A very good morning we bid to the Honorable judges, ladies and gentlemen Let us entertain you with our

Wierd, yet hillarious tales About Malaysians

5 big 5 small, 9394 ar ... We ask ourselves, whatever for? Just to note the number plate for a digit win Public toilets Can't live with them Yucks! Can't live without them I think I'm gonna poop! Mummy, mummy! Do you want me to sit or stand on the toilet seat? No, no, darling! At home you seat, outside you stand! Malaysians are somewhat unclear About what goes into where A peep into public toilets AAHHHHH!!!! Confirms your worst nightmare Malaysians We just love to eat Uummm ... We munch and crunch Chomp and chew Through a feast of foood Check out the delicacies! We have The spiciest The sweetest Most sour And most bitter of food Nasi lemak Chappati Sizzling steak Char kuey teow Roti canai Satay High teas ang buffet galores Bring kiasus to the fore Piling their plates with soooo much food Still they come for more For more And more And more! Just to get their money's worth The results From size S to XXL XXL to ... You get the point? Obesity Diabetes Heart diseaees

Idiosyncrasies of Malaysians Huh? What's that? Little personal behaviors or nature Peculiar to Malaysians Funny but it's true That these observations we make Can be about you Malaysians by large ooze charm and care Sensitive and mature We compromise And we share But why is it Malaysians, when behind the wheels Mutate into monsters! Rude ... Selfish ... Dangerous ... Racing taxis, noisy cars Rushing here, rushing there Rushing here and everywhere! Immature road bullies Who smash windscreens and bones While hooting honking drivers Impatiently groan BEEP! BEEP! Eh! I signaled what! Signal your own side lah! My car my space what! Oh, dear! Is this KL? Look at how they speak! Sshhhhh !!!!! No wonder, KL is the third rudest city in the world We have drivers Who turn highways into Formula One track Hey, guys! I am better than Michael Shumacher! Fleeting motorcyclist Who zig zag their way to death Vroom ~ ~ Vroom ~ ~ Motorists suddenly slow down Necks outstretch Eyes affixed ACCIDENT ~ ~ ACCIDENT ~ ~ Eh, somebody call the ambulance! Wah, accident ah? Eh, go buy toto and magnum!

(doopdoop ~ ~ doopdoop ~ ~ tooooot ~~~~) But then Every we look we see Diet pills Surgeries It doesn't make sense Why don't we just exercise? There's a time in the year Where Malaysians behave a little queer Yesss! The sales are here! Megasales up to 30, 50, 70 percent of discounts (~ Gasp ~) Buy 2 get 1 free! Shop 'til you drop! Run out of money? Not to worry! We have American Express Visa Card Master card One for every occasion! Spend, spend, spend Bills, bills, bills Enjoy now Regret later Malaysians have a complex that Much is more Bigger is better Taller is terrific! Thus, we have The tallest Twin Towers The longest canopy walking The largest cooking contest The biggest mooncake (~ Gasp ~) Wait! Not forgetting the number of trees planted A hundred thousand trees a minute See, we have them all If we can't make it To the Guiness Book of Records The Malaysian Book of Records will do, thank you! Having heard our view Won't you say Malaysians are Peculiar in their nature and behavior? However These idiosyncrasies For better or worse

In sickness and in health Oi, no marriage ceremony lah! Oops! Mark us as Malaysians As we stamp our identity That makes us Malaysians Malaysian!

ALL GROUP1 GROUP2 GROUP3 SOLO IN THUNDER AND LIGHTNING, HERE WE COME! LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, WE ARE THE CHILDREN OF TODAY PRESENT TO YOU, A BETTER TOMORROW MALAYSIA IS A MULTI-RACIAL COUNTRY COUNTRY THAT BELONGS TO ALL MALAYSIANS WITH A SHARED HISTORY AND A BELIEF IN A SHARED FUTURE U-N-I-T-Y [SOLO] UNITY! ONLY A FIVE-LETTER WORD, YET THE FOUNDATION OF MULTI-RACIAL MALAYSIA. A CULTURAL MELTING POT UDAH MAKAI, NUAN? A UNIQUE HERITAGE OF DIFFERENT RACES SELAMAT HARI RAYA! GONG XI FA CAI! GAYU GERAI NYAMAI! DIWALI VARTIKAH! A HARMONIOUS BLEND UNLIKE ANY IN OTHER WORLD.

