Lyrically

Incorrect!
Christopher Long
1

Lyrically Incorrect.

With special thanks to all those who helped me write these parodies and compile this book.

Contents
1. Pour Some Syrup on It 2. Ice Cream Sundae 3. These Chores 4. Brits 5. No Spare 6. Obsessed 7. Tonic 8. New Girlfriend 9. Your Spread 10. I Love This Rug 11. I Wish it Was Christmas 12. Candy 13. Message on Your Mobile 14. Golfing Teacher 15. I Cannot Sing 16. Watching Disney All the Time 17. Here's My Wife 18. I Am the Best At Making Raspberry Tarts 19. Me and My Band 20. Bury Picasso 21. My Ship is On Fire 22. Going Up 23. Reading Books ` 4 6 8 10 12 15 17 18 19 21 22 24 26 28 30 31 32 34 36 38 39 40 42

Pour Some Syrup on ItParody of Pour Some Sugar on Me by Def Leppard. If Def Leppard wrote a Recipe this would be it: Take it off pause and just hit play I'm going to show a recipe today The cake is nearly ready, get the oven on Looking pretty good and it's very nearly done Get the oven gloves and go put them on It's 95 degrees, switch on the fan Twist the little dial until the temperature right Television cooks, they made me stay up all night Better taste good, I've been working all week This little cake is just for me, yeah Hey! C'mon, grab a spoon, mix it up Break the eggs, whisk them up Pour some syrup on it Ooh, that looks really good Pour some syrup on it C'mon just half a cup Pour some syrup on it Oh, I just can't get enough It's hot, sticky sweet Can't eat it yet, coz of the heat, yeah Listen. Ice it, slice it, ready now EAT! Proud of my cake, I'm going to put it on show Ramsay and Oliver can't get enough Sweet taste, pudding, just eat it up You gotta squeeze a little, squeeze a little Ice it a little more I love this cake, I want to bake some more Sometime, any time, sugar it sweet This little cake is just for me, yeah Grab the spoon, mix it up Break the eggs, whisk them up Pour some syrup on it Ooh that looks really good Pour some syrup on it C'mon just half a cup Pour some syrup on it 4

Oh, I just can't get enough It's hot, sticky sweet Can't eat it yet, coz of the heat You got the topping, I got the cream Thats a cake, fit for a queen Coz it's hot it is a real treat But can't eat it yet, coz of the heat Do you want cream? One scoop will do Take the cake cut it up Take the plate and eat it up Pour some syrup on it Ooh that looks really good Pour some syrup on it C'mon just half a cup Pour some syrup on it Ooh can't get enough Pour some syrup on it Get it, but not my bit Pour some syrup on it Ooooh Pour some syrup on it Yeah! All for me.

Ice Cream Sundae- Parody of Manic Monday by The Bangles. Dessert 's already here now I have wait for the cream My glass is up there waiting by the soda stream But they can't be late or they just won't get paid There are just so many ways your food can be delayed Not another ice cream sundae I wish they had sorbet I could eat that all day That's not much to pay Not another ice cream sundae Have to go out in rain It is almost closing time And if I started eating now I still would not finish in time What takes so long Wish I had only eaten a pear Blame it on the staff There is one right over there Not another ice cream sundae I wish they had sorbet I could eat that all day That's not much to pay Not another ice cream sundae All of these lights Why did my mother have to pick this place? In the town (This place, this place) All this chatter Why is everyone causing such a fuss? Enjoyment's down She tells me in a high-pitched voice C'mon honey, lets check the invoice Food's here at last Are you having some? Not another ice cream sundae I wish they had sorbet I could eat that all day That's not much to pay Not another ice cream sundae Not another ice cream sundae 6

I wish they had sorbet I could eat that all day Not another ice cream sundae.

