONTAGUE
Oh, Tilly! I’ll have the whole mansion done in tweed…tweed curtains, tweed tablecloths, even tweed pajamas,
if it would make you happy! (They embrace to the approval of all)
III-8
JULES
And you, Flora? What would make you happy?
FLORA
But, Chou-Chou, you make me happy!
JULES
Well of course I do, I know that…but what other trinket would amuse you right now?
FLORA
(indicating NIEJUS) I think he’s cute. Would that be all right with you, Chou-Chou?
JULES
Am I a Frenchman, or am I not? (to ZETA:) Can you spare him for a while, Baron?
ZETA
Niejus, front and center. Niejus, you shall accompany the Count and Countess Camembert
as Petrovedia’s temporary liason to Normandy—for the production of wine and cheese. (aside to Niejus:) You
see, you do get those kind of assignments after all!
NIEJUS
I’ll do my best, sir!
ZETA
Yes, I’m sure you will.
(FANFARE)
NIEJUS enters UCS and announces:)
NIEJUS
Ladies and Gentlemen, Mesdames et Monsieurs, Her Most Royal and Regal Majesty,
Queen Myrna of Petrovedia!
(QUEEN MYRNA enters with fanfare, waving majestically to the crowd, as ALL sing
her praises:)
ALL (to the melody of CASCADA’s Act One toast):

TO QUEEN MYRNA OF PETROVEDIA
ONE THOUSAND YEARS OF HEATLH TO YOU
(ZETA approaches the Queen, kneels and kisses her hand)
ZETA
Your Majesty, we are honored by your presence. But to what do we owe
the honor of this unexpected visit?
QUEEN MYRNA
Why, to this telegram of course! (She brandishes a telegram)
III-8a
ZETA
Telegram??
QUEEN MYRNA
Yes, from Madame Glawari. Here, let me read it to you:
“To Her Most Royal and Serene Majesty…” etc, etc. etc….ah, yes…
“Am expecting proposal of marriage tonight
from your nephew, Count Danilo, STOP.
If you approve, request the honor of
Your presence tonight at Maxim’s in Paris, STOP.
P.S: Happy Birthday, STOP”
So, you see, I simply had to come…I couldn’t stop myself!
(QUEEN MYRNA laughs at her little pun, and the others join in)
ZETA
Well, that takes care of that! (to VALENCIENNE:) But, my dear, it still doesn't explain about this fan --
VALENCIENNE
But, Buttercup, have you seen what I wrote on my fan?
ZETA
What you wrote --? (He reads the writing on the fan:) "I am a respectable wife." (Tearfully:) Oh, my cherry
blossom, forgive me...I should have known!!
(MUSIC)
(THE COUPLES: HANNA & DANILO, ZETA & VALENCIENNE, CAMILLE & DODO, CASCADA &
JOUJOU, ST. BRIOCHE & LULU, NIEJUS & MARGOT and all the others face the audience for the finale)
III-9
HANNA/VALENCIENNE MEN & CHORUS: DANILO: ZETA:

AH THE STUDY OF
FEMININE WAYS WHAT ARE WE
TO DO WITH
WOMEN LEAVES A MAN
IN A PERMANENT
ALWAYS SOMETHING HAZE
NEW WITH
WOMEN YOU CAN THINK
TILL YOUR BRAIN
MADLY WHIRLS,
THANKS TO
ALL: GIRLS, GIRLS, GIRLS, GIRLS, GIRLS!

OH YOU MEN, IF YOU THINK YOU CAN WIN
YOU HAD BETTER CONSIDER AGAIN!
SHE WILL FOIL WITH DISPATCH
ANY PLAN YOU CAN HATCH,
LITTLE MAN
YOU HAVE
MET
YOUR
MATCH!
(Reprise Waltz)
ALL:
HERES THE DAY YOU HEAR ME SAY
THAT I LOVE YOU
LET ME HEAR YOU TELL ME THAT
YOU LOVE ME TOO.
MUSIC, LOVE AND LAUGHTER

MAKE YOUR HEART TAKE FLIGHT
SAVE THEM, TILL WE MEET AGAIN:
DEAR FRIENDS
GOOD-NIGHT!

