YOU WERE THE ONLY BIBLE SHE READ

By Patricia Backora

A mini-novel distilled from elements of truth.

All names are as fake as Sunday churchianity.
But the issues portrayed are all tooreal.

Homeward Bound

A sharp pain stabbed Sylvias rib cage. Must be a cold settling in

my chest, she thought.

Sylvia wouldnt go to a doctor. All they ever gave her was bad
news. Once the 60-year-old widowed mom of six had been
misdiagnosed for a stomach complaint and given the wrong
prescription, resulting in splitting headaches which lasted for weeks
on end. Not to mention the runaway pulse and dry mouth which had
made eating and sleeping next to impossible. No, not this time,
thought Sylvia. A brandy tonic. Now that just might kill those nasty
cold germs, and the more, the better.

Sanctimonious Sylvia had a sad little secret: Her best friend wasnt
Jesus, it was some other spirit she kept on the shelf behind the
baked beans, hidden from the prying eyes of her church pals.
Betrayed by the only man shed ever loved, Sylvia never recovered
from the damage done to her self esteem. Sure, the other woman
had been forty pounds lighter and thirty years younger. But Randy
had been a big fat rat to cheat on her, after all the love and
devotion shed dumped on him for so long. Randy had never been
much to look at either. Hed always been a blubbery bullethead.
Before he got killed in a car wreck hed eaten his way to 400 pounds
and had just lost his junior management job at Corrosive
Chemicals. Dallas, a gorgeous Girl Friday whod made doughnut
runs for Randy, had reported him to the Labor Board for sexual
harassment. Company officials had dismissed Dallas case because
her skirts were allegedly too short and no other conclusion could be
reached but that Dallas was trying to get Randy to notice her.

When Randy found out from snickering co-workers that Dallas had
tried to get him fired, he allegedly sneezed in her face to make her
sick, then infected her files with a virus. Dim-witted Randy hadnt
accounted for the fact that all the office buildings computers were
networked, and he couldnt infect one without infecting all the
others. When Randys supervisor tried to access an important
company account, hed only gotten a dirty video, which made his
blood boil. An internal investigation implicated Randy, who couldnt
even come up with a credible alibi to deny it. His mischief had lost a
vital government contract. Sylvia remembered Randy coming home
mad as a wet hen because the head honcho had called Randy every
unflattering name in the English language before firing him without
severance pay. Now that Randy was assuredly roasting in hell for
humiliating her, Sylvia was enjoying his juicy life insurance checks
and the house hed left behind. And, the icing on the cake was that
slut hed shacked up with had died with him in the wreck.

Serves em right for doing me dirty, thought Sylvia. The Lord

always punishes the wicked in the end.

Why had she ever married that monster, Sylvia reflected as she
mixed brandy with Coke. Maybe it was because they shared the
same likes and dislikes, so shed glossed over some of his flaws.
She squeezed some lime juice into her tall drink. Forgive me, dear
God, I need this, she thought. At least my church friends know Im
holy in every important way.

The bracing brew tickled her innards. Sylvia didnt stop with one.
She fixed herself a second and drank it as fast as she could to enjoy
the scalding sensation going down her throat. Then she sashayed
down to the den, flicked on her Fatbuster DVD and started hopping
like crazy on her trampoline. Must get the old heart pumping to
sweat the virus out.
As her feet pounded the trampoline she pretended it was Randy.
She would never ruin her Christian testimony by telling anyone how
happy she was that Randy was doing his own workout down in hell
shoveling coal. The kids, especially, must never know how bitterly
she hated the memory of their dad. Her secrets must remain her
own.

Whee! she giggled, tipsy and lost in her own world. The wilder
the music, the higher and faster she jumped and swerved. So what
if her pulse was pumping hard and fast in her throat? So what if she
was getting nauseated and she was unaware her complexion was
going grey? Gotta push it to the max and make it burn, baby.
Faster, faster, then

The door bell! Must be her oldest daughter coming by to take her
out to dinner today. Sylvia knew she was a sweaty mess but she
had to jump down. Inebriated, she lost her balance, hit her head
on a glass tabletop and was out like a light. As blackness overtook
her, Sylvia heard still more buzzing from the doorbell. Her car was
still parked in the driveway and the video was playing real loud, so
Regina must know her mother was home.

After a lifetime of fretting about her weight, Sylvia felt lighter than
air. She felt herself floating toward the staircase leading up to the
living room, gently wafting upward till she hovered in a dreamland,
but knew not where. Before she knew it Sylvia found herself staring
at what looked like a locked gate made of translucent pearl, against
a backdrop of softly diffused rainbow hues. Powerful light beams
escaped from the top of a wall so high she couldnt see where the
radiance ended and the bluish blackness of space began.

Before she could recover from the awesome spectacle, another

image appeared before her: a gigantic flatscreen video monitor.
The screen was purest white, and blank, just like a sheet of paper
that never had been written on or smudged with erased mistakes.
Out the corner of her eye Sylvia glimpsed a filmy creature with
trailing wings. Fearfully she turned to look at his face. It was not
very friendly, but why? Hadnt he flown her up here?

Trembling, she asked, Whats your name?

I am not permitted to tell you my real name, said the tall,

majestic being of light. You can just call me Angel.

You are here for your post-mortem judgment, said Angel. It is

written in the Word of God that it is appointed unto mortals once to
die, and after that comes their judgment. See this tiny device I
hold in my hand? Its far superior to any technology yet perfected
on earth. It transmits scenes from our vast heavenly data bank
which stores untold trillions of terabytes of data about each
individual who ever inhabited planet earth. Our God has access to
even the deepest ulterior motives behind each action ever
performed by man. Right here and now we shall determine your
worthiness to enter through these sacred portals which admit
pilgrims into the Paradise of God.

With the flick of a button a giant 3-D holographic image appeared

before Sylvia, who gasped at how vast the picture was.

A baby being born. Now its crying. Who is it? she gasped.

You, of course, said Angel. I dont suppose you remember that

far back, do you?

No, Angel, Sylvia said. My earliest memory was when I was

about four. I threw a fit because Mama wouldnt buy me any candy.
My mama took me outside and tanned my britches.

Angels face sobered. Sylvia, for now well leave behind these early
scenes of your life and explore those portions of your lifetime where
you were in possession of a fuller knowledge of right and wrong.
Before I continue I want to repeat a crucial question: Why should
God admit you into heaven?

Sylvia answered as if it had been drilled into her, Because Jesus

paid for my sins and once saved, always saved.

Angel didnt dare dispute the Atonement of Christ for sinners. But
he did ask Sylvia, Do you seriously believe God turns a blind eye to
deliberate, willful sin, Sylvia? Do you think God would rapture a
man to heaven if Christ caught him partying in a whorehouse when
He returned to take His people home?

Sylvia muttered that some sins were worse than others, and she
didnt think a real Christian was capable of anything that bad.

A Haven Of Hypocrisy

Angel wasnt in the mood to argue with her on that point. He fast-
forwarded the vision to somewhere beyond Sylvias eleventh
birthday. She was sitting in church with her family. A preacher
pleaded for sinners to come forward and confess Christ as Savior.
I remember that moment as if it was yesterday, said Sylvia. How
clean I felt when I prayed for Jesus to forgive my sins and come
into my heart. Why, I was so happy I wanted to dance.

Angel sighed. For the first few days after that experience you and
your family rejoiced and could speak of little else. But the church
you attended did little to teach you what to do after you entered the
gates of salvation. Their focus was strictly on getting as many folks
as possible saved to increase church membership. After salvation,
the new convert was simply taught to go out and try to win more
souls to Christ, so they wouldnt go to hell. Not much was taught at
your church about how to get the victory over sin and overcome
temptations which could cause people to fall away from faith in
Christ. Not much was taught about letting the love of Christ shine
through you to bring glory to God. Oddly enough, young people at
your church were recruited to train for the mission field so they
could go to Africa to live among black folks and save their souls
from hell. But these same fine Christians despised the black
people who lived in their own nation and made their lives hell. Dont
you think thats being hypocritical, Sylvia?

Well, thanks to the blacks, white Yankees started the Civil War so
they could set all the slaves free. The Yankees destroyed our way
of life, burnt our plantations

There were ulterior motives involved even in freeing those poor

slaves, Angel said. But the crass hypocrisy of your church is
beyond belief. And their concept of what constitutes holiness was
so shallow that it offended God.

The church people thought that so long as you didnt curse, smoke,
drink or watch immoral movies, you would turn out just fine as a
teenager. You didnt read your Bible much, did you, Sylvia?

Well, I couldnt make heads nor tails of it, Angel. I left that part up
to the preacher. Besides, we paid Brother Beason real good to study
the Bible so he could share its messages with us.