These Chores- Parody of I'm Yours by Jason Mraz. Well I have seen a lot of DIY on the TV and I thought to myself well that looks so easy I'm filling in some cracks and now I'm building a rack Before the tools come out I will be using hand gestures and I think that flooring is the wrong dimension I think I better move that fern I think that looks handsome I will estimate some more and wait but I must do these chores Turn on the light so you can see Reading the plan is too easy Open up the box and you'll find gloves gloves gloves gloves Turning on some music and I wish the phone would ring I just need a cup of tea And these are way too tight, these gloves, gloves, gloves, gloves, gloves No I will estimate some more and wait but I must do these chores There's no need to estimate that pine is short Please can they wait, these chores Do do do do, do do do do But this doesn't want to come on Put that down over here And I really need a beer Do do do do woah woah I've been spending too much time just looking at the mirror So I better get it finished now because I want some dinner So I filled myself a glass And I saw a new chore and I laughed I guess all I'm doing is thinking of a good reason If there is such a thing as DIY is it out of season? I wish that it was true, but got jobs to do I will estimate some more and wait but I must do these chores There's no need to estimate that pine is short Please can they wait, these chores 8

(I will estimate) Turn on the light so you can see (What a chore, what a chore) Reading the plan is so easy Why don't you be smart and see that you can do these chores (They cannot wait, these chores) So please don't, please don't, please don't (There's no need to estimate) There's no need to estimate (Your time is short) Cause your time is short (It is very late) It is really getting quite late These chores

Brits- Parody of Kids by Robbie Williams and Kylie Minogue. Take up your positions Look at where we are We've got the best dancers here by far The show is about to begin Dancers are wearing black We've been making hits and now we are back Chorus And we'll keep rehearsing 'Til we get it I'm only doing it for the Brits (oh come on) Brits Award I've got pride (yeah) They'll be singing my song tonight Press record really try Cause the Brits are live After the presentation Well I guess I will be adored And numbers one position will be ensured You'll see what fame does to me I will have a lot of fans The purpose of this performance is to prove how good I am Chorus And we'll keep rehearsing 'Til we get it I'm only doing it for the Brits (oh come on) Brits Award I've got pride (yeah) They'll be singing my song tonight Press record really try Cause the Brits are live It's gonna be so amazing I'm gonna come in from above It's gonna be so amazing I'm gonna come in from above It's gonna be so amazing I'm gonna come in from above It's gonna be so amazing I'm gonna come in from above Descending from the ceiling I didn't think it would be so high

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The choreographer and me don't always see eye to eye People have to accept me as a singer in a band Well I want hummers baby This is my plan Brit Award I've got pride Brit Award I've got pride Brit Award I've got pride I'm part of the industry, and honestly, and I want more There's only one of me Single handedly making money Ain't no chance of the record company dropping me I've got my career in front of me That I know, yeah, definitely If you don't like me, I'll make no apology All my fans, yeah, they really follow me But for now, I'm in the top three Grab your dollars, come and buy me.

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No Spare- Parody of It's Not Fair by Lilly Allen. Oh I really like these specs I seem to wear them all the time They cost me 15 a day I really wish they were mine You know I think I'm quite a fan They make me feel so immature You know I wish I had a way To make my glasses more secure There's just no string They're getting in the way They won't stay on my head They're just no good It's such a shame Why did I pay that price? I can't believe it's true There wasn't too much choice Why did I drive to Dover? There's no spare How can I keep them clean? How can I keep them clean? How can I keep them clean? Thought I've put them there But They never can be seen They never can be seen Oh there's no spare But It's made in the UK It's made in the UK It's made in the UK Oh I need another pair What happens if they break? What happens if they break? Oh now the frames have detached I'll use wooden sticks instead I even try the cable tie I really need some brand new specs Next time I buy some with blue strings And they will make me so happy Maybe I'm just overlooking Maybe there's the ones for me

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There's just no string They're getting in the way They won't stay on my head They're just no good It's such a shame Why did I pay that price? I can't believe it's true There wasn't too much choice Why did I drive to Dover? There's no spare How can I keep them clean? How can I keep them clean? How can I keep them clean? Thought I've put them there But They never can be seen They never can be seen Oh there's no spare But It's made in the UK It's made in the UK It's made in the UK I need another pair What happens if they break? What happens if they break? There's just no string They're getting in the way They won't stay on my head They're just no good It's such a shame Why did I pay that price? I can't believe it's true There wasn't too much choice Why did I drive to Dover? There's no spare How can I keep them clean? How can I keep them clean? How can I keep them clean? Thought I've put them there But They never can be seen They never can be seen Oh there's no spare But It's made in the UK 13

It's made in the UK It's made in the UK I need another pair What happens if they break? What happens if they break?

