School of Arts and Sciences

Bachelor of Arts in Political Science

Love, Sex, and Marriage in Ancient Mesopotamia

Joshua J. Mark

Mark, J. J. (2014, May 16). Love, Sex, and Marriage in Ancient Mesopotamia. Ancient
History Encyclopedia. Retrieved from https://www.ancient.eu/article/688/

16th of May, 2014

Submitted by:

Hya
 Marital unions in Mesopotamia were important to the society for the continuation

of the family line. Arranged marriages were completely normal, but human relationships

in Mesopotamia were just as complicated as today’s time and part of that difficulty was

love. Sex was considered just another level of their lives and there was none of the

modern-day embarrassment or taboo involved in their sex lives since. Positions when

doing sexual intercourse were adapted like standing on a chair, across the bed or the

partner, taking it from behind, and even anal intercourse. The latter was used as a

contraceptive. Also, homosexuality could be enjoyed without the fear of social stigma and

embarrassment. The goal of marriage is procreation as children were the expected

consequence of marriage. The continuance of their family line was the most important

goal since childlessness was considered bad luck. With that, the husband could not

divorce his wife because of her health condition and thus, he would continue to honor his

first wife until she dies. Monogamy was a common practice even before, a husband could

add more if he can afford and the first wife was consulted in choosing the second wives.

If the concubine had been added to the home due to infertility of the husband’s first wife,

the concubine’s offspring would become the children of the first wife. Lastly, divorce

carried a serious social stigma since it was uncommon because people married for life

even if it was an unhappy one. Divorce was commonly initiated by the husband, but wives

were allowed to divorce if there was evidence of abuse or neglect. A husband could also

divorce his wife on grounds of adultery, and if she is caught in the act, a punishment was

prepared for the wife and the other man. Divorce could occur due to neglection in both

husband and wife and they should return their properties after divorce. Both of them will

also suffer the stigma of divorce.

 In today’s time, in the contemporary world, these three are common to practice,

just like during ancient times. Love, sex, and marriage are phases of human life and every

person can step on it. Stated in the summary, love, between two persons was complicated

even before. Human relationships were not that simple to explain for they usually practice

arranged marriages which were completely normal to the said civilization. Considering

the time frame, it was also impossible to simplify the past’s concept of love. I believe that

love in the present is still in complexity that I cannot still define in finality.

Prostitution was already in the present culture and thus, even during the times of

the first civilization, they practice sexual liberation. In our country, sex was still quite a

taboo. Without proper education regarding this, long term consequences are expected to

occur. I cannot help but compare it to other countries. It was also mentioned that they

have an unusual sexual practice for contraception that in today’s time it is one of the

causes of sexually transmitted diseases and is a huge global problem today.

Homosexuality was normal and not a big deal during the Mesopotamian Civilization.

Comparing it to the present times, it is always in every mouth of the people. Today, the

idea of homosexuality is manipulated thus, lots of comments are reproduced in many

ways that I can agree to disagree. Due to the people’s negative feedback, malpractice of

preaching and showing pride of one’s orientation was noticed and vice versa. The

disrespect towards Christianity was widely shown by some of them due to the said

religion’s alleged strong opposition towards their ideology. It is still a hot cup of tea today

and it is still obvious the discussion regarding homosexuality will still go further.

Marital occasions are still to be considered as one of the most important parts of

human life. People considered it as the start of a happy ending but not everyone can
experience it due to some personal common reasons. To some, it is not necessary

anymore because of financial reasons. Together with financial problems is lack of

support, guidance and approval from both sides. Living together outside the wedlock is a

common thing. It usually happens when they reproduced a child right before they got

married. Still, these incidents are not acceptable but only tolerable. Others believe that

marriage is not necessary because it is not the essence of life fulfillment, it is just a social

construct that should be practiced by everyone. The fear of abandonment, domestic

abuse, having a high standard of relationships, or seeing a failed marriage from other

couples can also be reasons that a man or a woman feel that they should not marry.

However, in Mesopotamian marriages, many happy couples lived together happily with

their children for there was still genuine love between couples, no matter how their

marriage may have been arranged. Thus, relationships bloomed in Ancient Mesopotamia,

just like today. Although the ways of living in the Mesopotamia may not be applicable

today, the people of the ancient world were no different from those living today. Many

modern marriages, begun with great promise, end badly, while many others, which initially

struggle, endure for a lifetime. The practices which begin such unions are not as important

as what the individuals involved make of their time together and, in Mesopotamia as in

the present, marriage presented many challenges which a couple either overcame or

succumbed to.

I chose this article to clarify the typical occasions that still happens up to this day.

It is good to know that it did not sound horrible and disturbing. It might sound quite

sensitive but I think being open about this kind of topic is important to explain and compare

love, sex, and marriage using different time frames.