Académique Documents
Professionnel Documents
Culture Documents
When I carefully placed one foot then the other on the soil of
France, I was no less moved than the first person on the moon.
Despite the sweater I had donned before exiting the plane, the
enfil avant de sortir de l'avion, le froid est tomb sur moi avec
to see more whites, but at first glance, there were no more than
her gaze across the crowd, with the clear and confident air of
immediately.
disant
de ne pas bouger, qu'elle revenait tout de suite.
27
Hello sir.
My new dad! To believe that I had had an old and that we had
Bonjour monsieur.
just replaced him. Small for a man, blacker than Man Ya, a little
plus noir que Man Ya, un peu maigre, il n'avait pas beaucoup de
cheeks. His scent wrapped around my ears and then stuck into
who were waiting for their luggage. It was not a perfume from
mixed with the aroma of a fresh brewed coffee poured and the
28
Yes, sir.
Oui, monsieur.
Is one day I can say daddy Jo without my mouth filling all the
Est-ce qu'un jour je pourrai dire : papa Jo, sans que ma bouche
s'emplisse de tous ces petits cailloux qui roulaient maintenant
entre le papa et le Jo ?
until he has not seen the two empty hands of his benefactor,
repu tant qu'il n'aura pas vu les deux mains vides de son
beloved Guadeloupe:
Five years, yeah. Five years that I have not set foot there ... no
de sa Guadeloupe chrie :
Cinq ans, oui. Cinq ans que j'y ai pas mis les pieds... A pa j!
Est-ce que tel endroit est toujours pareil ?
Oh, they built a new town hall! The highway! you mean: the
29
highway! which cuts the mourning of cows and the river where I
Et puis encore :
cane that they used to crush there! And distillery! bankrupt! And
this, and this, and such a place and such a person? From time to
time, his eyes left the road ahead and he cast a glance at his
big smile escorted by his long hands with red nail polish which
beat like the wings of a bird taking off. Outside, everything was
aux ongles rouges vernis qui battaient ainsi que les ailes d'un
directions, uncountable.
dans les rues entre les immeubles. Et les voitures, pareilles des
fourmis sur un chantier, allaient en tous sens, innombrables.
30
daughter.
Come on, give me a kiss, Felicie. See you soon, do not worry.
When she slammed the door, bits of icy air came to rest on my
Quand elle a claqu la portire, des bouts d'air glac sont venus
se poser sur ma valise, puis ont gliss dans mon cou, comme un
serpent. J'ai frissonn.
We're not very far off, said Papa Jo. You'll see, as we will
waiting for you for so many years. She loves you very much you
know.
tu sais.
Dans ma tte, les papa Jo filaient aussi vite que des autos sur
This is ours, 3. Put this figure in your head, Felicie. 3.3.3. Stairs
Franaises que Titi achetait une ou deux fois l'an pour se donner
real home with fireplace, tile roof, flowers on the balcony, small
Hey, look up there, the glass at the madras curtains ... Count
count five windows from the left. You see! This is our home!
You're happy!
J'ai dit oui parce qu'il avait l'air vraiment content lui-mme.
But at the top of the building, within the clouds, there was the
my old hut with both feet on dry land rather than ascending to
encore rester dans ma vieille case, les deux pieds sur la terre
heaven in my lifetime!
walls, painters had wiped their palette, smeared a bit and wrote
punch.
This lift is really emm ... I do not want to hit ten floors with
Cet ascenseur est vraiment emm... J'ai pas envie d'me taper
Would the elevator obey Papa Jo and stop on the 10th floor? -
33
front of my eyes. Papa Jo was looking for his keys. And Mom
was behind the door. I barely had time to see her face when I
was already in her arms against her chest, breathing in the smell
of milk. She threw herself on me, like a thirsty person who falls
ses bras, tout contre sa poitrine, respirant son odeur de lait. Elle
up.
You're big!
T'es grande !
Mimi. She sent me a little smile and then went away to the
allez rveiller Mimi. Elle m'a envoy un petit sourire et puis s'en
vernis.