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Obsessed- Parody of Just Dance by Lady Gaga. A board game La la Oh oh eh I play a little bit too much I will always play for cash, play for cash right I will always take a chance Can't find a single man Why am I playing this alone, alone Who is that, at the door? I love this board game baby, and I just wanna play some more Keep it cool, did I play this club? I can't remember but it's alright, alright Obsessed, gonna play all day Da da dooo Obsessed, spend that money babe Da da dooo Obsessed, gonna play all day P p p play Play, play, just j j just play Wish I could turn this game around oh oh oh oh Wanna make my mama proud. On games night Control your play babe But gonna win anyway And we're all going out tonight oh oh oh oh Who is that, at the door? I love this board game baby, and I just wanna play some more Keep it cool, did I play this club? I can't remember but it's alright, alright Obsessed, gonna play all day Da da dooo Obsessed, spend that money babe Da da dooo Obsessed, gonna play all day P p p play Play, play, just j j just play When I ring through after checking out that catalog Can't believe my eyes, so many games wanna play some more And I ain't gonna give it up, gonna beat you no matter who you are Gonna play, gonna play and play till 2 tomorrow yeah

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I can see that you might be a match for me The way you are cutting those cards without a sound And now there's no reason at all why you can't play and beat me In the meantime stay and let me watch you crumble down Obsessed, play all day Da da dooo Obsessed, spend that money babe Da da dooo Obsessed, gonna play all day Da da dooo Obsessed, spend that money babe Da da dooo Obsessed, gonna play all day P p p play Play, play, just j j just play Woo Let's go Half-psychotic, sick, hypnotic Got my blueprint, it's symphonic Half-psychotic, sick, hypnotic Got my blueprint, electronic Half-psychotic, sick, hypnotic Got my blueprint, it's symphonic Half-psychotic, sick, hypnotic Got my blueprint, electronic Go! Use your mind, lay them out, work it, hustle Play it, just stay close enough to win it Don't slow! Hold it, play it, lay out, show it Spend the moolah (I won it) On a car (I got it) Obsessed, play all day Da da dooo Obsessed, spend that money babe Da da dooo Obsessed, gonna play all day Da da dooo Obsessed, spend that money babe Da da dooo Obsessed, gonna play all day P p p play Play, play, just j j just play

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Tonic- Parody of Ironic Alanis Morrisette. I've had this since ninety-eight It's well past it's expiry date Just wish I had some Chardonnay Look at the clock, it's a quarter to eight But I have this tonic, That I'll drink Chorus: I didn't have time to go shopping today I really tried, hope there's lemonade It is a good prize, so I bought us some cake The memory of this, will linger Just to play it safe, I will not drive Going to talk some more, before I say goodbye I waited a whole week long, to enjoy this night As the rain poured down I thought, Glad I'm inside I have this tonic Have a drink Chorus Well Clive is a funny guy, likes entertaining you Makes you think, guests are okay and the party is going right Wish it was a sunny day and we could go out, when the food's all gone. That would be pretty ace It's time to go, it's getting quite late No party bags, for you to take Not even balloons, for you and your wife The party is not as good as it seems It was the worst one of my life All I had was tonic Here to drink Wanted gin and tonic and yeah, that is a drink! Chorus That was a funny day, no alcohol for me or you Come on everyone, I will just show you out Show you out.

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New Girlfriend- Parody of Girlfriend by Avril Lavigne. Hey Hey you you, I don't like these lyrics No way no way, I think you need some new ones Hey hey you you, I could sing those lyrics Hey hey you you, this is such a bad song No way no way, I don't know where I've gone wrong. Hey hey you you, I could write some lyrics These are the best lyrics, they are not so ridiculous With these chords the song is so addictive Don't you know that I can sing, play and write Don't pretend, don't you know that I'm a singing. Give my number to a lyricist, I think I'm going to ring her I can let you like what I do, but I'm not that bright. I'm like not that clever You could write so much better I think we should write together now. I could do the vocals and really shout I can repeat, repeat the lyrics And every verse I write I sing the same I know you will put this song on again and again Come over here, I know you don't have a musical ear And that it why I have a pop career RAP: In a second you could get a better singer, because they will, because they will be better They are lots of others, because I'm so bad a rapping Avril is so stupid, what the hell was she thinking!

