What Makes A Powerful Woman?

An Exploration of Eight Qualities Underneath the Power When you hear the words powerful woman, what picture comes to mind? Do you envision a woman who you feel has attained success, or a woman who has taken on a battle of some sort and has won? Is it a thought of a woman you feel is in a powerful job position? Do you picture a woman who appears extremely popular? While all of these things can invoke images of power, what youre seeing is just the end result. Youre not seeing the eight simple underlying traits these women possess to get them to the point of being deemed powerful. There are many women in the world who have not lassoed what you and I see as success, or who havent had the opportunity to take on a big battle in their lives. Still, they are powerful. There are numbers of women out there in normal, supportive day-to-day jobs. Theyre powerful, too. There are millions of women who dont exude popularity. Yet those women can be just as powerful as the ones you picture when you hear the words, powerful woman. Powerful women have eight individual qualities that serve as the central core of their lives. They live and breathe the first seven of these, which keep them true to themselves and help them achieve the eighth trait easily. When a woman possesses and practices these qualities on a daily basis, she becomes the essence of a true, powerful woman, no matter what her worldly picture may look like to others. 1) Gives It All Shes Got a powerful woman will give all she can give to any task at hand, without question, and without complaint. Example: A woman salesclerk who normally spends her time at work out on the floor interacting with store customers is asked by her manager to do a task she doesnt like. When she goes into work one day, shes asked to organize a stock room, which entails moving boxes, unpacking those boxes, and placing inventory in an organized fashion on shelves. Even though its a job she doesnt like, she takes on the task without complaint to her manager or others, and she diligently follows through to completion on the project.

2) Never Gives Up a powerful woman never gives up. Period. She goes after what she wants in life and she doesnt quit, no matter how difficult the going may get. Example: A woman decided at a young age she wanted to be an artist, and make her living from her creative talents. Many obstacles are placed in her way. She has had to take other jobs just to keep food on the table. Sometimes shes so tired she just wants to give upbut she doesnt. She keeps going, day after day, month after month, and year after year. She doesnt allow negative influences. She doesnt listen to those who put her dream down. She doesnt allow others to pull her away from her ultimate goal. And she doesnt know the meaning of the words I cant. Plain and simpleshe never gives up on her true dream. Ever. 3) Speaks Her Mind a powerful woman is not afraid to speak her mind. Example: A woman is involved in a group discussion about how to fix a problem. Others who are more qualified are very generous with their suggestions, however this woman feels she has a good idea

about how to fix the problem much more quickly and easily. Though its hard for her to get a word in, and even though shes in a room with seasoned professionals, she opens her mouth and shares her idea with a conviction and belief that its the right action to take. She doesnt worry about what others will think about what she says. She isnt concerned that some may criticize her for her thoughts. She isnt attached to their acceptance of her idea. She speaks her mind with a calm confidence only a powerful woman could exude. 4) Respects Herself and Others a powerful woman is respectful in all situations. Example: A married woman is asked by her co-workers to go to a bar after work. She doesnt feel comfortable in a bar environment, plus she knows her husband would be unhappy, as he looks forward to their evenings at home. Rather than going along with the crowd for fear she might not be accepted, she respects herself by declining the invitation. She does so without fear as a powerful woman always knows that acceptance must come from within first and foremost. In addition, she respects the choices of the others who go to the bar, despite the fact she might not agree or approve. And she doesnt treat them any differently because of their choices. 5) Stands Up For What She Believes In a powerful woman is confident in supporting her beliefs, no matter what the consequences. Example: A woman believes that all people regardless of race, color, creed, sex, etc should be treated equally. In a company board meeting, a discussion ensues about hiring a particular applicant who happens to be a mother of two versus hiring another applicant who happens to have no children. Despite the fact the mother of two is clearly more qualified, several of the board members express a desire to hire the other applicant due to her childless lifestyle. The powerful woman expresses what she believes which is that the applicant with children is clearly more qualified and should be the one hired for the position. The powerful woman states it is unfair to discriminate against the mother of two in this manner. When the others try to sway her belief on the issue, she doesnt back down. She clearly states her belief again, and refuses to adopt a way of thinking and behavior which isnt in line with her core beliefs. 6) Inspires Herself And Others the ability to inspire naturally resides within the powerful woman. Example: A woman has been criticized recently, and the critical statements are running through her mind. Rather than accept the critical comments from others, she speaks to herself about her gifts, talents and positive traits. Just as she would tell someone else who came to her with the same issues, she tells herself to hang in there, that things will get better. She doesnt allow the negativity directed toward her by others to consume her life or get her down. Instead she responds to the negativity by focusing on the positives and by offering herself hope for the future.