34
covered with bright red velvet seats and paintings opening onto
Come see your room, Felicie, he spoke softly. It's been a year
regardent d'un air absent les plantes vertes et grasses alignes sur that it's ready, with floral bedspreads and everything. But I warn
le sol.
We had just heard a faint grunt when Mom had already rushed to
du bb.
Papa Jo took the baby in his arms, rocked him a little, and
Mais si, Jo !
Come on, take him! You must get used to it! Mom said.
Il est si petit...
35
nothings to her Mimi. Does she had shown me the same love
before leaving me ten years ago? I had just come back into her
life and she had given me less attention than to her Mimi that
After lunch, it was I who gave his bottle to Michael. Mom put
herself beside me. Then she began to talk as if she were talking
to herself ... "It's been so long that I waited for this moment. I
cannot believe that you are finally reunited. After so many years.
I could not take Felicie before. Everyone can understand that ...
door 1035. Finally, I can breathe well on the 10th floor. Provided
I do not think about the height from the ground and not to look
Cela fait une semaine que je vis la Cit, btiment 3, escalier B,
Whew! I can call him "daddy Jo" without forcing myself. I spat
out all the little pebbles. I have nothing to say, he is really nice.
And Mimi, it's the same. A fallen angel like Mom said. Mom ...
terre.
who knows how to distinguish black from white and day from
tous les petits cailloux. J'ai rien dire : il est vraiment gentil. Et
night.
nuit.
36
Parfois, elle est plus douce que Titi, la maman de Laurine, elle
coming, but when looked up, I meet her cold eyes fixed on me. I
do not worry too much because she does the same with daddy
Jo. Mom, shes a moody person. She goes from gaiety to sorrow
in less than two. And better shut up! This is the method of Papa
ses yeux froids braqus sur moi. Je ne m'inquite pas trop parce
quelle fait pareil avec papa Jo. Maman, c'est une personne
the 7th, it's worse. There's thugs who rob old ladies, smoke
Oui, mon nouveau papa est gentil. C'est lui qui m'a fait visiter
du 7, c'est pire. Y'a des voyous qui volent les vieilles dames,
Now you know the way. You can get by all alone. But do not go
37
Dont lie around and count your pennies, Felicie!
Dans la Cit, il y a un libre-service tout le monde l'appelle
I enter the elevator without light. I press the filthy button. I give
regular old.
son repas.
change but even so does not notice anything. With this money, I
buy stamps and I write Man Ya. I say nothing of this to mom
argent, j'achte des timbres et j'cris Man Ya. J'en dis rien
secret. Man Ya can neither read nor write, but I trust Laurine.
I have guy and girlfriends at school. They are perched, like me,
in the tall houses of the city. They are French, North African,
38
this year. The teacher, Mrs Dupuis, does a sermon every day:
The level is poor, children. You are already disadvantaged. You
Jai des copains et des copines l'cole. Ils sont tous perchs,
have to work more than the others, otherwise you will not
comme moi, dans les maisons hautes de la Cit. Ils sont franais,
you?
faut travailler plus que les autres, sinon vous ne russirez rien
size up this mountain that she presents to them daily and on top
babys!
Tandis qu'elle secoue la tte, comme si elle essayait de dcrocher "disadvantaged" and the impossible "work more than the
toute l'impuissance qui sagrippait ses boucles blondes, la
others!" Some still are taken to imagine what the "we" will make
last in the class. He lives in the city since his fifth birthday.
dresses, where French was not running in the streets, where the
teachers did not wave their blond hair. Mrs Dupuis repeats
cinquime anniversaire.
39
Mohamed barely touch and go their way, like small white sheep
rpte d'un air contrit qu'il n'y a plus aucun espoir pour lui, qu'il
Chaque soir, maman fouille dans mon sac (elle a lu a dans les
She did not really understand, but she was not joking, and I had
I rushed:
lacking when ... Then she asked for that of the "Ploughman and
demandait :
autumn violins...
