Elizabeth Putnam

Written Reflection Summary

The most important thing I learned about my partner is that in his home country, men and

women aren’t friends, and that they only speak when they are wanting a relationship. This was

important for me learn because when we first started speaking, we were talking over social

media afterwards and I considered all our interactions as friendly, but I later learned that he

considered it more than friendly because of his home culture. I realized in one of our later

conversations that the only time men talk to women in his country is when they are seeking a

relationship, not a friendship, which I haven’t experienced before here in America. That was a

concept we differ on completely, and I’m very glad I learned that from him. I had always

assumed before that any interactions I have with someone start as friendly and can turn into a

relationship later, but after talking to him I know that I should make my intentions clearer when

interacting with people from different cultures. I also learned from this that Franck stopped all

communication when he assumed I had a boyfriend, which was very interesting as well, but a

part of his culture.

After my discussions with Franck, I learned that I communicate a lot more openly about

harsher or more uncomfortable topics than other cultures might be comfortable with. I openly

talked about politics and controversial topics with Franck with ease, and it was sometimes more

uncomfortable for him to share his opinions on those topics. I have also discovered that I hold

some biases that I was unaware of about Africa in general. I also grouped Africa together as a

whole and assumed that it was a war-torn continent that had starving children because of what I
saw on the media. I have grown as a person since talking to Franck and I have realized my biases

and have since removed them from my life. I now know that there are all types of people from all

different places, and I shouldn’t have any biases for anyone before I meet them.

Franck and I’s conversations linked with our talks about intercultural communication and

culture. Franck and I’s conversations were the definition of intercultural communication, and we

were similar in all aspects of communication, only differing in how we would communicate with

different sexes and what we would talk about. Franck and I also linked our conversations with

culture because we discussed largely about how much our cultures differed. We discussed how

his funerals differed from the ones in America and how their grieving process would be

considered “dramatic” in America, because they grieve very largely and openly while Americans

hide their grief to look strong. I really enjoyed our talks and it made the class easier when our

talks related to the topics we were discussing in class.

The theories we learned in class helped me be more aware of how I spoke to someone of

a different culture, so I wasn’t offensive or rude to him. I was able to understand and be more

accepting of Franck’s cultural practices after we spoke about culture in class and intercultural

communication.

Talking with my partner didn’t challenge anything we learned in class, but our

discussions sometimes challenged my own beliefs. Franck and I discussed the topic of LGBT

couples and marriage in his country, and he said that being LGBT was punishable by death in his

country. This is a very different view from my own, and he didn’t share his opinion on the topic,

but it angered me at first. I came to realize that other countries have different beliefs than my

own, but I don’t believe people should be punished with death for being a certain way. Although,
I’m glad Franck and I talked about this because it again showed me the differences in cultures

around the world.

I have become more open minded since talking to Franck and more culturally aware. I

have also taken another course this semester about Somali culture, so that has contributed as

well. I think that before I had a good understanding of different cultures I was exposed too, like

Mexican culture, but I never knew of any cultures away from North America. I am glad I got to

learn from Franck about his culture because it makes me want to learn about as many cultures as

I can, and I’m glad I got paired with such a great partner.