NICE GUYS FINISH LAST

By: Garrett Hols Its amazing that assholes can get girls. Actually, now that I think of it, its not that amazing. They are assholes at heart, but to meet girls they lavish their undying love. ITS A CHARADE. They act nice, friendly, and they listen until they get into what theyre after. Their prey thinks they are in love with them, however when they realize what assholes their predators really are, they pretend like the asshole is really nice inside. The girl tries to change the asshole into a nice guy, but assholes will always be assholes. She gets upset and goes to the nice guy to complain about the asshole. But she claims to love the asshole now this is where the theory begins. She doesnt want to look like she is easy so she wont dump the asshole right away, instead she will stay with the asshole. Girls are idiots. They dont realize that the nice guy has been there all along. He never had to pretend to be a good guy to get girls because he is naturally like that. However, girls dont see it for some reason or another. They look at the nice guy as a friend, a trusted companion to whom they can tell their sad story to about their asshole boyfriend. But the nice guy isnt THAT nave. He was trying to score with the girl he listens to all along. The problem is that since he is a nice guy he keeps listening. Since girls get attached to things that pay attention to them, they think of the nice guy as a friend. A FRIEND. They dont say, Oh hes hot or I want to have his children about the nice guy, they just want the emotional support. When they get the emotional support from the nice guy, they dont need it from the asshole. The nice guy gets the shit end of the stick while the asshole gets all the action. I am starting to wonder if being a nice guy is really the route to take to get action I have been down this path for all of my post-pubescent life and it has gotten me NOWHERE at least not in the women department. Perhaps another reason why girls fall for the asshole is because assholes ignore the girl they are with. The women wonder, Why isnt he paying

attention to me? so they explore why. They poke and prod and get closer to the asshole. They start to get easier with each attempt to get closer. The asshole finally says, Ive let this beauty dangle long enough, time to boat this bass. It is then he puts on his charade and the girl feels like she has won him even thought all she has won is an asshole. Once you have gone down the path as a nice guy or a listener you cant turn back. The girl will always go after the assholes because there are always nice guys there to listen. Once you realize that you are a listener you cant do anything about it just pack up and close shop. There is no way you will get into her pants ever. There is and never will be a situation where the nice guy will get the girl he has a crush on. It just doesnt work like that. The girl wont come to her senses and realize what an asshole her boyfriend is like in the movies instead she will just go after another asshole, and unless you stop being a nice guy, she will never go after you. Women complain that there are no nice guys in the world. Right. They are obviously not looking hard enough because there are nice guys EVERYWHERE!!!! Girls arent looking for nice guys they say they are but theyre not. They are looking for the perfect asshole, but there is NO SUCH THING as the perfect asshole. All in all, the nice guy gets the shaft. To all the girls out there with boyfriends that dont treat you with respect, that dont listen to you, and that dont care about you I say this; look next to you. The guy that has been standing next to you the whole time is the guy you have been looking for. He is what you want your asshole to be like. He knows more about you than you know about yourself because he has listened to it all.

Nice Guys
Why Nice Guys Finish Last

What You Need To Know Women like men who can defend them. Nice guys tend to be too predictable; women like spontaneity. A man needs to present himself as a challenge to attract women.

"No woman wants to deal with a guy with a martyr complex. It was fitting for Joan of Arc, not the man youre dating." Youve heard the lament before: Women complain about men behaving like douchebags, yet they go back time and time again to the guy who doesnt shower them with roses or worship the ground they walk on. Meanwhile, youre trying your best to be Mr. Nice Guy and you end up in the friend category. So what gives? Why do nice guys finish last? Nice guys dont seem like good protectors Maybe it goes back to the days of our cave-dwelling ancestors, but historically, men have always protected women. Nice guys dont seem like they can defend themselves, much less a woman. There might not be giant woolly mammoths trying to take us out, but there are still burglars and bad guys, and women want to feel like the guy theyre with can take care of them. Nice guys try too hard Nice guys put women on a pedestal, acting as if shes some sort of goddess. They go overboard with their affection. They come on too strong, too quick. They put aside their own needs for her. Women are human, too, and we dont want to be put on a pedestal thats easy to fall off of. Nice guys are predictable Many people lead pretty predictable lives. They get married, have two to work, retire. Women dont want to add to that by dating a guy who to be so predictable they know his every move. Everyone likes excitement and spontaneity. Women want to know that theyre going fun with the guy theyre with, not have a snooze fest.

kids, go is going a little to have

Nice guys seem like doormats Nice guys almost never speak up when something irks them and rarely state what they want or need for fear that conflict will result in losing their friend or girlfriend. Letting people walk all over you without setting up any boundaries signals that you probably dont have a backbone. No spine equals no respect. Its hard to respect a guy who lets other people treat him poorly. Plus, if youre too afraid to rock the boat, it signals that you probably wont stand up for her either. And that is not attractive to any woman. Nice guys expect niceness Nice guys expect that because they are so super-sweet that people should respond to them in kind. But the problem is they allow their own emotions and feelings to take a back seat, for the sake of other people, and when other people dont reciprocate, they play the part of the victim. No woman wants to deal with a guy with a martyr complex. It was fitting for Joan of Arc, not the man youre dating. Being a nice guy hardly bodes well for being good in bed. Women enjoy being with a man who can take control and deliver the goods." Nice guys seem fake Nice guys can come across as being too nice. Even Nelson Mandela had an edge. No one can be that saccharine sweet all the time unless theyre a saint. If youre too nice to everyone who crosses your path, it comes across as fake, rather than genuine, niceness. You cant like everyone or be happy in every situation, so if you find yourself putting on a perpetual happy face it might be time to re-examine your real feelings and let them show. It demonstrates that youre a real person with actual feelings and not just interested in putting on an act. Nice guys are not a challenge Nice guys make it easy to dress in sweats and eat potato chips on the couch. You get the feeling theyll never leave so you dont bother to look good because you dont think it will even matter. Women want to be with someone who is going to present a challenge; it keeps the relationship on its toes. Challenge our ideas, debate us, makes us work. It makes the relationship more interesting.

Nice guys seem insecure Nice guys come across as so anxious to be liked and accepted that you never know if they actually like you or just want to be with you because you actually paid attention to them. On the other hand, to women looking for a quick ego fix or just a free drink, nice guys read sucker." Nice guys are easy to take advantage of and score freebies from. You teach people how to treat you, so if you act insecure and needy, people (and that includes women) will treat you as such. Insecurity is a major turnoff. Nice guys dont seem like good lays Being a nice guy hardly bodes well for being good in bed. Women enjoy being with a man who can take control and deliver the goods. Being soft, sweet and gentle all the time isnt the sexiest vibe. A woman wants to know that a guy is going to ravish her, not treat her like a piece of china in bed. Nice guys dont behave like men Nice guys think that by always asking her for her opinion theyre being sensitive, but many times theyre just being annoying. Women want a guy who can take charge and choose the restaurant, create a plan and make a decision. Always asking her to make a decision is irritating and makes you seem like you dont have a pair of balls. The bottom line? You dont have to be an arrogant prick to land a hot babe, but you do have to have a backbone. You have to like yourself, feel confident and be able to stand up for yourself. Most women dont really want a true bad boy, unless theyre mentally unstable. We just want a guy we can respect and who will respect us without kissing our ass 24/7. Women love a guy who treats them well, but we also love men with guts and the ability to speak up for themselves. Women want to feel protected and know that the guy theyre with will have their back, no matter what. Saying that women dont like you because youre a nice guy is a cop-out. Chances are its not simply because youre nice; its because youre behaving like a doormat.

Why "Nice Guys" are often such LOSERS

You hear it all the time: "He was such a NICE Guy, and she's such a Heartless Bitch for dumping him." I get letters from self-professed Nice Guys, complaining that women must WANT to be treated like shit, because THEY, the "Nice Guy" have failed repeatedly in relationships. This is akin to the false logic that "Whales are mammals. Whales live in the sea. Therefore, all mammals live in the sea." If you have one bad relationship after another, the only common denominator is YOU. Think about it. What's wrong with Nice Guys? The biggest problem is that most Nice Guys (tm) are hideously insecure. They are so anxious to be liked and loved that they do things for other people to gain acceptance and attention, rather than for the simply pleasure of giving. You never know if a Nice Guy really likes you for who you are, or if he has glommed onto you out of desperation because you actually paid some kind of attention to him. Nice Guys exude insecurity -- a big red target for the predators of the world. There are women out there who are "users" -- just looking for a sucker to take advantage of. Users home-in on "Nice Guys", stroke their egos, take them for a ride, add a notch to their belts, and move on. It's no wonder so many Nice Guys complain about women being horrible, when the so often the kind of woman that gets attracted to them is the lowest form of life... Self-confident, caring, decent-hearted women find "Nice Guys" to be too clingy, self-abasing, and insecure. Nice Guys go overboard. They bring roses to a "lets get together for coffee" date. They try to buy her affections with presents and fancy things. They think they know about romance, but their timing is all wrong, and they either come-on too strong, too hard and too fast, OR, they are so shy and unassertive, that they hang around pretending to be "friends", in the hope

that somehow, someway, they will get the courage up to ask her out for a "date". They are so desperate to please that they put aside their own needs, and place the object of their desire on a pedestal. Instead of appreciating her, they worship her. We are only human, and pedestals are narrow, confining places to be -- not to mention the fact that we tend to fall off of them. They cling to her, and want to be "one" with her for fear that if she is out of sight; she may disappear or become attracted to someone else. A Nice Guy often has trouble with emotional intimacy, because he believes that if she learns about the REAL person inside, she will no longer love him. Nice Guys are always asking HER to make the decisions. They think it's being equitable, but it puts an unfair burden of responsibility on her, and gives him the opportunity to blame her if the decision was an unwise one. Nice Guys rarely speak up when something bothers them, and rarely state clearly what it is they want, need and expect. They fear that any kind of conflict might spell the end of the relationship. Instead of comprimising and negotiating, they repeatedly "give in". When she doesn't appreciate their sacrifice, they will complain that, "Everything I did, I did for her.", as if this somehow elevates them to the status of martyrs. A woman doesn't want a martyr. She wants an equal, caring, adult partner. Nice Guys think that they will never meet anyone as special as she is. They use their adoration as a foundation for claiming that "no one will ever love her as much as I do." Instead of being a profound statement of their devotion, this is a subtle, but nasty insult. It is akin to saying to her: "You are a difficult person, and only *I* can ever truly love you, so be thankful I'm here." The nice guy -needs- to believe that he is the best person for the object of his desires, because otherwise his insecurities will overrun him with jealousies and fear. The truth of the matter is that there are many people

out there who can be a good match for her. We rarely stop loving people we truly care about. Even if we no longer continue the relationship, the feelings will continue... But love isn't mutually exclusive. We can (and do) love many people in our lives, and romantic love is really no different. Though he may love her immensely, there will likely be other people who have loved her just as much in her past, and will love her just as much in the future. The irony of it all is: "Who would want to go out with someone who was inherintly unlovable anyways?" More than loving the woman in his life, a Nice Guy NEEDS her. "She is my Life, my only source of happiness..." YECH! What kind of a burden is that to place on her? That SHE has to be responsible for YOUR happiness? Get a grip! Another mistake Nice Guys make is to go after "hard luck" cases. They deliberately pick women with neuroses, problems, and personality disorders, because Nice Guys are "helpers". A Nice Guy thinks that by "helping" this woman, it will make him a better, more lovable person. He thinks it will give him a sense of accomplishment, and that she will appreciate and love him more, for all his efforts and sacrifice. He is usually disappointed by the results. This ultimately boils down to the fact that Nice Guys don't like themselves. Is it any wonder women don't like them? In order to truly love someone else, you must first love yourself. Too often Nice Guys mistake obsession for "love". Get this Guys: INSECURITY ISN'T SEXY. IT'S A TURNOFF. You don't have to be an ego-inflated, arrogant jerk. You just have to LIKE yourself. You have to know what you want out of life, and go after it. Only then will you be attractive to the kind of woman with whom a long-term relationship is possible.

Ode to the Nice Guys

This rant was written for the Wharton Undergraduate Journal

This is a tribute to the nice guys. The nice guys that finish last, that never become more than friends, that endure hours of whining and bitching about what assholes guys are, while disproving the very point. This is dedicated to those guys who always provide a shoulder to lean on but restrain themselves to tentative hugs, those guys who hold open doors and give reassuring pats on the back and sit patiently outside the changing room at department stores. This is in honor of the guys that obligingly reiterate how cute/beautiful/smart/funny/sexy their female friends are at the appropriate moment, because they know most girls need that litany of support. This is in honor of the guys with open minds, with laid-back attitudes, with honest concern. This is in honor of the guys who respect a girls every facet, from her privacy to her theology to her clothing style. This is for the guys who escort their drunk, bewildered female friends back from parties and never take advantage once theyre at her door, for the guys who accompany girls to bars as buffers against the rest of the creepy male population, for the guys who know a girl is fishing for compliments but give them out anyway, for the guys who always play by the rules in a game where the rules favor cheaters, for the guys who are accredited as boyfriend material but somehow dont end up being boyfriends, for all the nice guys who are overlooked, underestimated, and unappreciated, for all the nice guys who are manipulated, misled, and unjustly abandoned, this is for you. This is for that time she left 40 urgent messages on your cell phone, and when you called her back, she spent three hours painstakingly dissecting two sentences her boyfriend said to her over dinner. And even though you thought her boyfriend was a chump and a jerk, you assured her that it was all ok and she shouldnt worry about it. This is for that time she interrupted the best killing spree youd ever orchestrated in GTA3 to rant about a rumor that romantically linked her and the guy she thinks is the most repulsive person in the world. And even though you thought it was immature and you had nothing against the guy, you paused the game for two hours and helped her concoct a counter-rumor to spread around the floor. This is also for that time she didnt

have a date, so after numerous vows that there was nothing serious between the two of you, she dragged you to a party where you knew nobody, the beer was awful, and she flirted shamelessly with you, justifying each fit of reckless teasing by announcing to everyone: oh, but were just friends! And even though you were invited purely as a symbolic warm body for her ego, you went anyways. Because youre nice like that. The nice guys dont often get credit where credit is due. And perhaps more disturbing, the nice guys dont seem to get laid as often as they should. And I wish I could logically explain this trend, but I cant. From what I have observed on campus and what I have learned from talking to friends at other schools and in the workplace, the only conclusion I can form is that many girls are just illogical, manipulative bitches. Many of them claim they just want to date a nice guy, but when presented with such a specimen, they say irrational, confusing things such as oh, hes too nice to date or he would be a good boyfriend but hes not for me or he already puts up with so much from me, I couldnt possibly ask him out! or the most frustrating of all: no, it would ruin our friendship. Yet, they continue to lament the lack of datable men in the world, and they expect their too-nice-to-date male friends to sympathize and apologize for the men that are jerks. Sorry, guys, girls like that are beyond my ability to fathom. I cant figure out why the connection breaks down between what they say (I want a nice guy!) and what they do (Im going to sleep with this complete ass now!). But one thing I can do, is say that the nice-guyfinishes-last phenomenon doesnt last forever. There are definitely many girls who grow out of that train of thought and realize they should be dating the nice guys, not taking them for granted. The tricky part is finding those girls, and even trickier, finding the ones that are single. So, until those girls are found, I propose a toast to all the nice guys. You know who you are, and I know youre sick of hearing yourself described as ubiquitously nice. But the truth of the matter is, the world needs your patience in the department store, your holding open of doors, your party escorting services, your propensity to be a sucker for a pretty smile. For all the crazy, inane, absurd things you tolerate, for all the situations where you are the faceless, nameless hero, my accolades, my acknowledgement, and my gratitude go out to you. You do have credibility in this society, and your well deserved vindication is coming. Fu-zu Jen, SEAS/WH, 2003

Ever Been Frustrated By Western Women? Then Welcome!

I'm NiceGuy. Why did I make this site, if I'm Nice? Because: Ameriskanks (mostly) Suck*. ("Ameriskanks" means "North American females" obviously.) And yes, they 're horrible beyond imagination. Don't shoot the messenger. It's actually a good thing for me to come out and say this- our biggest critics are our truest friends because they show us how to improve ourselves. In this case, I'm giving an entire gender the criticism it needs to improve itself.** Did you ever notice that only a woman can talk about the superiority of her own sex without getting booed or scolded? Did you ever notice there is no shortage of excuses and tolerance whenever sexist speech or behavior comes from a woman? And did you ever notice that any woman who claims to be concerned about "inequality" usually manages to studiously ignore (or angrily deny) the inequalities that favor her? These types of observations ought to raise a number of ugly questions about women, and yet these types of questions are seldom asked. Why? Finding ways to talk about those (and other) things is probably one reason you're here. If you're a first-time visitor, before you start going all mad at me and sending death threats and hate mail, you should start-off by reading: why I think U.S. women rank among the most sexist humans on the planet, the Top 10 Criticisms I've gotten so far... my self-introduction and last but not least, my explanation for why I started this site and why I've chosen exile from American gals. This page is about, essentially, why NiceGuy thinks Ameriskanks (mostly) Suck *. Such as: their extreme and gleeful sexism. Their accompanying denials of their sexism. Their head-games. Their double-standards and double-speak. Their massive and despicable hypocrisies. Their verbal abuse. Their thanklessness. Their narcissism. Their lies within lies within lies. Their never-ending, sanctimonious victimhood mentality. The bigotry they thinly-disguise as "humor". Their mouthy temper-tantrums. Their "I want everything whether I deserve it or not" attitude. Their unceasing complain-a-thons. Their demands to be continuously pampered and showered with money. The fact that they will spread their legs for a man who gives them enough jewelry, yet will deny their obvious whoring. Their convenient blindness to the fact that they scapegoat men and screw-over men constantly.

Their knee-jerk denials whenever it comes time to evaluate their own flaws in an honest fashion. How they'll complain of men failing to express their emotions while simultaneously ignoring male emotions with smarmy cries of "take it like a maaaayaaan!" The fact that they routinely behave outrageously unfairly towards men yet always demand that men treat them fairly... Did I miss anything? As for the Ameriskanks between the ages of 16 and 35, they occupy a special place in my heart. If you've ever met any, then you've probably come-away with the impression that they're (mostly) hopelessly spoiled, incurably psychotic, compulsively mendacious, irredeemably corrupt and intrinsically toxic human beings. That's why I moved-away from 'em: I get quite a bit of comfort from knowing I have distanced myself safely beyond the reach of their vile claws. And nowadays I simply view those trolls with a mixture of bemusement and contempt. Especially since quite a few of 'em seem to believe they're "oppressed" because they get whistled-at occasionally and the Barbie dolls are too curvy. (Pathetic, but true!) Because they're convinced they've been "oppressed" for millennia, they think they have the moral sanction to behave in a similarly awful fashion-- or even worse. And let's face it: no matter how "liberated" a woman claims to be, she'd probably go on a shooting rampage if she was ever forced to give-up the traditional entitlements and privileges that she pretends to not use whenever they're convenient. When you come to a country like Japan, the egregious hypocrisy and nastiness of Ameriskanks comes-out in spades. For instance: if you ever call an Ameriskank a "slut", they'll explode in fury. "Why is it when a woman asserts her sexuality, she's a slut?!" they'll screech. But when they come to Japan they'll see foreign men with Japanese girlfriends and get angry because they're not the center of attention anymore. So they'll start to grumble that Japanese women must be a bunch of sluts(!) Hilarious. And "Where are the REAL men?" they'll demand, while wearing their Wonderbras, mascara and lipstick. "Why aren't there any REAL men left?" they'll whine, with their hair-extensions and acrylic nails. Utterly moronic. North American chicks are living examples of bait-and-switch fraud-- They try to convince you that you're getting a premium product but three days after you bring her home, a screw suddenly pops-loose and she starts to give-off a high-pitched

snarl. And the only way to make this nonstop grating go-away is through constant maintenance. It's high-priced pussy, yet it's still not quite worth it. This is not a site that advocates the subjugation of women... it just discusses the aspects of their personalities that drive us guys INSANE. But, here is MY personal #1 raison d'tre for this site... to voice my frustration over the fact that no matter how caring and polite and generous I've been to American women, NiceGuy could NEVER get the girl. In fact, just to add insult to injury the same women I pursued would seek relationships with total LOSERS. They dated drugdealers, scumbags, unemployable pig-idiots, gambling addicts, drunks, abusers, felons, drifters... dated ANYTHING rather than someone who actually cared about them (like I used to). They just plain REFUSED to date someone who WANTED to treat them well! If any of you American parents out there have a teenage daughter, then you've already noticed that she will strictly date swine! (By the way: those aforementioned jerky guys are to blame too... so just to get back on an even keel, I'm compensating with why Guys Suck.) For those of you who might dismiss me as a 'whiner': how can you be a whiner if you demand nothing short of your rights? If a woman points-out any doublestandards working against her, she is speaking-up for her rights. When a man does the same, he is 'whining'. It is a form of gender-discrimination if a man can't air a legitimate complaint without being called a whiner- 'whiner' being one of those loaded terms that is used to attack the messenger instead of the message itself. The following is why I am speaking-up for my rights: westerners don't live in a male-dominated society. The sad truth is that they live in a society that habitually blames men for everything. Furthermore, a woman believes in fairness and equality only when they benefit her. At any other time, those concepts barely enter her mind. Misogynists aren't born- they're made. Be informed: as far as you American chicks are concerned, you have killed-off the nice guy inside me. Got that? You have alienated a formerly respectful and generous person and totally turned him against you! From 2002 onwards, I'm bestowing my respect and kindness strictly on nonAmerican women. Because the American ones do not deserve a single speck of respect or kindness at all. I'll be adding stuff as time drags on. I admit, it's mainly disorganized, random, stream-of consciousness stuff... the way the human mind actually works. Some

very cool women have written to tell me that they like this site. But a lot of women don't like what I say. A lot of women have been very ticked-off by what I've said and send me emails accusing me of bastardry. Well- good! That only proves to me I'm hitting my target between the eyes. A woman can't stand to hear the truth when it doesn't flatter her ego. They know they can't argue with my facts, so they have no choice but to attack my character. Feel free to write ... (But since I'm busy working, I've gotten to the point where I can't respond as often as I'd like to. In fact, chances are I might not be able to reply at all. Apologies if I seem rude, but my schedule is utterly packed nowadays.) But send your thoughts. Be candid! Any horror stories about women who suck? Any women you want to get revenge on? Do you disagree with me? Do you have any naked pictures of your sister? (Made you laugh on that last one, didn't I?) And keep in mind: I do not want any more advice on how to get an American chick! Okay? That's like giving me advice on how to purchase real-estate in hell. That's like giving me advice on how to get cancer. I have zero interest in becoming more attractive to putrid, revolting, nonstop-lying skanks. If what you send me is intelligent (ex: no race-hate or homophobia, etc.) I'll probably post it... Read and enjoy. Please note that due to me working my butt-off at my job, I probably won't be able to answer in as timely a fashion that I'd like. (Note: some letters may be edited for readability or clarity. And all names have been changed to protect the innocent and the stupid. Except for that of my ex-fiance...) *Sincerest and most heartfelt apologies to all the fair women who get wrongfully slandered by my site. For instance, I get-along with many American ladies who are over the age of 40- they tend to agree that women in the 16-35 age-group are mostly lunatics. I'm only targeting the women who think it's perfectly okay to treat men unfairly- and they tend to fall within the aforementioned age-range. There are a lot of women out there who are fair to men, but I honestly don't run-across them very often. (I've also been told that this disclaimer of mine is too weak...) **I say this because there are also a lot of sexist women out there who think they're perfectly fair in everything they do- because they don't even know they're sexist. Because they think of sexism as something that men do to women and not the other way around. They don't think misandry is wrong; they think it's perfectly okay to be prejudiced and bigoted. They look at their own behavior and immediately say 'I'm not sexist, and even if I am, men are worse sexists than women are...' (Ain't that sexism, too?)

A brief message from Egghead:

NiceGuy has moved on.

