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Lon Wurmser (1993): The Riddle of Masochism uncommittedly summarized by Christof Wahner

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Lon Wurmser (1993): The Riddle of Masochism uncommittedly summarized by Christof Wahner

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K.K. Novick & J. Novick bring a general, functional definition: "Masochism is the active pursuit of psychological or physiological pain, trouble or humiliation for the purpose of adaptation, defense or drive satisfaction." However, clinical masochism is the unconscious need to seek for pain, trouble and humiliation and to sabotage the chances of own success, in the hope that mercy & attention (distorted, inferior forms of love & respect) can be thus achieved. [p. 38] Masochistic pathology arises from the compulsive imagination of being entitled to gain lust, contentment, happiness and success only for the frightful price of trouble, whereas "normal" masochism is willing to put up with pain for conscious and rational reasons aiming at a higher purpose, especially at love & respect. Generally, the four types of masochism together form a complex, but individually they appear with different emphasis [p. 41]: - relational masochism (outer masochism): sacrificism, self-abasement, search for tormenting partners & circumstances in life, slave mentality - moral masochism (inner masochism): addiction to pain & trouble, moral contraint, mystical experience of redemption through pain - sexual masochism: sexual satisfaction linked to symbolic or actual pain & humiliation - narcisstist facade: inside out converted masochism in form of cruelty & egoism, in delusional dreams such as: "Lay down your love onto the floor, so I can walk on her while she penetrates me like knives." [p. 144] Logically speaking,"pathology in superego" (moral masochism) comes prior to the "pathology in object relations" (relational masochism). R. Stoller 1991: Broady spoken, perversion is "the erotic expression of hate". Equally perverse is the eroticization of might & violence respectively helplessness & submissiveness. Masochists are afraid of their own might including the might of their feelings, needs, motives, fantasies, etc. After A. Cooper 1991, the core of masochistic perversion is: to become a passive, manipulated, dead, and deformed object of an evil-minded person, ... in fact with intent, in this paradoxical manner to evade the fear of infantile passivity & helplessness. masochists' credo: "Only when being delivered and convicted as victim, and only when admitting defeat, I can experience lust and feelings of being loved." "Self-castration" in various respects puts the ideal of emotional inviolability & invulnerability into practice as well as the ban on love & mourning. After Kernberg 1991, love is thus utilized as a vicarious agent of aggression, namely of abasement. A. Cooper 1988 summarized S. Freud's hypotheses about masochism: 1. Masochism bases on excessive stimulation of lust & pain. 2. Sadism is its primary impulse, which turns against the Self under certain circumstances. 3. Masochism is a fundamental component of the death drive. 4. The masochistic need for punishment results from excessive strictness of superego. 5. For masochists, trouble is the condition for lust, but not its source. 6. There is an understanding of masochism related to feminine traits such as passive and reactive tendencies, pain tolerance etc. However, this masochism should be rather seen as a caricature of femininity. Loewenstein 1957: The masochistic perversions are modified repetitions of infantile situations and scenes, in which sexual fantasies, erotic plays or indirect sexual overtures towards forbidden objects (especially towards the mother) have met with disapproval and rejection.

Lon Wurmser (1993): The Riddle of Masochism uncommittedly summarized by Christof Wahner

