Tina Ingram

Professor Morean

English 1201- Online

22/July/2018

In 2010 I took my daughter and left an abusive relationship. Deciding to

leave this relationship was a decision that was terrifying to me and took

every bit of strength and courage that I could invoke. Looking at my

daughter, I knew that I had to make that move because I did not want her

to grow up thinking it was ok for a man to treat her abusively. I had to go. I

believed that if I made it to the other side of the proverbial fence that all

would be ok. I found the opposite. I never thought it was possible, but my

real nightmares had not even begun. My ex had yet to discover his best

form of abuse until he met the family court.

In the brochures, ads on television and educational units for domestic

violence, they all leave out a vital piece of information. None of them

mention to you that when you leave you are endangering your child to

more risk than if you stay. If I would have known then what I know now, I

would have stayed. I can handle the hits and kicks. In the family court is

where we live in a constant state of fear and are continuously revictimized

by the source that was put in place to protect children, if not the mothers,

being abused. Like many other abusers, my abuser routinely abuses my

daughter to hurt me and the court gives him full permission to do it. If I

dare object, threats of parental alienation arise as well as loss of custody.

Tina Ingram

Professor Morean

English 1201- Online

22/July/2018

We are one in millions of the same story. Many have had worse or even

fatal fates. This is the family court system in our world today.

The family court system is a very old and established branch of the judicial

system. This is not a new concept, nor is it a radically new idea that is

emerging.

Although the precursor of family court was really child or juvenile court, the

framers of family court probably could not have fathomed it would become a

tribunal for every family related dispute as it exists today.

The concept actually arose in the late nineteenth century when the first separate

juvenile court was established in Chicago. Massachusetts, Rhode Island, and

Indiana, under the auspices of the "common law doctrine" also set up a separate

court to try children. It is here where the seeds of parents patriae, or protection for

children against themselves or their parents began. With the common law system,

the law is made not by legislators but by the courts and the judges. It is often

referred to as the "unwritten law." In substance, common law lies in the published

court decisions. This offered judges within this system wide discretion to shape

family law.
Tina Ingram

Professor Morean

English 1201- Online

22/July/2018

By the 1960s, Family Court became firmly established and as Justice Potter Stewart

stated in Parham v. J.R. (1979) "issues involving the family are the most difficult

that the courts have to face." Hence, it is no surprise that family law cases are some

of the most disputable. Family cases actually placed state and federal regulations

against disputes brought by fathers, mothers, husbands, wives and

children. (Belou).

It became a controversial issue that demanded attention over the past few

decades as increasingly people have declared their rights being violated

and corruption within the court system. With the advances of technology

and social media, people have been able to reach out to one another and

have realized that they are not alone. This event that happened to them,

loss of custody, parental alienation, domestic abusers legally abusing

victims via courts, these are not isolated events.

Twenty years ago, a Pennsylvania attorney predicted that the court was

wide open for corruption and the potential to abuse power was right under

the people’s nose. He warned the people about laws being enacted

without legislation by lawyers. These laws are named as codes or rules.

They are in every court and we rarely realize that this law being used for or
Tina Ingram

Professor Morean

English 1201- Online

22/July/2018

against us was never passed through the proper channels to become law.

It is a discretionary power of the judges and used by the lawyers the make

them up. (Balogna)

In 2009 the family court was commissioned to enter into a feasibility study

in Ohio by the Supreme Court. The results proved several problems, but

nothing was done to rectify these problems. The report stated “There is

little consensus, however, concerning the specific goals of a family court.

There is even less agreement concerning the best vehicle for family”

(Effort) The court was detailed as to have one leadership with a common

purpose, working as a unit, with one set of family records in one place,

under the direction of one judge. This opened the door to a system with no

checks and balances. There is no authority to answer to and gave family

court judges wide discretion of power to use in whatever way they see fit.

It employed the use of guardian ad Liedums under the superintendence

rule 48. Which is supposed to give a separate voice or watchdog for the

child. These guardians are supposed to undergo training and investigate

the case so that they can report a best interest of the child finding to the

judge. Sadly, it has been a position that has abused authority, left parents

in financial ruin (due to billable hours for service), and guardians have
Tina Ingram

Professor Morean

English 1201- Online

22/July/2018

earned a reputation of doing little to earn the pay. The list of guardians

available for cases is kept at the judge’s desk and the judge assigns the

guardian at once, needed or not. This can cost thousands of dollars to

each side of the case. If you do not have the money to pay the guardian,

you better find it. It does not matter if the rent is paid or the children starve,

in the court’s eyes, the guardian can and will be paid NO MATTER WHAT.

It is a role of picking a party for the child and many experts feel that this

wasted expense is the job of the judge.

For domestic violence victims this can pose a genuine issue. Sometimes

the act of getting out was all they could do. Financially, they are in ruins.

The abuser has them at a disadvantage and the courts allow this to go on.

The courts consistentantly have shown throughout the entire world to

support the efforts of an abusive partner to legally harass a survivor

through the courts.

Women report feeling victimized all over again after leaving court (Patillo).

Their abusers are often revered while they are belittled and pathologized

by the courts. The system trusted to protect them is now the perpetrator.

