Dei Chochmah LNafshechah

Parshas Ki Tisa

Shalosh Seudos1 of Parshas Ki Tisa 5767

--" , - - -- , : , ".' ,
This they shall give, every one that passes among them that are numbered, half a shekel after the shekel of the sanctuarythe shekel is twenty gerahhalf a shekel for an offering to Hashem.2

Rashi explains: This they shall giveHashem showed Moshe a vision like a coin made of fire whose weight was half a shekel. Hashem said, Like this they shall give. (Midrash Rabbah) It seems as though we need to understand why Hashem showed Moshe a vision of a coin that was specifically of fire. We also need to grasp the connection between Parshas Parah and Parshas Ki Tisa when it is read, as well as why the heifer had to be red in color. The Secret of the Half-Shekel The half shekel represents Zeir Anpin, which parallels the letter vav of the Shem HaVaYaH that serves as the balance point between the upper and lower letters hei of the Divine Name. This balance-point is known as the masklah [mishkal, balance scale], and is the six [gematria of the letter vav] lower sefiros from Chessed until Yesod.3 Since the human form parallels the metaphysical structure of the upper worldsFrom my flesh, I see G-d4this point also has its referent in the human body. The head

1 2

The lesson was delivered at the third meal of Shabbos. Shemos 30:13 3 Zohar II:158a 4 Iyov 19:26 3

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represents the world of Kesser, and the narrow parting that divides the hair that is free of hair is called the plugta dsaarei, the splitting of the hairs, which also assumes the linear form of the letter vav.5 This parting is associated with the half-shekel, the machatzis hashekel offering. The Zohar teaches that six hundred and thirteen pathways branch outward from this parting, and they are the roots of the six hundred and thirteen commandments of the Torah. This area of the head is associated with the aspect of the serpent.6 The Gemara explains that there are male and female aspects of the serpent: the nachash briach and the nachash akalason, the straight serpent and the round surrounding serpent.7 According to the Kabbalists, these two serpents parallel the aspects of mmalei kol almin [that Hashems light fills all worlds] and soveiv kol almin [that Hashems light surrounds all worlds].8 These two aspects are the ways in which Hashem reveals Himself in His universeso the half-shekel which parallels the parting between the two sides of the hair actually embodies the kav or line of light that was extended by Him from His infinite light into the epicenter of the darkness of the vacated space which unites the two aspects. This line is the inner meaning of Kings golden scepter, which brings life to whomever it touches.9 [This is an allusion to the extension of the scepter to Queen Esther when she was in a state of penitence, fasting, and prayer, and approached Achashverosh for a sign of clemency.] The Zohar teaches that the creation of the universe was an aspect of the mana bigula or round vessel, which is represented by the letter yud.10 When Hashem constricted His infinite light, a point of it was left within the sphere of the vacated space, and afterward there was a further constriction within this point that was within the round vessel. This point is the essential expression of Malchus dMalchus [the
Zohar III:136a, 288b, 293a See the writings of Rav Menachem Mendel of Shklov, one of the main disciples of the Vilna Gaon, Likutim #375. 7 Yeshayahu 27:1; Bava Basra 74b 8 See the commentary of the Vilna Gaon to the Sifra DTzniusa, chapter 1. 9 Esther 4:11 10 Zohar II:42
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lowermost aspect of Malchus within Ein Sof], and it is the source and root of all of the revelations of G-dliness to the worlds that exist below it. It is from this point that the line of Hashems light is drawn out to illuminate all the worlds, and it is the middlemost point that unites the aspect of the kav with the aspect of the surrounding sphere. This point parallels the middle parting of the hairs upon which everything depends, and is that which joins the aspects of mmalei kol almin and soveiv kol almin. It is the head of the golden scepter. A New Torah The Torah will come forth from Me...11 The sages commented on this, The Holy One said: A new Torah will come forth from Me.12 The Baal Shem Tov taught on their words that the new Torah of the ultimate post-Messianic future will be from Me. The Torahs revealed teachings are rooted in the light of Binah / Understanding, and its hidden teachings are rooted in the light of Chochmah / Wisdom, however its main revelation in the ultimate future will be from Merooted in the light of Kesser / Crown, and it is the Torah of the direct experience of G-dliness. Whether one will learn the revealed or the concealed aspects of the Torah, he will know how to connect to the King of the universe through that study. It was about such connection that the verse spoke: For forgiveness is with You, in order that they come to fear [You].13 When we will begin to speak and think about Hashem Himself, as we find in the verse: For with You is the source of life,14 our study of the Torahs revealed and concealed aspects will become like garments that enclothe the inner essence of connecting with Hashem. By entering into the mindset of with You, all of our sins will naturally be forgiven. Then, they will come to fear Youall of the world will come to recognize Hashems greatness and power. They will come to see the greatness of Queen Esther, of the Shechinah, and the direct
11 12

