UNIT 6.

PEOPLE AND BEHAVIOUR

I. Answer the following questions:

1. In what ways are people different?
2. Are there fundamental differences between people belonging to different nations/ races/ genders or
people looking differently?
3. Can you think of situations that provoke extreme emotion? Do men and women react in the same way in
these situations?

II. You are going to hear a discussion between a man and a woman about male and female
attitudes to being ill. Write Yes or No next to 1-7, according to whether the statements
accurately reflect what the woman says or not.
1. The woman thinks that men believe they never have mild illnesses.
2. She expresses sympathy for injured football players.
3. She believes that most men try to hide their reactions to pain.
4. She thinks that men do not like to take time off work through illness.
5. She thinks that men prefer to be looked after by their mothers when they are ill.
6. She believes that women, unlike men, accept that they will experience some pain in life.
7. She thinks that women expect their partners to look after them when they are ill.

III. For questions 1-7 you must choose which of the paragraphs A-H on the next page fit into the
numbered gaps in the following text. There is one extra paragraph which does not fit in any of
the gaps.
DIFFERENT WAVELENGTHS

Men: they cringe at the prospect of discussing anything personal, grumble they are being nagged when
asked to take out the rubbish and, if they lose their way while driving, rage at the suggestion they ask for
directions.
Women: they read things into the most innocuous comment, get upset when their man says “I” rather
than “we” and demand impossibly detailed reports of every conversation they miss – who said what and
how they looked when they said it.
And, says Deborah Tannen, it will all go on like this, each sex bristling at the other’s peculiar ways, until
we wake up to the simple truth – men and women don’t speak the same language.
1. ........................................
Since our lives are lived as a series of conversations, it’s her belief that the sooner we start to appreciate and
understand these differences – and the reasons behind them – the better.
2. .......................................
For more than 20 years she has studied how people talk -what they mean by what they say and how it can
be interpreted and often misunderstood. Eavesdropping in restaurants, collecting friends’ anecdotes,
watching hundreds of hours of taped conversations .......all in the name of research.
3. .........................................
Men are concerned primarily with status and prefer discussion of facts to dissection of feelings. Since
feelings suggest vulnerability and thus inferiority, men see conversation as another way of scoring points.
4. .........................................
So who’s right? Neither, says Deborah Tannen. This sort of disagreement typifies the different approaches
men and women have to asking for information. Since women are so used to asking for help, refusing to ask
directions makes no sense to the wife. To her, asking for and receiving directions reinforces the bond
between people.
5. ........................................
This may sound a long-winded explanation, but in the world of socio-linguistics, it is only scratching the
surface of the male-female conversational anomalies in this particular situation. Mention any aspect of
everyday chat and Deborah can give examples of the ways men and women’s attitudes to it differ.

6. .........................................
Apparently, the main difference in the way we communicate is the crucial matter of the metamessage – the
unspoken attitudes, thoughts and intentions behind what is actually said. And while fact-oriented men tend
to listen to the message, feeling-oriented women tend to listen for the subtler metamessage. For instance:
She: Why didn’t you ask me how my day was?
He: If you’ve got something to tell me, tell me. Why do you have to be invited?
7. ..........................................
Deborah maintains: “Without understanding the gender differences in ways of speaking, we’re doomed to
blame other people, or ourselves, or the relationship. The biggest mistake is believing there is one right way
to listen, talk and have a conversation.”

a. The thrust of this study is that women use language to enhance intimacy, man to assert independence.
Women, concerned primarily with making connections with people, regard conversation as a way to
share feelings, create bonds and explore possible solutions to common problems.
b. But in her husband’s hierarchical world, driving round until he finds the way himself is a reasonable
thing to do. Men are comfortable with giving help and information, but not with receiving it. So asking
for directions would make the husband feel he was dropping in status by revealing his lack of
knowledge.
c. Their simplest exchange sparked off misunderstandings and irritation. Just before they separated, she
attended a course in linguistics at the University of Michigan. Suddenly the light dawned. The problem
wasn’t what they’d be saying, but of course, how. The divorce went through – but Deborah was hooked.
d. It’s not so much that the vocabulary and grammar we use are different, she explains. The differences lie
in the way men and women talk.
e. The lost-in-the-car scenario is an illustration of this. You know the scene – it’s universal. Invited to a
party, a couple have been driving round in circles for half an hour searching for the address which he is
sure is nearby. She is fuming because he insists on trying to find the address himself instead of stopping
to ask directions.
f. She’s fed up because she wants to hear evidence that he cares how her day went, regardless of what
actually happened. And he, concerned principally with the fact-exchanging aspect of conversation, can’t
understand what she’s complaining about.
g. Take politeness. Men consider it subservient, women sensitive. Boasting. Men boast as a matter of
course, battling to gain or maintain that all-important status. Women, who tend to gain acceptance with
each other by appearing the same as, not better than, everyone else, take care never to boast.
h. Tall, gentle, immediately likeable and mercifully spouting little of the jargon you’d expect of one of the
world’s leading lights in her field, Deborah Tannen is Professor of Linguistics at the University of
Georgetown, Washington DC.

