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Marriage and Family Customs
in Ancient Egypt:
An Interdisciplinary Study:
Part I
Panos D. Bardis
Professor of Sociology, The University of Toledo
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230 SOCIAL SCIENCE FOE OCTOBER 1966
classical and modern treatises in var- tians now call Nile" (V, v, 6). It is
ious branches of human knowledge. also
It true, however, that Homer spoke
is hoped that the present essay, being of the entire country as "Egypt." In
fairly inclusive and comprehensive, his Odyssey, for instance, when Anti-
will fill this lacuna. nous, Penelope's most monstrous sui-
tor, speaks to Odysseus, he refers to
A. The Land, Its Name, and Its Kings Egypt as a country, not as a river
It has been asserted that the first (XVII, 448).
name of Egypt was Ghemi or Kamit, Manetho (third century B.C.), the
which means "Black Earth."1 This Egyptian high priest of Heliopolis
name was employed in order to whodis-
wrote in Greek, further states
tinguish Egypt from the "red that Egypt was called Mestraim by
earth"
of Arabia, a country that lackedthe Hebrews: "Namque Aegyptus ab
a ben-
eficent river like the Nile. Indeed, Hebraeis
the Mestraimus appellatur"
"black earth" created by the river Nile
( Aegyptiaca , Fragment 1, 5) . This dou-
played such an important role ble in name,
the which is related to that em-
long history of Egypt that Herodotus
ployed by the Arabs, namely, Misrum,
probably referred to both Upper and
(484-424 B.C.), the great Greek histor-
ian, spoke of the country as the Lower
gift ofEgypt. In Genesis 10:6, the
the river. This famous phrase, sameofname is given as Misraim : "And
course, was borrowed from Hecataeus
the sons of Ham ; Cush, and Mizraim."
of Miletus (500 B.C.), another According
Greek to another theory, the city
historian.2 Regarding the same subject,
of Memphis owed its name to the an-
Jacques Besançon, a modern cient
FrenchEgyptian men-nefer, or "good
author, has written the following place."
: "LeThe city was also known as
Nil ...est capable de fournir a l'homme
Ha-Kha-Ptah, that is, "House of Wor-
en toute saison l'eau que le ciel ship
lui re-
of Ptah"- the god of Memphis
fuse. Il lui prodigue en outre leandlimon
creator of the world - which was
qui forme le sol cultivable, cettelater
noiretransformed into "Egypt."5
khémi célébrée sous les pharaons."* The title of the country's king,
The entire country had also been "Pharaoh," derives from the
namely,
given the name "Thebes." According to per-ao, which means "great
Egyptian
Aristotle's Meteorologica, "in house."6
ancient
times Egypt was called Thebes"
B. The Institution That Shocked Herodotus
(351b).4 Pausanias, on the other hand,
the celebrated geographer of Lydia When ancient authors from other
countries examined Egypt's family
who lived in the second century A.D.,
informs us in his Description of system, they found it shockingly
Greece that Homer "referred to the different from those of their own
river as Egypt, not Nile" (IX, xl, 6). lands. Herodotus, for example, said so
Obviously, this is a reference to the about the family as well as other
epic poet's words, "Egypt, the heaven- Egyptian social institutions (Histo-
fed river" ( Odyssey , IV, 477), and ries, II, 35-36). Anaxandrides (380
"fair-flowing Egypt" (XIV, 257). B.C.), the Rhodian poet of the Middle
Similarly, Arrian (second century Comedy, who seems to have written
A.D.), the Greek historian, philoso- the first satirical plays dealing with
pher, and statesman of Nicomedia, love, in his Island-Towns lampooned
states the following in his Anabasis of and ridiculed Egyptian zoolatry, cir-
Alexander: "In old times, Egypt was cumcision, castration, and other prac-
the name of the river which the Egyp- tices (Athenaeus, Deipnosophists,
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MARRIAGE AND FAMILY CUSTOMS IN ANCIENT EGYPT 231
299f). Athenaeus (200 A.D.), the Egypt bril- was Min" ( Histories , II, 4).
liant Greek scholar of Naucratis,Similarly,
also Diodorus states the follow-
informs us that the Egyptian Iliad ing of
in his Library of History: "they
Hipparchns contained the following say that Menas was the first king of
words : "And I did not like the kind of Egypt" (I, 45). It has also been as-
life which the Egyptians lead, pluck-serted that "Pharaoh Menes was ob-
ing quails and slimy magpies" ( Deip liged
- to found a separate capital in
nosophists, 393c).7 which he fortified himself" - this was
Still, the Egyptian family systemthe famous city of Memphis.12 As for
was highly developed even in extreme-the time of this event, various dates
ly ancient times.8 The small conjugalhave been given by experts :13
family was characterized by a high de- B C B 0.