Well, mostly. He may check in occasionally, but for the most part, he has moved on to a new, happier phase of his life. So, I wouldn't make any wagers about him personally coming back to update the site. We do have some new writers though, so hopefully they will continue to bring you enjoyment from time-to-time The site - I encourage you to read it. Here it is, everything NiceGuy published, unedited. But hopefully a little easier to navigate now. NiceGuy imbued this site with his wisdom. Oh, yes. I think NiceGuy is wise. Not because he had all the answers - far from it! Instead, I believe NiceGuy has a child-like wisdom because he asked questions. Like Socrates, NiceGuy asked questions that shook up the staus quo. He was a gadfly for feminism. Thanks to the internet, NiceGuy's questions did not go unheard. His site allowed him to come in contact with other men who were asking the same questions - and a few answers. And a willingness to work together (and argue amongst themselves) to figure out more. And then there is the forum (BBS). NiceGuy's Forum is, perhaps, his greatest legacy. At nearly 400,000 posts, there's a lot of information there. Check it out, read a while, and once you're ready to join the conversation, introduce yourself and tell us your story. What happened to NiceGuy, you ask? Oh, it's the best story in the world. He met a nice woman from Japan, he married her, and he lived happily ever after. - Egghead, 2 June 2008

Nice Guys Finish Last

A wise man once told me, "As a man, you have to die once in order to live." I never fully appreciated his advice, nor did I understand it until I experienced it firsthand. From that time on, I understood the origins of the Jerk vs. Nice Guy battle. Readers may be asking themselves, "What in the world is this guy talking about?" Well, I'm referring to the widely known fact that women habitually date men that are jerks while the "nice" guys are often left twiddling their thumbs in solitaire. Does this sound familiar to anyone? Figuratively speaking, in order for a man to enjoy the company of women and be able to seduce them, his inner nice guy must first die through heartache. It is at this point that his inner bad boy surfaces and goes on the prowl. Any man that has experienced true love, only to have his heart crushed by the woman that he thought he would spend his life with, will understand what I am talking about. A man that has never experienced the heartache of being burned by the one person he really trusted probably won't understand my commentary. In any case, it is important to understand why nice guys finish last and why they probably always will. to die Contrary to what most women think, men are interested in successful relationships. Most men will never pass up the chance to date the woman of their dreams. In fact, when a man does encounter this rarity of a woman, his passion gets the better of him. The thoughts that race through his mind are something along the lines of, "This woman is a keeper. I'm going to treat her right and do all I can to make her happy." The only problem with being the nice guy is that you also become the boring, predictable guy. The excitement of the seduction process begins to fade for the woman because she has what she wants and doesn't have to do any chasing. Eventually the woman starts losing interest and before you know it, her eyes start to wander. In the end, she'll look for a new man who will bring excitement back into her life by being the "new and improved" challenge. Pursuit and excitement usually stem from selfish attitudes, much like the bad boy who doesn't care about anyone but himself. The nice guy will be left heartbroken and will start wondering what in the world he did wrong. It's at this point that men begin to realize that most women generally don't know

what they want from us. Evidently, being the nice guy certainly doesn't help. The conclusion of the aforementioned scenario? The death of the nice guy persona. So that's the life and death of the nice guy and, as a result, "Mr. Nice" is resurrected into "Mr. Jerk". As long as nice guys continue to get burned, there will always be a healthy supply of new jerks on the horizon to provide the dose of misery that women seem to yearn for. Eventually (often quite quickly), these nice guys will realize what type of man women actually want. The result is something that snaps inside of them as they begin to mimic the jerks that most women seem to pursue incessantly. To become that kind of man, the charade must be taken to the extreme, which involves acting like a selfish person that has no regard for other people's feelings. This amounts to a jerk that will say anything to get a woman into bed. The jerk will furnish her with tons of roller coaster emotions and once he has sex with her, he'll dump her. Why? Because he feels vengeful and wants to burn women the same way he was burned. Remember; once you get burned, don't STOP playing with fire -- you TAME the flame. So when women inadvertently give life to these jerks, they are really shooting themselves in the feet. That's the life and legacy of jerks everywhere. a balanced character If nice guys are what women really want, then why is it that most nice guys are single? Why is it that we constantly hear stories about women dating big jerks that took them for a ride -- literally? The fact is that women generally don't want nice guys, or maybe they're too busy chasing after jerks to realize that they do. Why? Because women act on impulse and emotion rather than fact. Who do you suppose brings out these same irrepressible emotions in women? The jerks, of course. So what does this all add up to? No one wants to get hurt, but in the same instance, no one wants to be perceived as a jerk either. That is why it's important to have a balanced attitude towards relationships. A man has to be able to court a woman, amuse her and excite her while continuously remaining a challenge. In other words, be nice to women, but remember who comes first in life; you, your irreplaceable family and friends, and then your woman. By following my theory, women will constantly be in hot pursuit. If you would like a female's opinion regarding this matter, go see The Jerk Appeal.

The Jerk Appeal

There seems to be a mystery among the male species, besides their unending quest of trying to figure women out. Why is it that the nice guys always seem to be single while jerks are the ones whose little black books get filled with magical numbers? It seems to go backwards, doesn't it? We know that AskMen.com readers, as well as all men around the world, think the same thing as one of our male correspondents touched on the same topic in his article, Nice Guys Finish Last. He was obviously trying to save men from the headaches females seem to cause. Although Curt Smith was right by saying that women like the excitement of the bad boy, he doesn't really explain why . There must be more out there to justify why women are left crying their eyes out because their boyfriends hurt them once again. And of course, the girl goes back to the bad boy, while the sweet boy is left in the corner of the bar dipping his olives in and out of his martini. Yes Curt, you are right; in order for a man to develop a backbone and become more of a bad boy, in the hopes of attracting more women, he does have to be badly hurt once. However, there is a lot more to it than that. Observe. self-esteem goes a long way It doesn't take a dozen self-help books and men's magazines to tell you how important self-esteem is when it comes to relationships and behavior. When it comes down to the enigma of the sweet girl and the bad boy, the man isn't the only one plagued by low self-esteem. The union of this couple can be blamed on lack of self-confidence where both parties are concerned. There are many reasons why men are jerks to begin with. First, they can simply be born to fit the character and their loser behavior can be blamed purely on a genetic disaster and negative social environment. If we have a problem, we'll just have to take it up with his DNA. The second reason can be what Curt was referring to; the nice guy turns bad boy because of

heartache. In this case, the guy becomes a jerk because he's been burned in the past and doesn't want this to happen again. The third reason is the major one, partly related to reason number two; he simply has no self-esteem. This poor man needs to act like a jerk to cover up his lack of confidence. It's a sad, sad case. Ironically, most people would think that he is a jerk because he has too much confidence (this could also be the case), but this is where we are fooled most of the time. We can't imagine that this jerk actually has a low self-esteem because he is so insensitive towards everyone around him. Not only is he a jerk, he is also a great actor. His bad boy demeanor is his shield; the weapon that gives the illusion of confidence. But most importantly, it ensures that he will never get hurt. His snide remarks and sarcasm are used as defense mechanisms, kind of how a skunk releases a stench to ward off those who may be a threat. Don't worry; the woman doesn't get away from this one easily. The woman who falls for this poor excuse of a man suffers from the same lack of selfesteem. In essence, these two make a perfect match. This poor girl has no self-esteem of her own and probably doesn't believe she can do better than this man. He has literally become the cause for the loss of all her friends and those Ben & Jerry's binges when he stands her up once again on Saturday night to meet his boys instead. one hundred dollars per hour I still stand by the fact that the woman who falls for the jerk is most likely to suffer from low self-esteem, but there could be another very important reason. In case men haven't noticed, women love playing the role of the relationship therapist. That's right, some women would do anything just to have the chance to get others to pour out their troubles, while they attribute most problems to an Oedipal pre-adolescent complex. Most women love to know that they're the ones who discovered the solution to their boyfriends' problems and, in turn, healed them (so to speak).

To do this, they need a troubled soul to lie down in that leather couch; the jerk boyfriend. Most girls love to know that they "fixed" their jerk boyfriend. He was once a bad boy, but now he is a sweetheart and he's a changed man, all thanks to her. Yes, this is the challenge most women enjoy seeking, an incredible feat where they claim to have turned a lost soul around. If a man was perfect to begin with, what would be so exciting in the relationship? Women would be bored and they would probably have to create nonexistent problems in the relationship to spruce things up a little. a balancing act Curt Smith was right when he discussed that balance is a solution to this twisted phenomenon. A man should be able to act sweet and gentlemanly when dating a woman, all while maintaining some mystique. Simply find some sort of middle ground because no woman wants a pushover. But here is the good news; a girl who constantly falls for jerks is probably not worth having in the first place. Just be yourself, because whoever said that nice guys finish last was never in a relationship with a great girl. In the long run, the jerks are left with little black books filled with phone numbers of insecure girls, while the sweethearts get the woman worth spending a lifetime with. jerk appeal The reason why even the sweetest of women gravitate toward the jerk at one point or another is because he exhibits certain qualities that appeal to women universally. Sane women are not ball-busters by nature and want a man who has a backbone and displays a healthy amount of testosterone. We can't help but be drawn to the jerk's confidence and the fact that he doesn't let people walk all over him or tell him what to do. A relationship with a jerk usually gets ugly because he will inevitably take any sign of attachment from the woman he is with as a threat to his freewheeling ways, and go out of his way to show her that he is, well, a jerk. For instance, if the woman mentions a concert she'd like to see with him in a month from now, he will interpret this as her wanting to be his ball and

chain and will probably go out and find himself another woman ASAP -without telling the ball and chain of course. So, the woman ends up not knowing what happened and goes crying to her friends about wanting the antithesis of the jerk: the nice guy. But alas, he is also all wrong. nice guy appeal After being with the jerk, the nice guy looks really appealing. He is kind, listens and can't believe that jerk would cheat on a girl like her. But after he helps mend her broken heart, he suddenly becomes too nice. I mean, he watches chick flicks, goes shopping with her, and never says no. The problem? She starts to feel like he is more of a girlfriend than a boyfriend, and finds herself longing for "a real man." Hence the confusing conundrum. So which is it? What do women want? We want the best of both worlds. Call it a nice jerk if you will, but I prefer the term sensitive bastard. johnny depp Stay with me here. Johnny Depp was voted "Sexiest Man Alive" by People magazine in 2004. The key to his sex appeal? He is the ultimate sensitive bastard. On one hand, he has a bunch of tattoos, smokes like a chimney, marches to the beat of his own drum, and never feels the need to explain or apologize for his behavior; on the other hand, he is a family man who adores his wife, and plays Barbie with his daughter and trucks with his son. What's my point? He exhibits the qualities that women like about the jerk, such as confidence, a backbone, and a devilish twinkle in his eye, as well as the sensitivity and kindness of the nice guy, without falling into either of these traps. By pointing this out, I am not implying that you should emulate his behavior; I am merely citing him as one of many possible examples of the sensitive bastard. So take a cue from the man and learn to walk that fine line.

the fine line The way to keep the woman of your dreams interested in you and only you is to be sensitive while retaining your masculinity. Know when to be kind and understanding, and when to stick to your guns, so to speak. For instance, if she just got fired and is devastated, that is when you should be her shoulder to cry on and do something nice for her like rent her favorite comedy on DVD and watch it with her. On the other hand, if she decides to redecorate your place while you're away and you return to find that your bedroom is now really "pretty," it's time to sit your little woman down and let her know that she really shouldn't have . The key is to avoid both extremes of the nice guy and the jerk. Don't be at her beck and call, but be there for her when she needs you most. Don't cheat on her, but go out with the guys and don't let her give you any grief about it. Don't ever let her think that she can tell you what to wear, eat, think, or say, but listen to and respect her opinion. You get the idea. This way, she knows that you love her but that she can't walk all over you, which is the key to her loving and respecting you. Throw in a romantic gesture or two every now and then and she'll be so in love, she won't know what hit her. Think about it, if you give her the best of both worlds, why would she ever want to look elsewhere? trust me You have to trust me on this one because most women don't even know that this is what they want, but unless they are users or man-haters, it is. So don't listen to any more crap about women wanting Mr. Sensitive and falling into the arms of Mr. Jerk; be the sensitive bastard they can't get enough of.

Why Women Love Dating Jerks

It's an endless mystery; women claim that they want a nice and caring man, but when you inspect the evidence, the only thing that will make a woman's heart go thump is the attitude of the macho, egotistical, self-serving male. an invitation Mike Hubberd, the producer of the Debra Duncan Show decided to see if he could find the answers to such a mystery and invited Renee Piane (author of Love Mechanics ), Neil Scott (Psychotherapist), Cowboy Bill, Chris Jericho (WWF wrestler), and yours truly to debate why women keep kicking nice guys to the curb and welcoming in the jerks. bring out de- bait Needless to say, everyone had their respective opinion, but the ones that caught my attention were Ms. Piane's remark about traumatic experiences, and Chris Jericho's "it's all bullsh*t" outburst. emotional void Renee Piane remarked that when women are attracted to jerks, it's because of an emotional event that occurred at some point in their lives. According to Piane, the most common event is when the woman loses her father at a very young age. Usually, this emotional void leads her to seek any man to fulfill this void, and when she finds him, she becomes so attached that she'll just take any abuse thrown at her. This explanation makes sense. However, it only explains why women are addicted to and stay in abusive relationships. But it did not offer any explanation as to why women are attracted to jerks to begin with. After all, I know a lot of women who come from a stable family environment and still date jerks. bad boy is a nice guy Of all the comments that were exchanged back and forth between the guests, the dumbest one had to come from the genius wrestler (why does that not surprise me?) Chris Jericho.

Mr. Jericho claims to be a nice guy, and what he portrays in the ring is very different from his real personality. When asked what his thoughts were about nice guys finishing last, Chris went into his whole wrestling spiel shouting, "It's all bullsh*t, I'm a nice guy and I don't finish last. Just be yourself and you'll meet lots of fine people." That sounds perfect in a magical world where stars are flying around your head after the The Rock shows you the people's elbow. Of course any nice guy with celebrity status, a fat bank account (even though it doesn't look like it by his fashion sense -- wearing tights for so many years will do that to a man), and an exciting bad boy persona will keep a woman interested. no more groupies But take away Jericho's celebrity status, wealth and bad boy persona, and let's see how far his nice guy attitude will take him, or how many women will fall at his feet. So I guess Jericho's just going to have to keep acting like a bad boy to stay popular in wrestling, and now that the WWF owns the WCW, Mr. Jericho might have to become a little more mean, especially if he wants to reach superstar status with new bad boys coming to his playground. curt knows I know why women prefer jerks over nice guys. It's actually very easy to explain. In fact, once I'm finished, every nice guy is going to want to enroll in Curt's How To Be Her Dream Jerk seminar. But before continuing, it's important to clarify what constitutes jerks and nice guys. the nice guy The nice guy cannot set his priorities straight. He lives to please everyone around him at all costs -- even if it means he has to sacrifice his own happiness. In other words, he's a pushover who can't say no to anyone and lets himself get walked on. He's so nice that he'd even do his girlfriend's ex a favor. The nice guy does not practice the game of challenge and eventually gets dumped as the woman in his life becomes bored with all the niceness.

the jerk A jerk wears his agenda on his sleeve. He's a strong, dominant, untamable man who knows the dating game and how to prioritize his life -- putting himself first. He won't let people walk all over him, and by doing so, he effectively becomes a challenge. A lot of people think the jerk has low self-esteem and needs to prey on other souls in order to make himself feel better. I say rubbish. It's a lot more than low self-esteem. Humans consider themselves civilized, but the fact remains that we're still animals and civilization is only skin deep. The reality is that we have millions of years of instincts programmed within us and ten thousand years of civilization will not silence the animal instincts within. So when you notice the jerk manifest, it is not because he has low self-esteem, but rather because he knows the rules of the game: survival of the fittest. After all, when we observe a lion copulating with all the lionesses, we don't say that the lion has low self-esteem. Instead, we say that the lion is a dominant male ensuring that his genes get passed on to the next generation. Well, why can't we accept that the human male has the same instincts? Food for thought, right? the jerk has his act together Through time, we evolve and adapt to our environment -- including our mating rituals. So if the bad boy strategy didn't work, it would have been discontinued many centuries ago. But because it works, jerks continue to flourish. Remember; if it isn't broken don't fix it. And that's exactly what jerks are doing. Women are obviously interested in certain jerk behaviors. As long as women are demanding a certain type of behavior (the jerk appeal), there will always be a healthy supply of jerks to go around.

what women want A few months ago, I attended a single women group meeting. I took this opportunity to ask the women what kind of a man they're looking for. Every woman claimed that she wanted a nice man. I asked if the nice guy is "the perfect guy", and all of them agreed that there is no such thing as a perfect guy. Then I asked the women to assume for a moment that perfection was attainable and if so, would it eventually become a disappointment or lead to boredom. Amazingly, 90% of the women said yes. Thus if the perfect man is a myth and perfection leads to boredom, these women were essentially saying that the perfect man doesn't exist and even if he does, he's boring. So what do women want or rather, what do women need ? what women need What women want and what they need are two different things. You see, civilization dictates that women want a nice family-oriented man. But evolution tells women they need a strong dominant male to mate with and ensure strong offspring. Unfortunately for them, it's their animal instincts that override their learned behavior. It is not that women deliberately look for jerks, but rather, they're attracted to certain behaviors that satisfy their genetically programmed mating instincts. This has a lot to do with estrogen -- the emotion hormone -- as opposed to testosterone -- the reaction hormone. Therefore women are attracted to men who can make them feel, feel, feel excited -- not bored. Unfortunately, these behaviors are also the ones observed mainly within the jerk persona. So women are not bad people at all, they have no choice but to fall for these dominant, strong and untamable males. the truth hurts... we're animals We like to think of ourselves as the superior beings of this planet. In order to separate ourselves from the animal kingdom, we come up with civil explanations for our behaviors such as women love jerks because they think they can change them, they're exciting, there's a mystique element, bad guys

are cooler, jerks are better in bed, and women feel sorry for them because they are lower life forms. But the reality is that women are at the mercy of their genetically programmed instincts. The sooner we realize this, the faster men will understand what women need and combine it with the chivalrous traits the women want. If men can have a balance of those dominant behaviors that women instinctively need and those nice behaviors that women want in order to remain satisfied, they'll maintain a lethal combination that will attract and retain any woman. Here are some of the traits you should have on your list. Women want a man who: Can make them think. Can make them feel excitement, sexy, and turned on rather than bored. Can prioritize his life and doesn't let anyone walk over him. Is not afraid to voice his opinion. Keeps them on their toes through challenge. Holds and maintains an element of mystery. Is spontaneous. Gives them space and freedom, and keeps his own space. Is a lover, not a son. Is a Romeo, not a Fabio. Is chivalrous. curt's corner So what did you learn today? If nice guys are what women want, and jerks are what women need, it is important to keep a balanced character towards the relationship. Get it on!

How Do I Go About Meeting A Nice Guy Who Will Not Abuse Me?
Here is another cool question from yahoo answers. Check it out and see if it resonates with you. I am going back in the dating scene almost 5 years after my last relationship ended. How do I go about meeting a nice guy who will not abuse me? My quick answer to this question: I am posting this question for the benefit of the guys reading this blog. If you actually research the nice-guy phenomenon from the womens perspective Youll find some odd shit Really odd. Women who claim they cant meet a nice-guy no matter how hard they try, how all they keep meeting is jerks. This is all odd to you, coz youre a nice-guy and cant meet a girl to save your life, and you keep seeing them go for the jerks, right? Wrong! Lol, sorry. Youre just as deluded as she is. Sure, she keeps attracting and choosing the most assholish asshole straight out of hell, and being completely dishonest to herself about it, but you, as a nice guy have a deep dark hidden secret, and you need to face up to it, just like she needs to face up to her dark secret. Whats your secret? Youre not really a nice-guy. Most guys who call themselves a nice guy, are really just guys who use niceness as a substitute for beign attractive and/or masculine. Want proof? When was the last time you walked into a social setting and befriended and charmed everyone in that bar/room. Is it any wonder most nice-guys just coincidentally happen to also be shy? When women say i want to meet a nice guy, they dont mean i want to meet a mumbling guy who walks around with his head lowered, has no ambitions in life and whines about how women dont like him but go to jerks instead. When says she wants to meet a nice guy, what she really means is a GOOD MAN. And the part shes leaving out, (since its assumed for her) is how she defines a MAN. Her definition of a man is someone who gives her butterflies. Someone who has that fire inside of him and who makes her feel like a woman.

Unfortunately, we leave in a society where men have been so pussywhipped, that the only guys who dont act like pussywhipped she-men are abusive jerks. Shes actually just being superficial (just like we all are). Shed rather have the manly idiot, than the nice wuss. Dont blame her for it, we guys do it too. Wed rather be with the neurotic dumb stripper, than the obese, but super nice and kind geekgirl. And yes, most nice guys are the equivalent of a nice, cuddly morbidly obese geekgirl.

Top 10 Reasons Nice Guys Never Get Women

Heres another article from some guy who gets this stuff. Maybe he took my secret quiz? Here is his article below: Top 10 Reasons Nice Guys Never Get Women You probably cant count how many times you heard the phrase, Nice Guys Finish Last. These nice guys time and time again allow themselves to get stomped on by women, its sad to watch. What makes it more incredible is they dont even realize their errors and get frustrated with their lack of success with women. In clubs, bars or just at house parties you can spot nice guys from a mile away. They devote much of their time into doing things for women to the point they forget about taking care of themselves. Here are the top 10 reasons nice guys never get women: 1: They are way too needy. Whenever I see guys clinging on to women 24/7 I seriously want to vomit in disgust. These guys have zero self confidence and radiate loser where ever they go. 2: His happiness is dependent on his relationships the girl hes seeing. He has no friends of his own and will devote all his time to that one girl. He calls all the time and doesnt give her the chance to miss him. 3: Nice guys are well too nice to women. They dont challenge women and in short wind up being a push around. Women will not value a man if he doesnt challenge them and arent fun or adventurous. I cant stress how awful men appear to women that are too nice. 4: Nice guys give up all the power. Women in general will test a man to see what his reaction will be. Nice guys will fail this test by apologizing and doing whatever she says putting aside his own needs. All she needs to do is throw a tantrum and he becomes a doormat.

5: Nice guys tend to be shy around women. He acts nervously around other people especially with women and wont make the effort to step forward and talk or make any connections with people. 6: Nice guy are emotional tampons. He will sit there and listen to all her problems the way a girlfriend would. 7: Trying to buy her affection with gifts and dinners. Major mistake nice guys make simply because at the core of it women will not respect a guy who tries to buy their affection. Its the perfect recipe for her to move on to some other guy and the nice guy has nothing to show for, just loads of money down the drain. 8: Nice guys dont exude confidence around women. Women want a man to take charge and be confident. As much as women want to claim that they want a sweet guy they are completely contradicting themselves because at the end of the day women are attracted to men who knows what they want and take charge with no apologies. 9: Nice guys dont embrace their masculinity. They feel that they must put in check their masculine desires and apologize for being a man! There is nothing wrong with being a man but thanks to the American feminist movement men today are afraid to show their true masculine nature. 10: Nice guys apologize unnecessarily. Whatever happens they apologize even if its her fault. If the girl the women they are with begin to act bratty the nice guy will apologize and give in to her behavior. Save your apologies for big-time bloopers. There are many nice guys that share several if not all of these characteristics which simply spell disaster for their social lives especially with women. The cold hard truth is that women are repulsed by nice guys. They dont challenge women and once that happens nice guys are placed in the friends category and any attraction is now gone.