MALAYSIA, TRULY ASIA!

WEVE DANCE FROM JOGET TO NGAJAT ALL SWAYING BEAUTIFUL TO OUR ANGKLONG

IN OUR BAJU KURUNG, CHEONGSAM AND SARI WE HAVE MALAYSIANS WHO HAVE MADE US PROUD MALAYSIANS LOVE THEIR FOOD THE MENU FOR BREAKFAST, LUNCH AND DINNER WILL BE AS VARIED AS ITS PEOPLE CHAR KUEY TIAW! ROTI CANAI! NASI LEMAK! AND THE TARIK! DONT FORGET THE KING OF FRUIT THE DURIAN! EEEEEEE! [P] NICE LA~ [L] WHAT ABOUT THE SAGO WORMS? YUKS! NOT OUR CUP OF TEA! HEY! THEY ARE DELICIOUS AND NUTRITIONS OUR FAMOUS SARAWAK KEK LAPIS CAN BE EXPORTED TO THE REST OF THE WORLD, YOU KNOW! SO DEFINED SO REFINE SO DIVINE THE RANGE IS TOTALLY OUT OF THE WORLD! MALAYSIANS, WE MUST HAVE THE SENSE OF FAIRNESS, A COMMON SENSE APPROACH TO THE WORLD PEOPLE WILL SHARE IF THEY HAVE THEIR FAIR SHARE THEY WILL LISTEN IF THEY ARE LISTENED TO SO, WE MUST CREATE A NATION WHERE THERE IS A FAIR ASHARE FOR ALL AND WE, MUST LISTEN, DISCUSS AND HOLD ONTO OUR SHARED BELIEF OF BEING TRULY

ONE MALAYSIA! FROM BULLOCK CARTS TO GEN-2 STEAM LOCOMOTIVES, MONORAILS AND [PAUSE] BELIEVE IT OR NOT! RM 9.99 AIR TICKETS TO BALI! NOW, EVERYONE CAN FLY! TRAVELLING HAS BECOME A BREEZE OUR FAMOUS PETRONAS TWIN TOWERS [G 1 & 2] WAH! A SYMBOL OF OUR ASPIRATIONS CYBERSPACE HAS BECOME AN IMPORTANT PLATFORM FOR PEOPLE TO GET WHAT THEY WANT ITS PREFERRED CHOICE AMONG THE YOUNGER GENERATIONS [ LIKE US! ] HERE WE COME WITH OUR HANDSOME ANGKASAWAN[G2 & 3] [OHH~~] A SMAL STEP FOR DR.SYEIKH MUSZAFFAR A GIANT LEAP FOR ALL MALAYSIANS HE IS THE SYMBOL OF THE POSIBBLE IF HE CAN DO IT SO CAN WE! WE, THE YOUTHS OF MALAYSIA WANT A COUNTRY FOUNDED ON SECURITY, PEACE AND PROSPERITY UPHOLDING THE PRINCIPLES OF OUR RUKUN NEGARA WE WANT FORWARD-THINKING MALAYSIANS TO MEET THE CHALLENGES OF GLOBALISATION LET US WORK TOGETHER HAND IN HAND TO CREATE A BETTER TOMORROW ONE VOICE, ONE HOPE, ONE NATION

