GoodTherapy®

< PsychPedia

Love

love-pinkLove is a complex set of emotions, behaviors, and beliefs associated with strong feelings of
affection, protectiveness, warmth, and respect for another person. Love can also be used to apply to
non-human animals, to principles, and to religious beliefs. For example, a person might say he or she
loves his or her dog, loves freedom, or loves God.

WHAT IS LOVE?

Love has been a favored topic of philosophers, poets, writers, and scientists for generations, and
different people and groups have often fought about its definition. While most people agree that love
implies strong feelings of affection, there are many disagreements about its precise meaning, and one
person’s “I love you” might mean something quite different than another’s. Some possible definitions of
love include:

A willingness to prioritize another’s well-being or happiness above your own.

Extreme feelings of attachment, affection, and need.

Dramatic, sudden feelings of attraction and respect.

A fleeting emotion of care, affection, and like.

A choice to commit to helping, respecting, and caring for another, such as in marriage or when having a
child.

Some combination of the above emotions.

There has been much debate about whether love is a choice, is something that is permanent or fleeting,
and whether the love between family members and spouses is biologically programmed or culturally
indoctrinated. Love may vary from person to person and culture to culture. Each of the debates about
love may be accurate in some time and some place. For example, in some instances, love may be a
choice while in others it may feel uncontrollable.

LOVE VERSUS LUST

Especially in the early stages of a relationship, it can be difficult to tell the difference between love and
lust. Both are associated with physical attraction and an intoxicating rush of feel-good chemicals,
coupled with an often overwhelming desire to be closer to another person, but only one is long-lasting:
love.

Love is something that is cultivated between two people and grows over time, through getting to know
him or her and experiencing life’s many ups and downs together. It involves commitment, time, mutual
trust, and acceptance.

Lust, on the other hand, has to do with the sex-driven sensations that draw people toward one another
initially and is fueled primarily by the urge to procreate. Characterized by sex hormones and idealistic
infatuation, lust blurs our ability to see a person for who he or she truly is and consequently, it may or
may not lead to a long-term relationship.

For instance, Lana is in a committed relationship with Steve and her sexual desire for him is waning. She
loves and cares for him, but she finds herself feeling restless and dissatisfied with their physical
relationship. When she meets Brendan, she experiences instant feelings of attraction and longing. The
chemical messengers in her brain start sending signals to pursue this new man, even though she does
not know anything about him other than how his presence makes her feel physically. Instead of working
to improve intimacy with her current partner, she is overcome by lust for someone new.

The ideal intimate relationship scenario, some might say, involves a balanced combination of love and
lust. After all, lusting after someone is typically an important early phase of a long-term partnership, and
reigniting that initial spark is a practice worth cultivating for committed couples.

LOVE AND MENTAL HEALTH

Although almost no one can agree on a single definition of love, most people do agree that love plays a
significant role in both physical and psychological well-being. Numerous studies have demonstrated the
benefits of love. Love’s role in mental health is far-reaching, but some examples include:

The fact that babies who are not shown love and affection in the form of frequent holding and cuddling
may be developmentally delayed or ill.

Feeling unloved is strongly correlated with feelings of low self-esteem and depression.

People who both feel loved by others and who report loving other people tend to be happier.
Love can play a role in long-term health, and feeling emotionally connected may help increase
immunity.

References:

Anonymous. (September 2, 2002). How to tell whether it’s love, like or lust. Jet 102.11, 12-14. Retrieved
from http://search.proquest.com.ez.trlib.info/docview/199970680/1833AF113A8E4DCAPQ/3?
accountid=1229

Prinz, J. J. (2007). The emotional construction of morals. Oxford: Oxford University Press.

Wilson, G. D., & McLaughlin, C. (2001). The science of love. London: Fusion Press.

Last Updated: 03-6-2017

READ MORE

Love and Food: a Recipe for Disaster? Addicted to Love: Drawn to the Rush of Romance Love Is Not
Enough: Important Considerations Before Marriage 68 comments Leave a Comment

emmanuel q.

emmanuel q.

