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GENUINE MOTIV TION


NOV 2010 YOUNG CHRISTIAN MAN

SOUL HYDRATION
Been Techno Lost?
HOW TO OUTSMART GPS

THE RELIGION OF MASCULINITY:


WHY MEN HATE CHURCH
The Method to God’s Madness
YOUNG
CHRISTIAN
MAN
04 Feature Article: Why Men Hate Church
DAVID MURROW

06 On The Couch: Cyclical Sadness


Randy kosloski

08 Can You Relate: Soul Hydration


thom mollohan

10 May God Bless the Hell Out of You: The Method to God’s Madness
The Merry Monk

14 Press On: Paradigm Shift


will dole

16 The Recap: Ten Percent Can Change Your Life


Kimberly Schluterman

16 The Toolbox: Been Techno-Lost? How to Outsmart GPS …


Jeffrey Bridgman
a publication of On My Own now Ministries www.onmyownnow.com
Visit our Archives to View Past Issues of Genuine Motivation

NOVEMBER2010
Editor In Chief / Rob Beames
Art + Creative Director / MIKE MURO & DANIELA BERMÚDEZ
WHY MEN
HATE CHURCH
« BY DAVID MURROW »

C liff is a man’s man. On the job he’s known as a go-getter


and a very hard worker. He’s a good provider who loves
his wife and kids. He’s well respected by his neighbors. Cliff
drives a humongous four-wheel-drive pickup. He loves the
outdoors and takes every opportunity for a little hunting and
fishing. He enjoys a cold beer and a dirty joke. He does not
go to church.

Ask him why he doesn’t go to church, and he’ll offer up words


like boring, irrelevant and hypocrite. But the real reason Cliff
doesn’t go to church is that he’s already practicing another
religion. That religion is masculinity.

The ideology of masculinity has replaced Christianity as


the true religion of men. We live in a society with a female
religion and a male religion: Christianity, of various sorts,
for women and non-masculine men; and masculinity . . .
for men.

Cliff practices his religion with a single-mindedness


the Pharisees would envy. His work, his hobbies, his
entertainment, his follies, his addictions, everything he
does is designed to prove to the world he is a man. His
religion also demands that he avoid anything that might call
his manhood into question. This includes church, because
Cliff believes deep in his heart that church is something for
women and children, not men.

Cliff is not alone. Men have believed this for centuries. In


the 1800s, Charles Spurgeon said, “There has got abroad a
notion, somehow, that if you become a Christian you must
sink your manliness and turn milksop.” Cliff sees Christianity
as incongruous with his manhood. It’s a women’s thing.

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With so much female presence and
participation, the church has gained a
reputation as a ladies’ club in the minds
of men.

CHURCH ...A WOMEN’S THING? Male pastors come and go, but faithful women provide a
matriarchal continuity in our congregations. Women are the
I can just imagine what you’re thinking: Church is not a devoted ones who build their lives around their commitments
women’s thing—it’s a men’s thing! It certainly looks that to Christ and His church. Women are more likely to teach
way, doesn’t it? After all, a man and His male disciples and volunteer in church and are the greatest participants in
founded Christianity, most of its major saints and heroes Christian culture. The sad reality in many churches today
were men, men penned all of the New Testament books, all is this: the only man who actually practices his faith is the
of the popes were men, all of the Catholic priests are men, pastor.
and 95 percent of the senior pastors in America are men.
Feminists have been telling us for years that the church is With so much female presence and participation, the church
male dominated and patriarchal. Are they right? has gained a reputation as a ladies’ club in the minds of
men. Cliff does not attend church for the same reason he
The answer is yes and no. The pastorate is a men’s club. does not wear pink: neither is proper to his gender. Does
But almost every other area of church life is dominated by Cliff know why he hates going to church? No. Can he offer
women. Whenever large numbers of Christians gather, men a detailed explanation of his feelings? Of course not. He’s
are never in the majority. Not at revivals. Not at crusades. a guy, remember? Cliff knows one thing: he hates going to
Not at conferences. Not at retreats. Not at concerts. With church.
the exception of men’s events and pastoral conferences,
can you think of any large gathering of Christians that
attracts more men than women? HOW THE GENDER GAP AFFECTS
Visit the church during the week, and you’ll find most of the WOMEN
people working there are female. Drop in on a committee Connie is a lifelong Episcopalian, a fifty-six-year-old
meeting, and you’ll find a majority of the volunteers are mother of four boys. She says, “None of my sons goes to
women—unless it’s that small bastion of male presence, church anymore. Two of them are divorced, and now all
the building committee. Look over the leadership roster: the four are living with their lady friends. It’s sad.” Bernice from
pastor is likely to be a man, but at least two-thirds of the Connecticut says, “I have a large extended family. Not one
ministry leaders will be women. Examine the sign-up sheets of the men goes to Mass, let alone confession.” Vicki’s
for volunteer work, prayer, Sunday school, and nursery duty. husband, Ron, attends their local Baptist church. “But he’s
You’ll be lucky to see more than a couple of men’s names a total hypocrite,” she states. “He screams all the way to
on these lists. One pastor recently told me, “If it weren’t for church. Once he’s inside the sanctuary, he puts on a smile
the postman, every visitor to the church during the week and plays ‘Mr. Charming.’ Why won’t he let God change
would be a woman.” him?” Caroline is a twenty-nine-year-old single woman who