Your preacher preached on what was profitable to him, Angel said

with a look of disgust. Generally Brother Beason preached what
the people wanted to hear instead of what they needed to hear. He
was what the Bible refers to as a hireling who doesnt really care
about the sheep, just the wages he receives. Getting souls saved
and on fire for Jesus resulted in more tithe-payers out in the pews.
So there was something in it for him, not just for the Lord.

Nobody I knew ever saw it that way, Sylvia mumbled.

He may have been a wicked man, Sylvia, but he had the guile of a
snake. Once that predatory preacher lured the sheep into his pews,
he had to watch what he said so he wouldnt drive his own cash
cows away. Brother Beason, like most preachers in your area, spent
the majority of his time preaching on false traditions like tithing on
paychecks, a doctrine found nowhere in Scripture. Or, he would
preach gimmicky sermons on light, inoffensive topics, using lots of
anecdotes to keep the people entertained. Whenever sin was
mentioned, it was airbrushed away as a human fault. Only at
revival time would he get serious about winning souls to Christ.

As you well remember, Sylvia, church revivals were popular in the

deep South of the 60s. Regularly scheduled revival meetings were
pre-orchestrated and would be carried out whether God was present
or not. They were cleverly staged community social events which
would draw crowds and attract publicity. I admit, even if the
preachers motives werent always the purest, a few souls might be
won just from responding to the Good News that Christ died for
sinners. But once those souls were won, they were bound up in a
prison of religious tradition by the pastor and left unfed.

Sylvia drew a sigh of relief. So if Ive committed any sins I cant be

held liable because its the pastors fault. Right?

The angel frowned. Willful ignorance is no excuse. Were you able

to read, Sylvia?

Sure, Angel, most everybody could read, except for the dumbest
kids."

Sylvia, as I recall, every day you went to junior high school, each
morning a child took turns reading a scripture passage of his or her
choice. Here you are reading yours. Another vision unfolded.

Thats me when I was about twelve, Sylvia gasped. Im standing

in Mrs. Harleys home room class. Im opening the Bible at random.
Wait, Ive found something, but what is it?

Listen to young Sylvia read, Angel said. This is extremely

important now.

Mark 12: 28 And one of the scribes came, and having heard them
reasoning together, and perceiving that he had answered them well,
asked him, Which is the first commandment of all?
29 And Jesus answered him, The first of all the commandments is,
Hear, O Israel; The Lord our God is one Lord:
30 And thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with
all thy soul, and with all thy mind, and with all thy strength: this is
the first commandment.
31 And the second is like, namely this, Thou shalt love thy
neighbour as thyself. There is none other commandment greater
than these.

Now, Sylvia, earlier you told me you couldnt make heads nor tails
of the Bible. Whats so difficult about the passage you just read?
What was it you couldnt understand about it?

Oh, I understood everything about it, Angel. Love thy neighbor

was preached at my church on a regular basis.

The angel raised his eyebrows. Really and truly?

A Heart Of Hate

The video of Sylvias life resumed. People were milling about in the
sanctuary of Holy Hill Church, discussing the wonderful sermon
theyd just heard. Young Sylvia was chatting with some pals from
Sunday School.

Ruby, her mom, was yakking with Sister Melanie, the elderly
organist. Ruby boasted that by now ALL her kids had been saved
and were on their way to heaven.

You just wait till the dust settles and those kids come back down to
earth, Sister Melanie sniffed. If somethings good it aint gonna
last too long. Even if your children did pray the sinners prayer and
give their lives to God, you cant rest easy. Two or three years down
the line, youll know whether they really meant it or not. My son
Eddie, he told me he got saved when he was eleven. But hes been
in the state penitentiary now for the past seven years.

Ruby looked miffed. Ill have you know, Sister Melanie, my

children are very decent and theyve been brought up to respect
their elders and treat their neighbor just like theyd want to be
treated. Now, Im very sorry to hear about your Eddie. But dont go
saying my children will follow in his footsteps.

With a strange faraway look Sister Melanie said, Time will tell.

A giggling girl jabbed Sylvia playfully. Is he for real, Sylvia? I

mean, do we have to love everybody? Even colored folks?
He just said we had to love our neighbor, Debbie. We dont have
colored people in our neighborhoods, or at least I dont. Do you?

A third girl added sweetly, Now we really do love Aunt Bessie, our
maid, but if she moved next door to us Id just die!

I sure am glad Jesus was white, Sylvia said. See? Theres a

picture of him on the wall. Sylvia pointed at a white-robed Jesus
sitting on a rock, holding a shepherds crook and dreamily watching
over a few snow white, fluffy sheep in an idyllic green pasture. This
particular Jesus had flowing golden hair. He was pale as buttermilk.
That fragile figure didnt look rugged enough to work outdoors.

Do you seriously think Jesus looks like that, Sylvia? Angel asked.

Sure, doesnt everyone? Will I get to see him?

In due time, Sylvia, but it wont be much fun when you do.

Why shouldnt I look forward to seeing Jesus?

Because you died cherishing a lot of old sins you never repented of.
The REAL Savior said, Blessed are the pure in heart, for they shall
see God. Are you pure in heart or did you harbor hatred toward
your neighbors who wanted to live in peace?

Sylvia blinked. Hatred? Me? Why Id never

But you did, Sylvia. Not just a one-off incident, but you and your
snobby friends waged a protracted campaign of abuse against one
poor lonely girl in particular, Trina Conway.

Sylvia snorted. Now I see what your agenda is, Angel. Trina put
you up to this. Youve got an ax to grind with me so you yanked me
up here to hang a guilt trip on me. After all these years God
couldnt just let bygones be bygones. Whats wrong? Didnt I pay
enough tithes and offerings to my church? I served on every single
committee of every single church I ever went to. The way I see it, I
paid through the nose for my ticket to heaven. Thats gratitude for
you.

But Sylvia, chided the angel, didnt you just tell me you trusted in
the atonement of Christ to get you through these Pearly Gates?

Yeah, I did say that. But why would God drag up that * * * * after
so many years that I served him?
Angel gave her a hard stare. Mind your wicked tongue, Sylvia!
What youre about to experience runs far deeper than any external
images you could view on a monitor. Now you shall KNOW what
killed your early faith in Christ and made a mockery of your
religion.

In her vision Sylvia found herself dressed in her glee club uniform,
the tacky red jumper and white blouse that made her look like
Santa Claus on estrogen. She recalled how after she graduated
junior high, shed donated the dress to the Salvation Army, feeling a
bit guilty because her mother had to make the ugly thing. But now
she was proudly standing on a riser, singing with other glee club
members whod ridden the bus 200 miles on this field trip to sing
for the chief bigwigs at the state university.

Notice anybody whos not in the group, Sylvia? Angel asked.

That stupid Trina Conway, she snickered. There she is at a little

table with another girl keeping her company so she wont feel so
bad. Rumor has it the teacher was ordered by school officials to
keep Trina out of the concertto avoid embarrassing our school.

Was she that bad of a singer, Sylvia? Angel asked. Tell the truth
now.

Grudgingly Sylvia admitted Trina was no worse than anybody else.

Trina practiced hard, the angel said. She had a beautiful voice
too. It was just prejudice against her because others made this poor
lonely girl a conspicuous target of abuse. Throughout her school
year Trina was unjustly blamed and censured for being the peer
groups designated victim. Thats just as sinful as punishing a
woman for being a rape victim, saying it must be her fault for
attracting the attack. When you punish the victim for being a
victim, you reopen raw wounds before they get the chance to heal.

But all the other kids cant be wrong while that one girl was right,
Sylvia said.

God doesnt run a democracy, Sylvia. Matters of right and wrong

arent decided in His court through majority opinion. Noah took
only seven other people with him on the Ark. The rest of the world
laughed at him and his God, but God didnt say Noah was wrong
because he was outvoted and outnumbered. God sent the flood to
destroy them all even though sinners were in the majority. Every
authority figure who unjustly blamed Trina for being a victim is an
abomination to God. Proverbs 17:15 says that whoever acquits the
wicked, and condemns the innocent is an abomination to the LORD.
That would include every teacher who turned a blind eye to what
was done to Trina, and every teacher who heaped shame and
humiliation on her for being a victim. These wicked people were
enablers who allowed this outrage to go on, just to avoid having to
confront the kids and their parents. They reasoned that one cant
be right while all the rest are wrong. But God doesnt see it that
way. You cant dismiss a raped womans complaint on the basis that
a thousand satisfied men cant be wrong.

The scene shifted to the cafeteria where the glee club went for
supper that evening. Before Trina sat down at her lonely little table,
Sylvia felt herself sucked into Trinas skin. Now Sylvia was viewing
the world through Trinas eyes.

The only girl sitting alone, the angel said with disgust. What
crime did Trina commit to deserve this harsh treatment? There, you
see two girls Trina knew in sixth grade. Girls who had never been
mean to her then. But now that they were in seventh grade, they
had turned into vicious big time operators.

Fish good, Trina? the blond girl sneered, looking at her friend for
approval.

