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Jessica Hendley
ProIessor Rieman
English,1103
September 14, 2011

Writing this paper was very different from other assignments that I have received. This
profect was not a research paper which allowed me to bring my own opinion and feelings into
my writing. I personally like my paper, it may not be greatest paper written but it allows me to
review myself as a literate individual and how my past can help others. My strengths of the paper
can be seen in my description of the 'Little Narratives` and I feel like I tie in each story to the
purpose of the paper. I want to explain why I put so much detail into the description of my
Saturday morning .My mom is the most important person in my life and she had such a great
influence on my life. My mother gave me every opportunity to succeed in my literacy fourney but
still I had problems comprehending .I feel like these situations will help me become a better
teacher in the end. My weakness is that I may have some unnecessary details in the story
.Overall, I pleased with my paper after a few more revision I think I will add this paper to my
writing portfolio.
Saturday Morning
Literacy can be deIined in so many ways because it can be so diIIerent so many people.
For a car mechanic, being literate in car parts would be necessary probably more important then
being able to read Shakespeare. A person that is in an academic Iield may need to have a
diIIerent type oI literacy to build their career and knowledge. For both oI these careers the
deIinition Ior sponsors can be Iitting Ior both occupations.The individuals that inIluence the
Comment |]1]: 1haL's a greaL Lhlng Lo Lhlnk
abouL
l feel llke Lhls paper really helped me Lo undersLand
myself l am glad you could see LhaL
Comment |]2]: Cood!
l Lhlnk l wanL Lo puL Lhls paper ln my porLfollo
Comment |]3]: Cood LlLle ?ou may even wanL
Lo Lhlnk of a subLlLle Lo furLher descrlbe your
paper's focus
l Lhlnk LhaL ls a good ldea lor example SaLurday
Mornlng ? Well l can'L Lhlnk of anyLhlng rlghL
now buL l wlll work on lL
Comment |]4]: Cood polnL!
1hls class has really opened my eyes Lo dlfferenL
Lypes of llLeracy
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mechanics are considered sponsors Ior their literacy, individuals that help to understand and
advance in their course oI study This means that their sponsors oI literacy can be deIined by
Debra Burt`sdeIintion: 'any agents, local or distant, concrete or abstract, who enable, support,
teach, model, as well as recruit, regulate, suppress, or withhold literacyand gain advantage by
it in some way (Brandt 166). This deIinition can be is also Iitting Ior my liIe as well, this brings
me to where I Iound my place in literacy.I don`t know the day, time, place, or how I learned to
read. I do remember where I spent my Saturdayswhen I was not at my grandma`s house. My
mom would gently wake me up and I knew the routine. Soul music playing in the background,
windows open to bring in the sunshine, and a light scent oI lemon Irom dusting the bookshelves
Iilled the small house that resembled a cottage. By the Iront door a stack oI books piled high
Irom our last visit. AIter watering the zinnias in the Iront yard, we would load the car with the
books and head to our library. When entering the library my mom would take a deep breath, as
though the smell oI books Ied her hunger Ior knowledge. A quality now that I am glad was
passed down to her children. Being greeted with smiling Iaces oI the elderly librarians in the
children`s section made my struggle with reading much easier. On this trip to the library my
mission was to Iind a book about Mae JemisonIor a project Ior my third grade class. I started my
project early because both my mom and I realized it would take me longer to Iinish. I was going
to make this the best project I would do to show myselI, my mom, and my teacher that the extra
tutoring and trips to library were really helping me read like the rest oI the class.Sitting on the
reading rug in the library with books surrounding me, I rememberbrowsing the books, coming
across a word I did not know, and sounding out each letter like I was taught- trying out each
vowel to decipher between short and long sounds. I did this oIten. Hours passed and when it was
time Ior check out both my mom and I would leave with a stack oI books. Every day aIter that I
Comment |]S]: s a reader Lhere's someLhlng
LhaL makes me wanL Lhls Lo be Lhe end of Lhe lnLo
and for you Lo begln a new paragraph wlLh l don'L
know"
1hlnk abouL your purpose wlLh Lhls lengLh of an
lnLro paragraph uoes lL do wanL you wanL lL Lo do?

cLually lL was Lhe new paragraph buL l Lhlnk ln
edlLlng Lhe paragraph moved up Lo Lhe lnLro on
accldenL l wlll make LhaL change