January 1st, 2017 at 11:50 AM

i have now realize the difference between love and lust

Reply

‫چال روی گونه‬

‫چال روی گونه‬

March 7th, 2018 at 8:22 AM

I love your believs

Reply

‫چال روی لپ‬

‫چال روی لپ‬

July 20th, 2018 at 11:46 AM

i think you like to be loved

arwin c.

arwin c.

March 1st, 2019 at 6:55 AM

Love also pay lust always receive

Reply

Theodore

Theodore

June 30th, 2019 at 8:24 PM

Wow! I have really learnt from this

Brooke

Brooke

April 10th, 2017 at 11:50 AM

What is love? That’s an age old question we may never find a simple answer to. However, the effort you
made in this post is incredible. I love your writing style, and you really gave some meaningful insight.

Reply

Yogesh

Yogesh

April 30th, 2017 at 4:29 AM

I agree with this post but i personally think that love is something that drives us and keep us on a the
right path. If we are alone and have no love in our life we may not be as worried and thriving towards
better life as we do when we are concerned about people we love and giving them a good and healthy
life. Love is what comes from inside. Loved this post keep up good writing also if your are free i would
like to see your review on my blog post on the same topic : dhananjayd-mysteryoflife.blogspot.in

Reply

markjhan

markjhan

March 21st, 2018 at 7:52 AM

its better to be love than never

Eden

Eden

July 21st, 2017 at 5:53 AM

Love is what u do not what u say .it is a mutual attraction that binds two or more people together

Reply

yogesh

yogesh

May 11th, 2020 at 2:55 PM

yes……

Bright

Bright

July 24th, 2019 at 10:57 PM

Love is love, if you can love you`ll be loved.

Reply

jessica

jessica

August 14th, 2019 at 3:27 AM

Me and my boyfriend

sbadreck

sbadreck

May 16th, 2017 at 11:01 AM

wow I like this

Reply

Jo

Jo

May 27th, 2017 at 6:40 PM

Can i get lana’s number

Reply

dunno

dunno

August 29th, 2018 at 3:57 AM

did u get it ? askin fora friend

Reply
Judy

Judy

June 4th, 2017 at 11:39 AM

Wow i really love this post

Reply

Kailash

Kailash

June 7th, 2017 at 4:57 AM

it is good post.

Reply

Nicetracy

Nicetracy

June 16th, 2017 at 6:58 AM

I Love All U Guys Post.,so Let Lov Lead Since We Knw D Meaning Nw..

Reply

Anne

Anne

November 1st, 2019 at 10:56 PM

I have a dilemma for you, this is a hypothetical story, OK.

I know someone who is caring, loving, honest, reliable and committed to whatever she does, more than
anything she is likeable and staunchly protective of those close to her. She volunteers in her community
and people like and respect her, OK so far, yes, good.

Now one day she gets a request for friendship of social media, who is a male just a little younger than
her, normally she would dismiss this straight to the bin, but this time something makes her respond to
this mystery male. Now this is completely out of character for her to do this, she is a woman that has
been happily married for over 40years, why suddenly be tempted to stray from that. But she tells me as
soon as he replied to her, she knew, knew what? I asked.

She said it was weird, she just felt an unusual rush of such intense emotions and the sense of familiarity,
that she felt overwhelmed and shocked by her reaction. She had at this point not seen what he looked
like, so she felt even more confused that these feelings were for some one sight unseen. She told me
she knew it was destiny, and she felt she knew him before, and she said when they continued talking
she felt she’d come home. What I find strange is the male concerned, felt the same about her. So tell me
is it love or is it lust?

Reply

Bindu

Bindu

January 3rd, 2020 at 5:32 PM

I am very honest when I love a person but over a time feel.. I really love and care but I don’t feel like I
am loved….