Sylvia felt her cheeks burn. Her throat tightened. Tension knotted
up her gut. She felt like a lone fish in a bowl being eyed hungrily
by a gang of cats. A primal, choking fear gripped her, sending her
adrenalin rushing. She felt the weight of a hard stare coming at her
from across the little roomfrom herself!

Sylvia glared with precalculated malice and whispered ugly things

loud enough for Trina to hear. The blond girl said to her friend,
Theres your girl friend. To which the second girl replied, Shes
not my girl friend!

A mixture of profound sadness and bitter hatred boiled up in Trinas

heart, which she dare not show. She hid her face and choked down
her meal in silence, silently damning herself for not playing sick and
staying home that day.

You and those other evil vipers turned Trinas fun day out into a
bad day, said Angel. Those other two girls will receive the full
reward of their iniquity within a few short years. Their religion, like
yours, is only a sham which they go through to keep up a
respectable image in their respectable Southern community.
Trina began to be bullied the same way other children began to be
bullied, by making an unfavorable first impression through no fault
of their own, said Angel. The first day of class the teacher singled
Trina out and began to ask her stupid personal questions she didnt
have ready answers for. Trina felt self-conscious and a panic attack
swept over her, causing tears to seep out her eyes against her will.
She could barely breathe. The whole class laughed. The teacher
threatened to tell on Trina to her father, which she did, and it only
made matters worse. That first day of abuse was like a tiny rock
slipping over the edge of a snowy slope. It could not be stopped.
Momentum built up, and Trinas disgrace, so undeserved, increased
in a snowballing cycle of bullying, resentment, anger, and escalation
of the bullying.

Sinful human beings are full of malice, always looking for at least
one victim to crucify for their own pleasure, Sylvia, as you well
know. Once someone makes one tiny social gaffe or shows the
slightest bit of weakness, that individual is forever designated as
the scapegoat against whom all sorts of abuse is aimed. Children
bully just because they can. Ecclesiastes 8:11 comments on how
sinners are very eager to do evil just because there is no immediate
danger of being punished for sin.

Sinners show no grace or mercy toward those they view as

different. Even if they eventually tire of their cruelty and offer to
build bridges of reconciliation with the victim, the damage has
already been done to that persons soul. The victim has been
rendered unable to trust that the persecutors intentions are good.
Even if the teacher suggests that the victim try to build bridges of
understanding with the abusers, the hurt cuts so deeply into the
victims soul that he fears the bridge will have be made of rotting
planks which will collapse from attempting to cross it, which would
provide additional amusement for the victims tormentors.

A Painful Point Of View

Sylvia found herself in a classroom once again, laughing as her pal

Randy called Trina a spastic. But this time Sylvia was hearing the
insults through Trinas ears. She felt the sharp pain in Trinas
instep, caused by blobby Randy stomping on her foot. It wasnt
much fun for Sylvia to stand in someone elses shoes and see, hear
and feel the world from their perspective. Sylvia heard Trina
making a complaint to Mrs. Harley about kids giving her a hard
time. Resentment flooded through her as the teacher said, Im
tired of this, Trina, and Im not going to protect you anymore.
Somebody elses bitterness over being blamed for her own problem
hit Sylvia in the gut. She wished she could exit the other girls
nervous system and once again keep her distance from somebody
elses pain.

There I go down the hall, laughing with my friends, Sylvia

muttered. But Im trapped in Trinas skin. There we are, as Trina
sits all by herself in the library, guarded by mean old Mrs. Spindle,
who threatens to paddle her if she makes one false move. Not that
she didnt deserve it after ratting on us to the teachers.

Day after day she sat there, staring into space, trying to shut the
nasty world out, feeling numb and slowly dying inside, Angel said.
Trinas grades were already awful because she couldnt
concentrate, but now she was afraid her parents would find out that
shed been banned from most of her classes, as if she were a
violent criminal. Trina figures she just has to take life one day at a
time and try not to think about the future. What a pity you didnt
think about your own future, Sylvia.

An after-school scene showed Trina hurrying down the sidewalk,

only to be confronted by Randy and Sylvia. Someone elses mind-
numbing sadness and anger swept through Sylvia as she watched
herself being mean to a helpless, friendless girl. Randy and Sylvia
had the ugliest grins on their faces. They grabbed Trinas books and
played catch with them before throwing them into the street. Trina
could only scream her hate and resentment helplessly.

So you call yourself a Christian, Angel seethed. Was that the

behavior of a true believer in Christ?

The scene shifted to Sunday School where Mrs. Minton taught the
Intermediate Girls Class.

The bespectacled lady was teaching from Psalms 132. Sylvia stared
at her quarterly, barely there and daydreaming about her upcoming
horseback riding competition.

The final verse of Psalms 132 read: His enemies will I clothe with
shame: but upon himself shall his crown flourish.

In that verse God promises to highly exalt David and make him a
successful king, Mrs. Minton said. But all his enemies who tried to
kill him will be covered in shame and humiliation. Many times it
looks like the bad guy is winning, but when God comes on the scene
He turns the tables on the wicked and makes them suffer for all the
evil theyve done. It may seem that the devils crowd is winning and
has all the advantages, but those who trust in the Lord always come
out on top.
Sylvia barely looked up from her lap. She was squirming and
anxious to get out of that Sunday School class.

You didnt take that lesson home and apply it to your life, did you,
Sylvia? Angel asked reproachfully.

Well, Trina never did come out on top, so that verse cant be true,
Sylvia retorted. That communist

You didnt even know what a communist was back then, Sylvia,
Angel said. That was just a handy catchall insult to make others
feel like social outcasts. And youre the reason Trina never made
her peace with God. YOU!

Satans Cheering Squad

The vision shifted to a sunny afternoon in November, 1963. Sylvia

and her multitude of friends werent bothering Trina today as they
usually did when school turned out. Theyd found someone else to
pick on, someone they didnt even know personally but hated with
all their rotten hearts. Once again Sylvia felt her consciousness
return to her own body as she joined in a happy crowd spilling down
the front steps of the school, cheering that JFK had just been shot
dead in Dallas.

Serves him right, some said, the way he helped those n*****s
instead of acting like a decent white man.

God always punishes communists, Sylvia snickered.

You and all the rest of those wicked kids went home to equally
bigoted parents who gave God thanks for someone elses death.
Maybe the man didnt go to your church, but his family wept over
him when this outrage happened. How would you have felt if your
daddy had been gunned down in Dallas, Sylvia? How would you
have felt if you knew others were laughing and cheering about it?

Mad, I guess, Sylvia mumbled.

Where in Scripture does Jesus ever teach Christians to act like you
did that evil day? Angel asked.

Well, white people are better, Sylvia shrugged. At least people

used to think so before liberal Yankee politicians changed the South
into a multicultural society and turned the Confederate flag into a
symbol of evil.
The angel looked irritated. Did Jesus die to save the honor of a
flag? Does God owe you thanks for the color of your skin? Does
that earn you points with Him or whitewash your ugly sins? Our
Creator is not blind. Nor is He stupid.

You were a coward, Sylvia. Had Trina been able to defend herself,
you never would have done this to her. You gave her not a
moments rest as long as she went to that damnable school. She
couldnt even walk home in peace.

Sylvia felt herself sucked into Trinas consciousness again. She had
just left school and was passing the parking lot when she heard a
voice coming from a pickup truck: There she is! Sylvia saw
herself pointing at Trina, felt Trinas helpless rage and frustration.

Hi! the grinning driver called sheepishly, feigning friendliness.

You made Trina feel like a zoo animal. You just never got enough
of torturing that poor girl. This is the damage you did to Trina as
you tore her down for so many months:

Although Trina was naturally bright, she had trouble learning

because she had to concentrate on surviving, not thriving, in that
hostile prison called school. Daily she suffered depression,
thoughts of suicide and deep resentment that she couldnt flee that
torture chamber. Teachers sided with you bullies because it was the
easy thing to do, not the righteous thing to do. They blamed her
when she complained about the protracted emotional abuse. Just
so they wouldnt have to address the bullying problem and could
save class time, they isolated her in the library where she sat alone
most of the day. She sat all alone in that chair for long stretches of
time, daydreaming of the day she could escape school and be free.
She felt numb and detached from reality, as if her soul faculties
were shutting down. Thats the beginning of death, Sylvia!
DAILY you and your buddies injected death into Trinas soul like a
slow drip of rat poison.

One day Trinas home room class talked about her as if she wasnt
even present. By now Trina had been so badly traumatized by the
long campaign of hatred against her, she couldnt love or trust
anybody anymore, not even her closest relatives. Her public
humiliation, the sabotage of her education and isolation in the
library had broken her spirit to the point where she couldnt have
cared even if theyd laid flowers at her feet. You bullies had bound
Trina with a spirit of shame and worthlessness. Thanks to the
satanic influence of unholy churchgoers, Trina was unable to forgive
bullies who just might turn on her again once the teacher wasnt
looking. She was angry because thanks to you bullies, she was
bound to fail that year while the rest of you passed. Any little
overture of friendliness was too little too late, and suspected of
being a trick to play perverse games with her battered emotions.
Satan had done his dirty work thoroughly, through so-called
churchgoers who read out of the Holy Bible every single morning.
After seven long months of hatred and humiliation, mistrust and
cynicism were now deeply embedded in Trinas character and the
innocence of childhood had been destroyed.