gree of solidarity, cooperation, and Birch 5895 Petrie 4777
filial piety. Relative autonomy in eachChampollion 5870 Brugsch 4455
generation is further indicated by the Mariette 5004 Lepsius 3892
absence of family names; each indi- Lenormant 4915 Renouf 3000
vidual had only a personal name, to Wilkinson 2691
which that of his father might be at-
tached: "A, son of B." Funeral docu- It seems that Egyptian marriag
ments, of course, might mention one least before the time of the Ptolemies
or both parents.9 An additional indi-(304-30 B.C.), included no religious
cation of some independence is the in-ceremony. A legal contract, which was
adequate development of ancestor very carefully worded, merely pro-
worship and genealogies. It was only tected the rights and interests of the
in later times, and chiefly among thespouses. In addition, the law empha-
upper classes, that genealogical trees sized "temporary" marriage, as mari-
were cultivated with the devotion and tal unions "were not definitely con-
zeal of a master gardener. tracted until after a 'trial-year.' ""
In general, the family was consid- Since, at least during the dynastic pe-
ered so important that it became "the riod, tribal and family totem tabus
basis for religion, the training of
were absent, it appears correct to con-
clude that a man was permitted to
children, transmitting the secrets of
trades and arts, and private prop- marry virtually any woman. Indeed,
although great emphasis was placed
erty."10 In fact, the Egyptians be-
lieved that even after death the souls
on marriage itself, ancient Egyptian
of each family's members, together love songs often indicate that free
with their servants and slaves, werechoice of mate was also stressed. The
reunited in Tuat, the region of the son of Cheops, the second king of the
dead. However, although sexual unionFourth Dynasty (about 2650 B.C.),
advised: "Marry a woman who loves
continued in this nether kingdom, re-
production was impossible; Tuat's il-
you and a son will be born to you."
lusive and phantom inhabitants ar-Child marriages, on the other hand,
rived only from the earth.11 were not entirely absent. This, com-
bined with frequent pregnancies, cre-
II. Marriage and King Menes
ated many physical dangers for Egyp-
According to Herodotus, the insti-tian women. Regarding the financial
tution of marriage was introduced aspects of marriage, Baber15 has
into Egypt by Menes. Calling him
stated that a dowry of 50 measures of
"Min," the historian adds : "They said
corn and six ounces of silver, that is,
that the first man to become king ofmore than 100 dollars, was given to
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232 SOCIAL. SCIENCE FOR OCTOBER 1966
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MARRIAGE AND FAMILY CUSTOMS IN ANCIENT EGYPT 233
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234 SOCIAL SCIENCE FOB OCTOBER 1966
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MARRIAGE AND FAMILY CUSTOMS IN ANCIENT EGYPT 235
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236 SOCIAL SCIENCE FOR OCTOBER 1966
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MARRIAGE AND FAMILY CUSTOMS IN ANCIENT EGYPT 237
expense of content. This was particu- of Khety," which was written during
larly true of the training received bythe Middle Kingdom (First Theban
Empire, 2052-1778 B.C.) and, among
higher officials and scribes - in Egypt,
the latter were powerful bureaucrats. other things, said the following about
As The Eloquent Peasant of 1900 B.C. the soldier: "he must carry his food
indicates, not infrequently, reports, and drink on his back like a donkey."
letters, and petitions were thus It is quite obvious, then, that the very
judged by their style ! This, combinedsimilar verses of Ecclesiasticus, or
with the Egyptians' passion for writ- Book of Sirach. written in the second
ing letters, explains why the scribe century B.C. by Jesus, the son of
Amonmes, as we see in the Papyrus Eleazar, were actually inspired by
Anastasi (V, xx, 6), wrote to his fa- these Egyptian satires. Indeed, the
wealthy scribe of Jerusalem, who had
ther in this manner : "In life, prosper-
ity, health, and in favor of Amon-Ra, traveled in many lands, said :
King of the gods, I say to Ra-Har- "The wisdom of a learned man corn-
akhte and to Atmu and his Ennead: etti by opportunity of leisure : and he
May est thou be in health everythat hath little business shall become
day."
