Shijie: WHAT is the first thing that comes to mind when you think about teenagers?

Rebellion, bad attitude and trouble? Teens get a lot of bad press. All too often, publicity about teenagers highlights the ones in trouble: the Mat Rempit, the runaways and the lawbreakers. You rarely hear about the hospital volunteers and the camp counsellors. Why is this so; what is happening? A teenager, or teen, is a young person whose age is between thirteen and nineteen (13-19). They are called teenagers because their age number ends in "teen. Teenagers go through a lot of physical and mental changes during this time. This is called adolescence or puberty. With the onset of puberty, a few things happen to teenagers. Mengyew: As hormones are being released by their bodies, secondary body characteristics develop. Girls begin to menstruate and boys vocal chords start to change. Hair grows in private parts. They become very self-conscious and sensitive. Emotionally, they can be as unpredictable as the weather, going from sunshine one moment to thunderstorm the next. One reason could be the raging hormones. The other may be due to internal self-conflict because of an identity crisis. The frustrating part is, much as we want to know why they are exhibiting such erratic emotions, they may have absolutely no idea themselves. Truth is, sometimes there is just no reason at all. As a result, their non-responsiveness may come across as bad attitude. Waihong: Socially, they go through a process known as individuation, which is becoming an individual. For this to happen, they feel an urge to be separated from their parents and identify themselves with their peers. This is their way of showing the world that they have grown up. For this reason, they do not like to be seen with their parents or be shown too much affection openly by their parents. Hence, friends become very important to them. They need to identify themselves with their peers in order to find themselves. Thats why we often see teenagers having the same hairstyle, carrying the same bag or even having the same tattoo or body piercing at the same spot! Instinctively, we try to regain control while they assert their individuality. Letting go can be difficult. Zeyuan: The human brain is not fully developed by the time a person reaches puberty. Adolescence is also a period where the frontal brain goes through major construction. The teenager now moves from concrete reasoning to abstract thinking. In essence, they are migrating from a black-and-white world to a world of grey and shades of grey. Before, everything was absolute. Now, they discover the realm of relativity They also have a quest for things spiritual and philosophical. They ask questions like What is the meaning in life? and Is there really a power bigger than myself? It can be totally confusing for them. For that matter, some of us adults are still confused, asking and searching for answers ourselves. Shijie: Our teenage children really dont care how much we know until they know how much we care. When we begin to see things from their perspective and understand what they are going through, we will then be able to go down to their level, learn to let go gradually, and connect with them meaningfully.