Transitions

Vikram Jandhyala Follow

Feb 28 · 3 min read

As human beings, we all go through multiple transitions in our lives.

Since I am personally going through a challenging one right now, I
thought I would share some thoughts.

Transitions, whether chosen or forced, are particularly difficult when

you are moving on from something you have put all your heart, soul,
belief, effort, and time into. It is doubly hard when it is not just you but
a dedicated, loving, high-functioning team who believes in a common
vision that has put in all that effort. People matter immensely.

For all who have gone through difficult transitions, these can serve as
crucibles. Self reflection at times of transition can be additionally
focused and energized through these crucibles.
Here’s my take on the personal front. It doesn’t have any business or
leadership wisdom, but is focused on personal insights which I believe
are relatively generalizable.

Love: Find people to love, do things you love. Create small

communities of people and work that engage you emotionally and fill
your soul and spirit. DO NOT spend time on things you do not love and
people who do not resonate with you. Be careful about scale that is
depersonalizing.

Uniqueness : Be part of groups and organizations that celebrate and

nurture your uniqueness. Stay away from those who do the opposite
and force conformity, regardless of what their public persona might
look like. Your uniqueness is what makes you a creative human being.

Happiness : This only comes from within. It is easier if you are doing
the other two things related to love and uniqueness. DO NOT try to get
happiness from external things, that will not only be fleeting but will
also be like an addictive drug with progressively increasing dosages
needed for the “high” and with only one undesirable final result.

The rest of life is just details—deadlines, commitments, ego

satisfaction, peer pressure, “shoulds” and “wants”!

Now all this advice isn’t for folks who have the triple of narcissism,
Machiavellianism, and psychopathy that seems to serve so many so
well in being in positions of influence in various organizations, which I
guess is more an issue with the systems that celebrate and encourage
this archetype than with these people. They dont need love,
uniqueness, or happiness, and are often fueled by insecurity, ego, fear,
jealousy and greed.

This is also not for those amazing hypersensitive, ultra-creative types

—how they are able to transform personal torment and pain into
something beautiful that benefits the world at large is incredible and
yet inexplicable. Somehow societal benefits and personal pain can
coexist in such tormented yet brilliant people.

It is for the rest—with some sense of conscience, some sensitivity, and

some desire to do good around us and also be supported or
acknowledged for it in some form.

Even my amazing young kids have internalized this message—they

repeat back what I told them “help people, keep learning, have fun”,
and now even at their tender ages have advanced this message to
“love, uniqueness, happiness”.

I wish I had had the opportunity to learn this early in my life. For those
with young children, I really encourage that you use this message for
your children—they will appreciate it and so will the world that they
end up creating and being part of.

So, back to transitions. Sometimes, to paraphrase (and misquote!) a

great role model and technology leader and friend I would have loved
to work for and with, it’s time to “hit reset”. And if that soft reset
doesn’t work, to turn the power off and back on and hopefully to see
something fresh and different.

Thank you to those whose advice, support, love, and efforts have
helped so much at these times. Love, uniqueness, happiness!