English 8 Creative Writing “Alien Report”

An alien explorer who has been orbiting Earth in a spaceship must write a report
to its superior about its first impressions of Earthlings. The “catch” is that the
alien has experienced the planet ONLY from the internet.

Write a 2 page double spaced in blue or black pen or a 1 page double spaced
typed report that the alien would send to his leader. You need to include:
- Proper grammar and punctuation
- Complete sentences
- 3 specific examples of “real” human life from the internet to show your
alien’s first impression of Earthlings
To: Commander????

Commander, I have finished my evaluation of Earth and the humans. Their behaviour is
very strange. Everyone is chasing around funny little animals and trapping them in balls. Then
they attack someone else's animals with their own. I know this sounds crazy but it's true.
I personally don't think we should attack; they have very strong weapons called
lightsabers
and blaster rifles. From what I've seen, they can also choke people from afar. Another
real threat is the "Death Star". It is a very large ship that can destroy planets. I can't even find it
on my scanners. They must have found some way to cloak it.
Even if we could take the planet, there are many hazards. A giant lizard type thing named
Godzilla wrecks their cities and towns. Think about what it could do to us! There are also
deadly sea monsters, zombies, vampires, Pokemon, and a large purple dinosaur that makes me go
insane just listening to it!
This concludes my survey and I hope for our sake you choose to leave Earth alone.
Adam Baigent

Space Cadet Ashley Reporting to #1 Supervisor Stardate November 1999

My first impression of these Earthlings off the telestrator is odd! These Earthlings are
mnning around and bashing into each other wearing funny hats. They have numbers on the back
of these hats and seem to be chasing a pig-skinned brown thing. They're running on a long green
plain. Every few minutes, the Earthlings jump up and down, bashing into each other. They
often throw the brown thing into each other's arms. They seem very violent! Cadet Ashley now
signing off. Returning at 0100 hours, after lunch!

0100 Cadet Ashley signing in to report on Earthlings #2

As I watch the telestrator I am confused. These Earthlings have tall, spiky, blue hair and
short stubby bodies. Wow! These odd things are very different than Report #1. These
Earthlings have big eyes and they have a weird looking skinny brown thing that makes high
squeaking sounds. Can you say "rude"? I can and Earthling children are very rude and
disrespectful. What the heck is on that female Earthling's head that look like spiky points?
Anyway, she's blowing into something and a deep sound comes out. Out for dinner, Supervisor
#1. Be back at 1700 hours. Cadet Ashley signing out.

17:00 Cadet Ashley signing in to report on Earthlings #3

Earthlings: carrying sticks in their hands, passing a black circular thing to each other,
wearing white hats with bracketed covers over their faces.
Earthlings: bashing another Earthling into clear windows with white bottoms. The
Earthlings are fighting for the black object. It seems that the King of the Earthlings wears "99"
on
his back and goes by the name "the Great One". Once again, they seem to be very violent as
they bang into each other and hit each other with great wooden type sticks with other Earthlings
yelling in the area surrounding the slippery cold surface. Cadet Ashley signing off at 1800 hours.
Ashley Parry