1

00:00:19,960 --> 00:00:22,167

SELINA: Thank you so much
for setting this interview up, Dan.

2
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- I really appreciate it. It's perfect.
- My pleasure.

3
00:00:23,600 --> 00:00:24,601
- Look, this is a walk in the park.
- Yeah.

4
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This is a nice casual conversation
between two friends.

5
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- Today, America is a guest in your home.
- Welcome, America.

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The thing to keep in mind is
Janet needs this more than you do.

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- That is so true.
- Okay.

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(SOFTLY) I mean,
she's kind of a lightweight now.

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- We're doing her a favor.
- She's a dud.

10
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You know what? We got to prep.
Prep time, let's go.

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- DAN: Okay.
- The song that offended half of Europe?

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- DAN: Uh-huh.
- It didn't offend half of Europe.
13
00:00:46,640 --> 00:00:47,801
Okay, fine.

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Well, I have to tell you, Janet,
that was a lighthearted parody.

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On the campaign trail,
you and Andrew were all smiles,

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but behind the scenes,
you were fighting like snakes in a bag.

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You're a fraud and a liar, ma'am.

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- Wow. What? What are you doing?
- I'm hitting you.

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Guys, we're prepping for a puff piece,
not for a roast.

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Right. What is she wearing, by the way?

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She's wearing a, uh, navy jacket.

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It's conservative and desperate
at the same time. It's...

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What? Look at what I'm wearing.

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00:01:11,000 --> 00:01:13,446
Do we know what she's wearing yet?
Can we find out?

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We are gonna go in there in just a moment.
26
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- They're expecting a puff piece.
- Right.

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There's the bluff puff,
which we're gonna start out with.

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You're her friend.
You went to high school together.

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- Mmm-hmm.
- You guys like each other.

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Then we switch right over to rough puff.

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00:01:23,320 --> 00:01:25,163
- Mmm-hmm.
- Okay? Nobody does rough puff like you.

32
00:01:25,240 --> 00:01:26,241
(BOTH GROWL)

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00:01:26,320 --> 00:01:27,970
- Give me that rough puff.
- All right, Puff Daddy.

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- Ooh.
- What is this one doing?

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He is moving a legless horse.

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00:01:33,160 --> 00:01:35,481
- Oh, Catherine.
- Miss Ryland.

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- It is such an honor to meet you.
- It's a pleasure to meet you.

38
00:01:39,480 --> 00:01:41,289
- I'm such a fan of yours.
- Thank you.

39
00:01:41,360 --> 00:01:43,522
I actually am hoping to
study broadcast journalism.

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Right now I'm studying film studies
and postmodern dance.

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00:01:47,000 --> 00:01:48,081
How wonderful.

42
00:01:48,160 --> 00:01:50,925
We'll have to talk about that
when the cameras are rolling.

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I would love that.

44
00:01:52,040 --> 00:01:55,601
I'm taking this really cool class where we sort
of debate current issues through movement.

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00:01:55,680 --> 00:01:57,170
- Let's get you miked up.
- Oh.

46
00:01:57,240 --> 00:01:58,924
Oh, my God. This is a problem.

47
00:01:59,000 --> 00:02:00,684
- Look at this.
- For the poof, you mean?

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Put your hands in your pockets.

49
00:02:02,200 --> 00:02:04,441
Looks like I'm masturbating
if I got my hands in my pockets.

50
00:02:04,560 --> 00:02:06,927
Put the blanket over it,
or is that too FDR?
51
00:02:07,000 --> 00:02:07,967
Can you guys please kneel down?

52
00:02:08,040 --> 00:02:11,681
'Cause I feel like I fell into a well
or something and it's hurting my neck.

53
00:02:11,760 --> 00:02:13,922
Okay, they're gonna bring
up the rafting trip.

54
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Well, I took my ex down to the river,

55
00:02:16,040 --> 00:02:18,611
and, uh, I tried to smash his head
in with a rock and then drown...

56
00:02:18,680 --> 00:02:19,920
(ALL LAUGH)

57
00:02:20,000 --> 00:02:21,650
- This is Cody Marshall.
- Cody Marshall.

58
00:02:21,720 --> 00:02:23,404
<i>- He's the producer for First Response.
- Hi, Cody</i> Marshall.

59
00:02:23,480 --> 00:02:25,926
I'm sorry, am I interrupting
a team prayer meeting?

60
00:02:26,040 --> 00:02:28,486
We're just doing a height thing.
(LAUGHS) it was nothing.

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00:02:28,560 --> 00:02:29,607
CODY: Okay. Good luck, everyone.

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00:02:29,680 --> 00:02:32,160
- Thank you so much. Very kind. Thank you.
- Good luck.

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00:02:32,240 --> 00:02:33,924
Thanks for being here.
We really appreciate it.

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(SIGHS) Okay, she's wearing a bluish dress
like she vomited flowers all over herself.

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00:02:38,560 --> 00:02:40,767
- She's kind of a frumpy librarian.
- Okay. All right.

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00:02:40,840 --> 00:02:42,200
Yes! All right, we're in business.

67
00:02:42,240 --> 00:02:44,288
- What?
- Just confirmed a leaked e-mail.

68
00:02:44,360 --> 00:02:47,170
Her ex-husband promising access
for business favors.

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00:02:47,240 --> 00:02:50,847
- He actually brags about it.
- I know. It's almost too painful.

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Brags about access.

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Just drag her in with the kindness, then turn
great white and start taking chunks out of her.

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00:02:56,320 --> 00:02:57,401
She's not much of a meal.

73
00:02:57,480 --> 00:02:59,528
- Oh, is it Greg?
- Gary.

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00:02:59,600 --> 00:03:01,841
- Gary, we're all set up, so if you can...
- GARY: Yeah.

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00:03:01,920 --> 00:03:03,445
Great. Yeah.
76
00:03:03,800 --> 00:03:06,406
- Madam Vice President.
- Janet Ryland.

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Gosh, I think the last time
that we saw each other was at the...

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00:03:09,600 --> 00:03:12,046
- The Correspondents' Dinner.
- The Correspondents' Dinner. That's right.

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00:03:12,120 --> 00:03:14,168
- I think you've grown since then.
- (LAUGHS)

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00:03:14,240 --> 00:03:15,401
Either that or you've gotten shorter.

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00:03:15,480 --> 00:03:18,450
- Oh, well...
- No, it's me. I've got heels on.

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00:03:18,520 --> 00:03:20,522
Well, anyway, I'm so happy you're here.

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00:03:20,600 --> 00:03:23,206
- So you found the joint okay.
- Oh, yeah.

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00:03:23,280 --> 00:03:25,362
I think this is our fourth
vice presidential interview.

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- Is that so?
- Mmm-hmm.

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00:03:26,480 --> 00:03:28,767
The three of them were excellent,
so no pressure.

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00:03:28,840 --> 00:03:31,764
- He's talking to me.
- Okay.

88
00:03:31,840 --> 00:03:34,081
So what is the plan, then?
Oh, what are we going to do?

89
00:03:34,160 --> 00:03:36,891
Well, we'll start, I think,
just with a little walk around the room.

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00:03:36,960 --> 00:03:39,327
And then the formal interview,
I thought, right here.

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00:03:39,400 --> 00:03:40,925
- Oh, right here? Okay.
- Yeah.

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But that means that this has to go.

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00:03:42,880 --> 00:03:44,530
I thought you were doing it over there.

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00:03:44,600 --> 00:03:47,649
No, we did, but we're gonna do it here,
and that's perfectly fine.