Yeshaya 51:4 Vayikra Rabbah 13:3 13 Tehillim 130:4 14 Ibid., 36:10 5

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experience of Hashems light which is itself the light of prophecy that shines forth when one enters into the Kings inner chamber to seek Him out by studying His Torah. Hashem said: Take for Me an offering...15The Holy One said to the Jewish people: The Torah is Mine and you took it; take Me along with it...16 The word Torah originates in the concept of teaching or showing [horaah, moreh], because it demonstrates and reveals Hashems glory among the lower worlds. One must study all aspects of the Torah with the further goal of seeking out Hashems light. As the verse says, And those who blacken themselves [with diligent study] will find Me.17 Those who diligently seek out Hashems light as they study are sure to discover that which seek and come to cling to Hashem and feel His light. This was the entire purpose of the giving of the Torahthat the Jewish people should receive a new heart and a proper spirit, to seek after the innermost point, whether it is by way of the line or by way of the sphere, by way of the squared-off final mem or the rounded-off letter samech. These two letters and the spiritual work that they represent are alluded to in the mask [ ]that Moshe placed over his face to conceal its light.18 [This mask is called the masveh, and the word includes both the mem and the samech.] The first letters of the word represent MaTaT and SaNDaL [two names of angels, or spiritual channels], while the finals letters vav and hei represent Zeir Anpin and Nukvah / Malchus, respectively. Naturally, the mask is more superficial than the face itself, which is actually the point where the direct and inner experience of Hashems G-dliness is expressed upon the person. [Note: In Hebrew, the word for face, panim, is the same as the word for that which is inward, pnim. This is because the face expresses the inner state of connection with Hashem.] This is why Moshe Rabbeinus face shone with light. His direct experience of G-dliness completely rectified the outer skin [of his face], which was a reflection of the rectification of the damage caused by the sin of the Tree of Knowledge.

15 16

Shemos 25:2 Midrash Tanchuma, Terumah 3 17 Mishlei 8:17 18 Shemos 34:33 6

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I Am Black, but Beautiful The half-shekel is a matter that has to do with fire, or as we have already explained the revelation of Hashems light. And the Torah, which is associated with the kav and the half-shekel is likewise a matter of fire and the revelation of His light. And there is an inner point within the machatzis hashekel or the round vessel that parallels the parah adumah or red heifer [whose ashes were used to ritually cleanse those who had come into contact with the dead], which is also fiery redit is the point that joins the aspects of mmalei kol almin and soveiv kol almin, it is the place of Malchus dMalchus within the Ein Sof. This point is the epicenter of tzimtzum or constriction; with respect to the worlds above it, it is the lower level of Malchus, but with respect to the worlds below it, it assumes the aspect of Chochmah. Compared with the worlds above it, it is black and saturated with din and constriction, but compared with the worlds below it, it is beautiful and suffused with Hashems light. This is like Queen Esther, who was ugly on the surface, but who shone with an inner grace that charmed all who saw her.19 I said I will Gain Wisdom, but She is Far from Me One must delve deeply to seek out the meaning of the red heifer, because it is very difficult to grasp. This is meant to teach us that it isnt enough to enter the aspect of the machatzis hashekel, to experience the light of the Torah which is really Hashems light. Rather, one must struggle to gain the innermost point within the machatzis hashekel, which is the point of the red heifer. We learn of the parah adumah that it is two years old [literally, born of two ] because it unites the two aspects of the line and the sphere, of mmalei kol almin and soveiv kol almin, which are masculine and feminine aspects respectively. Everything that has to do with the preparation of the parah adumah involves sevens: seven kohanim, seven washings, etc. The number seven represents the sefirah of Malchus. On the other hand, the parah adumah is associated with Chochmah, like the letter yud that has three apexes that
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Megillah 13a 7