"And I am going to the ill wind that carries me away from here,
from there, like dead leaves." The Prayer of a little negro child
When I declaimed:
40
go there... The negroes, you know only too worked. Why must
we learn more from books that tell us about things that are not
here.
recital with "La Journey Around the World" by Paul Fort ... "So
que je n'y aille plus... Les ngres vous le savez n'ont que trop
the class. The teacher called mom and told her about placing me
Ben, ma fille, c'est une trangre aussi. L'an pass, elle tait
Understand that it is for her good, maam! The riffraff will rub
off on her if you send her to the City school. I want better for
41
of kids ... Well, this is the first time I meet such a high standard.
If you push her, she will give you much satisfaction. Felicie is
souhaite mieux pour Flicie. Elle a pos sa main sur mon paule.
an excellent student, the best! I would hate to see her ruin her
Vous savez, cela fait quatre ans que j'enseigne ici, au CM2. Et,
j'en ai vu dfiler des gamins... Eh bien, c'est la premire fois que
je rencontre un aussi bon niveau. Sa main pesait une tonne sur
Now in her last sentence, she removed her hand and looked at
cette banlieue.
smiled at me.
Arrive sa dernire phrase, elle a repris sa main et m'a regarde When we returned home, she kissed me on both cheeks and gave
longuement. J'ai vu passer l'ombre de la piti dans ses yeux. Je
Good God, I didnt believe that you would have made me this
surprise, Felicie. Well! She has the right to you, your teacher... I
didnt think that one day I would have a daughter who is first in
Quand nous sommes rentres chez nous, elle m'a embrasse sur
What! She cannot even read ABC ... Do not start telling me
ah a non! Jur !
42
Yes, Mom.
Quoi ! elle sait mme pas lire B.A. BA... Commence pas
Her tone had softened, but her eyes gleamed as if her anger was
Oui, maman.
Allez, c'est pas grave...
It was at this time that Papa Jo arrived. He had not put down his
coat than mom was already shouting the good news, Hey, Jo!
With Mom, for the first time, I went to Paris, capital of France,
ferraille qui rampe dans tous les sens en faisant craquer ses
vieilles jointures.
43
people too far from the white, have the right to go buy elsewhere
placed on the kitchen table bags where the large blue letters
The vendors did not care. One cold speak of robots programmed
of mom.
why I dreamed about her, I think. I saw her lying on her bed,
maman.
eyes wide. The hut had lost will tin roof and Man Ya stared at
44
those of the City. She was wearing her dress Sunday, the one
with the beautiful pink, orange and purple flowers, all pleated on
pourquoi jai rv d'elle, je crois. Je l'ai vue, couche sur son lit,
the front. She was talking but I could not hear. I was just on top
les yeux carquills. La case avait perdu vont toit de tle et Man
words. When she recognized me, her eyes began to roll, her
celle avec les belles fleurs roses, orange et mauves, toute plisse
But all sweetly, my cloud moved away from the hut. I was
room. One didnt hear a sound, not even Michel sucking his
ses cils battre. Mais, tout doucement, mon nuage s'est loign
one day he told me that his grandmother lived with him. It was
Man Ya was so far from me. How did she really live in her new
danger? A cyclone! A cyclone had to pull the old tin roof of her
Ben Doussan est entr dans mes penses. Peut-tre parce qu'un
rickety hut!
But no ... I chased those bad thoughts with the back of my hand:
In the store that dresses the girls, mom offered me to choose two
bancale !
45
very kind. She sincerely tries to keep her temper at the same
temperature.
choisir deux robes. En fait, depuis que j'ai ramen mon carnet de
notes, elle se montre trs gnreuse, trs gentille. Elle essaye
We left the store with two dresses. I did not have the courage to
tight against each other, encumbered with our large TATI bags -
Mom bought oysters and a large turkey for Christmas Eve. She
told me that it was the tradition here and I had to adapt to the
main dans la sienne. J'ai ferm les yeux et j'ai pens de toutes
whole turkey. Man Ya has never seen one either. In the country,
Man Ya.
with large forgotten white feathers that must have been hard to
dinde.
46
shop which was not far from home, Man Zizine had to separate
before throwing them in the tray of her balance bop, bop bop!