(An Ennead, or Pesedjet, was a wise. cult'sHow can he get wisdom that hol-
or city's group of nine gods repre- deth the plough, and that glorieth in
the goad, that driveth oxen, and is oc-
senting the basic cosmic forces. Later,
however, because its meaning cupied
had in their labours, and whose
been forgotten, an Ennead might talkin-
is of bullocks? He giveth his
clude more, or fewer, than nine minddei-
to make furrows ; and is diligent
ties, as in the case of the Ennead of the kine fodder. So every car-
to give
Thebes, which consisted of 15 divini-
penter and workmaster, that labour-
ties.) Still, instruction in letter eth
writ-
night and day: and they that cut
ing did not exclude the teaching of
and grave seals, and are diligent to
moral principles to delinquentmake stu-great variety, and give them-
dents. "Scribe," advised one of theselves
les- to counterfeit imagery, and
sons, "do not give yourself up to watch
plea-to finish a work : The smith also
sure, or you will be a failure." sitting by the anvil, and considering
13. The fact that the sons of scribes the iron work, the vapour of the fire
usually became scribes28 constitutes wasteth his flesh, and he fighteth with
one of the main reasons why thesethe heat of the furnace: the noise of
parent-teachers - the scribes - devel- the hammer and the anvil is ever in
oped a peculiar literary form, the his ears, and his eyes look still upon
occupational satire. In other words, to the pattern of the things that he mak-
inspire their son-pupils to devote eth; he setteth his mind to finish his
themselves to the scribe's profession, work, and watcheth to polish it per-
the teachers composed satirical pieces fectly: So doth the potter sitting at
about other occupations, such as those his work, and turning the wheel about
of the baker, barber, fellah, fisherman, with his feet, who is alway carefully
hunter, mason, messenger, potter, set at his work, and maketh all his
priest, sailor, soldier, and washerman. work by number; he fashioneth the
These compositions, which were incor- clay with his arm, and boweth down
porated into the teaching of reading his strength • before his feet; he ap-
and writing at school, were exceeding- plieth himself to lead it over; and he
ly popular for a very long time in an- is diligent to make clean the furnace :
cient Egypt. It seems that the first all these trust to their hands . . . they
work of this type was "The Teaching shall not be sought for in public coun-
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238 SOCIAL SCIENCE FOE OCTOBER 1966
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MARRIAGE AND FAMILY CUSTOMS IN ANCIENT EGYPT 239
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240 SOCIAL SCIENCE FOB OCTOBER 1966
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MARRIAGE AND FAMILY CUSTOMS IN ANCIENT EGYPT 241
dren are advised: "Thou shalt never ancient world - the Egyptians had
forget thy mother, or what she many has such rulers, including Neit-
done for thee. . . . Three long yearsHetep, queen of Menes, and Mert-
she carried thee on her shoulder and Neit, queen of Usaphais. Both of these
gave thee her breast to thy mouth. powerful women, who were local prin-
She nurtured thee, nor knew offense cesses before their political mar-
for thy uncleanness. And when thou riages, brought fabulous dowries to
didst enter school, and wast in- their royal spouses. Then, Queen Hat-
structed in the writings, daily sheshepsut (the "Divine Wife," 1504-1483
stood by the master with bread B.C.), who added a beard and other
and beer from the house."46 The Max- male characteristics to her portraits
ims of Ani, compiled about 1000 B.C., and statues, and whose great architect
further reveal that, although a son Senenmut built architectonic master-
was expected to make offerings to pieces like the marvelous temple of
both of his deceased parents, it wasDeir el-Bahari, gave a somewhat un-
his duty to be more respectful toward important administrative post to her
his mother. Then, in many mastabassecond
- husband. Of course, when the
private tombs - we find that the Egyp-army rebelled, the brave queen lost
tian nobles were usually accompanied her power. But, later on, women often
by their mothers, not fathers. Other became priestesses. A princess, for
tombs included the father's name much example, might function as a high
less frequently than that of the moth- priestess in the Thebes temple of
er. It is also true that, under the Mid-Amon, the Jupiter of the Nile. And,
dle Kingdom, or First Theban Empiresince this religious center was
(2052-1778 B.C.), a man ordinarily influential like Delphi, women actually
traced his descent from his mother occupied an exceedingly important,
though unofficial, governmental posi-
and identified himself by mentioning
tion. One may also add that even Juli-
her name. It is no wonder, then, that
the masses customarily spoke of us Caesar had to marry Cleopatra
their
ancestresses, not ancestors. (69-30 B.C.) in order to become
Egypt's ruler and, especially, to be ac-
3. The safety and welfare of women
cepted bý the Egyptians.