Out For Blood

Sylvia felt the full force of Trinas last memory on earth. She felt
Trinas terror as she ran a gauntlet of laughing, jeering kids who
pointed and harassed her as she fled down the front steps of the
school. Trina felt like everyone on earth was against her and life
wasnt worth living. Sylvia felt the black blanket of despair choking
the life out of her soul.

Trina, blinded by tears, ran as hard as she could to get away from
the howling mob, those same nasty, depraved kids who had cheered
when President Kennedy was murdered in Dallas.

Let me out! Sylvia begged the angel, clutching at her throat. I

cant stand this feeling, Im smothering to death! Im scared!
Please let me out of her!

No, not yet, Angel said. Not till were finished with this part of
your life review.

Trina ran wildly, cursing the churchgoing bullies who had hurt her
and were still pursuing her, trying to grab her book satchel, clawing
at her, shoving her. They cheered when Trina ran blindly in front of
a blue pickup truck and died instantly.

NO! Sylvia screamed, as she felt Trinas death terror.

Angel whirled round. Fire blazed in his eyes. God holds YOU and
your filthy friends guilty of first-degree murder for the death of
someone he had plans to save! God had a purpose for that girls
life, but you decided for her that her life wasnt worth living.

But I always said my prayers before bedtime and asked God to

forgive me if Id done anything wrong, Sylvia sniveled. I was such
a faithful churchgoer too.
That doesnt count with God, said the angel. Before we wrap up
these proceedings lets examine your weak excuse anyway.

Sylvia saw herself, about age forty, lingering in the foyer, chatting
with the pastors wife after a morning service. A pleasant woman
with a kind voice, she asked Sylvia what she thought of the sermon.

Beautiful, absolutely beautiful, Sylvia said with a sunny smile.

Oh, yes, I loved that part about God casting away our sins as far
as the east is from the west and remembering them no more.

And I just know youve truly repented of all your sins and are at
peace with God, the other woman said.

I sure have. Ive repented from the bottom of my heart and I feel
clean as a whistle inside, Sylvia replied. You and the pastor are
such a blessing to this church, Sister Johnson.

Sylvia cringed when the next images appeared. She saw herself
lounging out in the back yard with Randy and a few church friends
whod come over for a cookout. They were stretched out on lawn
chairs, sipping iced tea. The hot sun glistened on their red, sweaty
hides. Randy swatted flies away from the charcoal grill where
burgers and steaks sizzled.

Randy grinned. He was enjoying the conversation. Sylvia was

laughing and bragging about all the dirty things she and Randy once
did to Trina, allegedly the dumbest, ugliest girl theyd ever known.
Randy said he wished Trina hadnt got bumped off before the end of
that school year, he was just getting warmed up.

You going to that church spaghetti supper, Sylvia? Debbie lazily

yawned when they got tired of yakking about Trina. Well be
holding a raffle to raise money for foreign missions. The winner
gets an abstract painting of Jesus, done by Brother Eds wife. You
know how good she is.

Count me in, said Sylvia. I love collecting other peoples art. Tell
me, is it true the pastors wife was seen boogeying with the deacon
down at the Brave Bull? The shameless hussy. Our pastor deserves
better than her.

You spent the rest of that afternoon back-stabbing the pastors

wife, Angel said. By the time that story made the rounds of your
personal prayer chain, you had the pastors wife shacked up with
the deacon at the Holiday Inn. Lets see what happens next.
Sylvia arrived at the evening service, dragging Randy along, who
grumbled about the ball game he was missing on TV. She faked a
cheesy smile and approached the pastors wife, who was greeting
newcomers.

Sister Johnson, Sylvia gushed, so nice to see you again this

evening. I brought you a big piece of my fresh-baked apple cake.
She handed her the container.

Thank you, Sylvia, Sister Johnson said. Too bad Im on a diet,

but perhaps Ill share it with my grandchildren.

With a catty stare Sylvia said, I really do admire you, Sister

Johnson. A woman must keep her figurefor her husband, that is.
She laughed nervously. Men do appreciate the effort you make.

Fat Randy approached from behind. Never a tactful individual, he

blurted out, Deacon Davis likes older women with plenty of meat in
all the right places, or at least thats what I heard. And he likes to
take em out to the Brave Bull Saloon.

The color drained from Sister Johnsons face. So thats what you
think! It just so happens I joined Deacon Davis and his wife at the
Bolero Bravo Mexican Restaurant last week for lunch, to discuss
plans for renovating the church sanctuary. One of your spies must
have spotted us while Sister Davis was in the powder room. Shame
on you both, and no, Sylvia, I will not accept your peace offering.
No wonder people have been staring at me so funny all day. Just
wait till I tell my husband. She started to cry.

Whats the matter, Sister Johnson? Sylvia guffawed nervously.

Cant you take a joke, or dont you have a tough enough hide? You
flea-brain fool! she shoved Randy.

Randy shoved Sylvia back. She slammed against a pew. When he

called her a clumsy klutz, she stomped out the front door crying.

You could dish it out but it appears you couldnt take it, Angel
said. I rest my case. You lose, Sylvia.

Chill, dude! Sylvia cried. Ive still got that ace up my sleeve:
Once saved, always saved. No matter how I acted or what I did,
Jesus died to pay for all my so-called sins, so you cant hold me
liable for any! Now get of my way! Im going through those Pearly
Gates come hell or high water, and you aint gonna stop me!
 Sylvias Sins Judged By The Bible

With the lightest touch Angel pulled Sylvia away from the gates.
NO! We dont want you here, and Im going to show you why,
right out of Gods own Book.

Angle clicked some buttons on his remote, then pointed to his first
scripture reference, displayed on his widescreen monitor:

Psalms 5:5: The foolish shall not stand in thy sight: thou hatest all
workers of iniquity.

Sylvia, this verse out of Psalms clearly says that God hates ALL
workers of wickedness, said Angel.

But thats out of the Old Testament, Sylvia argued.

Well then, lets substantiate it with words spoken by the Savior.

Matt.7:21: Not every one that saith unto me, Lord, Lord, shall enter
into the kingdom of heaven; but he that doeth the will of my Father
which is in heaven.
22 Many will say to me in that day, Lord, Lord, have we not
prophesied in thy name? and in thy name have cast out devils? and
in thy name done many wonderful works?
23 And then will I profess unto them, I never knew you: depart
from me, ye that work iniquity.

Sylvia cringed in terror. Angel pointed at the scriptural scroll of

condemnation shining against the backdrop of the heavenlies.

Sylvia, many who once named the Name of Christ with malice and
evil in their hearts will come to Christ in the Day of Judgment,
begging Him to admit them to the Paradise of God based on former
works performed in His Name. But works you do are tainted with
sin unless they are done through His enablement and in the spirit of
His love. Your own works could not save you, nor could your so-
called good works cancel out the horrible sins you deliberately
committed when you sided with satan and his crowd at school.

Sylvia raised her chin defiantly. You need to show me more before
Ill even begin to think theres no such thing as once saved, always
saved, she said, as calmly as she could.

Okay, Ill show you a bunch more, Sylvia, but you sure wont like
it.
Luke 3:9: And now also the axe is laid unto the root of the trees:
every tree therefore which bringeth not forth good fruit is hewn
down, and cast into the fire.
10 And the people asked him, saying, What shall we do then?
11 He answereth and saith unto them, He that hath two coats, let
him impart to him that hath none; and he that hath meat, let him
do likewise.
12 Then came also publicans to be baptized, and said unto him,
Master, what shall we do?
13 And he said unto them, Exact no more than that which is
appointed you.
14 And the soldiers likewise demanded of him, saying, And what
shall we do? And he said unto them, Do violence to no man, neither
accuse any falsely; and be content with your wages.

This passage clearly shows what good fruit is, Angel said, and it
warns of the terrible penalty for failure to bear that good fruit.
Good fruit is Gods love in action. Be kind and fair in your dealings
with others and share with the needy. And: DO VIOLENCE TO NO
MAN. Every day you beat up on Trinas soul. All you ever shared
with Trina was hatred, and your fruit was deadly poison to her.
Heres more on what constitutes good fruit or bad fruit in a
Christians life:

Gal.5:22: Now the works of the flesh are manifest, which are these;
Adultery, fornication, uncleanness, lasciviousness,
20 Idolatry, witchcraft, hatred, variance, emulations, wrath, strife,
seditions, heresies,
21 Envyings, murders, drunkenness, revellings, and such like: of
the which I tell you before, as I have also told you in time past, that
they which do such things shall not inherit the kingdom of God.
22 But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering,
gentleness, goodness, faith,
23 Meekness, temperance: against such there is no law.
24 And they that are Christ's have crucified the flesh with the
affections and lusts.