Then I start thinking What is Love??

There I found and answer…. We are looking outside what we really are….. ” I AM LOVE”

and in Bible I found a word in 1 John 4-8 God is Love… If God is Love then what is Love… Love is God….

Then where is God? Within us

So where is Love within US..

We cannot find LOVE outside… Come to that awareness “I Am LOVE”..

So whatever comes from external with expectations… So we cannot explain its list od the flesh or lust of
money.. Or something else….

Truth is “I AM LOVE” when we look it outside for it, we will lose our energy and time…

What we are in this earth part of a character.. I mean.. Same time we act as Father or mother, child,
husband, colleague, Boss, according to our situation so we do live as an actor everyday… Playing the role
of a husband or wife… Children or brother or sister, friend or colleague… So whatever we feel it’s all
emotions…
LANDALES

LANDALES

April 2nd, 2020 at 6:46 AM

There is truly nothing wrong in finding your soulmate/s via social media or otherwise. Looks don’t
matter the soul knows who makes it complete. Your soulmate/s accept you completely and are happy
wen you are happy (whether that means you’re married or with another soulmate).

Convention dictates there can only be one soulmate/kismet out there. But love is exponential

If there is more than one soulmate be truthful with all concerned and if they’re your soulmate they will
accept the other in time and help strengthen everyone’s bond.

OkoAustin

OkoAustin

June 24th, 2017 at 10:45 PM

do love still exist? because I been trying to love but it seems that material things have taking love away
from this new generation rather what we experience now is lust amoung our self. inshot I so much like
this page thank you so much.

Reply

Violet

Violet

June 26th, 2017 at 8:31 AM

LOVE is impossible to define and different for everyone. That sits very well within me.

Reply

Rahninho

Rahninho

July 4th, 2017 at 8:58 PM

Well explained & now gat a primarily know of love is

Reply

Jennifer

Jennifer

July 15th, 2017 at 7:28 AM

love is something u can never express,so strong nd emotional

Reply

isaac

isaac

August 17th, 2017 at 12:12 PM

I have learnt a new aspect of love.

Reply

YUSUF

YUSUF

May 5th, 2020 at 11:47 PM

HI MY DEAR FRIEND

Reply

Sahar

Sahar

November 29th, 2017 at 7:44 AM

Im sahar and Im from Iran

This post its very intresting and I agree with this post

Reply

saeid

saeid

March 31st, 2019 at 4:40 PM

SAHAR!!! which city from IRAN?

Reply

Ahmed T

Ahmed T

December 25th, 2017 at 2:44 PM

Love’s simply an excuse to get hurt.. By it’s sweetness. I love You all_

Reply

biira

biira

June 6th, 2018 at 8:39 AM

love is understandable

Reply

vaibhav k.

vaibhav k.

January 31st, 2019 at 6:48 AM

i love your way of explaining true love..

Reply

rasheed

rasheed

February 9th, 2019 at 1:42 AM

love is life

Reply

nomfundo

nomfundo

April 3rd, 2019 at 9:23 PM

To me only blibical and love from homes makes sense because from then you’ll be able to pass it on

Reply

Laura

Laura

May 2nd, 2019 at 9:45 AM

I agree to me love is family, people I know, people I trust, people who look after me and just the people
around me that care for me!

Reply

Prince

Prince

May 15th, 2019 at 12:44 AM

I agree with this post but i personally think that love is something that drives us and keep us on a the
right path. If we are alone and have no love in our life we may not be as worried and thriving towards
better life as we do when we are concerned about people we love and giving them a good and healthy
life. Love is what comes from inside. Loved this post keep up good writing.

Reply

Brix

Brix

June 16th, 2019 at 3:27 PM

The true meaning of love is when God gave his only son for the forgives of all our sin. He is a God that
dresses himself to become a human so that He will feel what we have have felt from this earthly thing.
Now he sit at the right of His father all He ask is to forgive all those people who had sin with us. Forgive
so that we can meet the true love. Forgive your self before you gave forgiveness to others.