Why Nice Guys Finish Last

Ok, so you want to know why nice guys finish last. Everyone on planet earth seems to claim this, so it must be true huh? Do you want to know the truth on why nice guys finish last? Do you want the truth of all truths? The reason nice guys finish last is NOT because they are NICE. Let me give you an example. You have a choice between a cocaine-addicted stripper whos extremely hot and just super sexual And then a 500 pound geeky girl. The geeky girl is really nice, she does things for you, shes always super nice and always super nice. Who do you go for? Most men would rather go for the arrogant, bitchy stripper. What the geeky girl will then do is go Oh, guys dont like nice girls, bohoo. Now is her conclusion true? Of course not! Its not her NICENESS that got her rejected. She was simply not attractive. Most nice guys are really unattractive guys. And Im not talking about physical looks. Im talking in terms of personality. Ever notice how most nice guys lack social skills or are shy? They are using niceness as a way to compensate for not being a hot guy. Its an attempt at saying I know I might not be hot, but here, take this niceness of mine Please bang me, because if you bang me, I will be super nice to you! If this approach didnt work for the 500 pound geeky girl, why would it work for you? Why should it work for guys? The answer is it shouldnt work for guys either! Let me ask you a question. If Brad Pitt was nice to girls, you think girls would reject him? OF COURSE NOT. Hes Brad Pitt for crying out loud. In fact, THIS is the reason why girls keep talking about how they want a nice guy. Ever seen how girls always say I wish I could meet a nice guy. And then they go for the jerkiest jerk straight out of hell, right? Are they lying? No, its just that their sentence is incomplete. What they really mean is I would like to meet a hot, confident, masculine guy who goes for what he wants and is a real man, and at the same time treats me nice. In essence, most women are picking the arrogant stripper (jerk) over the 500 pound geek (nice guy). A guy has the best of both worlds would be IDEAL.

Approaching And Dating Women The Real Reason Nice Guys Finish Last
I think you if would ask any woman in the world, they would tell you that they want a guy who is nice to them. So why does it seem that when it comes to approaching and dating women, nice guys finish last? In truth, its not being nice that undermines most guys. Its being boring, predictable nice that does them in. You can be loud. You can be obnoxious. You can be egotistical. You can be a complete jerk. You can even be all of these things together and still stand a better chance of getting a girl to go out with you then if you bore her to death with the same old predictable behavior she gets from almost every other guy she meets. Read the above statement a couple more times to get the full impact of what Im saying. Now Im NOT telling you to change into some loud, obnoxious egotistical jerk. Im just pointing out how low a boring, predictable, nice guy ranks on a womans attraction list. When I say boring, Im not talking about that guy we all know who drones on and on about some opinion or theory he has that nobody else cares beans about. Im talking about just the normal guy who might be the life of the party when hes out with his friends, but when he tries talking to a woman he turns into some under-confident, approval-seeking weenie guy who just says all the unimaginative things that hot women hear all the time.

Even if hes a great looking guy, shes going to get bored relatively quickly when she realizes that this guy is just like every other guy that she could get with the snap of her fingers. How many times have you been out at a party or other social gathering and seen some totally hot woman, who you would kill for, out with some obnoxious jerk who seems to be treating her like garbage. Yet shes hanging all over him and amorously ogling him like hes Gods gift to women, even if hes not much to look at. In fact, sometimes it seems like the jerkier the guy, the hotter the girl on his arm. So, what the heck is up with that? Whats up is that is that most women are much more attracted to an exciting, unpredictable alpha male, even if they have to put up with some jerky behavior, then they are with some sweet, but boring, nice guy who presents no challenge to them what-so-ever. Its like choosing to go down the steep, mogul-filled ski slope rather than the nice safe predictable little bunny hill. Everyone likes a challenge. Its what makes life interesting and worth getting up for every morning. And this is the exact thing that most attracts women. Unfortunately, most guys have been brought up to believe that women are instead attracted to a safe, predictable, nice guy who will do anything for her. When woman after woman rejects them, and instead chooses some self-absorbed jerk, these self-proclaimed nice guys are completely baffled. Now there is nothing wrong with being nice. But there is a big difference between being boring, predictable, harmless nice and a more edgy, challenging, provocative nice.

Remember in the movie Swingers, where Vince Vaughn is coaching John Favreau before he walks up to talk to a girl at the bar. Vince Vaughn tells him: I want you to go over to that girl and I want you to get those digits. - Youre money. Come here a second. Listen to me. Look it, when you go up to talk to her, man, I dont want you to be the guy in the PG-movie everyones REALLY hoping makes it happen. I want you to be like the guy in the R-rated movie, you know? The guy youre not sure whether or not you like yet. Youre not sure where hes coming from, okay? Youre a bad man. Youre a bad man. Youre a bad man. Bad man. dialogue from the movie Swingers-1996 This needs to be your mindset when approaching a woman. You want to be that guy who is a bit of a mystery to her. That guy shes not quite sure about, but for some reason attracts her at a gut level. That guy she cant quite figure out, and who she wants to explore further. This doesnt mean you have to act like a jerk. In fact I encourage you to be nice. Just dont be boring, approval-seeking nice. Those nice guys do finish last.

Why it is Said Nice Guys Finish Last

The term nice guy is a bit ambiguous and subject to debate. No single person can claim to be good through and through, 100% pure goodness. When it comes to dating and relationships, guys are usually classified into two categories, the nice guys and the bad guys or the jerks. Now, in the dating game, how do nice guys perform? Do nice guys? really finish last in this game? Is it true that they are underdogs in the dating game? The world must be a very strange place. Otherwise why would a woman looking for a potential mate overlook a nice guy and instead choose a bad guy? A resent research in the UK indicated that many women looking for potential mates preferred the so called nice guy. Tradition has it that women prefer the macho man. A man with a square jaw, broad shoulders, rough brow with small eyes and packed with muscles. It is genetically embedded in the woman. She still looks for a mate who can defend her and her children. Toughness means a macho male will sire strong children. This survey indicated that the macho man who falls in the category of the bad guy is not preferred by a woman who is planning to start a family. It was realized that bad guys are less committed to their partners and families. They have a rogue spirit that will not allow them to settle down especially with one partner. Bad and rogue guys hold a lot of attraction to a woman. It must be exciting to do the extraordinary, or to break the norms set down by the society. On the other hand maybe a nice guy is dull in the eyes of a woman. Or how do you explain why a woman falls in the hands of a heart breaker and continues to stick there despite being approached by really nice guys? She is molested psychologically but nothing will stop her from pursuing this man. She feels her destiny lies with this man, a bad guy. But you ask yourself, where are the nice guys? It must be natural selection at work. The nice guys are pushed aside by

the alpha male in the dating scene. The alpha male also translates into a bad guy. This male is at the top of the pecking order in the male hierarchy. The nice guys are at the lower order. They fade into oblivion when the alpha male is in sight and hence the alpha male dominates the females. Whether or not nice guys finish last, was settled by the UK survey. It was established that women who want to settle down and have children and start a family, usually feature the nice guys on their priority list. It was concluded that nice guys will dedicate their time to their families and are committed to their partners. They were favored by women due to their capacity of maintaining long term relationships. This is why they are much sought after when a woman has finally decided to settle down in that part of the world. It would only be fair to conclude that, in the long run nice guys do not really finish last. The tide has turned in their favor.

What Is The Difference Between A Gentleman And A Nice Guy?

Here is another cool question from yahoo answers. Check it out and see if it resonates with you. And which one are you? I dont really like the term, so I think Im just a nice guy. How about you, are you a gentleman? My quick answer to this question: Great question, because many people assume a nice-guy is a gentleman Hes not. A gentleman is a compliment, a nice-guy is an insult. A gentleman is a strong, confident, manly man who gives and is courteous out of respect. A nice guy is a weak boy-man giving in order to get approval and trying to be liked. Why Does The Nice Guy All Ways Finish Last? Here is another question about why nice guys finish last Now, its obvious he hasnt taken my secret quiz for nice guys, that gets nice guys laid But Ill answer his question anyway. Question I mean everywhere I go I see nice girls with complete jerks. Whats the deal do they like being treated like crap? My quick answer to this question: Do girls like being treated like crap? Not really. So why do they always go for jerks Well, they tend to not have a choice. Think about it like this, if your only choice was between a cokehead, occasionally violent drama queen who is a professional stripper and looks like

your favorite porn star OR an obese, super geeky, super asexual (but nice) morbidly obese girl. Whom would you choose? The stripper of course! Do you really like to have a cokehead girlfriend? No, but physical attractiveness and sexuality are more important to you than nice-ness Same thing with girls. Contrary to popular belief, theyre as shallow as men are. Theyd rather have the hot sexy jerk, than a completely emasculated, boring, shy unsexy guy. See, most nice guys are extremely unattractive and unsexy. Not because theyre not jerks but since we live in a culture that gives people two wrong choices, become the macho or the nice guy. Same with women, become the effeminate insecure geek girl, or become a sexy bitch. There are good men and good women Like a guy whos sexy, confident, masculine AND at the same time mature, respectful and nice, giving, caring But these men are rare, very rare. As rare as a real woman, a mature, confident, nice, sexy woman. Women dont choose jerks, they settle for jerks. Your personal solution? Become a GOOD man The guy who has the advantages of both the jerk and the nice guy, and women will be fighting over you and dumping jerks to be with you.

dating quiz

Tony October 18, 2009 at 12:17 pm Nice guys dont always finish last. Its almost always in the way you preceive your situation. Not being in a relationship, or choosing who and when you date, doesnt mean in any way that you have finished last. With girls these days many guys have found it easier to play them. Girls are so naieve and self absorbed these days. They have no confidence and use their self-pitty to attract guys. Nice guys often fall for these types of girls who end up hurting them in the end becuase all they wanted or thought they needed was attention.

In some cases, its the girls kindness that guys take advantage of. If a girl is with a disrespecful guy it may be because shes never had another real relationship, so she doesnt know what to expect. Or she doenst know how to leave. If anyone you know has a relationship like that, you should talk to them becuase its better that she knows how other people view their relationship. Myabe it would make her think about other options. If you keep a level head and make sure you really know someone before you date, you will be better off getting a girl who would respect you for who you are. :]

XxCoryxX October 18, 2009 at 12:25 pm Those type of girls are stuck up bitches who are basically sluts who only date *bad boys* and those type of girls are usually immature and stupid to not realize how bad the bad boy or jerk is treating them. Sorry if anyone gets offended but it sometimes happens. Most of the times I see nice guys with nice girls because most of my teachers in High School are nice and are married to nice girls and not all nice guys finish last Ive seen allot of couples in stores that are really nice too. I am nice and I will wait until I graduate High School or Finish College to find me a nice girl until I have to or die a virgin. I just dont understand why most girls these days hate the nice guys who try to get their attention and try so hard to ask them out. And yeah I hate bad boys so I basically dont care what people say to me because I hate it when men treat woman like crap and it really ticks me off when I see a woman crying on the ground whenever a man miss treats her badly. Sorry if I get allot of thumbs down though because of being a nice guy I just hate the fact that the world hates them. And no I am not *too nice* I can sometimes be a cool guy and I have a bad side unfortunately when someone gets me mad. Kay-Lynn October 18, 2009 at 12:46 pm

No they dont like being treated like crap, but they do like a guy with balls. Nice guys always finish last because they dont have the balls to make Girls want a fun, adventurous guy whos confident. Unfortunately, most of the guys who meet that criterion are also assholes. You dont have to be an asshole to get girls but youve got to have confidence and not be too chickensh*t to make a move on a girl. Girls dont respect a guy who worships the ground they walk on. BTW: Dont listen to any advice a girl gives you on this subject. Girls dont understand what a nice guy is. When they say nice guy them mean the fun adventurous type that isnt a jerk. Not the too nervous to ask a girl out type. LISTEN TO SMT, SHE KNOWS WHAT SHES TALKING ABOUT! - October 18, 2009 at 12:58 pm I think birds of a feather flock together. A person is drawn to people who remind them of themselves. Not totally, but familiarity attracts. So maybe these nice girls arent as nice as youre imagining them to be. I used to be a nice guy. And I used to wonder why I always got treated like crap by women. Then I realized there were plenty of girls who treated me well, but they just never seemed to capture my attention. Actually, I avoided them like they were toxic chemicals. I always chased after the feather in the wind. And then I realized something even more profound, I was a feather in the wind to girls. I would lead a girl on long enough to get that hit of I could have her if I wanted and then run away before anything serious would develop. I focused so hard on my dreams of perfect love with that great girl I was going to meet someday, focused so hard on how these unavailable girls were treating me, focused so hard on how great it would be if they could just see what a great lover Id make, I was blind to how I looked to others. In my mind I was the great lover who just needed a break. In reality my heart was closed, and full of hurt and fear. And these were the kind of people I drew into my life. LG October 18, 2009 at 1:15 pm

Thats life, girls like the bad boys and not the yes man. The yes man is to easy, girls like a challenge. You can try being a nice guy just dont smother them or submit to all their request. Dont always be available. You have a life dont always put theyre wants ahead of yours, dont always agree with them its okay to have your own opinion and they should respect you for that. Have self confidence and dont let her run your life, have interest beside just her. A lot of men live for their girl and when she dumps him, hes devastated, dont fall in this trap, it hurts to bad. When you meet the right girl, youll know it without any doubt, until then enjoy!! SMT October 18, 2009 at 1:59 pm Because nice guys are boring. So quit whining about it and learn from your mistakes. Its alright to be nice just not nice and boring. Girls like excitement and you dont typically get that with a nice guy. Jason O October 18, 2009 at 2:57 pm The guy that finishes last gets the girl that finishes last, and those are two great people. Those girls with the jerks? Forget them. Best things come to those who wait they always say.. Wiss October 18, 2009 at 2:59 pm maybe the girls arent that nice either or theyre just stupid and sometimes it really does seem like girls enjoy being treated bad, unfortunately not me. lol rorhinna October 18, 2009 at 3:10 pm Not all girls go for the jerky type. I dont at least; I love the nice guy type. IN the long run, the nice guys are gonna end up better off.

Why Are Ladies More Attracted To The Bad Guy Than The Nice Guy?
Heres another question on why do girls go for the bad guy, and not the nice guy. This guy has obviously not taken my nice-guy quiz, or hed know the answer, but Ill go ahead and answer him anyway. Question: Why Are Ladies More Attracted To The Bad Guy Than The Nice Guy? Like they know very well that a guy has played on the lives of many other girls and yet more girls fall for him and yet they by-pass the nice guy. My quick answer to this question: Well, if you had taken my quiz, you wouldnt even be asking this, lol Yeah, ready for the truth? This one is gonna shock you. Women are just as shallow as guys are. We live in a society where girls are made from sugar and spice and everything nice Well, its not true. See, the badboy is like the junk-food that she cant make herself not gorge on in 2-3 am after a bad day at work. We all say we like so called light, nice, nourishing food, but then go gorge on a bucket of icecream when were stressed out. A nice guy is kind of like Broccoli really. You claim to want it, but it tastes so freaking boring Badboys are exciting and tasty And really GOOD GUYS (best of both worlds) are extremely rare. Its not that women want bad-guys, its just that ussually they have no choice. She ussually has to pick from a boring, spineless, eunich who calls himself nice because he thinks its what women want OR the hot, sexy, challenging dude who happens to also be a selfish prick. Shes just picking the lesser evil. A nice guy to her, is like an obese, nice, kind, geek girl to you. And a badboy to her, is kind of like a coke-addicted super-hot stripper is to you You say you want a nice girl, but youd reject the obese geek girl for the cokehead stripper any day

Omar October 18, 2009 at 12:08 pm

Sorry, but you are wrong with your thinking. This is one of the biggest stereotypes about women. First off, not every girl is out there going after the same type of guy. We dont all want the same thing. I have never gone after the bad guy. None of the friends I have are like that either. Several people that have answered here arent like that. Dont base your opinion on limited experience. Next, SOME (not most, not all, not the majority) girls stay WITH a guy that is bad because they dont believe they deserve any better than what they have in front of them. They will believe that no one else will possibly come around, so they better stick with what they have. Again, I stress, this is SOME. Tabula Rasa October 18, 2009 at 12:20 pm You know, I think a lot of it has to do with maturity when it comes to relationships, honestly. I think more women who are not really ready for that stable relationship go for bad guys and thats usually younger girls. I think a lot of it has to do with the thrill and excitement of being with someone wild and its a turn on. However, for myself, Ive realized as Ive gotten older that bad guys arent really the type for me anymore at my age and so I tend to go for someone I could possibly have a future with. **STAR** October 18, 2009 at 12:47 pm Well some girls like the nice guy, but usually the bad guy comes off as mysterious, wounded, and deeper than he actually is. Every girl wants to be able to break the bad guy and make him fall so hard for her that hes willing to change his ways. Thats the most common reason: a Bad Guy is a challenge or mission. A Nice Guy can be easy to get. But Nice Guys are usually better. HappyGir October 18, 2009 at 1:37 pm you must be a nice guy:) the answer is kind of difficult to explain, as there are many reasons

-the savior complex- a woman sometimes thinks that if a guy is attractive and bad that she can save him from himself- that if he just spends some time with her, he will fall for her and stop being bad. -low self esteem- sometimes, even though a woman knows that the bad guy in question will just use her, she feels that she doesnt deserve any better. -danger complex- some women feel that nice guys are just too nice, and they need the spice of danger in the relationshipso even though they know that the relationship is hopeless, the bad guy isnt the one you bring home to the parents anyways. Hope this helps- and dont worry Mr. nice guy:) there are plenty of women who have learned that the bad boy isnt all that he is cracked up to be. jpfeff October 18, 2009 at 2:31 pm Most arentonly immature girls, those with issues or those who arent good judges of personality BTW, the players seem nice at first, how do you think they do it? Compared to a nice guy who might be really shy, I guess people are more likely to go for the confident guy showing interest. But most girls learn after high school not to do this, none of my friends ever had that problem and neither did I. H4 October 18, 2009 at 3:30 pm I say dont worry about it. Think of it like this, any girl that is going for the bad guy is insecure, and its a good thing shes not going for you. Theres good girls out there, just live your life and dont waste it all dreaming about girls. Eventually one will come to you. Good luck to you my friend.

Nice Guy That Got Dumped? 3 Easy Tips To Get Her Back
As you might have found out, being a nice guy tends to get you dumped by women. I mean they love the fact theyve finally found a nice guy, but over time, they no longer find you exciting, and think its time to upgrade. If this was the case with you, how do you get her back? Here are five tips! 1.) You want to surprise her with not being nice and available. My best friend followed this tactic, and now, 6 months later shes actually begging him to come back to her Even though she dumped him. The tactic is simply this Completely forget about her. Dont try to contact her, dont try to convince her to come back. In fact, immediately start acting as if though you have 10 other girlfriends. Just be cool about it, like Oh, ok. Like its the most normal thing in the world She dumped you, whatever, life goes on. You might have to fake it at first, but do it! 2.) Start developing an amazing, cool life. Like literally decide to take 6 months off to just do everything youve ever wanted to do. Sign up for a gym, sign up for dancing classes. Go and travel to all the places youve always wanted to go. Every personal goal youve put off? Decide to take 6 months to accomplish those, like losing weight, learning how to salsa dance, learning a new language Building a cool social circle Developing ability to approach women. 3.) Make as many new female friends as you can! Its better if theyre hot and/or attractive, but any female friends will do. What will happen is that your attitude will change. You will start acting more like a ladies man and be at ease around women. What will happen is whether you like it or not (but you do!), word will get back to her Just imagine this, youre now ripped, have a ton of cool friends, your entire attitude, clothes and lifestyle has changed AND youre not calling and begging her to come back!!! What will tend to happen is she will witness these changes either through friends, your facebook, or simply because she wont be able to take it anymore. If you do not contact her, in 2-3-4 months at most, shell contact you just wonder whats happening. Remember, if you were a nice guy, she will be completely confused why you no longer act nice, and give her everything she wants. This will drive her crazy and shell contact you first. When she does, she will be amazed at your transformation and beg you back. This strategy has been tested out, it works for nice guys too!

How Come Nice Guys Are Turning Into Jerks?

Heres a question from a girl at YahooAnswers. You can see how I answer her ignorant question about guys, or go straight to the secret quiz for guys, that helps nice guys get women. Question: I know a few guys who used to be9 really sweet and nice, but for some reason, they turned into jerks. I liked a few of them, but none of them ever asked me out. What is going on here? *scratches her head* My quick answer to this question: Im running another question from a girl, just so you see how clueless girls are about nice-guys. Let me answer her: What is going on here? Its the 21st century girl!! What the HECK are you doing waiting around waiting to be asked out? If you like a guy, YOU go and ask HIM out. Why do an increasing number of nice-guys turn jerks? Because no matter what you say, people wise-up eventually. No matter how many times girls say they like nice guys People arent blind, they see what happens in the real world. They see that being a nice-guy means being passed over by women. Now, on this site I dont advocate becoming a jerk. There is a middle-ground, where youre neither a jerk, nor a whiny submissive nice guy. This is what I propose. But I will be honest, and say that even though being a jerk isnt ideal, it still works 10 times better than being a nice guy. If you want guys to stop turning into jerks, start rewarding nice behaviour. You ASK THEM out. That answers her question (or of whatever girl stumbles into here)

Teresa P October 28, 2009 at 1:25 pm Called supply and demand. Most women dont like nice guys. Guys notice this, and change their ways for the better. (For them anyway) Why didnt you ask a nice guy out? You need to learn that good/ nice guys protect themselves from bad women, so they dont ask out much. You need to pounce girl !!! Good luck! Mike October 28, 2009 at 1:26 pm Lol, there are at least three girls here who answered all guys are idiots. Well at least theres no sexism here, sheesh. To answer the question, womenalmost across the boardare more attracted to traits of jerks than they are to traits of nice guys. Not because they choose to be (attraction is NOT a choice), but because they are biologically hardwired to seek traits in men that are common amongst jerks. The saying nice guys finish last didnt come about for no reason! So, this whole principle has lead to a whole new subculture of pick up artists, aka PUAs (do a google search), who are a bunch of frustrated nice guys who have done everything their whole lives to try to attract women but have fallen flat on their faces time and time again because women just arent attracted to their niceness, because to most women, niceness equates to wussiness. So in desperation to gain more respect from women, they have learned the ways of the PUAs and have tried to emulate their tactics (that is, to adopt those same traits that are common amongst jerks that women are attracted to). Why? Because it works. A sad state of affairs? Definitely. But in the end its all about biologically hardwired social dynamics. knightpe October 28, 2009 at 2:13 pm

Well I had friends who were really cool and sweet to girls but as time passed they changed. They started hanging out with the wrong people and started thinking and talkting to and about girls in wrong ways. Since i didnt think the same way as they did they made fun of me and now im pretty much a loner lol. I still have some cool friends that any girl would be lucky to have, its just that most girls dont really go for the good boy, they go for the hot trouble maker. Thats why guys like us start off nice and sweet and innocent and sadly end up messed up. WRONG ANSWER October 28, 2009 at 2:14 pm I warned you,I told you what would happen if you pushed nice guys too far but you didnt listen.nice guys are sick of all the bs from you women,told you all that this was going to happen,nice guys are either becoming the so call bad boys that you women love or just living alone forever.but what do you care isnt this what you women want? My name is Richard Roma! October 28, 2009 at 2:39 pm Well maybe because my guy friends are really sweet all the time and I tell them not to be as sweet because it gets annoying and they take it as a reason to be jerks. Also because a lot of popular guys that get girls are jerks and guys think they should act like them to get more girls. Parker October 28, 2009 at 2:46 pm Well men tend to think with their you know what most of the time thats number one. Number two is that woman arent helping the situation. You have these girls that just throw themselves at men. So ofcourse.. guys in turn live off of the one night stands and push off loyalty and faithfulness. They would rather keep the cow at home and go out for the milk left at the door too. The problem rests on both sides: The no brained men and the ready and willing woman that throw themselves at Tom, Richard and Harry. ITS DISGUSTING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! No morals, no class, no respect for themselves or others!!!! This is why every other person you meet on the street is infected with HIV!