Instead of exercising love, gentleness and goodness toward Trina

you committed hatred and murder against her. Instead of crucifying
the old flesh nature, you emotionally crucified Trina. In using fear
tactics against her daily, you and your evil friends conspired to
control her moods and destroy her health and peace. That is a type
of witchcraft, a collusion with satan himself in his ministry of steal,
kill and destroy, mentioned by Jesus Himself in John 10:10. The
Lord Jesus Christ came to give abundant life to all His creatures who
would trust in Him. For a short season you rejoiced in your Savior.
But you denied Trina that same opportunity to receive abundant life
from the Savior. Thats fine gratitude to Him for saving your
reprobate soul! The angel scowled. Now what else did Jesus say
about evildoers? This is a very long passage, so Ill slowly scroll
through it and read it out loud so youll have time to digest the full
impact of it:

John 8:31: Then said Jesus to those Jews which believed on him, If
ye continue in my word, then are ye my disciples indeed;
32 And ye shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free.
33 They answered him, We be Abraham's seed, and were never in
bondage to any man: how sayest thou, Ye shall be made free?
34 Jesus answered them, Verily, verily, I say unto you, Whosoever
committeth sin is the servant of sin.
35 And the servant abideth not in the house for ever: but the Son
abideth ever.
36 If the Son therefore shall make you free, ye shall be free indeed.

37 I know that ye are Abraham's seed; but ye seek to kill me,

because my word hath no place in you.

38 I speak that which I have seen with my Father: and ye do that

which ye have seen with your father.
39 They answered and said unto him, Abraham is our father. Jesus
saith unto them, If ye were Abraham's children, ye would do the
works of Abraham.
40 But now ye seek to kill me, a man that hath told you the truth,
which I have heard of God: this did not Abraham.
41 Ye do the deeds of your father. Then said they to him, We be not
born of fornication; we have one Father, even God.
42 Jesus said unto them, If God were your Father, ye would love
me: for I proceeded forth and came from God; neither came I of
myself, but he sent me.
43 Why do ye not understand my speech? even because ye cannot
hear my word.
44 Ye are of your father the devil, and the lusts of your father ye
will do. He was a murderer from the beginning, and abode not in
the truth, because there is no truth in him. When he speaketh a lie,
he speaketh of his own: for he is a liar, and the father of it.

Now, Sylvia, youll remember this passage began by stating that

Jesus was addressing those Jews that believed on Him. Thats
important because this passage strongly indicates a condition of
double-mindedness in these listeners. When the discourse began,
they were described as believing on Him, which indicates they were
not hostile toward Christ, yet. But the minute Jesus told them they
had to continue in His Word in order to continue being His disciples,
and the minute He told them they needed to be set free from
personal bondages to sin, they started throwing up defenses and
justifying themselves on the basis of their ancestry. Just like youve
always justified yourself before God on the basis of being white, and
a respectable churchgoer who was loyal to fine Southern traditions
inherited from your forebears.

Those wicked people said, Abraham was our ancestor, so that

makes us better than others. But Jesus told these people that if
they really were the children of Abraham, they would do the works
of Abraham. Now you claim to be a child of God entitled to enter
these gates, on the basis of a one-time encounter with Christ, Who
you repudiated in your daily life once you came under intense peer
pressure to conform to sin. Jesus said in this passage that if you
commit sin youre the slave of sin, not His slave. The people
stopped listening to Christ and developed a murderous hatred of
Him because His Word had no place in their hearts. You hated Trina
because you needed a handy toilet to deposit your spiritual filth in.
An eternity in hell, Gods garbage dump for sinners, awaits you.

The Rotten Fruit Of Sin

Sylvia gnashed her teeth in rage. How dare you! A real angel
would never say anything that ugly!

Oh, yeah? Angel retorted. Lets read this particular passage

about what God says about how He will treat sinners when He
comes to punish the earth for its sin:

Jer.25:31: noise shall come even to the ends of the earth; for the
LORD hath a controversy with the nations, he will plead with all
flesh; he will give them that are wicked to the sword, saith the
LORD.
32 Thus saith the LORD of hosts, Behold, evil shall go forth from
nation to nation, and a great whirlwind shall be raised up from the
coasts of the earth.
33 And the slain of the LORD shall be at that day from one end of
the earth even unto the other end of the earth: they shall not be
lamented, neither gathered, nor buried; they shall be dung upon
the ground.

Look at verse 33 again, Sylvia. Do you know what dung

means?

Sure I do, its doo doo.

What would your teacher have done if youd read that particular
verse?

Sent me to the principals office, I guess.

But it was God Himself Who flat-out said that He is going to turn
vile unrepentant sinners into a dung heap.

Now back to the other passage in John chapter 8. Angel flashed it

back onto the monitor. The rebellious Jews in the crowd got real
mean and said, Well, at least we werent born of fornication. Some
of them remembered that there had been lots of gossip about why
Joseph hurried up and quietly married Mary before the end of their
betrothal period. In effect, they were accusing Christ of being a
bastard, someone without a legitimate father. Jesus had an
excellent answer for them. He told them their own father was satan
because they did the works of satan. Like father, like son. You,
Sylvia, a former convert to Christ, turned your back on Him and did
the will of the devil, so youre his child too.

Thats a lie! Sylvia yelled.

Its the truth! Angel scolded. Do you think the Heavenly Father
inspired those sins you committed against Trina?

She glared at him. Oh, I guess not!

Well, that hatred and abuse didnt just appear out of nowhere.
Every evil act starts with a thought that was authored by satans
kingdom of darkness. The devil filled your heart with malice toward
Trina. Instead of going to the Savior and asking Him to deliver you
from the power of that temptation to abuse Trina, you gave in to it
over and over and over again, and laughed about it all your life
before you came here today.

Well, Sylvia huffed, at least give me credit if I didnt do anything

worse than laugh at some girl.

Sylvia, the worst sin you committed wasnt against Trina. It was
committed against the Savior Himself. Read this passage:

Heb.6:4: For it is impossible for those who were once enlightened,

and have tasted of the heavenly gift, and were made partakers of
the Holy Ghost,
5 And have tasted the good word of God, and the powers of the
world to come,
6 If they shall fall away, to renew them again unto repentance;
seeing they crucify to themselves the Son of God afresh, and put
him to an open shame.
7 For the earth which drinketh in the rain that cometh oft upon it,
and bringeth forth herbs meet for them by whom it is dressed,
receiveth blessing from God:
8 But that which beareth thorns and briers is rejected, and is nigh
unto cursing; whose end is to be burned.

You did not bear good fruit unto your Savior, Sylvia, Angel said
ruefully. Instead you bore rotten fruit which brought reproach to
His Name. You painted yourself as Christs representative as you
bragged about your churchgoing. You put the Lord Jesus to shame.
You brought forth thorns and briars which brought pain and misery
to other peoples lives. Thorns and briars have no place in this
heavenly kingdom. The only use for thorns is to be burned.

NO! Sylvia screamed. Hey, wait! I did produce good fruit in my

life! What about my six fine kids?

Angel wrinkled his nose. I really dont want to delve into their
personal histories right now. Unless they repent, theyll have to
endure their own judgment soon enough. It was nauseating
enough to take a peek into your life, Sylvia. But why dont we
examine their present activities?

The vision shifted to present-day earth. Sylvias front door,

formerly locked, was a mess of splinters and broken door jambs. It
had been broken down by the fire department after Sylvias
daughter Regina called them because she knew her moms history
of heart problems.

Did theyfind me? Sylvia choked.

Your body got carted off to the morgue as soon as it was

discovered and you were confirmed dead, Angel said, coolly.

At least Regina showed a little concern by calling the fire

department, Sylvia said. Such a darling daughter, and ever since
she found out I had heart trouble shes treated me like a queen. The
best in the bunch. If only Id made out a will, I would have left her
a sizable chunk of what I had left. Oh, well

You say your children were the good fruit of your life, Sylvia,
Regina especially. So now lets find out how good they really are.

Horrible And Heartless

Sylvia gasped in shock as she watched Regina, Stroup, Garvin,
Stacy and Jeff roaming through her house, ransacking it, probably
looking for loose change. They rifled through drawers, flipped over
couch cushions, rummaged through cupboards and boxes, argued
with each other over what heirlooms dear sweet Mama had left
behind. Lonnie, a shy 35-year old bachelor, sat downstairs by
himself in the living room, softly sobbing and looking through a
picture album. He examined one photo of the family at Dollywood,
grinning and lining up to get on the scary rides he loved.

