Marriage in Islam

Islam considers marriage as a solemn Iamily relationship between a man and a woman, based on
mercy and love. More inIormation about marriage and married liIe in Islam, including courtship,
the marriage ceremony, and the spousal relationship.
The Islamic Marriage Contract
Marriage Contract Conditions
negoLlaLlng and slgnlng Lhe conLracL ls a requlremenL of marrlage under lslamlc law and cerLaln
condlLlons musL be upheld ln order for lL Lo be blndlng and recognlzed
O Consent 8oLh Lhe groom and Lhe brlde musL consenL Lo Lhe marrlage verbally and ln wrlLlng
1hls ls done Lhrough a formal proposal of marrlage (ljob% and accepLance of Lhe proposal
(pobol% A flrsLLlme brlde ls usually represenLed ln Lhe conLracL negoLlaLlons by her woll a male
guardlan who looks ouL for her besL lnLeresLs Lven so Lhe brlde musL also express her
wllllngness Lo enLer lnLo marrlage ConsenL cannoL be obLalned from Lhose who are legally
unable Lo glve lL le people who are lncapaclLaLed mlnor chlldren and Lhose who have physlcal
or menLal lmpalrmenLs whlch llmlL Lhelr capaclLy Lo undersLand and consenL Lo a legal conLracL
O ,f 1hls word ls ofLen LranslaLed as dowry" buL ls beLLer expressed as brldal glfL" 1he
brlde has a rlghL Lo recelve a glfL from Lhe groom whlch remalns her own properLy as securlLy ln
Lhe marrlage 1he glfL ls payable dlrecLly Lo Lhe brlde and remalns her sole properLy even ln
case of laLer dlvorce 1he mahr can be cash [ewelry properLy or any oLher valuable asseL
LlLher full paymenL or an agreedupon paymenL schedule ls requlred aL Lhe Llme of conLracL
slgnaLure 1he mahr may also be deferred unLll LermlnaLlon of Lhe marrlage Lhrough deaLh or
dlvorce ln such an lnsLance Lhe unpald mahr becomes a debL agalnsL Lhe husband's esLaLe
WhaL was your obt" Share here
O Jtnesses 1wo adulL wlLnesses are requlred Lo verlfy Lhe marrlage conLracL
O 9enuptfContfntCondtons LlLher Lhe brlde or Lhe groom may submlL conLracL condlLlons
whlch lf agreed upon become legallyblndlng condlLlons of marrlage CfLen such condlLlons
lnclude agreemenLs abouL Lhe counLry of Lhe couple's resldence Lhe wlfe's ablllLy Lo conLlnue
her educaLlon or career llfe or vlsLaLlon wlLh lnlaws Any condlLlon LhaL ls allowable ln lslamlc
law ls allowed Lo be enLered as long as boLh parLles agree WhaL were your marrlage conLracL
condlLlons" Share here
Xter Contract Signature
AfLer Lhe conLracL ls slgned a couple ls legally marrled and en[oy all Lhe rlghLs and responslblllLles of
marrlage ln many culLures however Lhe couple do noL formally share a household unLll afLer Lhe publlc
weddlng celebraLlon (wallmah% uependlng on Lhe culLure Lhls celebraLlon may be held hours days
weeks or even monLhs laLer
Mutual Agreement oI Bride and Groom
Marriage (Nikah/Shaadi) is a solemn and sacred social contract between bride and groom. This
contract is a strong covenant as expressed in Quran.
Both parties mutually agree and enter into this contract. Both bride and groom have the liberty to
deIine various terms and conditions oI their liking and make them a part oI this contract.
Mahr
The marriage-giIt (Mahr) is a divine injunction. The giving oI mahr to the bride by the groom is
an essential part oI the contract.
'And give the women (on marriage) their mahr as a (nikah) Iree giIt"
Mahr is a token commitment oI the husband's responsibility and may be paid in cash, property or
movable objects to the bride herselI. The amount oI mahr is not legally speciIied, however,
moderation according to the existing social norm is recommended. The mahr may be paid
immediately to the bride at the time oI marriage, or deIerred to a later date, or a combination oI
both. The deIerred mahr however, Ialls due in case oI death or divorce.
One matrimonial party expresses 'ijab" willing consent to enter into marriage and the other party
expresses 'qubul" acceptance oI the responsibility in the assembly oI marriage ceremony. The
contract is written and signed by the bride and the groom and their two respective witnesses.
This written marriage contract ("Aqd-Nikah) is then announced publicly.
Sermon
The assembly oI nikah/shaadi is addressed with a marriage sermon (khutba-tun-nikah) by the
Muslim oIIiciating the marriage. In marriage societies, customarily, a state appointed Muslim
judge (Qadi) oIIiciates the nikah ceremony and keeps the record oI the marriage contract. The
documents oI marriage contract/certiIicate are Iiled with the mosque (masjid) and local
government Ior record.
Prophet Muhammad (S) made it his tradition (sunnah) to have marriage sermon delivered in the
assembly to solemnize the marriage. The sermon invites the bride and the groom, as well as the
participating guests in the assembly to a liIe oI piety, mutual love, kindness, and social
responsibility.
The Khutbah-tun-Nikah begins with the praise oI Allah. His help and guidance is sought. The
Muslim conIession oI Iaith that 'There is none worthy oI worship except Allah and Muhammad
is His servant and messenger" is declared.
The Muslim oIIiciating the marriage ceremony concludes the ceremony with prayer (Dua) Ior
bride, groom, their respective Iamilies, the local Muslim community, and the Muslim community
at large (Ummah)
Marriage (nikah) is considered as an act oI worship (ibadah). It is virtuous to conduct it in a
Mosque keeping the ceremony simple. The marriage ceremony is a social as well as a religious
activity. Islam advocates simplicity in ceremonies and celebrations.
Prophet Muhammad (S) considered simple weddings the best weddings:
'The best wedding is that upon which the least trouble and expense is bestowed". (Mishkat)
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The Muslim Wedding Celebration
tbougb tbe Isamic marriage ritua is simpe, many Musims stage coorXu,
mutiday Xestivities
Sharbarl 8ose |
9otos Mlkl uulsLerhof