GM : 05
won’t date non-Christian men. “But I’m beginning to rethink doesn’t enthrall me like it does her.”
that,” she admits. “I go to a small Pentecostal church. There
are no single guys my age. This man at work was pursuing Who is being touched by the gospel today? Women.
me, so I told him our first date would have to be church. He Women’s ministries, women’s conferences, women’s Bible
came, but I think it freaked him out. He never called again.” studies, and women’s retreats are ubiquitous in the modern
church. Men’s ministry, if it even exists, might consist of an
Connie, Bernice, Vicki, and Caroline know from personal occasional pancake breakfast and an annual retreat.
experience: the modern church is having trouble reaching
men. Women comprise more than 60 percent of the typical How did a faith founded by a Man and His twelve male
adult congregation on any given Sunday. At least one-fifth disciples become so popular with women, but anathema
of married women regularly worship without their husbands. to men? The church of the first century was a magnet to
There are quite a few single women but hardly any single males. Jesus’ strong leadership, blunt honesty, and bold
men in church today. Every day it gets harder for single action mesmerized men. A five-minute sermon by Peter
Christian women to find men for romance or marriage. resulted in the conversions of three thousand men.
Step into any church parking lot, and you’re likely to see an
Today’s church does not mesmerize men; it repels them.
attractive young mother and her brightly scrubbed children
Just 35 percent of the men in the United States say they
scurrying to Sunday school. Mom may be wearing an
attend church weekly. In Europe male participation rates are
impressive diamond ring on her left hand, but the man who
much worse, in the neighborhood of 5 percent. This hardly
gave it to her is nowhere to be seen.
sounds like a male-dominated, patriarchal institution to me.

What’s worse, nobody seems to care about the absence of


WHERE ARE THE MANLY MEN? men. Have you ever heard a sermon on the church’s gender
gap? I’ve never heard a pastor or church leader bring it up.
Although males have not completely abandoned the church, Heck, I’ve never heard anybody bring it up. It’s just one of
manly men like Cliff have all but disappeared. Tough, those things Christians don’t talk about.
earthy, working guys rarely come to church. High achievers,
alpha males, risk takers, and visionaries are in short supply.
Fun-lovers and adventurers are also underrepresented
in church. These rough-and-tumble men don’t fit in with
WHO’S TO BLAME FOR THE GENDER
the quiet, introspective gentlemen who populate the
GAP?
church today. The truth is, most men in the pews grew For decades those few people who noticed the gender gap
up in church. Many of these lifers come not because they have assumed that men are to blame for it. Sometimes they
desire to be transformed by Christ but because they enjoy are. Many men intentionally reject the Christian faith. Some
participating in comforting rituals that have changed little men are proud and want to be their own God. Men hate to
since their childhood. There are also millions of men who admit weakness or neediness. Millions are captive to sin,
attend services under duress, dragged by a mother, wife, or unbelief, and other religions that preclude commitment to
girlfriend. Today’s churchgoing man is humble, tidy, dutiful, Christ. Men get distracted by the concerns of this world and
and above all, nice. lose interest in spiritual matters. Men suffer abuse at the
hands of church people and fall away.
What a contrast to the men of the Bible! Think of Moses
and Elijah, David and Daniel, Peter and Paul. They were But let’s be honest—women grapple with these same
lions, not lambs—take-charge men who risked everything issues. Women are just as susceptible to sin, atheism,
in service to God. They fought valiantly and spilled blood. other religions, and pride. There’s nothing in the Bible to
They spoke their minds and stepped on the toes of religious suggest that women are more virtuous or less sinful than
people. They were true leaders, tough guys who were feared men. Women are just as likely to have father issues or be
and respected by the community. All of these men had two victims of abuse. So why do women seem drawn to the
things in common: they had an intense commitment to God, church when men are not? What’s the difference?
and they weren’t what you’d call saintly.
Let me be blunt: today’s church has developed a culture
Such men seldom go to church today. that is driving men away. Almost every man in America has
tried church, but two-thirds find it unworthy of a couple of
Furthermore, of the men who do attend church, most
hours once a week.
decline to invest themselves in the Christian life as their
wives and mothers do. The majority of men attend services
and nothing more. Jay is such a man. He’s in church most
Sundays, but he’s not very excited about it. “I go mainly for A wise Texan once told me, “Men don’t
my kids and my wife,” he says. “Church is okay, but it really go to church ’cuz they’ve been.”

GM : 06
When men need spiritual sustenance, they go to the
wilderness, the workplace, the garage, or the corner bar.
ABOVE ALL, DON’T DESPAIR!
They watch their heroes in the stadium or on the racetrack. As you read the dire statistics on male participation, don’t
They plunge into a novel or sneak off to a movie. Church is panic! This low ebb may be part of the church’s natural
one of the last places men look for God. cycle. Over time the church tends to get out of balance and
lose its masculine spirit. Then God raises a lion—a Martin
More than 90 percent of American men believe in God, and Luther, John Wesley, Charles Finney, or Billy Sunday—to
five out of six call themselves Christians. But only two out drag the church back into balance. The men return. The
of six attend church on a given Sunday. The average man great revivals of the past three centuries always transformed
accepts the reality of Jesus Christ, but fails to see any value large numbers of men.
in going to church.

