PRESENTATION FOR PARENTS &

Bullying is

intentional written, verbal or physical act, including b

not limited to one shown to be motivated by any
acteristic such as race, color, religion, ancestry, natio
origin, gender, sexual orientation, mental or physical
ability, or other distinguishing characteristics, when t
intentional act:

Physically harms a student or damages his/her proper

b) Substantially interferes with the students educatio

Is so severe, persistent or pervasive that it creates a

intimidating or threatening educational environment

Or substantially disrupts the orderly operation of a sch

Simply stated, bullying

Is intimidating or subjecting a person to
hostility or ill treatment .
Involves actions which cause another person
to feel afraid, humiliated, embarrassed,
threatened or shamed.
Occurs in a relationship in which there is an
imbalance of power.
Is repeated over time

Bullying Happens in Five Ways:

erbal: Teasing, jokes, ignoring/isolation, gossip, threat

hysical: Blocking someones path, physical restraint

pushing/kicking, hazing

Sexual: Teasing, touching, slapping, pictures, emails,

graffiti, sexual assault

Property: Hiding belongings, theft, arson, extortion,

vandalism, destruction

nline: Cyberbullying is a type of bullying that happen

online or through text messages or emails.

Bullying is NOT
A normal childhood
activity
A rite of passage
The targets fault

Differentiating Bullying from Normal

Peer Conflict/Mean Behavior:
Normal conflict/mean behavior
Equal power or are friends
Happens occasionally
Accidental
Not serious
Equal emotional reaction
Not seeking power
Remorse-will take responsibility
Effort to solve the problem

Bullying
Imbalance of power
Repeated negative actions
Intentional
Physical or emotional harm
Unequal emotional reaction
Seeking control/material things
No remorse-blames target
No effort to solve the problem

the target, bullying is a loss experien

LOSS of safety
LOSS of self-esteem
LOSS of belonging
LOSS of control over their own life

Effects of Bullying on the

Target:
Physical Effects
Stomach aches
Weight loss/gain
Headaches
Drop in grades
Drug or alcohol use
Sexual activity
Physical aggression
Suicidal
Homicidal

Emotional Effects
Alienation
Low self-esteem
Insecurity
FEAR
Depression
Withdrawn
Aggression

Warning Signs that your child may be the

target of bullies:

quently teased, taunted belittled, ridiculed, intimidat

threatened, dominated or subdued
Has a derogatory nickname

egularly has bruises or injuries that cant be explaine

Has belongings taken or damaged
Few or no close friends at school

MORE Warning Signs:

Frequently socially isolated
Less assertive or lacks the skills to respond to
others teasing or
Harassment
Appears weak or easily dominated
Tries to stay close to a teacher or other adult at
recess or breaks

Talk with your child about bullying!

What To Do if you suspect your child

is being bullied:
Talk with your child

ur child is being bullied, they need to have a voice in

the situation is handled.

Contact the school

t up a meeting with your childs teacher(s) or counsel

nsider including the school resource officer if applicab

elop a plan for keeping your child safe, particularly du

vulnerable times (class breaks, lunch, recess).
out what activities or counseling options are available
your child.
ntact police or school resource officer if the actions ar
criminal (assault, theft, serious threats, vandalism

Recommendations if you suspect your child is

being bullied:
Dont encourage your child to fight back
two wrongs dont make a right!

en to your child, do not ignore your childs plea for he

Dont confront the parents or the other child directly.

id bringing your child and the bully together to elicit

apology or resolve the issue.

What about the bully?

es show that children identified as bullies by age 8 ar

times more likely to be convicted of a crime by age 24

of kids characterized as bullies in the 6th-9 th grade ha

least one criminal conviction by age 24.

ullies are five times more likely to end up with a seriou

criminal record by age 30.

Contributing Factors Associated with Bullying

Family Factors
Lack of attention and warmth
Modeling of aggressive behavior at home
Poor supervision

Individual Factors
Active, impulsive personality
Lack of empathy for others
Craves attention and approval from others

School

School climate is perceived as uncaring or indifferent

achers/staff unaware or unclear of bullying definitions
how to respond

What motivates a bully?

Bullies prey on an imbalance of power.
They may be seeking attention.

They need to make themselves feel more important.

ey need a particular reaction from the other members

of the group.

llies believe their behavior is exciting and makes them

more popular.

What motivates a bully?

They may be coping with a loss.

They may have an active and impulsive temperament.

They may be victims of bullying/abuse.

hey may see violence modeled at home or elsewhere i

their lives.
They may have low self-esteem.

