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The FIRO-B Instrument

Fundamental Interpersonal Relationship Orientation-


Behavior

Understanding your
results

Claudia Fernandez, DrPH, RD, LDN

What does the FIRO-B tell me?

z A practical tool that helps you understand


how your behaviors might be interpreted in
organizational settings.

z Interpersonal behaviors are related to the


dynamic of what we express towards others
and want from others.

Where did it come from?

Supported by US
Government during the
Korean war.

Helped the Navy


understand how to put
Who gets the key to the
people together into
nuclear missiles?
high stress situations.

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The FIRO-B addresses 3 aspects of interaction
between you & others

Inclusion Who will you select to interact with?


How does the initial phase of interaction work out?
Control:
Who directs the flow of interaction?
How do the parameters of that interaction get set?
Affection
How OPEN is the interaction with another?
What is the nature of support in that interaction?

There is a cycle to how interactions evolve


between people
Control
As interaction between

Inclusion people start out Affection/


Support
As an interaction
between people ends
Inclusion Affection/
Support
Control

What is INCLUSION about?

Inclusion Ignore them


A person walks into the room.
What behaviors do you do to help
that person feel included?
Wave
Make eye contact

motion them over: Introduce them


“hey, sit here!”

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What is INCLUSION about?

With all of these behaviors you are sending


signals that they are IMPORTANT: key
words—belonging, involvement,
participation, recognition, distinction.

What is CONTROL about?

Share goals and objectives

How does the interaction


FLOW between people?
How is there control over
who speaks and when?
Make eye contact
It’s about cueing others
Take notes..or not Call on someone
Raise your hand
Jump in!
Stand up

What is CONTROL about?

With all of these behaviors you are directing the


interaction between people: key words—
power, authority, influence, responsibility,
consistency.

3
What is AFFECTION about?

How do you express support, Dove Bars!


encouragement, or appreciation
for others?
How do you acknowledge
Thank them
the contribution of another?
How was your
I liked your weekend?
presentation! Employee of the Month

Applaud!
Hug or handshake

What is AFFECTION about?

With all of these behaviors you are sending


signals of personal worth—it’s close and
personal. Key words: personal ties,
consensus, sensitivity, support, openness.

Just a little more about these


behaviors…

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What happens when it’s too much, or
too little, of the behaviors?
Too little Too much
Get stuck, don’t
Inclusion People might perceive
progress, lose
you as a cold fish,
credibility
“prickly” or abrupt

Chaos reigns or your Others feel left out,


Control agenda goes by the lectured to, their
wayside ideas aren’t invited

People feel their work People are


Affection or contribution is uncomfortable, at the
unappreciated, they extreme—sexual
are a cog in the wheel harassment lawsuits

How does the instrument assess


all of this?
2 aspects of interpersonal interaction:
wanted and expressed

Of including, controlling and


expressing encouragement in
FREQUENCY
interaction with others

NUMBER OF With whom you express or


want these behaviors
PEOPLE

Think about how you assess your own behaviors: mark


Frequent, Situational or Seldom as you think about your
behaviors in each category

Expressed Wanted
How often do you seek
How often do you
people out? How many
Inclusion people do you seek?
want others to seek
you out?
How often do you How often do you let
direct the flow of others direct the flow
Control situations? Is this with of situations? Is this
many people or a few? with many people or a
few?
How often do you How often do you
Affection express warmth or want support from
support? others?

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What do the scores mean?

0-2 You are pretty selective and display these behaviors


on rare occasions to a few people

You are pretty situational in these behaviors,


3-6 displaying them with some people

You express these behaviors with with many people,


7-9 much of the time

What does it mean to have high vs.


low scores?

High Scores: You have a bigger


pond with more fish in it

Low Scores: You have a But either way


smaller pond with fewer fish you have a
pond with fish
in it!

Use this insight into your behaviors with


others

How do your behaviors potentially MEET


the needs of others?

How do they MISS the needs of others?

What are the intended consequences of your


behaviors?
What are the unintended
consequences of your behaviors?

What kind of feedback do you get from others?