7) Shares Her Power Willingly a powerful woman willingly shares her gifts, talents, skills and knowledge with others. Example: A woman has developed a unique recipe that proves to be a hit at many of the social events she attends. She enjoys the compliments, and loves the fact others look forward to the dish shes serving. It makes her feel good. She basks in the glow of her success in pleasing others with her recipe. At her next event, she is asked for the ingredients that make this recipe so special. The woman has a choice to share, or to keep the secret recipe to herself, so that her dish will continue to be the envy of others. The powerful

woman will share, and do so gladly, because she is confident of the gifts within her that give her the ability to constantly create new dishes others will enjoy. 8) Makes A Difference In The Lives Of Others this quality is at the core of every powerful womans being. It is something that, deep down, every woman wants to achieve on a daily basis. It is a quality created by behaving according to the previous traits, for when a woman lives by the first seven, she will easily and effortlessly become the woman who makes a difference in the lives of others. Example: A businesswoman comes across a homeless girl on the street. The girls appearance is disheveled. Her clothes are torn; her hair is a knotted mess. The girl is smoking a cigarette, and looking down at the ground. The businesswoman glances at her watch, and realizes shes late for work. Yet she turns and walks up to the girl. She hands the girl $20 to cover some of her needs. She offers inspiration and words of encouragement when she tells the girl that she doesnt have to accept this life she has somehow ended up in the middle of, and how, with a little effort, she can become anyone she wants to be, and do anything she wants to do. One year later, the businesswoman receives a thank-you card in the mail. In the card is a $20 bill and a business card from the owner of a new boutiquecoincidentally located on the same corner where shed stopped and spoken to the destitute girl. The businesswoman smiles inside, knowing shed taken the right actions to make a difference in the life of someone else. And that, for a powerful woman, is what makes the journey worthwhile. As you can see, it doesnt matter what a womans role in life is thats just the outer picture the world sees. Its the possession and application on a daily basis of these qualities and traits that make a woman no matter who she is or what she does for a living truly one powerful chick. J

Jai Johnson is the artist and designer behind 1PowerfulChick.Com, a boutique offering a line of gifts designed to celebrate the extraordinary power of women who make a difference through all walks of life. Visit the website at: http://www.1PowerfulChick.Com
(ArticlesBase SC #567552)

Liked this article? Click here to publish it on your website or blog, it's free and easy!
Read more: http://www.articlesbase.com/motivational-articles/what-makes-a-powerful-woman567552.html#ixzz19EJtmhy9 Under Creative Commons License: Attribution

Sunday 26-Dec-10 Search:

Submit

Secrets of Happiness Powerful Women Foundation Home About Us Powerful Books and DVD's Powerful Links Inspiring Quotes The Secrets of Happiness Forget about money. Don't fret about youth. Acting happy is likely to make you happy.

There are happy people. Researchers at the National Institute on Aging found that wellbeing is strongly influenced by enduring characteristics of the individual. In a 10-year study, they found that, regardless of whether their marital status, job, or residence had changed, people with a happy disposition in 1973 were still happy in 1983. There's good news in these findings: Given the right disposition, in the face of difficulty, people can still find renewed happiness. What makes for a happy disposition? Who are these people who stay basically up despite life's downs? There are four important traits of happy people: I: Self-esteem: Happy People Like Themselves

Please help keep this community web site alive. Contributions are much appreciated!

During the 1980s, no topic in psychology was more researched than the self. Many reports showed the dividends of high self-esteem--in some University of Michigan studies of wellbeing in America, the best predictor of general life satisfaction was not satisfaction with family life, friendships, or income, but satisfaction with self. People who like and accept themselves feel good about life in general. This will come as no surprise to anyone attuned to the pop psychology of our age. Self-help books exhort us to respect ourselves, to dwell on our good points, to be positive. Cut the self-pity. Stop the negative talk. To discover love, first love yourself. We've heard the message: In a 1989 Gallup poll, 85 percent of Americans rated "having a good self-image or self-respect" as very important; 0 percent rated it unimportant. Actually, most of us have a good reputation with ourselves. In studies of self-esteem, even low-scoring people respond in the mid-range of scores. (A "low" self-esteem person