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Your Spread- Parody of One Love by Bob Marley. This is a song to support the Marmite Love Party Your Spread Parody of Bob Marley's 'One Love' Your lunch Your spread Let's come together and eat Marmite How much am I buying? (too much) What am I having? (for lunch) Having eaten up the jar, it feels quite light Let's come together and eat Marmite Yum Yum Yum I have to have at least thirty jars (of spread) Finding that many is really quite a task (at art) Now is there enough in here for dinner I hope you do not mind if I have some for treat Your lunch Your spread Let's come together and eat Marmite It can be used in cooking (nice lunch) Not much money to spend (one pot) I think I have some stored So let's eat tonight Let's come together and eat Marmite One more thing If they were to go into administration (too sad) I would not want this to happen now, would you? (so wrong) I love to eat it on toast for dinner I really wish this was a Marmite eating nation Come on Your lunch Your spread Let's come together and eat Marmite So you just might find (you like ) Adored 19

(let's eat) I have heard that eating it is a delight Let's come together and eat Marmite Let's come together and eat Marmite Let's come together and eat Marmite

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I Love This Rug- Parody of Your Love is a Drug by Kesha.

Do I need that desk lamp, or do I need some sheets? I want a prize possession, to match my ceiling beams I'm checking on every website, I hope that the price falls I'm doing some late night shopping, may need to check out the malls What I want to buy is hard to find Think I'll put in a bid online I didn't win it, but I really tried I wish I could just press rewind Because I love, I love, I love this rug I love, I love, I love I said I love, I love, I love I love, I love, I love Don't really care about the price, mamma's telling me I should think twice Got one now which suffices, but really should think of the prices The old is covered in daisies, the new one is a bit more crazy My card is gonna be rejected, but this bill is self-inflicted What I want to buy is hard to find Think I'll put in a bid online I didn't win it, but I really tried I wish I could just press rewind Because I love, I love, I love this rug I love, I love, I love I said I love, I love, I love I love, I love, I love I don't care what I have to pay I'm going to buy this anyway It'll look great with my settee I'll have it home by the end of the day I've got to mention Do you want to come and help me with my carpet placement? I wish they had an offer like two for one Do you like, my rug? (Huh) my rug? (huh) my rug? (huh) my rug? Do you like, my rug? Because I love, I love, I love this rug I love, I love, I love I said I love, I love, I love I love, I love, I love (x2) Hey,hey, I love, I love, my new rug Oh that looks weird.

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I Wish It Was Christmas- Parody of Rocking the Suburbs by Ben Folds. Merry Christmas everyone! I am outside riding on my bike there is few days before the big night if I do not sleep soundly Father Christmas will not come to me oh come on there many things in my bag but they have that I wish I had most of all the fight plane that that model kit contains I wish it was Christmas just like when I was a kid I wish it was Christmas except I cannot wrap this lid I wish it was Christmas post the cards, write the tags buy the presents on computer so there no are suspicious bags Getting dark and I need a light so I can decorate my tree tonight think that may be too much right I do not want my room to be bright I really need to bake the cake how many cookies do I bake? I wish it was Christmas just like when I was a kid I wish it was Christmas except I cannot wrap this lid I wish it was Christmas post the cards write the tags buy the presents on computer so there are no suspicious bags there is x mas craze and I am putting up the last tree light and is it standing up al-right? I think it looks a bit wonky I feel it is fate I pray wishing for snow to stay and invite my great great great grand daddy and see my great great great daddy 22

slade and listen for his reindeer yes I hear the reindeer kids want that new toy that is supposed to be all the the rage I am outside riding on my bike there is few days before the big night I am outside riding on my bike there is few days before the big night I am outside riding on my bike there is few days before the big night I wish it wound hurry up !! I wish it was Christmas just like when I was a kid I wish it was Christmas now I can wrap this lid I wish it was Christmas post the cards write the tags I bought the presents on computer so there no suspicious bags ho ho and it is Christmas ho ho and it is Christmas I really want turkey, and I do not like pie! I really want turkey, and I do not like pie! I really want turkey, and I do not like pie! I really want turkey, and I do not like pie!