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So we'll get that poor thing away.

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00:03:50,920 --> 00:03:53,287
Anyway, um, have you met my daughter?

97
00:03:53,360 --> 00:03:55,681
So you did get my final e-mail on topics?

98
00:03:55,760 --> 00:03:56,921
No, but my spam filter did.

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00:03:57,000 --> 00:03:58,490
Seriously, did you get it?

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00:03:58,560 --> 00:04:01,040
Did I? (LAUGHS)

101
00:04:01,120 --> 00:04:04,044
Yeah, we're all set.
Let's make some history here, folks.

102
00:04:04,120 --> 00:04:05,963
CODY: Okay, roll cameras.

103
00:04:06,040 --> 00:04:10,204
Thank you so much for inviting us into
your home today, Madam Vice President.

104
00:04:10,280 --> 00:04:12,044
Oh, well, it's certainly my pleasure.

105
00:04:12,120 --> 00:04:13,246
I thought it might be fun

106
00:04:13,320 --> 00:04:17,769
to talk about what's original
and what's been augmented over the years.

107
00:04:17,840 --> 00:04:20,571
- Uh, we're talking about the building, right?
- (BOTH LAUGH)

108
00:04:22,360 --> 00:04:25,569
- Because I'm original.
- You certainly are.

109
00:04:25,640 --> 00:04:26,846
- No, yes, the building, ma'am.
- Yes.

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00:04:26,920 --> 00:04:29,969
SELINA: Um, the building itself
is Queen Anne style.

111
00:04:30,080 --> 00:04:37,043
Many of the objects, um, are from the good
old boys in the Navy, as a matter of fact.

112
00:04:37,120 --> 00:04:38,281
- Really?
- Jolly Jack Tars.

113
00:04:38,360 --> 00:04:42,285
For instance,
this spyglass here, or telescope...
114
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- To see spies. (LAUGHS)
- If only, right?

115
00:04:45,400 --> 00:04:48,210
You know, since you brought it up,
would you care to comment

116
00:04:48,280 --> 00:04:52,569
on the CIA operative rescued
with the students in Uzbekistan?

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00:04:52,640 --> 00:04:53,846
Well, I really...

118
00:04:53,920 --> 00:05:00,087
I wouldn't know what to say because, at
this point, the investigation is pending.

119
00:05:00,720 --> 00:05:05,760
Now this here
is a stunning sort of navigational device.

120
00:05:05,840 --> 00:05:08,241
I just thought you might want to comment on

121
00:05:08,320 --> 00:05:11,244
how he endangered
the lives of those young students.

122
00:05:11,320 --> 00:05:17,726
But it would be wrong and unethical
for me to prejudge the investigation.

123
00:05:20,840 --> 00:05:22,729
- This is a bell.
- (BELL DINGS)

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00:05:22,840 --> 00:05:25,650
Can we get some shots ofjust you
and Janet walking in the hallway?

125
00:05:25,760 --> 00:05:26,761
- Sure.
- No sound.

126
00:05:26,840 --> 00:05:29,241
We're gonna just do some establishing
shots. We'll put her voice over...

127
00:05:29,320 --> 00:05:31,049
- We'll lay that in later.
- Yeah, okay.

128
00:05:31,120 --> 00:05:32,849
CODY: And action.

129
00:05:34,800 --> 00:05:39,249
SELINA: Yeah, I thought we said that the spy
thing was completely off-limits, you know?

130
00:05:39,320 --> 00:05:40,401
JANET: I'm sorry, it seemed to me...

131
00:05:40,480 --> 00:05:46,442
SELINA: I'm really hoping that that's gonna
be the last and only gotcha question.

132
00:05:46,520 --> 00:05:50,684
JANET: ltjust seemed to me
that you were wanting me to bring it up.

133
00:05:50,760 --> 00:05:53,366
SELINA: No. That wasn't the case at all.

134
00:05:53,440 --> 00:05:54,771
JANET: I understand why you're tense.

135
00:05:54,840 --> 00:05:58,049
SELINA: No, I'm not tense, Janet.
I'm not even remotely tense.

136
00:05:58,120 --> 00:06:00,771
- Just trying to get this done right.
- Mmm-hmm.

137
00:06:01,120 --> 00:06:04,442
SELINA: This is some old shit by somebody.
I don't know who it is.

138
00:06:04,520 --> 00:06:07,046
JANET: Is this house haunted?
SELINA: Oh, God, I don't know.
139
00:06:07,120 --> 00:06:11,011
I hate this house, to tell you the truth.
It's like living in a doll's jail.

140
00:06:11,320 --> 00:06:12,400
Cynthia, could I get clips?

141
00:06:12,440 --> 00:06:14,600
CODY: Okay, let's settle.
Clear the background, please.

142
00:06:14,640 --> 00:06:16,608
- Gives you a nicer line.
- Oh, really?

143
00:06:16,680 --> 00:06:18,523
You don't need clips. Your shape is great.

144
00:06:18,600 --> 00:06:20,409
- But what about this?
- Oh, my God.

145
00:06:20,480 --> 00:06:23,484
Okay, here, let's tuck this under.
(SOFTLY) Put your hands like this.

146
00:06:25,640 --> 00:06:28,041
- But that looks like I have a stomachache.
- Thank you so much.

147
00:06:28,120 --> 00:06:30,885
Okay, uh, let's roll cameras.

148
00:06:30,960 --> 00:06:33,361
Everybody settle in here. Thank you, Glen.

149
00:06:33,440 --> 00:06:35,090
- CODY: Sound?
- Sound speeding.

150
00:06:35,160 --> 00:06:36,764
CODY: And we are rolling.

151
00:06:36,840 --> 00:06:39,366
You know what? I'm feeling
a little bit dark.

152
00:06:39,440 --> 00:06:41,807
Yeah, just while they're cut.

153
00:06:41,920 --> 00:06:44,890
Gary, can we get that light back?
Sorry, let's move that light back.

154
00:06:46,400 --> 00:06:48,721
Can we get a couple of lights
for the Vice President?

155
00:06:48,800 --> 00:06:51,167
- Yeah, let me just pull that out of my ass.
- It's DC.

156
00:06:51,240 --> 00:06:53,402
You can find someone
willing to open their ass on a Sunday.

157
00:06:53,480 --> 00:06:54,891
Great. Good luck.

158
00:06:54,960 --> 00:06:56,007
CODY: Sound is speeding.

159
00:06:56,080 --> 00:06:58,560
Everyone is set and settled.
They look great.

160
00:06:58,640 --> 00:07:00,642
And rolling.

161
00:07:03,240 --> 00:07:05,049
Have you read Randall Howard's

162
00:07:05,120 --> 00:07:07,646
<i>Hearts of Power:
DC's Most Influential Couples?</i>

163
00:07:07,720 --> 00:07:10,849
Sadly, I don't have a lot
of time to read fiction.

164
00:07:10,920 --> 00:07:12,604
(BOTH LAUGH)

165
00:07:12,680 --> 00:07:15,411
JANET: Now, during the election, uh,

166
00:07:15,480 --> 00:07:17,721
- (CLEARS THROAT)
- there were reports of screaming matches

167
00:07:17,800 --> 00:07:20,121
with you and your ex-husband Andrew

168
00:07:20,200 --> 00:07:24,046
and suggestions that the smiles and shows
of affection were all faked for the camera.

169
00:07:24,120 --> 00:07:27,124
Was your friendship all for show?

170
00:07:27,200 --> 00:07:29,248
Absolutely not.