responds to statements such as "I have good ideas" with a qualifying adjective such as "somewhat" or "sometimes.") Moreover, one of the most provocative yet firmly established conclusions of social psychology concerns the potency of "self-serving bias." People accept more responsibility for good deeds than for bad, for successes than for failures. The question "What have I done to deserve this?" is one we ask of our troubles, not our successes--those we assume we deserve. On nearly any subjective or socially desirable dimension, most people actually see themselves as better than average. We also remember and justify our past actions in selfenhancing ways, are quicker to believe more flattering descriptions of ourselves than unflattering ones, and overestimate the extent to which others support our opinions and share our foibles. For most of us, these "positive illusions" protect against anxiety and depression. All of us at some time do feel inferior--especially when comparing ourselves with those who are a step or two higher on the ladder of status, looks, or income. The deeper and more frequently we have such feelings, the more unhappy we are. Therefore, we function better with modest self-enhancing illusions. A healthy self-esteem, then, is both positive and realistic. Because it is based on the genuine achievement of realistic ideals, and on feeling accepted for what one is, such selfesteem provides a strong foundation for enduring joy. II: Optimism: Happy People Are Hope-Filled Those who agree that "with enough faith, you can do almost anything" and that "when I undertake something new, I expect to succeed" may be a bit bubble-headed. But, for seeing the glass of life as half-full rather than half-empty, they are usually happier. Optimists are also healthier. Several studies reveal that a pessimistic style of explaining bad events--saying, "It's my fault, it's going to last, and it's going to undermine everything"-makes us more vulnerable to illness. Harvard graduates who were most pessimistic when interviewed in 1946 were least healthy when restudied in 1980. Virginia Tech students who reacted to bad events pessimistically suffered more colds, sore throats, and flu a year later. In general, optimistic people are less bothered by various illnesses and recover better from cancer and surgery. Optimists also enjoy greater success. Rather than see setbacks as signs of their incompetence, they view them as flukes or as suggesting the need for a new approach. A person who confronts life with an attitude that often says "Yes!" to people and possibilities lives with far more joy and venturesomeness than do habitual naysayers. Yet in affirming the great truth about optimism, let us also remember a complementary truth about the perils of unrealism. Unrealistic optimists may fail to take sensible precautions. And consider the shame and dejection that accompanies shattered expectations. If you believe the inspirational messages of positive thinkers, then whose fault is it if you don't march upward from highs to higher highs? What do we conclude when our marriages turn out to be less than we romanticized, when we are less successful than we dreamed? At such times, we have only ourselves to blame. When the dream collapses, the biggest

dreamers often fall the hardest. Limitless optimism breeds endless frustrations. The recipe for well-being, then, requires neither positive nor negative thinking alone, but a mix of ample optimism to provide hope, a dash of pessimism to prevent complacency, and enough realism to discriminate those things we can control from those we cannot. III: Extroversion: Happy People Are Outgoing In study after study, extroverts--social, outgoing people--report greater happiness and satisfaction with life. The explanation seems partly temperamental. "Extroverts are simply more cheerful and high-spirited," report National Institute of Aging researchers Paul Costa and Robert McCrae. Self-assured people who walk into a room full of strangers and warmly introduce themselves may also be more accepting of themselves. Liking themselves, they are confident that others will like them, too. Such attitudes tend also to be self-fulfilling, leading extroverts to experience more positive events. When University of Illinois researchers Ed Diener and Keith Magnus studied students at the undergraduate level and then again four years later as alumni, they found that life had treated extroverts more kindly. Compared to introverts, extroverts were more likely to have gotten married, found good jobs, and made new, close friends. Extroverted people are more involved with others. They have a larger circle of friends and they more often engage in rewarding social activities. They experience more affection and enjoy greater social support--an important wellspring of well-being. IV: Personal Control: Happy People Believe They Choose Their Destinies Summarizing the University of Michigan's nationwide surveys, researcher Angus Campbell commented that "having a strong sense of controlling one's life is a more dependable predictor of positive feelings of well-being than any of the objective conditions of life we have considered." And the 15 percent of Americans who feel in control of their lives and feel satisfied with themselves have "extraordinarily positive feelings of happiness." Consider your own sense of personal control. Would you agree with the statement that "I don't have enough control over the direction my life is taking" or that "What happens to me is my own doing"? That "The world is run by a few powerful people" or that "The average person can influence government decisions"? Those whose responses to such statements reveal an "internal locus of control" typically achieve more in school, cope better with stress, and live more happily. Increasing people's control can noticeably improve their health and morale as well. One study by Yale psychologist Judith Rodin encouraged nursing-home patients to exert more control--to make choices about their environment and to influence policy. As a result, 93 percent became more alert, active, and happy. Similar results have been observed after allowing prisoners to move chairs and control the lights and TV, and after enabling workers to participate in decision making. Happy, too, are those who gain the sense of control that comes with effective management of one's time. Unoccupied time, especially for out-of-work people who aren't able to plan and fill their time, is unsatisfying. Sleeping late, hanging out, and watching TV leave an empty feeling. For happy people, time is "filled and planned; they are punctual and efficient," says

