Running head: BLOOMING ON 1

Blooming On:

Where I Came From and Where I Am Going

Marissa K. Lambert

Azusa Pacific University

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Personal Growth

Having attended Azusa Pacific University (APU) to further my education in the area of

special education and learning and technology, I grew in ways that I could never have imagined.

At APU I completed many different courses that helped me to develop immensely, I have

reflected on these classed on Appendix A. My faith has been strengthened enabling me to deal

with the various struggles I have faced during this program. I have grown to be more adaptable;

listening when others are speaking and not thinking that what I say is most important. I am my

own most prominent critic. I believe that I cannot do much right, but through my newfound

confidence, I have grown to accept and listen to other’s criticism without taking it too personally.

My faith has strengthened in abundance because if I did not have my faith, I would have

never gotten through my Masters of Arts in Education: Learning and Technology (LRNT). God

has been my true guiding light through this whole experience. He has shown me exactly which

direction to go, and He’s given me the strength and ability to be successful on this path. I know

that God himself picked me to be a teacher; I have witnessed Him working through every step I

have taken. I have cried to Him through prayer, calling out His name, asking Him to help give

me the strength and wisdom to make the right decisions. He has also given me the ability to deal

with emotions, which is something that I have struggled with my entire life.

At APU I have studied my strengths through a book called ​StrengthsFinder 2.0.​ We took

an assessment to find out what our strengths were. I learned that my number one strength is

adaptability. After discovering this, I have worked to nurture my strength. I fly by the seat of my

pants and expect for plans to have sudden detours or requests (Rath, 2007). I have also grown to

be much quieter; I used to have to always talk, and my opinion had to be heard. It was through
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learning and talking to other teachers and educators that I started to keep quiet and learn by

listening to other people's opinions and experiences.

While growing up, I was never a patient person. I wanted what I wanted immediately. I

believed that everyone was going to do what I wanted at any given time. It has been through the

LRNT program that I have displayed an amount of patience that has even surprised me. I have

also increased my self-confidence. Many of my professors have been encouraging of my work. I

see myself exactly as the person I want and need to be.

At APU I have grown and changed in more ways than I could have imagined personally.

I have grown to depend on my faith to get me through the day to day situations through prayer

and guidance from God. I have become more adaptable in all cases in life, including staying

quiet and learning from others. I have grown to be more confident of myself, believing in what I

can do and allowing myself to grow with others help.

Professional Growth

Amidst my professional journey, I have grown and blossomed. I view many of the areas

that I have developed professionally as wins for my students. The professional maturity I’m most

proud of is my ability to communicate my passion for teaching special education and the

importance of educating others about the gift that special needs students bring. I also recognize

that the relationships that you build with your students help you to gain production from them.

Strengthening my skills in making parents feel more comfortable when given difficult news is

another growth I have achieved. They understand that I do care for their child and want what is

best for them.

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Through my entire life, I have enjoyed working with this unique population. I can not

grasp why people treat special needs children poorly. I want to educate the world about how

gifted these children are. Some special needs students “... have been in the hands of other people,

and it did not feel like being loved. More often it felt like rejection, if not downright abuse”

(Reinders, 2011, para. 3). Educating general education teachers about how these students want to

feel included and loved is an essential work of a special education teacher. General education

teachers need to see these children as gifts, as people that grow and learn just a bit differently.

Having a relationship with students is more crucial than some teacher candidates believe.

Relationships cannot be taught. Teachers are shown how to give a direct lesson through

observation and practice, but to illustrate relationships is uncommon. I communicate with my

students. This method helps me to push them to their full potential. Having a relationship with

my students allows me to treat them as an individual. They feel more comfortable with me, and

listen to what I say.

Working in special education (SPED) I knew that I would encounter parents often.

Interacting with parents scared me at first. I realized I have the skill of making people

comfortable. When I had to say something to a parent, I have lost sleep and had terrible stomach

issues. When breaking difficult news to parents, I was able to make parents feel comfortable, by

merely telling them the facts. Parents can see that I want what is best for their child through the

actions I take and how I respect their child.