were so important that, in the Domes-
day Book of Ramses III, the king Furthermore, although the Pha-
(1198-1166 B.C.) boasts: "I made the raohs " sont des souverains absolus
land safe, so that a lone woman could dont le pouvoir tient à leur caractère
go on her way freely and none would divin,"** they still had to marry heir-
molest her." Similar statements are esses before becoming kings, since it
found in countless triumph songs, seems that succession laws stressed
which "recount the conquests andthe glo- female line. That is why a queen
rious victories of the Egyptians.who . . had
. no children "would have had
They undoubtedly existed from . the . . the right to choose her second hus-
earliest times."47 band and so to determine the succes-
4. In most artistic representations sor to the throne of Egypt."49 Queen
in which two parents and a child were Ankhesenamun, the third daughter of
shown, the latter was their daughter,Akhnaton (or Amenophis IV, 1372-
not their son. 1354 B.C.), wrote the following to
5. Unlike the Babylonians, who had Suppiluliumas, the king of the Hittites,
only one female ruler - Semiramis, when she asked him for one of his sons :
Ninus's legendary wife, who built the"I will never take one of my subjects
walls and hanging gardens of Baby- and marry him."
lon, one of the seven wonders of the 6. "Additional evidence concerning
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242 SOCIAL SCIENCE FOE OCTOBEB 1966
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MARRIAGE AND FAMILY CUSTOMS IN ANCIENT EGYPT 243
d. Servants. About 3000 B.C., it clothe her, anoint her, caress her, and
seems that female servants were often make her heart glad as long as thou
sacrificed in the tombs of their mas- li vest."60
ters. In later times, however, only 13. Women "also went on fishing
their statues were buried in these and hunting expeditions together with
tombs. In the master's household, their spouses."61
while male servants usually did the 14. The harems of Egypt, unlike
cooking, female servants baked breadthose of the Orient, included no eu-
and engaged in the most laborious do-nuchs or veils. Indeed, the practice
mestic activity, namely, grinding corn.known as "purdah" (a "Hindustani
This task, which was the servants' word for 'curtain,' taken from the Per-
chief responsibility in wealthy homes, sian pardah, and meaning a screen
was especially arduous and operose in hiding women from the sight of men
earlier times, when the rotary millor strangers, and the system of such
had not been invented as yet. One may seclusion"62) was absent.
also add that " los esclavos tenían al- 15. Like men, women were prom-
gunos derechos legales, tales comoised la eternal life by the religion of
propiedad de sus bienes, incluyendoEgypt. la
tierra, que podían dejar en herencia 16. Finally, a woman could share,
a sus hijos. Algunos de ellos tenían not only the same house, but also the
sus propios sirvientes y les estaba
same tomb with her husband.63
permitido casarse con personas li-Such beliefs, customs, and prac-
bres."56 tices, of course, do not mean - and this
10. In many respects, woman was must be stated most emphatically -
the mistress of her house. that women controlled Egypt almost
11. According to Will Durant, "The completely. As far as we know, genu-
love poems and letters that have comeine matriarchy never prevailed in the
down to us are generally addressed byland of the Nile. On the contrary, men
the lady to the man; she begs for as- were rather dominant in many areas.64
signations, she presses her suit direct- For instance, "not the mother, but a
ly, she formally proposes marriage."57 male relative of hers had the greatest
Numerous other authors have also authority over a youth."65 According
stated that women were permitted to "the youth looked to his ma-
to Baber,
initiate love affairs.88 In the Harris ternal grandfather, rather than to his
Papyrus, a woman expresses her sen-own father, as his most powerful pro-
timents as follows : tector and the one most vitally inter-
ested in his success."66
"I am thy first sister,
And thou art to me as the garden At any rate, "women enjoyed un-
Which I have planted with flowers usually high social status in ancient
And all sweet-smelling herbs. Egypt. But when the country began to
decline and the influence of the sur-
I directed a canal into it,
That thou mightest dip thy hand intorounding patriarchal societies became
it prevalent, the status of women also
When the north wind blows cool."59 declined."67 "Under the Ptolemies,"
for example, "the influence of the
12. In the Papyrus Prisse, which Greeks was so great that freedom of
contains two books of practical wis- divorce, claimed in earlier times by
dom, one by Kagemna and the other the wife, became the exclusive privi-
by Ptah-Hotep, a contemporary of lege of the husband," particularly
King Assa, we read: "Love thy wife among the upper classes.68 And when