Reply

sophist

sophist

June 25th, 2019 at 12:17 AM

Love is what u do not what u say. It is a mutual attraction that unites two people together. There is a
major difference between love and lust. Nowadays people are considering love on the basis of attractive
looks, money, bank balance. If Love marriages are based on these criteria than people bind themselves
officially for lust and when it’s over they separate.

Reply

Winter

Winter

July 2nd, 2019 at 11:07 AM

Love is the deepest part of life, no one can reach its end. It’s the subject of the life we live.

Love is like light formed out of darkness brighten everything in every little opportunity.
Reply

Rahul

Rahul

July 5th, 2019 at 4:15 AM

love is …………

Reply

Pronamika

Pronamika

July 5th, 2019 at 6:36 AM

I am interested in your topics

Reply

Wil

Wil

August 5th, 2019 at 1:36 AM

That’s a slight bit confusing.

Reply

Wil

Wil

August 5th, 2019 at 1:43 AM

Life is a game and love is the prize

Reply
angel

angel

August 7th, 2019 at 4:22 AM

this is one of the best definition about love

Reply

VARUN

VARUN

September 2nd, 2019 at 12:30 PM

Awesome Article.

Reply

muhammad u.

muhammad u.

September 8th, 2019 at 11:13 AM

It is true but love have a large pain for follower. and i am in thin pain.

Reply

mule

mule

September 8th, 2019 at 12:03 PM

Love is to adjust your principles and become vulnerable.

Love is to love no matter whether the idiot loves you back

Love is a process of losing ur brians to emotions.

Reply

Krishnendu D

Krishnendu D

September 15th, 2019 at 11:51 AM

This article is very nice… good explain what is love? Good website

Reply

Geaniece M

Geaniece M

September 23rd, 2019 at 1:27 AM

Now I know what love really is.

Reply

Jarvis

Jarvis

October 13th, 2019 at 2:15 PM

The difference between love and lust.. hmmm wow interesting I just hope I get help cause I really need
to stop lusting over people

Reply

Pop

Pop

May 14th, 2020 at 4:39 PM

I didnt know that artifical intelligence could lust

Reply
Kf

Kf

November 14th, 2019 at 1:16 AM

Love is about how much you can sacrifice for others. Can you sacrifice your favourite tv show to
accompany your partner to go shopping etc? If someone can sacrifice their life for their loved ones, that
is ultimate true love.

Reply

Soubhagya Behera

Soubhagya Behera

December 12th, 2019 at 2:39 AM

It is helpful.

Reply

ajay

ajay

December 16th, 2019 at 8:14 AM

Nice Article. I really like this.

You may like this.

Reply

Rohan

Rohan

December 18th, 2019 at 7:32 AM

It’s just a chemical reaction that compels animals to procreate from science point of view just like the
article I mentioned states but well, people can define their own meaning of love
Reply

Tesfaye

Tesfaye

December 30th, 2019 at 12:33 AM

what is love?

it is an inprofed ! it imposebel to give defination!

Reply

mery

mery

January 16th, 2020 at 12:35 PM

Love is the deepest part of life, no one can reach its end. It’s the subject of the life we live.

Love is like light formed out of darkness brighten everything in every little opportunity.

Reply

https://modto.ir/

https://modto.ir/

February 5th, 2020 at 4:49 AM

You always gain by

Giving love.

Reply

rocky

rocky
February 5th, 2020 at 7:30 PM

Thanks sir share this information. I really helpful this article. I read full content. Thanks you so much..