171
00:07:29,320 --> 00:07:32,403
Now, Andrew was
on the campaign trail with me,

172
00:07:32,480 --> 00:07:37,771
really, because he shared, and still
does share, um, my vision for America.

173
00:07:37,840 --> 00:07:39,760
CODY: Okay.
AMY: We'd like to reset for lighting.

174
00:07:39,800 --> 00:07:42,087
- We're gonna reset for lighting.
- Just a quick lighting reset.

175
00:07:42,160 --> 00:07:45,289
And, really, she can move on from Andrew.

176
00:07:45,400 --> 00:07:47,129
I mean, she can push as much as she likes,

177
00:07:47,200 --> 00:07:48,611
but you're just gonna get the same answer,
178
00:07:48,680 --> 00:07:50,330
- so...
- Mmm.

179
00:07:50,400 --> 00:07:51,925
Have you seen television news before?

180
00:07:52,000 --> 00:07:54,606
No, I am hoping to
get the box set for Christmas, though.

181
00:07:54,680 --> 00:07:56,330
- That's what it feels like.
- Mmm-hmm.

182
00:07:56,400 --> 00:07:57,845
- (CELL PHONE RINGING)
- What...

183
00:07:57,920 --> 00:07:59,490
- Excuse me.
- Okay.

184
00:07:59,560 --> 00:08:01,210
Yes?

185
00:08:01,720 --> 00:08:03,290
- What are you...
- Come here.

186
00:08:03,360 --> 00:08:05,681
- Why? Why are you calling me?
- Come here.

187
00:08:05,760 --> 00:08:10,004
Jesus, you might as well cut out eye holes
and peer through a fucking newspaper.

188
00:08:10,080 --> 00:08:11,445
What the fuck are you doing?

189
00:08:11,520 --> 00:08:13,090
- (SOFTLY) It's <i>Apocalypse</i> Now.
- (CELL PHONE BEEPS)

190
00:08:13,160 --> 00:08:15,367
There's an e-mail from
Andrew to a lobbyist.

191
00:08:15,440 --> 00:08:18,683
He's claiming super access to Selina.
He's bragging about it.

192
00:08:18,760 --> 00:08:20,967
- This?
- It's fucking Andrew, yeah.

193
00:08:21,040 --> 00:08:22,644
- Madam Vice President.
- Yes! Yes.

194
00:08:22,720 --> 00:08:25,769
Does your ex-husband Andrew
have any political aspirations?

195
00:08:25,840 --> 00:08:26,841
Oh, my goodness.

196
00:08:26,920 --> 00:08:28,445
(SOFTLY) We've got to tell her.
We've got to tell her.

197
00:08:28,520 --> 00:08:30,841
No, no, no, don't say anything to Selina.

198
00:08:30,920 --> 00:08:32,490
- Why?
- 'Cause Janet's right there.

199
00:08:32,560 --> 00:08:34,483
You don't think she's gonna notice
we're whispering in her ear?

200
00:08:34,560 --> 00:08:36,210
Then she gets on,
and she tells this dildo to look it up.

201
00:08:36,280 --> 00:08:38,009
- And then we have a fucking story.
- What's going on?

202
00:08:38,120 --> 00:08:41,249
- Andrew's fucking us again.
- He's screwed us in all known dimensions.

203
00:08:41,320 --> 00:08:43,049
- What's new?
- Another scandal.

204
00:08:43,120 --> 00:08:46,522
- Yeah, but this is fucking bad shit.
- He's political poison. He's political...

205
00:08:46,600 --> 00:08:48,443
- Hi, Andrew.
- Andrew.

206
00:08:48,520 --> 00:08:51,091
He's been in commercial real estate
his entire life.

207
00:08:51,160 --> 00:08:53,925
So there's no reason there would be...
Should be a crossover?

208
00:08:54,000 --> 00:08:59,291
Well, I certainly couldn't, you know,
answer that question, um, for him.

209
00:08:59,360 --> 00:09:03,968
Would it surprise you to learn that,
only moments ago, a blog has reported

210
00:09:04,040 --> 00:09:08,125
that your ex-husband promised a lobbyist
favorable access to your office?

211
00:09:10,640 --> 00:09:11,721
Um...

212
00:09:11,920 --> 00:09:14,082
It does exist in an actual e-mail

213
00:09:14,160 --> 00:09:16,242
- from your ex-husband.
- Oh.

214
00:09:16,320 --> 00:09:18,846
- I see. Okay.
- "Hi, Jim. Remember,

215
00:09:18,920 --> 00:09:23,050
"I have the Vice President's ear
and I can get all kinds of access to her."

216
00:09:23,120 --> 00:09:29,082
JANET: And then there's one of those winking
emoticons at the bottom there, so...

217
00:09:29,160 --> 00:09:31,680
Uh-huh. I'm guessing that
that was meant as some sort of a joke.

218
00:09:31,720 --> 00:09:37,727
You know, Andrew Meyer has no influence
whatsoever, um, over my decision-making.

219
00:09:37,800 --> 00:09:39,802
It's hard to believe
because you've just painted a picture

220
00:09:39,880 --> 00:09:43,009
of your relationship being very close,
extremely close.

221
00:09:43,080 --> 00:09:46,243
We're not telepathically linked.
He can't read my mind. (LAUGHS)

222
00:09:46,320 --> 00:09:49,881
AMY: Hey, that's our 15 minutes.
That's the 15-minute mark. Great. Great.

223
00:09:49,960 --> 00:09:52,964
Let's take a break. Let's take a break.

224
00:09:53,040 --> 00:09:55,088
- Oh!
'GOG!

225
00:09:55,160 --> 00:09:56,161
Okay.

226
00:09:56,280 --> 00:09:59,250
- AMY: Are you okay, Gary?
- Yeah, yeah, I'm good.
227
00:09:59,320 --> 00:10:00,924
Sorry, could I just adjust your radio mike?

228
00:10:01,000 --> 00:10:03,287
- I'm getting some static. Ow! Whoa!
- I got it.

229
00:10:03,360 --> 00:10:05,522
Okay, my ears are my livelihood.
You don't need to...

230
00:10:05,600 --> 00:10:07,125
Okay, I bet. All right.
Let's just back off.

231
00:10:07,200 --> 00:10:08,247
- Are you okay?
- Fine.

232
00:10:08,320 --> 00:10:11,369
I know that you want to
kill somebody right now.

233
00:10:11,440 --> 00:10:12,441
Yeah.

234
00:10:12,520 --> 00:10:14,443
But unfortunately,
it can't be anyone in the building.

235
00:10:14,520 --> 00:10:16,010
- Okay?
- Okay_

236
00:10:17,080 --> 00:10:21,244
When Selina told me who was gonna be
interviewing me, you couldn't keep me away.

237
00:10:21,320 --> 00:10:22,651
- (LAUGHS)
- Talk to you a little later on.

238
00:10:22,720 --> 00:10:24,609
- Wonderful. I look forward to it.
- I do, too.
239
00:10:24,680 --> 00:10:28,969
But, um, let's take you now
and get you all changed and fixed up.

240
00:10:29,040 --> 00:10:32,089
(LAUGHS) When we were married,
he took longer in the bathroom than I did.

241
00:10:32,200 --> 00:10:35,966
- That's not true. Why would you say that?
- Come on. Just get in here.

242
00:10:36,040 --> 00:10:38,247
- What the hell is this thing?
- That's a cable.

243
00:10:38,320 --> 00:10:39,970
- Oh, shit.
- There's a cable.