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parallel the three substances that must be used in the preparation of the parah adumah: cedar wood, hyssop, and tolaas shani; the three processes of slaughter, burning, and the gathering of the ashes. Even after a person has studied the Torah and experienced its light, even after he is already considered wise [because he has attained Chochmah vis--vis the lower levels], nevertheless he must seek a higher level of connection and plumb to the innermost point so that he becomes worthy of prophecy, of the direct experience of Gdliness. The Paradoxical Nature of the Parah Adumah This inner point of the parah adumah is the spiritual root of the souls of the Jewish people, and it has a paradoxical nature. The tzaddik, who immerses himself all day long in the fire of the Torah, finds it difficult to lower himself to the souls of the Jewish people [in order to teach them and help them spiritually], however if he fails to do so he lacks the light of prophecy because he is disconnected from this inner point. So he has no choice but to lower himself, and this is how the parah adumah defiles the pure. At the same time, it purifies the impure, because in the act of lowering himself to reach the souls of the Jewish people, he comes into contact with this inner point of the parah adumah which is really the root of all creation and receives a wondrous new level of holiness. The Threefold Rectifications We find in Likutei Moharan that, whenever ayin hara [the evil eye, usually associated with jealousy] prevails in the world, breath is doubled [quickened].20 This doubling of the breath can be understood in the light of the teaching of the Arizal, that the verse, All breath [for every single breath, or for every breath and breath] will praise G-d,21 refers to the joining of MaTaT and SaNDaL [as
20 21

Likutei Moharan I:55 Tehillim 150:6 8

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mentioned earlier]. When ayin hara prevails, there is no real unity between these two spiritual aspects, between the mem and the samech of the masveh, and the root of the problem lies in the three main spiritual blemishes that parallel the three apexes of the yud: heresy, disparagement of the tzaddikim, and licentiousness. These blemishes make it impossible for the tzaddikim to pray properly and activate the aspect of the parah adumah which is associated with prayer. Heresy damages the sefiros of CHaBaD [the uppermost triad of ChochmahBinah-Daas]; licentiousness damages the [middle-level torso triad of the] heart;22 and the shaming of tzaddikim damages the sefiros of Netzach-Hod-Yesod. As the verse says [that Rachel declared after the birth of Yosef HaTzaddik, the paradigm of Yesod], G-d has gathered in my shame...23 When the tzaddikim are denigrated, they cannot shed their light. All of these flaws result in it becoming impossible to properly draw down Divine abundance from the inner source of Malchus, which is the inner point of the parah adumah. However, through the preparation of the parah adumah, these three flaws can be repaired. The cedar wood effects rectifications at the level of CHaBaD, since it tends to be the most distinguished [the cedar is tall and stately] who develop heretical ideas; the hyssop [the smallest and humblest of plants] effects rectifications at the level of Chessed-Gevurah-Tiferes since it is usually the lowlier people who fall into temptation in the realm of personal purity; and the tolaas shani effects repairs at the level of Netzach-Hod-Yesod.24 The slaughter of the parah adumah slaughters all heresies, the burning of its body rectifies the burning heart25 of the person who has fallen in the area of personal purity by transforming all of that fervor and energy into a burning desire for Hashem, and the gathering of the ashes rectifies the denigration of tzaddikimG-d has gathered up my shame...

22 23

He who commits adultery with a woman lacks a heart... (Mishlei 6:32) Bereishis 30:23 24 Likutei Moharan I:55 25 Tehillim 39:4 9