steeler nation!!!!!!! October 28, 2009 at 3:01 pm Im in the same situation. I think nice guys change themselves because they been told by articles on Yahoo! that bad guys always get the girls and, there right. I like this girl who is attracted to this bad guy. I guess were also sick of being walked all over. Tatiana October 28, 2009 at 3:59 pm Because girls are into the bad boy type of thing so as a teenager most guys turn into what they think girls want which if youve ever noticed there are tons of girls out there dating assholes and they always forgive them and let them come back L October 28, 2009 at 4:29 pm Because they are fustrated of girls rejecting them so they turn to being jerks in hoping to get girls. Those who stay true to their hearts and dreams will in turn get success. sleeples October 28, 2009 at 4:58 pm Maybe cause they got tired of being walked on/ not appreciated for being nice guys. ken October 28, 2009 at 5:29 pm SAMMIEs got it right. Hong Kong Rockdude October 28, 2009 at 5:54 pm I dont know why are good girls becoming sl*ts??? A sign of the times, maybe??? Bulldog October 28, 2009 at 6:04 pm

we all have our breaking points. Nice guys are only nice because they are weak. once they are not weak, once they know what power they have there is no more reason to be subserviant or nice anymore. Start giving me a little confidence and ill realize that you are a dumb who** and i could do better if i just opened up and wasnt so shy and insecure. I dont mean YOU you but a general you. I automatically win. October 28, 2009 at 6:37 pm Guys will be guys, and guys are idiots, they probably changed cause they like/liked a girl who like/liked jerks, fo real though thats to bad, sweet/nice guys are suppose to stay that way. Sorry to here that lol ~Just keepin it reall! ;D tina July 1, 2010 at 9:51 pm Listenyou dont know anything-girls LIKE nice guys-ok -do not turn into assholes because u think girls dont like nice guys -you are completely wrong I HATE ASSHOLES and have had my fair share of assholes and i can tell you right now i like nice guys i always tried to change my asshole bf;s into nice guys but it was an impossible task you guys need to just start asking girls out even if youre shy just do it Spiral August 25, 2010 at 6:01 am All I know from past experiences are that women are social workers. If youre a screwed up with a lot of hidden problems, youre a plus. Women will be all over trying to convert you into a nice guy. It gives them something to do, ya know? Theres nothing exciting about being with a nice guy that treats her good all the time. Crash Of Decade August 28, 2010 at 11:40 pm Listen. YOU dont know anything. It has always been this way. Women say they like nice guys, but its always been a bunch of horse shit. I know because I myself was a nice guy. I myself was a gentleman and I did *EVERYTHING* just for the sake of being a great person. What happened? Women happened. I was

always passed up. Me and all of my other friends who were also gentlemen. The only people who appreciated us were old people and babies. So I said screw that. I became a jerk. I started insulting i started laughing at mistakes. I became a jerk and now I have a different girl every month! Girls dont know what the hell they want. Never have, never will until they turn 36 and finally pull their ignorant heads out of their asses. The Jerk is the way of the future. The gentleman will always be laughed at, scarred, pissed on and left alone to rot in maddening loneliness. jose October 21, 2010 at 11:19 pm Nice guys do get laid. They just need a bit of confidence, or if they lack confidence Dutch courage helps. works for me. john Doe November 3, 2010 at 7:46 pm DAMN, crash of decade, you are so fuckin RIGHT !!!! Elfmagnet101 December 21, 2010 at 11:52 pm Its rare that the nice guy get the girl. Girls will say they want nice guys, but their actions say differently. Women are more attracted to guys who dont base their lives around them aka needy guys. Guys need to stop being nice and just be themselves. If a girl pisses you off, dont let her get away with it, tell her. All in all, girls want boys, and REAL women want men; furthermore, Im extremely lucky to have a hot little woman and not a little girl who plays games and is all talk. :D sonny January 3, 2011 at 3:50 am I think it goes both ways. nice guys want nice girls, but only if they have the body of a photo shopped playboy bunny or like sports or like a particular band just kind of like put together specifically (almost like the movie weird science). Good girls want nice guys with attitude and bite, but gentle but tough. I think as we get older, after kissing a couple of toads, we become wiser and see the true beauty and essence behind a persons persona or exterior features. Not to say

that every unattractive person is the nice one, but I think instead of wanting a chris evans looking guy, we might settle for a little geeky dude, or instead of wanting a girl with a size DD, we might end up dating the girl next door and a B cup. Being in high school, we are underdeveloped and most havent even experience anything about the world yet. dating in high school, dating in college, and dating in your elder years are all different because we are experiencing different wants and needs during those times. I think its fair to say that we all have stories of friend and ourselves of dating jerks. Why cant we just not like jerks? There are both guys and girls who are jerks. Just stay away from them. Bob Saget February 6, 2011 at 4:01 am Women try to be something theyre not. This started with all the womens rights crap and the feminist movements. It was a movement to give mans rights to women, even though most women arent designed to deal with the responsibility of these rights. Feminism caused women to forget that theyre designed to be caregivers rather than providers. Men are designed to do the heavy lifting and fight off the bad guys, but women wanted the right to do that too. Now that they have that right they need an even more manly man to top what theyve become. Essentially, I think feminism has killed femininity. Womens actions and talk has become more like mans, but theyre not designed to back it up. Their thoughts are more like mans, but their anatomy tells them to be the way theyre made to be. This has caused some women to be confused, and others to demand jerks. dave March 21, 2011 at 6:25 pm What a horribly unfair and one-sided game! What sane man would go through ANY of this? Mike James March 29, 2011 at 1:05 am Simply put, this could be a by-product of the femiNAZI movement, the effemination of men, stuff like that. Girls do want edgy guys, but will tire of that. Most girls grow up. Others dont. Sad fact, lots of the girls some of you HS and college (uni for the Euros) guys want and pine over will still be there as jumpoffs, bitter, angry, hate-filled This is the time for the nice guy to develop his life, his interior. This is NOT the time to pine over girls who hate you, those who despise

the fact that you are a right-thinking guy who ISNT some drugged-up fool who can score her her next dubsack Take it from a guy who knows and who has been through the wringer on this subject I been where you are it takes intestinal fortitude to become what you KNOW you can be, rather than settling to do what everyone else does. It takes guts to stand your ground and to be yourself, representing YOU to the fullest (now THATS keepin it real), no matter what the hottest trend is. Women want a man who can stand firm in the face of adversity.. these so-called bad boys are so effin soft, its a wonder why girls chase after them at all Take it from a guy who just got his dreamgirl (after years of struggling, crying, bad advice, etc) take it from a guy who is doing something with his life thats something else women LOVE- a man who is doingsomething with his life and a real man damn sure aint pandering to a woman. BELIEVE THAT I know how hard it is to break outta that I know for sure Dating is rough I married a nice girl (I mean the quintessential nice girl) she is PERFECT for me We are very very happy and I wanna let all the nice guys out there know that if you just stay who you are, be true to that, and disregard all the nice guys finish last crap, you WILL COME OUT ON TOP! My younger brother, who is a player is on his 3rd marriage, and is generally a POS Why change who you are to satisfy a fleeting thing? Why? Why be all hung up on this? Yall nice guys need to quit this crap be yourself do something in life in time, you will get to have the last laugh, as I am you will get to reject the ones who rejected you, as I am funny how most women dont give a damn about the man in a relationship- they just wanna cause the other woman some pain refuse to be a pawn refuse to take ANY shit from anyone I know all this stuff b/c i have lived it! Never be satisfied never be satisfied, yall Christopher Scott April 10, 2011 at 6:51 am Well said Mike James I agree with you. Dont give up on girls because there is one bad apple throw those bad apples away and dont let them slow you down move on and be yourself in the end they will lose while you get to laugh. Im glad Im a nice guy who makes good smart decisions because I know I will win in the end. Mike James April 10, 2011 at 9:48 pm One thing I can say, CScott, is that you have to decide to be happy. Pining over females who are shallow, self-absorbed and dumb will never win them over

to you or make your life better. Theres a reason why lots of these chicks end up the way they do. Like I did say last month, I BEEN THERE. Im in my 30s now (turned 34 in March), so I know I am a qualified man to tell everyone how it is Guys believe all this nonsense that they have to be an asshole to get girls Well, if youre looking for a one-night stand, yes The quality girls arent so easy. Its been said that the quality girls are like apples goota go up the tree to get em (which takes work). Also, the past 3, 4 generations of men/boys have been taught to behave like women, which never works. The solution is easy. Be yourself, refuse to be put upon by anyone, and refuse to settle for anything less than what you want in life. Let those girls who pass you over live their lives. I guarantee you they aint thinking about you. So why give any thought to them? Mike T April 14, 2011 at 6:59 am jose October 21, 2010 at 11:19 pm Nice guys do get laid. They just need a bit of confidence, or if they lack confidence Dutch courage helps. The classic retort from someone who doesnt get it. The nice guy asks why women dont want him because he cant figure out why. He obviously has the confidence to come to the conclusion that as he is, there is no reason for a woman to not want him (which is usually true). He has seen women date guys who have an extreme amount of fake confidence that women confuse for real confidence, and starts to adjust. Eventually, he says the only thing wrong with him is that women think he deserves to be alone, and he knows that isnt true, so he changes into an asshole and finds women are now much more attracted to him. Its called behavior modification. It is very powerful, and very, VERY easily explained. Mike James April 20, 2011 at 11:53 pm Behavior Modification. Ok Now, deep down, all men WANT someone to love them especially the BETAs among us. Also, we men DO have a conscience not all the jaded noce guys are gonna turn into a player, mimicking actions by players to get some action. Seriously, it is a point of view, but its flawed. I dare say that the nice guy really should view to enhance himself, and to BECOME the man he wants to be ON HIS OWN not to fake it til he makes it. he needs to taste the bitterness of failure.. because that will pass. He will be stronger if he

seeks to be stronger. He will be better if he chooses to be better. He will be loved if he chooses to be loved. PERIOD. Girl May 9, 2011 at 1:53 am I think that both men and women equialy go through the same pains and dissapointments in finding a right partner. Ive been there. But I would not advise any woman nor a man to seek a revange through hurting someone new who has nothing to do with the one who dissapointed you. Revange, holding a grudge and anger in a long run will corrupt you and cause only more pain in the end. Take a brake from dating, cry, scream, brakelet it out, but do not let it out on another human being. It took me few years to go back dating. I face the same dissapointments, but that is life. I deal with it more patiently now. If you cannot be happy by yourself and let the time heal the wounds, you will miss out finding the right one. Mike June 5, 2011 at 6:58 am Well said and I agree with Mike James. I just came across this site because of a recent argument with my girlfriend/love. Ive been known to be the nice-guy in HS growing up, while watching a lot of girls get hurt by the so-called jerks. I do believe women have started to abuse this word and define it as a way to vent or name call their partner. Its like the tip of the iceberg though, when you really piss them off. Some may use this title if their man didnt obey their direct order or truly hurt their feelings. Its up to the jerk to decide if he understands and agrees with her, into doing what he has to do to fix the problem right away. Sometimes this falls on both sexes though, where the male expresses his feelings of what shes done, but she is more kindly to brush off the problem and serenade you with I love you or other quick soft words. In all, I do believe most nice-guys strive to become a better man, while the so-called jerks are the ones who are tired of the B.S., things not adding up, or not coming to an agreement. True jerks are just careless and not trying to connect or talk about the problems in the relationship. Thanks to google, and letting me vent on here everyone. Mike June 5, 2011 at 7:12 am Forgot to add, the reason why the guys never asked you out in the first place, is probably because you were more in control of either what you want or didnt

actually give them the sign. Nice people usually attract nice people, so something doesnt sound right. It could be, they were true jerks since the start or you were mean towards themlol Wish everything balanced in this world, but it sometimes feels that evil weighs more into our relationships/surroundings over good these days. Michael June 24, 2011 at 1:20 am I seem to notice that many women do not want nice-guy, alpha males, who are confident, and will call them on their bs. ( i.e. the SPIRIT of every woman claims to want ) I dont think its because women WANT jerks, but they are even less interested in having their prejudices shattered. I notice about three types of guys, concerning women: 1) The type who does NOT understand them. 2) The type who does understand them, but uses them. and 3) The type who understands women, but does not like what they see out of women that is construed as hypocritical behaviors. I believe that not all men are alike; I also believe that not all women are alike. The difference is women seem to BEHAVE more uniformly than men do. I have not read through all of the comments, but I have a feeling that anything else that I can say has already been said 5 fold.

Youre A Nice Guy And Now You Have Been Dumped, Tips to Get Her Back Lets face it, if youre a nice guy, the odds are youre far more likely to get dumped. But heres the cool thing (theres a silver lining to anything). The cool thing is that precisely the things that make you a nice guy, are precisely the easiest to adjust and make her come back to you. What Im about to give you is a strategy that has worked for EVERY SINGLE nice guy that Ive given it to when they got dumped. The guys who thought it shouldnt work and ignored me, are to this day, years later trying to regain their girlfriends. The guys who listened to me and applied this strategy have all gotten back their girlfriend. Heres what to do. 1) Disappear As a nice-guy, this will be the hardest tip to apply. You will actually have to disappear for a while. What all the nice guys do, when they get dumped is they keep trying to win her back. They call her, they try being even nicer. They try to nice her into coming back. And it NEVER EVER EVER works. EVER! Here is what really works Do the exact opposite. When she dumps you, just disappear. Do not call her, do not text her, do not post messages on her facebook. None of that! 2) Become a Jerk No, not literally. But you will focus on something you thought were jerky. Actually decide to take some time away from HER, and dating in general. Actually decide to take a FULL 6-12 months and just focus on YOU. Decide you no longer need to make other people favors, focus on other peoples needs. Just focus on you for 6-12 months. Call it a cleansing period if you will. Focus on doing everything youve wanted to do for years. Get every hobby you wanted to, go travel to the locations you wanted to travel to. 3) Get a ton of new friends

Make it your goal to just BEFRIEND a whole bunch of hot female friends. Note, actually BEFRIEND. Im not talking about pretending to be womens friend in order to get their hot girlfriends, or befriend a girl hoping for something more. I mean actually become a cool guy with hot female friends And then befriend a bunch of cool guys. Even some badboys and jerks. Make a decision to make this your wildest year ever, where you meet and socialize with a ton of new people. What happens? What almost always happens, if you just push through that initial period of 2-3 weeks to maybe 1-2 months These new activities take over, and youre so into them, that its no longer a problem to not think of her, not call her, or anything like that. But how do you get her back then? At this point youre wondering how the heck this gets her back? Well what ALWAYS happens Is that you either bump into her somewhere, or she calls you. Most of the time, shes completely confused where you are and why you disappeared. She actually CANT BELIEVE she dumped a nice guy, and he didnt care to try to win her back. Within 1-2-3 months, she decides to call YOU! She calls you or facebooks you. But she find a way to see whats up with you and touch base. Guess what? Youre now a completely different guy. You have a ton of friends, a bunch of cool hobbies, and youre kinda jerky now. What ALWAYS happens is she starts trying to get back with you. ALWAYS. The key is pushing through the initial period and believing this works. You HAVE TO not call her. You need to just take some time off for yourself, KNOWING she will come back, and she always does. She either phones you, finds you somewhere out and about or such. It ALWAYS happens.

J Green April 19, 2011 at 11:47 pm I dont think this is right. Ive tried it and no, my attitude isnt piss poor, Im average to better-than-average looking, my attitude is OK, I havent called or stalked, and in general I showed a good amount of respect and displayed lots of

distancefor more than the time period referenced here. Some girls want to forget about you and some dont. Its all relative. I agree with the authors assertion that you shouldnt call or whine or try to get her back and to get on with your own life. But this is just prep for the lot of us that you cant count on those that stop talking to you. The author doesnt even address if you should be talking to these people anyways. But again, this concept is relative. Cory Winn April 20, 2011 at 4:09 am Hey Green, youre focusing on just one of the three elements. This ONLY works if you implement ALL 3. If youre seen around town with popular, hot girls She will seek you out and re-contact you. And theres the third element, which is that you need to become SELFISH. You need to stop trying to impress women, stop trying to appease and make them happy. Just become SELFISH and focus on building an amazing, cool, interesting life. If you do all three things, she will re-contact you. If you simply not contact her, while youre brooding in pain and walking around depressed, it doesnt work. So the dont contact her element does nothing by itself. You keeping distance out of respect communicates I wish I could contact you, but I want your approval and love so much, that Im not contacting you to not piss you off THIS DOESNT WORK. Thats why she dumped you in the first place. Worrying too much about what she wants. You need to keep distance because youre TOO BUSY HAVING FUN WITH OTHER WOMEN AND HOBBIES. Get it? Huge difference.

Why Women Dump Nice Guys, Tips On How To Get Her Back
Breaking up is something that all nice guys have to go through, unfortunately more than others. If you are a nice guy and have been dumped, you are probably wanting to know how to get her back. A nice guy possesses all of the qualities of a good boyfriend. He puts her first, he listens to her when she talks, he lets her do whatever she wants, and respects her more than anyone else does. Why do women dump nice guys? Because they are human doormats! Women want a guy that is not necessarily a jerk, but someone who will offer them somewhat of a challenge. It can be hard not treating her like royalty all of the time, especially if you love her, but women will sometimes mistake a guys kindness for weakness. It is a sad part of life and relationships, but it happens all of the time. If you want to get her back, then you have to act like you do not care about her. Developing a thicker skin is a part of the process. You are more likely to get her back if you create a slight change in your character and attitude. Instead of calling her and begging her back, just remain mysterious and dont call at all. Try your best not to think about her so much, and do things that keep you entertained and busy. The time that you are apart from her is the time that you can use for yourself. It is not that you have to reinvent yourself, there is nothing about you that needs to change except for your attitude toward her. There is a good chance that you just dont understand why she left you. This is something that nice guys often ponder to themselves. They know they did everything right, but deep down inside question what the real issue is. If you didnt cheat on her, was always there for her, etc., then the truth is that you were too nice. Some women will even

tell a guy when they break up that they were too nice. What is even worse is when a woman states that she sees you as a brother or a good friend. That is the ultimate sign that you are too nice. If you want to get her back, you are going to have to give this some time. She needs time to see that you are not as nice as she thought you were. If you really want to get her attention, do something that you wouldnt have done while you were with her like go out with a couple of your other platonic girlfriends or with the guys to shoot pool. Make sure she catches wind of it. Every time you see her, do not act like you are still in love with her. Instead, act like you notice her, but only a little bit. Carry on about your life and daily activities as usual. It is important to act like you are completely fine with the fact that you two are no longer together if you want to get her back. Dont worry, youll get her back, it may just take a little time. But once you do get back together, try putting yourself first sometimes. She needs to realize that you are not a living doormat and have needs as well as her. Let your presence be known. She will end up appreciating you much more and treating you like an actual boyfriend that she genuinely respects and cares about.

Say Goodbye to Mr Nice Guy and Start Attracting More Women

If youre here because youve finally found out that nice guys dont do it for women, then youre half-way there. You see, the biggest problem with defeating the ol Mr. Nice Guy think is to admit its a problem. Most nice guys will refuse to accept its not working for them, despite years and years and ton of evidence to the contrary. If youre here because you already know how nice guys finish Then youre half way there! What I want to help you out with now, is defeating mr. nice guy in you. In order to do that, you need to realize exactly why being a nice guy doesnt work, and what to do instead. The problem is most guys misunderstand why being mr. nice guy didnt work. They then tend to go to the opposite extreme and become assholes who annoy women to almost sadistic levels. You first need to know what being mr nice guy means, and what about it fails. Its not the nicety Or at least, when people say nice guy in a negative connotation, they dont mind that youre kind, giving, and charitable. Being kind, giving and charitable is not what makes women dump you or not be attracted to you. Let me ask you a question. If Brad Pitt opened a door for a woman, you think shed no longer like him? Of course not. Shed actually be smitten by it. Its not the actual nice-thing that makes guys unattractive, its the mindset behind it. If youre doing nice things to be liked and get approval, this is whats unattractive. If you crave and need for a woman to like you, then when you do nice things, theyll be seen as sucking up to her. I mean, Im sure youve had the same thing in

your life, right? Ever had someone be overly nice to you, and you could just TELL they wanted something? Like you could tell they were about to pop the request for a favor at any second? Thats what women feel around nice guys. Excitement, Arrogance and Confidence Research after research finds women are attracted to arrogance and even narcissism in men. Why? Well, women are biologically hard-wired to seek higher-status men. They are also programmed to find men of lower-status unattractive. The best indicator that someone is lower status than you, is if this person is constantly trying to please you and give you whatever you want. The best indicator someone is higher status than you, is if they dont care what they think NOW HERE IS THE KEY. You dont have to be mean about it! You dont have to go around and be a jerk. In fact, you can be kind and giving, and still be higher-status. A high-status person doesnt care what people think of him, but he treats them nicely and kindly. Its like a millionaire who smiles and shakes the waiters hand personally, and treats like he a close, personal friend. This is where you wanna come from with women. Like youre doing her a favor by being nice to her. Not being nice to her to GET a favor from HER. When you do this, you become Mr. Good Guy, and Mr. Nice Guy has officially been buried

Recovering From Being a nice Guy

Here is a nice article by some guy who obviously hasnt taken my secret quiz. The article is ok, it has some good points, and you might find it useful if you have already taken the quiz yourself. ========================= You have listened to her complain about the jerk who treated her badly countless times only to watch her go out with him again and again. All of your selfless acts fall to the wayside only to hear about her mistreatment the following week. You are left in pit of despair and confusing as the mantra nice guys finish last repeats in your head. When will she wake up? When will she realize that there is a nice guy who will treat her the way she deserves to be treated sitting right here? She will never realize this because you arent in fact a nice guy. Appearances can be deceiving and the nice guy act is one of the biggest deceptions around. On the surface, nice guys appear to be selfless, kind, caring human beings but this is far from the truth. Beneath their generous acts and humble words lurks something darker. A dark side few nice guys care to admit because nice guys arent really that nice. Here is a paraphrase from the book No More Mr. Nice Guy : Nice Guys avoid conflict. Nice Guys hold contempt for women. Nice Guys have difficulty making their needs a priority. Nice Guys lack conviction in their opinions or beliefs. Typically they will wait and see what the popular opinion is before taking a stand. If a rift happens in the group they will wait to see who is winning before taking a side.

 Nice Guys lack loyalty. They develop a chameleon like type of behavior when interacting with others. If one member of a group doesnt like another the nice guy will take on the belief of whoever they around. One day they will talk badly of one member and the next they will reverse their opinion. Nice Guys are dishonest. They hide their mistakes and say what they think people want to hear. They will say pretty much anything to gain the approval of others. Nice Guys are secretive. They are so driven to seek approval that they will hide anything they believe might upset anyone. Nice Guys are manipulative. They have hard time making their needs a priority and have difficulty asking for what they want clearly, so they feel powerless and result to manipulation. Nice Guys are controlling, in order to keep their world smooth. Nice Guys give to get and expect some kind of reciprocation. Nice Guys are passive-aggressive. Nice Guys are full of rage, a rage which tends to erupt at some of the most unexpected and seemingly inappropriate times. Nice Guys have difficulty setting boundaries, and instead feel like victims. Nice Guys are attracted to people and situations that need fixing. Nice Guys are terrible listeners because they are too busy trying to figure out how to defend themselves or fix the other persons problem. Nice Guys form relationships with partners who are projects or diamonds in the rough. And Nice Guys tend to swing back and forth between the nice side and the dark side. Reframing Being a Nice Guy If you have found yourself in any of these qualities odds are that you are a nice guy. While nice guys do have some redeeming qualities overall they lack mature emotional balance. Their overall theme in life is one of seeking approval. They want everyone to like them because on a fundamental level they dont like themselves. They

reach out for the approval of others because they arent content with their own. They want to be liked by everyone but the truth is that NO MATTER what you do NOT EVERYONE will like you. You cant please the entire crowd so its not worth the effort. There are some people that will despise you because of your desire to be liked. You are playing a game that you can never win. Every time you try to be a nice guy at the cost of your integrity or your honesty you are hurting yourself. It may be a small little lie or agreeing with something that you dont truly believe in but you are just making your situation worse. Honesty, integrity and courage are at the core of confidence and high self esteem. Every time you sacrifice one of these principles you are chipping away at your self esteem. Do this long enough and there will be nothing left. Recovering From Being Nice Guy The first step is to become aware of your nice guy tendencies. Awareness is half the battle in conquering any issue. You cant fix something that you dont know is broken. Be aware of every nice act that you preform and understand the real motivation behind it. Ask yourself did I do this just to be nice or to be liked? Did I put the needs of others above my own just for their approval? Was my nice gesture genuine or was it done with the intention of getting something in return? On a some level you understand what your motivation behind every nice act is. You know that you are doing it for approval. Your mind re-enforces these nice acts in two ways: 1. Rationalizing your behavior 2. Judges others for not doing what you do

The most common rationalization for your behavior that your mind will create is Im just trying to be nice. Every lie, manipulation and bending over backwards for people will be rationalized by this thought. A nice guy judges others for not being a nice as him. A martyr has a load of resentment towards people who dont do the things that he does. They create an arrogance and draw part of their self esteem from having a better than you type of attitude. If you look deeper into this judgment you will find jealousy. They are jealous of the people who have boundaries, arent self sacrificing for others and can get what they desire. They wish they could do the same but would run the risk of losing the validation they so desperately crave. If you look at how much a nice guy judges a jerk you will see mass amounts of jealousy. He judges him for the way he treats the girl but in reality he wishes he could have her. He cant be with her so he resorts to bitterness and taking a holier than thou route. The second step is to drop this habit. This step can be very difficult because some of you have been a practicing nice guy behaviors for most of your life. The external validation that you receive from others can become very addicting. Here are some ways you can put an end to this nice guy act: -Start saying no to people. Write out a list of things that you do simply because you want to be liked and stop doing them. You should end up saying to no to people far more than you say yes. Its not wrong to do for others but only if its done on your own terms. Help people out but only if you truly want to and without the expectation of getting something in return. -Get your priorities in line and never break them. The needs of others should come fourth on your list of priorities below your health, integrity and your mission.