244
00:10:40,040 --> 00:10:43,761
- Listen to me. What were you thinking?
- What? It was a joke.

245
00:10:43,840 --> 00:10:49,131
Once again, Andrew, you have totally
lived down to my expectations.

246
00:10:49,200 --> 00:10:51,885
When I invited you here to the residence

247
00:10:51,960 --> 00:10:54,327
- to fuck me, I didn't mean this.
- Mmm-hmm.

248
00:10:54,400 --> 00:10:55,800
ANDREW: Aren't we using each other?

249
00:10:55,840 --> 00:10:59,003
- What are you talking about?
- Okay, I'll spell it out for you.

250
00:10:59,080 --> 00:11:03,130
How easy is it for the Vice President
of the United States of America

251
00:11:03,200 --> 00:11:05,328
to get some casual sex?

252
00:11:05,400 --> 00:11:08,290
I'm convenient. And, I know...

253
00:11:08,360 --> 00:11:10,647
SELINA: Let me tell you something.
That's right.

254
00:11:10,720 --> 00:11:12,529
- Mmm-hmm.
- I am the Vice President of the United States,

255
00:11:12,600 --> 00:11:17,322
and I choose now not to fuck you anymore.

256
00:11:17,400 --> 00:11:19,528
Time will tell.

257
00:11:19,600 --> 00:11:21,523
I've got to change.

258
00:11:21,600 --> 00:11:24,365
- Yeah, you look awful.
- You look wonderful.

259
00:11:24,440 --> 00:11:26,408
Stop it. (CLEARS THROAT)

260
00:11:26,480 --> 00:11:28,926
- He's gonna go just change.
- Wait, where's he going?

261
00:11:29,040 --> 00:11:31,122
- To get my stuff.
- In my bedroom.

262
00:11:31,200 --> 00:11:33,089
Oh, no. Uh-huh.

263
00:11:33,160 --> 00:11:34,685
Oh, Andrew's been Veep-fucking?

264
00:11:34,760 --> 00:11:35,886
You knew about this?
265
00:11:35,960 --> 00:11:38,645
Okay, this is a category five shit storm.

266
00:11:38,760 --> 00:11:41,206
She's over. She's done. I'm gone.

267
00:11:41,280 --> 00:11:47,049
Um, I'm wondering if we can get just a shot
of Andrew's entrance just for establishing.

268
00:11:47,120 --> 00:11:50,408
So you guys meet here, kiss, kiss, hi, hi.
It's a family getting together...

269
00:11:50,520 --> 00:11:53,808
No, no, no, I understand what an
entrance is and how to greet people.

270
00:11:53,880 --> 00:11:55,041
- I get that.
- That's great.

271
00:11:55,120 --> 00:11:56,400
- Okay.
- CODY: Oh, here he comes!

272
00:11:56,440 --> 00:11:58,204
AMY: No, no, no, wait, wait, wait.

273
00:11:58,320 --> 00:12:00,049
No, no, no, you're not gonna get this.

274
00:12:00,120 --> 00:12:01,645
I'm so sorry. We're not gonna do that.

275
00:12:01,720 --> 00:12:05,850
We don't have a front door in our attic like
in some sort of Dr. Seuss book or something.

276
00:12:05,920 --> 00:12:08,844
Sometimes filming these off-guarded
moments, things get a little tense.

277
00:12:08,920 --> 00:12:10,251
Well, no, it's not tense at all.
278
00:12:10,320 --> 00:12:12,368
We're having a great time
and I'm thrilled you guys are here,

279
00:12:12,440 --> 00:12:13,521
- but let's just do it the right way.
- Okay.

280
00:12:13,840 --> 00:12:15,285
- Andrew!
- Hi, Dad.

281
00:12:15,360 --> 00:12:17,522
How are you? Nice to see you. Excuse me.

282
00:12:17,600 --> 00:12:20,683
- How are you? Nice to see you.
- Nice to see you.

283
00:12:20,800 --> 00:12:22,564
- Dad.
- Hi. How are you?

284
00:12:22,640 --> 00:12:24,051
How often does this happen?

285
00:12:24,120 --> 00:12:25,770
- Oh, gosh.
- BOTH: Um...

286
00:12:25,840 --> 00:12:28,446
Once a week,
we get together for a gab and a gobble.

287
00:12:28,560 --> 00:12:31,450
Yeah, well, I mean, you know,
schedules permitting and stuff,

288
00:12:31,560 --> 00:12:36,726
because now I really consider myself to be
married to my vice presidential office.

289
00:12:36,800 --> 00:12:37,801
I mean, recently,

290
00:12:37,880 --> 00:12:42,090
Mary King and I were working
through the night to avoid this shutdown.

291
00:12:42,160 --> 00:12:45,164
And, of course, it wasn't avoided, sadly.

292
00:12:45,240 --> 00:12:48,562
Do you think you could have
worked a little harder on that? (LAUGHS)

293
00:12:48,640 --> 00:12:50,005
Well, we are working harder.

294
00:12:50,120 --> 00:12:53,966
- Um, it's frustrating, of course.
- Sure. To the American people it is.

295
00:12:54,040 --> 00:12:55,371
It's a very long process. And...

296
00:12:55,440 --> 00:12:58,284
- Knock, knock, J Rock is in the...
- Whoa, whoa, whoa...

297
00:12:58,360 --> 00:12:59,361
Ooh, ooh.

298
00:12:59,440 --> 00:13:02,011
We're in the middle of filming.
Oh, my goodness, Jonah.

299
00:13:02,080 --> 00:13:03,809
J Dog. J Dog.

300
00:13:03,880 --> 00:13:05,803
- SELINA: Howdy, handsome. How are you?
- How are you doing?

301
00:13:05,880 --> 00:13:07,769
- Hey, Jonah.
- Great to see you again.

302
00:13:07,840 --> 00:13:09,683
- God, you've grown up, huh?
- Huh. Oh.
303
00:13:09,760 --> 00:13:11,444
I had a great time at your birthday party,
by the way.

304
00:13:11,560 --> 00:13:12,561
That's great.

305
00:13:12,640 --> 00:13:14,130
- Great to see you.
- Hey, how's it hanging?

306
00:13:14,200 --> 00:13:18,330
Jonah is our...
Dear Jonah is, um, our White House liaison.

307
00:13:18,440 --> 00:13:20,488
Guilty.

308
00:13:20,560 --> 00:13:24,042
And he's one of the more colorful
characters in the West Wing.

309
00:13:24,120 --> 00:13:27,647
- I'll say. That was quite an entrance.
- Oh, thank you. I try to make a mark.

310
00:13:27,720 --> 00:13:30,680
I just want to say I'm a huge fan, by
the way. I love your work, genuinely.

311
00:13:30,720 --> 00:13:33,200
- Thank you.
- And, actually, I'm gonna give you my card

312
00:13:33,280 --> 00:13:37,080
just in case you ever need any sort of,
like, "inside the West Wing" kind of stuff.

313
00:13:37,160 --> 00:13:40,209
I do occasional media appearances.
I give great talking head.

314
00:13:40,280 --> 00:13:43,841
Jonah, to what may we owe this pleasure?

315
00:13:43,920 --> 00:13:45,490
Oh, I just got off the phone
with the White House,

316
00:13:45,560 --> 00:13:50,088
and in 15 minutes, POTUS is going to
announce that the shutdown is over.

317
00:13:51,360 --> 00:13:53,408
- Is that true?
- Isn't that great?

318
00:13:54,160 --> 00:13:55,685
- Isn't that great?
- Move in on her.