Regina was a tall, broad shouldered redhead. She had the same
hard face and piercing eyes as her mother. She jerked open her
mothers closet and picked through dresses, skirts and tops. Any
items she disliked or thought she couldnt sell were contemptuously
flung on the floor. Anything particularly nice was tossed onto the
bed for later sorting. Stacy helped her dig through their mothers
shoes and accessories.

Hey, I found something! petite Stacy called. Cmere,

everybody!

If its a wad of cash, give us our share, you pig! bearded Jeff
called, waving a beer and waddling into the cluttered master
bedroom from the upstairs hallway.

Shut up, you airhead! Stacy shrieked. She threw a tennis shoe
his way. She held a notebook up to light seeping in through the
window blinds and messed up her mothers perfect grammar as she
read the cover: Dont NOBODY open this thing, never! Well, Im a-
gonna read this here thing right here and now and see what that old
bitch had to say. Sorry, Mama, but youre dead and gone and it
cant bother you no more nohow.

Everybody roared when big, beefy Stroup held up Sylvias

supersized bra against his chest and did a silly dance.

Stacy coughed as she flipped through her mamas scribbled diary.

My word, Jeff, you never read such filth in your life. So this is what
Mama thought of Daddy. Poor sweet Daddy, howd he ever stand
that woman! Wonder what the last page says.

How in hell have I ever lived with that stupid tub of lard for so
long? Im ashamed to sit in the same pew with him at church.
After I got out of the shower he stomped on my foot and said I
looked like an old sack of potatoes without my clothes on. Then
theres that trashy woman hes beencough! Come read it yourself,
everybody, or Ill have to wash my mouth out with soap. All I can
say bout that is, if Daddy really done it, Mama musta drove him to
it.

The other four treasure hunters were speechless as they craned

their necks to read the notebook. If she hated Daddy, she sure
did a good job hiding it, Stacy commented.

About the onliest time I ever seen her kiss Daddy was when he got
her that sauna bed she wanted, Stroup shrugged.

Not that it helped her wrinkles any, Garvin sneered.

No wonder Daddy had a heart attack, Regina guffawed. Seein

that woman without makeup every morning scared him to death.

Heres something else I found in a book satchel! Jeff yelped.

Man, you wont believe this! Leering, he showed the canvas to
the whole gang.

Well, Ill be! Regina gasped. She drew our daddy with a hog
head! What a mean thing to do! Well, we wont get no money for
that one, just as well throw it in the trash, I guess.

Give it here, smart ass Stroup grinned. I wanna keep it to

remember the old buzzard by.

Could hang out Mamas picture on the porch at Halloween to scare

all the kids off! Jeff cackled.

Just then Lonnie walked into the bedroom. Whatd I hear you say
about our mama, Jeff?

Mind your own damn business, Jeff snarled. This dont concern
you, and you aint gettin a penny of Mamas moneyif we can find
any, that is.

God wouldnt want yall to treat poor Mama like that, Lonnie
sniffled, his face screwing up and his throat tightening. Shes away
up there with Jesus now.

Shove off, you stupid dope! Regina shrieked. Right here and
now were gonna get paid back for all those whippings she gave us
when we were little.

You didnt even love your own mama, after all she done for you?
Lonnie lamented.
Well, she sure as hell didnt do much for you, Lonnie! She told me
once she wished sheda sold you at a yard sale when you were
born, cause you dont act like a real man!

Lonnie For Lunch

Lonnie refused to listen to any more. Crestfallen, he left the house,

looking wounded as his siblings laughed behind his back.

Up in the invisible heavenly places, Sylvia looked down, gnashing

her teeth. That girl needs a good slap upside the head, and so
does Jeff, picking on poor Lonnie! At least hes showing respect for
his own mama!

Unlike the others, Lonnie is not far from the Kingdom, Angel said.
Jesus promised heaven only to those who are childlike enough to
humble themselves to receive His grace and mercy. Lonnies heart,
unlike that of his brothers and sisters, has not yet hardened like
concrete. And the irony doesnt escape me, Sylvia. This is the first
time ever that youve sided with the lonely outcast instead of the
crowd which persecutes him.

When Sylvia couldnt think of any reply to that, Angel persisted: Is

it true what Regina said about your making that particular remark?

Cant remember, Sylvia muttered.

A new scene flashed on the monitor. Sylvia was making a big fuss
about a birthday present Regina presented to her over one of their
girls day out lunches.

Just look at this gorgeous teardrop pendant, and these dainty

earrings! Sylvia gushed. Is this real jade jewelry?

Sure is, ordered it online from China. Its pretty, aint it, Mama? It
matches your eyes.

Ive always wanted jade jewelry! I swear, youre the best in the
bunch!

Reginas private thought, hidden behind her greasy grin: Well, Id

better be, Mama. Once your ticker gives out I expect something
back from you.

That hurts! Sylvia blubbered, getting no consolation from Angel.

As much as this? he cried, pointing at the following scene.

Regina patted her mothers hand. Youll always be precious to me,
Mama. What else you gonna get for your birthday?

Not much, I guess. The others are coming over to my house for a
pizza party after work. Lonnie said he was building me a bird house
for the back yard. Oh, I guess thats better than nothing. You do
know Lonnie quit his job because a few kids hassled the hell out of
him. One of em set off a stink bomb in the rear end of the bus.

Oh, Mama! Regina cackled. I just love the way you tell a story!

Well, anyhow, Lonnie gets up and goes to the back of the bus but
cant find any evidence of what set the smell off, so he gives those
stupid kids the benefit of the doubt. And so the next day it got
worse. They sprayed the whole back end of the bus with Squirty
Gum. They pasted stickers all over the windows. And then Lonnie
catches one guy smearing lipstick all over the back window and tells
him to wipe it off. That youngun was twice as big as Lonnie and
threatened to put him off the bus if he didnt stop hassling him
about defacing government property.

What then, Mama?

Some kid made a vulgar wisecrack about Lonnie and got the whole
bus to laughing. Then they started shooting a squirt gun full of Coke
at the back of his head. Lonnie stood up and yelled that they could
get in a big wreck if they didnt stop hassling him. I swear, Regina,
if it wasnt frogs turned loose in the aisle, or those goony birds
flashing supersonic laser lights on Lonnies windshield, it was some
unearthly racket downloaded on somebodys cell phone. But Lonnie
got to where he dreaded going to work. His nerves got so bad he
quit, and now hes on disability. All because of a few normal
teenage kids that were only having a bit of fun.

Regina gave her a catty smile. So poor Lonnies broke and cant
buy you a decent present? Poor people have to be creative, dont
they? I just dont know why Lonnie cant roll with the punches and
take life like a man. Its a good thing he didnt get married and have
kids of his own, theyda driven him crazy. Look at me, Im a dental
assistant with two sweet children and all kinds of job benefits.

And Im proud of you, honey. Lonnies always been sort of slow,

never reached for the stars. Hes jumpy as a jackrabbit, Sylvia
moaned. Ill never know where he got it from, either. Not from
me. If only hed grab the bull by the horns and apply himself, he
could amount to something. He doesnt even try to ask a girl out
on a date.

Regina smirked. Oh well, Mama. In this world youve got the

winners and the losers. Do you think theres something wrong with
Lonnie, Mama? Is that why he doesnt act like the rest of us?

This is a cruel world and a hard one to live in, Sylvia said. When
I think of all the times Lonnie embarrassed me and his daddy by
coming home crying about all the boys at school picking on him. A
real man fights back. He doesnt go crying to his mama and daddy.
I remember Randy tried to teach Lonnie how to box. Bought him a
punching bag and taught him some fancy footwork. Well, one day
Randy tripped over and shoved Lonnie into the punching bag.
Lonnie got a nosebleed from it and from that day on, he never tried
to box again. Lonnie kept coming home with bruises and black eyes
till Randy went to school and hollered at the principal and
threatened to take the whole school district to court over it. At
least my other three boys are masculine enough to fight back.

Well, no wonder nobody bothers them, Mama, theyre as big as a

house.

Sylvia clasped Reginas hand. Lonnies different than his brothers.

They go hunting, but Lonnie loves animals and birds. He never
showed much interest in football or any other manly activity. Hed
rather be in the kitchen cooking, or out in the garden growing
things. You dont think hes, well you know

Regina blushed. I hope not, Mama. For his sake I hope not.

Picking at her salad, Sylvia lamented, If thats true, Regina, he

would have been better off if hed died right after I had him. Hell
end up drowning in his own tears. Any man who doesnt like
football must be warped deep down in his soul.

You seem to have enjoyed eating other people for lunch, Sylvia,
Angel said with a frosty stare. And your concept of masculinity was
what was warped in that scenario. Lonnie was forced from that
employment because no one backed up his authority as bus driver
and because everyone he complained to laughed about sin instead
of punishing it. Let us now see what your other children are doing
this very moment.

Vulgar Vultures
Hey, I found me fifty bucks in this old purse! Greedy Garvin called,
standing next to Sylvias vanity, where shed spent hours doctoring
up her wrinkles before logging onto dating sites where she got only
a few nibbles.

