The Carlton Chronicle

Editor: Sue Lovelace

18 July2001

BUTLER IN ORGY SEX ROMP SHOCK!

By Our Own Correspondent

Hot on the heels of Macbeth, rehearsals for Joe Orton's What The Butler Saw have been moving on apace under the guidance of Director Kristen Bowditch. No one can say that the Carlton rests on its laurels! Our correspondent caught up with the cast and crew at their rehearsal rooms last week to get the low-down on what the Butler really did see. When I arrived, the cast was the cast. I spoke with Mike in the process of a complete Tierney, who was practising run-through and most of climbing on and off the them appeared to be rather medical examination table. scantily dressed, which was "I have to be able to do this very exciting. I spoke to the with as little fuss as person in charge of lighting, possible", he explained. "It's who confided that he had the little details that can his work cut out to save the make all the difference to audience's blushes. Once the slickness of a the Director called "take performance". Ian Ward was five", I was able to speak to wearing a rather natty the actors themselves. Over sparkly dress. I asked him if coffee, Lucy Duncan told me it was one of his costumes. that she was concerned at "Oh no", he said. "I just like being typecast, after her wearing it". Throughout the performance in Macbeth as break, Val Foskett had, for a prostitute, and now to be some reason, been left in a running around the stage straitjacket. She smiled at half-naked. "I don't want to me and nodded in a friendly be seen as just a pretty way. Graham Parks was face", she said. "Oh don't trying on a pair of court worry about that", said Jeff shoes and was unavailable Graves, who is one of the for comment. Finally longest-serving Carlton Director Kristen Bowditch members of the 6 actors in said that the standard of
1

rehearsals had exceeded her expectations. "Everyone has made the transition from Shakespeare to Orton unbelievably well", she said. "Although we do get the odd 'hey nonny nonny' by accident. It's quite funny, really". I came away from that rehearsal looking forward to the performance with keen anticipation, although I do still have one question: where was the Butler? Joe Orton's What The Butler Saw is on at the Colour House Theatre as part of the Abbeyfest each evening between 17th and 21st July (except 20th) at 8pm. Tickets are priced at 7 and 5, and are available from the box office (020 8542 6644)

The Carlton Chronicle 18 July 2001

EDITORIAL
Welcome to the first edition of the Carlton Chronicle, which, over the next 12 months, will bring you all the news, gossip, fun and games from Carlton. The intention is to make it a vehicle for communication for everyone, and it depends as much on your input as mine, so if you want to see anything particular in your newsletter, do let me know otherwise I shall carry on in my own merry way! I hope that this first edition will give you a taste of what is to come (hang onto your hats - I've hardly started yet!) I hope that we've all managed to recover from the frenticism of Macbeth, especially since the cast of What The Butler Saw are now gearing themselves up for yet another box-office smash. They have been working extremely hard over the last 6 weeks - please support them at The Colour House this week. Georgina is also preparing for her forthcoming production of Our Town - details of auditions can be found on this page. Outgoing Chairman Pippa spoke at the AGM of the growth of the Carlton, and the continued success of our productions. The new committee hopes to continue the good work of the outgoing members, and with your help and enthusiasm, we can make 2001 another great season! Enjoy the Carlton Chronicle, and see you at the Colour House!

Aspiring Yankees take note - your opportunity to explore the New World is upon us! Georgina Gorham will be directing Our Town by Thornton Wilder at the Studio Theatre at the end of October. Set in a small town in New England in 1901, the play covers 12 years in the life of the community and explores aspects of daily life, love, marriage and death. There are no props or scenery, and action is imagined and mimed it should prove to be enormously enjoyable and satisfying. If you want to be involved, Georgina has organised the following: 23 July - play reading 26 July dialect workshop 30 July and 2 Aug auditions Georgina is at pains to stress that you do not have to attend both audition dates, and if

OUR TOWN?

The Carlton Chronicle 18 July 2001

you have problems making either date, please give her a call on 020 8542 1414. There are plenty of parts available, so do come along to the Community Centre and get involved!

determined to Keep the Faith he went down in a Blaze of Glory. Another stood up keen to take the mantle; employing vehicular assistance from a Chrysler as big as a whale he cruised to greatness. Spurred on by their success, two of the female ninjas leapt up with the battle cry, We're gonna live for ever and disappeared into the fray, but were eventually rescued by the band of brothers who told a moving folktale about jealousy, betrayal and murder in the green, green grass of home. As the battle drew to a close and thinking she had escaped the final assault, Crouching Panda started to head for home, but it was not to be. She was betrayed by the man she had usurped as Head Director Cheese, her tortured screams cut through the deceptively tranquil Morden night, her compatriots gathered up the spoils of battle (50 quid) and the screams became this haunting refrain I'm a Barbie girl in the Barbie world Life in plastic, it's fantastic You can brush my hair, undress me everywhere Imagination, life is your creation For those who think Ive been playing too many computer games here is a list of singers and songs: Jeff and Lucy: Beauty and the Beast (Jeffs joke on Ian rather backfired) Carl: Blaze of Glory Jeff/James/Carl/Ian/Matt/Richard: Delilah Matt: Love Shack Lucy, Chloe: Fame

Court And Social

Actors Show Hidden Talents! On 6 July, a group of intrepid Carlton-ites invaded the Happy Gourmet Chinese Restaurant and held a karaoke for the purpose of raising a little extra money. (What a frightening thought - Ed). The story of what happened next is probably best lowered into the shallow grave of history and covered over with quicklime, but in the public interest, Kristen Bowditch (who is not entirely blameless in this sordid episode) takes up the tale:
In the land of the setting sun, the noble band of samurai warriors stood proud, ready to face their destiny. Only by overcoming their fear and mastering the ancient art of Karaoke could they hope to reach their goal, two extra rehearsals of their Noh masterpiece, What the Butler Saw. All around them women and children screeched as the massacre of perfectly good (perfectly good? Barbie Girl? I think not - Ed) chart hits raged. One alone stood up and surged forward, Never Ever would he let All Saints rule, he grasped his Katana of Concord (+3), Living on a Prayer and

The Carlton Chronicle 18 July 2001

Sarah: Dancing Queen Richard, Jane Lewis: Summer Lovin' Kristen: Barbie Girl Apologies if I have left anyone off I dont remember anything past Aqua. Thanks everyone (including those who contributed remotely) for making this evening such a success!