Men’s disinterest in Christianity is so consistent around


the world, it can’t be explained by pride, father issues, God has balanced His church many
sin or distraction. Neither can we say, “Well, men are just times before. He will do so again.
less religious,” because this is untrue. Male and female
participation are roughly equal in Judaism, Buddhism
and Hinduism. In the Islamic world men are publicly and
unashamedly religious—often more so than women. Of the Our job is to confront the current gender gap for what it is:
world’s great religions, only Christianity has a consistent, a strategy of the evil one to weaken the church. We need
nagging shortage of male practitioners. What is it about to understand what causes the gap and have the courage
modern Christianity that is driving men away? to remove the barriers that discourage and demoralize
men. God will call men back to Himself. Will the church be
ready?
NOW FOR SOME GOOD NEWS Dream for a moment. What would church be like if the
Can the church turn the tide with men? Yes! It not only can, majority of the worshippers were men? Not just males taking
but it must. Jesus built His church on twelve Spirit-filled men up pew space, but strong, earthy men who were truly alive
who changed the world. We must do the same: you cannot in Christ. Men who were there not just to please their wives,
have a thriving church without a core of men who are true to fulfill religious tradition, or to go on a power trip, but men
followers of Christ. If the men are dead, the church is dead. who were there to rock their world. Can you even imagine
what that would feel like? Imagine what such a church could
Fortunately, pioneering churches and parachurch accomplish for the kingdom of God!
organizations are enjoying remarkable success in reaching
men for Christ. New forms of worship and ministry tailored Impossible you say? Just read the book of Acts. The church
to the needs of men are springing up in the unlikeliest was like this once; it can be so again.
places. Some of the fastest-growing churches in America
are also those most successful in reaching men. To learn Here’s how I see it: imagine a ship leaving England for New
more about these ministries, visit my Web site, www. York. If that ship is just a couple of degrees off course for
churchformen.com. the entire journey, it will land in Boston instead of the Big
Apple. This is where most churches are today—a couple of
Can your church turn the tide with men? Yes! Many of the degrees off course. We’re doing the things Jesus told us to
needed changes cannot be imposed from above, but must do. Great things are happening in many areas of the world.
bubble up from the congregation itself. Too often it’s not But we need a few gentle course corrections to bring men
what the leadership imposes but what the laity demands back. Only then will we reach the goal Christ laid out for us.
that causes the church to repel men. If your church has a The longer we wait, the more drastic the corrections will
large gender gap, it’s probably not the pastor’s fault. The need to be.
people in the pews hold the steering wheel on this one. In
my book, Why Men Hate Going to Church, I suggest dozens
of ways to make your congregation more attractive to men.
Your job is to read, pray, and take action wherever you can.
Individual churchgoers have more influence than they think.

Excerpted with permission of the author from the book entitled Why Men Hate Going to Church copyright © 2005 by David Murrow. All rights reserved.

GM : 07
on
the
couch
Cyclical Sadness
by Randy Kosloski
FOR I KNOW THE PLANS I HAVE FOR YOU ... PLANS TO PROSPER YOU
AND NOT HARM YOU, PLANS TO GIVE YOU HOPE AND A FUTURE.
JEREMIAH 29:11

I once knew a man, Don, who was having a mid-life crisis at ample freedom, money, and time could be so unhappy? He
the age of 21. Don had a liberal amount of disposable income, must have understood at some level that he was wasting away
a lot of time on his hands, good friends and a close family. his gifts along with his life.
Nonetheless, he was unfulfilled, but didn’t even realize it. All
he knew was that he was depressed. Life is precious. At some level I think that everyone
understands this. But we often lose sight of this fact: Life
Generally speaking, men often seem to be “emotionally involves everyone around us, so if we isolate ourselves, it is
constipated.” Many men feel emotions they dislike, and at not life anymore. If it’s anything at all, perhaps it’s just a slow
some level they know the root cause of those emotions, comfortable death. Don probably could have been a good
but they are often too invested in the issue to appropriately father, a good career man, a good missionary, but he chose to
address it. The root of the problem can easily cause them to live life by taking as much out of it as he could while putting
question their values, beliefs and fundamental life choices. as little of himself back into it as possible.
As men, we typically have too much pride to accept that we
may be wrong about such elemental parts of ourselves. So,
we frequently contort our emotions to make it easier for us “Life is precious. At some level I think that
to believe that the root cause stems from other people and
not something within us. This seems to make sense, but since everyone understands this. But we often
we haven’t directly dealt with what is actually causing the
particular emotion, it returns again and again. This process
lose sight of this fact: Life involves everyone
makes it simple for us to justify, for example, getting angry at
others.
around us, so if we isolate ourselves, it is
not life anymore.
In Don’s case, the emotion that kept surfacing was sadness.
Don was smart enough to understand that there was
something wrong in his life. He could not explain his sadness In his book, Submerge: Living Deep in a Shallow World:
since he had everything a person usually wants in life. So he Service, Justice and Contemplation Among the World’s
hoped a counselor could solve all his problems, and right all Poor, John Hayes writes about the importance of completely
his plans. investing in our calling. He advises that if we stick only a toe
in the pool of life while drawing out as much as possible, our
In Jeremiah 29:11, the Lord declares, “For I know the plans I reward will be a lonely life full of regret and sadness. For
have for you...plans to prosper you and not harm you, plans men, we will likely convince ourselves that our sadness is
to give you hope and a future.” When we make our plans, actually anger and that we are angry because of something
however, they often look more like Don’s plans than what the someone else has done to us. Then we can allow ourselves to
Lord has in store for us. Don’s plans were selfish, designed for feel anger toward that person making things seem safe and
comfort and void of challenge. His plans did not give him hope uncomplicated. Unfortunately, in only a short time, we’ll end
or a future, but left him feeling depressed, dissatisfied and up again in sadness.
alone.
Jesus tells us that with the faith the size of a mustard seed,
For example, Don felt it would be a waste of time to achieve we can move mountains. Maybe if we lack the faith to believe
a post secondary education, so he took a job immediately out Jesus, Dr. Seuss can help. In his book, Oh, The Places You’ll
of high school. Since he did not really have any aspirations, Go, Dr. Seuss encourages us saying, “Your mountain is
he didn’t waste any time pursuing them. Later, he was able waiting, so...get on your way.” Seriously, we know that Jesus
to buy a house in a strong market. When Don came to see is the only one who can help us fully invest in our calling, and
me, he was already making good money and well on his way since He promises us a future full of hope, what’s stopping us
to paying off his house—but he was miserable. He provided from taking that promise to the bank? Trusting in His plans,
many examples to describe his life, such as, while constantly we can avoid the hopeless cycle of a self-centered life, and get
watching NBA games from the front row, he only wanted to on our way.
go home and sleep. How is it possible that a young man with