 To be doomed
 Thrust
 To be hooked
 To fume
 Subservient
 To spout
 To cringe
 To grumble
 To nag
  To rage
 To bristle
 Innocuous
 Peculiar
 To eavesdrop
 To reinforce
 Bond

IV. Look at the table below and try to find as many pairs of antonyms as possible. Then use the
words to describe the people below:

shy thoughtless honest

bad-tempered mean sociable
friendly affectionate patient
out-going good-tempered generous
fun thoughtful nice
selfish easygoing caring
childish mature kind

1. She gives a lot of money to charity, and she likes to share everything she has with other people.
2. He’s great to go out with to parties and discos. He makes me laugh.
3. He never gets angry. He’s always calm and relaxed.
4. She never thinks about how other people may feel.
5. He’s very loving. He likes to show that he cares about me.
6. Sometimes he does stupid things. He should grow up!
7. He doesn’t like spending his money.
8. She is only interested in herself.

V. We often use adjectives that end in –y to describe personality. Find the phrase in the
description that defines each of the words below.

fussy cheeky witty nosy moody

Well, frankly, my brother is all of those things. He likes everything to be in the right place all the time.
He always wants to know what everybody else is doing, even when it’s none of his business. He is
bright and lively one minute, and quiet and bad-tempered the next.
But he thinks very quickly and says the funniest things, although sometimes what he says is funny but
rude to people older or more senior than him. For example, he asked his teacher why his red tie was the
same colour as his eyes. The teacher had been to a party the night before – it was very funny but
definitely rude!

VI. Choose the right answer:

1. My wife is always ......... when she is busy and becomes angry at me for no reason at all.
a. jealous; b. talkative; c. content; d. bad-tempered.
2. Students at the school where I teach are very .......... They always hand in their homework on time.
a. patient; b. lazy; c. reliable; d. friendly.
3. Glenn is very .......... He always helps out the underprivileged people in our community.
a. creative; b. reticent; c. sociable; d. generous.
4. My little sister is so ......... at school that she is afraid to ask any question.
 a. shy; b. courageous; c. tolerant; d. envious.
5. Never ask Phoebe to dance while her husband is looking. He always gets so ......... of her.
a. jealous; b. responsive; c. loving; d. tolerant.
6. Our new teacher is very .......... If we don't understand something, she goes over it again and again
until we do.
a. patient; b. easy going; c. friendly; d. thoughtless.
7. Mary's husband is very .......... He never helps her with any of the chores around the house.
a. handsome; b. dependable; c. lazy; d. tolerant.
8. Our English teacher at school is very .......... He is always coming up with new games that help make
learning fun.
a. creative; b. creating; c. talkative; d. trustworthy.
9. Fiona loves parties and getting around with friends. That’s because she is very …….
a. easy going; b. selfish; c. party; d. fun.
10. William loves gossip. He always wants to know what everybody else is up to. That’s because he’s
…….
a. inquisitive; b. interesting; c. informed; d. bad tempered.
11. Please don’t push. It’s very ..........
a. bad-tempered; b. rude; c. unsympathetic.
12. Jack hates spending money. He is rather ............
a. frank; b. greedy; c. mean.
13. Our teacher is very .................and won’t let us talk in class.
a. lenient; b. strict; c. understanding.
14. Helen never does her homework. She is rather ....
a. gentle; b. lazy; c. reliable.
15. Teresa never gets angry with children. She is very ........
a. brave; b. patient; c. pleasant.

VII. Match the following body idioms with their significance. Then use the right form of the idioms
above to fill in the gaps:

1. break someone's heart a. persuade someone;

b. watch someone carefully;
2. stand on your own two feet
c. entirely;
3. back someone up
4. learn something by heart d. be independent
5. have got green fingers e. upset someone greatly;
6. keep an eye on f. be a very kind person;
7. from head to toe g. be very busy;
8. have your hands full h. like gardening;
i. support someone;
9. have a heart of gold
j. remember all the words without help.
10. twist someone's arm

1. She ………………………………..when she left him.

2. I’ve ………………………..the poem …………, so I can recite it to you.
3. She'll always help – she ………………………….. .
4. I can't do anything about it right now – my …………………. .
 5. Her garden looks amazing. She must …………………..
6. I didn't want to go out, but, after he …………………….., I finally went.
7. I don't need your help – I can ………………………………
8. Thank you for ………………………… in the meeting. I wouldn’t have persuaded them without your
help.
9. I think that he is not really honest; you’d better ………………..
10. We were covered in mud ………………

VIII. In about 150 words, say what personal qualities you think are important in one of the
following categories of people?

a. a close friend b. a wife/ a husband

c. a parent d. a grandparent
e. a colleague f. a boss