319
00:13:55,760 --> 00:14:00,209
Yeah, the Speaker, Senate Majority Leader,
and POTUS, they thrashed out a deal,

320
00:14:00,280 --> 00:14:03,170
- and we switched America back on.
- Uh-huh, yes.

321
00:14:03,240 --> 00:14:05,527
- Congratulations, Madam Vice President.
- Thank you.

322
00:14:05,600 --> 00:14:07,682
- (APPLAUSE)
- We did it. We did it. You did it.

323
00:14:07,760 --> 00:14:10,650
The resolution took less time
than you anticipated.

324
00:14:10,720 --> 00:14:14,042
Well, it took all the time
leading up to this time.

325
00:14:14,120 --> 00:14:17,522
- So you were expecting a solution today?
- Yes, I was, yes.

326
00:14:17,600 --> 00:14:20,922
And yet you said
it was going to be a long process.

327
00:14:21,000 --> 00:14:24,891
- And it was, yeah. It was.
- Were you involved in the...

328
00:14:24,960 --> 00:14:26,564
Janet, it's like when
you loosen a pickle jar

329
00:14:26,640 --> 00:14:28,210
and somebody comes by
and they just open it.

330
00:14:28,280 --> 00:14:30,806
- (LAUGHS)
- MIKE: This is the shutdown lid loosener.

331
00:14:30,880 --> 00:14:34,123
- The pickle jar loosener.
- (LAUGHS) I like it.

332
00:14:34,200 --> 00:14:37,204
No, but can you talk us through
the final agreement?

333
00:14:37,280 --> 00:14:39,886
I can... It's... You know, um...

334
00:14:39,960 --> 00:14:43,646
I can, and I also want to eat some lunch.

335
00:14:43,720 --> 00:14:45,643
- Are we hungry?
- Yeah.

336
00:14:45,720 --> 00:14:47,051
MIKE: Definitely.
AMY: Yeah, let's get some lunch.

337
00:14:47,120 --> 00:14:48,960
MIKE: That's a cut. Yeah,
I think that's a cut.

338
00:14:49,000 --> 00:14:50,445
AMY: Lunchtime.
MIKE: That's a cut.

339
00:14:50,520 --> 00:14:52,010
- Okay, she doesn't...
- Oh, my God, she didn't know.

340
00:14:52,120 --> 00:14:54,771
JANET: That reminded me why I got into
this business in the first place.

341
00:14:54,840 --> 00:14:56,960
- I am so attracted to you right now.
- (JANET LAUGHS)

342
00:14:57,600 --> 00:15:01,400
I think that I'd like to just sit back
and watch you all prepare this meal.

343
00:15:01,480 --> 00:15:02,561
Pretend I'm not here.

344
00:15:02,640 --> 00:15:04,244
- Mmm-hmm.
- I kind of want to be the fly on a wall.

345
00:15:04,320 --> 00:15:07,563
Oh, my God.
Andrew, that's getting everywhere.

346
00:15:07,640 --> 00:15:11,531
Um, I'm gonna get you a peeler, okay?

347
00:15:11,600 --> 00:15:14,683
- I don't need a peeler. Thank you.
- Yeah, you need a peeler.

348
00:15:14,760 --> 00:15:17,240
Actually... Actually, I don't.

349
00:15:17,320 --> 00:15:18,970
Where... I'm trying to remember where...

350
00:15:19,040 --> 00:15:21,247
You know how sometimes
you have something in your kitchen,

351
00:15:21,320 --> 00:15:23,448
you know where it is, and then all
of a sudden, you can't find it?
352
00:15:23,520 --> 00:15:24,965
And that is what's
happened to me right now.

353
00:15:25,040 --> 00:15:27,611
JANET: Well, you probably have so
much staff in and out of here that...

354
00:15:27,680 --> 00:15:31,207
No, no, no. I know this kitchen
like the back of my hand.

355
00:15:31,440 --> 00:15:35,923
- Oh, that's not it.
- Okay, I don't know where...

356
00:15:36,240 --> 00:15:37,924
- (UTENSILS CLATTER)
- (GROANS)

357
00:15:38,040 --> 00:15:39,371
This is maddening.

358
00:15:39,440 --> 00:15:41,647
Do you ever have this happen to you
where you're trying to...

359
00:15:41,720 --> 00:15:44,610
- I'm not here.
- SELINA: Okay, you're not here. I'm so sorry.

360
00:15:44,680 --> 00:15:46,887
I'm talking to myself.
Where are you, peeler?

361
00:15:46,960 --> 00:15:48,564
Okay, I got it.

362
00:15:48,640 --> 00:15:50,768
It was in with the napkins inexplicably.

363
00:15:50,840 --> 00:15:55,084
- Here you go. Use that for the carrots.
- Actually, I'm all done. I'm good.

364
00:15:55,160 --> 00:15:56,161
Okay.

365
00:15:56,240 --> 00:15:59,926
Tell me, don't you normally
have staff to cater for you?

366
00:16:00,000 --> 00:16:01,000
Yeah, definitely.

367
00:16:01,040 --> 00:16:03,771
Well, sure,
but I just love banging the pots around.

368
00:16:03,840 --> 00:16:06,491
And I think you would
say that I'm a foodie.

369
00:16:06,560 --> 00:16:10,645
So, just to flag with you,
Andrew's obviously off the table.

370
00:16:10,720 --> 00:16:14,202
(LAUGHS) Well, technically,
he's very much at the table currently.

371
00:16:14,280 --> 00:16:15,327
JANET: What's on the menu?

372
00:16:15,400 --> 00:16:19,962
SELINA: Herb roasted chicken
and some arugula salad.

373
00:16:20,080 --> 00:16:22,321
JANET: Catherine,
do you enjoy your folks' cooking?

374
00:16:22,400 --> 00:16:24,801
Yeah, I love the way
that they cook the vegetables.

375
00:16:24,920 --> 00:16:25,920
Mmm.

376
00:16:25,960 --> 00:16:27,371
The vegetables are always my favorite.

377
00:16:27,440 --> 00:16:30,250
I just love vegetables so much.

378
00:16:30,320 --> 00:16:33,130
- Are you working for the vegetable lobby?
- (ALL LAUGH)

379
00:16:33,200 --> 00:16:34,850
I'll be right back.
I just have to grab something.

380
00:16:34,920 --> 00:16:36,160
Okay, darling.

381
00:16:36,240 --> 00:16:37,321
SELINA: Please, can you use the peeler?

382
00:16:37,400 --> 00:16:38,925
- ANDREW: I'm all done with the carrots.
- Oh, my God.

383
00:16:39,000 --> 00:16:41,002
- SELINA: No, you're not.
- That's all the carrots we're gonna use.

384
00:16:41,080 --> 00:16:43,367
I realize there are more carrots.

385
00:16:43,480 --> 00:16:45,130
We don't need any more.

386
00:16:45,200 --> 00:16:48,363
(STAMMERING) The Get Moving campaign,

387
00:16:48,440 --> 00:16:50,522
- which as you know I spearheaded.
- Yes.

388
00:16:50,600 --> 00:16:55,447
Um, as I launched that campaign,
I discovered a local organic butcher.

389
00:16:55,520 --> 00:16:57,170
- Hmm.
- And...

390
00:16:57,920 --> 00:17:03,484
Um, he does a lot of, um, grass-fed...

391
00:17:03,560 --> 00:17:07,884
- Grass-fed cattle and free-range chickens.
- Yeah. Yeah.

392
00:17:07,960 --> 00:17:10,884
JAN ET: What's your favorite meal
that you can't wait to have?