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The Sfas Emes taught that all of these rectifications can be achieved even now through meditating on the inner meaning of the preparation of the parah adumah, and this is all the more true during the days of Purim, when the gates to all of the Torahs inner dimensions are opened. Let Your Soul Know Wisdom Moshe Rabbeinu attained the highest expression of the mask as well as the point of light, the point of the parah adumah, within the mask of the Torahs fire. He embodied both the aspect of Chochmah as well as the aspect of Malchusthe word ( to Moshe) has the same letters as the name Shlomo, the epitome of Malchus. And this is the task of each and every one of us, to attain the innermost point of the parah adumah where Chochmah and Malchus are joined. When a Jew prays, he must rise to the level of CHaBaD and subdue all of the false ideologies that exist, just as when the tzaddik prays he must rise to that level and draw down the light of soveiv kol almin and destroy heresy through his experience that there is nothing but Hashem at all in the universe. Then the tzaddik rises to the place of CHaGaT and rectifies the blemish of illicit desire by meditating on the root of all desire, which is the unalloyed thirst for Hashem Himself. Through experiencing this powerful desire for Hashem, the tzaddik unites the aspects soveiv kol almin and mmalei kol almin, the aspects of the sphere and the line. Then the tzaddik rectifies the blemish of denigrating the tzaddikim by rising to the level of NHY and meditating on the fact that everything in the universe bespeaks Hashems glory. Then he is able to rearrange the words of the detractors of the tzaddikim into new combinations that declare the glory of the King and the greatness of the tzaddikim. Once the tzaddik has made these rectifications, he attains the aspects of dust and ashes of the parah adumah; he is empowered to enter and walk freely through the chambers of the upper world as he prays with those tzaddikim who are already dust, and to experience the temporary sloughing off of his material existence and sense of

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self, as in, And I am dust and ashes.26 Then the body is suited to be a true vehicle for holiness, to express Hashems light. This is the meaning of: "" Let your soul (nefesh) know (dei) wisdom (Chochmah) and it will be a crown (Kesser) for your head.27 Ones prayer must rise to the aspect of the parah adumah, which is the source of both Chochmah and Malchus (nafshecha), and then one will be worthy of receiving the new revelation of Torah which is the crown of the Torah of KesserAtikah Sesimaahwhich is the Torah of the ultimate future. Like Avraham Avinu who nullified all of the false ideologies of his time and merited to reveal that only Hashem exists, the tzaddik constantly reveals Hashems absolute presencethe light of soveiv kol alminin a way that is always fresh and wondrous. May Hashem help us so that, in the merit of such prayer, we become worthy of the new Torah that will come forth from Me, and to see the Shechinah in our hearts as described in the Zohar. And our eyes will see Your Kingship, with the coming of our righteous redeemer, speedily and in our days. Amen.

Translated and Adapted by Rav Micha Golshevsky.

26 27

Bereishis 18:27 From the Shabbos zemer Dror Yikrah, based on Mishlei 24:14. 11

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Nesiv Mitzvosecha, Pathway 3.4: "The main principle in this is that all of the aspects of Mazla which is called Ayin have also an element of Malchus which is called Ani'it acts in accordance with its own opinion'and contains within itself some element of yeish. However, this aspect of Ani [self or awareness of independent existence] is only in sufficient degree to maintain the existence of creation, so that they do not revert to the aspect of Ayin [total subsuming within Ein Sof]. For this reason, a Jew should not hold on to any more of a degree of yeish and Ani than is necessary to maintain his existence. Anything more than that should be banished. And he should humble himself like a hyssop and a worm, and only expand his da'as to the extent that it is necessary for his pure service of Hashem and in order to maintain his physical existence" We are all aware of the sages' statement, "There is no [ ]mazal for the Jewish people."1 Mazal refers to the level of Kesser, and this is why Ayin [ ]is the mazal of the Jewish people. The world of Kesser is our mazal. Within Kesser there is the concept of the Dikna ["beard" with its thirteen points, paralleling the thirteen attributes of mercy], and the Dikna comprises two mazlinupper and lowerand this is why it is referred to as Mazal. [Note: The concept of mazal or Mazal when referring to Kesser is that of a flow of Divine influence that comes from above to below. The root of the word mazal is flowing, like the manner in which liquid flows from above to below.] We learn from the Komarna Rebbe's words cited earlier that each person contains his own levels of Kesser and Malchus, that of Ayin and Ani, because the entire spectrum of the ten sefiros are found within all of us. A person's Kesser-aspect makes him constantly seek to act with self-sacrifice and nullify himself before Hashem, while his Malchus-aspect longs to assert itself and experience its own existence. These two
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Shabbos 156a 12