Reply

Alicia

Alicia

February 17th, 2020 at 8:58 PM

I believe that love is a choice. I am currently going through a divorce. I was recently questioned about
whether or not I really ever loved my husband. After giving the question some thought, I came to the
conclusion that love is a choice. It begins as lust, as you said, and grows through mutual respect and
trust. As long as my husband was good to me, and I him, it was an easy choice. But as years went by, my
husband became abusive. First, he lost my trust, then my respect, and at the end, I stopped making the
choice to love him and I left. I don’t think this means that I never loved him, I did, and I do still care
about him in the sense that I wish no harm on him. I think there are a lot of preconceived notions that
begin at a young age that are cultivated from fairy tales that love IS a fairy tale.

Reply

sandip

sandip

March 1st, 2020 at 1:41 AM

Love is loss of life..

Love is not anything without loss..

Reply

Paige

Paige

March 27th, 2020 at 10:00 PM

There is this boy, he recently broke up with his girlfriend (3 months ago) and he told me he just wanted
time, and I respect that. But one day he took me on a date and he kissed me. So naturally I went home
and asked if we were dating and he said no. I just want to know if that kiss actually meant something to
him or if I was just something for him to do.

Reply

puspa

puspa

April 7th, 2020 at 3:37 AM

Nice I am really clear about love and lust.

Reply

CHRISTIANA

CHRISTIANA

April 10th, 2020 at 6:18 AM

I love this post

Reply

Swarsattie

Swarsattie

April 17th, 2020 at 6:53 AM

“Love and Love in an ideal intimate relationship scenario is a balanced combination?” All in one. Thank
you for sharing this article with the world including me. I learned some deep meaningful insight of what
love is and how to I identify the difference between love and lust. I read all the others comments and I
learned plenty too. Thank you guys so much! I needed this.

Reply

Rambido

Rambido
April 26th, 2020 at 6:41 AM

Love is long suffering (more than patience), it is kind, love does not envy, love does not boast, nor puffed
up with pride, does not act unseemly, has no self interest (an important test!), is not provoked, does not
impute harm. Love DOES rejoice with the truth, bears all, believes all, hopes all, endures all. Love never
fails. Love is a decision we make, not something we fall into or out of.

Reply

Muhindo A. M.

Muhindo A. M.

May 8th, 2020 at 3:08 AM

Aaron

I have learnt that there is true love and false love and in any case true love is better because it heals and
the opposite is vice- versa. And besides good therapy is the best because it covers all other types of love
since it works on the premise of the well-being of humans and other creation in the universe.

Reply

Mobie

Mobie

May 19th, 2020 at 10:25 AM

it’s great.

Reply

Leave a Comment

By commenting you acknowledge acceptance of GoodTherapy.org's Terms and Conditions of Use.

Name:*

Email address:*
Comment:*

* Indicates required field.

previous arrownext arrow

SEE ALSO

Couples and Marriage Counseling

Empathy

Polyamory

Relationships and Marriage

NOTICE TO USERS

GoodTherapy.org is not intended to be a substitute for professional advice, diagnosis, medical

treatment, or therapy. Always seek the advice of your physician or qualified mental health provider with
any questions you may have regarding any mental health symptom or medical condition. Never
disregard professional psychological or medical advice nor delay in seeking professional advice or
treatment because of something you have read on GoodTherapy.org.

ABOUT GOODTHERAPY

About Us

Mission and Vision

Advertise

Press Room

GoodCause

Therapist Membership

Tx Center Membership

Student Membership

Partnership Information
Contact Us

RESOURCES

Find a Therapist

Explore Therapy

Elements of Good Therapy

Modes of Therapy

Dear GoodTherapy

Find a Treatment Center

What Is Therapy?

Types of Therapy

Issues Treated in Therapy

Warning Signs in Therapy

SUBSCRIBE TO NEWSLETTER

Enter email address

FOLLOW GOODTHERAPY

Copyright © 2007 - 2020 GoodTherapy, LLC. All rights reserved.

Home Terms of Service Privacy Policy Sitemap Subscribe to The GoodTherapy Blog.

GoodTherapy uses cookies to personalize content and ads to provide better services for our users and to
analyze our traffic. By continuing to use this site you consent to our cookies.