393
00:17:10,960 --> 00:17:12,200
CATHERINE: I really...

394
00:17:12,280 --> 00:17:18,640
I love the roasted Brussels sprouts
that my mom and dad make.

395
00:17:20,680 --> 00:17:21,761
Yep.

396
00:17:22,800 --> 00:17:24,564
Okay, well, they're taking a break,

397
00:17:24,640 --> 00:17:27,883
so this gives us a chance to come in here,
have a little chat.

398
00:17:27,960 --> 00:17:29,883
You never told me that
you were a vegetarian.

399
00:17:29,960 --> 00:17:32,281
- I told you three months ago.
- No, you didn't, Catherine.

400
00:17:32,360 --> 00:17:33,361
What?

401
00:17:33,440 --> 00:17:35,727
Uh, now that she mentions it,
I think it does sound familiar.

402
00:17:35,800 --> 00:17:37,564
Completely useless. You know what?

403
00:17:37,640 --> 00:17:40,600
Just because he's a liability doesn't
mean you have to be a liability, too.

404
00:17:40,640 --> 00:17:42,563
Now I'm gonna tell you something.
You're eating that chicken.

405
00:17:42,640 --> 00:17:44,563
I am not gonna do it.
I'm a vegetarian, Mom.

406
00:17:44,640 --> 00:17:48,690
You swallowed chicken your entire life.
(SOFTLY) You're gonna do it again today.

407
00:17:48,760 --> 00:17:50,922
I swallowed your bullshit my entire life.

408
00:17:51,000 --> 00:17:53,367
Okay, look, little lady,
we don't talk to your mother like that.

409
00:17:53,440 --> 00:17:54,930
All right, I'm just... God damn it.

410
00:17:55,000 --> 00:17:57,162
SELINA: Could you...
AMY: Yes, yes, yes.

411
00:17:57,760 --> 00:18:00,240
You know when you're 12
and you just get rid of it?

412
00:18:00,320 --> 00:18:02,084
Mmm, no. Speak for yourself.

413
00:18:02,160 --> 00:18:06,085
It's gonna look really bad for your morn if she
doesn't know that you're a vegetarian on TV.

414
00:18:06,160 --> 00:18:09,243
I'm not gonna sacrifice my morals
for her career anymore.

415
00:18:09,680 --> 00:18:12,081
I've done that. It's not that bad.
416
00:18:12,240 --> 00:18:15,483
Well, doesn't that chicken
look just amazing, Catherine?

417
00:18:15,560 --> 00:18:17,562
- It looks delicious.
- Yeah.

418
00:18:17,640 --> 00:18:19,244
I love it when Dad cooks.

419
00:18:19,320 --> 00:18:21,560
- JANET: A man of hidden talents.
- I don't like to brag.

420
00:18:21,600 --> 00:18:23,170
JANET: Not about cooking, anyway.

421
00:18:23,240 --> 00:18:26,449
- Okay, babe, here you go. Eat that up.
- Wow.

422
00:18:26,520 --> 00:18:29,922
I just need to reiterate with you.
We have agreed on all of these topics.

423
00:18:30,000 --> 00:18:32,241
- Mmm-hmm.
- And the Andrew e-mail story was not agreed.

424
00:18:32,320 --> 00:18:34,129
Sweetheart, it's news. Okay?

425
00:18:34,200 --> 00:18:38,603
It happened today. it's new with an S
on it. That's just what news is, so...

426
00:18:38,720 --> 00:18:40,688
With all due respect, this is not news.

427
00:18:40,760 --> 00:18:42,091
This is The fucking Food Channel
you got here.

428
00:18:42,160 --> 00:18:44,766
Okay, well, with all due respect, fuck you.

429
00:18:44,840 --> 00:18:49,243
I own the edit on your shit-show politician
that you connected yourself to,

430
00:18:49,320 --> 00:18:50,651
not me, you little gremlin.

431
00:18:50,720 --> 00:18:53,200
JANET: And has it been
a happy divorce for you, Catherine?

432
00:18:53,280 --> 00:18:56,045
Mmm, yeah.

433
00:18:56,120 --> 00:18:59,203
I think knowing that my mom
had to be available 24 hours a day

434
00:18:59,280 --> 00:19:01,886
really taught me
not to be too demanding as a child.

435
00:19:01,960 --> 00:19:03,485
SELINA: Well, that's true.

436
00:19:03,560 --> 00:19:06,643
JANET: So you don't feel parentally
shortchanged, then, do you, Catherine?

437
00:19:06,720 --> 00:19:08,006
No, um...

438
00:19:08,080 --> 00:19:12,324
I'm actually a big music fan, so I usually
try to explain my parents in terms of music.

439
00:19:12,400 --> 00:19:16,007
You know, musicians sometimes are better
in bands, or sometimes better solo.

440
00:19:16,080 --> 00:19:17,320
JANET: That's interesting.

441
00:19:17,400 --> 00:19:22,486
They're like the Beatles, you know, better
as a band, or Michael Jackson, better solo.

442
00:19:22,960 --> 00:19:26,203
- Although not a great parent, admittedly.
- (CHUCKLES)

443
00:19:26,280 --> 00:19:28,567
Well, actually, he did
okay with his own kids.

444
00:19:28,640 --> 00:19:31,530
It's when other kids got involved
that it got real dicey.

445
00:19:31,600 --> 00:19:34,843
But, no, then he did
dangle that one from a great height.

446
00:19:34,920 --> 00:19:37,605
- Right? Over that railing?
- (CLEARS THROAT)

447
00:19:38,040 --> 00:19:39,690
You know, you cross me on this,

448
00:19:39,760 --> 00:19:42,286
and you're never, ever
gonna get the Veep on camera again.

449
00:19:42,360 --> 00:19:45,045
Why the fuck... Mmm.
Why are you still talking to me, huh?

450
00:19:45,160 --> 00:19:47,970
If you'd just let someone get close enough
to fuck some sunshine into you,

451
00:19:48,080 --> 00:19:49,206
you'd shut your mouth!

452
00:19:49,280 --> 00:19:50,770
- You... You...
- Okay, okay.

453
00:19:50,840 --> 00:19:54,162
You do not know anything about me.
You think that this is easy, what I do?

454
00:19:54,240 --> 00:19:57,369
Yeah, having 10,000 interests
screaming in your fucking face

455
00:19:57,440 --> 00:20:00,489
the way that I am screaming
in your face right now all day, every day?

456
00:20:00,560 --> 00:20:02,722
- I am fucking good at this.
- Can we just put a filter...

457
00:20:02,800 --> 00:20:04,689
- Are you? This is good?
- Fuck your face, Gary.

458
00:20:04,760 --> 00:20:07,206
- She's good at this, you guys. Sorry.
- Fuck my face. You hear that?

459
00:20:07,280 --> 00:20:09,328
Antique windows. Bring it down.

460
00:20:09,400 --> 00:20:11,562
- What the fuck just happened?
- Antique windows. Bring it down.

461
00:20:11,640 --> 00:20:13,881
Amy, let's go find your dignity over here,
okay?

462
00:20:13,960 --> 00:20:16,088
Get her out of here. Fucking amateur.

463
00:20:16,160 --> 00:20:18,162
- All right. All right.
- Hey, no, no, no.

464
00:20:18,240 --> 00:20:20,561
- No, seriously...
- No. Okay. Whoa.

465
00:20:20,640 --> 00:20:23,723
Okay, listen, you need to calm down.
466
00:20:23,800 --> 00:20:26,326
At least I am giving a shit.
You are flatlining all day.