We laughed a bit but could not help but thinking of eating rare
fois, dans le lolo qui se trouvait pas loin de chez nous, Man
from a historical point of view, it was not fake, given that the
game birds quail, guinea fowl, turkey, etc - were from India.
Christmas tree, all green with golden balls and glittering tinsel.
n'tait pas faux, tant donn que les gallinacs caille, pintade,
tout !
47
usual, when she spoke, her hands were taken with great
agitation. One day, Man Ya told me that people who cannot hold
Of course, Mom did not fail to tell Marie Claire that I was the
que les personnes qui ne peuvent retenir leurs mains quand leur
Then she fixed her hair before sinking back into the arms of the
peau o piquer leur dard zip ! C'est--dire, des gens qui n'ont
man who accompanied her. We all sat in the living room. Thighs
Then a silence sat with us. After a minute or two, mom stood up
m'a tire elle pour m'embrasser quatre fois sur les joues. Puis,
her and they spun into the kitchen. Papa Jo, who did not know
I hoped that word would get out. But it was closing to stretch in
Marie-Claire l'a imite et elles ont fil dans la cuisine. Papa Jo,
mom and her friend. I had nothing else to do than to look right
48
little? And my greeting card, had she received it? We would have
faire que regarder droit devant moi, alors je suis partie dans mes
never stayed, sitting stiff, tight thighs, in a room with the only
hutres, sans chocolat... mais quels Nol ! Sans neige, sans sapin
Titi, Max and Laurine were all Man Yas children. We celebrated
Sometimes Man Ya said that Titi had replaced the daughter that
she had lost in France. And that if she got sick, Robert would be
Robert, Titi, Max et Laurine taient tous les enfants de Man Ya.
pig for Christmas. I've known ten of them. All christened Paulo.
suffocated under the weight of his belly. Robert thought that this
49
name brought luck to his pigs which, like the first Paulo,
wood peas, soft yams. The whole day was spent in the hustle and
bustle of preparations for the meal. But it was when the drum
beater arrived, the drum on his back, crowned with the glorious
Christmas party really started up. One served them, with respect,
plates full of peas, yams and pig. One deposited near them a
bottle of rum. From the first knock on the taut skin of the drum,
roussi avec des pois de bois frais, des ignames tendres. Toute la
Every year, I thought that the good Lord, moved, went down to
tendues des ka, les voix montaient vers le ciel. Et mon cur se
Terre, and resume the chorus: ... I see, I see the ... evening
serrait.
sing the coming of Christ, Man Ya told me. But also to enjoy,
tambour, danse.
eat ones belly full, drink, laugh, dance and forget the bad days.
50
Chaque anne, j'ai pens que le Bondieu, mu, allait descendre
Mom took from the kitchen a silver tray on which were aligned
sur la terre, rien que pour chanter avec les tanbouy aux voix
a funny story. They laughed like partners. And mom could not
Ya. Mais aussi pour profiter, manger plein son ventre, boire, rire,
into the chair next to the gentleman who looked at the bottom of
Bernard!
Very, he replied.
and silver cutlery. Mom was very playful. It seemed that the
had not cooked oysters, she even got up from the table to kiss
hein, Bernard !
Un peu plus tard, nous avons dn. Maman avait sorti une nappe
blanche, des assiettes en porcelaine, des verres fins dcors de
petites fleurs grattes, et des couverts argents. Maman tait trs
enjoue. On aurait dit que la gaiet de Marie-Claire dteignait
On the other hand, I gladly ate turkey with chestnuts and the
sur elle. Quand j'ai demand pourquoi on n'avait pas fait cuire
who didnt stop refills, began to laugh louder and poked her
rire dans mes cheveux, tandis que papa Jo m'expliquait que ces
head in Bernards neck. He was all red under his freckles. Papa
Jo took mom by the waist, like he would ask her to dance. Mom
seule.
51
Par contre, j'ai mang de bon cur la dinde aux marrons et la
plus fort et piquer de la tte dans le cou de Bernard. Il tait tout the Christmas of France or Guadeloupe. To please her, I said I
rouge sous ses taches de son. Papa Jo tenait maman par la taille,
saisie.