-Make honesty and integrity a priority above being liked, it will help you sleep better at night. Become more open with your opinion and more upfront with people. -Learn to draw your self esteem and approval from within. Being liked by others isnt a bad thing but it becomes one when its your only means of feeling good about yourself. -Develop a spine and start to stand up for yourself. Its impossible to truly love yourself and draw self esteem from within if you are letting people walk all over you. Every time you let someone treat you badly your self esteem drops just a little bit more. -Adopt the frame of hey, Im not for everyone. Get used to the fact that whatever you do not everyone is going to like you. Its ironic that once you let go of trying to get people to love you the more love you will draw into your life. -I trust the universe to supply my abundance and prosperity That nagging voice in the back of your head will be right when it tells you that being more authentic and honest will cause most of your friends to go bye bye. They will be upset over losing their doormat and nice guy friend who will do anything for them.Get over it and trust the universe to supply you with friends. There will be a transition period were you will you lose a good bit of your friends. By weathering the grace period you will allow better and more genuine friends to come into your life. You will be filled with more abundance than you can handle. You will be taking a large risk by dropping the nice guy act. It may feel safer to keep things just the way they are. If you are satisfied with the fact that the only time a woman gets wet around you is when she is crying on your shoulder then I suggest that you continue on that path. But if you arent happy with your life or your success with women then I think its time for a change.

Dating Mistakes Guys Make Avoid Them & Find the Women of your Dreams
Here is a nice article by some guy who obviously hasnt taken my secret quiz. The article is ok, it has some good points, and you might find it useful if you have already taken the quiz yourself. ========================= So you are dating, looking for that special girl? Well there are some basic errors you will have to avoid. Guys make these mistakes all the time, and lose the girls they might have had, dont make them and get the girl of your dreams. You are not an expert (if you are reading this), so seek help. Talk to other guys, get their point of view. Speak to lady friends if you have any. Dont be afraid to show that you are not a Don Juan. If you are having trouble, help is surely there. Ask for it! Learn to read the signs. Most guys dont understand body language, or really, a womans signals. Dont make this error. There are many books, and articles such as this, that can show you what a woman is saying without words. Dont be a passive male. This is one of the worst errors you can make while dating. Youre a guy, be a guy, and stay on top of the situation. If you are passive, you turn off the lady faster than you might even believe. This doesnt mean being a macho. It means, being yourself, and active, thinking, even sensitive, man. Not enough good looks? Not enough money? This is basic error number 1. Obviously there are lots of ladies who are interested only in money or muscle, but do you really want a woman like that? You should know that most marriages and relationships based on material or physical issues only end as fast as they begin. If you are

attracted to a particular lady and you sense she is after only money, stay away. If you think she is attracted only to muscle, she is a bimbo. Really stay away. You are who you are, if that is not good enough, then the lady in question does not matter at all. Not understanding the chemistry of love. Ladies may be attracted to your DNA combination with theirs (as a potential mate). Their brain can interpret the smell from vast distances. This is a little understood part of the human condition, but you can be sure that all women have built in instincts, concerning their nesting partner. This is worth real study if you are serious about dating. Moving too fast. Take it easy!! What are you doing proposing for marriage after your first date? What a turn-off. Just relax. The moment will arrive later for you to express your feelings. Women will think you are a simpleton or worse by declarations of love after too short of time. Santa Claus Syndrome. Gifts all the time, may seem correct to you, but too many and too soon is also a turn-off. It will show to the lady you are trying to buy her. A bought woman is called.whats that word again? Mr. Nice Guy. Wow!! Now here is a classic error. Its true she is looking for Mr. Right, or Mr. Whatever, but Mr. Nice Guy ends up her buddy. You want a friend or a girlfriend. Decide. You must be polite (at all times), and you must be correct in your speech and actions, but not to extremes. Like the ancient Greeks used to say, pan metron ariston , put a measure to all things, and that means also in your overall attitude to your relations with the lady. Dont also be afraid to fail. Win some loose some is a great motto to adopt when dating. Should you follow the advice above, you will need to know all about getting intimate with your partner.

Nice Guys do Not Have to Finish Last How to Avoid the Pitfall of Trying to Please Everyone
Here is a nice article by some guy who obviously hasnt taken my secret quiz. The article is ok, it has some good points, and you might find it useful if you have already taken the quiz yourself. ========================= It is a mistake that we face in regular life. It is also a problem that can affect businesses of any type, especially the small business. When you try to please everyone, you will find that it is impossible, and you will fail. Along the way, you could very likely cause your business to fail. When you own and run a small business, then you most likely feel like you need to make everyone happy, from your customers to other businesses to employees to vendors. Unfortunately, you cannot make everyone happy. There will be people who are dissatisfied. You are bound to have a customer or two who thinks you charge too much or who feels that they were not treated with enough respect. You are bound to have employees who, at times, become frustrated with you or their coworkers. In addition, you are bound to make vendors and suppliers unhappy as well. Owning a small business means that you have to find a balance in all things. You must balance sales and operations, profit and feasibility, and happiness and professionalism. You probably think that, if everyone is not happy, then how can you run a successful business? While you do want people to be pleased with your business, you must also recognize that trying to please everyone all the time is a definite pitfall.

When you try to please everyone, you may be tempted to use money as a heal-all. You may be tempted to provide every unhappy customer with free sales or deep discounts, and every unhappy employee with big bonuses. You will quickly find that doing this all of the time can be detrimental to your business finances. How can you avoid this problem? First, you will have to accept that someone will be unhappy. You are sure to displease a customer, an employee, or even another business owner from time to time. This does not mean that you are not running your business well. It may not even be something that you did. You will have to be accepting of the fact that this will happen. Next, you will have to know how to handle displeasure. Understanding that people will not always be happy with you means that you will be able to face the problems. When it comes to customers, you will want to try to make them happy by working to reconcile the problem. However, you cannot spend so much time trying to make everyone happy that you damage your relationship with others. Often, spending all of your time trying to make everyone happy will eventually make someone very unhappy because they will be neglected. When you own and run a small business, you will have to watch out for falling into the trap of trying to please everyone all of the time. It is impossible and you will only cause your company more problems.

Nice Guy Syndrome!!?

Some dude from yahoo answers had a cool question. Now, its obvious he hasnt taken my secret quiz, but ignore that, and focus on his question, and how I answer it. Question: No, I am not suffering from teh nice guy syndrome, if there is such a thing but I just feel that girls/women deserve more, even if they do not feel the same way now, trust me later on when they get a little older, they will look back and feel totally different unless. Forget, No I ma not a female but I do have 3 sisters 3 older and one younger, so I have been abvle to pick up on alot of the things the guys have used to get the two older ones but has any though like this, (no it is not a new way of thinking, it has been stataed before), if a girl would be your friend with benefits, then how many other guys could he be doing things with? Or for those who think that is cool, then what if she is messing with someone who does not know but has something that he got from another friend with benefits? Answer: Dude, I have no idea what your question is? Is this a question, or is this a fumbled up rant? Lol, I have NO idea what youre asking. Are you asking why girls dont go for nice guys? Or are you stating how they wise up as they get older and do go for the nice guys. Ill just comment on that last one. Women do not wise up as they get older, the settle. They no longer can get the jock, so they settle for nice-guys they can boss around.
purpose7 December 29, 2009 at 2:50 pm Friends with benefits are bad news as far as I see it, for the reasons you mentioned and a few others. For me lovemaking is the ultimate symbol of love and caring that you can show a person and not just something fun to do on a Friday night. There are just too many risks involved, risks that could change your life forever. The safest bet is to only go to bed with someone you truly care about and will have no regrets should something happen. moviesgu December 29, 2009 at 3:27 pm Thats why casual sex is risky, both physically & emotionally. FWB deals can end nasty because feelings can develop and get hurt when the reality that the other person

doesnt feel the same way. These relationships dont have any commitment, so theres no need for honesty. phoenixm December 29, 2009 at 4:10 pm No girl should settle for a friend with benefits unless she just wants the benefits to. Men can be jerks but so can the women. I am a women and I have a heard of a LOT of sleazy tricks the girls pull to. hummingb December 29, 2009 at 4:12 pm friend with beanies is stupid comet and enjoy reccmike December 29, 2009 at 4:28 pm Continue to treat the women the way that you are treating them, with respect and like a lady. You know how to treat a woman because you are in a family full of women. There is nothing wrong with the Nice Guy syndrome. colleysh December 29, 2009 at 4:45 pm Too confusing I am not sure what you are asking Panthere December 29, 2009 at 5:00 pm I think there is such a thing, as nice guy syndrome. As for the friends with benefits Alot of people do it, and it is possible for there to be 2 or 3 of these type of friends at any given time. Mike James August 29, 2011 at 4:40 am no such thing as nice guy syndrome that is some made up crap to make HS and college guys who cant get dates buy worthless books about girls and techniques to get some poon dave September 9, 2011 at 3:48 am Fell into a life without women when I was just so bad at it. No, I did not feel that anyone owed me anything nor that I was entitled to a womans attention. I just came to understand that I would never survive in a life full of these horrible games. Some people must enjoy it, or it would never last.

How Do I Get Further Then The Nice Guy Image Around Girls?
Some dude from yahoo answers had a cool question. Now, its obvious he hasnt taken my secret quiz, but ignore that, and focus on his question, and how I answer it. Question: hey im 17 and single. I am always told by girls that i am a really nice guy but that is as far as it goes and i almost feel like its that nice guy image that is holding me back. any advice? Answer: Dude, its not your nice guy image thats holding you back. Thats just a lie girls tell to let you off easy. Being nice is not the problem The problem is not being sexy, and not having an edge to you. When they say oh youre such a nice guy What theyre really saying is Im not attracted to you, but you really are a nice guy, so I bet some other girl will like you. So the solution is not to not be nice (or a good person), the solution is to focus on building yourself and your confidence with women up. Become something more, focus on becoming GREAT at something. Become a great guitar player, or manage a local club, or focus on having a passion and interest in life. This is what TURNS ON women more than ANYTHING else. This is what gives you that edge. Its when you get to that point in life where OTHER STUFF interests you SO MUCH, that you dont have time for girls. I mean youre still nice to them, and you dont act bad on purpose, but you dont have time to be everything to them. When they ask you for a favor, you go Mmm, I got an important training session today, cant miss it sorry, not because youre being an ass on purpose (which is what badboys do), but because you GENUINELY have a higher passion than girls in your life. JWT December 24, 2009 at 5:30 pm Some guys are too good at being a friend in need. Always there with a shoulder to cry on and an ear to spill her heart out to. The problem is then you become more like a close friend instead of a romantic possibility.

Learn to flirt and joke around but dont be so available every time she wants someone to talk to. Dont return every single text and phone call right away. Being a little hard to get will actually make you more attractive. Lexxy December 24, 2009 at 5:47 pm You can try different girls. Some girls dont like the nice guy image. But some do. Also, saying youre a really nice guy is one of those ways girls try to let you down easy. So take it with a grain of salt. In my own personal experience, I used to hear this more when I was pushing too hard in a situation that a part of me knew wasnt going anywhere. This was kind of hard for me to take. I wanted those magic words that would make certain girls like me. But the painful truth was, its not magic. Some girls like you and some dont. When they do, its not rocket science to get a date with them. They do most of the work and you just ask at the right time. If they dont, itll seem like an impossible feat and youll wonder what it takes to get a date. LG December 24, 2009 at 6:14 pm Try to be goood not nice :-) Answer mine: http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;_ylt=Ai66cg9bo7IrgoPkzJb1ednsy6IX;_ ylv=3?qid=20090531125324AAYxPOz&show=7#profile-info-sNxQFQRAaa Mike James August 29, 2011 at 4:38 am People, understand this. there are more women than men today. Why waste time with anyone who doesnt want you- when there are too many women out there also looks fade, we all get old. By the age of 35, most people have lost their star status of youth (when popularity counted) life has a way of smoothing things out, especially in this area.

Why Do Nice Guys Finish Last With Girls?

Some dude from yahoo answers had a cool question. Now, its obvious he hasnt taken my secret quiz, but ignore that, and focus on his question, and how I answer it. Question: Something youve probably heard before. But why do the nice guys always end up not getting the girl Answer: Well, a more true statement would be why do nice guys finish last, because thats a bit closer to the truth. They dont end up not getting the girl, they get the girl after shes been with every bad-boy in town, haha

But seriously dude, the reason that nice-guys dont get the girl, is why nicegirls dont get the guy as often as HOT GIRLS. You see, when we say nice guy, in society, in general, we dont use that word for any person whos ever nice, or at all nice. We use that word SPECIFICALLY for desperate, unattractive guys who use niceness as a way to overcompensate for not being attractive. Its not the niceness that makes him unattractive, its the opposite its his being unattractive that makes him hyper-nice. Its lot a lot of fat girls, youll notice are super friendly, and super nice to guys. Its a way to get a guy despite being fat, theyre overcompensating. So heres the good news When I say attractive, and unattractive Im not talking genetics or biology here, you dont need to get cosmetic surgery if youre a nice guy lol What I am talking about is how you act and how strong of a person you are. Most nice-guys are guys who arent really superconfident or very charismatic. And these are all things you can develop. The badboy is a guy with an edge to him, he takes risks, he has passions and a drive in life, and does things outside of trying to impress women, in fact, he doesnt care about impressing women. Thats whats hot (attractive), trying to impress women, and trying to get them to like you is unattractive.

capablan December 19, 2009 at 6:01 am I ended up with the girl! And Im the nice guy. Lol But i do look good too and the other guy was hideous so X X No they dont always end up last. Just maybe your not what they are attracted in. Maybe the other guys nice and your just jealous and think hes not because he has her and you dont, O.O possibly? Bracket December 19, 2009 at 6:41 am Depends what nice guys youre talking about. I dont believe nice guys finish last. This is just an amercian saying. I have another one that says: Good guy gets 2 girls. Im serious didnt make it up, but I think the problem is also that they dont grasp the moment. I always used to sit at the corner and not socialize very much (like that previous girl mentioned), and would wait for them to talk to me first. When they would though I always knew how to talk cause that was my comfort zone you know. Ive seen many of this outgoing , talkative guys, that most of the time turn out to be just motormouths, and girls realize that. The problem I think is to be patient, wait for the girls, but also grasp the moment, and dont overeact. AdrianAP December 19, 2009 at 6:43 am Women watch too much TV and create a fantasy where they believe they can break the outer core of this tough guys heart. That one, special girl will make him experience love. When in actuality, this guy is an ******. I am always attracted to nice men. As long as it is genuine and they arent just being nice in order to get women. Really sweet, sensitive men are such a turn-on! I hate it when men are so friendly and sweet that ALL of the girls flirt with them on a daily basis, though. Lol Yolkie December 19, 2009 at 7:06 am because the girl is usually gorgeous and waaaay out of their league. 95% of the time, nice guys are hideous looking roaches with unbelievably high expectations. Only the elite 5% can bag the really hot ones. Joe L December 19, 2009 at 7:12 am

because women are idiots!!!! we are programmed to like the utter B*****DS.Really. Im trying to tell the diff between the good and the bad, some seem nice and turn out to be Knobheads. I can wait to find a really nice honest guy..Nice guys, please be more confident! Bad guys are, and thats why we fall for bad guys! zuliegir December 19, 2009 at 7:14 am for some reason girls like a mystery. the bad boys are unpredictableor so they seem. the nice guys seem to be predictable. its part of the intruge.girls like that kind of thing. they like to be persued and feel like they are special. thing 2 December 19, 2009 at 7:16 am cause, most women like a challenge and most nice guys are to easy, so as soon as you start to ignore us or what not we usually will go after the nice guyyou can see this example in many movies. Tatiana marine Wife December 19, 2009 at 7:21 am They have no confidence or self esteem. They are too whiny. They are quick to blame other guys but never acknowledge their own flaws. They sit in the corner or stand there without socializing. They dont try. -Couldnt say it any better if I tried Jenn! say_what December 19, 2009 at 7:29 am They have no confidence or self esteem. They are too whiny. They are quick to blame other guys but never acknowledge their own flaws. They sit in the corner or stand there without socializing. They dont try. Jenn December 19, 2009 at 8:12 am probably because some girls like guys with a dark side they like the bad boys some like nice guys but they want the nice guys to have a little bit of a rebel side to them lovestom December 19, 2009 at 8:19 am i dont know! it seems pretty stupid to me though, i mean they are the nicer one right? i guess some girls like the mean rebel type? idk!

Claire M December 19, 2009 at 8:23 am Because Some Girls Suck :) Dont Worry One Day A Perfect Girl Will Come Along And She Will Love You For Who You Are. VampireG December 19, 2009 at 9:02 am cause the girls are into the bad boy. ashleyad December 19, 2009 at 9:30 am they are so called ******* unfortunate but true Scarlet F December 19, 2009 at 9:43 am Because you said it yourself.. Their girls.. not Women. Notinter December 19, 2009 at 10:35 am Theyre thought of as more of the friend type..and not thought of as someone the girl would wanna be with. maddie December 19, 2009 at 10:53 am Alls fair in love and warmeaning go all out no matter the conciquences. r.s.p.b. December 19, 2009 at 11:41 am old old story, man .females think nice guys are nice.but bad assed, sexy guys are nicer . Mike James August 29, 2011 at 4:35 am Life has a way of showing people whats what Nice guy, bad boy whatever. The heart wants what it wants

Bad Boys vs. Nice Guys: Which Do Women Prefer?

If you ask a woman what she prefers. Most women will say theyre looking for a nice guy. Yet you will most often see these same women in the arms of bad-boys. What gives? Are women lying? Not really, no. It has to do with the question. You see, often time women answer questions from the perspective of a long-term mate. So if you ask her what kind of a guy she likes, she will go on describing a guy shed like to get married to. She is not describing whom shell have a one-night stand with tonight. In fact, the guy she hooks up with tonight can be nothing like the guy she described as being her ideal. Reason Number Two A difference in what women mean when they say a nice guy and what self-described nice guys are. When women say theyd like to meet a nice guy, its nothing like the nice-guys who call themselves nice guys. What a woman means by Id like to meet a nice guy is Id like to meet a hot, attractive manly man, who also does nice things for me occasionally. She does not mean Id like to meet a spineless wuss who doesnt have character and is always running around trying to please me and get me to like him by doing me favors and kissing my butt. Yes thats what most nice guys do. They think theyre being nice guys by kissing up to women and having no personality or character of their own. And thats just sad if you ask me Reason Number Three

There is also some dishonesty on the part of women too. The part women are dishonest with themselves about is indifference. A lot of women wont admit it to themselves, but theyre more sexually attracted if a guy is more unavailable or harder to attain. Bad boys only care about their own needs, and dont care what a woman thinks. Theyre indifferent to what she thinks or getting her approval. This is what makes them hot. Women are biologically hardwired to be attracted to a bit of arrogance, as this means the man is of high-status. Now, the ideal for you is not to become a bad boy. But get best of both world. Become a little selfish and confident. Make it hard for her to get a hold of you, be busy, have a life, have other interests But when you are WITH her, then you are THE nicest guy you can be. Do you get this? You give her the badboy and the nice guy in one package. And that to a woman is the ideal man.

What Is More Attracting To You Girls A Gangster, Hustler, Or A Nice Guy ?

Some dude from yahoo answers had a cool question. Now, its obvious he hasnt taken my secret quiz, but ignore that, and focus on his question, and how I answer it. Question: I want to know if girls are more attracted u to gangsters, hustlers or maybe a guy who is nice to them all the time? Answer: Im not a girl, but Ill give you a more straight up answer Let me give you a counter-question. Are you more attracted to porn stars, coke-addicted strippers or a nice, homely girl? Its a weird question right? It kind of depends. If you want to have wild sex, youll take the coke-addicted stripper any day over the nice girl. If you want someone to hang out with, take long walks with and/or be in a relationship with, youll take the nice girl. Its the same with girls dude. The nice guy is the equivalent of the unexciting, not especially sexy, but nice geeky girl So it depends really. erica December 10, 2009 at 5:11 am Nice guy all the way we girls like to feel special and thats the way to do it we find it VERY attractive :) Tayyxo December 10, 2009 at 5:17 am I like nice guys.

CuriousG December 10, 2009 at 5:19 am Well me personally I like the guys that dress like Gangsters has a Job that pays like a hustler but has to be respectful to females. star_lit December 10, 2009 at 5:22 am a nice guy. Mike James August 29, 2011 at 4:30 am If the girls like the hustlers, gangsters, etc then they get to deal with all the stuff that comes with that lifestyle. Its well-documented, so I wont bore you with it all. Besides, its not about what makes sense when it comes to this topic its all about what they like and want in any case who cares its their life if they wanna have a guy they will have to share with multiple females (and other guys once incarcerated)

How Does A Nice Guy Face Rejection?

Some dude from yahoo answers had a cool question. Now, its obvious he hasnt taken my secret quiz, but ignore that, and focus on his question, and how I answer it. Question: Im sure its happened. The nice guy ends up finally risking it all and saying how he likes his friend. Well we all want to say, Aww, how sweet and they end up happily ever after. But its not usually the case. How is a nice guy who finally builds up that courage to just say his feelings supposed to recover from Youre a good friend talk while she goes to date some jerk? It doesnt make sense. Do girls want the nice guy or what? Answer: Sure, girls do like a Nice Guy They dont like a spineless wussie who pretends to be nice, and pretends to be her friend so he can try to get in her pants. Its not a friend being nice that makes her give him the friend things. Its that women have no respect for men who dont have the balls to express interest right off the bat. Those stories about a guy and a girl being friends for years, and then one of them expresses interest, and they live happily ever after, are they true? YES THEY ARE But those are a case of those two being REAL FRIENDS. Like hes really friends with her, just the same way he would with a male friend. Hes not pretending to be her friend and kissing her butt hoping it turns into something one day. They are genuinelly genuine honest-to-goodness close friends and one day they develop feeling for one another. LG December 3, 2009 at 6:15 am

WELL IM GONNA BE HONEST WITH YA IM 34 AND THIS HAS BEEN MY EXPERIENCE ALL GURLS USUALLY WANT THE SORRY MEN THAT ARE NO GOOD THIS IS A FACT WHILE THEY WILL LET THE GOOD ONES SLIP RIGHT ON BY BUT AFTER YEARS OF MISERY I WOULD SURE APPRECIATE A GOOD MAN NO DOUBT BUT IT TOOK ME 34 YRS TO FIGURE OUT THAT GOOD MEN ARE HARD TO COME BY blakrazo December 3, 2009 at 6:24 am Remember, rejection is painful but not deadly. How does a nice guy face rejection? Like anyone else, say ouch, that hurts and then move on to the next girl. Heres something thats bad news and good news, its not rocket science, if the girl likes you youll feel it. You dont have to ask her. And if youre hot for her, itll take about 30 seconds for her to figure that out without you having to do much at all. Its bad news because if you dont feel that electricity youve got a snowballs chance in hell of getting a positive response when you ask her for a date or share your feelings. And you realize just how many girls there are that dont want you. Its good news because it means you dont have to fight for magic words or figure out ways to act to get a girl to like you. You can just relax and be yourself and have a great time getting to know someone and spending romantic moments together. Its good news because it means you can trust your feelings. Its good news because it means you dont have to go in and embarass yourself if all your feelings are telling you this is a bad idea. If you dont feel that electricity you can quickly move on to the next girl. The more girls you try, the more likely youll meet someone with whom you share mutual attraction.