GM : 09
CAN YOU RELATE

SOUL
HYDRATION
BY THOM MOLLOHAN

In some places in the world, good drinking water is taken


for granted (I say as I clear my throat and nod subtly in
the direction of the closest drinking fountain.) In many
South American, African and Asian countries, drinkable
water is a rare commodity—if water is available at all,
mud and disease are tolerated along with it. Most of
us would be would be appalled by the water some are
forced to drink.

I have friends who have been called by God to serve in


some of those places. In the midst of poverty and spiritual
oppression, these friends dig wells for communities
suffering from drought conditions, where agriculture is
nearly impossible. As they help those in want of physical
water, they often find that the Holy Spirit provides them
opportunities to lead some to the ultimate wellspring
of “spiritual water”—healthy, wholesome, and pure
(see John 7:37-38). In places where water is not taken
for granted, the analogy of Living Water captures the
attention.

As water is vital to the human body, relationships are


essential to the human soul. And just as the water quality
has direct bearing on our overall physical health, so too
the quality of our relationships influences the health of
our soul.

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There is no relationship as important as the one for which When we find ourselves in such uncomfortable social
we were actually made: an ongoing loving relationship situations, it helps to keep in mind that we are not alone.
with God through Jesus Christ. If that relationship is not The world around us has been reeling from the horror
what it was intended to be, then none of our relationships of such brokenness from its infancy. It all began with
will be fully satisfying. Jesus Christ needs to be first in Adam and Eve’s broken fellowship with God, it continued
our plans, our hopes and our dreams. through the first murder of Abel, and is rapid among us
today. No matter who shares the majority of the fault,
While this is true, we have also been designed to need we shouldn’t feel like our situation is unique to us. We all
one another: “It is not good for the man to be alone” (Gen hurt other people from time to time, and we all get hurt
2:18). We need the company of others, and we crave by someone else.
their good opinion of us. We depend on one another in
both social and physical endeavors. Nothing underscores It’s also beneficial in these times to make sure that we
the importance of our relationships more than the fact humbly seek God and ask Him to help us reconcile to
that nearly the entire Bible deals with it in some fashion. the other party, as much as it depends on us. This most
From the Ten Commandments to the work of Jesus, God likely will mean that we apologize for our part in the
delineates how we should relate to Him, as well as how rift, and that we make right what we can. God is even
we should relate to others. Through the atoning work on more interested than we are in bridging our broken
the cross, Jesus has given us a relationship with Him and relationships.
fellowship with each another. As 1 John 1:3 tells us, “We
proclaim to you what we have seen and heard, so that Sometimes, however, others are not interested in
you also may have fellowship with us. And our fellowship fixing the relationship. Sometimes we can be a victim
is with the Father and his Son, Jesus Christ.” of unwarranted attacks by those who should love and
support us. Again, we can be reassured that we are not
Relationships are great sources of encouragement and the only ones to have experienced this kind of injustice.
empowerment to us. But like bad water, they can also Psalm 55:13 captures this common occurrence: “If an
leech our health and wholesomeness, and in some cases, enemy were insulting me, I could endure it; if a foe were
they can completely destroy our lives. What was said of raising himself against me, I could hide from him. But it
the little girl with the little curl can aptly be applied to is you, my close friend, with whom I once enjoyed sweet
relationships: “When they are good, they are very good. fellowship as we walked with the throng at the house of
And when they are bad, they are horrid.” God.”