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The "seduction of the aggressor" which can be found in all children, already contains the elements of a later, actually masochistic behavior: the exploration of situations causing danger, fear and pain, and their mitigation through a loving, erotic complicity with the threatening person whose attention is bought through suffering. Often it is even the same wether the attention is of positive or negative character. Masochists deny their drive-related needs by overemphasizing the importance of their object relations. Accordingly, the opposite applies to sadists. Both in the cases of sexual and moral masochism, the own desire is too weak and blocked by the superego, so that it needs external force. In this context, the motto is "Dear policeman, help me to lose control and make me a criminal!" p. 60: In the <Studies on Hysteria>, Freud speaks of the "counter-will" in terms of a "possession" thwarting the intentions of the conscious personality. F. Nietzsche (<Human, All Too Human>): "There is a defiance against oneself, and to its manifestations belong some forms of asceticism. Certain people have, indeed, such a high need for exercising their power and domination, so that in the absence of other objects or because of continuous lack of success otherwise they finally enjoy bullying certain parts of their own being ..." B. Berliner 1947: "In the history of every masochistic patient we find an unhappy childhood, and frequently to such an extreme degree, so that we have to ask ourselves, to what extent the development of a masochistic character means a protection against a schizophrenic or depressive psychosis." After L. Shengold, the circle of experience in overwhelming overstimulation by traumatization is experienced as absorbing, devouring, cannibalistic. J. Chassegnet-Smirgel deems appropriate for trauma patients to convert the narcissistic wound (that can not be removed) into sexual arousal which can be discharged, while the self-esteem is protected by the accompanying fantasies of revenge, hatred and self-assertion. In general, pathological masochism is causally linked to severe traumatization in terms of the experience "to live better with pain than to lose one's object". Vicious circle of separation from primary caregivers in the view of masochistic dynamics [p. 88]: separation guilt, fear of punishment search for love & closeness self-abandonment loss of self shame alienation separation Francis Bronek mentioned as sources of shame: 1. personal experiences of ineffectiveness, especially when trying to develop mutually satisfactory intersubjectivity and common sense 2. self-objectification and self-alienation (primary dissociation) by ignoring, disdaining and denying one's own status as subject Critical to this objectification is the denial of individuality under the dominion of an inhumanly inflated sense of duty. 3. episodic or chronic experience of being treated loveless, of being discarded or used as a scapegoat by primary caregivers W. Grossmann 1991: Traumatizations often affect the capacity of imagination and sabotage the transformation of traumatic experience through productive mental activity. Instead, traumatizations establish situation reruns and obsession with images that repeat and undo the traumatic experience at the same time. Additionally or alternatively, inhibition, avoidance, and withdrawal serve as attempts to avoid painful repetition of a traumatic condition. Conscience represents two opposing pillars of moral evaluation, in other words "sense of justice": justice subordination as a member of a community to protect bounds & needs of other people Violation of this elementary value causes guilt. preventive inversion through resentment reputation self-assertion and self-affirmation to protect bounds & needs of one's own Violation of this elementary value causes shame*. preventive inversion through contempt & derision * usually accompanied by resentment and revenge, in order to compensate the oppressive feeling of helplessness

Lon Wurmser (1993): The Riddle of Masochism uncommittedly summarized by Christof Wahner

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Masochistic guilt applies to seeking to assert oneself at all, and to daring to say no and to offer resistance. Masochistic shame applies to having no self, and to being the victim of a soul murder and thus 'soulblind'. L. Shengold: soul murder = the deliberate attempt to wipe out or to compromise the specific identity of another person ... and to deprive the victim of the ability to feel joy and love as an independent person The masochistic complex of guilt and shame causes, that also and especially a psychotherapy itself can turn into a masochistic situation. The narcissistic imaginary world of transgression in all its facets is an "anti-shame strategy" in order to compensate an overwhelmingly strict superego. This includes, for instance, the idea or the desire to simultaneously belong to both sexes. B. Berliner 1947 depicts reasons of the masochistic character being so resistant: - the need to be loved by a frustrating love object - the urge to secretly punish this object This magic figure of thought sabotages any reality check and makes thus the pathological masochism so difficult to access. Separation in experience of reality leads to a cleavage of self and world (doubling of reality) including dramatic consequences such as credibility conflicts. - perceived reality; truth confirmed by the ego - reality either denying the trauma or representing a reality required by a totalitarian superego Dissociation = separation of acting and observing facets of the ego depersonalization double life (inner fight, dualism) of Triumph Zarathustra (figure) the Myth of Ulysses (self-assertion) Demand (rebellious, provocative, ruthless, criminal manners) actual emotions, the feeling of inner congruency in lust & pain enticing, boundless (narcissistic) imaginary world murderous "anti-shame self" versus Tragedy versus Friedrich Nietzsche (author) versus the Myth of Jesus Christ (self-desertion) versus Interdiction (well-behaved, obedient, sheepish, humble manners) versus external adaptation, the coercion "to do what has to be done" versus dungeon-like, outrageous (sadomasochistic) practice versus easily intimidated "shame-based self"

Allowing oneself in one's fancy more than one could have in reality versus Forbidding oneself in reality more than one should claim for oneself Freedom of choice in every respect, search of autonomy Exertion of one's own will versus Dependence on exterior influences, search of heteronomy versus Compulsivity of masochistic attachment

cf. the book of Lon Wurmser <Die zerbrochene Wirklichkeit> (The broken reality)

Lon Wurmser (1993): The Riddle of Masochism uncommittedly summarized by Christof Wahner