Remember, that a rejection(and if someone likes you too) says NOTHING about your worth as a person. It only means that one person wasnt sexually attracted to you. And you can join the rest of the male population who cant get any girl anytime they want. You are who you are, and anothers opinion of you doesnt change who you are. Attraction is a complicated thing. It has to do with looks, body type, race, timimg, familiarity, environment, personality type, genetic programming etc. Some of these things you can control and some you really cant. And you may be just guessing if you think you know exactly what turns a girl on or why she didnt like you. SHE may not even know what turns her on or why she didnt like you. All she knows is she does or doesnt. In spite of what many romantic comedies may say, the best and/or most deserving guy doesnt always get the girl. richard brown October 4, 2010 at 11:00 pm fuck all that shit. Never works for me anyway. Its left me feeling a deep bitter hatred for all the cows thats ive shown an interest in. Im fed up being shit on and rejected by the girls i like, all for them to say your a nice guy! But!!! I say fuck off and stop quoting the stupid line that they all have learned from somewhere. Margie July 2, 2011 at 10:30 pm Your story was really informative, thanks!

Are You A Nice Guy?

So, you want to find out if youre a nice guy? And whats the big deal whether you are one or not? Well, read on as youre about be educated! First of all, one of the best tell-tale signs, is if you keep getting the oh youre such a nice guy line from women you like, but you never get together with. If youve heard this a few times, from women you liked You are probably a nice guy. Another tell-tale signs is if you resent guys who get a lot of women. Do you see guys who have lots of hot women, and think of them as jerks? Do you believe jerks get all the women? Then you are most likely a nice guy. Why? Because this belief is not true, and only correlated to the world view of a nice guy. A nice guy is basically a guy who has a warped view of masculinity. He believes that to be a good man, means to be lick womans butts and do things that women like. He believes that a guy who just gets a lot of women, has sex with them and leaves is bad. Well, that makes you a nice guy. The reason for this is that you do not KNOW women and female nature. What women say, and what they want are two completely different things. They say they want flowers, compliments and a guy who never looks at other girls. But is that true? Nope. Its only a built in biological mechanisms to get guys MORE committed. But if you commit a 100%, she is no longer attracted to you. A woman wants a man whos attractive enough to get other women. If shes with a guy, and she knows the guy cant get another woman to save his life, then he is unattractive. The evolutionary biology reason for this is If you are with a loser, your sons will also be unpopular losers. And this is why women are not attracted to guys who are too nice. Sure, she wants a guy to show some commitment. She wants a guy she knows wont go around and spread his seed around (too much) But she doesnt want a (nice) guy who has none of these traits. Because if he has none of these traits, then hes not a MAN any more. And women are attracted to MEN, not nice guys.

Whatever Happened To Nice Guys Getting Female Attention?

Some dude from yahoo answers had a cool question. Now, its obvious he hasnt taken my secret quiz, but ignore that, and focus on his question, and how I answer it. Question: Ok, Im university and Im just wondering, why do girls like the jerky, stuck-up guys? Cuz Im nice and I have decent looks (not the best, but Im not ugly), Im pretty athletic, and I treat everyone with respect, but still all of the jerks get girls? Do any other guys notice this? Answer: Welcome to planet earth, lol. Do you know why Jerks get the girls? Do you want the REAL secret? The secret is, that its not being bad that gets you girls, in fact, a lot of these guys that women call jerks are not really jerks, most of them dont beat up women, most of them do not treat women badly What they DO however do, is treat women like theyre nothing special. He doesnt kiss her ass, he doesnt try to impress her, and hes not breaking his back and giving up his life to be with her. Why is this so attractive to women? Because see What women are somewhat biologically programmed to be attracted to is a guy who has passion, a guy who has a drive in life, an ambition, dreams and a vision for his life. Someone who has a higher goal in purpose in life He doesnt dislike girls, but hes so focused on his higher goals that he doesnt care about girls that much. Whereas other guys treat her like a princess hell cancel a date with her if he has an important training or seminar coming up out of nowhere. Shell of course call him a jerk and complain to you that hes an asshole coz he went to his seminar instead of going on a date with her But the truth is, that IS the reason she IS with him. Because having a life outside of women is HOT. So, you need to become a Jerk And when I say Jerk, I dont mean the REAL definition of a jerk (the bad, manipulative person who hurts others on purpose) I mean the label women use for guys who dont kiss up to them. Start treating

women like human beings (the same way youd treat a male friend), and two things will happens. 1) Shell label you a jerk 2) Shell be infatuated with you
Will K November 28, 2009 at 1:50 pm Not all girls are like that. Its usually the nice girls that like the nice guys and want to be treated with respect. Since you are in high school a lot of the girls no nothing about relationships and what type of guys they should go out with. But definitely in the future the girls will appreciate your kindness :) Karen November 28, 2009 at 2:03 pm Its not that they dont like nice guys its just that the type of girls who are into nice guys dont make it obvious. Pay attention to the shy ones. Avinash November 28, 2009 at 2:32 pm Its sex appeal. Theres something undeniably sexy about bad boys. Dont worry though, eventually we will all grow up and want the nice guys who treat us right and truly have feelings. Avinash November 28, 2009 at 2:57 pm im going to be a freshman too:) um certain girls go for jerky stuck-up guys because they are hot and might be popular but in the end they get dumped most of them Purple November 28, 2009 at 3:16 pm i dont. i like nice sweet guys and ur athletic too id date u im a 7th grader but id date u have to see wat u look like first though katie.w0 November 28, 2009 at 3:30 pm nice guys have the reputation of being boring Amanda November 28, 2009 at 4:15 pm youll get it in the long run, thats all that matters.

Are You A Nice Guy?

Really guys, why women dont like nice guys? Because they are too nice. Guys today are just too nice and too good. Some guys are jerks, and they have lots of women. But I dont recommend doing that. If you are a nice guy there are good news for you. You can be nice and still get women. A woman will go out with you any day if you satisfy her sexually like no other guy has. You can throw all your nice guy manners out the window if you dont know how to provide good sex to a woman. For women great sex is crucial. A womans nightmare is a guy that is nice and frigid. Thats an absolute disaster. You must learn how to be a great lover. The only way out of 0 zero women life is that you start using time to sexually educate yourself. Start going on yoga and tantra classes. Start reading sex book. Woman will never be satisfied with you if shes not sexually satisfied first. You dont have to be bad boy in society, be a bad boy in the bedroom. Dont let shy women fool you. Maybe you think that they are not so sexually active and demanding. Well, start fooling around with them and then you will see who is shy. Shyness is just a cover for her inner kinky slut. For permanent success with women and dating you should start learning every technique for satisfying women. Learn orgasm control and the art of oral sex. If you study just these two things women will be grateful to you forever. A great lover is always wanted. Think Casanova. I mean what else should I say. Amazing lovers are the ones that stay carved in a womans mind forever. Do you want to be one of those guys or do you want to be like the every other nice guy. Think about it.

Why Do Nice Guys Finish Last? Here Is What You Must Do In Order To Avoid Being One Of Those Guys
I know that you really dont like to hear the dreaded truth, but its the truth. Nice guys finish last, deal with it and accept it. They always try so hard to keep the girl interested and in the end they fail miserably. The other way is that they do all kinds of stuff for a girl and they secretly hope that one day she will begin to love them. Never! They will be her runaround friend forever. They use manipulative tactics and in the end they feel bad when they end up manipulated into friendship they dont want. If you are one of those nice guys then quickly read this and start implementing the knowledge before you are forgotten by women forever. Nice guys offer zero challenge to women, they walk around the woman and do everything she says. That is not a challenge. Nice guys are just too passive and women walk all over them. The simplest thing you can do to fix that is not starting to act like a jerk. Just simply respect your personal boundaries,when a woman ask you something you dont want to do say that you wont do it. Its simple. You may loose that woman, but what is more important for you self-respect or pussy? Another thing, I know that you are unhappy being on your own. You think that woman will come with some magic stick and solve all your problems. No she wont, even if you manage to start a relationship with a woman the relationship high will keep you for month or two.. Then everything will revert to normal, or worse. First, fix your life then seek a mate. It does not go other way around. Stop putting so much expectations and value on the women and start putting value and expectations on yourself. You will be much better of doing that.

Guys isnt it a good term for nice guys when you hear nice guys finish last?
Some dude from yahoo answers had a cool question. Now, its obvious he hasnt taken my secret quiz, but ignore that, and focus on his question, and how I answer it. Question: Because the jerks only finish first because they cant keep anyone, where as the smart nice gentlemen finish last because the girl wants to stay with them and they want the girl. So i dont see why that would be a bad saying for nice guys. It should be bad the the bad guys. Cause no one wants a jerk thats so into himself and showing off to other people. Not to mention theyre the farthest thing from knowing how to be to a lady. Answer: Well, most guys are not even so aware that they are finishing last because they are nice guys. I know I wasnt aware of it at all. I thought I was superior to everyone else by being extremely nice. When you say that girls stay with nice guys, do you know the reason why they stay with them? They stay with them because nice guys usually do lots of favors for them and pay for pretty much everything. Of course the girl wants to stay with the nice guy, she can have a free doormat. That same girl wont even have sex with her nice guy most of the time. She goes and sleeps with jerks or men that are a better balance between the jerk and the nice guy. So, if most guys really knew the true meaning of nice guys finish last, they would definitely want to change themselves into something other than the nice guy. Better to be the jerk than the nice guy. The ideal of course would be a mature balance between the jerk and the nice guy, but those men are very rare and valuable.

Female stalker puts tailgate to my truck down every other night. What can I do?
Some dude from yahoo answers had a cool question. Now, its obvious he hasnt taken my secret quiz, but ignore that, and focus on his question, and how I answer it. Question: So the situation is my friends old roommate developed a crush on me and would hit on me every time I came over to hang out with my friend. At no point did I ever lead her on or imply to her that I would be interested in a relationship. Instead, I politely told her at first that she wasnt my type and that I am not interested in a relationship to spare her feelings. However, she continued to persistently hit on me and I more directly told her that It is not going to happen and it would be best for her to leave me alone because she is just digging her own grave. Sure enough she did not stop and ultimately she was kicked out of the apartment for this reason and several other cleanliness issues. She only moved several blocks away and I have been told that she has been asking around to try and find out exactly where I live so that she may stop by. She has not stopped by yet, however for the past several months every other night someone has been putting the tailgate to my truck down. Its not exactly destructive to my truck, but regardless it is creepy because I am fairly certain that it is her doing it. It is beginning to annoy me and I would really like for it to stop or at the very least to confirm that she the one who is doing it. Upon brainstorming with friends, the solution that we have come up with is to put some disgusting substance on the handle of the tailgate so that the next time whoever grabs the handle to pull the tailgate down will get a nice handlful of such a subtance. I was thinking either icey hot if it lasts long enough or grease. At this point, no more mister nice guy because I have really lost my patience for that stalking b*tch. Awesome answers! I dug out my old webcam and was able to find a free surveillance program that only records when it detects movement. I set up the camera with a birds eye view of my truck right from my window. Its

time to get to the bottom of this mystery with some cold hard evidence to go along with it! Answer: Well, it looks like you have a problem that many men would like to have, and I kid you not! Its obvious that your non interest has gotten her very interested in you. She has become a stalker and you want her to get away from you. Ok, so your plan that you have devised is not going to really do the thing. This is because you are reacting to her childish behavior with your childish behavior. The best thing to do in a situation like this is to find out where she lives, go up to her, knock on her door and tell her whats going on. The act of coming up to her door will show her you mean business. When you see her, just simply tell her the truth and tell her that you wont play her games and that she better stop it because it s going to get her nowhere. Dont be rude, just be honest and sincere. Telulater May 4, 2010 at 9:57 pm Why not put the tailgate down every night yourself and see if she puts it back up? You can always buy one of those game cameras they use to take photos of deer and hide it in the back window of your truck, that might work. Karle May 4, 2010 at 10:01 pm um would suggest putting in a camerasince u can get a cheap wired one for about 50 bucks or less.hook it up so that if covers the area ur truck is parked.then when she tampers with ur truck have her prosecuted for vandalism.

also icy hot wont work that well and neither will grease.if u are going to go this route buy a cheap ink pad for lik under 10 bucks from wal-mart and cut it up and stick it under th handle.would suggest u use rubber gloves when doing thisgood luck HotRodGuy May 4, 2010 at 10:24 pm Wheel bearing grease is hard to clean up but will do the job. Not sure exactly how much legal trouble it could cause, but double sided tape and fresh razor blades would be interesting to watch. Of course, you could just get a tailgate lock. Or screw with their head and take the tailgate inside with you. (most simply drop on and can be removed in less than a minute) Kenny May 4, 2010 at 10:44 pm Hit it, see how bad you are and then shell leave you alone. Jk Kentucky Frozen Chicken May 4, 2010 at 11:11 pm i say get a camera, and video tape this. note to Kenny: what did you say? i didnt quite understand what you said. all i heard was mumbling sounds. LOL. Kenny my favorite south park character, next to Starvin Marvin. JetDoc May 4, 2010 at 11:23 pm Lay down in the bed of your truck, and when she comes along to drop your tailgate, shoot her! Paul May 4, 2010 at 11:26 pm
Whats it hurting? ignore it and she will get bored one day and quit.

3 Ways to Blast Yourself Out of the Horrific Nice Guy Zone And No You Dont Have to Be a Jerk
Lets just be friends! This dreaded phrase is one of the worst nightmares a guy can hear. Especially when its said by a girl he wants to date. A guy is putting all the effort into this one special girl, and in the end she wants to be only friends with him. This usually happens when a woman wants to use you for your money or she wants you as an emotional support. This phenomena is commonly called as the friend zone. If you want to know how to get away from this Gods forsaken zone read on.. A big mistake guys always do is doing everything a girls tells them to do. Never do that, do only what you want to do. You should always be your boss, be a leader, not a follower. This applies especially to relations with women, you can not let a woman tell you what to do. Women are very attracted to guys who dont follow their commands, its like counter intuitive, but it works. Dont be available all the time! Again, many guys do quite the opposite and are available all the time! No, no, no. Big mistake. By being always available you show that you dont have a life of your own. Not having a life, is that attractive? You see its good to see her and spend some time with her, but not all the time. So if you must, just fake nonavailability. It will pay off. Let her know she is not the only one. Never make her feel she is the only woman for you. Show her that you have other options. By this you are showing that you are non needy. Always have other women by your side, so she will know she is not soo special.

Why Being The Soft nice Guy Always Gets You In The Friend Zone? Do Not Miss This At Any Cost
Really nice guys are very hard to find, and still they are the ones that get left behind. Are they only available now for friendship? If you want to find out what is happening read through this article. The nice guy is just too comfortable for a girl. - Nice guys always end up being a friend because they bond with a girl on a comfort level, not on a sexual level. And they simply become a close friend to a girl. An orbiter to be precise. The romantic feelings are overpowered by the need to have someone without the commitment of a relationship that is beyond friendship. Fear of being rejected. - You just like that special girl so much, but you are too afraid to admit your feelings to her. You need to let go of fear, and let your feelings known to her. You are just so nice, and by being like that you have closed down yourself. Said simply you are too heavily guarded. Sometimes you are just paralyzed by the fear of being rejected so you never admit your true feeling. Well sometimes, you should take risks. If you ask me, you should always take risks.. in everything. There is an old saying that goes like this It is better to die as a lion, than live a thousand days as a lamb Its never too late to let her know. Dont fall into the What if? or I should have type of mindset. If you have something to do with a woman, do it now! Being nice is basically holding back - For nice guy, it is better to hold back than saying what you have to say. Well this is one of the big disadvantages of being nice. Why do you think jerks get the girls, because they dont hold back. They speak their mind, sometimes in a very rude manner. And guess what, women love it! You hold back because you think it is not yet the proper time to say the things you want to say and then you realize its already too late. Ill let you in on little secret, with women never is the right to do everything. It sounds like a zen koan, because it is. Think it over. Be courageous enough to speak your mind. There are moments in life when we need to take that leap of faith. Whats important is that you are true in your intentions and that your nice guy behavior is just a way to her heart. Just love her and be strong.

For the girls, why does it seems that nice guys finish last?
Some dude from yahoo answers had a cool question. Now, its obvious he hasnt taken my secret quiz, but ignore that, and focus on his question, and how I answer it. Question: I can understand the whole confidence thing, but what about a nice guy who does have some confidence where he can take people handing him some grief, but at the same time be able to dish out to his friends. Even be able to dish it out on himself. Does shyness of the guy really make that much of a difference? Answer: YES YES and then YES. Its all about the shyness. You see, women dont really understand shyness in men. Lets imagine two twin brothers. With everything else equal in personality, except one is shy, and the other is cocky/funny/charming The latter will get laid at least 10 times more And thats no exaggeration. The reason? 1) Women dont recognize shyness in men A lot of guys out there say women dislike lack of confidence and even thought thats somewhat true, I dont believe its the MAIN reason. A lot of girls actually like shy guys. In fact, a shy guy could have a dozen girls who had a crush in his life time, but he never hooks up with them or anything like that. Why? Women have their own insecurities. When a guy is shy and uncommunicative, she sees it as rejection. I know that sounds weird, but if a girl looks over at a guy, and he doesnt come up to her and flirt she thinks shes rejected! I know, it sounds crazy. The guy is too shy to approach her, but she assumes he doesnt like her. Even if shes really confident and does the flirting first, the shy guy will be cold and unresponsive. The reason he doesnt flirt back ,is because hes shy But she thinks her flirting is being rejected. What does she do then? What any rejected person does they grow cold to the person (they think) rejected them. She actually grows cold to the shy guy because she think hes arrogant and cold to her! 2) To end up with a woman, you need to play the courtship dance

One thing thats a prerogative in our species is that there is a certain courtship dance. A big step in it is displaying sexual interest. A woman can rarely see you as a sexual being unless you are, and act sexual around her. Shyness represses this in shy guys. They act completely asexually around women. So when the shy guy after years of friendship professes interest -it hits her out of the blue. It literally is like a brother professing interest. Its weird, its this asexual being she was friends with so long.
drummer_chick_rox January 19, 2010 at 5:53 am i like shy guys more than the jerks ~CoWgIrL~ January 19, 2010 at 6:39 am to me its the nice guy personality and i like shy people because in person im shy myself, as long as you have confidence and if you want to dish it out just make sure you can take it. shyness shouldnt make a difference but some girls are outgoing and FAR from shy and would like a guy thats the same way but i think the nice guy, shy guy personality is goodotherwise they are normally jerks about EVERYTHING random goodguy January 19, 2010 at 6:53 am because they really do every girl here will say: I dont like jerks, I like nice guys however thats not true, its whats known as a 2nd moral they say what society wants to hear still there are some girls who genuinely like nice guys, but this happens usually when girls are mature enoigh, like in mid 20s, or 30s Joe L January 19, 2010 at 7:02 am

you dont really need a girl to answer this. Nice guys are uglyphysically. They finish last because they cant get pretty girls. There are tons of unattractive, nice females out there. Competition is fierce, though.

How To Pull Women Fast By Not Being Such A Nice Guy

If youve been on planet earth for any longer than a few years, youve noticed who women go for. Its rarely the nice guy, isnt it? Youve noticed how women tend to go for totals jerks, and completely ignore nice guys. What can be even more infuriating to a lot of nice guys is Shes sitting there, complain how there are no good guys, and youre RIGHT THERE, and shes looking past you. So, do you need to become a jerk to get hot women? No There is a way to use the bad-boys secret and still be a decent, good guy. You have to understand why it is that women go for jerks in the first place, understand the core of it and then apply it to yourself. You see, women dont go for jerks because they are jerks. It just so happens that jerks tend to be attractive. They tend to cause attraction in women. Shes literally forcing herself to overlook her jerkdom, because he is attractive. Let me give you an example. Would you rather be with an acne-ridden 500 pound nerdy (but nice) girl, or a bitchy, bitter, arrogant stripper that looks like a super model? Obviously the latter. Are you with her because shes arrogant and bitter? Of course not! Well, its the same thing with women and jerks. The thing is that nice-guys are not over-looked because theyre good. Theyre overlooked because they arent sexually attractive. Being nice doesnt compensate for not being sexually appealing. So what is it that jerks have that is sexually appealing? Well, several things: 1) They dont apologize for their sexuality. They dont ask women out with a sense of guilt. They proudly and boldly proclaim their sexuality and sexual interest in women. Theyre not afraid to say I like sex, and I

am attract to women sexually. Nice guys tend to hide it, and act as if they dont care about sex. 2) They have a life outside of women. Women are really hard-wired to be attracted to guys who are ambitious, driven, passionate and have a life outside of women. The single most-unattractive thing you can do around women Is to badly want a woman. I know it sounds counter-intuitive but women are attracted to a guy they have to seduce and win over. She wants to make HIM like HER. Thats how it is naturally. Men pursuing and impressing women is biologically-repulsive. Get a life outside of women, and let women chase you. 3) They dont care what others think. Now this is the tricky one. You can take this to a point where its arrogant and makes you a bad person, but you can do it in a good way as well. A guy whos just himself everywhere he goes is sexy to women. Its attractive when a guy isnt too concerned what people think. He just goes around and does his own thing. Now, jerks do this by stepping over other people and being entirely insensitive. But you can do this without stepping over other people. It simply requires that you put yourself first. You always do whats in your best self-interest, as long as its not hurting others. If people think youre weird, stupid, or wrong, you dont apologize for it. If you sign up for a class that everyone tells you is dumb, you dont start apologizing or excusing yourself. You respectfully disagree. Mike James August 1, 2011 at 12:11 am I must say this people are too freakin hung up on sex, popularity, all the things that are unimportant in life Men need to get back to being men a good start is by not giving a crap about what others think of them flies in the face of feminism and the the feminized, gynocentric culture we live in a man must be a nonconformist (and not merely acting like one in order to get some poon)

Tired of being mister nice guy! Moral dilemma??