BUTLER HOLDS PERFORMANCE ROMP

POSTSEX

The What The Butler Saw AfterShow party will be held at Jeff and Cindy's after the show (duh! When else?!) on Saturday 21 July. Very convenient, since it's within walking distance of the Colour House Theatre. Please bring the usual fortifying beverages and nibbles.

The Carlton Chronicle 18 July 2001

BUSINESS NEWS
Treasurer Warns of Imminent Demand for Subscriptions
Wall Street: Carl Whiteside, the only member to be re-elected to the Carlton Board, today warned that members' and shareholders' subscriptions were now due. "In order for Carlton to remain afloat, we have to ensure this regular annual injection of cash", he said. Despite recent fluctuations in the UK interest rate, and the uncertainty of the Dow Jones, Carlton has managed to keep its subscription charges steady at 30 for Full Members and 15 for Associates. A spokesman for the Bank of England said today that he wished all businesses operated such stringent accounting policies. Carl Whiteside also reminded members of the mandatory performance fees that fall due at the first rehearsal of each production. With consumer confidence running high, shares in Carlton rose slightly today to close at 135.2p.

Dear Charlie
Introducing our Agony Uncle, Charlie. If you have any questions or problems, Charlie can help. Charlie regrets that he cannot answer letters personally.
Dear Charlie, Not so long ago, I was the most important person in the Carlton. Everyone called me Your Highness, Sire, My Lord and Worthy Thane, and bowed and scraped before me. Then suddenly I was forgotten, and nobody even notices me any more. I'm still the same person, still handsome, hugely talented and funny. What can I do?

Dear Loser, It sounds to me like you blew it. You managed to fool all of the people all of the time, but eventually they saw through you - a bit like my ghost. I have no sympathy.
CLASSIFIED AND PERSONAL

For sale: immense talent. One careful owner, hardly used. Apply J Derbyshire.

The Carlton Chronicle 18 July 2001 So Just Who The Hell Is? I guess it's about time we introduced your new committee. Remember, you are responsible for these people Chairman - Jeff Graves Jeff has been a member of the Carlton for 4 years, and having now been on the committee for 2 years, he has finally risen to the dizzy heights of Chairman, an appointment he views as a great honour, and one which he will not take lightly. Jeff is looking forward to building on the excellent work of last year's committee, but will have his work cut out keeping his colleagues in order, and the meetings short. Vice Chairman - Georgina Gorham Georgina is a particularly popular member of the committee, kind, caring, considerate, enormously talented, both on and off-stage. She possesses exquisite taste and a quite uncanny knack for spotting new talent. She will be directing the forthcoming production of Our Town in October. (Have I got the part, George?) Secretary - Cindy Graves The very person needed to keep the Chairman in order, Cindy joined the Carlton about 3 years ago. Since then, she has built up a considerable reputation as a capable Stage Manager, and her election to the post of Secretary does at least mean that we can trust the veracity of the Minutes. Treasurer - Carl Whiteside Carl enjoyed the power of money so much he wanted to be Treasurer for a second year running. Members can go to bed at night safe in the knowledge that Carl will be burning the midnight oil to make those accounts balance. Of course it does also mean that we all have to be nice to him if we want a budget for each play Stage Management Rep - Simon Harris Simon has extensive experience of stage management, having sat through the highs and the lows of many a Carlton production. After all, he always knows that if it's really bad, he can turn the sound up and pretend it's not happening. Now, after many years resisting the pressure from his colleagues, he has at last agreed to share his infinite range of unusual kitchen noises with the rest of the committee, a concession for which we are eternally grateful. Publicity and Press Relations - Mike Tierney What can one say about Mike? Talented mimic, hilarious comic, chef extraordinaire (Delia rings him up for advice), the ultimate handyman, committed conservationist - this man's abilities know no bounds. And now he adds PR to his credentials. What a guy! Fundraising and Social Secretary - Val Foskett The very person your mother always warned you to stay away from at parties, Val has, by some fluke, been elected Social Secretary, which means that alcohol consumption in the Wimbledon area will increase ten-fold, and there will be questions in Parliament. On the other hand, if anybody can wangle your hardearned cash out of you, it's Val and her winning smile. Hang on, you don't think she's in league with Carl, do you? Newsletter Editor - Sue Lovelace Probably the biggest mistake of all, Sue's election to this post just demonstrates the vagaries of the British electoral system (could be worse, we could be in the USA). Sue hasn't much acting experience, but her ability to talk complete rubbish more than makes up for this deficiency, and ensures that if nothing else, this newsletter will always be value for money. After all, you get what you pay for

The Carlton Chronicle 18 July 2001

Oh 'Eck, Not Her Again

Well, I guess that's it for this first edition of the Carlton Chronicle. I thought I'd let you all in gently with a short (ish) one - the next one will be bigger, better and far more libellous. And as the Queen's English once more gets swallowed up in the deep throat of amateur theatre, I leave you with the immortal words of the great Mr Ian Hislop, "If everything you read in this paper isn't true, then I'm a banana".

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Sue Lovelace