Comment |]6]: CreaL descrlpLlon here and nlce
phraslng wlLh Lhls llne abouL your mom enLerlng Lhe
llbrary
1hank you! l was proud of LhaL llne!
Comment |]7]: Longer Lhan whaL?
1o flnlsh and compleLe my pro[ecL
Comment |]8]: Can you conLexLuallze Lhls a blL
by sLaLlng whaL age or grade you were aL Lhls polnL?
l wlll go ln more deLall ln my reverslons
Comment |]3]: Make Lhls a longer llne Lo make
lL a dash lnsLead of a hyphen
1haL was an error ln Lyplng Sorry
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would come home Irom school, Iinish my homework to the best oI my abilitysaving the stuII I
needed help with Ior aIter dinner so my mom could help me once she got home Irom her two
jobs- and working diligently on my project. I remember learning so much about the Iirst black
Iemale astronaut. My mom made me write so many rough draIts oI my paper, making sure I got
it right. By the Iinal draIt every 'T was crossed,and every 'I dotted. But my project was Iar
Irom over. The next steps would involve making my project unique and diIIerent. You see, one
oI the requirements oI the project was to present your project to the class. Talking and
communicating has always been one oI my strong suits.
As part oI our usual routine on Saturdays we were heading back to the library the next
week, and I was on a search to Iind a book to make my project great. While browsing the books I
Iound a book about making costumes. My mind was bursting thought bubbles. Along with
preparing a biography oI Mae Jameson with all the books I used Irom the library, I decided to
build my own paper astronaut suit Ior my project. Building this astronaut suit allowed me to
show my diIIerent deIinitions oI literacy. Many people think literacy can only be described as
reading or in a academic setting but Ior me adding creativity to my project allowed me to show
oI my literacy in a diIIerent Iorm. Finally aIter memorizing my speech, drying the props and
cutting the outIits, and double-checking my paper, I was ready to show oII all oI my hard work.
All oI the other students that went beIore me were doing the typical presentation oI a project;
when my turn came I stood in Iront oI the class with my props and outIits and a sense oI
conIidence that I did not Ieel very oIten in school. I presented my project with ease, telling all I
learned about Mae Jameson and what we all can learn Irom her.My teacher was so proud I
earned an A but more than that, looking back, I learned that I could be a good reader- it would
just take a little more practice.The best part was the Ieeling oI accomplishment and success.
Comment |]10]: nd dld Lhls klnd of llLeracy feel
dlfferenL for you Lhan Lhe readlng and wrlLlng
expecLed of you aL school? leellng more compeLenL
ln Lhls realmwhaL dld LhaL do for you?
Well l have always been a Lalker l knew l could
always good grades on presenLaLlons

Comment |]11]: CreaL!
1hank?Cu l WS vL8? 8Cuu!!
Comment |]12]: Why choose a semlcolon
here? 1haL was a Lypol dld noL use lL correcLly

Comment |]13]: lL seems you also learned Lo
supplemenL your readlng wlLh oLher Lhlngsllke
creaLlng a cosLume or maklng a speech uld Lhls
Lype of supplemenLaLlon conLlnue LhroughouL
school? uo you sLlll use lL?
?es l would always make elaboraLe posLers and
pro[ecLs l am an advocaLe for a loL of color ln my
presenLaLlons
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Even though I thought I had made progress in my journey through reading and writing, I
was shut down by my IiIth grade teacher. I Ielt like I was less than everyone in my class, as iI the
teacher singled me out and pointed out every mistake I made to the class. II she was not calling
my mom to complain that I was getting distracted in class, Iailed a test, or did not complete my
homework correctly then I was being called to her desk to discuss these issues. I remember we
would read books in class in a circle on the Iloor and she would call on students to read, I Ielt as
iI she would call on me to read the hard parts and would call out all my mistakes. I was never on
the honor roll, I never received straight A`s , and I had trouble concentrating. Finally, one day I
came to class completely prepared I was not to nervous to read in Iront oI the class and I
remember reading with conIidence aIter reading a passage Irom the certain passage with more
ease than usual. All my IiIth grade teachers seem to be able to do was point out that I pronounced
a word wrong. In a way this angered me and made me happy that the only mistake she was able
to Iind was a pronunciation problem but I was angry that there was no positive Ieedback. This
obstacle allowed me to Iind a new technique when I am reading, beIore I read aloud to a group I
like to read over all the text Iirst this gives me a conIidence boost. When I look back on this
situation I realize that my IiIth grade teacher was a sponsor Ior my literacy , I am realizing I can
take her negative teaching styles and learn what not to do when I become a teacher. My goal as
a teacher is not to make my students Ieel inIerior to each other but Ior them to learn their
strengths and weaknesses and show them how they can use these attribute to help the greater
group .
Days, months, and years passed and I am standing in Iront oI my whole congregation.
Nervous as can be, I close my eyes and take a deep breath and start to read a 'Reading Irom the
Gospel oI Matthew. My level and conIidence in my reading abilities have changed by great
Comment |]14]: -one of Lhls sounds llke much
fun aL all
-o l haLe flfLh grade and LhaL ls one reason l wanL
Lo Leach lL Lo help chlldren dlscover Lhelr
lmporLance ln socleLy aL an early age
Comment |]1S]: Sponsor of ?
sponsor LhaL hlndered me from wanLlng Lo read
Comment |]16]: nd maybe help Lhemselves? lL
seems llke you learned how Lo compensaLe
1o make a greaL group lL ls lmporLanL Lo bulld Lhe
lndlvldual

