COUPLE SEMINAR

Philippine Pentecostal Holiness Church, Inc.

Diego Silang, Diffun , Quirino
May 27, 2016

1. Introduction
Marriage is next to Salvation. Your life time partner is also your life
time partner in faith.
Become one- means one even in faith. Ruth 1:16-17.
You may progress or retrogress in everything because of your spouse.
Eccl. 4:9-11.
Marriage will be a lifetime CELEBRATION or a lifetime BATTLE.
Ecclesiastes. 9:9, Proverbs 21:9.
Seminar like this is indeed a crucial need of every couple. It is the
time to remember your vows and commitments, time to renew,
refresh vows and commitments of couples.

How many of you have been married for 10 years, 25 years, 40 years
and 50 years?
How do you assess now your relationship?
Truth; There is NO perfect husband wife relationship at the start of
marriage or few Years after marriage.
A becoming better and sweeter relationship between husband
and wife is the Product of LOVE IN ACTION as years pass by.

I .CAUSES OF CONFLICTS IN MARRIAGE

(If not understood and manage well according to Godly standards)

I .CAUSES OF CONFLICTS IN MARRIAGE

(If not understood and manage well according to Godly standards)
A. Gods design differences between man and woman:
1. Physical differences;
a. Women have 3 very important physiological functions totally absent
from men-Menstruation, pregnancy and lactation.
b. Womens blood contains more water (20% fewer red cells) that supply
oxygen to the body. Tendency is, women tires more easily and prone to
faint.
c. Generally, men are stronger than women in brute strength because
40% of mans body weight is muscle, 23% of a womans.
d. Blood pressure of women is 10 points lower those men (72 HB per
minute versus 80 heart beat per minute). Women have fewer tendencies
to HBP, at least after menopause.
e. Women can withstand high temperature better than men because their
metabolism slows down less.

I .CAUSES OF CONFLICTS IN MARRIAGE

(If not understood and manage well according to Godly standards)
A. Gods design differences between man and woman:
2. Brain/Psychological/ Emotional differences
a. Many men are sharply left-brain dominant, while women tend to be
more evenly balanced between left and right brain processing. Because of
this, women have better communication and language skills and
emotional intelligence. Women speak with emotion and are better in
building human relationship.
b. When faced with stressful situations, men usually employ fight or
flight tactics, while women use a tend or befriend response that is
rooted in their natural instinct in caring for their children and
establishing strong group bonds. Women can manage stress better than
men. Women can smile more than men, even in unhappy situation, can
easily cry and sympathize.

3. Sexual differences
a. A womans sexual drive tends to be related to her menstrual cycle,
while mans drive is fairly constant.
b. A woman is stimulated more by touch and romantic words. She is far
more attracted by a mans personality, while a man is stimulated by
sight.
c. Man needs little or no preparations for sex, a woman often needs hours
of emotional and mental preparation. Harsh or abusive treatment can
easily remove her desire for sexual intimacy for days at a time. Women
feel they are like prostitutes when they are forced to make love while
feeling resentment toward their husband.

c. Women tend to be more personal than men. Women have a deeper

interest in people and feelings-building relationship, while men tend to
be more challenge-and-conquer oriented-competing for dominance.
Hence their strong interest in sports such as football and boxing.
d.Men tend to be less desirous and knowledgeable in building
relationships, both with God and with others. This may be the one of the
reasons why God said in Genesis 2:18 It is not good for man to be alone;
I will make him a helpmeet (completer) suitable for him. So, the wife is
greatly needed by the husband in fulfilling the two greatest
commandments in Mark 12:30-31.

B. Fires in Marriage
F- finances- the wife is the treasurer, the husband is the auditor. The best : Husband
And wife should talk together all finances.
I-Intention- secret intention kills relationship while Transparency promotes relation
Ship.
R-romance-as said women needs physical touch and romantics words.
E-expressions- not only in words but more on actions.
S-seductions- be not the object of temptation. Example: Seductive ways of wearing
Dresses, holding the hands of the opposite sex not your partner, secret
Interaction with opposite sex not your partner, emotional bonding. Let
Your spouse POLICE you. If your partner is not comfortable with any
Relationship you have with the opposite sex cut it off immediately.
If these fires in marriage are not manage well. It will really become fires
That burn and consume good marital relationship.

II .BIBLICAL SOLUTIONS: Isaiah 1:18; 1 Corinthians 7:33

1. Checkpoints 6, 8, 10
.

Checkpoint 6- 1 Corinthians 6:12-20

Is it for my own good as a purchased Temple of God?

Checkpoint 8- I Corinthians 8:9

Is it for the good of others (My Wife)?

Checkpoint 10- I Corinthians 10:31

Is it for the glory of God?

2. 5 Love in Action Marital Duties

5 S of Marital Duties
Husband and wife are the JOINED TOGETHER PERSONS in the
Bible.They should, therefore, be doing all things together in Jesus name in order
to make their marriage a LIFETIME CELEBRATION.
a. Serve God with your mate.
Psalm 127:1 says Except the Lord build the house, they labour in vain.
Without God, relationship of husband and wife will fail.
Family worship, devotion and prayer are the pre-requisite of
regular family Church attendance. Parents are the spiritual
models of their children.

b. Study your mate.

Remember your vows for better or for worse
Study the likes, dislikes, strengths, weakness, moods of your mate and
consider The differences between man and woman. These will make you
understand better, communicate better with your mate.
When faults or mistakes are committed, the one who commits should say
sorry And ask for forgiveness before the sun goes down- Ephesians 4:26.
Do correction at the right time, right place and right manner. Husbands
appreciate your wives daily. Wives are not only mothers, housekeepers but
also bread earners in the family. Some wives are earning more income than
their husbands. Genuine words of appreciation will encourage them more
to become better spouses.

c. Share plans with your mate.

Both the husband and wife should plan together for the good of their
relationship and their family. Projects, family occasions or activities.
Remember the ONE ANOTHER commandments. None of the spouse is
excluded
d. Sexually fulfill your mate.
This is not malicious. Sex within the bound of marriage is Gods blessing.
This is the content of the Song of Solomon.
Survey shows: 20% to 25% of adult women express negative or lukewarm
attitude toward sex.
20% to 25% of adult women demonstrate an excited attitude.
40% to 50% of adult women register average sexual interest.
Remember women are made ready by touch and romantic
Words. For healthy men, there is no problem.

e. Support your mate.

This refers to leadership roles in the family as stated in Ephesians 5:22-25.
Husbands love your wives. Wives submit to your husbands in everything.
Love is giving and giving brings life. Submission of wives to the leadership
of husbands limit only to things for the good of the family and the
relationship.

3. Applying the ONE ANOTHER commandments.

Love one another- John 13:34
Bear one anothers burden- Galatians 6:2
Forbearing one another in love- Ephesians 4:2
Be kind one to another Ephesians 4:32
Forgiving one another Ephesians 4:32
Admonishing one another- Colossians 3:16
Comfort one another -1 Thessalonians 4:18
Edify one another 1 Thessalonians 5:11
Exhort one another Hebrew:13
Confess your fault to one another-James 5:16
Pray for one another-James 5:16
Have compassion with one another- 1 Peter 3:18
Minister to one another- 1 Peter 4:10

THANK YOU FOR INVITING US!!!!

GOD BLESS YOU ABUNDANTLY!!!