467
00:20:26,400 --> 00:20:29,802
Okay, okay.
But has she been impressive at all today?

468
00:20:29,880 --> 00:20:31,803
Look, I've graphed her performance, okay?

469
00:20:31,880 --> 00:20:35,202
Look at this. Look at this nice little graphic.
Here's time. Here's her fucking career.

470
00:20:35,280 --> 00:20:36,327
(WHISTLES)

471
00:20:36,400 --> 00:20:37,606
Now maybe there should be a little uptick

472
00:20:37,680 --> 00:20:40,160
because she didn't barf
her food all over the table, I don't know.

473
00:20:40,240 --> 00:20:42,242
So if she doesn't
turn this fucking shit-show around,

474
00:20:42,320 --> 00:20:44,004
guess what,
I don't know which way I'm gonna bounce.

475
00:20:44,120 --> 00:20:48,125
Amy, when my memaw
used to find herself getting snappy,

476
00:20:48,200 --> 00:20:50,089
she would sing her favorite song.

477
00:20:50,160 --> 00:20:53,369
<i>I wish I were in the land of cotton
Old times there were not forgotten</i>

478
00:20:53,480 --> 00:20:54,527
(AMY SIGHS)
479
00:20:54,600 --> 00:20:57,206
<i>Look away! Look away!</i>

480
00:20:57,280 --> 00:20:59,567
No, guys, please.

481
00:20:59,640 --> 00:21:01,369
Favorite family vacation?

482
00:21:01,440 --> 00:21:03,044
- White water rafting.
- Italy.

483
00:21:03,120 --> 00:21:04,690
Mmm, Disneyland.

484
00:21:04,760 --> 00:21:05,761
Which is it?

485
00:21:05,840 --> 00:21:08,241
No, honey, we didn't ever go to Disneyland.

486
00:21:08,320 --> 00:21:11,802
Oh, no, you didn't take me.
Rosa took me with her family.

487
00:21:11,880 --> 00:21:13,006
- Who's Rosa?
- Um...

488
00:21:13,080 --> 00:21:14,570
- She was a...
- She was...

489
00:21:14,640 --> 00:21:16,210
- Housekeeper.
- Housekeeper, that's right.

490
00:21:16,280 --> 00:21:17,964
You spent a lot of time
with your housekeeper?

491
00:21:18,040 --> 00:21:19,963
Yeah, she was like a...
492
00:21:20,040 --> 00:21:21,326
We did go to India.

493
00:21:21,520 --> 00:21:23,602
- Mmm.
- Lndia was awful.

494
00:21:23,680 --> 00:21:25,603
I don't know why
you didn't give me this earlier.

495
00:21:25,720 --> 00:21:28,041
Oh, I didn't want to give it to you
before your interview.

496
00:21:28,120 --> 00:21:30,202
- God, you don't want any water?
- No, I've gotten good at it.

497
00:21:30,280 --> 00:21:32,931
Look at this. I was supposed
to be stressing my successes.

498
00:21:33,000 --> 00:21:35,287
Instead I'm sitting there
stuffing my face with chicken.

499
00:21:35,360 --> 00:21:38,204
Great stuff in there, guys.
Good stuff. Thumbs up.

500
00:21:38,280 --> 00:21:39,486
Andrew looks great on camera.

501
00:21:39,560 --> 00:21:40,925
- Get off my stairs, Jonah.
- Oh, yes, ma'am.

502
00:21:41,000 --> 00:21:42,001
- Ma'am.
- What?

503
00:21:42,080 --> 00:21:43,889
I need to give you
some straight talk right now, okay?

504
00:21:43,960 --> 00:21:46,611
All of your worst fears about
how this day could have possibly gone...

505
00:21:46,680 --> 00:21:48,205
- Yeah?
- Have come true.

506
00:21:48,280 --> 00:21:50,000
- Oh, my gosh.
- No, no, up here. Look at me.

507
00:21:50,040 --> 00:21:51,371
- You want to own this interview?
- Yeah.

508
00:21:51,440 --> 00:21:52,805
- Say it.
- I want to own it.

509
00:21:52,880 --> 00:21:53,881
All right. Here's what you're gonna do.

510
00:21:54,000 --> 00:21:56,321
You're gonna do something big.
You're gonna do something bold.

511
00:21:56,400 --> 00:21:58,129
And you're gonna do it
in the next five minutes.

512
00:21:58,200 --> 00:21:59,200
How about this?

513
00:21:59,240 --> 00:22:01,607
How about I lift up my dress,
give everyone a big fat shot of my cooch?

514
00:22:01,680 --> 00:22:04,126
- Jesus Christ.
- Everything okay up there?

515
00:22:04,200 --> 00:22:06,441
- All right. You need more pep talk?
- No, let's do it.

516
00:22:06,520 --> 00:22:08,204
- Did he just hear that?
- Nope.

517
00:22:08,280 --> 00:22:11,682
- Use the Force, ma'am.
- I don't even know what that means.

518
00:22:11,760 --> 00:22:14,809
Big and bold. What do you mean?
Like, a medley from Okla-fucking-homa?

519
00:22:14,880 --> 00:22:16,120
Look, I tried to wake her up, okay?

520
00:22:16,200 --> 00:22:18,202
I have no choice
but to be the fucking curveball.

521
00:22:20,480 --> 00:22:22,721
- (CLEARS THROAT)
- Fantastic. Okay.

522
00:22:24,680 --> 00:22:27,081
CODY: Let's roll cameras. Sound.

523
00:22:28,880 --> 00:22:33,727
So, what a lovely afternoon I have gotten
to spend with the Second Family.

524
00:22:33,800 --> 00:22:35,040
How about that? Yeah.

525
00:22:35,120 --> 00:22:39,444
And, Catherine, would you vote for your
parents to get back together again?

526
00:22:39,520 --> 00:22:40,521
No, no, no. This way,

527
00:22:40,600 --> 00:22:43,001
I get a Christmas and a birthday present
off of each of them.

528
00:22:43,080 --> 00:22:44,366
(ALL CHUCKLE)

529
00:22:44,680 --> 00:22:48,765
Catherine, how does all this affect
how you approach relationships?

530
00:22:48,840 --> 00:22:51,730
Not terribly much.
I'm in a very different phase of my life.

531
00:22:51,800 --> 00:22:56,203
You know, my boyfriend and I are very young
and not really talking about marriage.

532
00:22:56,280 --> 00:22:58,248
And this would be Rahim?

533
00:23:00,280 --> 00:23:01,566
Yes.

534
00:23:01,640 --> 00:23:05,201
JANET: That is an interesting name.
Is that Indian?

535
00:23:05,320 --> 00:23:07,448
- It's Iranian.
- JAN ET: Iranian?

536
00:23:07,520 --> 00:23:11,081
It's second generation American Persian.

537
00:23:11,200 --> 00:23:13,043
Calling Tel Aviv now.

538
00:23:13,160 --> 00:23:16,881
- And has he been welcomed into your home?
- No.

539
00:23:16,960 --> 00:23:18,644
Only because it's just...

540
00:23:18,760 --> 00:23:22,242
It's a casual thing, and
it's actually ended.

541
00:23:22,320 --> 00:23:25,244
- Really? I'm sorry to hear that, honey.
- CATHERINE: That's okay.
542
00:23:25,320 --> 00:23:28,244
Speaking of relationships,
Andrew, I'm sorry,

543
00:23:28,320 --> 00:23:31,767
I simply have to ask you about
your relationship with lobbyist Jim Melita

544
00:23:31,840 --> 00:23:36,129
and the implication that you offered
access to the Vice President.