Regina scowled. Waste of time coming over here. Barely enough

cash to pay our gas. Even her jewelrys a pile of junk.

Guess we could take all her **** down to that flea market in
Athens, Jeff muttered, taking a swig of Mountain Dew. I could
load up the best of the furniture in my pickup, along with all her
best clothes. Just give the rest of this **** to the Goodwill Store.
Later, I could haul her old horse to the Humane Society, no sense
selling it. I doubt anybodyd want to ride the fleabitten old nag.

Could donate it to a glue factory, Stroup howled.

I get her I-Pad! Jeff yelled, pulling it out from under a TV table.

No fair! Stacy squealed frantically. I aint even got one and you
got two already!

The tiny woman leaped from the bed onto Jeffs back and wrestled
with him, trying to take the device. Garvin goosed Jeffs neck with
his fat fist and tried to yank Stacy off his back. After a long three-
way tussle the I-Pad flew out of Jeffs hands, crashed into a
bedroom window, and broke it.

Now see what yall done, idiots! Jeff yelled. I bet the damn
things all broke now! And if we keep smashin up this house
nobody in their right mindll buy it off of us!

I was gonna rip up the floorboards to try and find Mamas secret
nest egg, Garvin called.

You better not, or Ill whack you upside the head! Jeff hollered
back. If we turn this joint into a hog pen, we wont be able to give
it away to the realtor!

Jeff cackled like a mean monkey. Coulda just buried the old hag
underneath the floorboards instead of makin all this fuss. When
he started caterwauling Im walkin the floor over you, they all
cracked up.

I get all the jewelry money! Stacy cried.

Not on your life! Stroup barked. Mamas moonstone cameo, if
we ever find it, must be worth at least two grand.

CHILL! Regina yelled. Im the oldest and I say we just sell all
this **** and split the dough up five ways. We dont have to be
selfish like Mama.

The others grumbled it was okay with them.

Hey, Im starved! Garvin called, patting his broad belly. Lets go

get some food. Then well get Sam and Pete to bring their pickups
over so we can clear this house out before Mamas long-lost
relatives come by and hog everything.

Know what? Regina said. Since that old bitch was so mean to
Daddy and all of us when we were kids, I dont want nothin to do
with her funeral arrangements. Well let the county take care of her
carcass, cause she never did buy no burial insurance.

Stroup grinned evilly. Thatll save us a wad of cash. Of course,

Uncle Lonnie or Aunt May could buy Mama a grave marker if they
want to.

No way, Stacy laughed. Mama had one hell of a falling out with
all her relatives after Granny died and left a few dollars. They all
fought like cats and dogs over every stick of furniture Granny had,
and all Mamas kinfolk ended up hating Mama worse than we did.

Last Saturday I swung by the Jelly Belly Bar and sang karaoke and
anyhow, some big agent from Hollywood come up to me, and that
ol boy signed me up to sing in Hollywood, Jeff bragged.

You aint dunnit! Stacy shrieked, punching his arm.

Jeff shoved her away. Just you wait and see! Ill make enough
money to buy that whole cemetery for Mama.

Hell, I wouldnt waste a nickel on her, Stroup drawled.

Lets go, Garvin said. Im cavin in, Im so hungry.

Yeah, I gotta go, Regina yawned, shoving one of Sylvias pearl

necklaces in her tote bag. Rosco and the kids are waiting in the
car. Theyre all hungry for dinner too.
Speakin of cars, Garvin drawled, wonder if therell be a legal
tussle to get the title of her car transferred over so we can squeeze
twenty grand out of it.

Shoot fire! Jeff guffawed, fiddling with his baseball cap. That old
wreck aint worth two hundred. Its ugly as sin and no one in their
right mind would be seen drivin it!

Stroup scowled. I worked on that old junk wagon just the other
day. Mama was so damn selfish, she drove up the mileage so much
it aint worth a can of beans.

After a big hubbub of belly laughs, Sylvias precious children filed

out the door and piled into their own cars to head off for Bubbas
Barbecue Barn to celebrate their windfall.

From her high vantage point Sylvias departed soul felt the crushing
weight of rejection and betrayal.

A Merciless Mother

Not a one of em loved me! Sylvia wailed. None of em but

Lonnie and the others just wanted my stuff! Why?

Because of your hypocrisy, Angel said coolly. You were a so-

called Sunday Christian. Let us take a look at this scene from your
past:

Theres me, in the boys bedroom, when we lived in Huntersville,

Sylvia gasped.

Sit still! Sylvia scolded little Stroup. My lord, I never saw such a
rats nest! Furiously she tugged at his unruly thatch of yellow hair
with a fine-tooth comb. Tears formed in the childs eyes.

Stop that sniveling! Sylvia snapped. Big boys dont cry around
here and girls better not cry unless theyve got a darn good
reason!

Mama, Garvin called from the closet, my white shirts got ketchup
on it. Can I wear my Bat Man T-shirt?

No, Garvin! You have to show respect in the house of the Lord!
Now sit still, Stroup, or Ill tan your britches!

Regina came in crying. Mama, Lonnie got in my lipstick and

smeared it all over my vanity mirror!
Sylvia flung down the comb and went to lay into Lonnie. After she
walloped him with a fly swatter a few times she warned, Now you
see here, boy, if you keep that up, Jesus wont love you any more
and Hell get the boogerman after you!

Lonnie certainly didnt learn about the real Jesus from his mother,
Angel said reproachfully. Before it became a federal crime for
teachers to share their faith with school children, one of Lonnies
teachers taught him about how kind and gentle the Savior really
was with children. She left a lasting positive impression on his little
mind. But in many ways you counteracted her good influence.
Watch now.

The last revival service of the year had just adjourned. Lonnie
stood over by the baptistry, overhearing some of his mothers
conversation with Rita Sanders, the elders wife.

Oh, Rita, Im so proud of my children! Isnt it a miracle? I

persuaded all of them to go forward to accept Christ as their Savior.
Even Lonnie went up to pray.

The older woman raised her eyebrows. Are you sure theyre really
saved, Sylvia?

They must be saved, Rita. Theyre real happy now.

Lonnie walked over, grinning. Sure were happy, Sister Sanders!

Mama said shed take us out to McDonalds if we went up there so
you could all watch us get saved.

Out to the car! Sylvia shouted, red as a beet. Boy, you just wait
till I get you home, and you wont get any supper tonight! If
youre gonna act this way in church Ill leave you with your lazy
daddy to watch football!

But Mama, Lonnie sniveled, you did promise and I just did what
you told me to! Whyre you so mad at me?

Those kids got a bellyful of burger and a bellyful of your phony

religion, Sylvia, the angel fumed. You turned the Good News into
the goofy news. My, how that story circulated through that gossip-
hungry church! Many called that their best revival ever! No
wonder your children never came to know the Lord Jesus as Savior.
You turned the very idea of conversion to Christ into a rite of
passage to achieve social respectability!
But thats no excuse for the way they ransacked my home and said
wicked things about their own mother! Sylvia wailed. How could
anybody treat a human being like that when they cant do nothing
about it?

Angel shrugged. Well, Sylvia, didnt you do the same to Trina?

Well, thats different.

Hows it different?

Trina wasnt my kin so I could treat her any old way I wanted to.

God didnt see it that way, Sylvia. You robbed Trina of her life. But
more importantly, you robbed Christ of the chance to be her Savior.
And you robbed God of the chance to fulfill His purposes in her life.

Destined For Dishonor

Sylvias face hardened in spiritual blindness. Well, if Trina was so

all-fired important to God why didnt He step in to stop us from
hassling her?

That is His concern. Angels dont know everything, Angel replied.

But this scripture passage might provide a clue for at least part of
the answer:

Rom.9:22: Hath not the potter power over the clay, of the same
lump to make one vessel unto honour, and another unto dishonour?
22 What if God, willing to shew his wrath, and to make his power
known, endured with much longsuffering the vessels of wrath fitted
to destruction:

Well pause to ask this question, Sylvia. Do you know what a

vessel is?

Sure I do. Its tubes in the body that carry blood, isnt it?

Vessels contain blood, true. But vessel is old terminology to

signify any type of container. In this context vessel refers to a cup
which receives the pouring out of something, which in this case
means the terrible wrath of God. This scripture correlates with
Gods warning in Romans not to be a vessel of wrath, or a cup into
which God pours His wrath.