Although many Muslims stage a multiday celebration to mark a wedding, the traditional
marriage ritual itselI, called a nikah in Arabic, is simple and brieI. It generally Iollows these
steps:
At the wedding, which can take place pretty much anywhere, the bride and groom are separated
in diIIerent rooms. They may or may not be able to see each other, depending on how
conservative the Iamilies are.
An oIIiciant, who can be any man Iamiliar with Islamic law, heads to each room separately.
There he asks the spouses-to-be iI they consent to the marriage and iI they are marrying oI their
own Iree will (a representative called a wali answers the oIIiciant's questions on the bride's
behalI).
The couple signs the marriage contract or license, with witnesses observing.
The oIIiciant brings the pair together and pronounces them husband and wiIe.
A Nuslim Weuuing Celebiation
Days oI lively parties oIten surround the nikah, and that's just what Shaila Khan plans Ior her
wedding. In her Pakistani culture, Khan explains, marriage becomes a big issue once a girl hits
post-college age, and women are oIten expected to wed within their own ethnicity. Khan's Mr.
Right happens to be Irom Pakistan, and she admits that his background helps prevent conIlict.
"It's nice to have someone understand who I am and where I come Irom," says Khan, a New
York investment analyst in her mid-20s. "And I don't have to worry about my Iamily accepting
him." Though Iar Irom a typical South Asian, Khan now Iinds herselI looking Iorward to a
typical Pakistani wedding, Ieaturing a week oI singing and dancing, including the Iollowing
events:

holki: The wedding celebrations begin with the /holki (named aIter the /holk, or drum) one to
two weeks beIore the actual three-day wedding ceremony. During this event, young guests sing
and dance while beating on the dholk.

The bride and groom traditionally hold their own /holki. Friends and Iamily gather at their
respective houses to practice songs and dances Ior the upcoming mehendi ceremony during the
week oI the wedding. "There's usually a whole week oI back-to-back /holkis beIore a wedding.
I've had so much Iun attending them in the past," Khan says. "It's just an excuse to get together
with Iriends and Iamily to dance." The women closest to either the bride or groom usually
choreograph the dances, and it's mostly women who perIorm. The couple's Iamilies prepare
dinner Ior the revelers, and the party goes late.

Mehendi: The 20h0n/i ceremony takes place on the Iirst night oI the three-day wedding.
Usually the most Iestive part oI the event, it's Iilled with noise and color, with women dressed in
bright Iormal shalwar ka200 outIits and saris, and with unmarried girls sporting long skirts and
blouse outIits called l0h0ngas. The 20h0n/i can either be held separately Ior the bride and groom
or jointly. A joint 20h0n/i lends to Iriendly guy/girl competition while each side takes turns to
outdo the other. In more conservative Iamilies, the women are kept separated Irom the men.

The bride traditionally wears a Iormal yellow outIit, and, as the name oI the ceremony implies,
has wet 20h0n/i (henna paint) applied on her hands that day. "The bride, along with all the
women on both sides oI the Iamily, has henna designs put on her hands and sometimes her Ieet,"
Khan says. "It's basically a bridal shower, but a lot more colorIul. It's deIinitely my Iavorite part
oI the wedding Iestival and I plan on having a lot oI Iun on mine."

It's customary Ior the bride to be escorted onto the stage under a yellow color /:5ata, or large
scarI, held up by six Iemale relatives or Iriends. Her head is covered and bowed, and she doesn't
have much makeup or jewelry on at this event. In joint 20h0n/i ceremonies the groom arrives at
the ceremony aIter the bride with his entourage oI guests, called the baraat. The baraat typically
plays loud songs while entering the ceremony hall and is greeted by two parallel lines oI the
bride's Iamily and Iriends.
ikah: The main wedding day is less eventIul than the preceding days. The bride typically wears
a bright-red ghaagra, a heavily pleated skirt with a long blouse embroidered in gold. The /:5ata
is hung low over her bowed head and wrapped around her shoulders in such a way that her heavy
gold jewelry is not hidden. This outIit is the most elaborate oI all the ones the bride will wear.
"With all the gold the bride wears on her wedding day, she looks and Ieels like a queen," Khan
says.

Grooms either wear a traditional sh0rwani with a turban or a Western-style suit. Some grooms
wear a veil oI roses on their head beIore the bride enters. As a game, sometimes the bride's
young Iemale relatives and Iriends will steal the groom's shoes, returning them only when the
groom pays a bargained amount oI money. At the end oI the night, a procession escorts the
couple to the wedding car and throws Ilower petals on the couple.

'alima: The groom's Iamily hosts the ;ali2a, or the Ieast, the night aIter the wedding. The Ieast
signiIies the consummation oI the wedding, and is roughly equivalent to an American wedding
reception. "Pakistani Iood is very rich and heavy, so that truly makes Ior a real Ieast," Khan says.

Don't get the wrong ideawith all this planning it may seem like Khan is engaged, but she hasn't
slipped on the ring yet. Asks Khan with a smile: "A girl's allowed to plan, isn't she?"