If a woman raises allegations of abuse to protect her child, it is custody

suicide. In a study done by Joan Meier on the family court system, she
Tina Ingram

Professor Morean

English 1201- Online

22/July/2018

found that 59% of mothers who reported abuse were sanctioned for

reporting it, courts were highly suspicious of mothers’ motives for being

concerned with abuse. 2/3 of mothers were pathologized for advocating for

the safety of their children, custody evaluators and G.A.L.’s frequently

accused mothers of attempting to alienate their children from the father

despite direct evidence of abuse. (Meier)

Parental alienation is a syndrome denied by the American Psychiatry

Association and was refused by the DSM-V for treatment purposes. It is

not a real condition. It is a propaganda widely spread that originated by

Richard Gardner, a father’s rights activist. It claims that a mother will

withhold the child from the other parent for her own selfish reasons and

that is abuse. It has taken root in the courtrooms despite proof that it is not

a real condition and is used as a weapon against mothers with legitimate

claims of abuse. If a child resists seeing the father, the mother is thereby

an alienator.

This is not to say that there are not cases where women do not use the

child as a weapon toward the other person, however, these cases are the

exception not the rule as fathers’ rights activists would have most believe.
Tina Ingram

Professor Morean

English 1201- Online

22/July/2018

Legitimate claims of abuse are ignored and worse yet, thousands of

children are given custody to abusers as a direct result of this propaganda.

The women’s coalition is a group of women from all over the world that

have united fight the blatant corruption in the family court system that has

put their children in the arms of abusers, or worse for some, have killed

their children. They work hard every day toward reform and awareness.

Having been previously silenced during the court battle itself, they were

unable to take a public stand and be heard. (Family court comes with a

gag order that has very harsh consequences if violated). Now, they are

free from the binding court order and the destructive hands of the abuser.

They live in fear for their children every day, but they never stop fighting.

Every story is unique but has the same core. The courts did not have their

back when they got the courage to leave and they were penalized for

speaking up.

Why do the courts do this? As early as Karl Marx, experts have been

shunned for bringing to light issues of abuse toward children. It is the ugly

that no one wants to see. While they know it is there, it is hard to reconcile

a charming man who is dressed nicely and displaying good manners to a

claim of the mother as a liar or dramatic. Already conditioned to believe

Tina Ingram

Professor Morean

English 1201- Online

22/July/2018

the worst about mothers, a good or even adequate attorney easily closes

the deal.

What is the solution? Accountability is the first step. There needs to be

education in the courts that is mandatory for all people involved in

domestic violence or abuse proceedings.

In 2016, Ted Poe, House Rep for Texas introduced legislation that would

stop abusers from having access to survivors and their children. This

would elevate the coercive control they have over the survivor. In his

proposal the abuse allegations would have to be thoroughly investigated

for 2 years before custody and visitation could even be considered. It is

still awaiting approval and he hopes to see it pass by the 115 th House in

Jan 2019.

Where are the sanctions for the abusers who diligently look to control and

hurt the ones that left? Coercive control is more than a physical beating. It

includes harassment, financial abuse, stalking, all these the court allows

an abuser to legally do to a victim with no ramifications.

Financially, courts can be devastating, women find themselves breaking to

the will of the abuser out of lack of funds and the family court does not
Tina Ingram

Professor Morean

English 1201- Online

22/July/2018

support legal services. Pro Se litigants up against well-groomed

professionals that are in an alliance with each other do not stand a

chance.

A call to action needs to be heard. There needs to be a declaration that it

will not be tolerated anymore. A complete overhaul of the court system is

in dire need and a system in place that is fair and impartial. One that

mirrors the criminal system. Judges are elected by ballot each term, no

more appointed magistrates that have never ending terms, and severe

sanctions for both parties if they behave immorally towards the future well-

being of the child. There is no need for a guardian ad Liedums, this is

sheer laziness on the part of the court. Court experts need not be

continuous staff of the court. It promotes improper relationships amongst

the parties involved.

For cases of domestic violence, women (or men) should not have to be

alone in the court. There should always be a support person just as with

the criminal court. Court watchers should be regularly employed just to

keep the court staff in place. Let the people have full access to govern the

ones chose to protect them.

Tina Ingram

Professor Morean

English 1201- Online

22/July/2018

Children need to be recognized and valued. Their opinion does matter in

their life. It is not necessary to claim that they have no say because they

are a child. Age has nothing to do with quality of life.

And finally, for all the corrupt judges and staff that have engaged in the

heinous act of putting innocent children behind their selfish ego or greed,

prison time should only be the start of a sentence for them. Each

punishment should be tailored to fit the amount of lives they destroyed.

Tina Ingram

Professor Morean

English 1201- Online

22/July/2018

Works Cited
Balogna, Jason. "This US Attorney Nailed It 20 Years Ago : Potential For

Abuse of Power." Pennsylvania Court Watch 1998.

Belou, Effie. "History of the Family Court." (n.d.).

Effort, Collaborative. Ohio Family Court Feasability Study. Review of

Family Court System. Pennsylvania: Supreme Court, n.d.

Meier, Joan. Empirical Study Into Family Court. 2017. Dept. of Justice.

Patillo, Natalie. "For Abuse Survivors Custidy Remains A Means By Which

Abusers Can Retain Their Control." Pacific Standard 29 March

2018.