Listening Skills

By Prof. Devika Trehan

Time spent communicating

Based on the research of: Adler, R., Rosenfeld, L. and Proctor, R. (2001) Interplay: the process of interpersonal communicating (8th edn), Fort Worth, TX: Harcourt.

Fast Facts
We listen at 125-250 wpm, think at 1000-3000 wpm. 75% of the time we are distracted, preoccupied or forgetful. 20% of the time, we remember what we hear

More than 35% of businesses think listening is a top skill for success.
Less than 2% of people have had formal education with listening

 But not practiced effectively

70% of all communication is

Misunderstood Misinterpreted Rejected Distorted Not heard

WHAT IS LISTENING?
If you ask a group of people to give a one word description of listening, some would say hearing.

BUT LISTENING
Is following and understanding the sound---it is hearing with a purpose.

DEFINITION OF LISTENING
The process of receiving, constructing meaning from, and responding to spoken and/or nonverbal messages; to hear something with thoughtful attention

Listening vs. Hearing

Hearing- physical process; natural; passive

Listening- physical & mental process; active; learned process; a skill Listening is hard!

You must choose to participate in the process of listening.

LISTENING IS.. ACTIVE EMOTIONAL GETTING DEEP IN THE EXPERIENCE I KNOW and I CARE ABOUT YOU

HEARING IS.. PASSIVE PASSIONLESS NEVER GETTING BEYOND THE GLOSSY EXTERIOR. I ONLY CARE ABOUT ME AND I DON'T EVEN WANT TO KNOW YOU.

Listening is a conscious activity based on three basic skills:

1) Attitude 2) Attention 3) Adjustment

1)Attitude Maintain a constructive Attitude

2)Attention

Strive to pay Attention Cultivate a Adjustment capacity for

3)Adjustment

Listening is needed everywhere

Listening skills form the basis of: Continued learning Teamwork skills Management skills

Negotiation skills
Emotional intelligence

Listening is needed everywhere

better understand assignments and what is expected of you; build rapport with co-workers, bosses, and clients;

show support;
work better in a team-based environment;

resolve problems with customers, co-workers, and bosses;

answer questions; and

find underlying meanings in what others say.

LISTENING PROCESS
UNDIVIDED ATTENTION HEARING

UNDERSTANDING

INTERPRETING

EVALUATING

EMPATHIZING

GOOD Listening

BAD Listening

BAD Listening
is a form of nonlistening in which someone only pretends to listen when they really are not.

POOR/ BAD Listening

Not Paying Attention

Pseudolistening.

Listening But Not Hearing Rehearsing. Interrupting Hearing What is Expected Feeling Defensive Listening for a Point of Disagreement

GOOD Listening
Good listening is an essential part of being an effective communicator. You cannot be an effective communicator unless you are a good listener.

Active or GOOD Listening

Concentration Attention Eye contact Receptive Body Language Und. of Communication Symbols.

Active or GOOD Listening

Objective Restating the message. Questioning/Clarifying. Empathy - not sympathy Don't Interject. Leave the Channel Open. You can not listen while you are talking

Active listeners speak 30% of the time and listen 70% of the time. Sometimes, we have to try hard not to interrupt the only acceptable reason is to clarify or confirm what has been said.

Why is active listening difficult?

When people are preoccupied with current life stresses or difficult situations, it is hard for them to listen. Anxiety can make it hard to listen. Being angry at the person who is talking also makes it hard to listen. Having an idea in mind of what a person should do makes it hard to listen to that person's point of view.

ACTIVE LISTENING BARRIERS

EXTERNAL BARRIERS

INTERNAL BARRIERS
Internal

Barriers Within The Listener

Internal

Barriers Within The Speaker

External Barriers noises clutter other interruptions

Internal Barriers Within the Listener

Comparing Personal Experience Automatic Talking Mind-Reading Judging Day Dreaming Perceptual Errors

Barriers Within the Speaker Expectations Avoidance Speaking in Code Boundary

 Barriers to Listening
Equate With Hearing
Uninteresting Topics Speakers Delivery External Distractions Mentally Preparing Response

Listening for Facts

Personal Concerns

Personal Bias
Language/Culture Differences Faking Attention