545
00:23:36,200 --> 00:23:39,249
Yeah, um, it's, um...

546
00:23:40,640 --> 00:23:42,085
In aword...

547
00:23:44,160 --> 00:23:46,242
Come on. Uh...

548
00:23:46,880 --> 00:23:51,363
Perhaps, it's possible
that I have overplayed my hand.

549
00:23:52,840 --> 00:23:59,086
Well, I think it's safe to say that Andrew
overreached and just said something silly.

550
00:23:59,160 --> 00:24:00,366
Yeah.

551
00:24:00,440 --> 00:24:05,082
I suppose that the Vice President
would also agree that

552
00:24:05,160 --> 00:24:08,926
when she said she was in the loop
over national security,

553
00:24:09,000 --> 00:24:11,890
that also may have been
a bit of an exaggeration.

554
00:24:13,600 --> 00:24:17,047
I'm actually not sure
that those two situations are comparable.

555
00:24:17,160 --> 00:24:18,491
I believe that they are.

556
00:24:18,600 --> 00:24:24,323
And insomuch as you refuse to comment on the
spy allegations or the hostage situation

557
00:24:24,440 --> 00:24:26,283
until the investigation is complete,

558
00:24:26,400 --> 00:24:28,482
I, too, would like to refrain

559
00:24:28,560 --> 00:24:33,646
until I find outjust exactly what it is
I'm accused of having said or not said.

560
00:24:33,720 --> 00:24:36,166
You do understand that sounds like

561
00:24:36,240 --> 00:24:40,564
you're playing for time
and actually are hiding something?

562
00:24:42,720 --> 00:24:44,643
I'm sorry,
was that a question for me or Selina?

563
00:24:44,720 --> 00:24:46,529
I think that question is for me.

564
00:24:48,600 --> 00:24:50,728
I want to talk about the spy.

565
00:24:50,840 --> 00:24:52,604
The CIA operative.

566
00:24:52,720 --> 00:24:54,609
- No, no.
- Yeah, yeah.

567
00:24:54,720 --> 00:24:56,449
There was a miscommunication
568
00:24:56,520 --> 00:25:00,684
for which I want to apologize
on behalf of the administration.

569
00:25:00,760 --> 00:25:07,530
You know, the intention was never to mislead
the American people, but that was its effect.

570
00:25:07,600 --> 00:25:10,922
- Shit.
- SELINA: And for that, I really am truly sorry.

571
00:25:11,000 --> 00:25:15,369
But I am saying that
I had full knowledge of the spy's status.

572
00:25:15,440 --> 00:25:17,522
- But she didn't.
- I know.

573
00:25:17,600 --> 00:25:18,806
Madam Vice President,

574
00:25:18,880 --> 00:25:20,564
- this is quite an admission.
- Mmm-hmm.

575
00:25:20,640 --> 00:25:26,249
I have taken on a role now,
an important role in national security,

576
00:25:26,320 --> 00:25:30,325
and I take great pride
in that responsibility.

577
00:25:30,400 --> 00:25:33,324
Now, sometimes you have to act.

578
00:25:33,400 --> 00:25:34,925
Always you have to listen.

579
00:25:35,400 --> 00:25:38,483
Because in politics,

580
00:25:38,560 --> 00:25:41,404
a backbone and a heart
581
00:25:43,000 --> 00:25:46,288
are only as good as your ears.

582
00:25:49,480 --> 00:25:52,324
And my ears are my livelihood.

583
00:25:52,400 --> 00:25:54,482
CODY: Okay, that's our segment, guys.

584
00:25:54,560 --> 00:25:57,040
- (APPLAUSE)
- That's it. Great. Good. Okay.

585
00:25:57,120 --> 00:25:58,167
That's good.

586
00:25:58,480 --> 00:26:01,643
Madam Vice President,
that was an amazing interview.

587
00:26:01,720 --> 00:26:02,760
Well, thank you very much.

588
00:26:02,800 --> 00:26:06,200
You're gonna take the spotlight back from the
end of the shutdown, I'll tell you that.

589
00:26:06,240 --> 00:26:08,083
- We'll see.
- Best of luck, Andrew.

590
00:26:08,160 --> 00:26:10,288
- Good to meet you.
- Good luck with all the, mmm...

591
00:26:10,360 --> 00:26:12,522
ANDREW: Way to go, Team Meyer.

592
00:26:12,600 --> 00:26:15,206
(LAUGH) How about it? Right?
Congratulations.

593
00:26:15,320 --> 00:26:17,891
Honestly, that was...
That was something else, Mom.
594
00:26:17,960 --> 00:26:21,089
I'm really sorry that I brought up Rahim.
I know you didn't want me to do that.

595
00:26:21,160 --> 00:26:23,401
SELINA: You know what?
I'm sorry you had to dump him on the air.

596
00:26:23,480 --> 00:26:24,641
Notes about the interview.

597
00:26:24,720 --> 00:26:26,290
Just want to help you
keep an eye out for those.

598
00:26:26,360 --> 00:26:27,771
- Get out of here.
- How are you doing?

599
00:26:27,840 --> 00:26:30,684
I spewed out so much bullshit,
I'm gonna need a mint.

600
00:26:30,760 --> 00:26:31,761
A fucking mint.

601
00:26:31,840 --> 00:26:34,400
- Do you want a mint? I'll get you a mint.
- No, I don't mean it.

602
00:26:34,840 --> 00:26:37,605
I'm just gonna head back.
If anybody needs me... West Wing.

603
00:26:37,680 --> 00:26:39,967
- No one does, Jonah.
- No one needs you, Jonah.

604
00:26:40,040 --> 00:26:41,451
- S E Ll NA: Amy.
- Yes, ma'am?

605
00:26:41,520 --> 00:26:42,521
(DOOR CLOSES)

606
00:26:42,600 --> 00:26:44,602
- Did Andrew leave?
- He's gone.

607
00:26:44,680 --> 00:26:46,045
Can you see if he's still out there?

608
00:26:46,120 --> 00:26:49,408
- He just left a jacket.
- Oh, yourjacket is up here.

609
00:26:49,480 --> 00:26:51,960
- His jacket.
<i>- I'll</i> wait here?

610
00:26:52,040 --> 00:26:54,407
- Ma'am, do you need...
- SELINA: No, it's fine.

611
00:26:54,480 --> 00:26:56,767
I know where his stuff is.

612
00:26:56,840 --> 00:26:58,410
Are they gonna...

613
00:26:58,480 --> 00:27:00,403
It's like a victory fuck?

614
00:27:00,480 --> 00:27:02,005
He better come down.

615
00:27:02,080 --> 00:27:05,163
Is he coming back down?
Do we need to wait for him?

616
00:27:05,240 --> 00:27:06,765
SELINA: We got it.
ANDREW: We're good.

617
00:27:07,240 --> 00:27:08,969
Okay.

618
00:27:09,520 --> 00:27:11,409
CATHERINE: Where are my parents?

619
00:27:11,480 --> 00:27:12,845
Um...

620
00:27:12,920 --> 00:27:14,126
Did my dad leave?

621
00:27:14,200 --> 00:27:17,921
- They're having... They're having a talk.
- They're having a talk upstairs.

622
00:27:18,000 --> 00:27:19,445
A talk upstairs?

623
00:27:19,520 --> 00:27:22,251
- They might be getting you something.
- Oh, Jesus Christ.