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K.K. Novick & J. Novick: The classical view is that the failure of omnipotence forces the child to turn itself to the reality. Our view, however, is that the failure of reality forces the child to turn itself to fantasies of omnipotence. Reality is caused by correspondence & attunement between signals of the child and responses from the caregiver. Efficient work on the pivital points of masochism and their review on any analytical level requires by all means, that the thread of fantasies of omnipotence is traced back to the roots and that the patient develops an alternative system of satisfaction by competent interaction. Delusions of destructive omnipotence serve as defence against feelings of helpless rage & humiliation and as pathological source of self-esteem. Poetry thrives on the power of imagery. The art of interpretation works through imagery. Transfer itself is a kind of imagery. [p. 93] All the ways of imagery are useful in terms of creative and therapeutic "deconstructive ego-splitting" in order to stop the "masochistic carousel". In the traditional view after S. Freud, the therapeutic process runs the following way: interpretation insight working through change John Cremerius inverted this logic often in the productive sense of action research: change working through interpretation insight A. Chekhov. "Regarding cure, it should be less about diseases than about their causes ... The main thing is to rearrange the life. Everything else is futile." The success factor when treating persistent neuroses consists in working moral conflicts up after the motto "exploring instead of judging". Frequently, complex formations of compromises are easily interpreted as "individual deficits" and separated from the situational context, so that such condemnations easily become a substantial part of the masochistic dynamics. Self-loyalty and self-actualization can be established only if external and especially internal conflicts are detected in full clarity and sharpness: conflicts of loyalty, conflicts of ambivalence (desiring & fearing the same thing at the same time), credibility conflicts, conflictive ego issues, superego conflicts, value conflicts, drive conflicts, suppression / denial / dilution / deflection / inheritance / generalization (association) of conflicts, avoidance of conflictive situations or certain decisions, avoidance of inner or outer confrontation, feelings of guilt (expectations, claims, interests) The more severe the inner conflicts are, - the more radical is the effort to suppress forbidden inclinations - the more brutal is the conscience - the more exceedling are the ideal requirements & territorial claims - the more problematic are the narcissistic weak points - the more primitive are the fantasies - the more distinctive are the resentments - the more extensive is the longing for masochistic might through suffering - the more absolute is the division into good and evil The dialectic approach of Lao Tse: "Do not battle! Take weakness and suffering and humiliation on you! However, throw off the yoke of [false] conscience from you, the yoke of [counterproductive] social and personal commitments." (from the chapter about <The Art of Ruling by Spontaneity>) The creative transformation of the masochistic dimension lies in the devotion to nature as a continuous becoming, in the focus on the natural aspects in the world, and in focusing on complementarity instead of conflictuality (contradiction, antagonism, opposition, contrariness) as a matter of principle.

Black Rose
Andrea Conrad 2009
I ache for coming face to face with the experience ... how you subject my whole life to your incomparably audacious, razor-sharp and biting dreams how all those dreams obsess myself with no remorse nor cease into the deepest sleep how my unconscious sleep serves you to unperceivedly put on my neck a tight and handsome collar how you then strap this collar to a leash and let me turn into the medium of your awesome will how you teach me to soundly sense your will so as to guess your faintest wishes without any words how any of your imperturbably demanding words subdue me downright by a crazy crash of thunder from your lips how all the tenderness and passion of my chaste and blushing lips bekiss your verily bewitching feet how your imperious, crushing feet stamp down my passions and my needs into the deepest ground how like a polished knife held to the throat this firmly crushed ground gives assurance and affectionate severity how that severity makes all my skin and soul so nice and sleek and shapes me by your fine and fierce handwriting how you teach me to write in beautiful handwriting virtuous, unambiguous words like "unconditional docility" how I enmesh myself in spite of my docility increasingly and hopelessly in any of your hundred thousand traps how you construct new traps for me time and again and how you barricade my ways with pretty heavy stones how I erect for you with all these stones and with those that you are throwing after me a fabulous, luxurious house how you then smash the cellar windows of this house and how you force me being nude to slide around on broken glass how all the broken glass is almost bleeding me to death, the more my wounds increase by your hilarious shepherd dog how you take me in place of this your shepherd dog and put me orderly just like a hardened criminal in weighty chains how all those chains become increasingly unbearable and rub in parts against my anyway already shining bones how you then stroke my bones with pleasure and with smashing bats and clubs as many times as they do break how you give me the glorious permission to arrange from all these bats and clubs my first and likewise final stake how for that nicely dressed up stake you give me scores and scores of legendary, doctrinary praise how all this praise out of your iron hand and your libidinous and lordly mouth is pouring down on me like rose oil how all this rose oil makes me more and more transmute into a markedly calamitous endangerment of fire how you - precisely due to this endangerment of fire utilize your unashamed delight of driving me to white heat how that white heat transforms me and my funeral edification finally into a serious, delirious sea of flames how I feel forced to burn up in that sea of flames, until no single part of me remains but dust and ashes how you sweep thoroughly my dust and ashes to the trash, as if I never have existed in entire life

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