Healthy relationships take time, trust, honesty and As common as it may be, it still can hurt deeply. While
old-fashioned hard work. Neglect them, and they can it is true, that we have been designed for relationships,
deteriorate into acid pools of frustration which can ruin the one relationship that sustains us when all others have
us and damage others. With the help of Christ, our been drowned in the raging waters of disaster is our
relationships can truly bring honor to God. This can be relationship with God. So, take heart. Jesus loves us too
said of friendships, courtships and family relationships. much to abandon us although those very dear to us may
Even business associations should be avenues of grace do so. He will remain faithful to us, even if our friends
for God’s love and power to flow through us and into the or family desert us. Fortunately, it is the one relationship
lives of others. that is not founded on our efforts, our successes, or
even our own personal worth. It is based on the love
But what do we do when, in spite of all our efforts, a and righteousness of Jesus Christ Himself. We can let the
relationship breaks down and turns frustrating? What healing water of His love soothe our weary souls as we
can be done when the yeast of discontentedness and trust His promise to love us and keep His own forever.
miscommunication filter into the dough of the relationship Even through the driest times in our lives, Jesus can keep
from the broken world around us? Sometimes it seems our souls well hydrated.
relationships can become only capable of producing
pain and sadness. Thousands of books still have not
thoroughly addressed this topic, but here are a couple
ways to approach relationships which have turned sour.

Relationships are great sources of encouragement and empowerment to us.


But like bad water, they can also leech our health and wholesomeness, and
in some cases, they can completely destroy our lives.
GM : 11
THE METHOD TO GOD’S

MADNESS
MAY GOD BLESS THE HELL OUT OF YOU
BY THE MERRY MONK

God is not fair, as we understand fair. If He was, everyone would get what they
really deserve. Instead, He’s bend-over-backward generous. He even seems to shove
His generosity in our faces. Sometimes this divine version of reality seems devoid of
common sense. Compared to our methods, the kingdom of God could be called, “Crazy
Upside Down Jesus World.”

Here’s what I mean. Let’s say I need some landscaping done, so I go to the local day
laborer center and hire anyone standing around. We agree to $100 for a day’s work.
After couple hours of hard work, it doesn’t look like we’ll get everything done by
quitting time, so I go back to the same place to get more workers. After a couple more
hours, I realize those aren’t enough, so I get more. After a couple more hours, my
yard begins to look like an ant colony with workers swarming all over pulling bushes,
planting trees, laying sod, hauling decorative rocks, building planters, etc. Finally, it
looks like we are going to finish by the end of the day, so I run out to get the guys
some chicken and beers to show my appreciation. With about an hour of daylight
left, I’m returning home with the eats and happen to pass the day laborer center. I’m
surprised to see a group of men who are just arriving. What slackers, showing up at
the end of the day looking for work probably after partying all night. I wonder if they
are even looking for work, or just want to hook up with their friends, who actually did
get their butts out of bed. I pull over and ask them why they’re standing around.

They say, “Look man, we’ve been standing here all day and nobody hired us.”

I know they’re full of it, but I have plenty of cash and they look like they could use a
break. So, I hire them and we haul back home. After another hour of work, everything
is done, so they all line up for their money. Of course, the “slackers” are first in line
with beers in hand licking their fingers clean of fried chicken. I hand them each $100

GM : 12
as promised. They’re happy. The same transaction is If He were interested in punishing us for the evil in
completed with the next guys, and the next. About our hearts, death and destruction would be in order. It
now, the last group is thinking they’ll get more since seems God did that kind of thing in the Old Testament
they worked all day. They walk right up to me with as He set the stage to receive the punishment
their hands out, but they each get $100. They look at humanity deserved. That’s done, so He’s not mad at
me like townspeople ready to attack Frankenstein with us anymore. He spent all His anger on Jesus; there’s
shovels and pitchforks. none left for us. God was never interested in wiping us
out, but rather in steering us toward home. He wants
“Hey, you agreed to $100 for a day’s work,” I reply. us to repent, so He blesses us. If that doesn’t work, He
“That’s a good wage. If I want to give the last group continues to bless—even more. We might say God will
that came to work the same as I gave you...it’s a free bless the hell out of us, if that’s what it takes.
country. Can’t I do what I want with my own money?
Charles Spurgeon once wrote: “When I thought God
Jesus tells a similar story in Matthew 20:1-16. He was hard, I found it easy to sin; but when I found God
concludes by saying that in the kingdom of heaven, so kind, so good, so overflowing with compassion, I
the last are first and the first are last. What! You’re smote upon my breast to think that I could ever have
kidding! That’s not fair! Who would pay good money to rebelled against One who loved me so, and sought my
guys who don’t deserve it and then shove that fact in good.”
the faces of the guys who worked the hardest? That’s
only one example of God’s generosity. So, while it’s not what we expect, Jesus continually
taught that it’s the way of the kingdom of heaven.
There’s also the rebellious son who squanders all his Although we can’t work so hard that it puts God in our
dad’s money on hookers and booze. What does he get debt, we also can’t be bad enough to cause Him to
when he comes home: new clothes and a party, while punish us—He’s already punished Christ.
his brother works in the field. It seems the religious
folks always get a tongue lashing from Jesus while the Romans 4:4-5 says, “Now when a man works, his
drunks, outcasts and whores get the kingdom. The wages are not credited to him as a gift, but as an
meek inherit the earth. The persecuted are blessed. obligation. However, to the man who does not work
It’s all scandalous! but trusts God who justifies the wicked, his faith is
credited as righteousness.”
In the real world, we work, so we get paid. We study
hard, so we get an “A.” If we do bad stuff, we get This doesn’t mean there aren’t consequences for the
punished. If we do good, we get rewarded. However, stupid things we do. We also all live in a fallen world.
God’s ways are certainly not our ways. But we don’t want to confuse that stuff with God’s
eternal punishment. There’s no punishment left after
the cross, for those who have accepted Christ.