Some dude from yahoo answers had a cool question. Now, its obvious he hasnt taken my secret quiz, but ignore that, and focus on his question, and how I answer it. Question: Ive always been the nice guy. but its always backfired as truelly said nice guys finish last and thats my motto. ok say you are not married no girlfriend and a woman you work with has a thing for you. you know because she flirts and chased you around when you first started at your job and then everyone told you. well problem is shes married. ive always been the nice guy and not done anything. but im starting to sway in my ways. i wouldnt be the one cheating. i would just be getting some tail at work. i know if i had her come into my office and made the first move we would have sex. i think im tired of coming in last. tired of mister nice guy. she wants me, im single, and i wouldnt be cheating. is it ok to be the rebel every once in awhile? can you be naughty and still be an ok guy? Answer: Yes you can. This is the middle-ground known as being an ok guy. You see, the reason nice guys finish last is because theyre not realistic. They always try to please and do the right thing and this is actually not genuine. Human nature is not nice Human nature also has naughty sides So we dont trust nice people as we know theyre bound to screws us over one day. People who are realistic have a few flaws here and there, they have a few naughty sides. So, to kill the nice guy syndrome, you need to accept that some drives and instincts are ok to indulge in. They dont make you evil, they just make human. You dont actually need to get laid with that chick Its enough to let go of the guilt. In other words, you need to make an objective decision. The reason youre not going to sleep with her is because married women are dangerous. You dont know when an angry husband will knock on your door at 3 am with a shotgun. So in other words, make decisions based on objective criteria, not niceness. Now, Im not saying dont have morals But

youre not obliged to a guy you do not know. If it is your friends girlfriend, then yes, do not sleep with her. If its random guy youve never met, and will never meet, you have no moral obligation to him. Again, I would recommend not sleeping with her, but out of objective selfish reasons, not because of niceness. mr x krazy January 19, 2010 at 6:35 am Women like confident men. Make the first move. Alucard January 19, 2010 at 7:34 am I used to be the nice guy too and got jack. now im a real jerk and there are three girls that keep coming back for more. they know about each other and still dont quit. try it it will work Melissa G January 19, 2010 at 8:04 am i mean dont be a total douche bag but dont be a pushover.. i mean i dont like pussy men and i dont like assholes iether just find a balance.. and no assholes do not finish in hte long run trust me.. iknow people say that im a girl and not fugly either lol so thats how i feel about it annalisa January 19, 2010 at 8:14 am well, you would be cheating as is she, and getting involved with a married woman probably wont end well. As for the Mr. Nice Guy routine not working for you, capitulating to a married woman hitting on you is NOT a sign of being assertive. Try actively seeking someone who is available, and tell this lady to buzz off. stuckinabox January 19, 2010 at 8:19 am think how crappy the womans hubby will feel. this could end a marriage do thy have kids?

i think she is the wrong woman for you. but you do need to stop being a pushover. find someone else and be more confident. lots of woman are looking for the nice guy. shana_j_4188 January 19, 2010 at 9:06 am It seems 2 me that ur kinda upset about being the nice guy however i think this is a bad idea besides romance in the work place is always a bad idea!!! If your really as nice of a u claim 2 b u will find someone special just 4 u and im pretty sure u wouldnt want that person 2 cheat on u.and 2 answer ur question about being a rebelwellli think ur looking at it the wrong way, if u want 2 be a rebel how about sky diving or bungy jumping.!!!!!! And as far as good guys finish last.i think it just matters that u finish the race.. Good Luck mark2zephyr January 19, 2010 at 9:20 am If all you can do is form a relationship with a married woman, who obviously has marital problems then think about this. You will be on the rebound / you maybe responsible for a marriage breakup / there maybe children involved etc etc etc Nice guys just have to find nice girls ICIL January 19, 2010 at 9:37 am Whats wrong with society today? I would kill for a nice guy but, they are too hard to find. Dont lower yourself to this woman, you might regret it later on. Be yourself, keep your dignity, dont change and never worry what others might think of you. All the best..

Some Guys Get All the Women

Here is a nice article by some guy who obviously hasnt taken my secret quiz. The article is ok, it has some good points, and you might find it useful if you have already taken the quiz yourself. ========================= Ever wonder why some guys get all the women they want and others barely seem able to handle the leftovers? Whats the difference? Its not always looks or financial status, although some women will follow those everywhere. Notice some very ordinary looking men with drop dead gorgeous women on their arms and you sit back and wonder. Does HE know what women want? Has HE learned the secret? We all know that many women will read romance novels even if they dont admit it. Have a look on any plane trip you take. A romance novel lasts one flight and most every woman has one in the seat pocket. Look at the main male character. Ill bet hes a hero type always ready to come to the aid of the woman he loves. Think about it for a minute. When women read these books, they get involved in the story because they can imagine themselves as the female lead. If thats the case, the main male character must be a man most women could imagine themselves falling in love with. He must be a confident person, in control of his own life but not need to control anyone else. Hes not the jealous type. Hes strong but filled with tenderness for his lover. Women love to be in his presence and men look up to him. Hes attractive because he takes care of himself. He exercises, eats well, dresses well and enjoys taking her out to dinner and parties. He pays attention to his woman. He does the little things that mean a lot to every woman. He tells her often that he loves her and cares about her. He brings a little treat that proves he was thinking about her when they were

apart. To really get her attention he sends flowers to her office. She loves this because everyone she works with knows shes valued. What can you do? How do you transform yourself to a romance novel hero? Start walking or working out at the gym to build up your body. Women might not be aware of it but they like a man whos strong enough to protect her if she ever needs it. Improve your eating habits. Drink less. Smoke Less. Once you have the body that screams powerful, have a look at your wardrobe. What per cent of your clothes would you call trendy? Dont go out and buy a new wardrobe but get a few pieces to match some you already have to spice it up. Once you have your woman, shell enjoy shopping with you. Are you the type of person a woman would feel comfortable spending time with? I know thats a serious statement, but are you a nice guy? Ive met way too many men who think scratching their balls, belching and asking for a beer is being nice, but thats not the nice Im talking about. Can you listen to her without trying to finish her sentences or fix every problem she has? If you want to REALLY impress a woman, listen to her. Let her know that her life is important to you and is more important than any other person male or female. Walk with confidence. Stand up straight. Your mother didnt tell you that for nothing. It shows you are not depressed or whiney. Have the most positive attitude you can muster and work on that every day. When youre positive, youre fun to be around and you attract others to you those women youd like to meet. A man that barks and grumbles all the time about everything is not a fun person to be with. A man that always wants to take on anyone he disagrees with is not a fun person to be with. A woman wants a man wholl protect her when necessary; hes patient, kind and comfortable in his own skin.

Finally, take a friend or two to the local cosmetics counter and get some new cologne. You need women to go with you because what you smell on yourself might not be what others smell. You want the knowledge that you smell SOOoooo good. Your friends will tell you. Dont use too much but enough so that when you walk by a woman, she turns her head. Then you smile at her and if she lingers, ask her out! Mike James September 4, 2011 at 1:13 pm laughable. This story TRIES to advocate changing your life to get a date. Forget that change your life for YOU. Never compare yourself to anyone else, why would you wanna be like anyone other than you? Very ridiculous. Q&A: Unfortunately have the nice guy syndrome. Shall i stop being nice(Not become rude, but just stop being nice)? Some dude from yahoo answers had a cool question. Now, its obvious he hasnt taken my secret quiz, but ignore that, and focus on his question, and how I answer it. Question: Unfortunately have the nice guy syndrome. Shall i stop being nice(Not become rude, but just sop being nice)? here is the kinda guy i am a guy who will listen to his female friends every complaint, rant, problem, and experience in life; will help them out no matter to the cost to them; would die for their friends without even thinking; . All their female friends will continue to go out with mindless, stupid assholes that treat them like ****, and hurt them over and over again, never even considering the nice guy, because of his normal physical appearance I Have always wondered why all my relationships wont work.. But today i found out that its because of the nice guy syndrome I am thinking about changing and become a neutral or sometimes a mean person.. And i will do it.. I know a its a nice personality i have But all i got from that personality

is being hurt and worries.. So i dont think i got nothing to lose, if i still become treated the same being a mean person plus i feel like being nice,caring and giving is not the real me, Even tho i have been doing that for years, but i don kno why i keep doing it, may be i am just used to itmy inside keeps on telling me that its not the real me, so today i am gonna try to accept my inside and not be the kinda nice guy i think i am, and see what happens.. here is an example My friend (this girl i love) asked me last time if she can stay at my room until she finds a place to stay because she broke up with her boyfriend I said,Okay,, My reasons?.. she is my friend, i love her, I feel like i have to be there when she needs me like always, it might be a chance for me to make something happen, I ain got nothing to lose by letting anyone to stay in my room for few days but it would mean some thing to that person. But my mind was telling me , don let her stay in your room, she will end up giving you worries, tell her **** off, and you dont care if she ain got no place to stay,but i finally decided to let her stay in my room for few days, just for the sake of staying the same nice person i was and being there for her, and she ended up giving me stress and worries in those few days. so if it was to day,, i will listen to my mind and tell her look, i am not your boyfriend, i wont let you in my room, and whatever stiuation you are in is not my buisness, the only reason that i might let you in my room is just in case something good happens between me and you, but i dont think so, if it didnt happen all these years ive known you, it wont happen now : so fack off, you are not getting into my room,,, i know this would be a rude response, but this is what my mind Was telling me so what i am saying is that i think i am a nice guy, but thats not the real personality i have in my deepest mind i think i have been acting nice all these years just to get recognition and seems like am used to that personality,, but that is not my real personality

Plus, I dont know why but it seems like EVERYONE find it easy to disrespect me.. I know its not good to compare myself with others but it seems like people find it easy and okay to disrespect me once they know me, but not others who are not nice.. I have noticed this in many different ways. Ithink its because of that nice personality of mine, that everyone i meet start disrespecting me once the know me..i fell like if i dont do any thing for the sake of people and stay limited to myself no body will find it easy to disrespect me or treat me less than othersi really want to know why? is it because i am making myself available too much? how do i draw lines? or make people understand that i am not being fool when i help them? so dont you think i have to change and be the real me and never do anything nice to people when i can even tho i ain got nothin to lose? seriously, why? why do something nice, when its not ur business? just stay to your self and don harm anyonei mean i dont ever want to become mean or rude, but i just want to stay to myself and do what is good for me and not care about anyones problem if it is not my fault i wonder if it is going to work?

My answer: Its not that easy to stop being a nice guy. You have it mastered over all these years. I was in the same situation like you. I recommend you read about it and research it. There are many articles and products on the internet that talk about this ongoing issue. Go and search about being successful with women and being more confident. But be careful. You will be offered to buy a lot of products from the seduction community. You dont need any of them. What is free is enough. I wish I could give you the answer in this question, but the truth is that it will take you years to break out of the nice guy syndrome. So be prepared to work in order to get rid of it. No quick fixes available.

The Truth About The Nice Guy Syndrome

Prepare to have your mind blown away with that is essentially the hardest piece of truth youre ever to swallow. Almost everything you know about the nice guy syndrome is a lie. And if women online or in articles have ever tried to make you feel guilty for your nice-guy beliefs, Im about to show you the motives behind these womens insults and taunts hint, its not a pretty secret. In fact, the nice guy phenomenon itself is really this weird, complicated universe of conflicting interests, manipulations and distortions, profound in their depth and complexity. In fact, what I will reveal may anger a lot of women, as well as shock most men who refuse to accept women as they truly are. The sad truth is that almost everything out there about nice guys is false. Both the camps sympathetic to nice guys, and the camps bashing and shaming nice guys are utterly wrong and dishonest. The actual, objective truth is hidden somewhere else entirely. First Things First What Is The Nice Guy Syndrome? The technical definition of the nice guy syndrome, simply states that this is a set of behaviors and characteristics that certain guys possess and perform. These include things such as: going out of your way to please people; overly focusing on giving other people what they want; offering unreciprocated favors and gifts; as well as avoiding confrontations and disagreement at all cost. The problem with this technical definition is that it doesnt say anything useful. In fact, if anyone read the definition above, theyd be confused to hear

that theres so much confusion, anger and debate about the phenomenon of nice guys. You see, theres another, very deeply hidden secret about the nice guy phenomenon, and it concerns something you might not have heard mentioned before. when women say they want nice guys, they have a very different definition than most guys do There is a simple question that I shall pose, that will help you sense where I am headed. This is a question that far too many people have left out of the debate for too long. Let me give you a hint. Have you ever wondered what the difference between a good guy and a nice guy is? And if so, how can it help us understand the nice guy phenomenon as well as all the conflicting opinions about it? You see, very often, when women say they want nice guys, they have a very different definition then what you, or most guys might have. In fact, its radically different then you might even guess at. Speaking Of Which Crave Any Fatties Lately? What am I talking about? Cravings? Fatties? Am I losing it? No, and in fact, this is extremely related to the subject at hand. In order to understand the nice guy phenomenon a little better, we will have to depart from it for a little. In fact, you will have to face some intellectual honesty you might not have faced before. It wont be a hard exercise though, and I promise to make it simple and easy. In fact, Ill go straight to an example that will start to clear the fog and uncover the matrix. Imagine the following: You somehow happen to meet and get to know two women. Theyre good friends, but radically different from each other. One of them looks like your favorite pornstar (lets call her Roxy), but shes addicted to cocaine, hangs out with criminals and is known to stalk former lovers and threaten them with false charges and violence. In fact her criminal buddies are known to crack skulls for her. The other woman is Peggie an obese, unkempt and facially deformed woman, who happens to be the nicest person ever. She goes out of her way to please you, be nice to you and does everything youd ask for. Whom do you desire having sex with more? Wait, Are You Saying Nice Guys Are All Obese And Ugly!?! Not exactly, in fact, it has nothing to do with looks. The wormhole goes a bit deeper than that, and the curtain has only just begun unfurling, right here, in

front of your eyes. You see, the main reason that you crave hot women is evolution. There are certain physical traits that for most of human history were associated with a good mommy. In essence, the more a woman had these certain physical traits, the more it was guaranteed shed make a good mommy to your babies. The problem in the modern world is that you can have a woman who achieves these through bulimia and drugs. This is what I call the dreaded curse of the ancient markers. Obviously, Peggy would make for a better mommy, and you consciously know this, but it doesnt matter. Youre still physically drawn to Roxy, as your only intention right now is to just get laid. This is what I call the curse of the ancient markers. It means you are hard-wired to be attracted to certain markers, instead of qualities. You are drawn to a certain breast size and shape, waist to hip ratio, skin quality and tone Yet, these markers are poor indicators of anything fertility-related in many cases, and especially in the modern world. Does this also explain the bad-boy phenomenon? Actually, yes it does. You see, whereas most of your attraction markers are based on fertility indicators, a womans attraction is based on status indicators. Oddly enough, today, bad-boys display a lot of fake status markers, just like Roxy from our example showed false fertility markers. Now, heres where it gets interesting. There is actually a really weird (at first glance) marker that humans use to decide how to act around others. A stunning study recently actually showed a direct relation between status and niceness. In essence, when a person had lower status than their conversational subject, they acted more agreeable, and nice. The bigger the status difference, the more the low-status subject tried to please the other. This explains the real reason why women dislike nice guys This explains the real reason why women dislike nice guys. They might make all sorts of excuses and try to insult the nice guys, but in truth, they dislike nice guys because they display low status. And remember, the number one imperative of females in the human species is to bind with a male that has higher status than she does. This is a phenomenon known as hypergamy and stands behind all of male-female relations in society.

In fact, hypergamy is probably both the best proven, and best documented trait of females in most species, including the human species. The highest value females in our society, the hotties, openly show this drive and even turn into unabashed gold-diggers. On the other end of the spectrum however are the low-value females. Being unattractive, they cant afford to satisfy their hypergamy drive, so their instinct is to get whatever they can. In order to achive this, one of the strategies of the uggos is to keep beta males dazed, confused and frustrated. This is why you will see how unattractive women will feign outrage at even the mere mention of a concept like hypergamy. Remember, the goal of the uggos is to keep nice-guys from growing in status and effectivelly attracting the hotties. In fact, most dating advice that teaches you to be nice is written by unattractive women. Its quite sneaky, and it works. Confused nice-guys end up frustrated in their attempts with the hotties and eventually decide to settle with a uggo. Did you know? Scientists have actually done studies where they have shown that women are more attracted to arrogant signals of high status. In one study they actually had photos of the exact same guys, either being casual and looking at the camera (the female viewer) in a friendly, nice and pleasing manner; or looking away in a dismissive or cocky manner. Guess which photos got the guy rated as being hotter? Yep, the arrogant and cocky ones. The women of course could not tell why they find the guy hot, they "simply did". Thats just one of many studies in which scientists have shown how indifference, arrogance and even narcissism make a guy more attractive to women. Whereas a person who is indifferent due to real high status, will have people kissing up to him, a jerk will not. The guy whos just a jerk, and arrogant out of sheer "badness" will not be liked by other people. Most normal men will not want to be his friend, and most women will hate his guts. Guess what though?

A lot of women are going to be attracted to him. Its just like you hate bitches like our friend Roxy from earlier, yet you fantasize about banging her, the women too despise and dislike bad boys, yet end up banging, and even dating them so often. So Nice Guys Are Really Unfair Victims Of An Evolutionary Glitch? No, not really, in fact nice guys contribute to their own downturn in a big way. You see, when the nice-guy clich started really picking up in the 90s, and early 2000s, a backlash was born. The unabated cries of men were started to be answered by women, but the response wasnt pretty. In fact, any and all of the major responses to nice guys involved putting the nice guys down and putting the blame entirely on the victims, refusing any responsibility on the part of women. hes really a conniving, manipulative asshole And to a small extent [the backlash leaders] were right. What they suggested is that nice guys, are not really nice guys. In fact, they pointed out how when a nice guy is trying to please a woman, listening to all her problems and pretending to care about subjects she finds fascinating, hes really a conniving, manipulative asshole. The problem however Is that the women pointing the finger were just as intellectually dishonest. They did point to a valid issue about the intellectual dishonesty of the nice guys. It is in fact true, that most of the nice things that these guys do are neither genuine nor sincere. The average nice guy out there is in fact pretending to care about her emotions and feelings; watching movies he dislikes, while pretending to like them; and being all-around dishonest simply to get into her pants. Did you know? Several additional studies have further proven that bad boys do finish first. Not only are women more attracted more to bad boys (the ancient markers), but women do also actually end up hooking up with and dating these bad boys in the real, practical sense as well. The points these backlashers make, though exaggerated, are in fact true. The problem however is that there is a huge bit of intellectual dishonesty on the part of the accusers as well. What they forget, is the original cry of the nice guys. These men never claimed to be perfect or without ulterior motive, they simply pointed out the dishonesty of women.

Any woman who tries to shame you or insult you for being a nice guy, is really mad at herself Their entire life they had been told by women that they want a nice guy, but then they witnessed these same women going for the worst possible assholes and jerks. The real truth, is that the backlash against nice guys is really lead by feminists, bitches and other gynocentric individuals and groups. Any woman who tries to shame you or insult you for being a nice guy, is really mad at herself. The truth is that bad-boys are kind of like junk-food. Nobody has it on their list when they go into the supermarket. They have a list of so called health foods* when they go in, but end up fetching the tasty stuff were biologically programmed to crave. And just like with food, the more unhappy and lacking in esteem that you are, the more you succumb to your cravings. The more of a void that you have going on inside, the more you need to stuff it full of sensation numbing indulgences. When you read an article that bashes, insults and rips apart nice guys, you need to feel sorry for the author. Shes really mad at herself, and her inability to resist bad-boys. Shes an unhappy individual whos turning her self-hatred on the outside and lashing out. As we explained above, there is a kernel of truth to what she says, but then she exaggerates it and tries to shame you with it. Dont fall for it. Any mature, well-balanced woman will be able to explain things in a balanced way.

*Note: The whole concept of junk-foods and health-foods is in itself a fraud, and a false distinction, but Im just using them here as a metaphor as theyre extremely suitable for this demonstration. Are You Saying I Need To Become A Jerk Then!? I would no more recommend that, then I would recommend women become "Roxy" in order to attract men. Its short-sighted and stupid. You see, men in general go through three general stages in the process of maturing in their understanding of women. Most guys remain in stage 1, which is the nice-guy stage. Some guys progress to stage 2, which is the jerk stage. A very lucky and rare few, do eventually mature to the peak of the mountain, and reach stage 3, the good guy, the real man.

Now, I do realize that what I just pointed out is almost insulting in its simplicity, but it really is that simple. It does, however open a new question How the heck do you become a real man, and what does it mean to develop character? How do you get status? Does that mean you need be famous? Well that too my friend is really simple. All you need to do is develop the six main areas of your life.

- Get cool, big social circles - Become relatively fit - Get a fun lifestyle

- Develop great social skills - Get good at some skill - Get confidence

Simple and true you might say And in fact, too simple, too vague, and not anything concrete, right? Well, you see, thats the trick. There is no concrete thing to say or do in order to (for example) become a social wonder tomorrow. You know exactly what you need to do, it just takes years of going out and socializing. You know exactly what you need to do, in order to get a fun lifestyle optimize your day, ditch addictions like TV and surfing, and get more time for hobbies and other lifestyle activities. Now, you already know all this, and you know how to get any of the 6 status-components in the list above. The 3 Secret Tips You Didnt Know So, if you know exactly what you need to do get these 6 things, and you also know they will give you tons of status, then why dont you have them yet? Well, its not your fault really. You were simply mislead about how to get them, and exactly how much of them you need.

1) Its not a race. 2) Do it one bite at a time 3) You dont need to be perfect, just better Now, what this means in practice, is that the reason most guys dont (for example) become relatively fit is because of perfectionism. They think they have to get a perfect fitness model body in 6 months, or else theyre a failure. They tend to sign up to a hardcore gym, train like Rambo for 2 weeks, get overwhelmed and then quit.The trick is that the 90/10 rule applies here as well. Simply getting a relatively fit body gets you 90% of the status that looking like a male model does. Just exercising 10 minutes a day, at home, with the right exercise, has 90% of the same results as being obsessed with fitness. You dont need to be perfect, just fitter than the average guy . You need to become ok with things taking time. If you just commit to exercising every day for 10 minutes, in 2 years you will be radically transformed. If you simply decide to slowly ramp up your social life and join more hobbies and activities, adding one every month or two over a few years you will have drastically expanded your lifestyle and social circle. Do it one bit at a time. Also, when I say become good at some skill, I dont mean that you become amazing. Dont try to become for example the worlds most famous yoga celebrity. Just being known in your town as a guest instructor of Yoga is good enough to give you status. This is especially true when you combine it with the other 6 areas. Simply become a bit above average in these six areas, and you will have high status. And yes, you will blast that nice guy syndrome out of existence. Anonymous May 19, 2011 at 1:49 am Im commenting in behalf of myself. The thing about being the nice guy is that it causes frustration when we see beautiful, sweet, Independent, loving women being smitten by these jerks that only want to get laid. Excuse me, the nice guy wants to get laid too. Only hes being punished because he has manners. And the frustration gets worse when we hear the word clingy as mentioned towards the end of this article. I cant speak for all nice guys, but I for one am not clingy. However, I am not ashamed to tell or show you how I feel. I mean, I just met Roxanne, shes hot, I also find her funny. Ok, so Im interested. I want to talk to you. So ill call you. Show interest. So Im clingy?? Then you must be use to just being ignored or told to be quiet or just plain

treated like crap. Musicians got it made in this department. I have lost quite a few beautiful women because they rather chase metal musicians across the 50 states who Im sure they have to know isnt the only one he bangs while on the road. Some have a main girlfriend. And that STILL doesnt bother these groupies. And its US thats clingy?? Thats enough to drive a nice guy into banging his head against a steel vault. Because these same groupies will tell their friends that youre the stalker. Needy.. HOLY SH*T!! Whats going on??? Mike James August 29, 2011 at 4:05 am Since there are more women than men these days and so many young women do get it when it comes to this topic and being a guy who has been through a lot of what young guys are getting frustrated over I can simply say QUIT PINING OVER THESE DUMB BROADS AND LIVE YOUR FREAKING LIFE too much is made about sex, relationships these days.. and people (yes, women are people too) are keyed in on that Begs the question what have people been allowing into their heads? So many people pissing their lives away, from meaningless relationship to meaningless relationship really dumb. Nice Guy Syndrome laughable. No such thing. Its all a ruse. The so-called nice guys are duped into believing that they have to be perfect to get a girl while most girls in their late teens to mid-twenties have no clue about themselves or their lives yet its sad to see young men waste so many tears, so much time over shallow, dumb, clueless girls who will give up sex to anyone who looks a certain way, says the right things Nice guys, Ima tell you all the truth Looks fade. Girls get boring. Be in this life for the long haul. What I am telling you flies in the face of all of what you have been led to believe on this topic. Why devote time, tears to someone who dont even recognize what/how you feel? Develop yourself and you will get someone so much better And refuse to call yourself a nice guy Just be yourself. For those of you who HATE that phrase, be yourself, it is the truth. The more you avoid it, trying to do things like youve been doing, the more miserable youre gonna be. This goes for girls too I mean, life is simpler than we make it. I been where you are. Its rough You will be better off if you all will commit to building your life, rather than trying to fit in, trying to do fifty-million and one things that will never make you as happy as you think they will. Life is short. Dont waste it.

Q&A: Nice guy no more; Im going bad boy?