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inner forces are perpetually in conflict. The tzaddikim are always racing after the level of Ayin, but it is impossible to completely nullify the Ani-force, because it is an integral part of the soul and is necessary for maintaining existence. This is why the tzaddikim insisted that all those who came to them for help in their quest for absolute bitulespecially between the ages of thirty and fifty, which was the period of service of the levi'imshould not make the mistake of shutting themselves away completely from working with others, thinking that this would only feed the Ani. Quite the contrary, they taught. During those years it is vital that a person maintain to some extent his Ani for holy purposes, otherwise his spiritual existence will not survive at all. The Necessary Ani In the world as a whole, the purpose of life is self-seeking, and people exert themselves to make a living or to achieve the prestige of a rosh yeshiva. In general, people become dissatisfied with simply sitting and learning in some kollel, but we cannot look at this from merely a superficial view. The tzaddik knows that the root of this need to "be something" is in Malchus, which is a vessel, and which holds itself to have independent existence. Yet each person also contains a very high sefirah which is the aspect of Kesser, and which tells him that the purpose of existence is only to attain bitul before G-d. The tzaddikim know, however, that the Ani is meant to serve as a vessel for bitul to the Ayin. The two are necessary, but the tzaddikim are not confused about which aspect is meant to serve the other. An average person might be confused when he sees that the tzaddik acquires some beautiful new object, but the tzaddik only acquires it because the object is necessary for his harchavas hada'as, so that his mind will be relaxed and free. There were many tzaddikim who owned beautiful things, and they served as a throne for holiness. Rav Yisrael of Ruzhin certainly did not appreciate the gold and silver that surrounded him for their material sake; his mind was only occupied with dveikus and self-sacrifice constantly. Nevertheless, Hashem made it such that the wealth that
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surrounded him enhanced his harchavas hada'as, and this matter is bound up with many deep secrets. Each person has his own limitswithin the boundaries, that which is necessary for his spiritual life is vital, and anything beyond it is absolutely forbidden. The main purpose is bitul before Hashem, and there is not general rule as to what is needed to maintain a healthy spiritual existence, because it is completely individual. So everyone needs to take their own accounting over the matter and also pray about itbecause selfdeception is easy, and one must not expand his yeish-aspect more than is really necessary, G-d forbid. "And the sign [as to whether he is really acting properly with regard to his yeish-aspect] is if suffering and failure and humiliation and poverty and pain comes upon him, do they also expand his da'as for his Divine service? Does he accept it with love and joy, without any expectation of prestige and pride forthcoming? 'The wood that does not burn with the light of the soul is beaten [i.e. the suffering or 'beating' is meant to bring out more light from the person's soul]'2 and comes to the aspect of Ayin. Then, 'the light of the soul shines within it' without limit, with joy and good-heartedness. But the 'lamp of the wicked' who always follow after the aspect of yeish and ani, 'the serpent tempted me [[ ']the word for tempted is a conjunction of and ]and drew me after the desires of this world, which are nothing but yeish and ani'I will rule' [] and therefore, 'the lamp of the wicked will be put out.'3 They are shamed and humiliated" The main purpose is bitul, and when humiliations and oppression crush a person, it is only so that the light of his soul will shine brighter. Even if a person suffers failures or loses his zest for learning Torah, G-d fobid, he must accept it with love and nullify himself to the state of Ayin. Then his soul will go back to burning with a limitless light, with joy and good-heartedness. The tzaddik is already focused on Ayin and bitul, and this is why obstacles do not throw him when he faces them. He can accept
2 3