However, He does want to bless the hell out of us.


“IF HE WERE INTERESTED IN PUNISHING This is obviously great news for the slackers who show
up hung over for an hour of work, for they’ll get paid
US FOR THE EVIL IN OUR HEARTS, just as much as those who worked all day. It’s great

DEATH AND DESTRUCTION


WOULD BE IN ORDER.”
news for the prodigals who return home to a party
after spending dad’s money on sinful living. But, for
the older brother and the guys working in the field all
day, it’s a tough pill to swallow.

It’s doesn’t seem fair, but that’s how the kingdom


of heaven works. As He loves us, we become more
So, why does all of this insane kindness go to the loving. As He indiscriminately accepts us, we become
worst of us? This may sound strange, but it’s a way more indiscriminately accepting. As He blesses us, we
of correcting us. Romans 2:4 says, “Or do you show become a blessing to others. May God bless the hell
contempt for the riches of His kindness, tolerance, out of us all!
and patience, not realizing that God’s kindness leads
you toward repentance?” Clearly, God isn’t “out to get
us” by using cancer or earthquakes, getting us fired,
wrecking our cars, or taking away family members.
That’s how the pagan gods do it, but not Yahweh. N

GM : 13
THE RECAP
on THE TOTAL MONEY MAKEOVER

10% can change


your life
By Kimberly Schluterman

Can I brag? My husband and I are both really good book nonetheless kicked our butts. Although almost
with money management. So good, in fact, that in 90 percent of the book was stuff we already knew, the
our premarital counseling, we had no issues to work 10 percent that wasn’t has changed our lives.
through whatsoever. We both practiced good habits as
individuals and we have no problems practicing them Below is an overview of the principles in the book,
together. This is what we said to my friend-mentors and I would encourage you to consider its wisdom.
as we stood in their dining room one evening. They Ramsey is a Christian, but this book is not about
listened happily, congratulated us on our smart choices, Christian finances, per se. His wisdom is, however,
and then did what mentors do best: challenged us old-fashioned and sensible. The program he lays out
to be even better. Dr. Bob asked if we had ever read is simple and straight-forward, but for the person of
a book called The Total Money Makeover by Dave average self-discipline, kind of tough to follow.
Ramsey. No, we hadn’t and we didn’t want to read it
The Dave Ramsey financial plan is broken down into
either, especially not six weeks before our wedding!
seven “baby steps.” Steps 4, 5, and 6 include saving
We hemmed and hawed but finally, they talked us into
for college, quickly paying off your home mortgage,
reading just the first chapter. If we weren’t hooked
and investing for retirement. Since those are way
after the first chapter, we were off the hook for having
down the road for both you and me, I’ll let you read
to read it.
the book and learn about those yourself. I want to talk
So that’s what we did. And that’s all we did for about about 1-3 and 7. In general, the book assumes the
12 weeks. It wasn’t so easy to dismiss, however. reader is the average American, meaning you have
Some of the concepts lingered in our minds, and we debt (car, students loans, credit cards). If you’re not
ended up wanting to read the rest together. And the in debt, then you’re ahead of the game and the Dave
result was surprising. For two people who consider plan will teach you how to never be a slave to money.
themselves advanced personal money managers, that

