Part I: Skills on Sentence Combining
1. Inserting Words
1. Inserting Words
2. Inserting Phrases
3. Creating Compound Subjects, Verbs and
Predicates
4. Creating a Compound Sentence
5. Creating a Complex Sentence
Technical
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Inserting Participle Phrases
† The hikers struggled on the mountain.
They were gasping for breath and nearly
exhausted.
† The hikers, gasping for breath and nearly
exhausted, struggled on the mountain.
† They talked excitedly.
They were separated for a long time.
† Separated for a long time, they talked
excitedly.
Technical
writing 2009
Inserting Absolute Phrases
† John returned, shuddering, three minutes
later. His arms were soaked and red to the
elbows.
† John returned, shuddering, three minutes
later, his arms soaked and red to the
elbows.
† The hunters rested for a moment in front of
the shack. Their breaths were white in the
frosty air.
† The hunters rested for a moment in front of
the shack, their breaths white in the
frosty air.
Technical
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2. Inserting Phrases
† Combining two sentences by † Prepositional Phrases
inserting words: 1. John lives in a house.
1. I like cake. The flavor of cake is This house has a door located on the front.
(Hint: with)
chocolate.
† John lives in a house with a door located
† I like chocolate-flavored cake. on the front.
2. John lives in a house. This house is † I like to go fishing.
big and white. It is a sunny day. (Hint: on)
† John lives in a big and white house. † I like to go fishing on a sunny day.
Technical Technical
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Practical exercise for inserting
participle phrases Inserting Appositive Phrases
† The ship was badly damaged by the storm. The ship 1. Neil Amstrong is best known for his historic first
finally reached a safe harbor. steps on the moon. Neil Amstrong is a former
† Badly damaged by the storm, the ship finally reached U.S. astronaut.
a safe harbor. „ Neil Amstrong, a former U.S. astronaut, is
† Globalization brings people and institutions in distant best known for his historic first steps on the
parts of the world closer economically. This enhances moon.
their opportunities to trade goods, services and labor. 2. The pilot was stranded for twelve hours inside of
† Globalization brings people and institutions in distant his jet. The pilot was a former Air Force
parts of world closer economically, enhancing their mechanic. His jet was a Cessna Skylane.
opportunities to trade goods, services and labor.
The pilot, a former Air Force mechanic, was
stranded for twelve hours inside of his jet, a
Cessna Skylane.
Technical Technical
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3. Building Compound Subjects, Verbs
Practical exercise for inserting and Predicates
Absolute phrases
1. A volcano begins as molten rock beneath
† I stood in the doorway of the boxcar, rocking with the earth’s surface. It gradually rises
the motion of the train.
My ears were full of the rushing wind and the upward.
clattering wheels. A volcano begins as molten rock beneath
† I stood in the doorway of the boxcar, rocking with
the motion of the train, my ears full of the rushing
the earth’s surface and gradually rises
wind and the clattering wheels. upward.
† The woman was busy with her housework. 2. Volcanoes can create land area. Glaciers
† The breeze blew through the windows and made her can also create land area. They both can
relaxed.
† The woman was busy with her housework, the breeze destroy land area.
blowing through the windows, making her relaxed. Volcanoes and glaciers can create and
destroy land area.
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4. Building a Compound Sentence
† Use coordinate conjunctions when two
sentences are about equally important.
† Arteries carry blood away from the heart.
Veins carry blood to the heart.
† Arteries carry blood away from the heart,
but veins carry blood to the heart.
† Arteries carry blood away from the heart;
veins carry blood to the heart.
† Arteries carry blood away from the heart,
while veins carry blood to the heart.
Technical
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Part II: Skills on writing
effective sentences
† The following guidelines will help you
effectively compose or write your
sentences:
1. Add variety to your sentences.
2. Add emphasis to parts of your
sentences.
3. Use concise wording to create
more powerful sentences.
4. Put key actions in verbs, not in nouns.
5. Use first person pronouns appropriately, or
use research scholarly terms as subject in
active voice.
6. Avoid using unclear pronoun reference.
Technical
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Active vs. Passive voice
(3.) Active Voice: In technical writing, use active
verbs rather than passive verbs.
† Passive: The contest was won by my cousin.
(weaker)
† Active: My cousin won the contest. (stronger)
† Note, use passive voice only in the following
situations:
1. You don’t know who did an action, readers
don’t care, or you don’t want them to know.
2. You want your readers to focus on a particular
character.
3. A passive verb will help your readers move
more smoothly from one sentence to the next.
Technical
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5. Building a Complex Sentence
† Use subordination to help the main idea stand out
and to clarify relationships in sentence.
1. Janet received a grant. She wanted to study
thermal science. (Adjective clause)
† Janet, who received a grant, wanted to study
thermal science.
2. Here is a machine called a respirator. The machine
helps patients breathe. (Adjective clause)
† Here is a machine called a respirator that helps
patients breathe.
3. Sailing ships were sometimes trapped in the harbor
bay. There wasn’t enough wind to sail. (Adverb
clause)
† Sailing ships were sometimes trapped in the harbor
bay when there wasn’t enough wind to sail.Technical
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1.Add variety to your sentences in
these ways:
(1)Structure: Use a variety of clauses and
phrases within your sentence and vary their
order within the sentence. This will help you
avoid beginning each sentence in the same
way as well as help you more accurately show
the relative importance of each part of your
sentence.
(2) Length: In general, use short sentences to
emphasize ideas. Use longer sentences to
explain, define, or illustrate ideas. So, use
short, simple, and familiar for subject, the
topic of the sentence.
Technical
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A passive verb will help your readers
move more smoothly from one
sentence to the next.