Throughout my entire professional growth journey, I have matured in areas that I feel are

important. These areas may not be seen as necessary to all educators, but for me, they are the

reasons that people trust my opinion and believe in my ability. I can help them feel calm and
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convey what I am doing is best for their student. Gaining students’ trust will allow me to expect

more from them, producing because I believe in them. Working toward gaining general

education teachers’ understanding is probably a challenging part of my professional growth.

When I obtain general education teachers’ understanding and willingness to try, everyone is

capable of moving mountains.

Technical Growth

Throughout the LRNT program, I have grown in many different technical areas. I grew in

how I view technology in the classroom and also in applications that I use. I saw the most

significant personal growth in my perspective on how technology is used in schools. I obtained

data collection techniques that can direct my teaching to the specific needs of my students. The

area I developed the most in was my perspective on the potential use of technology in the

classroom.

Before I started teaching in my classroom, I experienced technology being used and

abused by the teachers. Teachers were placing students on different forms of technology for

extended periods of time throughout the day and not teaching the students anything themselves.

Seeing this caused me to develop a disdain for technology in schools. Teachers’ abuse of

technology was a sizable reason that I chose to get the LRNT Masters. Working in special

education, I have students that are at different learning levels. My University mentor, Carleen

Maurer stated: “technology allows students to learn and develop in areas that a teacher can not

reach because each student needs something different than another” (C. Maurer, personal

communication, October 2, 2018). Studying different programs and allowing my students to use

various programs, I discovered that technology could make learning fun and students can learn
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information that previously was difficult for them to grasp.

As a SPED teacher, collecting data has always been a huge stressor. Communicating with

other teachers and researching different technological programs, I found ways to collect data for

my students’ goals. Many applications have an adaptive feature, meeting students where they are

and slowly helping them grow. Data collection provides teachers with the materials to know

precisely where a student is working and help them to achieve their goals. That data can then be

used to help guide your instruction. I have my students complete these assessments and then base

some of my curriculum on the data collected. One particular program I use has students use a

computer component and a direct teaching component. The program has helped several of my

students improve their reading comprehension. One of my students has grown over two years in

reading comprehension since the beginning of the school year. I also base my teaching off where

a group of students understanding is. My students use adaptive programs to help fill in the gaps

of the foundational information they need to understand further.

When I started the LRNT program, I assumed that I would be learning about how

different technology works within the school system. I did not think that I would completely

change my perspective of technology use in schools. I now see that technology is used to help

students grow in areas that sometimes teachers cannot reach them. Another way that I gained

perspective is how technology collects information that can be used to help teachers better teach

all students.

Life Long Learning Plan

❏ I will attend Special Education Conferences, ones that will further explain special

education law.
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❏ I will attend every training possible through my school district that will give me further

knowledge on classroom management, for example, attending Love and Logic.

❏ I will communicate with the seasoned teachers within my district to further my

knowledge in what they have experienced and what I should experience.

❏ I belong to Special Education teacher groups on social media where I can ask questions

and obtain answers from teachers and administration in the field.

❏ I will complete the online training to become a Google Certified teacher.

❏ I will attend online conferences, for example, CUE Craft #DitchSummit

Conclusion

The LRNT program has been a tremendous growing experience. There have been many

highs and an abundance of lows, but through all of those difficulties and triumphs, I have

become the teacher that I hope God intended me to be. I know for a fact that my faith is the only

way that I have been successful through this process, God has given challenges that I never

imagined. There were many times I wanted to quit, but through the whole journey reminded

myself that I was not alone and that my Savior was my biggest cheerleader. Knowing that to be

true, I was able to fight through until the end.

Along with the hard parts, came the joys, the little things, it was realizing that I could use

technology in my classroom to build my students knowledge and confidence that sold me on

using it. It was seeing my students excited about reading when before they would do everything

in their power to detour from having even to try. Throughout this program, both my students and

I grew in ways that strengthened us.