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Candy- Parody of Mandy by Barry Manilow. Merry Christmas to all at AM I RIGHT. Do not eat too much candy. I cannot believe my eyes, At Christmas they are twice the price. See that marzipan, That jar in the window, Such a lovely sight, I think I'll buy two Sweeties, what will Mummy say? Will I have to hide away? Judging by the price, She will be mad with me, But looking down the isles I see they have cranberry. Oh Candy, Well I wish you were perfect for baking, Need you on Christmas day, Oh Candy, I've eaten too much, now I'm shaking, Please take it away, Oh Candy. I wonder whether they do lime; Strawberry ones are hard to find. No, my mother yelled, Not ones with lime in, They're for Christmas, guys, And for post-dining, With brandy. I think I'll avoid ones with nuts in, And I'll put them away, Oh Candy, Just look at how many you're taking, That's enough for today, Oh Candy. This is too extreme, Christmas is dawning, Candy's on my mind and the sweeties are calling. Oh Candy, And now that my stomach is aching, I should put you away, Oh Candy, 24

I've eaten too much, now I'm shaking, But I can't keep away, Oh Candy, And now that my stomach is aching, I should put you away, Oh Candy, I've eaten too much, now I'm shaking, But I want you.

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Message on Your Mobile- Parody of Message in a Bottle by The Police. Used the phone today dialled an extra zero now I cannot hear your voice can't wait to see you when I get number right you are never there off enjoying yourself wish I was there I 'll send an SMS to your phone I 'll send an SMS to your phone I hope that you will get my I hope that you will get my I hope that you will get my message on your mobile message on your mobile I have even left you a Facebook post I should have done that right from the start modern handsets really are quite clever oh gosh I need to put my phone on charge I'll send an SMS to your phone I'll send an SMS to your phone I hope that you will get my I hope that you will get my I hope that you will get my message on your mobile message on your mobile woke up this morning cannot believe what I saw a voice mail message I am listening to one of four explaining that you've been on a trip to Rome saying that you will call me the minute you get home you got my SMS on your phone you got my SMS on your phone I'm glad that you have got my I'm glad that you have got my I'm glad that you have got my 26

message on your mobile message on your mobile message on your mobile message on your mobile now youve read my SMS now youve read my SMS thank you for my SMS thank you for my SMS thank you for my SMS thank you for my SMS thank you for my SMS thank you for my SMS thank you for my SMS thank you for my SMS thank you for my SMS thank you for my SMS thank you for my SMS

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Golfing Teacher- Parody of Father Figure by George Michael. Just what I wanted To have lessons and to learn just How to drive If I had clubs then I promise that I would really, really try Sometimes I think all I need now, is a caddy Although getting myself an instructor, would be handy Ho Ho Ho The one I wanted Is nice but really overpriced He wanted more money than the people In that golfing guide Now a spot of good weather, would be dandy If we played a round together, me and Mandy Ho Ho Ho I will be your golfing teacher I will not charge overtime Careful of that water feature Aim the ball and take your time I will be your golfing teacher Hold the club, yes that looks fine I am more than happy to, give you my time I did not realise This would be such an undertaking, with things to buy Why did I pay this money and hire this guy Sometimes I think it would be better, with a caddy But maybe he will make me the player, that I can be I will be your golfing teacher I will not charge overtime Careful of that water feature Aim the ball and take your time I will be your golfing teacher Hold the club, yes that looks fine I am more than happy to, give you my time Now I am in the bunker How can this be? This is not easy, easy for me Why did I start this, as a hobby? So just remember that I have really tried Now I am prepared Glad I looked in that guide Such a good teacher 28

Ready to show me I'm not disappointed Just want a prize sometime, maybe I cannot deny, no (Really hope the weather stays mild) How many holes left to go (This could take a while) Just come on, come on, there's so much to know I will be your golfing teacher I will not charge overtime Careful of that water feature Aim the ball and take your time I will be your golfing teacher Hold the club, yes that looks fine I am more than happy to, give you my time (So I am gonna play you) Need to find the time I will be your guide I will be your teacher I will be your caddy I am more than happy to give you my time

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I Cannot Sing- Parody of You're Beautiful by James Blunt. This song is rubbish This song is rubbish The words are poor And if I play it She'll think I'm a bore She ignored me on the subway She was in another band I will lose some sleep at night Cause I'm living in my van I cannot sing I cannot sing I cannot sing, it's true I heard this tune, it should be finished soon I don't want to clear the room I'll never sing with you So I'll walk on by And I won't cry She could see from my face that I was Quite a guy And I don't think that I can find my pen I have a bad chorus, I could sing it till the end I cannot sing I cannot sing I cannot sing, it's true I heard my tune, it should finish soon I don't want to clear the room And I'll never sing with you Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blahhhh I cannot sing I cannot sing I cannot sing, it's true There must be an angel With a big suitcase This record could always be replaced But it's time to face the truth I will never sing with you.