Rev.14:9: And the third angel followed them, saying with a loud
voice, If any man worship the beast and his image, and receive his
mark in his forehead, or in his hand,
10 The same shall drink of the wine of the wrath of God, which is
poured out without mixture into the cup of his indignation; and he
shall be tormented with fire and brimstone in the presence of the
holy angels, and in the presence of the Lamb:

In this passage, those who worship the Antichrist are useful to God
only by serving as receptacles of His fierce wrath, said Angel. Just
like a pile of firewood serves people by being burned. Those who
defy God to serve the devil end up bringing glory to God in the
wrong way. In the future fulfilment of this prophetic passage,
Christians who were unjustly murdered by persecutors will glorify
God for His perfect justice in pouring out His wrath upon sinful
mankind. Jesus Himself says to His enemies in Matthew 23:32: Fill
ye then up the measure of your fathers. Also, in Genesis 15:16 God
tells Abraham that He will not yet punish the Amorites because their
iniquity was not yet full. These wicked sinners had yet to fully
manifest the depravity of their evil human natures. In Ezekiel 38:16
God declares to Gog, another wicked nation, that he would be
sanctified, or seen as holy, through their destruction.

Trina existed at your school as a target for you to pour out your
wickedness on, so that in time to come God would prove Himself to
be utterly holy and just in pouring out His wrath into you, a vessel
of wrath prepared for destruction. You would not allow God to use
you as a vessel of honor in showing forth His love. So God will be
glorified in pouring out punishments upon you to demonstrate that
He, the Great Judge of all the earth, is altogether righteous in His
dealings with mankind.

The most important question you ought to have asked yourself is

this, Sylvia: Why you didnt do your Lords will and love your
neighbor after hearing this commandment of Christ preached from
the pulpit untold thousands of times? Those who knew their Lords
will and did it not will be beaten much more severely than those
who didnt know any better. Read this passage which is just now
appearing on the monitor:

Rom. 11:22: Well; because of unbelief they were broken off, and
thou standest by faith. Be not highminded, but fear:
21 For if God spared not the natural branches, take heed lest he
also spare not thee.
22 Behold therefore the goodness and severity of God: on them
which fell, severity; but toward thee, goodness, if thou continue in
his goodness: otherwise thou also shalt be cut off.
Where in this passage does Paul teach unconditional eternal
security for those who come to Christ and then desert Him? Angel
asked.

Sylvias teeth were rattling. She clutched her head, struggling for
composure. She wished she could wake up from this awful dream.

Angel continued, Despite all your busy church activities, Sylvia, the
fact remains you broke the heart of Gods law, the ONE
commandment upon which everything else taught by Christ hinges:
Love one another. Romans 13:8 states that if you love one another,
youve fulfilled the law of Christ. If you love your neighbor, you
wont want to hurt him in any way, but will ever seek his good. You
broke that law, Sylvia, when you reasoned in your wicked heart that
your day of judgment was a very long way off, if it ever came at all,
so you would abuse anyone you felt like hurting. You disobeyed
Pauls warning that you must continue in Gods goodness or else
youll be cut off. This warning is confirmed by Christ Himself. Turn
your head to the monitor and look at the message, Sylvia, if you
dare.

John 15:4: Abide in me, and I in you. As the branch cannot bear
fruit of itself, except it abide in the vine; no more can ye, except ye
abide in me.
5 I am the vine, ye are the branches: He that abideth in me, and I
in him, the same bringeth forth much fruit: for without me ye can
do nothing.
6 If a man abide not in me, he is cast forth as a branch, and is
withered; and men gather them, and cast them into the fire, and
they are burned.

Did your pastor ever preach this passage, Sylvia?

She looked dumbly at the angel. Not that I know of. He believed
in uplifting, positive messages.

Do you know the meaning of that passage, Sylvia?

Feigning ignorance, she shook her head.

What about this one?

Matt.7: 16 Ye shall know them by their fruits. Do men gather grapes

of thorns, or figs of thistles?
17 Even so every good tree bringeth forth good fruit; but a corrupt
tree bringeth forth evil fruit.
18 A good tree cannot bring forth evil fruit, neither can a corrupt
tree bring forth good fruit.
19 Every tree that bringeth not forth good fruit is hewn down, and
cast into the fire.
20 Wherefore by their fruits ye shall know them.

You did not abide in Christ, Sylvia. If you had, the sweet sap of His
love and life would have permeated your own life. You would have
borne sweet fruit unto God as you spread His love all around you.
Instead, you brought forth thorns which injured others. You were a
rotten tree who bore rotten fruit to poison other peoples lives. Here
is another example of failure to bear good fruit:

Jeremiah 29:17: 17 Thus saith the LORD of hosts; Behold, I will

send upon them the sword, the famine, and the pestilence, and will
make them like vile figs, that cannot be eaten, they are so evil.
18 And I will persecute them with the sword, with the famine, and
with the pestilence, and will deliver them to be removed to all the
kingdoms of the earth, to be a curse, and an astonishment, and an
hissing, and a reproach, among all the nations whither I have driven
them:
19 Because they have not hearkened to my words, saith the LORD,
which I sent unto them by my servants the prophets, rising up early
and sending them; but ye would not hear, saith the LORD.

Because of their wicked ways, these people were rotten fruit which
angered the Lord greatly, Angel said. They were unsavory figs
which couldnt be eaten. In modern terminology, they left a bad
taste in Gods mouth, and He was about to clobber these
unrepentant souls.

Sylvias Last Stand

Youre rotten fruit, Sylvia. Thats the reason you cant go through
those gates.

But I did get saved Sylvia sputtered angrily. And every night I
whispered a bedtime prayer for forgiveness for anything I might
have done wrong during the day.

We have just viewed conclusive proof there was no true repentance

in your wretched life for the way you treated others, Sylvia. You
dont mouth an insincere prayer for Gods forgiveness and then turn
around the next minute and giggle with your pals about the same
sin you supposedly repented of. To repent means you turn around
and forsake the paths of sin to go home to the Fathers House.
Youve heard the Parable of the Prodigal Son preached before, Im
sure.

Sure I did, Angel. Every time we held a revival that was one of our
favorite Bible stories to get people to come forward to get saved.

Your pastor overlooked one vital point, Sylvia. The man who came
to his senses and returned home to His father was already a son.
He was already a member of the Fathers family. Unconverted
sinners are not yet part of the Fathers family. Instead, James 4:4
says that whoever is a friend of the world is Gods ENEMY! The
Prodigal Son was seeking reconciliation with his Father through
repentance, to return to fellowship hed already enjoyed with the
Father before leaving home. And as for being Gods enemy, you
renounced Christ by choosing sides with wicked people who hurt the
weak and defenseless. YOU REPENTED OF YOUR REPENTANCE AND
BECAME A FRIEND OF THE WORLD, THUS BECOMING GODS
ENEMY!! the furious angel shouted.

You treated your one-time profession of faith in Christ like a

convenient, quickie vaccination against going to hell. Just go up
front to fetch your free fire insurance policy and forget about
everything else Christ taught, Angel said. Well, it doesnt work
that way, Sylvia. You cant cut out the one or two verses you love
and throw out the rest of the Bible. Those who misled you about
this will share in the same punishment you must now receive. It is
written in Galatians 6:8, For he that soweth to his flesh shall of the
flesh reap corruption; but he that soweth to the Spirit shall of the
Spirit reap life everlasting.

You sowed to your fallen flesh nature, Sylvia. The flesh craves
excitement. The flesh takes pleasure in the pain of other people.
The ancient Romans gathered to see bloody spectacles in the
Colosseum. Do you think they shed a single tear of compassion as
they watched people being torn apart by wild beasts?

I guess not, Sylvia said vacantly. But Angel, cant God give me a
second chance?

While Trina didnt even get a first chance, thanks to you? Angel
said roughly.

Well, couldnt Trina open her own Bible and read what was in it?
Sylvia blubbered.

Trina didnt own a Bible, and she didnt even want to get one!
Angel said roughly. Your cruel treatment of Trina drove her away
from God because you claimed to represent Him If you upset Trina
so badly she could barely understand her school books, how much
harder would it have been for her to understand the King James
Bible! You and other professing believers were the ONLY Bible Trina
ever read. You and your evil friends willfully and maliciously
destroyed another soul made in the image of God. Not only did you
give Trina nightmares, you and others like her were her nightmare.
You cheerfully did the devils work so youll get a devils reward for
doing it. God is a fair Paymaster, and Hes just signed, sealed and
delivered your paycheck. But you cant spend it up here.

Go join your friends down in hell and see if theyre able to save you
from the awful horrors you shall reap from the seeds you planted in
the lives of those you abused. Sow mean seeds and reap an eternal
whirlwind of meanness and cruelty forevermore. Even if you join
like-minded souls in hell you will be unable to enjoy their company
because everyone down there hates and mistrusts everyone else,
and looks for ways to vent that bitter enmity. No love exists in hell,
only hatred expressed in a thousand fearful forms. There you will
spend a long, lonely eternity without the Love of God you rejected
in your daily life.

Uh oh, Sylvia muttered. Whos gonna keep me company there?

Oh, Angel, please dont send me down to the same hell Randys in!
Dont do that to me!

Why shouldnt I, Sylvia? Youre the stumbling block who tripped

Randy and caused him to fall down there.

******

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