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Insights from the FIRO-B:
If you have…
HIGH Wanted LOW Wanted
Then you may perceive Then you may perceive

Lack of acknowledgement Most invitations as


Inclusion as negative, rejections as obligatory, group time as
devastating, being away as wasteful
“missing the action”
Any control as too much;
Any structuring as inadequate, plans and structures as
Control standard procedures as pressure, competitive
comforting behavior as annoying
Reassurances as superficial,
Lack of expressed concern
personal questions as
Affection as insensitive, infrequent
intrusive, emotions as
feedback frustrating
distracting/trying

Example insights from the FIRO-B I


>4 pt difference: aware that you
This person might be either initiate/want more interaction
a do-it-yourself from others

I C A
Expressed 6 7 6 19
Wanted 6 1 5 12
Sometimes
they invite you
to lunch, 12 8 11 31
sometimes they
31—that’s a moderate amount of energy put into
want to be
relationships, the higher the score the more
invited
likely they are to be gregarious

Example insights from the FIRO-B II


When warm and close it’s Probably pretty satisfied
with family members and with their wants and gets
close friends in interpersonal actions

I C A
Expressed 1 2 3 6
Wanted 5 2 1 8
This person
might feel left 6 4 4 14
out—they want
to be included 14-a selectively social person who is probably
but who an MBTI introvert
knows?

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What if you worked with this person?
Will this person feel comfortable talking to you? Feel
important? As though you think they are competent?
How can you express behaviors to
connect, motivate, influence and lead
this person?

I C A
Expressed 9 4 9 22
Wanted 9 2 8 19
This person
wants everyone
18 6 17 41
to come along
and doesn’t 41—a very social person who is probably and
want to miss extravert and very gregarious: the Julie McCoy-
out Love Boat Cruise Director type

A lot is required of effective leadership!


Leaders need to understand
themselves, their needs, The
beliefs, biases,
& perspectives Art
of it
Leaders need to know their
organizations, the culture, and how is
targeted others operate (their needs,
beliefs, biases, perspectives)
here

Leaders need to be able to sublimate their needs, beliefs,


biases, & perspectives to meet those of others & move
their agenda forward…all while remaining authentic
and comfortable in their own skin

FSLI 2007
So what does your group look like?

e 4.4 3.85 3.65 11.85

w 3.7 4.2 5.15 13.05

8.1 8.05 8.8 24.9

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But there is SO much more….

z The FIRO-B can be a great tool to help you work


together better in an environment of tolerance
support, where people are different and working on a
common goal.

z BUT it can also help you understand some of the


deeper aspects of WHY you interact with others in
the way you do…

FIRO-B is based on Self Concept

Significance Competence
(Inclusion) (Control)
co
nc
A sense of self e pt A sense that we can
belonging to the act, decide and
world, that one’s direct our actions
presence matters successfully, leading
leading to behaviors Lovability to behaviors of
related to inclusion control.
(Affection)
A sense that we are lovable, deserving of love and being
loved, seeking connection with others, leading to
behaviors related to affection and openness.

The Iceberg Model of Understanding


Inclusion

•How do I approach others?


•How do I want them to
approach me?
Above the water line

Below the water line


•How significant do I really feel?
•Do I feel involved here? Important?
•Do my ideas matter at all?
•Do I belong?

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The Iceberg Model of Understanding
Control
•What kind of direction/cueing do I want to give others?
•What kind of direction/cueing do I want others to give to
me?

Above the water line

Below the water line


•How competent do I really feel?
•Do others see me as competent?
•Do I think others are competent?
• Do I over control the situation because of my
feelings about the competence of myself or
others?

The Iceberg Model of Understanding


Affection

•What kind of connection do I want to have with others?


•What kind of support and encouragement do I show and do I
want?
Above the water line

Below the water line


•Do I fail to show emotional support towards
others because I don’t feel a strong sense
of my own worth?
•Do I seek a lot of connection with others to
bolster my sense of self-worth?

Summing up….

What are your insights from the


FIRO-B instrument?
How can these insights impact
how you work on your teams?

How can these insights help you feel


more satisfied about your interactions
with others?

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How to start to interpret
your scores

How to start to interpret


your 12 scores

1. Look at your summative scores


• The overall need score—high, med, low?
• How are Total Expressed and Total Wanted
related?
2. Look at your Expressed vs. Wanted scores
• For Inclusion
• For Control Relationship between them
• For Affection Any discrepancy?
Where?

How to start to interpret your


12 scores, con’t

3. Look at your relative sum scores


• Which has the highest total need (I,C,A)?
• Which has the lowest total need (I,C,A)?
FIRO-B Theory poses that these totals
represent, respectively, the need one is
most likely to pursue
How does this play out in your day-to-day
encounters?

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How to start to interpret your
scores, con’t

4. Look at each of the 6 Need scores


• Are they high, medium, or low?
• What does this suggest about your pattern of
interpersonal behavior?

5. How do the 6 needs affect each other?


• How do they combine to define and explain a unique
interpersonal style?

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