ONE MALAYSIA!
ALL-Good morning,Good morning,Good morning!!! ALL-We would like to present to you...... ALL-The Malaysian Unique and Unbelievable Lifestyles ALL-Ladies and gentlemen, ALL-Boys and girls, ALL-Join us for a journey, A-A flight to reality C-Yap,some people say B-Reality bites(Ouch!) ALL-Yet,it's true! ALL-True,it's true! B(solo)-So please,oh please ALL-Bear with us till the last B-Coz it's the Malaysian reality ALL-That we shall now reveal C-Open any travaller's magazine ALL-And pronto!Find MALAYSIA-Malaysia! B-You'll see broad wide smiles B(solo)-Of the numerous praises A(solo)-Continuous Compliment ALL-Of Our A&C-Natural green paradise B&C-Swaying coconut trees A&B-And pretty warm ladies with firgure looking good...[wow] ALL-But in reality,we have our very own unique ALL-Unbelievable and sometimes ALL-Disgusting lifestyles C-And now our first stop."The Habit of Throwing Rubbish into Malaysian Rivers" B(solo)-"Uh,hello Inspector Mazlan.This is Aleeza here.Can you come over to Sungai Pahang?" B(solo)-"What's up,Leeza?Anything fishy going on up there?" B(solo)-"Well,we have found something strange floating here!" C-It's an alien! A-It's a UFO! B-It's a fridge! ALL-A fridge???? ALL-A fridge in Sungai Pahang? ALL-Our once clean and fresh rivers A-Now they are huge rubbish dumps A&B-From toilet tissues to human faeces, A&C-Steering wheels to old TVs, A-corpses B-steel beds C-and even worse,ALL-

aeroplane wreckage A-Next comes our second unique lifestyles: ALL-"The Public Toilets Dilemma" A&C-Flush!B(solo)-Boom! C-"Welcome to Malaysian aromatic public toilets,Aloha!" B-"Only 20 cents for that sweet,nauseating experience!" A-"What?I do not know you have petai and jering air fresheners in here." ALL-Petai and jering?Are those the latest fragrances from Greek?Well,no!They are from Grik!Grik,Perak! B(solo)-We are for cleanliness A(solo)-"Keep our toilet clean" C(solo)-"Dont throw the sanitary napkin into the toilet bowl" ALL-But we never practise them C-They always end up as slogans ALL-look at our A-ugly,dirty and smelly public toilets B&C-Another Malaysian disgraceful scene! A-The smell makes you sick and dizzy B&C-You feel like vomiting and fainting A&B-The very moment you step in C-Instanly you feel like jumping out! ALL-Third,another Malaysian rare lifestyles:"The Dumping Babies Mania." C-Babies A-Babies B-Babies ALL-Cute,cuddly,gentle and chubby A(solo)-Oh!What a pity,these innocent A-But punished babies C-Dumped around like some kind of rubbish A-In the dustbin B-In the toilet C-At the lane A-On the train ALL-And some even in the drain A(solo)-"Mummy,mummy why did the mothers throw their babies everywhere?" C(solo)-"Coz they didn't want the babies. A(solo)-"Why is that so? ........................................................................... ALL-That's another Malaysian darkest side! B-We have told you the truth C-The whole truth, A-And nothing but the truth ALL-So,dont you feel horrible,terrible and unbearable? C-Dont you feel like choking us to death? A-Or yelling out,ALL-"Shut up!" ALL-We assure you that

B-With the Malaysian educational system A&B-That stresses on moral values and etiquettes like C-Dilligence! B-Politeness! A-Sharing! C-Loving! BKindness! A-Honesty! A-You can expect B-Today's youngsters and our future Malaysians C-To be more caring and more responsible citizens A-We will give our best A&B-To make Malaysia ALL-A cleaner,safer and better B&C-Place to live in ALL-"Ask not what the country can give you but ask what you can give to your country" B-For that, A&C-We must beat the odds and be the best(the best) A&B-As a people,as a nation B&C-Let's live as one A-United,undivided, C-As the saying goes: ALL-"All for one and one for all A&C-Together we move on with full spirit and zest! ALL-Malaysia can do it,yeah