GM : 14
Baby Step 1. Baby Step 3.
Quickly save $1,000. I was surprised by this because I Finish building your emergency fund. Right now, you
thought he’d want us to pay down debt before saving have $1,000 stashed away and no debt. That same
money, but his reasoning is reasonable. Essentially, amount that you were paying toward your debt each
if you don’t have some money stashed away for month will now be added to your Emergency Fund.
emergencies—which are as certain as death and If you had been paying a car payment, credit cards
taxes—then you will go into debt again in order to pay and maybe a student loan, all of those payments you
for them. The quick $1000 is the first step in breaking no longer have to make and can now apply toward
the debt cycle. Ramsey gives specific rules about where saving will build your emergency fund quickly. Most
to keep the money, but to summarize, he wants it on- financial advisors recommend having 3-6 months of
hand but tucked away. It needs to be something you life expenses in the bank. Personally, in this economy, I
can put your fingers on today if necessary, but also feel more comfortable with 9-12, but it’s your decision.
something that you’re not going to lay your fingers
on unless it is absolutely imperative. A Certificate of I’m going to skip Steps 4-6, but I’m going to be a plot
Deposit that has an early withdrawal fee is not the spoiler and let you in on Baby Step 7: Build wealth and
place for your $1,000, but neither is your wallet. give! One of the best parts of wealth, besides peace of
mind and security, is being able to give it away. Have
If you are reading this and thinking, “Ha—a thousand you noticed that poor people can’t help poor people
dollars might as well be a million!” then I beg you to much? Although the Lord loves a sacrificial giver, he
read just the first chapter like I was “forced” to do. has no problem with wealth. Remember: the love of
It’ll change your outlook and your life. The key is to money is the root of evil—not money itself.
get the money quick, like within a month or two. Sell
things, and unplug everything that uses electricity if The Total Money Makeover spends a lot of time
you must, but save that $1,000! teaching you about myths and not-so-secret secrets
about money management. He rants about bad money
habits—and he should know, he had a bunch—and why
Baby Step 2. they will leave you a slave to debt forever. Ramsey
provides information on where to invest, how much to
Pay down what Ramsey calls the “debt snowball.” invest and strategies for success. It is not a get-rich-
Whereas, I would have thought that if you have quick scheme, rather it is a get-rich-slowly plan.
multiple creditors, the smart thing to do would be to
start with the highest interest rate, pay it aggressively, As you become financially independent and rely less
and then move to the next highest interest rate, on your parents for financial support, you will probably
Ramsey suggests otherwise. He says to start with run across all kinds of “financial advice.” A lot of what
the lowest balance, pay it aggressively while paying you hear may be really, really bad advice—and certainly
minimum balances on all other debt, and then move to not grounded in God’s word. Although, I wouldn’t say
the next lowest. Similar to the $1,000 quick cash, the that the Dave Ramsey plan is the only smart plan out
goal is to change your behavior. It’s a baby step. If you there, I would encourage you to read the book and
aggressively pay off your lowest-balance debt, then decide for yourself. Who knows? It might completely
it should pay off quickly. Then you’re motivated and change your financial outlook, like it did mine.
encouraged to keep going! Take everything that you
were paying on your lowest balance, which is now paid
in full, and apply it to the second lowest balance. It
snowballs from there until your debt is paid off quicker
than you ever thought.

Depending on your debt, it might take a couple years


to make it through Baby Step 2. But once you have,
you’ve accomplished something major. Yes, it is
difficult to sacrifice for so long, but Ramsey’s motto
is, “If today you will live like no one else, later you can
live like no one else.”

GM : 15
R
Paradigm Shift
PRESS ON

BY WILL DOLE

Have you ever been around an extreme attention magnet?


You know, the type of person who sucks in attention like
a black hole consumes anything in the universe falling
within its intense gravitational pull? Maybe it’s the loud
person who never uses an inside voice, or the flamboyant
dresser, or someone cruising with car stereo blasting such
that it rattles our bones. Most of us know an attention
magnet; perhaps some of us even fit this description.

GM : 16
To some extent we are all self absorbed. Some demonstrate It is no mistake to say God is extremely passionate
this by demanding attention; others exhibit selfishness about us as individuals. He cares enough about us to
by extreme isolation. Most of us are somewhere between have planned our salvation thousands of years before
these two extremes with a human nature that is bent on our existence. After the fall of mankind,we immediately
its own pleasure, happiness, gain and fulfillment. Yet, we read in Genesis about the prophecy that a Savior will
don’t like to think of ourselves as selfish. Perhaps what’s conquer Satan. So it would seem logical to conclude
needed is a paradigm shift. If you aren’t familiar with this that God’s main purpose in sending Jesus was to save
term, Dictionary.com defines it as “a radical change in us. And indeed it was. But if God’s only purpose was
underlying beliefs or theory.” to save us, then what motivates us to struggle against
our sin? Chapter six of Romans talks continually about
We may need a radical change in the arena of our faith. the incredible grace we are given, while also pounding
Maybe we’ve bought in to the errant message of the on the necessity of remaining free from the bondage of
“Prosperity Gospel” that teaches Jesus as the way to sin. Wouldn’t it make sense for us to think, as did some
health, wealth and happiness. That one’s a hot topic, but believers in Rome, that we should sin all the more so that
there are many other subtle errant beliefs that lead right grace may abound?
back to selfishness.
God’s purpose in our salvation is not only our personal
For example, a popular pastor recently talked about eternal destination, but also His glory. God purposefully
reaching the world for Jesus, hammering repeatedly that brings glory to Himself and He alone is worthy of our
Jesus is the only hope for a better life. This is an accurate obedience. As we hold fast the truth that God did
statement when placed in the proper context, i.e. Jesus everything for us out of love, it’s easy to forget that God
is our only way to God, and therefore, He is our only did it all to glorify Himself, as well.
hope (John 14:6). Not only does Jesus offer life, but He
offers a full one (John 10:10). But is a better life a solid So, what if the Gospel is not about us? What if the
reason to evangelize? Is it even a good reason to worship Gospel is about a loving, holy and perfect God who
Jesus? created mankind in His image in order to bring glory
to the Creator? What if mankind later rebelled against
Consider the Great Commission, found in Matthew God alienating himself through sin? And what if God
28:18b-20: responded in love, although He had every right to wipe
out mankind from existence? What if, instead, He chose
“All authority in heaven and on earth has to lovingly save mankind from a sinful state by sending
His Son to die on a cross while providing freedom from
been given to me. Therefore go and make sin so that God might again be glorified?
disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the
In the midst of basking in the love and grace God has
name of the Father and of the Son and of shown to us, it’s important to remember it’s still all about
the Holy Spirit, and teaching them to obey God. Author Steve Brown points out that if the whole
world reached tAhe agreement that God is a liar, He would
everything I have commanded you. And not cease to be God. He would continue to be truth itself.
He would continue His perfect existence, and it would
surely I am with you always, to the very end all be for His glory in the end. If He had not saved us at
of the age.” all, but left us in our sin, He would still be worthy of all
praise. Nothing can change His holy essence—not even
Jesus’ appeal is not based on hope for better lives. He us. He doesn’t actually need us at all, which proves His
does not say, “You better go tell people that life’s tough love all the more amazing, considering the means He
and I’ll fix it for them.” Rather He says in verse 18 that all took to save us.
authority in heaven and earth belongs to Him—because
He is God. He follows this in verse 19 with “Therefore The continuing storyline of the Bible is really fairly simple:
go and make disciples...” Notice the word, “therefore.” God creates man to worship Him. Mankind rebels, so God
To paraphrase what He is saying, Jesus tells us: “I am saves. And when God saved us, He didn’t merely save
God. Therefore, as my followers, go and teach the world us from death and hell. He also saved us from the sin
to follow Me.” The reason that Jesus starts with His separating us from Him, in order that we may glorify Him
authority is because we do not simply worship a nice guy with our lives.
who died for us. We worship the Almighty God who, in a
display of His love, came and willingly sacrificed Himself We can easily become so intently focused on ourselves
in our place for our sins. He did this of His own free will that we miss the grandeur and the splendor of the
and in accordance with the plan He laid out before the amazing God who gave up so much to call us His own.
foundations of the world (Ephesians 1:4). We certainly weren’t created to focus on ourselves. It’s
best if we let God do the focusing on us—for He does it
so well—while we keep our focus on Him.