Oxford University psychologist Michael Argyle. "For unhappy people, time is unfilled, open, and uncommitted; they postpone things and are inefficient." Establishing pre-set deadlines for oneself--and then meeting them--can lead to the delicious, confident feeling of personal control. Finally: How To Be Happy It's easily enough said that happiness comes with having positive self-esteem, feeling in control of our lives, and having optimistic, outgoing dispositions, but how can we strengthen such traits? If we wish we were happier, can we somehow become more positive, innerdirected, confident, and extroverted? Just how malleable are we? Well-meaning advice to "be more outgoing" or to "have a more cheerful outlook" can burden us with the responsibility to choose our basic temperament. More than such advice-givers realize, we bring our basic dispositions with us into the world. More and more studies show that our basic personality traits endure, especially after childhood. While developmental psychologists are sometimes surprised by how often troubled, unhappy children mature into competent, successful adults, there is nonetheless an underlying consistency to personality. After the end of the teen years, traits such as outgoingness, emotional stability, openness, agreeableness, and conscientiousness seem to persist throughout adulthood. But it's also true that we have the power to affect our own destinies, for we are the creators as well as the creatures of our social worlds. We may be the products of our past, but we are also the architects of our future. Personality isn't programmed like eye color. The predispositions we bring with us into the world leave room for nurture's influence, and our own efforts as well. What we do today shapes our world and ourselves tomorrow. If social psychologists have proven anything during the last 30 years, they have proven that the actions we take leave a residue inside us. Every time we act, we amplify the underlying idea or tendency behind it. Most people presume the reverse: that our traits and attitudes affect our behavior. While this is true to a certain extent (though less so than commonly supposed), it is also true that our traits and attitudes follow our behavior. We are as likely to act ourselves into a new way of thinking as to think ourselves into a new way of acting. There is a practical moral here for us all. Do we wish to change ourselves in some important way? Perhaps boost our self-esteem? Become more optimistic and socially assertive? Well, a potent strategy is to get up and start doing that very thing. Don't worry that you don't feel like it. Fake it. Pretend self-esteem. Feign optimism. Simulate outgoingness. In experiments, people have been asked to write essays or present themselves to an interviewer in either self-enhancing or selfdeprecating ways. Those who act as if they are exceptionally intelligent, caring, and sensitive people later express higher self-esteem when privately describing themselves to a different researcher. This saying-becomes-believing effect is harnessed by therapy techniques (such as behavior therapy, rational-emotive therapy, and cognitive therapy), each of which prods the clients into practicing more positive talk and behavior. Yes, telling people to act or talk positively sounds like telling people to be phony. But, as

usually happens when we step into some new role--perhaps our first days "playing" parent, salesperson, or teacher--an amazing thing happens: The phoniness gradually subsides. We notice that our uncomfortable sense of being a parent, for instance, no longer feels forced. The new role--and the new behaviors and accompanying attitudes--have begun to fit us as comfortably as an old pair of blue jeans. The moral: Going through the motions can trigger the emotions. Surely you've noticed. You're in a testy mood, but when the phone rings you feign cheer while talking to a friend. Strangely, after hanging up, you no longer feel so grumpy. Such is the value of social occasions--they impel us to behave as if we were happy, which in fact helps free us from our unhappiness. Granted, we can't expect ourselves to become more upbeat and socially confident overnight. But rather than limply resign ourselves to our current traits and emotions, we can stretch ourselves, step by step. Rather than waiting until we feel like making those calls or reaching out to that person, we can begin. If we are too anxious, modest, or indifferent, we can pretend, trusting that before long the pretense will diminish as our actions ignite a spark inside--the spark that will lead to happiness. Parts of this article were excerpted from The Pursuit of Happiness: Who Is Happy--and Why, by David G. Myers, Ph.D., copyright C) 1992 by William Morrow and Company Inc. Last Updated: 08/30/2004 Copyright 1991-2007 Sussex Publishers. All rights reserved.

Back to Home Page