Zohar III:168a Mishlei 13:9 14

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everything with love and joy, because the knew from the start that the goal is Ayin. In contrast, "the lamp of the wicked will be put out"because the wicked are self-seeking, the serpents always leads them on to further yeish that is fed by the lusts of this world. This brings to real shame and humiliation. But it is also certain that when the wicked repent, all of the yeish that was wrongly built up will be repaired retroactively. Nesiv Mitzvosecha, Pathway 3.5: "See Eitz Chaim at the end of Sha'ar #39, Drush #14. [Note: This is one of the places in the Eitz Chaim where the Arizal quotes a teaching in the name of Rav Moshe Cordovero. We know that when the Arizal first arrived in Tzfat, he studied with the Ramak.] The sefiros are a direct lightKesser, Chochmah, Binah, Chessed, Gevurah, Tiferes, Netzach, Hod, Yesod, Malchusfrom above to below. And it repeated at the time that it returned to its source, it illuminated and emanated another ten sefiros from below to above: Kesser within Malchus, and Chochmah within Yesod, until Malchus within Kesser. Their end is implanted within their beginnings, and their beginnings within their ends. This relates to the Ani and the Ayin within Malchus" The root of the Torah is, "I [ ]am Hashem their G-d who took them out of the land of Egypt"4 The entire Torah includes the Ani-Ayin, both Kesser and Malchus. But it is important for us to clarify just why Hashem created the aspect of the Ani, when we know that the main thing is the Ayin. The entire purpose of creation is so that Hashem should have a dwelling place in the lower worlds. The only way for a created universe to experience the Ayin of Hashem is through the Ani that is accessible within the created universea lower revelation of His presence which ultimately enables the experience of the higher Ayin. The entire edifice of Kabbalah rests upon this dynamic which appears at first glance to be self-contradictory. The Ani [revealed presence in the lower worlds] seems to be an obstacle, and the ani of created beings also tends to serve as an obstacle to bitul and the experience of the Ayin. Nevertheless, the tzaddik uplifts
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Shemos 29:46 15

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his personal ani as well as that of the world as a whole [its material and independentseeming nature] to the highest Ayin. This causes Hashem's Ayin to be revealed to the highest possible degree. This is why the light of the sefiros descended in the manner of "direct" and "returning" light; so that the elements of Ayin [above to below] and Ani [below to above] would be bound together. The main task of the created being is to take his ani and return with it back to his Source. "So too, in the Kesser, in the three upper 'heads,' and also in Reisha d'lo Isyadah there are the aspects of Malchus-Ani. For this reason, when the lights returned back to Ayin, there remained some very refined element of Ani within them, so that they would not be nullified from their rectified existence. Therefore, even though the reality is that within the three 'heads,' which is the root of all that exists, they returned to Ayin, the root of the Ani, nevertheless in some ultra-refined manner there is, He made there, some small screen that can hold some degree of yeish and ani, so that they should not completely cease to exist. "Every aspect in the world, from the apex of Adam Kadmon until his heels, and down until the crass material of the world of Asiyah, there is within everything that exists an aspect of both ayin and yeish-ani. Through the Torah and the development of good middos, they purify themselves of the ani-yeish and transform it into ayin completely. Then only the slightest degree is sufficient, and he accepts everything with love and joy. 'If I am not for me' [] this is the bonding of ani and ayin, 'who is for me?'in the ultimate future. 'And if I am only for myself' what is my power? Dust and ashes, crass material. This is, in short, all of chassidusto take the ani and make it into ayin. If I don't do this avodah, "Who is for me?" How will I merit the next world otherwise, since the next world is all bitul. Hashem's light only shines upon that which is nullified before Him. And, even so, the slightest bit of ani-Malchus must remain, because the vessel cannot be eliminated completely.

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Nesiv Mitzvosecha, Pathway 3.6: "Know that it is impossible to draw down any additional blessing and shefa from the Ein Sof without absolute bitul to the Ayinsee Eitz Chaim, Sha'ar Mochin d'Tzelem and Sha'ar Kriyas Shema. Every time that one recites Shema and the word Echad, and so too when saying 'King of the universe' in every blessing, the main avodah is to intend to have mesirus nefesh to enter into absolute bitul, because only this can draw down shefa. "One must know that the matter is that there are two joinings up above; one to give life to the worlds and maintain their necessary existence. This joining is constant, because if it would be interrupted for even an instant, all of the worlds would cease to exist. The second joining is in order to bring forth souls" This is mentioned in the writings of the Rashash and the Baal Shem Tov, that it is necessary to make a yichud to draw down Divine vitality into the world, and this is what is meant by bringing forth souls. "And to give mochin and vitality and renewal to Ze'ir and Nukva, the Jewish people, the holy people, which is the innermost essence of the worlds. This union is not constant. The mayin nukvin of Binah needed for the inner mochin must be raised up by the children, by pouring out their souls until they arouse supernal lights." We learn from here that the inner yichud is brought about through the avodah of the Jewish people.

Translated and Adapted by Rav Micha Golshevsky.

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