Warning Signs that your child may be

bullying others:
Frequent name-calling
Regular bragging
A need to always get his/her own way

Spending more time with younger or less powerful kid

A lack of empathy for others
A defiant or hostile attitude, easily takes offense
Frequent misbehavior at school

What To Do if you suspect your child

may be bullying others:

Talk with your child

ever condone bullying behavior; speak up and tell your child tha
the behavior they are engaging in is considered bullying.

Encourage empathy for others

nd your child that everyone has a right to be themselves, to cho
their own friends and to feel safe at school.
Review consequences of bullying behavior
Both discipline consequences and relationship consequences
Reinforce respectful behaviors at home
Help your child deal with feelings in positive ways
Contact the school for help
Set up a meeting with your childs teacher(s) or counselor.
Develop a plan for change.

School Interventions/Consequences for

Bullying:
Warning
Verbal and written
Permanently documented
Coaching/Intervention
Anger Management, Conflict Resolution/
Communication/
Problem Solving Skills, Diversity Training during
school or before, during, or after school detention.
May be provided by administrators, teachers,
counselors,
school psychologists, or school resource officers

What is Cyber bullying?

Cyber bullying- a means of using
online resources to tease,
humiliate, embarrass, harass, and
intimidate people on the Internet.
Cyber bullying is a serious social
problem that needs to be
addressed by parents.
Remember just because it happens
on the Internet does not diminish
the destructive impact it has on
children.

Few examples of Cyber Bullying:

A threatening e-mail , nasty Instant
Messages
Repeated notes sent to the cell phone
A website set up to mock others
Borrowing someones screen name
and pretending to be them while
posting a message
Forwarding supposedly private
messages, pictures, or video to others.
Posting derogatory videos and
pictures online

Why do kids cyber bully each

other?
Cyber bullying is often motivated by
frustration, anger, revenge or
entertainment.
Most kids who cyber bully dont think it
is a big deal because it occurs online.
Many kids mistakenly believe that
because the communication is online
that is harmless, funny and that they
will never get caught.
Many students do not think about the
consequences of their actions.

Possible consequences of cyber bullying:

The impact on a childs psyche can be enormous.
They get the feeling that their life is ruined, that
their reputation is destroyed forever and that they
will have to live with the defamation for the rest of
their lives.

How do you know if someone is being

cyberbullied?
Here are some signs to look out for:
Long hours on the computer
Is secretive about Internet activities
Behavioral changes
Won't say who they are talking to
May find unexplained pictures on computer
Trouble sleeping
Stomach and headaches, lack of appetite, throwing up
Fear of going to out of the house
Crying for no apparent reason
Lack of interest at social events that include other students
Complains of illness before school or community events often
Change in attitude, dress or habits
Unexplained broken personal possessions, loss of money
Stories that don't seem to make sense
Acting out aggression at home

your child to communicate. If an adult or a child someone is being cyber bullied,

the bullying behavior as a problem your child has to live with. The bullying beha
the responsibility of the bully, not the child being bullied

What should you as a parent do if your

child is cyberbullied? :
Inform the school principal or teacher if the
bullying is school related.
Save all messages for evidence.
Inform police if threatened with harm.
Stress to your kids that what is written on the
Internet is on there permanently!!

What can parents do to help their

child?
Be an advocate for your child.
Teach your child to be an advocate for
him/herself.
Know your kids passwords.
Look for any changes in behavior.
Monitor your childs computer use.

How to approach the school:

Every school should have a very specific policy on dealing
with bullying. The schools anti-bullying policy should
state who your first point of contact should be. Telephone
the school and request an appointment with the
appropriate person or the Principal.
Have your facts prepared;
Names of children involved and of witnesses. Your
son/daughter may not be the only one being bullied
The nature of the incident/s
Dates, times and locations of incidents
At the meeting:
Ask to have the incident investigated.
Ask what support the school can offer your son/daughter,
e.g. counseling or supervised mediation between the
parties if appropriate.
What action will be taken to protect your child from

Thank you for your attention.

Together we can win the fight
against bullying.
Please visit the website www.Think2xTwice.org for more info about
workshops or to make a donation towards our efforts.
Visit these additional websites for Bully Resources:
Think2xTwice.org sponsored site:
http://www.nowaytobullying.webs.com/
Resources to keep your kids safe= www.kidpower.org
Help in a bullying situation= www.bullyhelp.org
If someone you know is being bullied or is bullying others=
www.stopbullying.gov
Cyber bullying info= www.cyberbullyhelp.com
Someone you know is being bullied or is bullying others
www.stopbullyingnow.com
Bully policies and report by state= www.bullypolice.org