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Watching Disney All The Time- Parody of Summer of '69 by Bryan Adams. Watching Disney when I was 9 I saw my first Walt Disney When I had just turned 9 And the front cover was so divine watching Disney all the time. Me and some guys from school we were such real big fans mickey quit and Ariel got married we even had the trading cards oh when I watch it now the cartoons seem to last together and when I had a choice Id keep watching them forever Those were the best days of my life. Ain't no use in watching when you've got a job to do spend my evenings down at the drive in thats when old was new. Standing on your mammas porch you told me we would watch together oh when you put it on I knew that it was Disney forever. Those were the best days of my life. Yeah we were killing time watching extra features we needed to rewind I guess modern films arent that clever, arent that clever-no! But now cartoons are changing look at the characters that have been and gone sometimes when I play the lion king I think about Disney and where it went wrong. Standing on your mammas porch you told me that we would watch together. Yeah when you put it on I know it was Disney forever those were the best days of my life. Watching Disney when I was 9.

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Here's My Wife- Parody of It's My Life by Jon Bon Jovi. Here's my wife This is a song by on Bon Jovi A big hello to those that know me. I am so unbelievably proud she's somewhere in here in this crowd You can hear her answer when she shouts it out loud Here's my wife she is really clever So now we can cook together This is dedicated to my wife (here's my wife) Her name is Sarah by the way But frankly I don't know what else to say This is dedicated to my wife here's my wife This is for my wife who stands her ground As she would stop me from buying another round Singing is getting harder make no mistake But I really like cooking, it is so great. Here's my wife she is really clever So now we can cook together This is dedicated to my wife (here's my wife) Her name is Sarah by the way But frankly I don't know what else to say This is dedicated to my wife Here's my wife Baby your so cool make no mistake look at that driver trying to overtake Here's my wife she is really clever So now we can cook together This is dedicated to my wife (here's my wife) Her name is Sarah by the way But frankly I don't know what else to say 32

This is dedicated to my wife Here's my wife.

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I Am the Best At Making Raspberry Tarts- Parody of When You Say Nothing At All by Ronan Keating. I am the Best at Making Raspberry Tarts. It's amazing How I can make raspberry tarts while its in the oven I can walk in the park Try as I may I can never restrain From going home and doing it over again. The crumbs on your face Let me know that you like it Would you like some choc-ice? Because I know that you'll thank me Cleaning your plate says you like it and you want some more I am the best At making raspberry tarts. All day long I am in the kitchen doing my mum proud. But when I win this competition Ill hold the crown (the crown) Try as they may They could never shine But my dear Victory will be mine. The crumbs on your face Let me know that you like it Would you like some choc-ice? Because I know that you'll thank me Cleaning your plate says you like it and you want some more I am the best At making raspberry tarts. The crumbs on your face Let me know that you like it Would you like some choc-ice? Because I know that you'll thank me Cleaning your plate says 34

you like it and you want some more I am the best At making raspberry tarts. I am the best At making raspberry tarts. I am the best At making raspberry tarts. The crumbs on your face Would you like some choc-ice? Cleaning your plate Lets me know That you want some more. I am the best At making raspberry tarts. I am the best At making raspberry tarts.

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Me and My Band- Parody of Against All Odds by Mariah Carey feat. Westlife. I cant believe I'm singing this, When I stole it from Phil Collins When I started singing every line with you, Your the only one who can sing this at all. How can I just let you sing this part, When all you do is ruin this song, Cause we share the lyrics and the pace even though we know its wrong Your the only one who can really sing this at all So take a look at the song it was never meant to be It was never meant to be two people, Just my band and me. So take a look at this song It was never meant meant to be So getting a no. 1 is against all odds, But that's a chance we've got to take. I wish I could just write some lyrics down Then I wouldn't have to steal your songs I wish I could sing like you then I would really cry Your the only one who could really sing this at all. So take a look at the song it was never meant to be It was never meant to be two people, Just my band and me. So take a look at this song It was never meant meant to be So getting a no. 1 is against all odds, But that's a chance we've got to take. So take a look at this song My conscience is clear But you singing with me is against all odds Its a chance we've got to take. o take a look at the song it was never meant to be It was never meant to be two people, Just my band and me. So take a look at this song 36

It was never meant meant to be So getting a no. 1 is against all odds, But that's a chance we've got to take.