and do not quarrel with her. Feed her, Emperor Augustus conquered Egypt
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244 SOCIAL SCIENCE FOB OCTOBER 1966
adornment for
(August 1, 30 B.C.), "All respect of women, who were fond
women was lost."69 of having his image carved on the han-
Before closing this section, two dles of their mirrors, rouge boxes and
more things should be added re- scent bottles.'"1
garding ancient Egyptian women. Notes
First, as myriads of tomb reliefs in
1 Proia, Epitomon Engyclopaedicon Lexicon ,
Egypt, as well as various works of artsecond edition, Athens: Proia, 1955, p. 225. Need-
in the Fourth Egyptian Room of the
less to add, this theory, like certain of the addi-
British Museum, indicate, the women
tional theories presented in this study, is not ac-
cepted by all experts. It seems unnecessary, how-
of the Nile, especially those in the
ever, to engage - in an essay such as the present
upper classes, were usually slender,
one - in interminable altercations and polemics re-
graceful, and broad-shouldered. It garding the accuracy of the various sources con-
sulted. It is equally unnecessary to introduce com-
was this type that influenced the art
plex analyses and wearisomely protracted explana-
of Crete Island, where Egyptian tions of "inconsistencies," since these are not
genuine, in view of ancient Egypťs extremely
ideals were half-Hellenized, and thatlong history and institutional heterogeneity, as
later led to the esthetic bisexuality ofwell as of myriad social changes from millennium
the Greeks. Of course, as the famousto millennium. Besides, does the reader have to
be reminded of various 20th century social insti-
Queen of Punt and, particularly, her tutions and great (?) statesmen, regarding which
young daughter in Cairo's Egyptianand whom modern experts (?) are indefatigably
Museum (formerly reliefs in Hatshep- and prolifically producing books and articles that
are replete with incredible inconsistencies and
sut's temple at Deir el-Bahari) evince,diametrical opposites? Moreover, is it necessary to
at least a few women were exceeding-add that analogous problems are also typical of
the natural sciences? Perhaps someday, some-
ly corpulent and steatopygous. where, someone will discover a mysterious socio-
Second, to beautify themselves, be-psychological unit, invent a wondrously objective
sides employing mirrors and red-and absolutely exact system of quantification and
measurement, and thus create a Utopian social sci-
ocher rouge for the lips, women usedence. Until then, let us be patient, kind, under-
"cosmetic devices such as eye and standing, generous, and charitable!
face pigments, perfumes, hair dye,New*J. B. Bury, The Ancient Greek Historians,
York: Dover, 1958, p. 50.
wigs, cleansing unguents and elaborate * " L'Égypte ," in Pierre Ďeffontaines, Géographie
make-up kits."70 ín the Papyrus ofUniverselle Larousse , Paris: Larousse, 1959, Vol-
Ani, when Ani speaks to Osiris in theumeVirtually
2, p. 54.
all passages from ancient works in-
Hall of Maat, he mentions the use of cluded in this study have been translated by the
myrrh by women (CXXV, 16). In hispresent author.
5 G. S. Ghurye, Cities and Civilization , Bom-
Ďeipnosophists, Athenaeus also statesbay: Popular Prakashan, 1962, p. 126.
that there were many kinds of wine in 6 Proia, loc. cit.
'See, also, Ray Erwin Baber, "Marriage and
the valley of the Nile, adding the fol-Family Life in Ancient Egypt," Social Forces,
lowing: "Superior to these is that of March 1935, p. 409. For two brief articles on the
Antylla, a town not far from Alexan-same subject, see Panos D. Bardis, "The Ancient
Egyptian Family," Indian Sociological Bulletin,
dria, the taxes from which were given in press; "Marriage and the Family Among the
by the Egyptian kings of that time . . . Ancient Egyptians," Revista del Instituto de
to their wives in order to buy girdles" Ciencias Sociales, in press.
8 James Henry Breasted, The Dawn of Con-
(33f). Ancient sources further inform science , New York: Scribner. 1947, p. 118.
us that wigs, which were made of •Concerning various funerary practices among
sheep's wool or human hair, were sel-the ancient Egyptians, see a scholarly and fas-
cinating essay by Dr. G. S. Ghurye, one of Indiai
dom worn at home, since they weregreatest social scientists, in his Anthropo-Sociologi-
enormous and elaborate, and since thecal Papers, Bombay: Popular Prakashan, 1963,
climate was extremely warm. Finally,pp. 080-94.
S. E. Frost, Jr., Essentials of History of Edu-
it is interesting that Bes, the gro-cation, Great Neck, New York: Barron's, 1947,
p. 7.
tesque, malformed, hirsute, and ridic- 11 E. A. Wallis Budge, Osiris, New Hyde Park,
ulously grinning god of childbirth, New York: University Books, 1961, Volume 2,
"also presided over the toilet andpp. 160-161.
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MARRIAGE AND FAMILY CUSTOMS IN ANCIENT EGYPT 245
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