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Appendix A

History of Coursework

Course # Term Instructor Key Learning Reflections

SPED 535 Summer 2 James Saunders I learned what was expected of me in
2016 Graduate school. The first time that I heard
of the Co-teaching model, meaning when a
special education (SPED) and a general
education teacher work together in the
same classroom.
SPED 508 Summer 2 Stephen Diephouse I learned what resources are available for
2016 special needs children after high school.
Some programs will both help them further
their education and programs that will help
prepare to work in society.
TESP 506 Fall 1 2016 Catherine Hahs Brinkley I learned that students need to be working
at all times. There should be little to no
downtime. I also learned that classroom
management is one of the most important
parts of teaching.
TESP 516 Fall 1 2016 Catherine Hahs Brinkley I learned how to better understand phonics
and how to pass my ​Reading Instruction
Competence Assessment ​(RICA).
TESP 556 Fall 2 2016 Catherine Hahs Brinkley I learned that frequently SPED students
and English Learners (EL) benefit from
similar teaching strategies, for example,
visuals, and other ​specially designed
academic instruction in English ​(SDAIE)
strategies.
SPED 530 Fall 2 2016 Melody McHaffie I learned that my number one strength is
adaptability. ​This strength allows me to
adapt to whatever my students need. If
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there is an issue, I can change the way I’m

doing things to help work for my students.
SPED 566 A&B Fall 1&2 Gregory Richardson I experienced what different grade levels
2016 and ability levels of a special education
classroom look like and how those
classrooms function.
SPED 540 Spring 1 Gregory Richardson I learned about what math resources are
2017 available for students on IEPs and how to
adapt the curriculum to better support those
students needs.
SPED 533 Spring 1 Gregory Richardson I learned how to give assessments to
2017 students that are either on Individualized
Education Plans (IEPs) or being tested to
be put on an IEP.
SPED 541 Spring 2 James Saunders I learned that a Behavioral Intervention
2017 Plan (BIP) is not only about identifying
students behaviors but helping to support
and intervene said behaviors by teaching
target behaviors.
SPED 536 Spring 2 James Saunders I learned what the steps are in the
2017 Response to Intervention (RTI) model, ie.
Tier 1 and beyond and how to apply said
steps to both general education and special
education students.
SPED 501 Fall 1 2017 Tammy Bachrach I learned how to identify students strengths
and needs. How the curriculum can be
modified, and what instructional strategies
can be used to help meet each students
needs.
SPED 502 Fall 2 2017 Tammy Bachrach I learned how to write standard-based IEP
goals.
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EDUC 511 Spring 1 2018 Valarie Suffern I become more transparent in technology. I
stopped being afraid to ask questions. I
also learned about different technologies
that I had never experienced before, like
LiveBinders and Zoom.
EDUC 546 Spring 2 2018 Joseph Bruzzese I learned that technology could help not
only students but teachers. It allows
teachers to learn more about a content area
or subject and for them to become a
community helping to support one another.
EDTC 515 Summer 1 Timothy Holder I learned that the Darkside of the web is
2018 scarier than the public portrays it and that
we need to teach our students how to
protect themselves on the internet.
EDUC 547 Fall 1 2018 Jennifer Courduff I learned that Assistive Technology (AT) is
not just electronic devices, but any tool that
can help a student to learn better.
EDUC 549 Fall 2 2018 Kathleen Bacer I reflected on what I learned throughout my
entire Masters and Credential courses. I
learned about how I grew professionally,
personally and technologically and how I
can use this growth in my classroom and
throughout my entire life.
SPED 575 Fall 1&2 Angela Guta I further understood what it takes to be a
A&B 2018 caring and adequate teacher, through
mentorship from a seasoned special
education expert.
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References

Rath, T (2007). Adaptability. ​Strengthsfinder 2.0.​ New York: Gallup Press.

Reinders, H. (2011) The Power of Inclusion and Friendship. ​Journal of Religion,

Disability & Health.​ doi: 10.1080/15228967.2011.619341.