Merry Widow Eng

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THE MERRY WIDOW

Original German libretto by

VILLAGE LIGHT OPERA GROUP VERSION

AMORE OPERA VERSION

JANUARY 17, 2010 REWRITES

© Richard Leighton 1986/2005/2010

7427 Westlawn Ave.

CASCADA: MY FRIENDS MAY I HAVE YOUR ATTENTION

So, now, WITHOUT FURTHER DIGRESSION

TO OUR HOST, HIS QUEEN AND HIS COUNTRY

ENSEMBLE: TO OUR HOST, HIS QUEEN AND HIS COUNTRY

ZETA: MY DEAREST FRIENDS I CAN ASSURE YOU

THIS EVENING'S PARTY, I'LL REMIND YOU,

WE CELEBRATE MY SOVERIGN'S BIRTHDAY;

ENSEMBLE: WE CELEBRATE YOUR SOVEREIGN'S BIRTHDAY;

MAJOR-DOMO: (announcing arrival): Lord and Lady Montague Mastiff of Devonshire!

MONTAGUE: Did I do something funny, m’dear?

MONTAGUE: But you haven’t had any yet….

MAJOR-DOMO: General and Madame Lars Gustaffson of Helsinki!

LARS: Hmm. Not to be repetitive, but I find him excessively…French…

JULES: Does he really think you would do that?

JULES: Eh? Oh!…oh, yes indeed!!

(The orchestra is heard playing ballroom music from within)

(As they exit, CAMILLE and VALENCIENNE enter)

VALENCIENNE: NOW LISTEN PLEASE, WHILE NO ONE'S NEAR

CAMILLE: THERE'S NO ONE'S VOICE I'D RATHER HEAR

VAL: THERE'S SOMETHING THAT I HAVE TO TELL YOU

CAM.: THERE'S SOMETHING THAT I HAVE TO TELL YOU, TOO

VAL.: BE STILL! YOU KNOW I WILL NOT HEAR SUCH WORDS

CAM.: WHETHER I SPEAK OR NOT YOU CAN HEAR

VAL.: OH, PLEASE, CAMILLE!

CAM.: WAS ENDED?

VAL.: I WANT YCU TO MARRY.

CAM. TO MARRY? ME?

WHOM SHOULD I WED, WHEN ALL THAT I AM

VAL: OH, WILL YOU BE STILL?

THERE'S NO WAY OF WINNING.

VAL: (cont.) BEWARE, MY FRIEND;

CAM: YES, YOU'RE A RESPECTABLE WIFE,

MY HEART'S VOICE WILL NOT BE DENIED

I KNOW ALL THE DANGERS

BEWARE, MY FRIEND, I'LL DARE, MY FRIEND.

(THE FRENCHMEN disappointedly exit)

(reading the card) --Then again, perhaps not--

NIEJUS: (slightly louder)

(HANNA GLAWARI enters, followed by a mob of FRENCHMEN)

HANNA: GENTLEMEN, I PRAY--

BUT POSSIBLY IN HOW RADIANT YOU ARE

HANNA: I HAVEN'T BEEN HERE LONG ENOUGH

MEN: OH! OH! OH!

HANNA: OH, COME NOW, WE DIGRESS!

HANNA: CASCADA/ ST BRIOCHE: MEN:

YOU HAVE A MIND YOU HAVE A MIND THAT

ANYONE WHO EVER WE

(the FRENCHMEN adlib and hover around HANNA.

(ZETA quickly follows HANNA into the party)

By the way...where am I, Niejus?

OH FATHERLAND THE THINGS I DO

YOU BECKON ME FROM DUSK TILL DAWN.

I'M ALWAYS RUSHING TO AND FRO,

REGRETTABLY, WE'RE NOW AT PEACE:

YOU'LL FIND ME AT MAXIM'S

WITH BUCKETS OF CHAMPAGNE

(The GRISETTES leave giggling, as DANILO collapses in a heap, supported by NIEJUS)