GM : 17
THE BEEN TECHNO LOST?

TOOL
BY JEFFREY BRIDGMAN

HOW TO OUTSMART GPS AND MAPQUEST

BOX
Is there anyone who can honestly say he’s never been
lost? Even the best of us get turned around once in a
while. But now with GPS, MapQuest and the like, getting
lost should be a thing of the past, right? Maybe not;
sometimes the tools we rely on lead us astray.

Once on a road trip with some friends, we wanted to eat


they recommend might not hold up to common sense.
And the devices often don’t take into account things like
traffic conditions and road construction projects. The
same is true for paper maps, but since they don’t have
as much information, they aren’t out of date as quickly—
when’s the last time you heard of an interstate getting
shut down for good?
lunch in a town I’d driven through several times before. I
remembered seeing a Quizno’s, but couldn’t remember Avoid being late or lost by combining two navigation
exactly where it was. No problem. My friends had GPS! mediums and don’t forget to apply common sense. I try
So we pulled it out, told it we wanted to go to Quizno’s, to determine which highways to take ahead of time and
and started following its directions. Ten minutes later it make a simple list of the interchanges. MapQuest and
gently announced: “You have reached your destination.” other step-by-step directions can be overly complex.
We looked around and we saw nothing but factories, Usually we only need to take a handful of highways that
so we keep on driving. It seemed irritated with our lack can easily be remembered or written down.
of direction-following-skills as it politely announced
“Recalculating...” I always try to keep paper maps on hand as a back-up.
Do you have a map in your car of your city or county?
On another adventure, a GPS took us on the shortest Often phone books have them in the center. This year
route to see the Gateway Arch in St. Louis. We figured when you get your new phone book, instead of throwing
the arch was downtown, so we just told it to take away the old one, put it under the driver’s seat of your
us to St. Louis. After a while we realized something car. If you’re travelling between states, stretch your
was wrong, but we continued to follow the directions. legs at the first welcome center/rest stop when you
Eventually we “arrived at our destination.” Apparently, enter a new state. Many states provide free maps at
we had arrived at the geographical center of St. Louis, their welcome centers. But that won’t do you much
which happened to be in the slums. A more reliable way good if you need directions to a specific place within
to find the Arch would have been to look and head in the a city. This is where the various online map services
general direction of the towering landmark. earn their money. Those turn-by-turn directions to our
final destination can sure come in handy—when they’re
And GPS isn’t the only fallible technology. Have you correct. Back up these directions with a phone number
ever gotten bum directions from MapQuest or Google? for your destination, so if you get lost, you can call and
A friend of mine used MapQuest to find the airport in have someone at your destination talk you in the rest of
Northwest Arkansas and was directed down two miles of the way. Visiting the boonies where you might not get
dirt road and across a one-lane bridge. Experiences like cell phone service? Then be sure to confirm the online
these can tempt us to give up on modern amenities and directions with someone at your final destination before
go back to a reliable hard copy map. you leave home.

Although online directions and GPS’s can be very Mapping technologies are cool and convenient, but
handy, they do have their limitations. Sometimes, don’t rely on them as your only recourse or you may
information can be wrong or out of date. Or we can find yourself in a 2001 Space Odyssey moment, Hal. As
easily input the wrong destination. Although GPS’s always, a little preparation and common sense can go
come with beneficial information such as the locations of a long way in helping to make smart navigation choices
businesses, these can change fairly quickly. The routes while on a trip.

GM : 18

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