8lg [ump Lo nexL paragraph Pow can you Lle Lhese
ldeas LogeLher more? Move your reader from Lhls
paragraph Lo Lhe nexL?
l don'L have an answer aL Lhe momenL buL l wlll
work on Lhe LranslLlon
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lengths since the third grade. I was being asked to read in Iront oI my whole church Iamily,I was
asked to proclaim the word oI the Lord. This was a great accomplishment Ior me since I was a
new catholic.Literacy took a diIIerent Iorm Ior me in my liIe. I wanted to become literate in my
religion. I wanted to understand everything about Catholicism since I was the only one in my
Iamily. I need to be able to answer every question and clear any doubt it my Iamily and peers
minds. By being able to proclaim the Word oI the Lord and understand it was an important step
in my religious journey.
This Iilled me with more joy and peace then getting an A on any paper, I was able to
proclaim the word oI the Lord, and I was able to perIorm in high school. In high school I pride
myselI in my ability to read quickly and understand I think the tutoring helped me to become the
educated women I am today.I was able to understand that people Irom diIIerent backgrounds and
liIe journeys may be introduce to literacy diIIerently, they can have multiple sponspors oI
literacy , and how they use their literacy can be diIIerent. When I become a teacher I want to be
a person that helps to light a Iire Ior literacy within my students. I want to inspire my students to
inspire others. II I can accomplish this goal then all my hard work would have paid oII.

Jessica,
The message that comes across quite clearly here is your determination to take your
experiences as a student to become the best teacher that you can be. You leave no doubt that
your understanding oI the need Ior positive reinIorcement and recognition oI one`s strengths and
challenges are important elements to consider as a teacher.
Comment |]17]: 1he only one who pracLlced lL?
-o l am Lhe only caLhollc ln my famlly l made Lhe
declslon ln Lhe elghLh grade afLer a year of classes
and deep splrlLual Lhlnklng
Comment |]18]: ndflnlsh Lhe sLory you begln
ln Lhls paragraph WhaL happens as you read ln
publlc Lhls Llme? ?ou are more confldenL uo you do
well? uoes anyone crlLlclze you?
l dld really well l was very proud of myself!
Comment |]13]: 1hls whaL? 1hls experlence of
readlng ln fronL of your church famlly? l should
connecL Lhe paragraphs beLLer
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You note in your selI-assessment that you know this draIt could use a Iew more revisions,
which is true Ior just about anything anyone writes. There a Iew directions you can go with your
revision work here, and you`ll need to decide where to Iocus your work Iirst. You Iocus a good
bit on reading here and it would be also nice to get a sense oI you as a writer. Was your
relationship with writing as contentious as it was with reading? II so, why? II not, why not?
What`s it like to be you as a reader/writer today?
Once you have all oI your content, I`d also encourage you to pay attention to coherence
in this paper. How can you make more connections between your paragraphs to move your
reader along with you? It Ieels like you jump a bit Irom one topic to the next and that you need
to give your reader more than you do here to make those shiIts more smoothly.
Please don`t be alarmed by all the yellow. The highlighting merely indicates places where
more careIully prooIreading needs to be doneread your work aloud to help with this and try to
identiIy any patterns you have that you could be more aware oI as you continue writing. I saw a
Iew comma splices, so here`s a place to look Ior guidance on how to identiIy and eradicate those:
http://wrc.uncc.edu/Resources-Ior-Students
Let me know what questions and comments you have in your talk back.




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Work Cited
Brandt, Deborah. 'Sponsors oI Literacy.College Composition and Communication.
49.2 (1998): 165-85. Print.










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Dr.Rieman,
Thank you so much Ior reviewing my paper, I really appreciate the Ieedback. I
Ieel like when I become teacher I am going to have to use all the resources and experiences Irom
when I was in school to help me reach children Irom all diIIerent background. I Ieel like positive
reinIorcement will just be the water to plants and the plants will be the students.
When I revise my paper Ior the Iinal portIolio I will add the revisions and probably stop
by the Writing Resource Center so I can make sure that my paper is Iitting Ior the assignment. I
have never really thought about my writing, I guess I need to look at my writing journey
because it will be important Ior my Iuture classroom.
AIter reading through my paper, it would not hurt iI I put more Iluid transitions to help
the Ilow oI the paper. I Ieel like I should Iix some oI the wording and punctuation in my essay to
make it more understandable to my audience.

Thank you so much Ior your input and comments on my paper.

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