Some dude from yahoo answers had a cool question. Now, its obvious he hasnt taken my secret quiz, but ignore that, and focus on his question, and how I answer it. Question: Nice guy no more; Im going bad boy? I just got done reading a lot of info both here and everywhere online and I decided for the first time in my life to try the bad boy approach for myself. So ladies (over 18 only please) tell me if this is what attracts you to the bad ones. 1.Supreme confidence in every situationborderline cocky. 2.Never smile and never give complimentseven insult her. 3.Blatant disregard for any rules-without breaking the law. 4.Always be in control. 5. Be aloofdont call after dates, keep her guessing. 6. Never be dependable; never be where she expects you to be. Also, this question is directed only towards the ladies out there who know they prefer to date bad boys. If you like the nice guys please dont answer. Thanks! My answer: Let me tell you first that most women will not admit to you that they are attracted to bad boys. They simply care too much what society thinks of them. Its the way they were raised and the way that everyone expects them to be. Now, on your transformation. I understand why you dont want to be a nice guy any more. Nice guys truly do finish last, if they ever finish! However, dont think that you are going to become a bad boy so easily. If you have been a nice guy all your life, it wont be a bit easy becoming a bad boy. Bad boys are usually jerks, and you dont need to become a jerk to attract women. All those rules up there that you wrote are good, but they are to strict to be followed ALL THE TIME. You should use them flexibly. Rather than force to being a bad boy, become a true confident man that simply says NO when he means NO, and says YES when he means YES. Dont seek approval from women, dont try to impress them. Live outside your comfort zone as much as you can.

See, those are simple guidelines to follow. There are a few of them and you can see how they work for you.
superchiky May 25, 2010 at 5:05 am sorry thats ridiculous Kori G May 25, 2010 at 5:17 am Im going to say none of those are a turn-on for a long-term relationship. I think the badboy appeal applies to short-term flings Id say be the good guy and things will eventually be in your favor with the girls :) Just my opinion :) Oh, and being insulting never worksNEVER! pay_tribute May 25, 2010 at 5:49 am Ladies wont admit to being attracted to those things; they are subconsciously attracted to them. Beautiful K <3 May 25, 2010 at 6:46 am You were probably better off just being your normal self. Not many girls that have respect for themselves will let a guy treat them like crap! killerkitten May 25, 2010 at 7:08 am Dang son. Thats not a bad boy, thats just a jerk! Bad boys are sweet in the sense they hook you in, and then do bad stuff to push you away. They dont insult a lady. Pretty much all guys to #5 and #6. Youre gonna get nowhere with this attitude. PLEASE ANSWER! http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;_ylt=Ai1Otn9JZMu6zxVGdV6aGwbD7BR.;_ylv= 3?qid=20080628163552AAmUrOF In*Luv May 25, 2010 at 7:17 am

see the thing a lot of girls love to date guys who got bad boy look without bad boy attitude/ erin l May 25, 2010 at 8:09 am that is sooooooooooooooooo wrong the only one i liked was no 1 please try harder if going for the bad guy try: walking past her every now and again and winking ( but keep walking ) if she asks you out then say u r busy but arrange for another time DONT be clingy DONT ever insult her even if she likes the bad boys ( u could end up with a glass of wine on Ur head and a broken nose ) hope this helps u m8 vince April 5, 2011 at 9:52 pm um, yeah your 100% right on every one of those rules. and to all these women who say differently: name one guy friend you ever had(who wasnt gay) and you just told him i want a guy just like you to be with and have sex with all the time, but it cant be YOU so if you want a nice guy, date him and THEN chase the asshole for a change n stop making us good guys wait till our feeble years to even see poon. so you want an asshole to F%^& but you want a nice guy so HE can take all your emotional garbage and the asshole gets all the poon. so tell me fair or no? cuz i think its a load of crap you want a nice guy whose a friend and an asshole to f^&% untill he beats you and kicks your overweight and with three kids out on the street, and you want us nice guys to take you back then??? heh i wish we could say sure your like a sister to me and slam the door in their face n tell em to live under the freeway! Mike James August 29, 2011 at 4:12 am This only works on brain-dead girls under 18. If any guy is considering turning into a bad boy BKA douchebag, BKA total and complete jackass think about the long run. Youre not your true self. Youre just another d-bag that girls will avoid. You sold out (you ditched you God-given personality for a trend) in order to get laid really smart.

How To Pick Up A Woman On The Street If You Have The Nice Guy Syndrome
I know that you see everyday a number of great women walking past you. And you dont have a clue what should you do to stop them and have a conversation with them. And we are not talking about normal conversation, we are a talking about the conversation in which you express your intention of being with her. Would you like to know how to do that. Imagine how your life would look like if you do that just with one woman everyday. Your life would turn around. So what are you waiting for. Guys start analyzing and talking to themselves when they see an attractive woman. Instead of saying anything just to start talking they go into their head and do nothing. When they actually figure out what they should say the woman is long gone. The best thing you can do when you see a woman like that is to simply stop thinking and stop her right away. Just say: Hey stop. Then introduce yourself and say why you stopped her. You stopped her because she was beautiful/sexy/interesting/sweet and you wanted to talk to her. You may think that this wont work for you because it does not involve some fancy lines or trickery. Well thats exactly why it works, honesty always works. And dont get fooled, beautiful women get hit on all the time. But men dont ask to see them in private. They are scared senseless. So the best way is to be quick and to the point. Tell her that you like her and ask her for a number. Important thing if you can go with her on a date right on the spot. Everybody has 15 minutes for coffee, dont excuse yourself. Then you can ask the woman all kinds of question and actually see is she good for you or not. If you really dont have time then set up a date for that day in the evening or for the very next day. Dont fool yourself that you have all the time in the world. You dont.

Do Nice Guys Finish Last?

Is it really true that nice guys always finish last; that the jerks are the ones who make it in this world? Well, yes.. in some situations. But in dating scene nice guys definitely finish first, especially when they learn some professional tips and tricks. So what are the tips that could turn the dating world in your favour? There are few of them, so lets get started. The first tip is very simple, and probably you have heard it before. It says that you should always be genuine. If you want to have true success with women and dating then you should always be honest with yourself and with your partner. Lying and holding back is something that you should always avoid, it ruins any kind of relationship, especially this one you are seeking. Most people appreciate honesty, those who dont appreciate it also dont appreciate themselves. Just be genuine and open and show your true self to your partner. As you do this you will have more fun and less stress. The other important thing is that you should always maintain a good outlook on life. Positive people are always more attractive than negative ones. Let your glass be half-full not half-empty. Of course it is not possible to be happy all the time, but keep an eye on the bright side of life. That kind of attitude will help you in all areas of your life, not just dating. Also it is very important to stand out of the crowd in any way you can. Make yourself known. Bring humor and fun into your relationships. Humor helps you to relieve stress and its a great tool for connecting with your loved ones. Humor is one of the factors that can make or

brake relationships, keep an eye on that. Having a successful life also means laughing at yourself sometimes. We all make mistakes, accept them with grace and laugh at them. Mutual respect is one of the most important factors that keep the relationship. We all deserve it, and you are in big trouble if you think that you are better than other people. Thats is a serious character flaw, work on making eradicating it. Normal people always treat each other with respect. In conversation you show respect to the other person by looking her in the eyes and listening. Dont interrupt a woman with your self-praise stories. If you listen for a change, your relationship will flourish.

Q&A: NICE GUYS?????????

Some dude from yahoo answers had a cool question. Now, its obvious he hasnt
taken my secret quiz, but ignore that, and focus on his question, and how I answer it. Question: NICE GUYS????????? Okay. So guys youre always sweet and nice to pretty much all girlslike go out of your way niceand lets say pretty good looking as well. So how would a girl you are interested in as more than a friend know you arent just another girl youre being overly nice to?? PLEASE SHARE. (The guy Im interested in is really nice to everyone so its hard to tell if he likes me more than just a friend. Weve been friends for 2 years, but this whole hanging around me/sitting by me/telling me how amazing I am has just started this semester (first semester hes not had his long-term girlfriend)). My answer: Well, if he has been telling you how amazing you are just recently, it may be an indication. It is most probable that he does like you more than a friend. But, you really have to make sure of this. You can test him if he likes you more than a friend. I remember when I was in the same situation as your friend. I didnt know she liked me. So, one day when we were out as friends, we started talking about kissing. We didnt even talk that much about it, but it was obviously enough for what she was about to do. She told me Hey, I wonder how you kiss? Lets kiss for a moment so I can find out. Since she was being so playful and cool about it, we kissed for a short time and soon after that I really got the picture that she didnt just do that for short term fun. Try anything with him that goes beyond your everyday friendly interactions. Tommy May 25, 2010 at 5:19 am you can always just ask him thats kinda hard though MyntzSmg May 25, 2010 at 5:32 am

Oh geez. Thats one of the hardest because everyone always thinks the nice guy is always flirting with that one girl. If he is interested in you, then youll notice something much different. Hell most likely try to get your attention for every joke, make eye connection, and try to move you away from the group to talk to you pr Magic Goku Ninja May 25, 2010 at 5:41 am Nope, this theory is not true. Im a 47 year old man, and have not crossed the finish line yet, and I do not believe I ever will. Ive never had a girlfriend or kissed a girl. Pablo May 25, 2010 at 5:44 am Dude drop the nice guy act girls want a cocky, full of himself guy. Now watch all the girls who answer this question are going to say they love nice guys haha Nick May 25, 2010 at 5:55 am i think of my self as a nice guy and i didnt finish last. you just have to have the confidence bc thats whats key. metro.angel May 25, 2010 at 6:33 am Nice guys finish last but get the best. Thats what I believe, nice guys are the best. Girls who arent worth it go for guys that arent worth it, vis-versa. And girl who are go for guys who are and visversa and they last longer if not forever. jwinnings May 25, 2010 at 7:26 am i only date nice guys girls end up marrying the nice guys so just be your nice guy self dont be an ass, be confident in who you are, the nice guy! Justin G May 25, 2010 at 8:16 am there is a saying that my dad uses girls lust for bad boys, but want nice guys.. there is such thing as to nice, like not turning down anyone in need of help..if its not serious and you have something planned go with what you want. stiffen up and get on a stern side every now and then. you will see a change

Haley S May 25, 2010 at 8:33 am dont get cocky us girls do not like it!!! and nice guys dont finish last. girls all like dif. guys. and most girls i know like nice sensitive guys!!! NightTrainWooWoo May 25, 2010 at 9:14 am Yeah nice guys tend to finish later than others. I was the consummate nice guy in high school, always being there for girls when they broke up with a guy, helping out with their problemsetc. It wasnt until college when I joined a band and played football that I realized girls like buttholes. The worse you treat those girls the better they like you, as long as you are in a rockin band or are the backup cornerback for the football team, then you can be nice once in a while and girls will still like you. The moral of the story is to do something better than sitting around playing frickin video games, learn a sport or an instrument. I do not believe she would know. I bet you he is looking for the right girl :) davester1970 May 25, 2010 at 5:51 am Being the quintessential nice guy, I think I can answer your question. Of course I am an older adult so I have had more experience in the dating game than guys in your age range. I am nice to all of the ladies. Being that I was raised around a bunch of women, I was taught at an early age how to be nice and respectful to the ladies. I learn that as a man you treat a woman a little more differently than you would treat another guy. That being said, I learned that there is a difference between being nice to woman and being romantic to a woman. If I am interested in a woman that way, I flirt with her non-stop. I am constantly looking her in the eyes and saying romantic things. I also complement her on the the way she looks. I ask her out if I am feeling the vibe.

How Teasing Women Can Make You More Attractive

Acting like a nice guy is not so good when it comes to relations with women. This is a common knowledge. For women nice guys are nice, and only that. There is no adventure or challenge in them. Women will say all kind of nice things about nice guys, but they will never be attracted to them. Too bad, sorry. This does not mean that all of a sudden you should become an arrogant prick. This is only a short term solution to a long term problem. And it wont work for you, you will look incongruent. Women will talk about you but not in a good way. You dont want that also. The best way to become more attractive is to use humor when you talk with women. And the best way you can use humor AND spark up attraction is to use cocky funny humor. Add just a little bit of cocky attitude in your jokes and you are on the right path. The best way to tease a girl is through a simple friendly conversation. I know this sounds weird but you should treat a woman like you bratty younger sister. This is so good for attraction that women will actually flock to you if you use this little technique. This whole humor thing may sound weird to you. Thats because no one told you about the importance of it when you meet women. Must guys think about humor as using some cheesy jokes and on liners. Thats not real humor, thats junk. Humor is a tool for attitude projection, remember that well. And when you use cocky funny humor, you project the right attitude. Women are always interested to a challenge of any kind, especially if comes in a form of a cocky and funny man.

Q&A: Im tired of playing the nice guy and being stepped on. How do i act like the not nice guy?
Some dude from yahoo answers had a cool question. Now, its obvious he hasnt taken my secret quiz, but ignore that, and focus on his question, and how I answer it. Question: Im tired of playing the nice guy and being stepped on. How do i act like the not nice guy? Well, im a nice guy and i have gotten walked on passed over one too many times. I dont want to be an a-hole but what techniques do the not nice guys do, that i can use in my repertoire so i can stop being walked over and put in the friend zone. My answer: I was in the same situation as you many years ago. Its good that you dont want to become a jerk, because many nice guys take that direction after years of frustration. Here is some bad news. You cannot stop being a nice guy just with some techniques. This is a process thats going to take years to unlearn. Anyone who says differently is trying to scam you to buy their product or method. Since there is so much to tell and I cant change you through this post, let me give you suggestions on where to start. Go to google and write datinggroundwork and succeed socially. Study the second website especially well. They are both from the same author, who spent years developing confidence. Just be careful of the people who want to get you to buy something from them. Those two websites are all you need for at least 1-2 years.

:) May 25, 2010 at 5:29 am Girls like nice guys.

Lynne Lovegood May 25, 2010 at 5:31 am so you want to be mean? if you want to be mean then dont say hi/hello to anyone be stubborn and let them say it instead of you. or you could even ignore them. be straight forward and dont say things in a nice way. but i personally love nice guys (; i couldnt...save you May 25, 2010 at 5:59 am Have confidencebut dont be overly confident because then youll be seen somewhat as a jerkbut dont let others tell you what to do and speak your mind and as long as you do that you should see you true self and so should others..hope i didnt sound confusinggood luck with life^^ Shae May 25, 2010 at 6:14 am You dont have to be an A-hole, just act like stuff doesnt bother you, and to avoid the friend zone dont let any girls talk to you about other guys and make sure you make it known that you like them. and that will improve things 100% Im sure volleyball_200491 May 25, 2010 at 6:50 am sorry that youve been walked on; we all have. personally i think you should stay nice cause not nice have no respect. if you wanna be like that just be a jerk i guess. but you SHOULDNT do it :) SierraMASCARA May 25, 2010 at 7:41 am I know how all guys get confused by how all the hot girls date these a**holes but to be honest, I dont know one girl that doesnt want a nice guy! Just be yourself , I know it sounds lame but Maybe just be more assertive. No need to change your ways for girls.. If you have more than friend feelings for a girl, STEP UP. tell her upfront so she doesnt put you in

that friend zone. Dating isnt easy, it takes time, but if you tell a girl you feel.. She might feel the same way :D good luck man LG May 25, 2010 at 7:44 am Remember these things: 1. Its OK to be selfish. All human beings are selfish. And if anyone tells you different theyre lying through their teeth. This doesnt mean we dont ever do things to help others. But it does mean we do them because we WANT to do them. 2. Your life is your own and you can do what you want with it. You can spend the rest of your life counting grains of sand on the beach if you want. You dont owe anybody anything. 3. Theres no such thing as a bad feeling. Actions have real world consequences. But no feeling you have makes you a bad person. Nice guys may consider people who think this way as#$%les. But its really the only sane way for a real human being to live. Nice guys have been taught to believe that its not OK to want anything for themselves, and that life is all about obligation, not for fulfilling ones own happiness. Nice guys typically have/had domineering, emotionally distant mothers. And end up seeking out domineering, emotionally distant females for mates. Its their low self-esteem telling them they dont deserve to be treated well, along with being terrified of getting close along with familiarity and other reasons that keep them coming back for more. Working on self-esteem is the way out, learning about yourself, the good the bad and the ugly, and being OK with it. When you do this, youll stop hating yourself. Youll come to believe you deserve to be treated well. And youll naturally be drawn to people that do this.

Q&A: Do nice guys finish last because they become the friend first?
Some girl from yahoo answers had a cool question. Now, its obvious she hasnt taken my secret quiz, but ignore that, and focus on her question, and how I answer it. Question: Do nice guys finish last because they become the friend first? i was thinking about how nice guys always complain that girls want the bad boys instead of them. 1. not all of us want bad boys. 2. is the problem being that the nice guy becomes friends first, and when he tells how he feels, its too late, and she has the image of brotherly love for the dude? My answer: Yes girl, you got it! His problem is that he never shows any sexual confidence and acts as a brotherly friend from the beginning. He is extremely nice from the beginning. He doesnt go for what he want (sex). After a lot of time passes, he verbally explains to the woman that he likes her, providing that he has the courage to do even that. After that, he starts hating women and being resentful and revengeful. Most women cant help themselves here. They already feel only friendship toward the guy. Its not a conscious choice women make. Its just nature taking place. And yes, nice guys do not lose because they are not bad boys. They lose because they dont show any confidence and sexual determination with women at all. Don j May 25, 2010 at 5:47 am

Ya mistakes nice guys made were becoming friends first. My major problem was when I was a nice guy, was that I never showed my sexual interests, because I never had sexual interest to begin with. The girl just grew on me, and then I developed feelings, and by then it was way to late. So now I just show interest in less than 1 minute of talking to a girl that I am attracted to, and only make friends with girls that I already slept with. I cant be friends with a girl I havent slept with. codcrysis May 25, 2010 at 6:13 am Yeah, thats the problem. And you were very right in putting brotherly in inverted commas. Choo Choo May 25, 2010 at 7:01 am It has to do with Killer instinct. Nice guys dont have it. LetUsPrey May 25, 2010 at 8:00 am 1. Youre a girl, you dont KNOW what you want. So youll probably disagree with the rest, too. 2. Its mostly to do with wanting what you cant get, and since guys usually cant be subtle with their feelings, even if they dont say anything, the girl subconsciously picks it up due to behavior, and starts pushing the nice guy away. And in turn, going for the guy that pulls her hair, etc.. Elain D May 25, 2010 at 8:15 am Bad boys tend to be witty and fun and usually know how to flirt up a storm. There is something exciting about the wild or the better-avoided or the spark. Falling for a bad boy doesnt really require you using your head,

but falling for a good guy is usually a combination of heart, hormones AND your brain. You dont want to marry the bad boy we all want to marry the good guys. Lipi May 25, 2010 at 8:55 am Its all about the age really. When you are young douches get the girl because they fulfill a foolish miss concept of passion in the girls eye(very romeo and juliet. Good play, terrible experience to live (THEY BOTH DIE)) When you are older the nice guy gets the girl because he is the a real man that is willing to stay by you through thick and thin. Nice boys finish last, nice men get the woman they never did get when they were young. BabeHeart May 25, 2010 at 9:40 am Nice guys dont always finish last, but those who feel like they are often overlooked are frequently guilty of the behavior you describe. Another issue is that they are often less aggressive than the bad boys so they get less attention in general. When two good looking people are present, but one is talking, engaging others in conversation, making jokes and generally getting attention (but not being obnoxious), the other person will tend to be virtually invisible. Thats often what happens with these good guysthey are less likely to take the initiative, and then later complain that girls dont like them. If more of them were confident and go-getters, theyd get better results. Even the bad boys dont always get what they wantthey just tend to not let it bother them. K May 25, 2010 at 10:24 am

Ive never related to #2 I know one of those nice guys i think. I think the real problem is they are just not asertive enough, and dont play dirty. I think they are totally wrong for blaming it on girls liking bad boys. This particular guy i probably would have cheated on my partner with, but he woulnt have a bit of it, he respected my relationship too much. It was probbaly for the best, my partener and i are made for each other, just lust blinded me for a while. So he missid out on a fling there, but it was probably for the best. Bad boys probably have more flings, but probably get as much rtouble as they dish out. Despite this experience, he still blaimed his being single on girls like bastards. He had a friend he had known for years and asked her out, he got the i like you as a brother response. Which i think was a twist on the truth. I had coffee with this girl a little while later (hed told me aboutasking her out but she didnt know he had). It was when i was considerring cheating on my partner with him. Her reaction to my lusing after him was why him, i mean hes nice and all, but not like that or something like that. I dont think being a friend was his problem there.B ut maybe a bad boy would have got a no way, mate! if there was a similar lack of chemistry. Recently he asked out another old friend and she went for it, it seems to be going well. I dont think being friends with them too long was at all part of his problem. I think good boys miss out on a few messy flings, mostly by choice, a few things that may have worked cos theyre shy, and i think they get a few too many confusingly polite knock-backs because girls dont want to hurt their feelings which skew their perception. I think the girls like bad boys and the love you as a brother effect are both rubbish.

Q&A: Nice Guys Finish Last?

Some dude from yahoo answers had a cool question. Now, its obvious he hasnt taken my secret quiz, but ignore that, and focus on his question, and how I answer it. Question: Nice Guys Finish Last? Ive been reading up on nice guys, and wonder if theres really a hint of truth in the nice guys finish last theory. Speaking for myself, Im generally a very nice guy; I take the initiative to do nice things for other people like opening the door for them or listening when they need advice. I dont think Ive turned down anyone in need of help. Heck, Ive been described as a nice time quite a few times already (especially from some of my girl friends). Is this ruining my chances of finding that someone (i.e. people just taking advantage of my niceness)? Whats the deal with nice guys and relationships anyways? Btw, I try not to be a pushover (I make my own choices and whatnot), but how nice is too nice? My answer: Well, if you are asking if it will ruin your chances of finding someone, I think the nice guy syndrome is somewhat hurting you. I am not sure what situation you are in, but I can tell you one thing: the Nice Guy theory is correct. Ive been a nice guy most of my life and I have only gotten bad things out of the. The good things I perceived back then, like comfort, pity, similar nice guy friend, were not actually good things, they were bad things that only kept me a nice guy. Nice guys truly do finish last. This however doesnt mean that you have to be a jerk to succeed in life and with women. You have to maintain boundaries which you let no one cross. If you are strong and confident, it means that you say YES when you mean YES, and say NO when you

mean no. Nice guys secretly believe that they are superior towards everyone else because they are so nice. They even secretly resent confident people. If you get rejected and used by women a lot, you might be a nice guy. If you are older than 18, and you dont have any sexual experience, you are probably a nice guy. If you are, you can get help, dont worry. Magic Goku Ninja May 25, 2010 at 5:41 am Nope, this theory is not true. Im a 47 year old man, and have not crossed the finish line yet, and I do not believe I ever will. Ive never had a girlfriend or kissed a girl. Pablo May 25, 2010 at 5:44 am Dude drop the nice guy act girls want a cocky, full of himself guy. Now watch all the girls who answer this question are going to say they love nice guys haha Nick May 25, 2010 at 5:55 am i think of my self as a nice guy and i didnt finish last. you just have to have the confidence bc thats whats key. metro.angel May 25, 2010 at 6:33 am Nice guys finish last but get the best. Thats what I believe, nice guys are the best. Girls who arent worth it go for guys that arent worth it, vis-versa. And girl who are go for guys who are and vis-versa and they last longer if not forever.

jwinnings May 25, 2010 at 7:26 am i only date nice guys girls end up marrying the nice guys so just be your nice guy self dont be an ass, be confident in who you are, the nice guy! Justin G May 25, 2010 at 8:16 am there is a saying that my dad uses girls lust for bad boys, but want nice guys.. there is such thing as to nice, like not turning down anyone in need of help..if its not serious and you have something planned go with what you want. stiffen up and get on a stern side every now and then. you will see a change Haley S May 25, 2010 at 8:33 am dont get cocky us girls do not like it!!! and nice guys dont finish last. girls all like dif. guys. and most girls i know like nice sensitive guys!!! NightTrainWooWoo May 25, 2010 at 9:14 am Yeah nice guys tend to finish later than others. I was the consummate nice guy in high school, always being there for girls when they broke up with a guy, helping out with their problemsetc. It wasnt until college when I joined a band and played football that I realized girls like buttholes. The worse you treat those girls the better they like you, as long as you are in a rockin band or are the backup cornerback for the football team, then you can be nice once in a while and girls will still like you. The moral of the story is to do something better than sitting around playing frickin video games, learn a sport or an instrument.