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Bury Picasso- Parody of Brick by Boring Brick by Paramore.

Well look at those oil paintings Meaning is there for us to find The painter has done so well Or am I just losing my mind Just doing this for exposure that I told her The frames are all wrong now He is just messing around with our eyes The nose is the wrong way around Wrong colours for the ground Chorus Well go get your shovel And we'll dig a deep hole To bury Picasso, bury Picasso Go get your shovel And we'll dig a deep hole To bury Picasso, bury Picasso Ba da ba da da ba ba da da ba There are lots of people sighing Crowds are gathering round The closing time came to save us And the shop is on the way out The names won't stick Just takes the mick Well make sure to wisely take your pick It's just a man in a dressing gown The nose is the wrong way around Wrong colours for the ground Chorus Well you built up a world of magic But your paintings are tragic Yeah you built up a world of magic What is the deal I just don't understand All this hype about your art And I'd rather leave it But it's all blue I just can't believe my eyes It's even in the park And it's just not for me, yeah Chorus

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My Ship is On Fire- Parody of Sex on Fire by Kings of Leon. My ship is on Fire King Of Leon: Sex On Fire Parody Hear that old timber Making a sound Smells like it's burning, it's burning Here on the ocean The wind and the rain Is slowly dying, it's dying Yo Ho My ship is on fire Here on the high seas And breaking of waves The fish are diving, they're diving. Some ports are open and there goes a pail Feel like we're sinking, we're sinking But oh no My ship is on fire And oh o We're beginning to perspire Hotter then ever Rather be home I cannot take it Not take it But it will be day soon Yes it's getting light I am the greatest, the greatest, the greatest Yo Ho My ship's not on fire And oh o We've put out this fire And so o We're not going to expire But oh no My ship's not on fire And so o We're not going to expire.

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Going Up- Parody of Rabbit Hearts (Raise It Up) by Florence and the Machine. I look around but I can't find you How quickly the number fades We are stopping, I'm running out time Why can't everyone just behave (going up) You saw a deal and now you have to go on up (going up) (going up) In a pram A rabbit headed girl Is shopping with her mum And seems to be quiet And satisfied And we're going up Here in the lift Please take my advice Check the bill and make sure it's right And men are kind but press in so tight They cannot see any sunlight I'm looking down but I can't find two (going up) If only I could make some space (going up) I started staring at the exit sign (going up) Why can't everyone just behave? I must be calm I've come here for the sale Ready for a fight Before I leave and I am satisfied (we're going up) Here in the lift Please take my advice Check the bill and make sure it's right And men are kind but press in so tight They cannot see any sunlight (going up) (going up) (going up) (going up) And then it rings, the joy it brings And I'm blown away by the price of things My wages turn from black to red As I see an offer on a bed Here in the lift Please take my advice Check the bill and make sure it's right And men are kind but press in so tight They cannot see any sunlight Here in the lift Please take my advice 40

Check the bill and make sure it's right And men are kind but press in so tight They cannot see any sunlight Here in the lift Please take my advice Check the bill and make sure it's right And men are kind but press in so tight They cannot see any sunlight Get in the lift.

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Reading Books- Parody of Bleeding Love by Leona Lewis. Read a book today, I cannot put it down, Couldn't get it down, it's running through my brain, If I put it down, it won't stay open But something happened during chapter two, It's left me on a cliffhanger, I don't know what to do I've read it much, my mind is going crazy, But I don't care about sleep, I'll be keep reading you, Before I put it away, I must lend it to Ruth, My heart is broken as the book store is closing Chorus It will not open Keep reading, keep keep reading books, I keep reading, keep keep reading books, keep reading, keep keep reading books, Trying hard not to cry, but it's the only one around, Their laughter fills my ears, why won't they let me be? Yet I know that the store will keep me from reading But nothings greater than the rush Of going through the entrance And in this store of madness, I win the race Yet everyone around me thinks that I'm going crazy Maybe, maybe 1 x Bridge 1 x Chorus And they're all chasing me Oh they find it's hard to believe I'll be holding this book for everyone to see 1 x Bridge 1 x Chorus Thanks God, it's open So I... 1 x Bridge 1 x Chorus

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