† We must decide whether to improve education in the
sciences alone or raise the level of education across the
whole curriculum. Our decision will be determined by
the weight we give to industrial competitiveness as
opposed to the value we attach to the liberal arts.
† Some new questions about the nature of the universe
have been raised by scientists studying black holes in
space. A black hole is created by the collapse of dead
star into a point perhaps no larger than a marble.
† Explain: The first words in the sentence repeat what we
just read at the end of first sentence, so it will make the
sentences flow more smoothly. In other words, these
sentences are cohesive when the last few words of one
set up information that appears in the first few words of
the next.
Technical
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5. Building a Complex Sentence
4. Children are receptive to computers. They
learn about them at an early age.( Adverb
clause)
† Children are receptive to computers,
because they learn about them at an early
age.
5. Someone will arrive first. That person will
get the best seat. (Noun clause)
† Whoever arrives first will get the best seat.
Technical
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2. Add emphasis to parts of your
sentences by using:
(1.) Parallelism: Items in a series should have
the same grammatical form.
Incorrect: Three requirements for good health
are good nutrition, getting enough sleep, and
to exercise regularly.
Correct: Three requirements for good health
are good nutrition, adequate sleep, and
regular exercise.
(2. ) Repetition: Repeat ideas or words (or
words similar in meaning) to emphasize them.
Example: The child was ready to go, waiting to
go, and wanting to go.
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(4.) Structure: Arrange the wording of
the sentence to show the relative
importance of ideas.
Coordination: Show that two or more
ideas are of equal importance by using
a coordinating conjunction (for, and,
nor, but, or, yet, so) to connect words,
phrases, and clauses.
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† Subordination: Put the information you want
to emphasize in the main clause and the less
important ideas in a dependent clause or
phrase.
Example: My neighbor listened to
music while he was doing yard work.
While my neighbor was doing yard
work, he listened to music.
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4. Put key actions in verbs, not in
nouns
•Avoid using an empty verb such as have, do, make, or be to
introduce an action buried in abstract noun. For examples:
•Make a consideration －＞ Consider
•Make(=draw) a conclusion－＞Conclude
•Make a reservation of －＞ Reserve
•Make a recommendation －＞ Recommend
•Perform an assignment of －＞ Assign
•Perform an examination of －＞ Examine
•Perform simulation －＞ Simulate
•Undertake an investigation of －＞ Investigate
Technical
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Occasion using I or we
† In introduction: I will show/ argue/prove/claim
that S+V+…..
† In conclusion: We have concluded/demonstrated
that S+V+….
Note: Sometimes, the all-purpose we that refers to
people in genera, including readers.
† On the other hands, researchers rarely use the
first person for an action that others must repeat
to replicate the reported research. Those words
include “calculate”, “divide”, “examine”, “measure”,
and “weigh”.
† E.g., The coefficient of form drug was calculated.
Instead, I calculated the coefficient of the form
drug. Technical
writing 2009
To contribute to a sense of “flow”
in a sentence, we consider “order”
(5.)order
† To emphasize a part of a sentence, place it at or toward
the beginning of the sentence.
Example: Through the gate and down the road galloped
the horse. (emphasize: Through the gate and down )
† Put informations familiar to readers at the beginning
of a sentence, new information at the end.
† The loose sentence begins with the main point (an
independent clause), followed by particle phrase or
subordinate clause. The loose sentence, often seen
in a technical writing, is simpler, more nature and
direct.
Example: Several applicants arrived early this morning,
hoping to find positions as engineers.
Technical
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Examples for improving key actions.
† During the early years of the Civil War, the South’s
attempt at enlisting Great Britain on its side was
met with failure. (Weaker)
† During the early years of the Civil War, the South
attempted to enlist Great Britain on its side, but
failed.
† The promotion of creative employees is the policy
of this company.
－＞ This company promotes creative employees.
† The implementation of the plan was successful.
－＞The plan was implemented successfully.
We implemented the plan successfully.
Technical
writing 2009
5. Or, use research scholarly terms as
subject in active voice. For examples,
† The study applies a novel approach to solve
the tough problem.
† The investigation reviews that …….
† This project attempts to +V+…..
† This paper aims to +V+…
† Fig. 1 shows(=indicates) that +S+V+…
† This example illustrates that S+V+…
† This report will cover that S+V+….
† This topic involves that S+V+…
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3. Use concise wording to create
more powerful sentences.
Eliminate all grammatically unnecessary wording and
redundancy of content. Use a phrase instead of a
dependent clause or a word instead of a phrase if
you can do so without losing the effectiveness of
the sentence.
† Example 1. Omit words:
Wordy: I feel that my employer has not recognized the
fact that many of the employees of this company
feel they are ignored.
More concise: My employer has not recognized that
many of his employees feel ignored.
† Example 2. Combine words groups:
Wordy: John was frustrated and impatient; he had
waited for the bus for forty minutes, and the bus
was long overdue.
More concise: John was frustrated and impatient
owing to having waited forty minutes for the long
overdue bus. Technical
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5. Use first person pronouns
appropriately.
† Almost everyone has heard the
advice to avoid using I or we in
academic writing. In fact, It depends
and opens differ on this. Frequent
using I or we may make writing
“subjective” or “personal”. So, avoid
using them too often. On the other
hands, to make writing more actively
or lively, others encourage using I or
we.
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6. Avoid using unclear pronoun
reference.
† Common errors are the unclear use of “which”,
“this,” “that,” “these” and “those” to refer to an
antecedent in a previous clause or sentence.
† Teresa worked in a national forest last summer,
which may be her career choice.
† －＞ Teresa worked in a national forest last
summer, a forest management may be her
career choice.
† John loved public speaking, and that greatly
boosted his popularity.
－＞John loved public speaking, and his speech
greatly boosted his popularity.
Technical
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